66: Triggers - Creating Behaviour That Lasts
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The screws aren't evenly done on my soundproofing thing here. That's annoying.
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I recommend not touching it.
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Right now. Please.
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Let's not touch it.
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You don't want me to touch the soundproofing?
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I don't want you to touch the soundproofing.
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I don't see why I shouldn't touch the soundproofing stuff.
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Please don't touch the soundproofing.
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Oh, the hook just came undone at the top of the soundproofing.
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Did you touch it? Hold on.
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See? I f***ing told you. Don't touch it.
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I just saw the hook undo from the top. Hold on a second.
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Ok, the hook's back in.
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in. That thing only weighs like 300 pounds if it falls on me it's no problem.
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Why does it weigh 300 pounds? What is it?
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It's a mobile recording booth panel thing. You're supposed to have four of them. I don't
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know who thinks this is mobile because when the guys delivered it, it weighed so much.
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Why do you have to like, I don't understand why you have to construct a room inside of
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your office.
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Look, I'm basically building like a little black monolith in which I will reside to record
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the podcasts and I don't see what's wrong with that or why you would disapprove of that.
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Gray it is merch time.
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We have Cortex merchandise, we have new t-shirts and a hoodie for the first time.
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We have a whole selection.
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It's the first time we've ever done this.
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We have four different styles of product for you to go and buy, Cortex listeners.
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I want to give people a very brief rundown of what we've got.
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You can go to cortexmerch.com to check out the range.
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I love that URL by the way, Myke. I love that.
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I figure you got to make it easy for people. I realized this in the past. It's always been
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like, "Oh, go to here, find the link." No. Cortexmerch.com. That's where you go to buy
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our merchandise.
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Boom. Very professional.
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We are partnering with our friends at Cotton Bureau. Cotton Bureau make the best quality
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t-shirts that I've ever worn. They do worldwide shipping. They have great pricing for Europe
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and places like that too. We have three t-shirts available and a hoodie. For the first time
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ever we are selling merchandise with our logo on it.
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A little behind the scenes here, listeners, because Myke is very excited about these t-shirts.
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Very excited!
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As I'm sure you can hear in his voice, he's very excited.
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He's been working on this for a long time, sending me updates, images to approve.
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That's my job, to give a little tap back reply, thumbs up on things.
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But Myke has been, for literally years now, holding back merchandise with the brain logo
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I wouldn't say holding back.
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Holding back is maybe a harsher term.
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Just waiting for the right time would be what I would say.
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Alright, alright.
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Myke has been waiting for the right time to do merchandise with the brain and I have to
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agree with him.
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This is the right time.
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The stuff he's been sending me looks amazing.
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But if you've been thinking, "Why don't they sell a t-shirt or a hoodie with that amazing
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brand logo on it?"
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Well, today is the day.
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Today is the day.
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Today is your day to buy some brand logo merchandise.
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We have the original, which is the logo as you know it in the nice blue color that it
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And we have two special editions.
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Now these two special editions, this may be the only time we ever sell these two.
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One is the Kortek, which is a green brain, which is glow in the dark.
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I love that.
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I totally love that.
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And then we have Kortek's Aversary.
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It was the gold logo for our 50th episode, and we're coming up to like three years doing
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this show, so it's about the right time that we do this.
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So the Kortek's Aversary is super special gold foil.
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The brain is made of gold foil on the t-shirt.
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So you know, it's pretty special.
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And obviously, as you can imagine, t-shirt prices change as you would expect them to
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through that range.
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And then we also have...
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I think this might be my favorite part.
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We have a hoodie.
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So we have a hoodie that you can buy with the brain logo on it, but it's not printed.
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It is embroidered.
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And it looks awesome.
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It looks so good.
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I have to say, Myke sent me the images,
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some of the pre-production images of the hoodie,
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and my response was, "Give me 10 of those."
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- Yeah. - They look really cozy.
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I want them.
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I wonder if you can put in the show notes
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that close-up photo that you sent me
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where you can really see the embossed-ness
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of the Cortex logo on that hoodie,
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because I think it looks really sweet.
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- It looks really great.
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So here's the deal.
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For the time being, this will be a limited run.
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So the hope is that we might be able to find a way
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to sell these again in the future,
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hopefully on a more permanent basis.
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But for the time being,
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all of this merch is available for three weeks.
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It is available until April the 10th, 2018.
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So if you want it, and trust me, you do,
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go to cortexmerch.com, check out the range,
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and buy everything that you like.
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And maybe in the future,
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we might be able to sell some of these items,
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But I'll tell you the glow in the dark and the foil, this is the only time you're gonna get these.
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So bear that in mind.
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Yeah, those are the limited editions.
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The Cortexiversary, it doesn't come around all the time.
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It does not.
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It happened.
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We had that episode with the gold and, you know, that was it.
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There won't be another Cortexepisode with the gold logo.
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There won't be another Cortexiversary gold t-shirt.
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Gotta get it now.
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Especially, you only have three weeks to get this stuff.
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Maybe if you want to look really cool at an upcoming conference this summer, this seems
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like particularly good stuff to get.
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I don't know.
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I don't know if there's any conferences or cool events coming up this summer, but if
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there were, I certainly would want to get one of these shirts for said cool person conference.
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Especially, you know, if me or you are maybe at cool person conferences and, you know,
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I like high fives.
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So, you know, there are lots of high fives that could be given to people wearing the
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cortex brain.
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So, cortexmerch.com, go and buy some awesome merchandise.
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B: Yeah, just to be really clear though, grey high fives not included with cortex merchandise.
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N,o I was very careful about that.
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Like high five only.
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This little asterisk.
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Grey high fives cannot be given.
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You must check the purchase.
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Yeah, we have a whole little thing.
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I don't even want to think about travel.
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I have no idea what I'm doing.
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But I'm just saying, summertime, conference time, you want to look cool.
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What could be cooler than a glow in the dark brain t-shirt?
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I don't know anything.
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Or a gold one.
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Can you imagine a gold foil with the hoodie?
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You want to double up?
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I mean I feel like you have to, right?
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That's a pretty sweet situation you've got going on.
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Be the bling master.
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I want to talk about one of those events in a minute but should we do some yearly theme
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So I've been, uh, I've not decided where my journal fits into my yearly theme yet.
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I know it's in one of them.
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I just haven't worked out which one.
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Can you remind the listeners and me in this moment what your two themes are?
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I feel like because you went with two, I can't remember either of them.
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They've flown right out of my head.
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The year of adulting.
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Uh, okay, right.
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Year of adulting.
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And the year of branching out.
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Year of branching out.
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I feel like the journal is much more branching out than year of adulting.
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The year of adulting is like for some very specific events, right?
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The big theme for me this year is the year of branching out.
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And this is one of those things in a way because it is a little bit different to any… it's
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a little bit outside of my usual comfort zone to like sit and write a journal every day.
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But I've been doing it every day.
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I don't do it on weekends is what I've come to… it's just a thing that I don't
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really feel like I need to because as well a lot of what goes in my journal is very work-focused.
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focused, so I tend not to write on the weekends unless I'm having a working day on the weekend.
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But yeah, I've been keeping it up. I added in one of your suggestions after the last episode
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of the "What's on my mind?" heading. And I found that to be really helpful because sometimes I want
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to write some stuff down that doesn't fit in something good, something bad, or priorities,
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or something like that and a lot of the time it is just how I'm feeling and that has been a nice
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edition which I don't use every day but it's good to have it there when I want it.
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- I'm glad that's working for you. I'm still very impressed with your...
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Now that we're... How long have you been doing this now? Must be what, a month? Is that about right?
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Since you started? - I can tell you actually because I wrote the date down. I've been doing this
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since the 20th of February.
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- Yeah, okay, so yeah, it's just about a month.
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I'm very impressed with that,
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because when we discussed journaling,
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and it got a little touchy-feely last episode.
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- Sorry about that, by the way.
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- Yeah, yeah, I don't know how that happens.
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This is uncomfortable.
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I need to discuss my feelings.
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- This is one of those things I have to tell you, right?
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Every now and then, just like you record something
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it's done and like you put it out there and that's it. But sometimes you get people reaching out.
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I had some friends like, "Are you okay?" I was like, "Yeah, I'm fine! I'm all good!"
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I had a few of those messages like, "You doing all right?" I'm like, "Yeah, no, I'm fine,
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I'm fine." Or like I've had people ask me things and then they're like, "I'm sorry to give you more
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work." No, no, no, we're good, we're good, we're good. Oh yeah, yeah. It's like that time I put
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out a video about death. I got a lot of messages from people and they're like, "Are you okay?"
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I was like, "It's just an interesting topic."
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It's just some kind of existential crisis going on.
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I was like, "No, it's fine.
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Like, if I ever put out a video about death again, people, you don't need to send me messages
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about like, are you okay, right?
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It's just an interesting topic."
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Yeah, but I could see that on a show, if you start talking about your feelings, people
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are like, "Oh, God, are you on the edge?"
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Doing all right.
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Some kind of breakdown, Myke?
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You doing okay?
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Yeah, so yeah, it got a bit emotional, but no, it's all good.
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I'm pleased.
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I'm enjoying it.
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I may be thinking about doing some different stuff in it after having read Triggers, which
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we're going to talk about today, but I haven't yet worked out how I would maybe add these
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So that might, that's one of the things that I want to go over when we talk about the book
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in a little bit to check in and get your thoughts on it, especially because I know that it influenced
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your stuff when you do any journaling.
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It was the case that after the last episode I was thinking, oh, I should really, I should
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really make a real effort about trying to do the journaling again.
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And then I immediately used the homework that I had assigned ourselves about
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reading that book as an excuse to not do it. Like, well,
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I can't do it until I've reread this book.
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And I finished my reread of the book this morning.
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So I have not, I have not done any journaling since the last episode. Again,
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I find this a really hard habit to keep up outside.
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So that's why I'm doubly impressed with your ability to do that.
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So I think, I think that's, but I think it's good.
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I think that's a good addition to the year of the year of branching out. It will,
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it will help you explore your ideas about branching out. Like,
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like what are you going to do? What does that mean for this upcoming year?
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Year of adulting?
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That's kind of a thing that the external world just pushes upon you. Yeah,
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exactly. It's like here, carry this boulder,
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this boulder labeled "Being an adult". But! Year of branching out, that's you looking
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towards the horizon, figuring out which way are you and the boulder going to go.
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I really wish you wouldn't describe it that way. I don't like the thought of the...
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You don't like the mental pictures that I paint? You didn't like my forest fire last
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time, although I'm still absolutely convinced that was the proper metaphor. I don't know
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if you saw, but people were sending you pictures of what forest fires look like when they're
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making a forest nice and clean by getting rid of all the underbrush. Did you find any
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of these actual images of forests burning down helpful in understanding the visual picture
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that I was trying to paint?
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No, it just reinforced my original feeling of why this shouldn't be the metaphor that
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No, I think it's great. And I think you should also just think of the year of adulting
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as like a boulder that is being harnessed to your back that you carry around. Not a
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thing that you choose, but a thing that is added on to you. And then the year of branching
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out is you deciding where to walk with the boulder.
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Oh, so like I put the boulder on top of the hill and then like drag it around.
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Yeah, you haven't chosen it. It gets attached to you. That's what happens. That's Year
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of Adulting. And then Year of Branching Out is where am I going to go now that I have
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this attached to me? That's how I if I were you, that's how I would like to think about
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That sounds very encouraging. I'll try and keep that one in mind.
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I think that's a healthy mental picture.
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You want me to talk about another thing I'm doing to branch out? Is that what you want
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Yeah, that's where I'm leading. So where are you and the boulder going this year, Myke?
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So WWDC is coming. This is Apple's conference where they announce all of their stuff for
00:13:02
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the next year. It's happening in San Jose again from the 4th to the 8th of June. And
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we're doing a live show. So last year we did not do a live show because we moved place.
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there is going to be a Relay FM live show at WWDC on Wednesday June the 6th. This is branching out
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because there is an audience of 900 people available in the room. The biggest live show
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that I've ever done had 230 people, so 900 is a step to make.
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B: It's quite an increase.
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S: It is quite an increase, but I'm very excited about it. So you can go and get tickets. We're
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We're doing this in partnership with a conference called AltConf, which is happening next door
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to where Apple holds their conference.
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I'll put links in the show notes, but you can go to altconf.com and they have tickets
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there for Relay FM live on June the 6th.
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You should come see us if you're going to be in town.
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It's going to be a really good show.
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We're planning out some fun stuff to do and yeah, I'm really excited about it.
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And just to be clear, you don't have to be a developer who's gotten a ticket to go to
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WWDC to be part of AltConf.
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That's the whole point of AltConf.
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Right, is that it's next door,
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it's the alternative conference.
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- And it's free.
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- Yeah, if like me, you are not a developer,
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you're not one of these gods who makes the apps for us,
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you can go to AltConf and it's cool.
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You check out things that are going on there
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How is the year of order going?
00:17:03
◼
►
Sorry, I had something in my throat there.
00:17:05
◼
►
Is it going okay? You sound ridiculous when you do that. Yeah, of course.
00:17:08
◼
►
Of course. Nobody says order like that. That's crazy. Why would you? Yeah.
00:17:12
◼
►
Why would you? That's ridiculous. But, um,
00:17:15
◼
►
yeah. So year of order, year of order is,
00:17:21
◼
►
is going well, but there's a thing.
00:17:23
◼
►
I feel like I want to get it on the record now just to put this,
00:17:26
◼
►
to put this at the beginning.
00:17:27
◼
►
I have a very strong feeling that this is going to be much more like
00:17:33
◼
►
the years of order. Like I think I have a feeling this is a theme that is not going to be done.
00:17:40
◼
►
It is a regime.
00:17:41
◼
►
Yeah, yes. You know what, that's even better. Yeah, it's like the regime of order. Yeah,
00:17:47
◼
►
I like that. I don't have any specifics that I want to really talk about on the show,
00:17:52
◼
►
but I can just say like, it's a thing that I'm being very deliberate and also very
00:17:57
◼
►
slow about. Like, I'm trying not to rush a bunch of things. And also, we'll make it into a bit
00:18:05
◼
►
later, but there are some things where I feel like the year of redirection/chaos didn't really end
00:18:13
◼
►
until like mid-February. There were some projects that kind of lingered over and I'm just being very
00:18:19
◼
►
deliberate with it. But I want to get it on the record now because future me might look like he
00:18:25
◼
►
he just couldn't think of a new theme for the year when we have our next
00:18:30
◼
►
discussion about like, what are the themes for the year? I want it.
00:18:33
◼
►
I want current me to save him and get it on the record that if that guy thinks
00:18:38
◼
►
we just need to have another year of order to lead into the regime of order that
00:18:42
◼
►
he was already thinking about it way back at the beginning of the year.
00:18:47
◼
►
It just, this feels like the more I think about it and the more I do it,
00:18:52
◼
►
It just feels like a much bigger thing than actually a single year because I really do
00:18:57
◼
►
feel like this is touching on lots of different aspects of my life.
00:19:01
◼
►
So I feel like this may be the years of order.
00:19:04
◼
►
That might be as well.
00:19:05
◼
►
I might be able to help you here.
00:19:06
◼
►
I've opened up the thesaurus.
00:19:08
◼
►
What about the year of procedure or the year of structure?
00:19:13
◼
►
The year of codification?
00:19:15
◼
►
You could just keep doing that, right?
00:19:16
◼
►
So it's like it's the same thing but you give it a different name every year.
00:19:19
◼
►
No, that's dumb.
00:19:20
◼
►
That's dumb.
00:19:21
◼
►
of symmetry. That doesn't even make any sense there, Myke.
00:19:25
◼
►
Ooh, Year of Harmony, I like that one. I could do some fun things talking about that.
00:19:31
◼
►
Year of Harmony, though, that feels like a very different kind of year than the Year
00:19:34
◼
►
of Order. Year of Order is not the same as Harmony. Year of Thesaurus is broken and it
00:19:39
◼
►
needs to be better at thesaurizing. But no, I'm not going to try to pull one over on the
00:19:46
◼
►
audience by giving the same thing a different name. I just wanted to get it on the record.
00:19:51
◼
►
And this is also again why I like to speak in terms of seasons and even this idea of
00:19:55
◼
►
the year of order, like, but when did, when does the year start?
00:19:58
◼
►
Like who knows whenever, uh, years to me, they can be two years, they can be one year,
00:20:05
◼
►
But I just have a feeling like this is going to be a much, a much larger project and I
00:20:10
◼
►
want to get it on record now for future me that that's, that's what's going to happen.
00:20:14
◼
►
Also, I don't really have any specific thoughts about this, but I can already see what is
00:20:19
◼
►
was going to be the first really major obstacle towards the year of order,
00:20:23
◼
►
which is yesterday.
00:20:25
◼
►
I was finishing up my travel schedule for the next couple months.
00:20:29
◼
►
And you know how we've discussed, you have that feeling of overwhelmedness.
00:20:34
◼
►
I definitely,
00:20:36
◼
►
I was looking at the things that I have booked myself for for the next several
00:20:40
◼
►
months. And I just thought, Oh God,
00:20:44
◼
►
like I got that real tightness in much. And I had this feeling of like,
00:20:48
◼
►
like travel sick without even going.
00:20:52
◼
►
This is so awkward for me because I'm, I feel I'm, I'm so sorry.
00:20:56
◼
►
I feel like I'm to blame for all of this.
00:21:01
◼
►
But here's the thing, Myke, you're not to blame for all of this.
00:21:04
◼
►
You are but a part of this, right? And of course you are part of it,
00:21:08
◼
►
but not remotely all of it. But, but it was,
00:21:11
◼
►
it was just a funny thing to be looking at the travel schedule and like,
00:21:15
◼
►
Oh my God. And recognizing that this was really one of the things that,
00:21:19
◼
►
that started me thinking about the year of order was doing all the travel last
00:21:22
◼
►
year and feeling like, Oh, it threw my life into chaos.
00:21:25
◼
►
And so I have like,
00:21:27
◼
►
I'm just aware of trying to think about this in advance and I've been thinking
00:21:32
◼
►
about some strategies that I'm just toying with right now about how to try to
00:21:35
◼
►
maintain order in my life throughout a chaotic schedule.
00:21:38
◼
►
But when I was running over the dates and plans and things with my assistant,
00:21:42
◼
►
She threw out an idea which was the idea that made me feel sick because I thought, "Oh,
00:21:47
◼
►
she's not wrong." But her suggestion was, "Well, why don't you just fly to America
00:21:52
◼
►
in April and not come back until the end of June?" I was like, "No, that's crazy."
00:22:01
◼
►
Oh, actually, it's not that crazy. It's not the craziest idea I've ever had.
00:22:06
◼
►
It's a crazy idea. It is. It might make sense in your situation. It doesn't mean it's
00:22:11
◼
►
That's crazy. It's a crazy idea. That is a wild thing to do.
00:22:13
◼
►
Because like at that point, like if you were like, you have a special situation.
00:22:18
◼
►
But if you were me, like I'd be pushing up against visa regulations.
00:22:21
◼
►
Like that's when it's a problem. Right.
00:22:25
◼
►
You overstayed your welcome in this country.
00:22:28
◼
►
I have a question for you on this, right?
00:22:30
◼
►
Yeah. Because you are a man who cannot be made to do things.
00:22:37
◼
►
Right? Like if you don't want to do something, you won't do it.
00:22:41
◼
►
And it kind of doesn't matter what it is. Like if you don't want to do it,
00:22:45
◼
►
you won't do it.
00:22:46
◼
►
Like people cannot pressure you into doing things because you're very strong
00:22:51
◼
►
willed like that.
00:22:52
◼
►
So considering you know how much of a stress this
00:22:57
◼
►
travel might be to you, why are you doing it all?
00:23:00
◼
►
I mean, why do we do anything, Myke? Because it seems...
00:23:02
◼
►
Well that's not a good answer to that question, Greg.
00:23:04
◼
►
But you do a thing because it makes sense to do.
00:23:09
◼
►
And this is one of the cases where I don't want to get into too many of the particulars right now,
00:23:14
◼
►
because it's just like a long story, but part of it just is that at this stage in my life,
00:23:19
◼
►
it makes way more sense and there's way more reasons to do traveling than there was before.
00:23:24
◼
►
And that's why I feel like I'm willing to suck up a bunch of jet lag and disruption to my calendar.
00:23:33
◼
►
And once I'm able to make that decision,
00:23:38
◼
►
I always feel like if I'm traveling,
00:23:41
◼
►
if I'm going to be flying to America anyway,
00:23:45
◼
►
I might as well try to double or triple up
00:23:49
◼
►
on what the trip actually is.
00:23:51
◼
►
So there's a number of times where it's like,
00:23:54
◼
►
oh, I'm flying into America for, I don't know,
00:23:57
◼
►
maybe a thing on the West Coast.
00:23:59
◼
►
And then immediately I start thinking about like,
00:24:02
◼
►
well, is there something I can do on the East Coast on my way in and also on the East Coast
00:24:07
◼
►
on my way out? And then I start planning things like that. So there are ways in which I am
00:24:13
◼
►
sort of the the source of my own problem. But I don't I don't view it as a problem.
00:24:18
◼
►
I view it as like, if I'm going to go through this anyway, how can I try to maximize this
00:24:22
◼
►
time, either in like a business way or either in a family or a personal way. So that's partly
00:24:28
◼
►
why my travel schedule does look a little crazy is I'm also taking things and expanding
00:24:34
◼
►
them a little bit in either direction to say like if I'm going to be there anyway what's
00:24:38
◼
►
nearby or can I combine this with another trip so that's why trips to America very quickly
00:24:43
◼
►
become at least two trips to America for me.
00:24:46
◼
►
Yeah see I'm still interested to see how this plays out though because that amount of travel
00:24:51
◼
►
was part of a big contributing factor to what made last year a year of chaos but now you're
00:24:57
◼
►
doing basically the same amount of travel but claiming it's going to be in order. So
00:25:01
◼
►
I'm keen to see where that goes.
00:25:03
◼
►
Just to be clear here, I'm not claiming it's going to be in order.
00:25:07
◼
►
Oh, I demand.
00:25:09
◼
►
I would demand, but this is a situation where you can't make demands of your future self
00:25:14
◼
►
because that guy doesn't listen. I'm not saying that it's going to be
00:25:19
◼
►
orderful. I fully expect there's going to be a lot of stumbling over the year of order during
00:25:25
◼
►
a summer of busy travel, but I'm just, because I'm thinking of, like this is the benefit of the year
00:25:30
◼
►
themes, it's like what do I want this year to be like? I want it to be more oracle than last year.
00:25:34
◼
►
Then it naturally starts me thinking ideas about if I am going to be traveling and I know from
00:25:41
◼
►
experience that it was kind of a chaotic disaster last year, what can I try to do to minimize that
00:25:48
◼
►
while I'm traveling? So that's all. I'm going to have some ideas about ways I could try to make
00:25:54
◼
►
it better. But no, there's the ideal of how I would want the travel to go and there's
00:25:59
◼
►
the reality of how it actually will go, but maybe there are some strategies I can try
00:26:05
◼
►
to implement to at least make it more like the way I want it to be than it was last year.
00:26:11
◼
►
I think we've got some really interesting themes going on this year and I think it's
00:26:14
◼
►
clear in the fact that we keep talking about them. There is like the two main things that
00:26:20
◼
►
we have going on, they seem to be moving way more than last year's themes. You know, like
00:26:26
◼
►
there seems to be more kind of like ongoing development with them. It's interesting. I
00:26:31
◼
►
think we both really, I mean, I know I have at least really latched on to my theme idea
00:26:36
◼
►
this year because it's branching out could mean so many things. So I may be putting too
00:26:42
◼
►
much on myself because I want to keep like going by the theme, but I will say that right
00:26:49
◼
►
now is pretty exciting.
00:26:50
◼
►
Yeah, I think it is.
00:26:51
◼
►
I feel like we both have particularly good useful themes this year.
00:26:57
◼
►
From some of our private discussions as well, I feel like they are particularly relevant
00:27:01
◼
►
themes related to like what has happened in the past year and what we expect to happen
00:27:04
◼
►
in the upcoming year.
00:27:05
◼
►
Like I think that they are good themes and it's nice to have the theme to orient your
00:27:12
◼
►
life and your mind around to just like keep focused on this idea as opposed to goals,
00:27:17
◼
►
which as we all know, goals are dumb.
00:27:20
◼
►
- Gray, I want to return to the real kind of temp poll item
00:27:24
◼
►
in the history of our show, email.
00:27:27
◼
►
I wanna talk about email a little bit.
00:27:30
◼
►
- Oh, the wheel, uh-huh, yeah.
00:27:32
◼
►
- Because I hate email apps again.
00:27:38
◼
►
- You're going through email
00:27:39
◼
►
what I went through with task managers.
00:27:41
◼
►
- Yep, I hate email,
00:27:42
◼
►
well, I'm going through it with task managers as well.
00:27:45
◼
►
I did, a couple of days ago,
00:27:46
◼
►
I kind of looked at my iPad and I was like,
00:27:48
◼
►
"I'm not happy with anything right now."
00:27:52
◼
►
All systems that I have, I am unhappy with all of them.
00:27:56
◼
►
I don't know why this is going on.
00:27:58
◼
►
- I have this very clear mental image of you,
00:28:00
◼
►
like a little child just with your arms crossed
00:28:02
◼
►
and frowning at your iPad, like, "None of this is good."
00:28:05
◼
►
- Kind of wagging my finger at it.
00:28:08
◼
►
- So what's going on with your email?
00:28:10
◼
►
'Cause you've been using what, Air Mail?
00:28:12
◼
►
- Air Mail is what, I've used Air Mail for a long time.
00:28:15
◼
►
despite its many problems.
00:28:18
◼
►
- Right, you have always been very upfront about that.
00:28:21
◼
►
- Yeah, AirMail is a buggy app
00:28:23
◼
►
and there are two problems that I have.
00:28:27
◼
►
One has been persistent, which has been nagging away at me
00:28:29
◼
►
in that when I have an email application
00:28:33
◼
►
and I send an email,
00:28:35
◼
►
what I don't want my email app to do
00:28:37
◼
►
is to completely lock up, which is what it does.
00:28:41
◼
►
- Yeah, that would seem bad, yes.
00:28:43
◼
►
So every time I send an email with AirMail,
00:28:46
◼
►
the app completely freezes for a period of time.
00:28:49
◼
►
- Well, it's busy sending the email, that's what it's doing.
00:28:51
◼
►
- I guess it is.
00:28:52
◼
►
So like I'd send an email,
00:28:53
◼
►
and then if I open another application into SplitView
00:28:56
◼
►
whilst the email's sending, everything crashes.
00:28:58
◼
►
And sometimes I can just leave it there
00:29:01
◼
►
and the app will just crash.
00:29:02
◼
►
What I will say for AirMail is they have a
00:29:06
◼
►
no error rate of like not sending that email.
00:29:10
◼
►
So like if the app crashes,
00:29:12
◼
►
They will always send it when the app is opened again.
00:29:16
◼
►
But I still just, I get frustrated every time
00:29:19
◼
►
I use my email application to send an email
00:29:21
◼
►
and my email application becomes unresponsive.
00:29:24
◼
►
It just feels like something that shouldn't be happening
00:29:27
◼
►
and this has been annoying me.
00:29:29
◼
►
- It's concerning.
00:29:30
◼
►
- Yeah, it is concerning.
00:29:32
◼
►
And then a couple of days ago I opened airmail
00:29:34
◼
►
and it sent every email in my inbox to the archive.
00:29:38
◼
►
- Okay, all right now.
00:29:40
◼
►
- I don't know why it did that.
00:29:41
◼
►
And I don't know why it did it. I couldn't stop it.
00:29:44
◼
►
And that was just the situation that I was in.
00:29:47
◼
►
Okay. I just need to pause here for a little bit of clarification because
00:29:51
◼
►
my understanding of your system is that you'll only ever have like seven
00:29:57
◼
►
emails in your inbox. Is that right? Yep. So it's, it's not,
00:30:00
◼
►
for other people, this, this is a huge disaster for you.
00:30:04
◼
►
It's obviously no bueno,
00:30:06
◼
►
but so you're losing like seven to 10 messages.
00:30:10
◼
►
here's the problem. Oh, I know what the problem is. I just wanted to clarify.
00:30:14
◼
►
I trust me. I'm not like, oh, you just lost seven messages.
00:30:19
◼
►
No, no, I understand. These are messages that require a response.
00:30:23
◼
►
Yep. They're all, they're the most important emails.
00:30:25
◼
►
Yeah. They're the most important.
00:30:26
◼
►
And they're over a period of time, which is not linear. Right.
00:30:31
◼
►
So when they are gone, they, they're just gone. Right.
00:30:35
◼
►
Like that's it now.
00:30:37
◼
►
and I had to reconstruct them from memory
00:30:39
◼
►
as to what was what I thought was in my inbox.
00:30:42
◼
►
So this is one of those, this is the worst kind of,
00:30:44
◼
►
for me, like data loss type problem.
00:30:48
◼
►
- When you know something's gone,
00:30:50
◼
►
but you don't know what it was.
00:30:52
◼
►
- Yeah, I 100% agree.
00:30:54
◼
►
That is definitely the worst kind of data loss problem.
00:30:57
◼
►
That's like a known unknown.
00:31:00
◼
►
Like, you know for sure there were seven to 10.
00:31:04
◼
►
Exactly how many?
00:31:05
◼
►
Did I get all of them?
00:31:06
◼
►
Did I forget one?
00:31:07
◼
►
Now, now you just live in a cloud of
00:31:10
◼
►
uncertainty.
00:31:11
◼
►
And also, that is the kind of thing
00:31:13
◼
►
that that for me.
00:31:14
◼
►
When an app does that kind of thing,
00:31:17
◼
►
you suddenly feel like I can't trust
00:31:18
◼
►
you to do anything.
00:31:19
◼
►
I don't trust it anymore.
00:31:20
◼
►
It doesn't matter if it's been
00:31:21
◼
►
working perfectly for that kind
00:31:23
◼
►
of error is the like, nope, I'm
00:31:26
◼
►
I need to just say like I am on
00:31:28
◼
►
the beta of M.A.
00:31:29
◼
►
Right. Look, I am on a beta version,
00:31:31
◼
►
but some of the problems
00:31:33
◼
►
that it has, basically all of the
00:31:35
◼
►
problems that it has still exist in the stable version. Maybe if I was on a regular version
00:31:40
◼
►
it wouldn't have archived everything, but honestly that was just the straw that broke
00:31:45
◼
►
the camel's back. I was already getting more and more frustrated with it. The reason I've
00:31:50
◼
►
never switched from AirMail is because I have never found any email application that works
00:31:55
◼
►
for me as good as that one does, like how my system works. So I've been trying to think
00:32:01
◼
►
do I need from an email application? So I have a few things I want to list. I need a
00:32:07
◼
►
unified inbox for multiple services, not just Gmail. It has to have great iOS apps, which
00:32:12
◼
►
include things like drag and drop on the iPad or even split view. There's an app called
00:32:17
◼
►
Edison mail that I thought was really nice, but they broke something and now it won't
00:32:22
◼
►
do split view and they're not 100% sure when that's coming back to the application. Well,
00:32:26
◼
►
that means I can't use it because now I don't trust them either.
00:32:30
◼
►
- Oh yeah, but I would be like,
00:32:32
◼
►
"Oh Myke, you can live without drag and drop."
00:32:34
◼
►
But if it's Split View, forget it.
00:32:36
◼
►
- Yeah, drag and drop I can live without,
00:32:38
◼
►
even though it's like, it's really important to me.
00:32:39
◼
►
If like, if it was the only feature that an app didn't have,
00:32:42
◼
►
I would get used to it,
00:32:44
◼
►
but I can't have an email application
00:32:46
◼
►
that doesn't work in Split View on my iPad,
00:32:47
◼
►
because that's how I use email applications.
00:32:49
◼
►
- Email application has to be next to Safari,
00:32:51
◼
►
otherwise it's 25% as useful.
00:32:54
◼
►
- Ideally, it would have a Mac app,
00:32:58
◼
►
but if it didn't,
00:32:59
◼
►
it would play nicely with other applications.
00:33:01
◼
►
Like I don't want an email app that like takes all of my email and does something to it,
00:33:06
◼
►
right? Like I don't want that.
00:33:08
◼
►
Asking for the Mac app has already set the bar quite high.
00:33:11
◼
►
As long as it plays nicely with air mail or mail on the Mac, I'm fine with that, right?
00:33:15
◼
►
Like that will do for me.
00:33:17
◼
►
Yeah. And by play nicely, you mean it's not making special custom folders to do whatever it does.
00:33:23
◼
►
But yeah, I agree.
00:33:25
◼
►
At some point I did try a couple of email clients that did that kind of thing.
00:33:29
◼
►
and immediately like, no, no, no, no,
00:33:31
◼
►
you don't mess with the folder structure of my email.
00:33:34
◼
►
Like, I don't care how good of an app you are.
00:33:37
◼
►
Like, you're gonna use straight up IMAP with my folders
00:33:40
◼
►
and you're gonna like it.
00:33:41
◼
►
Like, that's what's gonna happen, email app.
00:33:44
◼
►
None of these special folders and moving things around,
00:33:46
◼
►
because that also feels like,
00:33:49
◼
►
it's like the Evernote problem.
00:33:50
◼
►
Like, how do I ever get out of this system, right?
00:33:52
◼
►
Like, I'm gonna need to move at some point.
00:33:53
◼
►
So yeah, that's a total deal breaker.
00:33:56
◼
►
So I will say, I do use SaneBox right now,
00:33:58
◼
►
which does some of this stuff, like filtering into folders.
00:34:01
◼
►
But SaneBox can in theory work with any application,
00:34:03
◼
►
'cause all it's doing is applying Gmail labels to things.
00:34:06
◼
►
Right, so I like that, it works for me.
00:34:07
◼
►
But using SaneBox has introduced another requirement
00:34:11
◼
►
for an email application,
00:34:13
◼
►
that there has to be quick and easy access
00:34:15
◼
►
to labels or folders, however it calls them,
00:34:17
◼
►
and in a sidebar, which is customizable.
00:34:20
◼
►
So I've used a bunch of apps
00:34:21
◼
►
which shows me every folder or every label, that's no good.
00:34:24
◼
►
Because I only ever wanna see two of them,
00:34:26
◼
►
I don't need the rest.
00:34:28
◼
►
And so there are some apps that will do this,
00:34:30
◼
►
some that won't, any push notifications,
00:34:33
◼
►
and a big one for me is a clear business model.
00:34:35
◼
►
If I am gonna start using an email application,
00:34:40
◼
►
I wanna be confident it's gonna be around next week,
00:34:42
◼
►
and if there is no,
00:34:43
◼
►
I don't care what the business model is to a point,
00:34:46
◼
►
I just need to be able to trace
00:34:48
◼
►
where the money's coming from,
00:34:49
◼
►
and if I can't do that, I don't wanna use it.
00:34:51
◼
►
- Don't you just want it to be free though, Myke?
00:34:54
◼
►
Isn't free great?
00:34:55
◼
►
No, I mean, I don't care.
00:34:58
◼
►
I mean, so like I will pay.
00:34:59
◼
►
I have no problem paying.
00:35:00
◼
►
I'll pay a subscription.
00:35:01
◼
►
I have no problem paying.
00:35:03
◼
►
And I don't care if it's free, if it makes sense.
00:35:05
◼
►
Right. So like Microsoft Outlook, I know why that's free.
00:35:08
◼
►
Oh, that's a good comparison.
00:35:10
◼
►
Yeah, that's that's a really good.
00:35:12
◼
►
That is a free app that I could feel good about, too.
00:35:14
◼
►
Most free apps, I feel like, oh, this is garbage.
00:35:17
◼
►
Because what they want me to do is become an Office 365 customer.
00:35:21
◼
►
Like that's the business model. Right.
00:35:23
◼
►
Get me into the Microsoft ecosystem.
00:35:25
◼
►
like I'm fine with that or like Gmail, I'm fine with Gmail being free.
00:35:29
◼
►
You know, like I'm good with it as long as there's a reason for it.
00:35:32
◼
►
If it's just like, hey, we're a start up and our email that's free.
00:35:35
◼
►
It's like, yeah, but where's the money?
00:35:36
◼
►
Because businesses need that.
00:35:39
◼
►
And so, you know, and there are things right that I'm willing to accept.
00:35:42
◼
►
So like Gmail being free, I know it's because they use it to serve ads to me
00:35:46
◼
►
and I'm fine with that.
00:35:48
◼
►
So I just want something, you know, I need to know where the money's coming from.
00:35:51
◼
►
So I'm out in the email app wilderness once again.
00:35:55
◼
►
nothing is making me happy right now to move away from airmail, but I also don't want to be on airmail.
00:36:01
◼
►
So, I don't know, expect to hear more from me about this,
00:36:05
◼
►
but I'm out in the wilderness and everyone's gonna have suggestions and I appreciate them.
00:36:09
◼
►
Like if you think you have an app that can give me what I'm looking for, like I want to know in the Reddit,
00:36:15
◼
►
but my cursory searching has told me that nothing, nothing exists.
00:36:20
◼
►
- I assume that Gmail is free because the business model
00:36:24
◼
►
is actually, there's an AI that is slowly improving itself
00:36:27
◼
►
and it just needs access to more and more data.
00:36:29
◼
►
That's what the actual business model is?
00:36:32
◼
►
It's like, oh, the computer sent to you
00:36:33
◼
►
and it wants to know everything about humans.
00:36:35
◼
►
That's why Gmail is free.
00:36:36
◼
►
- That's a business model, you know?
00:36:39
◼
►
I don't care, as long as it's clear.
00:36:42
◼
►
- Are you a sentient AI looking to take over the world?
00:36:44
◼
►
That's good, at least I know what you're doing.
00:36:46
◼
►
You're not some fly by night startup.
00:36:48
◼
►
- I can accept it, right?
00:36:49
◼
►
Like the AI needs its brain juice and if you know any way it is going to get it, I suppose.
00:36:55
◼
►
That's a long list, Myke.
00:36:56
◼
►
I wish you the best of luck with this.
00:37:00
◼
►
But all I can ever think when I look at lists like this is just this fact of life that with
00:37:06
◼
►
anything, if you're trying to make a decision or you're trying to find something, do you
00:37:11
◼
►
have one requirement?
00:37:13
◼
►
Okay, you're probably going to be pretty happy.
00:37:16
◼
►
Do you have two requirements?
00:37:18
◼
►
You can probably find something, two requirements, that's still like a market.
00:37:22
◼
►
The instant you get to three or more requirements, I'm astounded about the non-linear descent
00:37:31
◼
►
If you're looking for something that has three or four things, your options decrease to nothing
00:37:37
◼
►
almost immediately.
00:37:38
◼
►
I'm looking at this, I'm looking at Myke has six bullet points, and he's like, "No, the
00:37:42
◼
►
universe is not large enough that anywhere has sentient life created an app that would
00:37:47
◼
►
meet all of these requirements for you. I think that's the situation.
00:37:51
◼
►
I'm willing to bend some of these. I don't know which ones, right? I think it depends
00:37:56
◼
►
on what the application can do for me because there are always changes I can make to my
00:38:01
◼
►
system. Like my requirements right now are built upon what I've learned in using air
00:38:05
◼
►
mail for multiple years, right? So honestly, the application that does the most of these
00:38:10
◼
►
is air mail and I am aware of that. But the plan is to try and move away from air mail.
00:38:15
◼
►
So I will make compromise, but I don't know what those compromises will be yet, right?
00:38:21
◼
►
Right, right, okay.
00:38:22
◼
►
Because I need to find an application where I'm like, "Okay, I like this app.
00:38:26
◼
►
It doesn't do this one thing, but I'm willing to look past that."
00:38:30
◼
►
Now, Edison was the closest that kind of did a lot of it,
00:38:34
◼
►
but its failing point might be the most important,
00:38:38
◼
►
which is, has to feel like a really good iPad app,
00:38:42
◼
►
because that's where I'm doing the vast majority of my email.
00:38:46
◼
►
So, you know, maybe I'll look at it again, but I'm not so sure.
00:38:50
◼
►
It looked like a good app.
00:38:52
◼
►
But if you do something to your application that breaks split view
00:38:55
◼
►
and you're not sure how long it's going to take to fix it.
00:38:57
◼
►
Puts you at a warning for me, right?
00:39:00
◼
►
Like, will this happen again?
00:39:03
◼
►
So I'm out in the wilderness.
00:39:05
◼
►
That's where I feel like I'm at right now.
00:39:07
◼
►
Like just there's emails, there's envelopes and paper planes all around me.
00:39:11
◼
►
That's what I was thinking.
00:39:13
◼
►
Those are the two that it's going to be, right?
00:39:15
◼
►
Because I've installed a bunch of apps onto my iPad, right?
00:39:19
◼
►
And I just have two rows of icons that are paper planes or envelopes.
00:39:23
◼
►
Email is neither of those things.
00:39:26
◼
►
There is no paper involved in email.
00:39:29
◼
►
But the paper...
00:39:30
◼
►
This is like the icon of the paper plane has just so become an email to me.
00:39:34
◼
►
Like, what do you mean the paper plane is an email?
00:39:36
◼
►
Obviously that's email.
00:39:38
◼
►
you send it off with a little cute animation where it swirls over as it goes.
00:39:42
◼
►
Like this is how we end up with a floppy disk icon as save.
00:39:46
◼
►
Yeah, of course.
00:39:48
◼
►
And we're in this world now where people don't actually send letters anymore, they send emails,
00:39:54
◼
►
that's how you communicate with each other, but now emails is somehow synonymous with
00:39:58
◼
►
paper from a design perspective.
00:40:01
◼
►
It doesn't make any sense.
00:40:03
◼
►
So like, I wonder the thing that replaces email, like what will its icon be?
00:40:07
◼
►
Like what will the eventual icon for email be?
00:40:11
◼
►
And then we're just going to keep going down that route forever.
00:40:13
◼
►
But as I was thinking a lot about email, it brought me back to something that you had
00:40:18
◼
►
mentioned last episode, that you were going to try and do something about your email
00:40:24
◼
►
backlog. And you'd mentioned you hadn't opened email for months.
00:40:30
◼
►
So my thought was kind of like, is it even worth it?
00:40:33
◼
►
Like, how do you go through that?
00:40:35
◼
►
Like, is it even worth going through it?
00:40:38
◼
►
Or surely all of the questions asked have been answered by the fact
00:40:42
◼
►
that you never replied.
00:40:43
◼
►
So like, isn't it worth just like command A and archive?
00:40:49
◼
►
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of this show. I got a lot of comments from the last show people were like, "Hey dude,
00:42:17
◼
►
have you heard of email bankruptcy?" I was like, "Yeah, I've heard of email bankruptcy."
00:42:23
◼
►
I think maybe for some people that can work, but that would not work for me.
00:42:29
◼
►
I will say personally, I think email bankruptcy is a terrible idea in basically every situation.
00:42:35
◼
►
I just don't think that's the right way. I don't know what the right way is to deal with
00:42:39
◼
►
20,000 emails, but I think it's not good because I feel like if you've done that once,
00:42:45
◼
►
you'll be doing it forever. Yeah, I don't know. I can see situations where it makes sense.
00:42:50
◼
►
I mentioned before, but like when I used to be a teacher and I'd, you know, be away for
00:42:54
◼
►
being sick or something and come back and there were just like thousands of emails in
00:42:58
◼
►
And that to me was like, oh, you're all, all of this is going away.
00:43:02
◼
►
And it struck me as I think the optimal case for email bankruptcy, which is important things
00:43:08
◼
►
will come back.
00:43:10
◼
►
And that was my experience that like in a working environment, email bankruptcy is,
00:43:14
◼
►
is in many ways much easier to do.
00:43:17
◼
►
to do an element of this at the bank, but not all of it though. And I would look at
00:43:23
◼
►
Yeah, I don't think that it's a totally useless idea. I just, I feel like, I don't know, maybe
00:43:30
◼
►
you need to be, as I was, a very strategic slacker if you're going to properly implement
00:43:37
◼
►
the email bank. Like you need to be at just the right position and you need to be able
00:43:41
◼
►
to have the expectation that other people will put in the effort to re-reach you about
00:43:44
◼
►
whatever it is that you need.
00:43:46
◼
►
But the reason that I'm not doing it now is a couple of fold.
00:43:54
◼
►
One of the things is I know that I will just never sleep well at night if I just archive
00:44:01
◼
►
a year's worth of emails and never look at them.
00:44:04
◼
►
I will not get the feeling that I want to get which is I have successfully dealt with
00:44:08
◼
►
this thing that I've avoided for a really long time because if I just archive it, I
00:44:13
◼
►
I will forever wonder about like,
00:44:16
◼
►
is the tax man gonna show up at my door with the policeman
00:44:19
◼
►
'cause I forgot to fill out some form
00:44:21
◼
►
that some accountant sent to me ages ago, right?
00:44:24
◼
►
Or like, is there just something important in there
00:44:27
◼
►
that I missed?
00:44:28
◼
►
Like I just, I would not get the sense of relief.
00:44:32
◼
►
- Yeah, 'cause a lot of those things that are super risky,
00:44:35
◼
►
those people won't care enough to contact you again.
00:44:38
◼
►
Like it's on you.
00:44:40
◼
►
- That's exactly it, right?
00:44:41
◼
►
And this is again, the difference about like the school scenario where email bankruptcy
00:44:45
◼
►
is possible is being a strategic slacker there, it's like, ah, whatever.
00:44:50
◼
►
Most of this stuff is not really my problem.
00:44:52
◼
►
Like I know the nature of this work is all of this is somebody else's problem and they'll
00:44:56
◼
►
they'll contact me again.
00:44:58
◼
►
I'm reminded of this every time the account that I pay every single month to do all of
00:45:05
◼
►
my tax stuff because I can't do it on my own when they send me an email and say, can you
00:45:11
◼
►
confirm this is all right before we submit it." And I think to myself, "Why are we playing
00:45:16
◼
►
this game? You know I don't know this, right? Like, you sending me this to be submitted
00:45:21
◼
►
for the tax, man. What is the point in me looking at it, right? This is when I'm reminded
00:45:25
◼
►
of this stuff. That drives me crazy. I hate that so much." I would do it on my own if
00:45:31
◼
►
I knew what this was.
00:45:32
◼
►
Yeah, I completely agree. That always strikes me as fraud. And especially in my situation
00:45:38
◼
►
where it's like there's hundreds of pages going to two different countries and several
00:45:45
◼
►
different legal structures.
00:45:48
◼
►
It's just so complicated.
00:45:50
◼
►
I was like, yeah, because also with three different citizenships, like it's crazy.
00:45:54
◼
►
And I always feel the same thing.
00:45:56
◼
►
Like, like my accountants arrange a signing day where I have come in and there is just
00:46:01
◼
►
a table full of stacks of paper and they're like, well, you have to sign all of this.
00:46:08
◼
►
you have to agree we did it correctly.
00:46:10
◼
►
- Yeah, and we play the game where they're like,
00:46:12
◼
►
do you want some time to read these 300 pages of,
00:46:17
◼
►
- Go put a coffee on, it's time to go.
00:46:20
◼
►
- And they're like, oh, we sent this to you
00:46:21
◼
►
in PDF form yesterday,
00:46:24
◼
►
and you agree that all of this is correct?
00:46:26
◼
►
It's like, dude, I always feel the same thing,
00:46:28
◼
►
like, I would never hire you if I could just do this.
00:46:31
◼
►
Like, why would we even be doing this?
00:46:33
◼
►
- I pay you a lot of money for this.
00:46:36
◼
►
Yeah, it's always a strange, crazy making,
00:46:40
◼
►
but there is that balance of who needs who more
00:46:45
◼
►
in the email exchange.
00:46:46
◼
►
And the other thing that's different here is,
00:46:51
◼
►
I think the nature of being self-employed
00:46:58
◼
►
is that you wanna make sure you've at least reviewed
00:47:00
◼
►
all of the messages,
00:47:01
◼
►
even if it's something from like six months ago,
00:47:04
◼
►
there is a way in which I wouldn't feel good
00:47:06
◼
►
about declaring email bankruptcy, being self-employed,
00:47:11
◼
►
without having looked through those things.
00:47:13
◼
►
And the other thing, which is not really,
00:47:18
◼
►
it's not really broadly applicable,
00:47:19
◼
►
but I just do sort of wanna say
00:47:21
◼
►
so people understand the situation is that,
00:47:24
◼
►
like when you're a person in the public view,
00:47:30
◼
►
sometimes you get sent interesting emails
00:47:33
◼
►
that are like, like the kind of thing that will happen
00:47:35
◼
►
is someone will say like, oh hey, I listen to the show
00:47:38
◼
►
and I work at Interesting Place X.
00:47:41
◼
►
Next time you're in city Y, if you ever want to see
00:47:43
◼
►
the behind the scenes, like let me know.
00:47:45
◼
►
And that's the kind of thing where
00:47:49
◼
►
if someone sent that email six months ago,
00:47:51
◼
►
it doesn't exactly demand a reply
00:47:56
◼
►
and it's a useful thing to kind of archive
00:47:58
◼
►
for future reference of like, oh, when I'm in place Y,
00:48:03
◼
►
someone sent me an email about this thing
00:48:05
◼
►
and maybe it's cool to do, right?
00:48:07
◼
►
Or people just contact you because they're like,
00:48:10
◼
►
oh, hey, I'm interesting person Z and I like your work.
00:48:13
◼
►
If you're ever in city, maybe we eat up for coffee.
00:48:16
◼
►
So that's also part of the like,
00:48:18
◼
►
why am I going through this?
00:48:21
◼
►
Because I think of emails like that as like infrequent
00:48:25
◼
►
and not even always accessible,
00:48:29
◼
►
but like infrequent little gems.
00:48:32
◼
►
And I do do my best to try to keep a record
00:48:35
◼
►
of all of those kinds of things so that when I'm in a place,
00:48:38
◼
►
I can try to search and be like,
00:48:39
◼
►
oh, has anyone in this locale ever contacted me
00:48:42
◼
►
about whatever?
00:48:44
◼
►
And so that's also why I'm not gonna declare
00:48:48
◼
►
email bankruptcy because almost certainly
00:48:50
◼
►
there are messages like that that don't require a reply,
00:48:54
◼
►
but are just like open doors in the future.
00:48:58
◼
►
So it's a combination of all of these things,
00:49:00
◼
►
like worrying about extreme negative downsides where the person sending a message doesn't
00:49:05
◼
►
really care about me following up like eventually it'll just be a big problem and then also
00:49:10
◼
►
like these very rare upsides. So that's why I am very slowly working my way through
00:49:19
◼
►
this and yeah going through email. I actually only just started this morning a little bit
00:49:27
◼
►
of trying to go through the email. Opened up the old email. Thought, let me do this.
00:49:32
◼
►
Let me start digging.
00:49:33
◼
►
How many are in there?
00:49:35
◼
►
Is not as terrible as people are probably thinking. I have in like the high hundreds
00:49:40
◼
►
of emails to go through. It's not thousands of messages.
00:49:44
◼
►
How is it only that many? I mean, I'm a little bit confused about that because I'm assuming
00:49:47
◼
►
that you also just get a lot of just like people contacting you for things, right? Like
00:49:52
◼
►
viewers and stuff like that.
00:49:54
◼
►
One of the things that is great is that years ago I took down my public contact email off
00:50:01
◼
►
of the web and I don't think I've ever mentioned it but I've been really pleased that over
00:50:07
◼
►
the years there's been like a half-life of random people sending messages to that address
00:50:14
◼
►
that has gone down.
00:50:15
◼
►
S: Because they come to you in other places right?
00:50:18
◼
►
On Twitter and on Reddit and things like that I guess instead where you welcome it and engage
00:50:22
◼
►
and want it to be.
00:50:23
◼
►
I think that is partly the factor like I'm reasonably active on Twitter and fairly active on Reddit
00:50:29
◼
►
Especially when shows or videos go up so people know that they can contact me there
00:50:33
◼
►
I was just like I was just about to say a thing which is like oh
00:50:40
◼
►
I'm I'm very likely to see messages on Reddit
00:50:43
◼
►
But then I was thinking like do I want to say that out loud because then people will try to contact me on Reddit
00:50:47
◼
►
Well, I don't know whatever but like that is the case
00:50:49
◼
►
that people send me a lot of messages through Reddit and it's actually not a bad medium
00:50:55
◼
►
because I often don't feel any real obligation to reply and still things are sometimes interesting
00:51:00
◼
►
that come through there. So I think there is a side effect of like accessibility in
00:51:04
◼
►
other areas plus like the internet and people kind of forgetting what my actual email address
00:51:12
◼
►
is or just like not bothering to send stuff through there. So over the years the amount
00:51:18
◼
►
of messages that I would get via email from people who just listen to the podcast or watch
00:51:23
◼
►
the videos has dramatically decreased in this like half-life kind of way, which is quite
00:51:29
◼
►
frankly fantastic.
00:51:31
◼
►
It's really great.
00:51:32
◼
►
And then the other main factors are the things that we talked about on earlier shows just
00:51:35
◼
►
that again much to my astonishment, Slack has absorbed, I mean literally thousands of
00:51:43
◼
►
messages and communications that would have been emails before.
00:51:47
◼
►
Like it's just uncountable how many emails Slack has avoided.
00:51:52
◼
►
So the real important communication happens through Slack.
00:51:58
◼
►
And then the other bit of a contributing factor is,
00:52:02
◼
►
which I do feel kind of bad about,
00:52:03
◼
►
but like people who need to reach me for something important
00:52:08
◼
►
have learned over the years, don't contact me directly.
00:52:12
◼
►
They just contact my assistant directly.
00:52:14
◼
►
and they know that she will get a reply back to them a million times faster than if they
00:52:22
◼
►
try to contact me directly.
00:52:24
◼
►
And in no small part often because she can just get the answer or like she knows what
00:52:28
◼
►
the procedure is.
00:52:29
◼
►
And so like there are a lot of messages that go to her that I don't even see.
00:52:34
◼
►
So that's the only reason why my my situation of having not looked at email hardly at all
00:52:41
◼
►
last year has not resulted in like 20,000 messages.
00:52:46
◼
►
It's resulted in like a big number and there is a thing that like the messages that are
00:52:50
◼
►
left there are all a little bit looking at things this morning like idiosyncratic or
00:52:56
◼
►
difficult to deal with so they're not easy messages.
00:53:00
◼
►
But it's not like a crazy pile that's going to take me an infinity of time to dig through.
00:53:09
◼
►
just like a bunch of messages that I will hopefully clear eventually and that I do want
00:53:14
◼
►
to clear eventually because I know that there is some stuff in there that I wouldn't want
00:53:17
◼
►
to miss and I also want to be able to sleep well at night.
00:53:20
◼
►
Is the plan though that you will continue to look at your email past the point of putting
00:53:28
◼
►
it all into order again?
00:53:29
◼
►
Yeah, I think I think what will happen or what I would like to happen for the year of
00:53:36
◼
►
order is that I figure out where in my schedule I should put a clearing of the email.
00:53:47
◼
►
And the problem is like as time has gone on, I have really found this interesting thing
00:53:52
◼
►
with my brain that has changed where my brain just really hates and is repelled by what
00:53:58
◼
►
I think of as administrative work in a way that it didn't used to be.
00:54:02
◼
►
Like I used to be much better at dealing with administrative work and I have definitely
00:54:06
◼
►
gotten way worse at that over the years. I mean my expectation would be it's because
00:54:10
◼
►
you have an assistant who handles a lot of that stuff for you now.
00:54:14
◼
►
Exactly like that like no doubt about it that's one of the main reasons is that it's like
00:54:19
◼
►
oh there's a ton of this stuff that I don't have to do and then suddenly it switches to
00:54:24
◼
►
like oh I have to do this administrative task like oh that's terrible like how annoying.
00:54:30
◼
►
So I have definitely gotten way worse at that but I need to as part of the year of order
00:54:34
◼
►
or kind of sit down and figure out
00:54:35
◼
►
when is it that I'm going to clear through my email?
00:54:40
◼
►
And it doesn't need to be on like a very frequent basis,
00:54:42
◼
►
obviously, because I was able to get away
00:54:44
◼
►
with barely looking at it last year.
00:54:46
◼
►
But I need to do this so that I don't have
00:54:51
◼
►
the nagging feeling in the back of my head of like,
00:54:53
◼
►
oh God, is there something in email
00:54:55
◼
►
that I need to deal with?
00:54:56
◼
►
That's the main reason why I want to do it.
00:54:58
◼
►
But I am very much aware that the email feels a bit now
00:55:01
◼
►
like the physical mail that comes to my house,
00:55:05
◼
►
where it's like, oh, this is a thing that I just,
00:55:07
◼
►
I have to deal with, but it is in no way
00:55:11
◼
►
my primary method of communication,
00:55:15
◼
►
or do I feel like it's a useful thing.
00:55:17
◼
►
Like email has really become a kind of janitorial task
00:55:22
◼
►
for me over time in a way that I find interesting,
00:55:27
◼
►
as opposed to being what it used to be,
00:55:29
◼
►
which was like a much more primary communication method.
00:55:33
◼
►
Well, I wish you luck in finding that app, Myke.
00:55:36
◼
►
I think of the two of us,
00:55:41
◼
►
one of us is going to have an easier time
00:55:43
◼
►
with his future of email.
00:55:46
◼
►
- I don't think it's gonna be you in a way.
00:55:49
◼
►
- You're not gonna find that app.
00:55:50
◼
►
- No, I don't think I am either.
00:55:53
◼
►
- I'll let you know when I get to the bottom of my email
00:55:55
◼
►
and we'll see if you found an app before then.
00:55:58
◼
►
Ready, set, go.
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►
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00:58:18
◼
►
So it's Cortex Book Club time and we're gonna talk about triggers.
00:58:22
◼
►
Anybody should need to get out of the way.
00:58:24
◼
►
We're gonna talk about triggers a lot and there's multiple meanings for the word triggers.
00:58:28
◼
►
But triggers are a specific thing which are in this book which don't really have any meaning
00:58:36
◼
►
on the other word other meanings of trigger but like this is kind of where we are I guess.
00:58:40
◼
►
The funny thing is the book really isn't even about triggers very much.
00:58:44
◼
►
Like I find the title very funny in a whole bunch of ways and one of which is
00:58:47
◼
►
It's like they picked a word that's not actually mentioned a ton in the book.
00:58:52
◼
►
Triggers are one part of many more parts to the systems and ideas that Goldsmith is trying
00:59:00
◼
►
to put across.
00:59:01
◼
►
So I don't know why they chose triggers.
00:59:04
◼
►
Triggers are a big part of it, but the daily questions and the questions that he talks
00:59:08
◼
►
about, active questioning, is also as important.
00:59:12
◼
►
It's very peculiar.
00:59:13
◼
►
There's a whole bunch of other things and I'm absolutely convinced there was just a
00:59:17
◼
►
meeting at the publisher somewhere where they were just trying to think of what the title
00:59:21
◼
►
should be and just pick it and like "let's go for a thing that's a single word" and you
00:59:27
◼
►
know "the book is published a few years ago before the word became slightly ridiculous"
00:59:30
◼
►
and I think like "oh that's a good word let's go with that" and like "oh no years later
00:59:34
◼
►
it makes readers snicker" but it was just I'm sure that's what happened they were just
00:59:40
◼
►
trying to pick a bold word to be the title of the book and yeah I don't think it's a
00:59:46
◼
►
a title that really suits the book very well. And it's kind of funny.
00:59:52
◼
►
You want to hear my kind of overall meta comments about this book?
00:59:55
◼
►
I'd, I, I, yeah, I am, I'm interested to know your general impression of this book.
01:00:01
◼
►
So I liked that it wasn't too long, six hours, which is, you know, for a business book, that
01:00:07
◼
►
is short. Yeah, that is rapid fire.
01:00:10
◼
►
This was in part because for whatever reason, they decided to not fill this book with unnecessary
01:00:16
◼
►
lists. There's not a lot of that in this book and that was a nice break to not have them
01:00:22
◼
►
list 25,000 things for every one thing. And every time that there was a list, I felt like
01:00:29
◼
►
that he was going somewhere with it, right? And he's actually only doing it to add context
01:00:34
◼
►
as opposed to filling pages. It was read by the author, which is always a concern for
01:00:38
◼
►
me, but I think he did a pretty good job.
01:00:41
◼
►
That's interesting, I didn't realize it was read by the author.
01:00:45
◼
►
Yeah, and that's always a red flag, but this guy actually did a good job.
01:00:50
◼
►
It felt pretty genuine and he was actually pretty good at it and he didn't have any
01:00:55
◼
►
really peculiar tics or anything that sometimes many people do, right?
01:01:00
◼
►
But that's why there are professional audiobook readers.
01:01:08
◼
►
I liked that it was modern, actually, because this is the first business-advicey-focused
01:01:15
◼
►
book that has clearly been written in the modern era.
01:01:20
◼
►
He very frequently mentions Facebook and Twitter and apps.
01:01:24
◼
►
It's going to date this book horrifically, but I liked that it was modern because I felt
01:01:30
◼
►
like these ideas have come at a time which is now, as opposed to these ideas were come
01:01:38
◼
►
to 20 years ago and now they're just trying to make sure that they still apply.
01:01:43
◼
►
Yeah, I am so used to these books being one of two things.
01:01:50
◼
►
Old or how to put it, written by someone who feels really old.
01:01:57
◼
►
Right, like someone who has a mind that feels old and it was almost surprising every time
01:02:02
◼
►
there's a mention of like, "Oh, that's a book from a few years ago this guy read."
01:02:06
◼
►
Like, oh, right, that was that was a modern thing or talking about apps and things like
01:02:12
◼
►
that. It's almost surprising.
01:02:13
◼
►
He made a "there's an app for that" joke at one point, which I thought was kind of funny.
01:02:18
◼
►
Yeah, I was like, all right, like, this isn't a very good joke, but I appreciate it anyway.
01:02:23
◼
►
You know, so it was it was good in that sense. Right. And I will say, actually, I liked this
01:02:29
◼
►
book. I actually liked it quite a lot. I was not annoyed at this book like I usually am
01:02:34
◼
►
of these books. So I think for that reason that you were right to recommend this one
01:02:39
◼
►
because it didn't drive me up a wall. So that was good. There was one there is one thing
01:02:43
◼
►
that was really, really funny to me is like how very proud he is of his air miles. There's
01:02:49
◼
►
like a whole section of this book where he keeps talking about his air miles, right?
01:02:54
◼
►
Like air miles come up a bunch, then like he just throws in at one point that he has
01:02:59
◼
►
the American Airlines like super mega amazing club thing like in that George Clooney movie,
01:03:05
◼
►
which he even references the George Clooney movie up in the air.
01:03:09
◼
►
Oh to explain it right.
01:03:11
◼
►
He builds it into a story about talking to people in service industries and seeing how
01:03:15
◼
►
they react and if they're engaged or not. But like it's all based around his super special
01:03:20
◼
►
air miles thing. It was just it was really funny to me. But yeah, I thought it was good.
01:03:25
◼
►
I thought it was good. I have some quite I want to dive into some of like the the theories
01:03:30
◼
►
that put forward in the book, but I had a couple of questions for you. I was wondering
01:03:35
◼
►
like why specifically you recommended this book for me like what parts in this book did
01:03:42
◼
►
you think would be good for me in my current situation? And what did you learn from it
01:03:48
◼
►
as well? I assume they're pretty similar things, but I'm keen to understand that.
01:03:52
◼
►
Well, I wanted to get your overall impressions first because I felt after the last recording
01:03:59
◼
►
that I had suddenly put myself on the hook a little bit and I feel like I had put myself
01:04:04
◼
►
on the hook a little bit with the listeners because when we've done most of these book
01:04:09
◼
►
clubs in the past, it's very much a, "Hey, we're going to read a book that's probably
01:04:14
◼
►
intolerable."
01:04:15
◼
►
Yeah, you took a risk, right?
01:04:17
◼
►
That's a real easy thing to say, right?
01:04:20
◼
►
Because you save most people from reading it and if someone reads it and it is intolerable,
01:04:26
◼
►
like Seven Habits of Highly Effective People, it's like, well, Grey warned me, right?
01:04:31
◼
►
Like it's my own dumb fault for reading this crazy book and if the reader reads the book
01:04:38
◼
►
and they do like it, well, then they can just think, oh, he's wrong, but I didn't waste
01:04:43
◼
►
Like I like this book, I got something out of it.
01:04:45
◼
►
And I was just, I've suddenly felt very aware of like, oh, I actually recommended the book
01:04:49
◼
►
and now I feel like, oh God, I'm on the hook, right?
01:04:52
◼
►
If the readers don't like it and if Myke doesn't like it.
01:04:55
◼
►
Recommended to me at a time when I really could do with not using six hours on something.
01:05:00
◼
►
Yeah, I know, right?
01:05:02
◼
►
That was like, I think you heard me in the show, like I was trying to back off because
01:05:06
◼
►
I know like, oh, Myke's really busy already.
01:05:08
◼
►
Somehow I felt like we got sucked into this vortex of I'm now going to steal six hours
01:05:12
◼
►
of your life away with this audiobook. So yes, I felt very on the hook this time. So
01:05:19
◼
►
I'm not gonna lie, I'm more than a bit relieved that you didn't start with a fiery tirade
01:05:26
◼
►
about how much you hated this book and how it was not worth your time and how you didn't
01:05:31
◼
►
need this nonsense right now in your life. So I'm feeling quite relieved.
01:05:35
◼
►
I will say, with the exception of Creativity Inc, which is not really a business book,
01:05:40
◼
►
right, of the books that we've done. It had some ideas in it, but it was mostly a biography.
01:05:44
◼
►
B: I feel like it's an outlier.
01:05:46
◼
►
S; Yeah. I would say that this is the best one. Just from an entertainment perspective,
01:05:52
◼
►
and from a lessons perspective, I think it had the clearest ideas that were, in a lot of ways,
01:06:00
◼
►
new to me, where a lot of these books feel like that they're kind of just telling you something
01:06:03
◼
►
you already know but giving you a different way of thinking about it. I thought that this one was
01:06:08
◼
►
was really smart and I liked it a lot.
01:06:10
◼
►
- So that's why I felt like I could recommend it
01:06:13
◼
►
at the end of the last show is,
01:06:15
◼
►
this one was recommended to me by someone who said,
01:06:19
◼
►
oh yeah, this is pretty good as these things go.
01:06:21
◼
►
And I really think that if someone's generally thinking
01:06:25
◼
►
about ideas about how to be productive
01:06:30
◼
►
or how to improve their situation in life,
01:06:34
◼
►
I think this is a pretty good recommendation
01:06:36
◼
►
because it's partly like what I was joking about before
01:06:40
◼
►
that the title triggers kind of makes no sense
01:06:43
◼
►
because the book talks about so much.
01:06:45
◼
►
I feel like it's relatively short,
01:06:47
◼
►
but it also covers a lot of ground
01:06:49
◼
►
and that almost certainly there are going to be
01:06:53
◼
►
very different things in here that will resonate
01:06:57
◼
►
with people at different stages
01:06:59
◼
►
or needing something different in their life.
01:07:02
◼
►
And so part of the reason why I mentioned it to you
01:07:04
◼
►
was because we were talking about the journaling last time
01:07:07
◼
►
and I was thinking about how, oh yeah,
01:07:08
◼
►
there was this whole section that's like,
01:07:09
◼
►
it's not exactly journaling,
01:07:11
◼
►
but it's very journaling adjacent.
01:07:13
◼
►
And that's the part that had stuck with me
01:07:16
◼
►
and kind of made me want to read the book again.
01:07:19
◼
►
But I also think for someone
01:07:23
◼
►
who has read fewer of these books
01:07:26
◼
►
or maybe someone who is more in the stage
01:07:30
◼
►
of just like trying to become a more effective
01:07:32
◼
►
or productive person, I feel like the first part of this book has a lot of great stuff
01:07:37
◼
►
in it as well of like, here's a way of thinking about stuff you just might not have thought
01:07:42
◼
►
about before.
01:07:44
◼
►
And that's the stuff that it'll be no surprise to listeners of the show that I really love,
01:07:49
◼
►
like trying to talk to and convince the reader like, hey, you're less in control of your
01:07:57
◼
►
choices than you may think you are.
01:07:59
◼
►
But there's also a lot that you can do to try to increase your autonomy or to make better
01:08:04
◼
►
decisions in different circumstances.
01:08:06
◼
►
And I think that's a good thing for people to hear.
01:08:09
◼
►
I feel like he does a pretty good job talking through that idea in a bunch of different
01:08:16
◼
►
And then there's just a lot of other ideas in the book, which I think are good even if
01:08:21
◼
►
they're not applicable.
01:08:22
◼
►
So I feel like in the middle third, there's a bunch of stuff about like working with employees,
01:08:26
◼
►
I sort of skimmed over the first time and skimmed over again the second time. But this
01:08:32
◼
►
is the same thing where it's like, "That section is not really for me. It's not super relevant
01:08:35
◼
►
for me and it doesn't matter and it also doesn't feel like I'm slogging through 200 pages of
01:08:41
◼
►
management theory."
01:08:42
◼
►
That section included the air miles thing.
01:08:45
◼
►
Oh, okay. So that's why it didn't register in my mind.
01:08:48
◼
►
Because it's about employee engagement.
01:08:50
◼
►
Right. And even there, it's just like, "Oh, okay. This is not for me, but I can still
01:08:55
◼
►
see he has some interesting ideas about like, here's four different ways to think about
01:09:01
◼
►
how your employees may respond to your feedback.
01:09:07
◼
►
And from talking with other people who actually work in big like that seems to be a useful
01:09:12
◼
►
section if you're in the right situation.
01:09:14
◼
►
But it's like, I can just blow past this and it doesn't matter.
01:09:16
◼
►
So I just felt like there's a lot in it.
01:09:19
◼
►
I think most of it's good and I really deeply appreciated, like you said, that it is not
01:09:27
◼
►
bogged down in a lot of the usual business book craziness.
01:09:31
◼
►
I don't think I have a single note about crazy stuff.
01:09:34
◼
►
One of the things that many business books do is to use examples of people, which we
01:09:39
◼
►
talk about all the time because they sound so ridiculous.
01:09:42
◼
►
And this book uses examples heavily, but I believe them because two reasons.
01:09:48
◼
►
One, they feel like real people, and the other, sometimes they are real identifiable people
01:09:53
◼
►
that he's talking about.
01:09:54
◼
►
Like he has a whole section talking about Alan Mulally, the ex-CEO of Ford, right?
01:10:00
◼
►
So like, it's legit.
01:10:02
◼
►
The guy actually does do things and help with like really important executives.
01:10:09
◼
►
And so if he's going to tell one story that I can see is true, then I'm willing to believe
01:10:14
◼
►
the rest as well.
01:10:15
◼
►
if I probably did some digging, I could probably work out who the people are, because he seems
01:10:20
◼
►
to be interesting in that way and works with some interesting people, but they're real
01:10:24
◼
►
people and that makes me respect the book way more if I believe that the person can
01:10:30
◼
►
actually do what they're saying they can do because they have a track record, which you
01:10:35
◼
►
can see exists if they've actually helped real successful people.
01:10:39
◼
►
Yeah, the examples of the people in the book, they're not Sarah's.
01:10:46
◼
►
Stories where they're just wowed with how amazing the author is, like in E-Myth Revisited,
01:10:52
◼
►
and view the author as some kind of savior figure who is passing on amazing knowledge
01:10:59
◼
►
and their entire life exists just to be a perfect parable of whatever the author wants.
01:11:03
◼
►
They really do feel like actual people.
01:11:06
◼
►
And like you said, he has named actual people.
01:11:08
◼
►
Did you happen to look at, in the beginning, the section where, before the book starts,
01:11:13
◼
►
but it's like people giving blurbs for the book?
01:11:15
◼
►
Did you take a look at that?
01:11:16
◼
►
It's not in the audiobook.
01:11:17
◼
►
Oh, of course it's not in the audiobook.
01:11:21
◼
►
This book has maybe the most impressive list of people I have ever seen giving blurbs for
01:11:29
◼
►
the book and working with the author.
01:11:32
◼
►
Give me some names.
01:11:33
◼
►
Jim Kim, 12th president of the World Bank.
01:11:39
◼
►
It's not for the big guns.
01:11:41
◼
►
It's like, I've had the great fortune of working with Marshall for several years and he has
01:11:45
◼
►
helped me in so many ways, right?
01:11:47
◼
►
It's like just glowing praise.
01:11:49
◼
►
So then it's like CEO of the New York City public library system, CEO of the Harvard
01:11:56
◼
►
Business Review.
01:11:57
◼
►
I'm just like, there's so many, I'm trying to pick out the ones that are more recognizable,
01:12:01
◼
►
but they're all, they're all just crazy.
01:12:04
◼
►
CEO and managing partner at Goldman Sachs. CEO of Rothschild's Group. Founder and chairman
01:12:12
◼
►
of Getty Images. CEO of Del Monte Foods, Inc. Managing partner at the Blackstone Group. CEO
01:12:20
◼
►
of Herman Miller. I have gone through 25% of the "thanks for
01:12:30
◼
►
working with me section at the beginning of this book. I have never seen anything like
01:12:36
◼
►
it. It is just crazy. So I didn't notice that until after having read it, but going back
01:12:44
◼
►
it was like, holy moly. This is no joke. And I think it's, I was astounded by the author's
01:12:51
◼
►
business model where his business model is he will work with these high powered people
01:12:58
◼
►
and he will not get paid unless people in the client's life agree that he has been effective
01:13:08
◼
►
at implementing change two years after they start working together.
01:13:14
◼
►
It's like, whoa, that is a man who has set himself up in a situation where he is going
01:13:20
◼
►
to figure out what is actually effective and what is not.
01:13:25
◼
►
And it is just remarkable that it's not even that the client gets to say, "Oh yes, I think
01:13:32
◼
►
he was effective."
01:13:33
◼
►
It's like, no, no, the client's spouse gets to determine whether or not he should get
01:13:39
◼
►
And that is a much higher bar.
01:13:40
◼
►
That is a way higher bar.
01:13:43
◼
►
So yeah, the author is totally not messing around.
01:13:47
◼
►
And I think that is why the examples in the book feel real.
01:13:52
◼
►
They don't feel forced or imaginary.
01:13:55
◼
►
He's just thinking about the clients he's worked with and people who are good examples
01:14:00
◼
►
of whatever he happens to be talking about.
01:14:02
◼
►
So let's go through a couple of the things that are focused on.
01:14:05
◼
►
We won't go through everything because, as you said, I don't think that it's necessarily
01:14:08
◼
►
all applicable for everyone.
01:14:10
◼
►
And there are some parts of this book where I've heard things like this before.
01:14:14
◼
►
The beginning section is about triggers and the triggers go hand in hand with behavioral
01:14:20
◼
►
That's kind of what the book is about, it's like changing your behavior.
01:14:24
◼
►
And I love that it basically starts off with being like, look, adult behavioral change
01:14:29
◼
►
is a really, really hard thing to do.
01:14:31
◼
►
It's really hard to change your behavior as an adult.
01:14:35
◼
►
I love this as the start of the book and I feel like it's something that really sold
01:14:38
◼
►
me on it is because, and I haven't highlighted, his section, this is like literally page two,
01:14:48
◼
►
is he's like, I'm going to tell you the truth.
01:14:49
◼
►
And the truth is that meaningful behavioral change is very hard to do.
01:14:53
◼
►
And it's a quote, "I'd go so far as to say that adult behavioral change is the most difficult
01:14:58
◼
►
thing for sentient human beings to accomplish."
01:15:01
◼
►
I love that quote so much.
01:15:05
◼
►
And what I love about it is I really think it's true.
01:15:08
◼
►
And he spends the next couple of pages kind of forcing you to think about it.
01:15:14
◼
►
And he's like, when was the last time you changed some behavior in your life?
01:15:18
◼
►
and he kind of knocks down the things that people are going to mention where they just discuss
01:15:24
◼
►
something that's actually different in there, like something that has happened to have changed,
01:15:29
◼
►
but he's trying to find a case where like you have decided to do something differently
01:15:34
◼
►
and you were successful in maintaining that change over a long period of time.
01:15:37
◼
►
And it kind of makes me think of why I like to talk about the time tracking so much because
01:15:43
◼
►
I think he does do a pretty good job of making you take a brutal look in the mirror
01:15:47
◼
►
and see how horrifically ineffective you have actually been at deciding to change something
01:15:53
◼
►
in your life. And he's like, and I think that's a great setup. It's like, this is going to be
01:15:58
◼
►
really hard. What you need to do to change your behavior is simple, but simple doesn't mean that
01:16:03
◼
►
it is easy. And almost everybody fails at this almost all of the time. And I just think that
01:16:07
◼
►
is such a refreshing start to a book like this. Because he even uses smoking as an example of not
01:16:12
◼
►
being enough because there are so many reasons that you might want to quit smoking that it's
01:16:18
◼
►
not really a behavioral change. Like you're doing it because your health is at risk or you're doing
01:16:22
◼
►
it because the people around you don't want you to do it anymore and so like it doesn't really
01:16:26
◼
►
count as changing a behavior, you've just quit smoking. And it's like wow okay you're messing
01:16:32
◼
►
around here Goldsmith, all right. Yeah that's exactly it. You're like don't tell me about your
01:16:36
◼
►
quitting smoking, I'm not interested. So we should talk about the triggers and there's a couple of
01:16:41
◼
►
different things that he talks about with the triggers but the real meaty one, the one that
01:16:46
◼
►
I find really interesting, is what is referred to as environmental triggers. So how, and this is what
01:16:52
◼
►
really hit me, your environment can make you react to things in certain ways. So like for example,
01:17:02
◼
►
if somebody speaks to you softly, you will speak back to them softly. That is an environmental
01:17:09
◼
►
trigger because something that you have no control over is making you react in a
01:17:16
◼
►
way that you wouldn't normally react if you had complete control of the situation.
01:17:19
◼
►
So somebody being softly spoken will make you do that too and there are these
01:17:24
◼
►
types of things that happen in our lives constantly. These different situations
01:17:29
◼
►
that we're in, different groups that we're a part of, that affect the way that
01:17:34
◼
►
we react to certain situations and an individual throughout a day can go through a myriad of these
01:17:41
◼
►
things in what may make somebody appear to do something that is in direct conflict of something
01:17:48
◼
►
they did earlier in the day because they're in a different situation. And he uses a great example
01:17:53
◼
►
of like a mother who is an executive. And at home in the morning getting the children ready for
01:18:00
◼
►
school, that is your environment and in that environment you are top of the tree.
01:18:04
◼
►
The kids will listen to you and you get them ready and you send them off. But
01:18:08
◼
►
where you're like a mid-level executive at a company, you don't tell everyone
01:18:11
◼
►
what to do anymore. You're in an organization and you may do something
01:18:16
◼
►
for somebody that you wouldn't do at home and it's like wow like okay I get it
01:18:22
◼
►
right? The environment that you're in can change the way that you react to
01:18:26
◼
►
certain requests and certain actions.
01:18:28
◼
►
- Yeah, I love this idea, and I feel like this really goes
01:18:31
◼
►
to the core of some of my beliefs about how people act.
01:18:36
◼
►
And just again, in this idea that you are,
01:18:41
◼
►
in different circumstances, a different person.
01:18:45
◼
►
I don't know, when I talk to people,
01:18:46
◼
►
I find a lot of people have a weird resistance
01:18:49
◼
►
to this idea, or they think of other people as like,
01:18:54
◼
►
"Oh, this person should be totally consistent all the time."
01:18:57
◼
►
But nobody is, people act differently
01:19:01
◼
►
in different environments.
01:19:03
◼
►
But I think he does do a very good job of trying to
01:19:05
◼
►
not just discuss that idea that you are different
01:19:10
◼
►
in different situations, but trying to bring it
01:19:13
◼
►
to your attention about when are you acting
01:19:17
◼
►
like a better self or a worse self,
01:19:20
◼
►
and trying to identify what is it in this environment
01:19:24
◼
►
is making me act better?" or really the thing that he's mostly focusing on is "What is the
01:19:30
◼
►
thing in this environment that is making you act worse?" And he has a little detail which I really
01:19:36
◼
►
like which is thinking about the human environment not just the physical environment. So he talks
01:19:42
◼
►
about people as an environment. Like you know if someone is not getting along with a colleague like
01:19:47
◼
►
he uses an example like a guy called Simon who's like causing problems for you with the office
01:19:52
◼
►
that you need to think about it as like you are now in the Simon environment and recognize that
01:19:58
◼
►
you have a history of acting poorly in this environment and like what can you do like step
01:20:05
◼
►
one acknowledging that and then step two trying to think about how to react in those circumstances
01:20:12
◼
►
but I just I really like that idea of people and combinations of people as a kind of environment
01:20:19
◼
►
that they're not just like... it's not like what I normally think of as like the physical space is
01:20:25
◼
►
the environment and the humans are like props inside that environment. It's like no no,
01:20:28
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►
the environment is the combination of all of these things. I think that's a nice addition into how to
01:20:35
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think about the way you are acting or reacting to what's going on. And this is where the triggers
01:20:40
◼
►
come in. So you have the environment, right? So use the Simon environment, the person you don't
01:20:44
◼
►
get on with while at work. That environment triggers you to react in a certain way. And that
01:20:50
◼
►
might be that you become very short-tempered when you're around that person because they frustrate
01:20:56
◼
►
you. And that's what you need to change. You need to change the trigger. You can't change
01:21:02
◼
►
the environment. The environment is what it is, but you have to try and change the way that you
01:21:08
◼
►
react in those environments and that's what the triggers are. The trigger is how you react.
01:21:14
◼
►
So like there is a thing that happens and different people react to that thing differently
01:21:21
◼
►
and every single person however they react that is the way that they are triggered. Some
01:21:25
◼
►
people can deal with certain things that other people can't etc etc. The triggers are different
01:21:30
◼
►
for different people depending on the environment that they're in and the triggered response
01:21:35
◼
►
is the thing that you have to try and change if you want to make behavioral change. So like some
01:21:39
◼
►
examples of ways that people have been able to deal with this stuff is like, here's an example
01:21:44
◼
►
of a guy who writes things down on an index card to remind him how to react in a certain way,
01:21:49
◼
►
or there's somebody who's taking friends out in a city and he's doing this a bunch and he's getting
01:21:55
◼
►
bored of like showing people the same tourist things, so he has a reminder go off on his phone
01:22:00
◼
►
to remind him like, "Don't be an idiot about this," right? Because his usual trigger would be to get
01:22:05
◼
►
grumpy. Or if you're around Simon, your usual trigger is to get like really snappy with Simon,
01:22:11
◼
►
but your trigger needs to be not that, right? The way that you react in that situation
01:22:16
◼
►
needs to be not that, and you have to try and change the way that you react in those
01:22:20
◼
►
instances in those environments. Yeah, like I think the practical example of the guy getting
01:22:25
◼
►
board showing visitors around the same events in the city. Like what he's trying to suggest there
01:22:31
◼
►
is you have a little reminder pop up on your phone because phones exist in this modern business world
01:22:35
◼
►
right? I did note, I thought like this is so simple but it's a great idea of having your phone pop up
01:22:42
◼
►
a reminder every 45 minutes asking are you enjoying the time with your friends right to
01:22:49
◼
►
to change the mental framing from like,
01:22:52
◼
►
"I'm at this statue of liberty for the 40th time."
01:22:56
◼
►
That you change the framing to like,
01:22:58
◼
►
"My environment is that I'm with my friends."
01:23:04
◼
►
And the question is like,
01:23:05
◼
►
"Am I enjoying this time with them?"
01:23:07
◼
►
Like don't focus on like,
01:23:08
◼
►
"Oh, I'm at the statue of liberty again."
01:23:10
◼
►
That's not the relevant thing here.
01:23:13
◼
►
And that like, that's actually a pretty great idea
01:23:15
◼
►
to just have a little thing pop up
01:23:17
◼
►
to constantly remind you.
01:23:18
◼
►
It's like, yeah, it's simple.
01:23:19
◼
►
And it's dumb, but I could totally see that being an effective thing to do.
01:23:24
◼
►
And I've actually in a couple of scenarios used something like that, whereas like just
01:23:29
◼
►
poke a little reminder to kind of ask me a question about the situation that I'm into,
01:23:33
◼
►
like reframe it mentally.
01:23:35
◼
►
And I think it's I think it's actually quite effective.
01:23:37
◼
►
So you used an example there of what are called active or engaging questions as a way to change
01:23:44
◼
►
the triggers.
01:23:45
◼
►
this is an idea of having a question that you ask yourself,
01:23:49
◼
►
which is like an open question that you have to react to.
01:23:53
◼
►
And this is how Goldsmith recommends
01:23:56
◼
►
that we change our triggers,
01:23:58
◼
►
is by having these ways of checking in with ourselves
01:24:01
◼
►
on a frequent and regular basis,
01:24:03
◼
►
usually with some method of accountability
01:24:05
◼
►
from another individual,
01:24:06
◼
►
as a way to try and enforce a change in us.
01:24:09
◼
►
So for example, I'm gonna give some,
01:24:11
◼
►
like a short list of questions
01:24:14
◼
►
that are given in the book as engaging questions.
01:24:16
◼
►
So like, did I do my best to set clear goals today?
01:24:20
◼
►
Did I do my best to be happy today?
01:24:22
◼
►
Did I do my best to be engaged today?
01:24:24
◼
►
And these are like questions that you have to give
01:24:26
◼
►
some kind of answer to.
01:24:28
◼
►
Like you have to like score them in some ways,
01:24:31
◼
►
the way that he recommends it.
01:24:32
◼
►
So like you give yourself a score out of 10 or something
01:24:36
◼
►
for like how well did I do in each of these areas?
01:24:39
◼
►
And this is one of the ways that you will change
01:24:41
◼
►
your triggers, the way that you react to things,
01:24:43
◼
►
because you start to frame your life slightly differently.
01:24:45
◼
►
Yeah, and this was really the core of the section that I was thinking of when you were
01:24:50
◼
►
discussing journaling last time because reading this book and sort of going through stuff
01:24:55
◼
►
and this to me feels like prime journaling material and I think this to me was the part
01:25:02
◼
►
of the book that stuck with me the most.
01:25:05
◼
►
I noticed it, like as soon as I got to this section I could see why you recommended the
01:25:11
◼
►
Yeah, and there's a few things that I really like about this.
01:25:16
◼
►
And, okay, so one of the things is, he has these questions that he asks himself every day.
01:25:23
◼
►
And they all start with, "Did you try your best to?"
01:25:29
◼
►
And when I first start reading this stuff, I kind of like roll my eyes a little bit.
01:25:34
◼
►
But then he immediately addresses exactly what's going on.
01:25:38
◼
►
And I thought like this is, this is actually a great linguistic change that he makes, he
01:25:43
◼
►
makes the point that we totally treat effort as, as what he calls like a second class citizen.
01:25:49
◼
►
And that what matters in behavior change is like, it's not actually the absolute record
01:26:00
◼
►
of, of success or failure.
01:26:03
◼
►
that what matters is you are keeping it in your mind as this is a thing that you are trying to do.
01:26:12
◼
►
And so in with that framing like it's perfectly okay to fail to achieve behavior change on
01:26:20
◼
►
particular days because that's not what the question is asking. It's asking like did you
01:26:25
◼
►
try, I feel like this book really changed my mind on that kind of framing around
01:26:32
◼
►
trying versus succeeding. That like effort really does count in this field in a way that in other
01:26:41
◼
►
fields it totally doesn't count. Like there's many places where it's like A for effort means F for
01:26:47
◼
►
achievement and I'm so used to that as being the default but I just I really like this this
01:26:53
◼
►
different framing of things and that is the part that has stuck with me the most is thinking
01:27:00
◼
►
about trying to rework a journal into my regular life with a series of these questions about
01:27:09
◼
►
like did you try your best to whatever and I don't know I just I that that was the part
01:27:16
◼
►
that really really struck me and I thought it I thought it's just it makes something
01:27:21
◼
►
in my mind clear about these questions and when I've thought about the kinds of things
01:27:25
◼
►
that I would want to change in my own life, I'm very aware that the trying framework
01:27:30
◼
►
is different because it's like, you know, I often go on stretches where I'm stricter
01:27:36
◼
►
or looser with say limiting the carbohydrates in my diet and when I've thought about that
01:27:42
◼
►
for like, oh, I'm trying to reduce carbohydrates in my diet, there's something very different
01:27:47
◼
►
about the decision moments in life,
01:27:51
◼
►
where it's like, oh, maybe I could eat a pizza, right?
01:27:54
◼
►
And there's something different about thinking like,
01:27:56
◼
►
oh, I have failed today to do this thing,
01:28:01
◼
►
versus it feels way worse to think like,
01:28:04
◼
►
if I press a button and a pizza comes to my house,
01:28:06
◼
►
I didn't even try, right?
01:28:09
◼
►
And it's like, oh, that makes me kind of reframe this
01:28:14
◼
►
in a very different way, where it's like,
01:28:16
◼
►
It's somehow weird. It's almost more acceptable to just fail, right?
01:28:20
◼
►
The difference is having a slice of toast is like,
01:28:23
◼
►
"Okay, I didn't do the best I could have done today.
01:28:26
◼
►
Maybe I scored a 7 out of 10."
01:28:29
◼
►
As compared to if it was a binary yes or no,
01:28:33
◼
►
you could eat an entire baguette.
01:28:35
◼
►
Right, right.
01:28:36
◼
►
And it wouldn't matter because you've already failed today,
01:28:39
◼
►
so you may as well fail spectacularly.
01:28:41
◼
►
Yeah, exactly.
01:28:42
◼
►
As opposed to grading yourself on how well did I do
01:28:46
◼
►
"Well, okay, I had a piece of toast, but I only have one piece."
01:28:50
◼
►
As opposed to like, "Well, I just ate the entire loaf because why not?"
01:28:53
◼
►
Right? Like, "I've already failed."
01:28:54
◼
►
Yeah, like, yeah, it avoids a kind of cascade of failures where you feel like,
01:28:57
◼
►
"I haven't done the thing at all, so I might as well really not do it."
01:29:01
◼
►
And so like one of the, just a very, very, like if you're struggling to like conceptualize this,
01:29:08
◼
►
Godsworth gives an example of a very simple question.
01:29:12
◼
►
So, "Did you have a good day?"
01:29:15
◼
►
And that is like a yes or a no. Right? Did I have a good day today? No, I didn't have a good day
01:29:19
◼
►
today. This is very different to what he thinks is a better question, which is what did you do today
01:29:25
◼
►
to make a positive impact? That is very different as a question because you may not have had a good
01:29:31
◼
►
day, but you might have done one thing that was good. So now the day wasn't a complete failure.
01:29:37
◼
►
Yeah, or even just a more simple rephrasing of "did I try to have a good day today?"
01:29:43
◼
►
Immediately changes moments in your life where you feel like you were being grumpy just to be grumpy.
01:29:49
◼
►
You weren't even trying to have a good day. Whereas it's way easier to score it as like,
01:29:55
◼
►
"no, I didn't have a good day at all. I was super grumpy." And I think it really is just a
01:30:01
◼
►
super great reframing of this. But he does suggest, and this is where the journaling
01:30:08
◼
►
comes in, that you're keeping a record over time and that you're checking in at a particular
01:30:13
◼
►
time and seeing how these things are going. And of course, I totally love that just like
01:30:19
◼
►
the section in the beginning, he also acknowledges this is really hard to do. And if you are
01:30:25
◼
►
scoring yourself honestly, he talks again about it's really hard to, at the beginning,
01:30:31
◼
►
the reality that like you claim these things are important, but you're not even trying
01:30:35
◼
►
if you're being honest with the scoring a lot of the times.
01:30:39
◼
►
And again, I just think that's great.
01:30:41
◼
►
And it again, it makes me think of the time tracking where it's like, it's just so brutal
01:30:44
◼
►
to look at when you first begin, but that's kind of the point.
01:30:49
◼
►
And so when you're trying to come up with a list of questions about behavioral changes
01:30:52
◼
►
that you want, like you should totally expect that you're going to have a real brutal list
01:30:58
◼
►
of numbers to look at sometimes.
01:31:00
◼
►
and that's to force you to think about,
01:31:02
◼
►
are you really trying?
01:31:03
◼
►
Is this a thing that you actually want to do right now?
01:31:06
◼
►
Or is this a thing that like,
01:31:07
◼
►
is not really a priority in your life?
01:31:10
◼
►
One of his little anecdotes is he's talking about
01:31:12
◼
►
a discussion with Atul Gawande,
01:31:14
◼
►
who is the author of "The Checklist Manifesto,"
01:31:17
◼
►
which is a book I've talked about before as really liking.
01:31:20
◼
►
The details of the anecdote--
01:31:21
◼
►
- This is hilarious to me.
01:31:23
◼
►
- Like, here's a guy who has written a book on checklists,
01:31:27
◼
►
who is unable to do a simple thing in his life.
01:31:31
◼
►
- It was to sign up for life insurance.
01:31:33
◼
►
- Yeah, that's what it was.
01:31:34
◼
►
Like just to sign up for life insurance.
01:31:36
◼
►
And he just, his question then at the end of the day
01:31:40
◼
►
is like, did you try to set up any kind of life insurance
01:31:44
◼
►
for your family today?
01:31:46
◼
►
And it's like an incredibly successful guy
01:31:49
◼
►
who's a doctor who is a multiple New York Times
01:31:52
◼
►
bestselling author who wrote a book on literal checklists.
01:31:56
◼
►
Like even this guy has things on his mind that he feels like, "Oh, this is super important
01:32:01
◼
►
and I should do," and has to face the grim reality of, "You didn't even try today
01:32:06
◼
►
to do this thing that you claim is so important."
01:32:10
◼
►
And eventually, like he guilt trips himself into doing it.
01:32:13
◼
►
But I just always like to see that kind of thing that it's like even people who are
01:32:17
◼
►
very successful have these kinds of problems.
01:32:20
◼
►
So Atul Gawande says, like there was a quote from him in the book that like, "This system
01:32:25
◼
►
changed his life, right? The thing is, I believe it because he named him, right? Because this
01:32:33
◼
►
is an example of when in other books you would roll your eyes to be like, "Oh, someone who
01:32:38
◼
►
wrote the book on checklists needed your question for his checklist to be able to actually do
01:32:42
◼
►
a thing, but I will believe it because you named the guy, because he can say you were
01:32:48
◼
►
lying." Right? So it's like, this is an example of why I'm willing to like, I'm more willing
01:32:53
◼
►
to believe that this system works because the examples are believable. Because the examples
01:32:58
◼
►
are supposed to show me the system works. So if I believe the examples, I believe that
01:33:02
◼
►
there's value in the system. Now, I really, really liked this engaging questions thing,
01:33:09
◼
►
and I have a problem for it. So I created a small list of questions for myself, but
01:33:12
◼
►
I'm not sure how to integrate them into my journal. It wouldn't work. Like, I don't want
01:33:18
◼
►
to write seven questions out every single day and then score them. So like, I'm trying
01:33:23
◼
►
of find a way to make it make sense for me like maybe I have like a different part of
01:33:28
◼
►
the book where I kind of keep a score maybe in the back or something I haven't worked
01:33:32
◼
►
this out yet but I'm I'm gonna try and I'm willing to share the questions if you were
01:33:36
◼
►
interested to hear them.
01:33:37
◼
►
I am interested to hear them although I'm just I'm curious like if you use some sort
01:33:40
◼
►
of digital paper system you could just I don't want to know template over and over.
01:33:44
◼
►
So this is something I didn't mention earlier you know when you said to me that you were
01:33:46
◼
►
you were really impressed that I kept the journal going like so easily. Part of it is
01:33:51
◼
►
is because I love using my pens and paper.
01:33:54
◼
►
- Right, of course.
01:33:55
◼
►
- Right, so getting to do that every day
01:33:57
◼
►
brings joy to me that doing it on my iPad wouldn't.
01:34:01
◼
►
And so if I want to integrate this into my system,
01:34:04
◼
►
I need to find a practical way of doing it.
01:34:05
◼
►
And I just haven't worked out what that is yet.
01:34:08
◼
►
- No, I understand, I'm just teasing you.
01:34:09
◼
►
- I know you are, I know you are.
01:34:11
◼
►
So let me, I have seven questions so far.
01:34:12
◼
►
- Great copy and pastes.
01:34:14
◼
►
All right, tell me what your questions are.
01:34:16
◼
►
- Okay, did I do my best to be creative today?
01:34:20
◼
►
Did I do my best to advance new ideas today?
01:34:24
◼
►
Did I do my best to make sure revenue is being generated?
01:34:27
◼
►
Did I do my best to make my colleagues feel valued?
01:34:31
◼
►
Did I do my best to do something good for Edina?
01:34:35
◼
►
Did I do my best to engage with my audience?
01:34:38
◼
►
And did I do my best to improve my health?
01:34:42
◼
►
They are my questions so far.
01:34:44
◼
►
Yeah, those are good.
01:34:45
◼
►
Those are good.
01:34:46
◼
►
And I tried to keep them open.
01:34:48
◼
►
I tried to keep them like vague, like the one, did I do my best to make sure
01:34:52
◼
►
revenue is being generated?
01:34:53
◼
►
There are like a bunch of different ways that I can answer that question.
01:34:57
◼
►
And I could have said, did I do my best to make a sale today?
01:35:01
◼
►
That's very different.
01:35:04
◼
►
The revenue one is a way better question.
01:35:06
◼
►
So I thought hard about that one because I wanted to have something in there,
01:35:09
◼
►
Cause I sell podcast sponsorships, but it's not the only way my company can
01:35:13
◼
►
generate revenue.
01:35:13
◼
►
And there are other things that I can do
01:35:16
◼
►
to try and set a basis for doing this
01:35:20
◼
►
as opposed to actually making a sale.
01:35:22
◼
►
And I figured that that would be,
01:35:24
◼
►
for my personal mental health, more important.
01:35:27
◼
►
Because the sales don't happen every day,
01:35:29
◼
►
because they don't need to.
01:35:31
◼
►
They happen, if they happen every week,
01:35:33
◼
►
then we're doing great, right?
01:35:35
◼
►
You could get one sale a week and it's fine.
01:35:37
◼
►
Because they happen in chunks of time.
01:35:41
◼
►
So I wouldn't want to be every single day
01:35:43
◼
►
beating myself up over not signing a contract.
01:35:49
◼
►
The little detail that I like here in the book as well is, while it starts out with
01:35:54
◼
►
that tough love of "guess what, this is going to be really hard" and "guess what,
01:35:58
◼
►
you're going to say things that are important to you, you're going to not even try for
01:36:01
◼
►
a week every day to do them", he immediately goes to this example of like "and guess
01:36:08
◼
►
what, your questions aren't going to be that different from everybody else's questions".
01:36:12
◼
►
"Oh, I loved that!" It's like, "You're going to be a cliché, but there's a reason!"
01:36:16
◼
►
Yeah, he totally says, "You're going to be just like everybody else." To paraphrase
01:36:22
◼
►
it slightly, he says, "Your goals will be plucked from a classic self-improvement menu,
01:36:27
◼
►
the menu we all feast on. Lose weight, get fit, get organised, learn something new, quit
01:36:33
◼
►
a bad habit, save more money, help others, spend more time with family, travel to new
01:36:38
◼
►
fall in love and be less stressed. What's great is he finishes with, because you feel a bit like,
01:36:43
◼
►
oh I guess I'm just like another sheep in this system, but I love that he acknowledges like
01:36:48
◼
►
the fact that other people have similar goals doesn't make those goals less worthy and I feel
01:36:55
◼
►
like that really does free you up to be able to have just like boring anodyne goals and that's
01:37:02
◼
►
fine, right? This is the same goals everybody has and there is nothing wrong with that and I just,
01:37:07
◼
►
I really like that he took a moment to explicitly call that out of like,
01:37:12
◼
►
"Hey, you don't need to be super creative with these questions."
01:37:15
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Like these are the things that as a human race we have agreed upon will make us happy.
01:37:19
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Yeah, this is the stuff that everybody wants to do and there's a reason for it.
01:37:22
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So I just, but I really like that little moment just to be like,
01:37:25
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"Don't worry, you don't need to be super fancy with your 'did I generate revenue today' right?"
01:37:30
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It's like, whatever, you want to lose weight?
01:37:32
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Welcome to the Western world.
01:37:34
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It's fine, it's perfectly fine to have as a goal.
01:37:37
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There was one last part I wanted to touch on with this book, which happens before the
01:37:41
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questions. So the questions are about creating a system of accountability, right? That's
01:37:46
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what you do. You create these questions and then if you want to make your change, you
01:37:49
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have to answer the questions and you're accountable to the questions, right? But before that,
01:37:54
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he talks about like why we need this type of system and it's because as humans, we
01:38:00
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are superior planners and inferior doers. So like saying that each individual is both
01:38:06
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a leader and a follower. In the morning, at the beginning of our day, the leader is ready
01:38:11
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for action, setting out our tasks and believing, "This is the stuff I want to do today, and
01:38:17
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I'm going to achieve all of it." Then you hand over to the follower part of yourself,
01:38:22
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who has to then execute on the leader's plan. And that doesn't work out, because we get
01:38:28
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tired or we get distracted. It is in the same way that if you have anybody work for you,
01:38:34
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You may ask them to do a task, but it doesn't get completed.
01:38:38
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You do that to yourself every single day.
01:38:43
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And this was like one of the most genius things I've ever heard in business training is the
01:38:48
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systems of leadership and motivation that we learn to try and motivate and lead other
01:38:53
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people, you have to do to yourself.
01:38:57
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And this opened my mind.
01:39:01
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That is genius, right?
01:39:03
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learn all of these things about leadership styles and mentorship styles and like how
01:39:09
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to motivate and engage people but we never think about the fact that you also have to
01:39:14
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do it to yourself because you rely on yourself to do work every day and I was like oh my
01:39:20
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god that is genius. I loved it.
01:39:24
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Yeah it's a really great part of the book and it also goes to that idea of like not
01:39:29
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being a consistent self that you react differently in these different environments, but also
01:39:35
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the again, I love how he points out like, how many times have you successfully implemented
01:39:41
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the plan the morning you had? It's like, wow, I can count those numbers of days like on
01:39:45
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one hand, because morning you is always way optimistic about what can actually occur.
01:39:52
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And it's like, oh, 2 p.m. you is real sleepy.
01:39:56
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I just, I think it is a great framing.
01:39:59
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It's a great way to be aware of things.
01:40:03
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And I like it on both ends where he's trying to tamp down
01:40:06
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planning you's desires and trying to do the thing.
01:40:12
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Like you set up things for the you
01:40:17
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who is going to be lazier in the future.
01:40:20
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Right, and you try to make it easy for that guy
01:40:23
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and that guy's gonna need some serious management help.
01:40:26
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And for morning you, he has a hard time recognizing that.
01:40:31
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And I do like that he just really calls out
01:40:33
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that part of your plan about any kind of behavior change
01:40:36
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has to include the easy to forget fact
01:40:40
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that in the future, you will not be as motivated
01:40:43
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as you currently are.
01:40:45
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And you have to take that into account.
01:40:49
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And I just, I think it's such, it's such an obvious,
01:40:51
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like so many of these points,
01:40:52
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like some of them are, they're very obvious,
01:40:55
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but it's great to draw that in, to be like,
01:40:58
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you need to explicitly think about this.
01:41:01
◼
►
- All business book stuff is obvious once you hear it,
01:41:04
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but it's about the way they codify it.
01:41:07
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Like that's what's, so like another great example
01:41:09
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►
is saying about weather forecasting.
01:41:13
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Like people that care about the weather,
01:41:15
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check the weather constantly and adjust their days to match.
01:41:19
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It's like, why don't we do that for ourselves
01:41:22
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in our tasks and motivations for the day?
01:41:24
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Like, you set out with an idea in the daytime,
01:41:27
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but you're keeping track of what is going on
01:41:29
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and adjusting on the fly to deal with that.
01:41:32
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And it's like, all of this stuff is just like,
01:41:34
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this is a really good book.
01:41:36
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This is a very good book.
01:41:38
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I like it a lot.
01:41:40
◼
►
- There's many, many more points in the book we could cover,
01:41:43
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►
but I really think that this is a book
01:41:44
◼
►
This is a book that has a lot in it and there's like a bunch of things that I would,
01:41:47
◼
►
I highlighted because I feel like, Ooh, this really,
01:41:49
◼
►
this really speaks to me in my particular situation,
01:41:52
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but might not be interesting in a general conversation.
01:41:55
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But he made one point that again is so obvious,
01:42:00
◼
►
but to hear someone just talk about it in a clear way is like, you know,
01:42:04
◼
►
it's an excellent point.
01:42:05
◼
►
And one of the things he talks about is activities that have a certain kind of
01:42:11
◼
►
And he just talked about being aware that whatever you're doing,
01:42:14
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►
it's often very hard to stop doing that thing.
01:42:18
◼
►
And so it's like, Oh, hey, you sit down to watch a little bit of Netflix.
01:42:23
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►
And nobody watches a little bit of Netflix. Right.
01:42:27
◼
►
And it just,
01:42:28
◼
►
it made me think about like one of these pieces of productivity advice that I've
01:42:31
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always thought, like, is there a human on earth who can do this?
01:42:34
◼
►
Because it's not me. You'll hear people say things like,
01:42:36
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►
why don't you work for a little while? And then you give yourself a break,
01:42:39
◼
►
a nice reward and you spend 10 minutes on social media and then you go right back to
01:42:44
◼
►
work and you know it's a reward for having to like does anybody do that is there anybody
01:42:49
◼
►
on the face of the earth who's like i'll just boot up mario kart for 10 minutes just play
01:42:53
◼
►
a couple races and then i'll get right back into that important work i was doing like
01:42:57
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►
nobody does that and so he talked about this this idea of inertia and there's something
01:43:06
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►
that's been creeping up in my mind, which he doesn't talk about, but like, I've
01:43:13
◼
►
started to think about the flip side of that because I was thinking like, wait a
01:43:16
◼
►
minute, there are a bunch of activities that aren't this way.
01:43:19
◼
►
Things like exercise, right?
01:43:23
◼
►
Or things like writing a script or certain kinds of very intense work.
01:43:31
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►
I feel like I've come to recognize this category of things that I'm thinking of
01:43:35
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►
as self terminating activities.
01:43:38
◼
►
I really think that there's an importance in recognizing
01:43:44
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►
that there are a lot of things
01:43:45
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►
that are self terminating activities
01:43:48
◼
►
versus the stuff that he's talking about,
01:43:51
◼
►
like inertial activities.
01:43:54
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►
And I feel like this is,
01:43:56
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►
I haven't quite settled my thoughts on this entirely,
01:44:00
◼
►
but there's something here about gaining an understanding
01:44:04
◼
►
of the distinction between these two things.
01:44:06
◼
►
And that in general, self-terminating activities
01:44:10
◼
►
are things that you'd rather spend your time on
01:44:14
◼
►
than inertial activities where you can just do them forever.
01:44:18
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►
That there's, I don't know,
01:44:20
◼
►
I wish I could explain this better in my head,
01:44:25
◼
►
but it's just something that has been on my mind
01:44:27
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►
since I first read the book is this thought of like,
01:44:30
◼
►
things worth doing are self-terminating.
01:44:34
◼
►
and things that are enjoyable, but maybe less worthy in a way,
01:44:39
◼
►
have this inertial quality that he talks about
01:44:42
◼
►
that you just want to keep doing them for forever.
01:44:45
◼
►
And it's just a thing that struck me,
01:44:47
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►
and I'm gonna again recommend the book pretty highly
01:44:51
◼
►
'cause I feel like there's a lot in here
01:44:54
◼
►
that even if some of it doesn't seem to resonate at all,
01:44:56
◼
►
I think that almost everybody will find something
01:44:59
◼
►
that you feel like sticks with you
01:45:02
◼
►
after you've read the book.
01:45:03
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►
Yeah, I recommend it. I really do recommend it. This is a good pick. There's a lot of
01:45:08
◼
►
interesting stuff in there, as we've said. It's not a big book. I recommend going to
01:45:13
◼
►
it. There's a bunch of still really practical things we've not even touched on.
01:45:18
◼
►
Yeah, there's a lot we haven't touched on.
01:45:21
◼
►
I think people could get a lot from this, so I recommend it. So again, it's Triggers
01:45:24
◼
►
by Marshall Goldsmith. It's a very, very good book. Before we go, cortexmerch.com. Cortexmerch.com.
01:45:31
◼
►
there buy merch at cortexmerch.com.