Ep. 30: "Cement Gravy Boat of Suffering"
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hello hi John
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I'm Merlin how's it going earlier man
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you were stick on the last one you'll
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I don't know what's up to use your call
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what's your side right that's yours
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that's your side which you mad if I did
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it again go ahead we get sick of you
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tell me already
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yep John ah haha see i think it's
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working you if you like it
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getting grow you you grumbled a lot of
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him he didn't have a shady i really
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liked your performance of that one you
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know why i invested I iphone get em i
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penetrated that performance when you
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invest yourself in something really do
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go all the way that's when trouble
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starts the investment that hurts when
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you invest in yourself in baking bacon
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thank you that changed everybody's life
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you know I'm like I'm like a lady when
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you come to our house
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mm I really you just made myself clear i
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am i'm like a lady I mean my wife's like
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a lady all the time where she wants you
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to be comfortable I don't know why she
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cares so much about you being
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comfortable but we go shopping for you
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we bought you told i told you what my
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daughter said we were the day before you
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arrive for your last visit here it's
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been long enough we can talk about this
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we went to the lucky formerly from
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albertsons and we filled a grocery cart
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with food in anticipation now it's not
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that you're always gonna eat or drink
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everything we get but we have learned
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right it is it pays to prepare sure you
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want to have a full selection of
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different fruity juices
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well you know yes busy waters busy wires
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we want you to have enough flexibility
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that you could make at least three kinds
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of fruity pleasers you have your
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choosing and may I share this with you
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may share with our audience what I said
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to my daughter please
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ok my daughters in the car were rolling
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along she's either goldfish crackers and
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she says daddy why are we buying so much
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stuff huh
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and I said because we love uncle john
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and and anytime that ugly John is not
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talking he's eating and then she went
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back to your goldfish cracker she find
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in here the end
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I didn't really care yeah just think it
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was next thing that she wants it was
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much more confusing to me why you had
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covered everything in your house with
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saran wrap
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yeah well development Italy we bought we
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bought a kind of it's actually a dowel
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Polly plastic i think it's called a look
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at the invoice but it's it's a very
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imagine an industrial-grade saran wrap
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like it's rated for people from alaska
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right because you knew i had a silicon
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allergy seem like a lady
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I much like a lady and physical don't
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make John coffee anymore than he has to
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well you know you are one of those men
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who has embraced the idea that being a
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modern man means being sensitive to
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other people
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you pussy I wasn't a pussy okay thank
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you i was gonna say you know considerate
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vagina haha well you know what it is I
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always so looking forward I'm one of
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those guys who's practicing the older
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style of being a man which is to be
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unaware of other people which is hoping
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but not trying that hard to not have
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things fall on the floor like hoping no
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one sees it but not going nuts to make
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sure you know if I'm eating something
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and it falls and something a bit of it
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falls on the floor i do i'm a very
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considerate person that I put my foot on
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it right away so you don't even you
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don't have to think about tonight we're
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gonna play a game called one of us
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doesn't get a cutlet haha it's going to
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be musical cutlets but no I like that
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about you your of Europe you're still
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having trouble closing the door when you
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urinate which is not trouble it's just
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that my daughter and my daughter needs
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to see that you know what I don't want
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to I don't want to talk too much about
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your house no one of those bathroom
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doors that if you close it ninety-eight
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percent of the ways it appears to it
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appears to be closed or it appears to be
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98% loans which is about as much as i
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want to close the bathroom door i know i
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said if I accept your policy i'm sorry i
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totally services standing at you're
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doing something else you don't think
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about doors your standard the toilet and
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then the door starts to just on its own
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swing open and then you're you're right
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at the point in a urination where you're
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fully you're fully committed
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20-year old man could stop and close the
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door but that's gonna be that could be
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you could be we can bet for you you know
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yeah it's a I haven't been doing my
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Kegel exercises and I and then when you
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hear the doorknob slam into the wall and
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you turn around and they're just there
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in front of God and everybody is in your
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old hood and iron man come back but your
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little four-year-old with an iron man
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comic and some goldfish crackers going
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what am I seeing what ru because all
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because of Eleanor when Uncle John is
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not eating or talking he's urinating
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prodigiously here
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okay I think our house might have once
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been owned by German expressionist
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because there's parts of it to feel a
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little bit cabinet of dr. Caligari there
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are a lot of non right angles that are
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very subtle and I don't like you're
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going to Mystery House is out of the
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what is it the is that was a Remington
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who's the gun people
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yeah the remington mystery house i'm
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pretty sure that's where they can wait
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winchester Winchester Mystery House
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right thinking about the cult mystery
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height I think you're thinking about
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oh my god of wonders it's the
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Kalashnikov condo that you're thinking
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yeah yeah maybe they're jumping they're
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johnnytravel I across this great country
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at this great planet of ours have you
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ever been to the Winchester Mystery
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House i have been to the Winchester
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Mystery House and I've I've looked up
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the staircases to nowhere and gone into
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the rooms of many mysteries but opened
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the doors that lead to other doors
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um I was nonplussed who I felt like they
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were not either there were not enough
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mysteries in the Winchester Mystery
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House or we weren't being you're being
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allowed into all the mysteries you know
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history's in the Winchester Mystery
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House that we had not paid the higher
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admission price to see i see didn't get
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to see the gun's probably know it's like
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when you go to various I you you get you
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can pay the small you can play the
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normal fee
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yeah they called lehand mirror with
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shelby said that once you walk around
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mm you did you do a little bit of
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Griswold as you walk through the places
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but uh but then there's the then you can
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pay the exorbitant fee
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huh and they let you like they let you
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have sex and Louis quatorze is
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bed and you can you can actually take it
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take a shit behind the curtains like
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they used to do in the old days that
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right yeah you can really have the full
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versi experience I think you know
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there's a lot of secrets secret places
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like that that disney world there's a
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there's a place there's a honeymoon
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suite inside of Cinderella's castle now
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so you can go up there and yeah yeah if
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you you know getting married at disney
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world Sean I don't know if you'll ever
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get married because I just ask you
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please literally to never get married at
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disney world there are ppl shagging in
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Cinderella's castle yeah people try to
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enjoy like I like Mickey Mouse popsicle
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under somebody up there like that was
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just trying to enjoy a Mickey Mouse
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obstacle can I just kind of make one
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very small point here there's probably
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not a lot of straight men in the world
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who are thinking finally I get to sleep
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in Cinderella's castle
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I'm thinking there's a lot of trade-offs
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to that I'm thinking maybe he's banging
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her in the behind for the first time
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because she's in fucking Cinderella's
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Wow no no your I'm saying quid pro
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Colonel he's getting his reward these
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keys to be Prince Charming right and who
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and what better way to be prince
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charming fantasy literature the get
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nothing but he's a slipper but the yum
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now is your chance that our listeners
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are not familiar with the mysteries of
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the Winchester Mystery House because
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it's kind of an interesting story don't
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you know we we have we have listeners
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all around the world their listeners in
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Germany and hungry or Sweden sweet up
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all of all of us can do via there are
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people listening what about Romania
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everybody from Romania no i don't i have
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i do not i'm not aware of anyone in
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Romania most politics jonathan from the
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politics listening I'm sure that right
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now in Latvia there's someone who has a
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german friend that turned him on to this
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podcast and they're sitting in here
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sitting up there in their artists carrot
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in 58 correctly signal with a very small
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speaker he still has me doing and maybe
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that's a fact okay and we know in Africa
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that they probably don't because they're
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using all the available space for water
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i'm going to guess i'm gonna guess that
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there are people in Africa listening but
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I i'm going to suspect that they are in
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there working
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for an NGO there in the Peace Corps and
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we're probably literally the only source
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of sanity in America that they have yeah
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right every every week they they go into
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their little inner sanctum that they
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made out of 5 gallon gas cans and just
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stacked up five-gallon gas cans in a
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square and put a roof on it and they go
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in there and they say take me to America
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water on the line take me back to
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America but in that case in that case I
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think it would be self-involved for us
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not to show this is the first of all
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hello and welcome Bienvenu they'll come
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into all of our friends overseas you're
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enjoying this a common except for the
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Germans all of you are welcome now
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believe
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excuse me I'm sorry was that it was
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announced to believe now that said the
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dutch word that means please and thank
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you can bet you literally not get me
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started on the Dutch ok so also glue so
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thank you first of all I hope that I
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hope that you're very cozy but well
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ventilated an insight of your various
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drums and buckets was a great XTC record
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by the way um social drums and buckets
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just lucky that's Chris Wallace
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production style is that right now huh
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[Music]
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15 gallons of a paint or their liquid
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you're about to explain the remington
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mystery house that's right the requested
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the cult the cult mystery sidearm it's
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that there's a house somewhere south of
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◼
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san francisco which in which is yes then
[TS]
00:10:19
◼
►
way san jose is that right
[TS]
00:10:21
◼
►
it's in one of those places in in
[TS]
00:10:24
◼
►
California where all the freeways
[TS]
00:10:26
◼
►
intersect you know later Brandon said no
[TS]
00:10:29
◼
►
one is obligated to appreciate cities
[TS]
00:10:31
◼
►
outside of San Francisco not during
[TS]
00:10:33
◼
►
their lifetime
[TS]
00:10:33
◼
►
that's how we look at everything it's
[TS]
00:10:34
◼
►
like the people in New York and New
[TS]
00:10:36
◼
►
Yorker cover of account New Yorker see
[TS]
00:10:37
◼
►
the rest of the United States yeah river
[TS]
00:10:40
◼
►
and then Pacific Ocean and then
[TS]
00:10:42
◼
►
something something police
[TS]
00:10:44
◼
►
yeah so there was a famous manufacturer
[TS]
00:10:47
◼
►
of firearms who would you call him a
[TS]
00:10:49
◼
►
barren wasn't Winchester kind of a baron
[TS]
00:10:51
◼
►
i would say that he was at firearms
[TS]
00:10:53
◼
►
Baron he was not a baron in the sense of
[TS]
00:10:55
◼
►
being a member of the European
[TS]
00:10:57
◼
►
aristocracy being unable to have
[TS]
00:10:59
◼
►
children
[TS]
00:11:00
◼
►
he was not barren like I'm sure that
[TS]
00:11:03
◼
►
his article definitely an article in
[TS]
00:11:05
◼
►
front of their mr. Winchester's womb was
[TS]
00:11:07
◼
►
very was a was a week on the Kennedy
[TS]
00:11:10
◼
►
right there was a rocky place for my
[TS]
00:11:12
◼
►
seat could find no purchase so anyway
[TS]
00:11:14
◼
►
mr. Winchester had a lot of people
[TS]
00:11:16
◼
►
killed with his with his otherwise
[TS]
00:11:18
◼
►
that's a weird kind of sorry sorry he
[TS]
00:11:21
◼
►
had a lot of people very happy them kill
[TS]
00:11:23
◼
►
property protected my own stories don't
[TS]
00:11:26
◼
►
kill people know now clichés kill
[TS]
00:11:29
◼
►
yeah so he made guns and he eventually
[TS]
00:11:31
◼
►
died he had no I had no way of knowing
[TS]
00:11:34
◼
►
how those guns were going to be and this
[TS]
00:11:35
◼
►
could be used to prop open doors to let
[TS]
00:11:38
◼
►
us have done
[TS]
00:11:39
◼
►
yeah circle back to that ok so what did
[TS]
00:11:42
◼
►
your writing things down now I'm not a
[TS]
00:11:43
◼
►
fake scribbling i'll send it to you send
[TS]
00:11:45
◼
►
you pictures I'm acting like I'm writing
[TS]
00:11:46
◼
►
stop talking about this
[TS]
00:11:47
◼
►
the now hehe had yet many of money like
[TS]
00:11:50
◼
►
Jesus it wasn't rich like hell you know
[TS]
00:11:52
◼
►
Jesus very popular belief Jesus was not
[TS]
00:11:57
◼
►
a wealthy man
[TS]
00:11:58
◼
►
ok please continue but don't you think
[TS]
00:12:01
◼
►
that he you know what he wasn't as
[TS]
00:12:04
◼
►
Richard believe with Randolph Hearst but
[TS]
00:12:06
◼
►
he was a rich man from having made the
[TS]
00:12:08
◼
►
guns that kill the Indian Jesus did that
[TS]
00:12:11
◼
►
yeah jesus killed the Indians who has a
[TS]
00:12:14
◼
►
way of paving the way for the Mormon
[TS]
00:12:15
◼
►
became an african-american know the
[TS]
00:12:19
◼
►
Winchester rifles were a key to opening
[TS]
00:12:21
◼
►
the west which is a euphemism one bullet
[TS]
00:12:24
◼
►
all it's not after the euphemism for
[TS]
00:12:26
◼
►
killing Buffalo and made of Americans
[TS]
00:12:28
◼
►
yes those were 21 great guns with that
[TS]
00:12:31
◼
►
he did go great comes with that and a
[TS]
00:12:35
◼
►
big house he built himself a house and
[TS]
00:12:37
◼
►
look this up on wiki I'm gonna wing it
[TS]
00:12:38
◼
►
but when he passed away and left a very
[TS]
00:12:41
◼
►
large fortune and I I forgive me if I
[TS]
00:12:43
◼
►
get this wrong but I believe the story
[TS]
00:12:44
◼
►
goes that mrs. Winchester something
[TS]
00:12:47
◼
►
something was very interested in mediums
[TS]
00:12:49
◼
►
or media and somebody talk to her and
[TS]
00:12:51
◼
►
some of the point is that she was in a
[TS]
00:12:53
◼
►
position in her life where she was
[TS]
00:12:56
◼
►
receptive to the idea that if she ever
[TS]
00:12:58
◼
►
stop completing the Winchester mansion
[TS]
00:13:01
◼
►
something bad would happen
[TS]
00:13:03
◼
►
oh I think what it was was that she felt
[TS]
00:13:05
◼
►
that the that the souls of all the
[TS]
00:13:08
◼
►
people that had been killed by her
[TS]
00:13:10
◼
►
husband's rifles were a haunting her
[TS]
00:13:14
◼
►
chasing right perhaps
[TS]
00:13:16
◼
►
learn what it was awesome delusion is
[TS]
00:13:19
◼
►
associate delusion it so it's amazing
[TS]
00:13:21
◼
►
and she had the money to build this
[TS]
00:13:23
◼
►
house in with all these false stairways
[TS]
00:13:26
◼
►
that went up to no plans but that's the
[TS]
00:13:27
◼
►
thing she ran out of real stuff to build
[TS]
00:13:29
◼
►
and then she was like she's like the
[TS]
00:13:30
◼
►
ultimate like kind of person i tried to
[TS]
00:13:32
◼
►
help she's like the ultimate
[TS]
00:13:33
◼
►
procrastinator like crazy person she's
[TS]
00:13:35
◼
►
nothing useful to do anymore but lots of
[TS]
00:13:37
◼
►
money and time and so she had workers I
[TS]
00:13:39
◼
►
think I don't say around the clock but i
[TS]
00:13:41
◼
►
believe around the clock like building
[TS]
00:13:43
◼
►
whatever including now go ahead with
[TS]
00:13:45
◼
►
lots of things building whatever in
[TS]
00:13:47
◼
►
order to fool the ghosts that were
[TS]
00:13:51
◼
►
walking around the house looking for her
[TS]
00:13:53
◼
►
so the ghosts are like trying doors and
[TS]
00:13:55
◼
►
going upstairs and all this door leads
[TS]
00:13:58
◼
►
nowhere and the dog shakes its ghostly
[TS]
00:14:00
◼
►
fists are a gesture
[TS]
00:14:03
◼
►
I'll first I get killed by a rifle and
[TS]
00:14:06
◼
►
now I find steps to come nowhere and so
[TS]
00:14:08
◼
►
she's living I'm sure she was living in
[TS]
00:14:10
◼
►
like like most old ladies she was living
[TS]
00:14:12
◼
►
in one room with a hot plate cats and
[TS]
00:14:14
◼
►
cats goes without saying she was
[TS]
00:14:17
◼
►
watching her stories some in a room off
[TS]
00:14:19
◼
►
the kitchen x-files dvds and this and
[TS]
00:14:23
◼
►
this house that went for 15 blocks as
[TS]
00:14:26
◼
►
full of ghosts all wandering around
[TS]
00:14:28
◼
►
going like have you did you go up that
[TS]
00:14:30
◼
►
staircase there doesn't go anywhere
[TS]
00:14:32
◼
►
ah their doorways that would open and
[TS]
00:14:34
◼
►
there'll be nothing on the other side
[TS]
00:14:35
◼
►
would like you know sort of like
[TS]
00:14:36
◼
►
something like from monty python you
[TS]
00:14:38
◼
►
open the door there's your outside
[TS]
00:14:39
◼
►
there's nothing you step off and you die
[TS]
00:14:40
◼
►
but they were deliberate subterfuge
[TS]
00:14:42
◼
►
we're also things with maybe like steps
[TS]
00:14:44
◼
►
that go up into nothing as you say
[TS]
00:14:46
◼
►
ya know it sounds like your experience
[TS]
00:14:48
◼
►
there was one in which you you having a
[TS]
00:14:51
◼
►
limited level of engagement there wasn't
[TS]
00:14:52
◼
►
a lot there to catch your attention but
[TS]
00:14:54
◼
►
I if I if you don't mind my asking again
[TS]
00:14:56
◼
►
we can literally cut this out of its a
[TS]
00:14:57
◼
►
problem you must have in some ways been
[TS]
00:15:00
◼
►
like all the other things we cut out of
[TS]
00:15:01
◼
►
this podcast i just can't even done
[TS]
00:15:03
◼
►
don't let me start with how many things
[TS]
00:15:04
◼
►
that come out of this podcast there's
[TS]
00:15:05
◼
►
like three things I've cut out of this
[TS]
00:15:06
◼
►
podcast that's how it gets so good as i
[TS]
00:15:09
◼
►
take anything it's not really really
[TS]
00:15:10
◼
►
really good that you've taken out all
[TS]
00:15:12
◼
►
three instances where you said nigger
[TS]
00:15:13
◼
►
nigger nigger
[TS]
00:15:14
◼
►
oh yeah well like that nine of them had
[TS]
00:15:16
◼
►
to take them all out
[TS]
00:15:17
◼
►
yeah well here's what happened i went to
[TS]
00:15:20
◼
►
visit the Winchester a mystery house yes
[TS]
00:15:22
◼
►
in the seventies who during the nineteen
[TS]
00:15:26
◼
►
seventies when I was a she's long dead
[TS]
00:15:28
◼
►
at this
[TS]
00:15:29
◼
►
point obviously she's choose a dead lady
[TS]
00:15:30
◼
►
now and when this is a house that you
[TS]
00:15:32
◼
►
pay three dollars to go visit but this
[TS]
00:15:35
◼
►
was during the era
[TS]
00:15:36
◼
►
I don't have to tell you about the
[TS]
00:15:37
◼
►
seventies now this was during the era
[TS]
00:15:40
◼
►
that that the Bermuda Triangle was a
[TS]
00:15:45
◼
►
really big deal in search of that's
[TS]
00:15:47
◼
►
right and it was the era when Bigfoot
[TS]
00:15:49
◼
►
was a really big deal and project
[TS]
00:15:52
◼
►
Bluebook Loch Ness monster Loch Ness
[TS]
00:15:54
◼
►
monster these were there was a there
[TS]
00:15:56
◼
►
there were a lot of supernatural
[TS]
00:15:58
◼
►
instances supernatural events in the
[TS]
00:16:00
◼
►
seventies that would you know that
[TS]
00:16:04
◼
►
captured the imagination of young boys
[TS]
00:16:06
◼
►
all across America so when I went to the
[TS]
00:16:08
◼
►
Winchester Mystery House and was told
[TS]
00:16:10
◼
►
that it had many many secret passages to
[TS]
00:16:13
◼
►
fool all of the ghosts of the American
[TS]
00:16:16
◼
►
Indians that talk like Mel Brooks dole
[TS]
00:16:20
◼
►
cheese they uh I you know I went into
[TS]
00:16:25
◼
►
this place thinking that I was gonna get
[TS]
00:16:27
◼
►
spooked I was gonna have some haunting
[TS]
00:16:29
◼
►
happening but there was some girl from
[TS]
00:16:32
◼
►
from Stanford wearing a like a a vest
[TS]
00:16:36
◼
►
like somebody who worked at home depot
[TS]
00:16:37
◼
►
but it was guiding us around this place
[TS]
00:16:41
◼
►
pointing out all the you know look this
[TS]
00:16:43
◼
►
is a doorknob
[TS]
00:16:44
◼
►
but there's no door it's just a doorknob
[TS]
00:16:46
◼
►
in a wall but and I was like that's
[TS]
00:16:48
◼
►
going to fool a ghost by three dollars
[TS]
00:16:52
◼
►
tak hai that's not going to fool a ghost
[TS]
00:16:54
◼
►
and this is why i asked John this is he
[TS]
00:16:56
◼
►
this is the thing and you're a man who
[TS]
00:16:59
◼
►
actually put this you're a man with a
[TS]
00:17:02
◼
►
very active mind and you can imagine the
[TS]
00:17:04
◼
►
world's right you were there you seen
[TS]
00:17:07
◼
►
that what is that the the sea beams at
[TS]
00:17:09
◼
►
the tensor case you've been there you
[TS]
00:17:11
◼
►
see all of this right watched attack
[TS]
00:17:13
◼
►
ships Bruce you seen it all over Ryan
[TS]
00:17:15
◼
►
yeah you seen it on then that's good
[TS]
00:17:18
◼
►
that's gotta be one of the greatest
[TS]
00:17:19
◼
►
monologue of all types amazing
[TS]
00:17:20
◼
►
here's the thing in retrospect in as
[TS]
00:17:22
◼
►
much as you can share and I will
[TS]
00:17:23
◼
►
literally cut this out if it's a problem
[TS]
00:17:25
◼
►
if you hypothetically were a person who
[TS]
00:17:28
◼
►
were consumers concerned about ghosts
[TS]
00:17:30
◼
►
especially in their home is that the
[TS]
00:17:33
◼
►
kind of strategy that you would have
[TS]
00:17:34
◼
►
taken what you put doorknobs in a while
[TS]
00:17:35
◼
►
would you made a stairway to nowhere
[TS]
00:17:37
◼
►
well here's the thing
[TS]
00:17:40
◼
►
although i do not have a lot of uh you
[TS]
00:17:43
◼
►
know I I'm a science minded person you
[TS]
00:17:45
◼
►
know who that I have bomb i have a weak
[TS]
00:17:50
◼
►
I have an Achilles heel one of my many
[TS]
00:17:52
◼
►
heels that are kill I is that I get
[TS]
00:17:56
◼
►
spooked by ghosts and that sometimes my
[TS]
00:18:00
◼
►
pillows turn towels and occasionally
[TS]
00:18:03
◼
►
when i'm home alone if i'm watching a
[TS]
00:18:05
◼
►
television program about aliens grabbing
[TS]
00:18:08
◼
►
people off of a desert road i can become
[TS]
00:18:11
◼
►
convinced that the aliens are also on
[TS]
00:18:13
◼
►
the roof of my house waiting for me to
[TS]
00:18:16
◼
►
go to sleep I don't know why this is I
[TS]
00:18:18
◼
►
don't know why I made this way it's a
[TS]
00:18:19
◼
►
zombies the seat is there
[TS]
00:18:21
◼
►
yeah right exactly the seat is there and
[TS]
00:18:23
◼
►
I have spent many a sleepless night in a
[TS]
00:18:26
◼
►
strange house uh being spooked by being
[TS]
00:18:32
◼
►
haunted by by hans and when I want about
[TS]
00:18:35
◼
►
my house I may have told you this when i
[TS]
00:18:37
◼
►
bought my house I i walked through and
[TS]
00:18:39
◼
►
laid down in every room in the house was
[TS]
00:18:43
◼
►
empty before I before I signed the deed
[TS]
00:18:44
◼
►
laid my head down in every corner and
[TS]
00:18:48
◼
►
just close my eyes and was quiet and
[TS]
00:18:51
◼
►
said are there any spooks hear anyone
[TS]
00:18:56
◼
►
spooky did you say it aloud sure and I
[TS]
00:19:02
◼
►
was convinced that there were no spooks
[TS]
00:19:04
◼
►
in my house that all i got back from the
[TS]
00:19:06
◼
►
universe where good vibes and in fact I
[TS]
00:19:09
◼
►
learned later that that the that an old
[TS]
00:19:11
◼
►
man died in my house of old Moses and
[TS]
00:19:15
◼
►
and because i had gone around the house
[TS]
00:19:18
◼
►
and had checked out that there were no
[TS]
00:19:19
◼
►
spooks here I was fine with the fact
[TS]
00:19:21
◼
►
that someone had died here because it he
[TS]
00:19:24
◼
►
clearly died peacefully and well don't
[TS]
00:19:27
◼
►
know there's not that many better ways
[TS]
00:19:28
◼
►
to die than old- died of old missing
[TS]
00:19:31
◼
►
your own you can do a lot worse you
[TS]
00:19:33
◼
►
could die of something besides oldest
[TS]
00:19:35
◼
►
outside the house right right yeah so
[TS]
00:19:37
◼
►
you're not going to haunt a place where
[TS]
00:19:39
◼
►
you died of baldness from from being
[TS]
00:19:42
◼
►
you might bring fresh fruit you are
[TS]
00:19:44
◼
►
going to make sure that the lawn is
[TS]
00:19:46
◼
►
green who you're going to make sure that
[TS]
00:19:49
◼
►
the bet the birds are saying so and i
[TS]
00:19:52
◼
►
only want my mom bought her house in 15
[TS]
00:19:54
◼
►
years ago I did the exact same thing I
[TS]
00:19:57
◼
►
went and laid down in all the corners
[TS]
00:19:58
◼
►
and I said and he spooks here
[TS]
00:20:02
◼
►
anyone got a problem anyone have
[TS]
00:20:04
◼
►
something I'd like to say before I
[TS]
00:20:06
◼
►
commit to being here and it was a spook
[TS]
00:20:10
◼
►
free house and I went to my mom and I
[TS]
00:20:12
◼
►
said I think you can safely buy this
[TS]
00:20:13
◼
►
house and what was her response be no I
[TS]
00:20:18
◼
►
didn't tell her that I can always hold
[TS]
00:20:19
◼
►
it with your mind i said no i haven't
[TS]
00:20:22
◼
►
told her with my mouth but I didn't tell
[TS]
00:20:24
◼
►
her what i had done I said I'm gonna go
[TS]
00:20:26
◼
►
take a look at this house and let me
[TS]
00:20:27
◼
►
know you walking around with a tool belt
[TS]
00:20:29
◼
►
and Stanley outstanding major in a stud
[TS]
00:20:32
◼
►
yeah and then lay down and listen for
[TS]
00:20:33
◼
►
ghost came back and your wife some
[TS]
00:20:36
◼
►
drywall off of your coveralls and said
[TS]
00:20:38
◼
►
it's okay mom
[TS]
00:20:39
◼
►
yeah I went down and check the pipes i
[TS]
00:20:40
◼
►
rattled the furnace it jiggle the toilet
[TS]
00:20:44
◼
►
a little bit that's the technical term
[TS]
00:20:46
◼
►
ego rattling furnace yeah always that's
[TS]
00:20:48
◼
►
a GD rattling yeah you go down around
[TS]
00:20:50
◼
►
the furnace and then if it's everything
[TS]
00:20:52
◼
►
just a certain way it should sound your
[TS]
00:20:53
◼
►
rattle it should be no rattles around
[TS]
00:20:55
◼
►
which it should rattle you want to put a
[TS]
00:20:58
◼
►
little bit of play in that battle the
[TS]
00:20:59
◼
►
furnace and rattles you know it sounds
[TS]
00:21:01
◼
►
like I should check that I think we
[TS]
00:21:02
◼
►
might have to tighten first we have a
[TS]
00:21:04
◼
►
tight furnace will go round with anybody
[TS]
00:21:06
◼
►
spooks get out
[TS]
00:21:08
◼
►
so anyway anything you working on that
[TS]
00:21:10
◼
►
house a lot like you spent a lot of time
[TS]
00:21:12
◼
►
with you know what to tell you but you
[TS]
00:21:13
◼
►
you've yeah yeah and learns to later how
[TS]
00:21:15
◼
►
much you and your mom did to that place
[TS]
00:21:17
◼
►
it's a beautiful house we got to the
[TS]
00:21:18
◼
►
house and we built it but i think that
[TS]
00:21:20
◼
►
you can get a house that's full of
[TS]
00:21:22
◼
►
Spooks and you're not going to get the
[TS]
00:21:23
◼
►
spooks out of there and then there's a
[TS]
00:21:25
◼
►
load-bearing spoofs yeah exactly exactly
[TS]
00:21:29
◼
►
you're the look you don't want to move a
[TS]
00:21:30
◼
►
load-bearing spook if it's it's the only
[TS]
00:21:32
◼
►
thing that's holding the roof up that's
[TS]
00:21:34
◼
►
so in any case my house my mom's house
[TS]
00:21:37
◼
►
both spook free abodes and we have lived
[TS]
00:21:40
◼
►
here in our respective homes for many
[TS]
00:21:43
◼
►
years never been troubled by scoops
[TS]
00:21:45
◼
►
that is not to say that sometimes my
[TS]
00:21:47
◼
►
pillows don't turn to howells but i
[TS]
00:21:48
◼
►
think that is unrelated but you never
[TS]
00:21:51
◼
►
saw so far you've been lucky in the
[TS]
00:21:53
◼
►
sense that you're feeling in your heart
[TS]
00:21:57
◼
►
or mind or whatever it is you have is
[TS]
00:21:59
◼
►
that there may be some learning from
[TS]
00:22:01
◼
►
there okay your esophagus somewhere in
[TS]
00:22:04
◼
►
your esophagus
[TS]
00:22:05
◼
►
no more suspect something's going on now
[TS]
00:22:07
◼
►
you're a man who's very kind of setup I
[TS]
00:22:09
◼
►
need to your very vigilant right you
[TS]
00:22:12
◼
►
dive you dive out of the subway you dive
[TS]
00:22:14
◼
►
into an airplane and exactly the right
[TS]
00:22:15
◼
►
time and it seems to me you're not that
[TS]
00:22:18
◼
►
spooked by the Owls you literally
[TS]
00:22:19
◼
►
grabbed and went back to 60 it sounds to
[TS]
00:22:21
◼
►
me like so far you have not had to adopt
[TS]
00:22:23
◼
►
anything like a Winchester Mystery House
[TS]
00:22:24
◼
►
approach to making the ghost go away
[TS]
00:22:25
◼
►
dealt with this or they've dealt with
[TS]
00:22:27
◼
►
you you've reached something like a
[TS]
00:22:29
◼
►
rapprochement with them and everything's
[TS]
00:22:31
◼
►
correct baka over the years i have i
[TS]
00:22:35
◼
►
ever tell you the story about that house
[TS]
00:22:37
◼
►
in Vermont
[TS]
00:22:37
◼
►
yeah I'm just coming to that yeah so
[TS]
00:22:40
◼
►
there's that house in Vermont where the
[TS]
00:22:41
◼
►
people put me in the in this spook room
[TS]
00:22:43
◼
►
and they thought it was funny
[TS]
00:22:45
◼
►
they thought it was funny like all we
[TS]
00:22:46
◼
►
were wondering if you're going to feel
[TS]
00:22:47
◼
►
the spook she's that's like putting up
[TS]
00:22:48
◼
►
elected as like playing epileptic in the
[TS]
00:22:50
◼
►
in the in the flash strobe light room
[TS]
00:22:53
◼
►
the stroke leg room
[TS]
00:22:55
◼
►
yeah well you know I have a strobe light
[TS]
00:22:56
◼
►
room here and I just always steer the
[TS]
00:22:58
◼
►
epileptics away again like your dinner
[TS]
00:23:00
◼
►
and I think you'd like this room over
[TS]
00:23:02
◼
►
here much fun little with the ghost but
[TS]
00:23:04
◼
►
but you know I spent that night
[TS]
00:23:06
◼
►
Crouch to with a knife between my teeth
[TS]
00:23:08
◼
►
waiting for whatever a whatever spook it
[TS]
00:23:12
◼
►
was it was going to come through i don't
[TS]
00:23:13
◼
►
know we're always gonna come but I don't
[TS]
00:23:15
◼
►
think if i put a fake doorknob on the on
[TS]
00:23:17
◼
►
the wall of the closet that would fool
[TS]
00:23:19
◼
►
that's broken all you need already knew
[TS]
00:23:21
◼
►
even though there was something in your
[TS]
00:23:23
◼
►
intuition that said this is serious like
[TS]
00:23:25
◼
►
I need to get a knife for this ghost
[TS]
00:23:26
◼
►
potentially you had the presence of mind
[TS]
00:23:28
◼
►
your rational man John it's something
[TS]
00:23:30
◼
►
that you've talked about really way too
[TS]
00:23:31
◼
►
much but the fact is you're rational man
[TS]
00:23:33
◼
►
you know a doorknob is not going to full
[TS]
00:23:34
◼
►
of ghosts right i don't think you can
[TS]
00:23:37
◼
►
fool a ghost
[TS]
00:23:38
◼
►
oh yes because they already are in there
[TS]
00:23:40
◼
►
they're like low-key with the Avengers
[TS]
00:23:42
◼
►
like he's already been there he knows
[TS]
00:23:44
◼
►
what's going on right I'm not remember
[TS]
00:23:47
◼
►
that reference was that are like a dora
[TS]
00:23:50
◼
►
the explorer reference can in Norse
[TS]
00:23:52
◼
►
mythology it's something you can look up
[TS]
00:23:54
◼
►
on the 00 Norse mythology
[TS]
00:23:56
◼
►
yeah so usually the worst stores brother
[TS]
00:23:58
◼
►
and source brother who is the god of
[TS]
00:24:00
◼
►
mischief and lying wants to become the
[TS]
00:24:02
◼
►
god Odin takes over
[TS]
00:24:04
◼
►
although Thor's 21 so low-key fucks
[TS]
00:24:06
◼
►
things up and then that's why they have
[TS]
00:24:08
◼
►
to start the adventures as it is not
[TS]
00:24:10
◼
►
that complicated just something you
[TS]
00:24:11
◼
►
learned during your church burning fans
[TS]
00:24:13
◼
►
are you talking about when i was in that
[TS]
00:24:15
◼
►
that Swedish death metal band
[TS]
00:24:18
◼
►
the the sweetest death metal was saying
[TS]
00:24:19
◼
►
that stuff a lot of terrible but some
[TS]
00:24:21
◼
►
was really good i have not that is one
[TS]
00:24:24
◼
►
musical genre i have not really given
[TS]
00:24:26
◼
►
I'm gonna pick exactly one band i sent
[TS]
00:24:28
◼
►
you exactly one video for one band and I
[TS]
00:24:31
◼
►
out it's not it's I think these guys all
[TS]
00:24:33
◼
►
we're like King Diamond make a so
[TS]
00:24:35
◼
►
there's two you should come back to this
[TS]
00:24:36
◼
►
there's there's two there's the
[TS]
00:24:38
◼
►
Norwegian black metal and the Swedish
[TS]
00:24:40
◼
►
death metal you want to go with the
[TS]
00:24:42
◼
►
Swedish death metal the Norwegian black
[TS]
00:24:43
◼
►
metal is very very silly look like pro
[TS]
00:24:45
◼
►
wrestlers and then if you imagine this
[TS]
00:24:48
◼
►
look one kind of like a boss pedal when
[TS]
00:24:50
◼
►
they turn the like this the trouble and
[TS]
00:24:53
◼
►
though it's so I have that pedal i can
[TS]
00:24:56
◼
►
make one can i make make just one
[TS]
00:24:57
◼
►
observation
[TS]
00:24:58
◼
►
yeah okay here's my observation and I
[TS]
00:25:00
◼
►
don't want to do pull up bad memories
[TS]
00:25:01
◼
►
for you but you had the ghost concern in
[TS]
00:25:06
◼
►
the house and was a Vermont Vermont you
[TS]
00:25:09
◼
►
slept in the van one night in your and
[TS]
00:25:12
◼
►
you're all together and were attacked by
[TS]
00:25:14
◼
►
my front yard and you know outside our
[TS]
00:25:17
◼
►
home and out of the park came soldiers
[TS]
00:25:20
◼
►
from which war i believe they were civil
[TS]
00:25:22
◼
►
war soldiers of a war that you thought
[TS]
00:25:24
◼
►
it was their Confederates but it didn't
[TS]
00:25:26
◼
►
make any sense because of course there
[TS]
00:25:27
◼
►
were no civil war battles fought in San
[TS]
00:25:29
◼
►
Francisco that you know of but that
[TS]
00:25:30
◼
►
doesn't mean you know in seattle there
[TS]
00:25:32
◼
►
is a civil war cemetery where all of the
[TS]
00:25:35
◼
►
veterans of the Civil War were buried at
[TS]
00:25:37
◼
►
the town after they moved it well they
[TS]
00:25:39
◼
►
could be they could be organized in the
[TS]
00:25:41
◼
►
afterlife they could all be buried there
[TS]
00:25:43
◼
►
and be like hey wait a minute and that
[TS]
00:25:45
◼
►
that you are I've been reading a civil
[TS]
00:25:49
◼
►
war book and i gotta tell you i don't
[TS]
00:25:51
◼
►
think that fits in is it going with the
[TS]
00:25:53
◼
►
yeah no no it's called April 18650
[TS]
00:25:55
◼
►
you're reading a nonfiction civil war
[TS]
00:25:58
◼
►
book i usually read Harlequin romances
[TS]
00:26:00
◼
►
about the period up with a lot of
[TS]
00:26:02
◼
►
troubles in Richmond sure it did take
[TS]
00:26:05
◼
►
dogs and shit
[TS]
00:26:06
◼
►
yeah well little shit aah shit and well
[TS]
00:26:09
◼
►
they would pick through corn never pick
[TS]
00:26:10
◼
►
through for corn they would go through
[TS]
00:26:12
◼
►
horse down to find what they could and
[TS]
00:26:14
◼
►
it's just corn rocky about telling your
[TS]
00:26:16
◼
►
erotic these this is the Richmond was a
[TS]
00:26:18
◼
►
place and you can learn about this from
[TS]
00:26:19
◼
►
a song by the band called the night they
[TS]
00:26:21
◼
►
drove old dixie down with varying story
[TS]
00:26:23
◼
►
i'll recommend the book is April 1865
[TS]
00:26:25
◼
►
and then on another occasion we won home
[TS]
00:26:28
◼
►
yeah i know god bless him that yet that
[TS]
00:26:29
◼
►
performance of
[TS]
00:26:31
◼
►
that at the fillmore i put on my
[TS]
00:26:32
◼
►
internet website got its great different
[TS]
00:26:35
◼
►
from the last waltz had to date so much
[TS]
00:26:36
◼
►
cocaine this guy's everybody in the last
[TS]
00:26:39
◼
►
waltz is high on cocaine in almost all
[TS]
00:26:41
◼
►
the time now that rectangle got real
[TS]
00:26:43
◼
►
puffy and then he died he was such a
[TS]
00:26:44
◼
►
good-looking man when he was young it
[TS]
00:26:47
◼
►
was a good looking very good man this
[TS]
00:26:48
◼
►
guy's could sing we should talk about
[TS]
00:26:49
◼
►
the band something we could they want
[TS]
00:26:51
◼
►
with a trained ID like the band
[TS]
00:26:54
◼
►
how do i did he ask a question like that
[TS]
00:26:56
◼
►
I asked about kissing you like them
[TS]
00:26:58
◼
►
well here's the difference bring kiss
[TS]
00:27:00
◼
►
and the band accounts mine kiss are
[TS]
00:27:02
◼
►
terrible and the band one of the most
[TS]
00:27:05
◼
►
important groups of our generation
[TS]
00:27:07
◼
►
that's a-ok you can make a little file
[TS]
00:27:11
◼
►
card or just you know you could tattoo
[TS]
00:27:12
◼
►
that on your thumb so potential goes to
[TS]
00:27:15
◼
►
Vermont knife in the teeth you're naked
[TS]
00:27:17
◼
►
in the van in front of my house and
[TS]
00:27:18
◼
►
there might be some Confederate soldiers
[TS]
00:27:20
◼
►
on one occasion there might have been
[TS]
00:27:21
◼
►
aliens rattling your door on occasion
[TS]
00:27:23
◼
►
fairly recently all of your pillows turn
[TS]
00:27:26
◼
►
the Owls made note just in passing that
[TS]
00:27:28
◼
►
in several of these instances you have
[TS]
00:27:31
◼
►
attempted on some level to communicate
[TS]
00:27:33
◼
►
with the spirits that may or may not be
[TS]
00:27:35
◼
►
there and in each instance that you've
[TS]
00:27:37
◼
►
shared with me so far they have been
[TS]
00:27:38
◼
►
mute correct
[TS]
00:27:41
◼
►
so you're talking to them they're not
[TS]
00:27:42
◼
►
talking to you you're pretty sure
[TS]
00:27:43
◼
►
they're there but they're not really
[TS]
00:27:44
◼
►
responding in a way they're not
[TS]
00:27:45
◼
►
responding the way that you can
[TS]
00:27:46
◼
►
understand its response correct creating
[TS]
00:27:50
◼
►
lucky with you at all are they ignoring
[TS]
00:27:53
◼
►
ah they do not ever materialized to the
[TS]
00:27:57
◼
►
point where i can or where I'm
[TS]
00:28:01
◼
►
confidently they're communicating with
[TS]
00:28:03
◼
►
them directly understand they are they
[TS]
00:28:06
◼
►
they remain a they remain a suspicion
[TS]
00:28:10
◼
►
and they become just like what collate
[TS]
00:28:14
◼
►
enough they just become their there
[TS]
00:28:15
◼
►
enough that it goes from there might be
[TS]
00:28:18
◼
►
something up here till they keep your
[TS]
00:28:21
◼
►
pretty sure that's a now you're pretty
[TS]
00:28:22
◼
►
sure that was an owl right all the owl's
[TS]
00:28:24
◼
►
there's no question about it but they
[TS]
00:28:25
◼
►
are actually friends that we talked
[TS]
00:28:26
◼
►
about oranges apples and oranges and
[TS]
00:28:28
◼
►
owls are you talking about girls are
[TS]
00:28:30
◼
►
different but the Owls are different
[TS]
00:28:32
◼
►
from the potential aren't aliens even
[TS]
00:28:34
◼
►
the right word the visitors the Aldens
[TS]
00:28:36
◼
►
you get the avian you get the visit
[TS]
00:28:39
◼
►
hills were clearly visitors but they
[TS]
00:28:41
◼
►
they took a physical form where normally
[TS]
00:28:43
◼
►
it's just like the hair goes up on the
[TS]
00:28:44
◼
►
back of your neck one night for instance
[TS]
00:28:47
◼
►
i was sleeping on the beach
[TS]
00:28:49
◼
►
we outside outside of a town called
[TS]
00:28:51
◼
►
noordwijk on the on the Dutch coast
[TS]
00:28:57
◼
►
spell that word white guy like it sounds
[TS]
00:29:01
◼
►
yeah and 0 rd her dik wi j lam gonna
[TS]
00:29:09
◼
►
okay like you're weak ok is there is
[TS]
00:29:12
◼
►
there like a little is there a little
[TS]
00:29:14
◼
►
less / through one of the O's know
[TS]
00:29:17
◼
►
there's 2 o's and I think they're / free
[TS]
00:29:19
◼
►
okay go ahead this on it's like outside
[TS]
00:29:20
◼
►
of the streets would be stank on its
[TS]
00:29:26
◼
►
part of its by spending dingen job all
[TS]
00:29:29
◼
►
right that's right the spending engine
[TS]
00:29:32
◼
►
sounds very popular in Swedish after
[TS]
00:29:33
◼
►
metal 15 / just like Switzer it's on
[TS]
00:29:35
◼
►
it's on it's on the netherlands and it's
[TS]
00:29:38
◼
►
been a long time since I'd slept outside
[TS]
00:29:39
◼
►
at this point i was i was getting my out
[TS]
00:29:42
◼
►
sleeping outside feedback on and and i
[TS]
00:29:46
◼
►
was i was on the beach it was a
[TS]
00:29:47
◼
►
beautiful very beautiful spring night
[TS]
00:29:50
◼
►
and I was like you know what I'm just
[TS]
00:29:51
◼
►
gonna sleep on the beach I used to sleep
[TS]
00:29:54
◼
►
outside all the time I i I'd forgotten
[TS]
00:29:56
◼
►
as I was saying this to myself I used to
[TS]
00:29:58
◼
►
sleep outside all the time because i
[TS]
00:29:59
◼
►
would get drunk and pass out under a
[TS]
00:30:01
◼
►
bush that counts and I was like you know
[TS]
00:30:03
◼
►
I used to sleep out all the time i'm
[TS]
00:30:05
◼
►
going to start sleeping out again
[TS]
00:30:06
◼
►
because because hey for what it's free
[TS]
00:30:08
◼
►
don't throw out the baby with the bath
[TS]
00:30:10
◼
►
that's right and to it so it's beautiful
[TS]
00:30:12
◼
►
so so so I lay down on the sand and I
[TS]
00:30:15
◼
►
kind of dig myself a little lamb little
[TS]
00:30:18
◼
►
bed in the sand and lay down on the sand
[TS]
00:30:21
◼
►
and then the Sun Goes Down and the stars
[TS]
00:30:24
◼
►
come out i'm lying on the beach
[TS]
00:30:27
◼
►
and I and the kind of the wind picks up
[TS]
00:30:31
◼
►
a nice and I suddenly feel like there's
[TS]
00:30:35
◼
►
nothing keeping me from falling into the
[TS]
00:30:38
◼
►
sky forever like there's nothing
[TS]
00:30:43
◼
►
absolutely nothing keeping me from just
[TS]
00:30:47
◼
►
a falling forever into infinity
[TS]
00:30:50
◼
►
except for gravity but gravity did not
[TS]
00:30:54
◼
►
have as as powerful hold on me at that
[TS]
00:30:57
◼
►
moment as it normally does and I lay
[TS]
00:31:00
◼
►
there on the beach looking up at the at
[TS]
00:31:02
◼
►
the inn infinitude of the universe and I
[TS]
00:31:06
◼
►
literally was holding on i was grabbing
[TS]
00:31:10
◼
►
onto the sand because i was i was
[TS]
00:31:15
◼
►
terrified I was I was in a terror that i
[TS]
00:31:19
◼
►
was going to just start falling up and I
[TS]
00:31:26
◼
►
a and then the feeling did not pass i
[TS]
00:31:31
◼
►
spend i spent a what what felt like an
[TS]
00:31:35
◼
►
eternity lying there on this Beach not
[TS]
00:31:40
◼
►
convinced not easily convinced that i
[TS]
00:31:42
◼
►
could document myself that if I let go
[TS]
00:31:44
◼
►
and most of it was a psychological
[TS]
00:31:48
◼
►
letting go like if I if I just said ok
[TS]
00:31:52
◼
►
fine if I had surrendered I would have
[TS]
00:31:56
◼
►
fallen off of that beach into space
[TS]
00:31:59
◼
►
Wow and I would still be falling sounds
[TS]
00:32:03
◼
►
harrowing it was nuts
[TS]
00:32:05
◼
►
how long have a sense of how long it
[TS]
00:32:07
◼
►
lasted from one lasted until the sand
[TS]
00:32:11
◼
►
underneath me
[TS]
00:32:14
◼
►
this is the thing that thing about
[TS]
00:32:16
◼
►
sleeping on beaches and sand looks very
[TS]
00:32:19
◼
►
soft when you're walking on the beach in
[TS]
00:32:23
◼
►
the in the afternoon late afternoon but
[TS]
00:32:25
◼
►
when you lie on the sand and try and get
[TS]
00:32:27
◼
►
comfortable in the night sand turns to
[TS]
00:32:30
◼
►
cement which is
[TS]
00:32:32
◼
►
it's extremely unfriendly 44 back it is
[TS]
00:32:34
◼
►
not soft now and so as time went on this
[TS]
00:32:38
◼
►
little depression this bed I made for
[TS]
00:32:40
◼
►
myself in the sand turned into kind of a
[TS]
00:32:42
◼
►
cement gravy boat times of suffering
[TS]
00:32:48
◼
►
where I lay i kind of right there ever
[TS]
00:32:52
◼
►
again make people like the ring
[TS]
00:32:55
◼
►
yeah well you just made my next hour lot
[TS]
00:32:58
◼
►
easier kind of like a curved kind of
[TS]
00:33:01
◼
►
like a curved so you're not going to get
[TS]
00:33:04
◼
►
there now you can forget everything i
[TS]
00:33:06
◼
►
make you sleep in our house is a big
[TS]
00:33:08
◼
►
inflatable taco I believe
[TS]
00:33:10
◼
►
yeah it's an inflatable talk about
[TS]
00:33:11
◼
►
because of it starts off
[TS]
00:33:13
◼
►
I didn't realize how bad it was Eleanor
[TS]
00:33:14
◼
►
started jumping on FB left in school
[TS]
00:33:17
◼
►
yeah it starts off as a nice inflate a
[TS]
00:33:19
◼
►
bed that seems like oh this is
[TS]
00:33:20
◼
►
delightful and then as time goes on it
[TS]
00:33:22
◼
►
becomes a plastic tortilla against
[TS]
00:33:24
◼
►
replacing I interrupted you you're
[TS]
00:33:26
◼
►
talking you're talking of course about
[TS]
00:33:27
◼
►
about the town of Noorvik where there is
[TS]
00:33:29
◼
►
a beautiful beach where the popular
[TS]
00:33:30
◼
►
activities include kitesurfing sounds
[TS]
00:33:33
◼
►
like it's if you look this place up now
[TS]
00:33:35
◼
►
not doing this from memory i just can't
[TS]
00:33:36
◼
►
remember which one therefore campsites
[TS]
00:33:38
◼
►
in the region approximately plus or
[TS]
00:33:40
◼
►
minus justice justice white 3400 hotels
[TS]
00:33:43
◼
►
and bmps and it said the number to
[TS]
00:33:45
◼
►
Congress destination and another one's
[TS]
00:33:47
◼
►
please continue
[TS]
00:33:47
◼
►
I should I should've stayed in one of
[TS]
00:33:49
◼
►
those hotels that gravy boat suffering
[TS]
00:33:52
◼
►
so anyway as my as my sentence and is
[TS]
00:33:55
◼
►
now unyielding yours but you still have
[TS]
00:33:57
◼
►
the sense that you could float away into
[TS]
00:34:00
◼
►
the sky for infinity i could fall into
[TS]
00:34:02
◼
►
this into infinity and what I realized
[TS]
00:34:05
◼
►
in that moment was that at this that
[TS]
00:34:08
◼
►
this that the lights of the city the the
[TS]
00:34:12
◼
►
the the electric light has formed a kind
[TS]
00:34:18
◼
►
of dome over the cities where we live
[TS]
00:34:21
◼
►
and it is a protective dome a protective
[TS]
00:34:25
◼
►
shield that shields us from full
[TS]
00:34:28
◼
►
awareness of how deep and infinite
[TS]
00:34:31
◼
►
spaces right so we sit in our cities and
[TS]
00:34:35
◼
►
the NR electric lights have blanked out
[TS]
00:34:37
◼
►
the sky for us
[TS]
00:34:40
◼
►
and we no longer have first-hand
[TS]
00:34:42
◼
►
experience of the existential terror
[TS]
00:34:44
◼
►
that it that is available to you at any
[TS]
00:34:48
◼
►
point in time if you just try and spend
[TS]
00:34:50
◼
►
one night outside on the beach or in the
[TS]
00:34:53
◼
►
forest and that is something that human
[TS]
00:34:56
◼
►
beings knew intimately throughout the
[TS]
00:34:59
◼
►
whole course of human history that's why
[TS]
00:35:01
◼
►
they made houses that's why they made
[TS]
00:35:02
◼
►
houses that's where they circled the
[TS]
00:35:04
◼
►
wagons that's why they made friends with
[TS]
00:35:06
◼
►
each other that's why they lit fires at
[TS]
00:35:08
◼
►
night that's why I didn't come to you in
[TS]
00:35:10
◼
►
a flash
[TS]
00:35:11
◼
►
well I'm lying there holding onto the
[TS]
00:35:13
◼
►
beach trying not easy it's something to
[TS]
00:35:15
◼
►
think about
[TS]
00:35:15
◼
►
well yeah i know i mean i was sitting
[TS]
00:35:17
◼
►
there if you had come to me and said
[TS]
00:35:18
◼
►
that God was a big purple dinosaur life
[TS]
00:35:21
◼
►
I've clutch my share of beaches believe
[TS]
00:35:23
◼
►
yeah and i would i would have said about
[TS]
00:35:25
◼
►
fucking whatever you say because the
[TS]
00:35:28
◼
►
that the terror that is that is waiting
[TS]
00:35:30
◼
►
for us when we truly contemplate that
[TS]
00:35:33
◼
►
just the scale and scope of the universe
[TS]
00:35:36
◼
►
in which we live is not a terror that I
[TS]
00:35:38
◼
►
am that I that i'm racing out to
[TS]
00:35:42
◼
►
experiencing every night so I i realized
[TS]
00:35:46
◼
►
that that we have done weird have done
[TS]
00:35:48
◼
►
ourselves both a disservice and and
[TS]
00:35:50
◼
►
tremendous service in the in the
[TS]
00:35:53
◼
►
blanking out how much how big the the
[TS]
00:35:59
◼
►
unknown is and we've done it you know
[TS]
00:36:01
◼
►
kind of we're not conscious of when you
[TS]
00:36:04
◼
►
turn on the lights at night giving
[TS]
00:36:05
◼
►
comfort that understanding
[TS]
00:36:08
◼
►
well the the idea that there might be
[TS]
00:36:10
◼
►
sort of an ontological umbrella that
[TS]
00:36:13
◼
►
protects us from knowing how how
[TS]
00:36:14
◼
►
terrible this could be if it with the
[TS]
00:36:16
◼
►
Infinity no I despise it
[TS]
00:36:18
◼
►
alright despised it when I understood it
[TS]
00:36:20
◼
►
but it didn't come for you at all it
[TS]
00:36:22
◼
►
makes you even more nervous about the
[TS]
00:36:24
◼
►
sand was you know you're worried that
[TS]
00:36:25
◼
►
your ass is on the line at this point
[TS]
00:36:27
◼
►
right well yeah but but but but I didn't
[TS]
00:36:30
◼
►
want to retreat into some kind of how
[TS]
00:36:32
◼
►
blanket of lights cold comfort
[TS]
00:36:34
◼
►
no no no what once you once you once you
[TS]
00:36:37
◼
►
have a sense of it then of course I
[TS]
00:36:40
◼
►
wanted to I wanted to face it and so I
[TS]
00:36:45
◼
►
started sleeping outside at that point
[TS]
00:36:47
◼
►
every night which is much more
[TS]
00:36:50
◼
►
complicated when you're in Amsterdam
[TS]
00:36:53
◼
►
then when you're in noordwijk for very
[TS]
00:36:56
◼
►
it's very much more difficult to sleep
[TS]
00:36:58
◼
►
outside say in cologne try and find a
[TS]
00:37:01
◼
►
gravy boat haha ok next time next time
[TS]
00:37:04
◼
►
next time you're there just and just are
[TS]
00:37:06
◼
►
looking for great try and find a
[TS]
00:37:07
◼
►
human-sized submit gravy boat of
[TS]
00:37:09
◼
►
suffering instagramming sleeping a bong
[TS]
00:37:11
◼
►
and a lot of people know that actually
[TS]
00:37:12
◼
►
amsterdam for 50 euros you can sleep in
[TS]
00:37:15
◼
►
a cement gravy boat of suffering it sits
[TS]
00:37:17
◼
►
at the palais du gravy boat is that the
[TS]
00:37:20
◼
►
ladies really standing windows is that
[TS]
00:37:22
◼
►
have you never been to Amsterdam yeah
[TS]
00:37:24
◼
►
Charlie there all the time
[TS]
00:37:25
◼
►
come on what are you doing in here with
[TS]
00:37:28
◼
►
your youth being being self-conscious if
[TS]
00:37:31
◼
►
you were playing mrs. pacman somewhere
[TS]
00:37:33
◼
►
there is no mrs. pacman but there are
[TS]
00:37:39
◼
►
the ladies sunday i'll tell you where i
[TS]
00:37:40
◼
►
have traveled we have to share that with
[TS]
00:37:42
◼
►
you I I don't derail this because I
[TS]
00:37:43
◼
►
think we're getting towards something
[TS]
00:37:44
◼
►
very important I think I think I don't
[TS]
00:37:46
◼
►
know I don't know how much you have
[TS]
00:37:48
◼
►
allowed yourself to to collapse that
[TS]
00:37:50
◼
►
umbrella over time but I think you're
[TS]
00:37:52
◼
►
very close to linking several probably
[TS]
00:37:54
◼
►
unrelated things together in a way that
[TS]
00:37:56
◼
►
could be very gratifying everyone
[TS]
00:37:58
◼
►
well are you not thinking hear about
[TS]
00:38:02
◼
►
some this kind of combination of a great
[TS]
00:38:04
◼
►
mystery and aren't you glad I move this
[TS]
00:38:06
◼
►
over to philosophy are you happy about
[TS]
00:38:08
◼
►
that so much and it before the show I
[TS]
00:38:10
◼
►
didn't tell you I did if I move this
[TS]
00:38:11
◼
►
from personal journals to philosophy
[TS]
00:38:13
◼
►
just because i added feeling a man like
[TS]
00:38:15
◼
►
you didn't like having a journal
[TS]
00:38:16
◼
►
personal journal is just give me that
[TS]
00:38:18
◼
►
just sounds like my livejournal right
[TS]
00:38:20
◼
►
made me feel like I was wearing a blouse
[TS]
00:38:23
◼
►
ok i I'm a little short on Cartoon to
[TS]
00:38:27
◼
►
urinate but here's the thing you've got
[TS]
00:38:29
◼
►
on the one hand I i if we cut all this
[TS]
00:38:31
◼
►
out if this is you know anything
[TS]
00:38:33
◼
►
yeah let's cut it all out of the great
[TS]
00:38:36
◼
►
boat you think about touching that
[TS]
00:38:37
◼
►
fucking great about your high you know
[TS]
00:38:39
◼
►
there are lots of girls and windows in
[TS]
00:38:41
◼
►
the Institute who and I think I
[TS]
00:38:43
◼
►
literally write that down
[TS]
00:38:44
◼
►
yeah i have only ever in the many many
[TS]
00:38:46
◼
►
many many many nights I've spent in
[TS]
00:38:48
◼
►
Amsterdam huh i have only ever wins when
[TS]
00:38:52
◼
►
were you in bands like I understand you
[TS]
00:38:54
◼
►
do so much of this traveling by
[TS]
00:38:55
◼
►
completely and you're not like a rich
[TS]
00:38:57
◼
►
rich guy I just I'm completely baffled
[TS]
00:38:59
◼
►
about how this many people have been
[TS]
00:39:01
◼
►
touched by you and you still still found
[TS]
00:39:03
◼
►
time to be in harvey danger
[TS]
00:39:06
◼
►
no I mean it's I feel like I feel like
[TS]
00:39:08
◼
►
I'm talking to somebody like on
[TS]
00:39:09
◼
►
Bullwinkle like I I don't wiggle LOL
[TS]
00:39:11
◼
►
like a like maybe like you're like mr.
[TS]
00:39:14
◼
►
peabody & sherman haha
[TS]
00:39:16
◼
►
30 but no I kind of like that i showed
[TS]
00:39:19
◼
►
my daughter first Bullwinkle Seth I
[TS]
00:39:20
◼
►
spent my use now that's good okay so
[TS]
00:39:22
◼
►
i've written down girls and windows and
[TS]
00:39:23
◼
►
I promise you let you continue you on
[TS]
00:39:25
◼
►
the one hand
[TS]
00:39:26
◼
►
yeah are sharing with us some very very
[TS]
00:39:28
◼
►
important i'll be a personal information
[TS]
00:39:30
◼
►
about the universe on the one hand you
[TS]
00:39:32
◼
►
are intensely aware if I may say that
[TS]
00:39:34
◼
►
there is 890 force there is something
[TS]
00:39:38
◼
►
out there that does represent infinity
[TS]
00:39:40
◼
►
at this point according to science we're
[TS]
00:39:41
◼
►
pretty sure the universe goes on for a
[TS]
00:39:43
◼
►
long way long time no the level that we
[TS]
00:39:45
◼
►
cannot by the way i have recently
[TS]
00:39:47
◼
►
started fucking with my daughter about
[TS]
00:39:48
◼
►
the idea infinity because i just i do
[TS]
00:39:50
◼
►
very much remember sitting around
[TS]
00:39:51
◼
►
thinking about infinity and getting
[TS]
00:39:52
◼
►
dizzy and what is how was her response
[TS]
00:39:55
◼
►
to it so far I'm just fucking with a
[TS]
00:39:56
◼
►
very lightly right now eleanor was the
[TS]
00:39:57
◼
►
highest number and the number she always
[TS]
00:39:59
◼
►
pulls out which is an even number 613
[TS]
00:40:02
◼
►
232 that's the number she uses all the
[TS]
00:40:06
◼
►
uh-huh and I say no what about a hundred
[TS]
00:40:08
◼
►
thirty and 3i need can see where this
[TS]
00:40:10
◼
►
goes right think yeah yeah I get
[TS]
00:40:12
◼
►
confused after 260 so usually wins and I
[TS]
00:40:15
◼
►
wanna watch TV on the one hand there's
[TS]
00:40:17
◼
►
this thing that you become intensely
[TS]
00:40:18
◼
►
we're busy as you as you lay as you lay
[TS]
00:40:21
◼
►
in in your Dutch gravy boat you aware
[TS]
00:40:23
◼
►
that there's something out there you're
[TS]
00:40:25
◼
►
you're aware that it sounds to me like
[TS]
00:40:27
◼
►
you are not comforted by this somewhat
[TS]
00:40:29
◼
►
is a fictional but the idea that these
[TS]
00:40:32
◼
►
beams of light are actually causing you
[TS]
00:40:34
◼
►
any it to be saved from that in any way
[TS]
00:40:35
◼
►
you're also thinking a lot about these
[TS]
00:40:38
◼
►
what not even apparitions that's that's
[TS]
00:40:41
◼
►
a a perceptual thing about these things
[TS]
00:40:44
◼
►
we can't see and understand that maybe
[TS]
00:40:46
◼
►
moving amongst us and interacting with
[TS]
00:40:48
◼
►
us and our been are in our places you're
[TS]
00:40:50
◼
►
thinking about these things
[TS]
00:40:52
◼
►
yeah right you are going through the
[TS]
00:40:53
◼
►
most ridiculously rational man I've ever
[TS]
00:40:55
◼
►
met except for the many ways that you're
[TS]
00:40:56
◼
►
completely fucking nut
[TS]
00:40:58
◼
►
you're very rational man you're and
[TS]
00:41:00
◼
►
you're very you want to confront these
[TS]
00:41:01
◼
►
things and just seems to me that there
[TS]
00:41:03
◼
►
might be a threat here between some of
[TS]
00:41:04
◼
►
these these things that you've had
[TS]
00:41:06
◼
►
access to with your visions none of
[TS]
00:41:07
◼
►
these with my business thank you none of
[TS]
00:41:09
◼
►
these things that rationalization Sean
[TS]
00:41:11
◼
►
I'm not judging i'm not thinking about
[TS]
00:41:13
◼
►
any of these things I was not lying on
[TS]
00:41:14
◼
►
the on the beach and thinking about the
[TS]
00:41:16
◼
►
infinitude
[TS]
00:41:18
◼
►
I was caught in the cold grip of terror
[TS]
00:41:21
◼
►
as I as I contemplate to come from
[TS]
00:41:24
◼
►
exactly i mean i think it is I think it
[TS]
00:41:27
◼
►
is spirit that it came from somewhere
[TS]
00:41:30
◼
►
well i think it is I think it is our it
[TS]
00:41:32
◼
►
is prehistoric in us that always lying
[TS]
00:41:36
◼
►
dormant a sleeper cell
[TS]
00:41:37
◼
►
yeah yo this is part of the reason that
[TS]
00:41:39
◼
►
I walked from amsterdam to istanbul i
[TS]
00:41:42
◼
►
was trying to activate what I what I
[TS]
00:41:45
◼
►
understood to be a thing that over the
[TS]
00:41:50
◼
►
course of human history but one
[TS]
00:41:52
◼
►
commonality that all groups of people
[TS]
00:41:55
◼
►
all you know races and cultures in the
[TS]
00:41:57
◼
►
book the the common thread is that at
[TS]
00:42:00
◼
►
some point we we were somewhere as a
[TS]
00:42:02
◼
►
group of people and we marched out of
[TS]
00:42:05
◼
►
where where we knew and marched
[TS]
00:42:07
◼
►
somewhere new
[TS]
00:42:08
◼
►
right i mean we we were at one point we
[TS]
00:42:10
◼
►
were all confined to where we had and
[TS]
00:42:13
◼
►
that's got to be like I don't know a lot
[TS]
00:42:15
◼
►
about young that that sounds like that
[TS]
00:42:16
◼
►
or Joseph Campbell or whatever that
[TS]
00:42:18
◼
►
nonsense I and that seems like a story
[TS]
00:42:20
◼
►
that is deeply ingrained in us
[TS]
00:42:22
◼
►
especially in America it since we
[TS]
00:42:24
◼
►
marched from either together and that
[TS]
00:42:28
◼
►
marching is something that I was trying
[TS]
00:42:31
◼
►
to use as a like an activator up i
[TS]
00:42:36
◼
►
started one place and just walking day
[TS]
00:42:39
◼
►
after day after day in the skin in one
[TS]
00:42:42
◼
►
direction I hoped to you know to to
[TS]
00:42:47
◼
►
bring this this deeply dormant thing out
[TS]
00:42:52
◼
►
of myself and that I would become more
[TS]
00:42:55
◼
►
of a that I would have more than that I
[TS]
00:43:00
◼
►
would be able to connect to something
[TS]
00:43:02
◼
►
that I was not able to connect to in
[TS]
00:43:04
◼
►
intellectually you're getting access to
[TS]
00:43:06
◼
►
something I was hoping to find I was
[TS]
00:43:08
◼
►
hoping to find a pure honest about a
[TS]
00:43:11
◼
►
prior notice by doing this type of thing
[TS]
00:43:15
◼
►
that I i wasn't able to successfully
[TS]
00:43:18
◼
►
shed all of the month modernity by just
[TS]
00:43:23
◼
►
willing it away right I couldn't just
[TS]
00:43:25
◼
►
walk around without ID and and drink in
[TS]
00:43:30
◼
►
and so we get back to like what what I
[TS]
00:43:34
◼
►
would have been if I had not what I
[TS]
00:43:37
◼
►
would have been as a human being if i
[TS]
00:43:38
◼
►
had not been raised in a in a culture I
[TS]
00:43:43
◼
►
was that's what straight and what is
[TS]
00:43:44
◼
►
raised with a lot of abstractions some
[TS]
00:43:48
◼
►
of which are necessary many of which are
[TS]
00:43:50
◼
►
not but which but which abstractions I
[TS]
00:43:52
◼
►
don't mean to jump hijack your story but
[TS]
00:43:53
◼
►
those abstractions that we accept for
[TS]
00:43:55
◼
►
ourselves becoming really indelible like
[TS]
00:43:57
◼
►
nobody fires twenty-dollar bills away
[TS]
00:43:59
◼
►
but that's a very real abstraction yeah
[TS]
00:44:01
◼
►
are abstractions that are usually
[TS]
00:44:03
◼
►
abstractions we develop to solve a
[TS]
00:44:06
◼
►
problem that we have created with a
[TS]
00:44:08
◼
►
prior abstraction
[TS]
00:44:10
◼
►
ohh that Apple think about this though
[TS]
00:44:12
◼
►
where do I think what your kind
[TS]
00:44:14
◼
►
describing is is I'm trying to give a
[TS]
00:44:17
◼
►
good example like you think about like
[TS]
00:44:18
◼
►
we what you went through when you're in
[TS]
00:44:20
◼
►
New York and somebody you know pull the
[TS]
00:44:24
◼
►
gun you a funny story from from another
[TS]
00:44:26
◼
►
thing I do Scott Scott Simpson's wife
[TS]
00:44:27
◼
►
when they were in Scott Simpson's wife
[TS]
00:44:30
◼
►
easy text ya you gotta but you don't
[TS]
00:44:35
◼
►
wanna know what makes got cry and drink
[TS]
00:44:38
◼
►
no I or even more pictures of her isn't
[TS]
00:44:40
◼
►
he handsome man he's a very different
[TS]
00:44:43
◼
►
show but the point is that they weren't
[TS]
00:44:44
◼
►
you on the tour is at a place
[TS]
00:44:46
◼
►
yes you on the tour that's it right I
[TS]
00:44:48
◼
►
don't think we got a whole show about
[TS]
00:44:49
◼
►
this the point is that amounts to a
[TS]
00:44:51
◼
►
little bit friendlier than it is
[TS]
00:44:53
◼
►
ok maybe answer his own path to salon so
[TS]
00:44:57
◼
►
the point is that this dude is slipping
[TS]
00:45:00
◼
►
his fingers into his ladies fanny pack
[TS]
00:45:02
◼
►
and Scott who might as well have
[TS]
00:45:05
◼
►
lobbyists like dives onto this guy and
[TS]
00:45:08
◼
►
shoves him and I have to imagine you
[TS]
00:45:10
◼
►
know I don't think Scott's had a lot of
[TS]
00:45:11
◼
►
like taekwondo trot Simpson scott
[TS]
00:45:14
◼
►
simpson with it you know how small his
[TS]
00:45:15
◼
►
torso is you compare these are even with
[TS]
00:45:17
◼
►
his short sleeve scott simpson cardigan
[TS]
00:45:20
◼
►
down shirts
[TS]
00:45:21
◼
►
oh my god he was cardigans the way most
[TS]
00:45:23
◼
►
men where pride he sido one this gives a
[TS]
00:45:26
◼
►
small guy okay is a full head smaller
[TS]
00:45:28
◼
►
than Scott the point is i'm going to try
[TS]
00:45:29
◼
►
to get at
[TS]
00:45:30
◼
►
I had experiences like this unit
[TS]
00:45:31
◼
►
experiences like that Scott Simpson did
[TS]
00:45:33
◼
►
not get on a train a new limit or
[TS]
00:45:35
◼
►
planning to accidentally tap into
[TS]
00:45:37
◼
►
something much more primal than I wonder
[TS]
00:45:40
◼
►
when we can smoke next
[TS]
00:45:41
◼
►
you follow he got sudden access to
[TS]
00:45:44
◼
►
something you know like that whether
[TS]
00:45:45
◼
►
they eating red meat thing that
[TS]
00:45:47
◼
►
protecting the castle thing there are
[TS]
00:45:48
◼
►
these things that are therein us and
[TS]
00:45:50
◼
►
then I guess calling the primal seems a
[TS]
00:45:51
◼
►
little bit pop psychology but it doesn't
[TS]
00:45:53
◼
►
when you went away and again I'm not to
[TS]
00:45:55
◼
►
put too fine a point on you're sober
[TS]
00:45:57
◼
►
when this happened anyone but you know
[TS]
00:46:00
◼
►
like i said if you used to drink eight
[TS]
00:46:02
◼
►
hours a day and then you don't that
[TS]
00:46:03
◼
►
leaves a lot of time you see your mother
[TS]
00:46:06
◼
►
your mind must have been doing a lot of
[TS]
00:46:07
◼
►
catching up your you're a smart guy that
[TS]
00:46:09
◼
►
had a lot of catching up to do
[TS]
00:46:10
◼
►
right well after I mastered origami
[TS]
00:46:12
◼
►
there were only so many so many things I
[TS]
00:46:15
◼
►
could do with my hand did you get like a
[TS]
00:46:16
◼
►
library book her or that you have such
[TS]
00:46:18
◼
►
intense old way I'm gonna get you were
[TS]
00:46:20
◼
►
in a Shinto temple and no I'm a mother
[TS]
00:46:24
◼
►
and my girl hamachi i folded 1,000
[TS]
00:46:28
◼
►
cranes oh and that's why we have peace
[TS]
00:46:30
◼
►
now that's right that's exactly right
[TS]
00:46:32
◼
►
they call it the box / pehle nothing I'm
[TS]
00:46:37
◼
►
just I never mind you know what continue
[TS]
00:46:38
◼
►
i'm just saying that we sometimes get
[TS]
00:46:40
◼
►
sometimes I have a day where i get a lot
[TS]
00:46:42
◼
►
sometimes I have a day when I'm sad all
[TS]
00:46:43
◼
►
day and scott simpson had a day where
[TS]
00:46:45
◼
►
you fucking drove on some guy and some
[TS]
00:46:47
◼
►
tuvan dude right 10 ninja for for a
[TS]
00:46:50
◼
►
moment and then you probably just
[TS]
00:46:51
◼
►
shattered shook this place i would be no
[TS]
00:46:53
◼
►
i'm saying so you're looking you're
[TS]
00:46:54
◼
►
looking for whatever it is if I may say
[TS]
00:46:57
◼
►
you tell me this is read wrong you're
[TS]
00:46:58
◼
►
looking for whatever that little miasma
[TS]
00:47:00
◼
►
that little thing is that little Hyman
[TS]
00:47:02
◼
►
that stands between you and something
[TS]
00:47:05
◼
►
you're pretty sure is there inside of
[TS]
00:47:06
◼
►
you somewhere right but i want you want
[TS]
00:47:08
◼
►
i want i had plenty of instances where I
[TS]
00:47:12
◼
►
had a brief or or explosive access to
[TS]
00:47:18
◼
►
these people in me that I didn't that I
[TS]
00:47:21
◼
►
didn't have dealt with that will daily
[TS]
00:47:24
◼
►
contact with well you know but no i mean
[TS]
00:47:28
◼
►
so occasionally at will but more often i
[TS]
00:47:31
◼
►
had the scott simpson phenomenon where I
[TS]
00:47:33
◼
►
was walking around dressed like a frat
[TS]
00:47:36
◼
►
boy from 1961 and and then all of a
[TS]
00:47:40
◼
►
sudden I was a like a i was in full on
[TS]
00:47:44
◼
►
combat mode in a game like the Hulk but
[TS]
00:47:47
◼
►
I didn't want that
[TS]
00:47:48
◼
►
what I wanted was a constant well what I
[TS]
00:47:51
◼
►
wanted was constant conscious access
[TS]
00:47:54
◼
►
to that person wow that was prior to
[TS]
00:47:57
◼
►
that and and I don't just mean that you
[TS]
00:47:59
◼
►
know the guy I you know I wanted the
[TS]
00:48:03
◼
►
I've hilariously III later described it
[TS]
00:48:08
◼
►
as a kind of animal reflex and if and I
[TS]
00:48:11
◼
►
and I made the mistake of describing it
[TS]
00:48:13
◼
►
that way to a friend who a friend of
[TS]
00:48:16
◼
►
mine who now plays in duff mckagan band
[TS]
00:48:18
◼
►
who is not a person who you can say
[TS]
00:48:21
◼
►
something like animal reflexes around
[TS]
00:48:23
◼
►
without hearing it then from him a
[TS]
00:48:25
◼
►
thousand times so those the phrase now
[TS]
00:48:27
◼
►
has taken on a you're at it
[TS]
00:48:29
◼
►
yeah I regret ever saying it because he
[TS]
00:48:30
◼
►
was like oh animal reflexes are ya
[TS]
00:48:33
◼
►
why don't you use your animal reflexes
[TS]
00:48:34
◼
►
to go get us some more bacon nachos
[TS]
00:48:36
◼
►
haha that's important
[TS]
00:48:40
◼
►
yeah but there wasn't there certainly
[TS]
00:48:42
◼
►
was a time when after i had been walking
[TS]
00:48:45
◼
►
for many months in one direction where I
[TS]
00:48:49
◼
►
could I I'd be walking through a little
[TS]
00:48:51
◼
►
village and somebody would you would
[TS]
00:48:55
◼
►
cross my path 25 feet in front of me you
[TS]
00:49:00
◼
►
know they beheaded perpendicular to
[TS]
00:49:02
◼
►
where I was going and as I would walk
[TS]
00:49:04
◼
►
through their jet stream I could I could
[TS]
00:49:09
◼
►
smell them even though they were not the
[TS]
00:49:12
◼
►
way the way a dog can pick up like flop
[TS]
00:49:15
◼
►
well no I don't can you know that you
[TS]
00:49:17
◼
►
know that that's the reason dogs get
[TS]
00:49:19
◼
►
nervous sometimes is that they smell the
[TS]
00:49:21
◼
►
difference between regular sweat flop
[TS]
00:49:22
◼
►
sweat they know when somebody's anxious
[TS]
00:49:23
◼
►
and freaked them out
[TS]
00:49:24
◼
►
yeah yeah sure i'm sure that's true i
[TS]
00:49:26
◼
►
mean i-i i had i arrived at a place
[TS]
00:49:29
◼
►
where my senses were more acute because
[TS]
00:49:33
◼
►
there was not a thing that was because
[TS]
00:49:36
◼
►
they were being doled like they normally
[TS]
00:49:37
◼
►
were uh huh and I was hoping to find
[TS]
00:49:40
◼
►
that throughout myself not just that I
[TS]
00:49:44
◼
►
could smell more acutely and then I
[TS]
00:49:46
◼
►
could see and hear stuff better but that
[TS]
00:49:48
◼
►
that whatever-it-was existentially that
[TS]
00:49:52
◼
►
was doing me that thing where I had lost
[TS]
00:49:56
◼
►
my fear of the universe not because I
[TS]
00:49:58
◼
►
not because I had mastered my fear of
[TS]
00:50:02
◼
►
the universe but just because i had
[TS]
00:50:04
◼
►
blinded myself to the universe
[TS]
00:50:07
◼
►
I wanted to I wanted that dullness to be
[TS]
00:50:10
◼
►
uh-huh and a and because what i assumed
[TS]
00:50:15
◼
►
would replace it was acuity I thought
[TS]
00:50:17
◼
►
sharpness would would come back but the
[TS]
00:50:21
◼
►
problem is if you if you get to a point
[TS]
00:50:23
◼
►
where you can smell somebody from 20
[TS]
00:50:25
◼
►
feet away
[TS]
00:50:26
◼
►
you cannot live in a city very well you
[TS]
00:50:29
◼
►
know what I mean like that all it's
[TS]
00:50:31
◼
►
almost like you're back from the shit
[TS]
00:50:32
◼
►
it's a maladaptive to live in your life
[TS]
00:50:35
◼
►
that you know you talk about the guys on
[TS]
00:50:36
◼
►
this is true but the cliché as you come
[TS]
00:50:37
◼
►
back from Nam and you're like you wake
[TS]
00:50:39
◼
►
up and you're reaching for the gun right
[TS]
00:50:41
◼
►
for years you're like listen and listen
[TS]
00:50:43
◼
►
for wrestling you're walking around in
[TS]
00:50:45
◼
►
its in a city and you are picking up way
[TS]
00:50:47
◼
►
more information than you want like you
[TS]
00:50:49
◼
►
don't need to
[TS]
00:50:51
◼
►
you don't need to be smelling all these
[TS]
00:50:53
◼
►
people you know like if you're out if
[TS]
00:50:56
◼
►
you're sleeping out in the woods by
[TS]
00:50:57
◼
►
yourself and you have the ability to
[TS]
00:50:59
◼
►
smell somebody or hear something yeah
[TS]
00:51:00
◼
►
I'm far off
[TS]
00:51:01
◼
►
that's very can actually i'm guessing
[TS]
00:51:03
◼
►
you can make him less effective because
[TS]
00:51:05
◼
►
now you've got a bad signal to noise
[TS]
00:51:06
◼
►
ratio for threats exactly you're not
[TS]
00:51:08
◼
►
separating the wheat from the chaff very
[TS]
00:51:10
◼
►
well I remember the first time i was i
[TS]
00:51:13
◼
►
was in the Czech Republic I was
[TS]
00:51:15
◼
►
approaching prague and out and a jet
[TS]
00:51:18
◼
►
airplane flew over me and it had been a
[TS]
00:51:22
◼
►
it been a week since i had been in a
[TS]
00:51:27
◼
►
underair airplane traffic and I was in
[TS]
00:51:32
◼
►
the middle of Europe right i mean i
[TS]
00:51:33
◼
►
wasn't it's not like I was out in the
[TS]
00:51:35
◼
►
out in the Sudan I was in the middle of
[TS]
00:51:37
◼
►
Europe but because i was traveling on
[TS]
00:51:39
◼
►
foot i became aware of that those times
[TS]
00:51:44
◼
►
when I just wasn't under jet traffic it
[TS]
00:51:46
◼
►
wasn't i mean if if there were jets they
[TS]
00:51:48
◼
►
were flying at 35,000 feet they weren't
[TS]
00:51:50
◼
►
they weren't right overhead or they
[TS]
00:51:53
◼
►
weren't you know on approach and I
[TS]
00:51:57
◼
►
couldn't believe the noise that jets
[TS]
00:51:59
◼
►
make you know it it seemed to me like it
[TS]
00:52:01
◼
►
was rattling the whole it was rattling
[TS]
00:52:04
◼
►
the countryside it was it was deafening
[TS]
00:52:07
◼
►
and of course you can't live like that
[TS]
00:52:11
◼
►
if I if I felt like that right now where
[TS]
00:52:13
◼
►
i live here in my house up the scamp
[TS]
00:52:16
◼
►
have from an airport I thought it would
[TS]
00:52:18
◼
►
be I would go crazy for scott simpson
[TS]
00:52:20
◼
►
was right next to the airport to I know
[TS]
00:52:22
◼
►
he doesn't he keeps inviting me to come
[TS]
00:52:23
◼
►
stay with him and I'm like he's gonna
[TS]
00:52:24
◼
►
have to get too hot tubs where you sit
[TS]
00:52:27
◼
►
and smell the jet fuel come off of SFO
[TS]
00:52:29
◼
►
the hot tubs alright if it is right next
[TS]
00:52:32
◼
►
to an airport that's right still more
[TS]
00:52:34
◼
►
like that not you know again this is the
[TS]
00:52:36
◼
►
thing John what you're describing it now
[TS]
00:52:38
◼
►
you're getting to a level that i can
[TS]
00:52:39
◼
►
almost understand what you're talking
[TS]
00:52:41
◼
►
about the security right there's that
[TS]
00:52:43
◼
►
there's this thing where like you
[TS]
00:52:46
◼
►
probably don't have things that annoy
[TS]
00:52:47
◼
►
you but if you ever had and you haven't
[TS]
00:52:49
◼
►
had a lot of office jobs i'm guessing
[TS]
00:52:50
◼
►
bill even had a lot of things in order
[TS]
00:52:51
◼
►
really can we quit diary that because i
[TS]
00:52:53
◼
►
like to come back to that
[TS]
00:52:54
◼
►
ok let's personal journal it's okay but
[TS]
00:52:58
◼
►
you're talking about office job will
[TS]
00:52:59
◼
►
think about this this is a very obvious
[TS]
00:53:01
◼
►
intent to use this word for the second
[TS]
00:53:03
◼
►
time this week whitney an example but if
[TS]
00:53:04
◼
►
somebody then at the next desk does
[TS]
00:53:06
◼
►
something that drives me nuts right
[TS]
00:53:08
◼
►
listens to the radio just just a little
[TS]
00:53:10
◼
►
bit too low right we'll said that I
[TS]
00:53:12
◼
►
could listen to the radio recently after
[TS]
00:53:14
◼
►
was my stapler
[TS]
00:53:15
◼
►
that's funny movie but I got you know
[TS]
00:53:17
◼
►
the one that would always get me is in
[TS]
00:53:19
◼
►
this is the thing is I'm not the kind of
[TS]
00:53:21
◼
►
guy that sweats this but once i start
[TS]
00:53:23
◼
►
noticing a certain way that someone
[TS]
00:53:27
◼
►
choose or drinks and let's be honest I
[TS]
00:53:30
◼
►
you know I i can tell you there's five
[TS]
00:53:32
◼
►
nines level of like I never noticed this
[TS]
00:53:34
◼
►
but once I do notice said I can't stop
[TS]
00:53:37
◼
►
noticing it and I can't stop thinking
[TS]
00:53:39
◼
►
about it it should be the easiest thing
[TS]
00:53:41
◼
►
in the world for me to just not even
[TS]
00:53:42
◼
►
notice it anymore
[TS]
00:53:43
◼
►
international Bates loud chewing is I
[TS]
00:53:46
◼
►
don't sit on the show before but my
[TS]
00:53:48
◼
►
stepfather who was the worst person
[TS]
00:53:49
◼
►
who's ever lived
[TS]
00:53:50
◼
►
I think I told you this this is how he
[TS]
00:53:51
◼
►
drinks coffee ready for these dead now
[TS]
00:53:53
◼
►
thank God but this Hydra coffee every
[TS]
00:53:56
◼
►
day for the years that we were with him
[TS]
00:53:58
◼
►
it was like this
[TS]
00:54:01
◼
►
yeah yeah it's terrible
[TS]
00:54:09
◼
►
ok so I'm 12 right I got straight A's
[TS]
00:54:13
◼
►
I should rely been asked out i played
[TS]
00:54:16
◼
►
Little League I met Pete Rose twice i
[TS]
00:54:18
◼
►
should be able all I met Steve Garvey
[TS]
00:54:21
◼
►
i'm at the 79 Dodgers buddy i should be
[TS]
00:54:24
◼
►
able to put that out of my mind but
[TS]
00:54:26
◼
►
right but I can't and now in fact
[TS]
00:54:28
◼
►
I'm a temple grandin now that is
[TS]
00:54:30
◼
►
deafening to me i can't stop hearing it
[TS]
00:54:33
◼
►
right it sounds like he's gleeking in
[TS]
00:54:35
◼
►
our context
[TS]
00:54:37
◼
►
uh-huh you XP create this a speech was a
[TS]
00:54:40
◼
►
week I can't do as well as they used to
[TS]
00:54:43
◼
►
i can you thinking I could shoot fluids
[TS]
00:54:45
◼
►
on my body so much more efficiently when
[TS]
00:54:46
◼
►
I was seventeen you know what I have
[TS]
00:54:48
◼
►
never been able to Gleek my spell dude I
[TS]
00:54:51
◼
►
I you know what I did I I woodshed it i
[TS]
00:54:55
◼
►
spent a lot of time practicing caught
[TS]
00:54:57
◼
►
sneaking around from clicking clicking
[TS]
00:54:59
◼
►
oh yeah most people recognize that as
[TS]
00:55:02
◼
►
the thing they accidentally did on their
[TS]
00:55:03
◼
►
Dennis face when they're in the chair
[TS]
00:55:06
◼
►
now my little girl Gleeks all the time
[TS]
00:55:08
◼
►
she don't even know what she's doing she
[TS]
00:55:09
◼
►
doesn't realize what a skilled in some
[TS]
00:55:11
◼
►
looked it up on urban dictionary i had a
[TS]
00:55:13
◼
►
friend that used to practice when he was
[TS]
00:55:15
◼
►
a kid he would stand in the hallway of
[TS]
00:55:16
◼
►
his grandmother's house and he would
[TS]
00:55:17
◼
►
flip guitar picks at the mirror I like
[TS]
00:55:20
◼
►
Rick Nielson yeah at the mirror down at
[TS]
00:55:22
◼
►
the end of the hall he would just sit
[TS]
00:55:24
◼
►
for hours at a time just flicking guitar
[TS]
00:55:26
◼
►
picks himself never do anything like
[TS]
00:55:29
◼
►
no you're kidding what about the after i
[TS]
00:55:31
◼
►
saw that episode happy days where the
[TS]
00:55:33
◼
►
guy in the contest for snatching
[TS]
00:55:35
◼
►
quarters off your elbow
[TS]
00:55:36
◼
►
I found out that not only did I try to
[TS]
00:55:38
◼
►
do that for six weeks but my lady did
[TS]
00:55:39
◼
►
the same thing without orders we were we
[TS]
00:55:42
◼
►
were not rich people but i would take
[TS]
00:55:43
◼
►
you never lose you stack up you stuck-up
[TS]
00:55:45
◼
►
imagine look at me look at my arm I'm
[TS]
00:55:47
◼
►
stacking up pennies on my own life my
[TS]
00:55:49
◼
►
90-degree out like you know I know I
[TS]
00:55:52
◼
►
know what you're talking about with the
[TS]
00:55:53
◼
►
episode you whip it and you grab the
[TS]
00:55:55
◼
►
stack again as far as he was really good
[TS]
00:55:58
◼
►
no i never did never worked on a scale
[TS]
00:55:59
◼
►
like that well I taught myself to juggle
[TS]
00:56:02
◼
►
because I wanted because I was always
[TS]
00:56:04
◼
►
looking for the thing that would amaze
[TS]
00:56:06
◼
►
village children you know this is the
[TS]
00:56:12
◼
►
thing it's just a little taste of
[TS]
00:56:15
◼
►
infinity
[TS]
00:56:15
◼
►
how is he doing that how is he making
[TS]
00:56:18
◼
►
the balls almost in the air so many at
[TS]
00:56:21
◼
►
yeah if you need me i have shoes if
[TS]
00:56:24
◼
►
there's been any time outside of the
[TS]
00:56:25
◼
►
place where you were born you realize
[TS]
00:56:28
◼
►
that entertaining groups of children
[TS]
00:56:29
◼
►
this inverted lark our earth becomes it
[TS]
00:56:33
◼
►
becomes a very crucial skill because
[TS]
00:56:35
◼
►
little little groups of children will
[TS]
00:56:37
◼
►
packs of kids
[TS]
00:56:38
◼
►
yeah are the that is the main feature of
[TS]
00:56:41
◼
►
most of the world
[TS]
00:56:42
◼
►
if you are a stranger and you walk into
[TS]
00:56:44
◼
►
it into a small town with all the adults
[TS]
00:56:46
◼
►
will pretend that they have seen the
[TS]
00:56:50
◼
►
likes of you a million times
[TS]
00:56:51
◼
►
yeah running on a rail well no they kind
[TS]
00:56:53
◼
►
of go back to drinking their coffee and
[TS]
00:56:55
◼
►
looking at you over the tops of their
[TS]
00:56:56
◼
►
newspapers I mince words if you show up
[TS]
00:56:58
◼
►
in town with it the idea of delighting
[TS]
00:57:00
◼
►
children i think adults are going to
[TS]
00:57:01
◼
►
look askance well no this is the finger
[TS]
00:57:03
◼
►
that you don't show up with the idea of
[TS]
00:57:05
◼
►
delighting children shots you're just
[TS]
00:57:07
◼
►
looking for refreshment and maybe a
[TS]
00:57:09
◼
►
chance to sleep in the hayloft but ok so
[TS]
00:57:12
◼
►
if you're looking at you're looking for
[TS]
00:57:14
◼
►
the local the local I you know the
[TS]
00:57:16
◼
►
winches and the right address and stuff
[TS]
00:57:18
◼
►
like take me to the mayor of your town
[TS]
00:57:20
◼
►
I'm a visitor from far away but the kids
[TS]
00:57:23
◼
►
in different places are they do not have
[TS]
00:57:26
◼
►
that shyness they don't they are not
[TS]
00:57:28
◼
►
trying to be who didn't gather in the
[TS]
00:57:30
◼
►
Town Square to take batteries pleasure
[TS]
00:57:32
◼
►
and your big point and make talk and
[TS]
00:57:34
◼
►
they go oh look at this
[TS]
00:57:37
◼
►
well in my case long-haired blonde who
[TS]
00:57:40
◼
►
like extremely large monster who has
[TS]
00:57:44
◼
►
come from a faraway place and so if the
[TS]
00:57:46
◼
►
kids are standing around you that
[TS]
00:57:48
◼
►
initially the kids are not always
[TS]
00:57:50
◼
►
friendly they're like there they are
[TS]
00:57:52
◼
►
there they're suspicious they are scared
[TS]
00:57:55
◼
►
and if you spook them then you lose that
[TS]
00:57:58
◼
►
all the adults are watching you of
[TS]
00:57:59
◼
►
course and you lose everyone's
[TS]
00:58:01
◼
►
friendship if you spook the kids so you
[TS]
00:58:04
◼
►
have to have something you have to have
[TS]
00:58:05
◼
►
a magic trick you have to have something
[TS]
00:58:07
◼
►
where you can you're surrounded by kids
[TS]
00:58:09
◼
►
you can't pretend you're not and they
[TS]
00:58:13
◼
►
are there watching very intently you
[TS]
00:58:15
◼
►
have to have to be able to pull
[TS]
00:58:16
◼
►
something out of your bag or or perform
[TS]
00:58:19
◼
►
some kind of like what went well and the
[TS]
00:58:22
◼
►
kids then you win the kids over and then
[TS]
00:58:25
◼
►
everybody relaxes and everybody goes
[TS]
00:58:27
◼
►
back to like drinking their coffee but
[TS]
00:58:30
◼
►
but you can feel like right the town
[TS]
00:58:33
◼
►
goes ok this collectively exhales this
[TS]
00:58:35
◼
►
guy's obviously not not a not a threat
[TS]
00:58:38
◼
►
yeah he looks like a freak but he just
[TS]
00:58:39
◼
►
juggled like three Roxy picked up off
[TS]
00:58:42
◼
►
the square and now the kids are
[TS]
00:58:44
◼
►
following now they'll jump behind like
[TS]
00:58:46
◼
►
you start to walk in the kids all
[TS]
00:58:48
◼
►
yeah I i know that at this point then
[TS]
00:58:50
◼
►
you can sell everybody in the town
[TS]
00:58:52
◼
►
on having a marching band and he saw the
[TS]
00:58:54
◼
►
musical instruments that you can you can
[TS]
00:58:56
◼
►
type the rats out of Ireland you can do
[TS]
00:58:58
◼
►
whatever it is that you want to go on to
[TS]
00:58:59
◼
►
play pool but and this is the thing this
[TS]
00:59:02
◼
►
is why even though David Blaine is a
[TS]
00:59:05
◼
►
terrible terrible monster
[TS]
00:59:07
◼
►
this one is still this is going so well
[TS]
00:59:09
◼
►
I always admired his ability with those
[TS]
00:59:12
◼
►
tricks to like go to foreign places and
[TS]
00:59:16
◼
►
he would do you know do magic which is
[TS]
00:59:19
◼
►
the universal don't think those are set
[TS]
00:59:21
◼
►
up bits
[TS]
00:59:21
◼
►
oh he's terrible and those two that
[TS]
00:59:23
◼
►
shows terrible and they're totally set
[TS]
00:59:24
◼
►
up a lot of Penn & Teller tricks that
[TS]
00:59:26
◼
►
are pretty mind-blowing until you
[TS]
00:59:27
◼
►
realize that bits
[TS]
00:59:28
◼
►
yeah if I just if I had just worked up
[TS]
00:59:30
◼
►
like three or four like card dice tricks
[TS]
00:59:33
◼
►
or something i would have been better
[TS]
00:59:34
◼
►
off as a human being
[TS]
00:59:36
◼
►
I'm actually pretty dedicated packing
[TS]
00:59:38
◼
►
light and we talked before about the
[TS]
00:59:39
◼
►
don't arrest gonna attack of cards
[TS]
00:59:43
◼
►
one-time mistake you have to carry
[TS]
00:59:46
◼
►
things the juggler you find local things
[TS]
00:59:47
◼
►
find local things like you might find
[TS]
00:59:49
◼
►
things that are right there on the
[TS]
00:59:50
◼
►
ground you pick stuff up off the ground
[TS]
00:59:52
◼
►
and juggle them that is a that is a
[TS]
00:59:54
◼
►
winning strategy localized the two it's
[TS]
00:59:57
◼
►
like saying how they're doing tonight
[TS]
00:59:58
◼
►
cleveland oh that's right it's nice here
[TS]
00:59:58
◼
►
cleveland oh that's right it's nice here
[TS]
01:00:00
◼
►
stones I'm thrilling to the infinite
[TS]
01:00:01
◼
►
your rocks
[TS]
01:00:03
◼
►
exactly exactly you didn't even you
[TS]
01:00:05
◼
►
don't even look at these rocks to you
[TS]
01:00:07
◼
►
didn't even see these rocks they've been
[TS]
01:00:08
◼
►
sitting here the whole time but did you
[TS]
01:00:10
◼
►
know they can fly
[TS]
01:00:11
◼
►
yeah the other thing that the other
[TS]
01:00:15
◼
►
thing about me that holds me in good
[TS]
01:00:17
◼
►
stead with people around the world is
[TS]
01:00:18
◼
►
that I am NOT embarrassed to break into
[TS]
01:00:21
◼
►
a spontaneous interpretive dance is that
[TS]
01:00:26
◼
►
right so if I'm surrounded by kids and I
[TS]
01:00:29
◼
►
cannot either find three rocks or if
[TS]
01:00:33
◼
►
they are not impressed by me juggling
[TS]
01:00:35
◼
►
three rocks because in some cultures you
[TS]
01:00:37
◼
►
know everybody can juggle three rocks
[TS]
01:00:39
◼
►
I can't work right is it is it is it
[TS]
01:00:43
◼
►
like a cheeky dance is it is it a kind
[TS]
01:00:45
◼
►
of is an interpretive folk dance or are
[TS]
01:00:47
◼
►
you repurposing something from the West
[TS]
01:00:49
◼
►
i will start off I thought of it it's
[TS]
01:00:52
◼
►
got stages start out slowly with a
[TS]
01:00:54
◼
►
little bit of like a it's not a narc a
[TS]
01:00:57
◼
►
white guy shuffle where I'm like boo
[TS]
01:00:58
◼
►
back-to-back-to-back and everybody at
[TS]
01:01:02
◼
►
this point is looking at me very
[TS]
01:01:04
◼
►
suspiciously like what we making that
[TS]
01:01:07
◼
►
little musical noise y-yeah the Motown
[TS]
01:01:10
◼
►
you back and I'm just kind of like doing
[TS]
01:01:12
◼
►
the white guy had Bob right and then I
[TS]
01:01:16
◼
►
start to get to pick up the pace a
[TS]
01:01:18
◼
►
little bit will come back to back to
[TS]
01:01:21
◼
►
back to back and then everybody's like
[TS]
01:01:23
◼
►
what you like doing that plane moving by
[TS]
01:01:25
◼
►
even know what I'm a little bit but
[TS]
01:01:27
◼
►
moving a little bit of side-to-side foot
[TS]
01:01:29
◼
►
shuffle but the shoulders back and forth
[TS]
01:01:31
◼
►
and then just when they think like okay
[TS]
01:01:34
◼
►
what's he selling here then i go into
[TS]
01:01:39
◼
►
full-on Swan Lake ballet one foot your
[TS]
01:01:44
◼
►
arch back one foot way up in the air
[TS]
01:01:46
◼
►
hands out making up making a wing like a
[TS]
01:01:49
◼
►
swan and then i'm spyler nice i spin
[TS]
01:01:52
◼
►
i leap and you can you there's no
[TS]
01:01:56
◼
►
there's no village square in the world
[TS]
01:01:58
◼
►
that isn't it isn't immediately won over
[TS]
01:02:02
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by this performance it's not no one's
[TS]
01:02:05
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expecting it's not I it isn't i can say
[TS]
01:02:08
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with confidence it is not anything
[TS]
01:02:10
◼
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anyone has ever seen yea I'm guessing is
[TS]
01:02:12
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not something a lot of people there
[TS]
01:02:13
◼
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you in the council is not something it's
[TS]
01:02:15
◼
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not something that strangers come
[TS]
01:02:16
◼
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through town and do your typical like
[TS]
01:02:18
◼
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two german guys on BMW BMW like off-road
[TS]
01:02:24
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by except pooping and hitting each other
[TS]
01:02:25
◼
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get dressed head-to-toe in like leather
[TS]
01:02:28
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these guys aren't doing that you're
[TS]
01:02:30
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you're you're here you're Americans you
[TS]
01:02:33
◼
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know working for the NSA who come
[TS]
01:02:36
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through and adjust the radio frequencies
[TS]
01:02:38
◼
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on the teacher read their they're not
[TS]
01:02:41
◼
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doing it but dance and John Denison John
[TS]
01:02:44
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comes to town
[TS]
01:02:45
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yeah and i was eating different River
[TS]
01:02:47
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baby that's been there before you has
[TS]
01:02:49
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been fucking juggling stuff they found
[TS]
01:02:50
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on the ground
[TS]
01:02:51
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this is going to be very refreshing to
[TS]
01:02:53
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them yeah because because a certain
[TS]
01:02:55
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amount of shamelessness right everybody
[TS]
01:02:58
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carries around so much shame all the
[TS]
01:03:00
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time who human beings across the world
[TS]
01:03:02
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walking around with a common desire not
[TS]
01:03:05
◼
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to be embarrassed not to look like an
[TS]
01:03:08
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asshole and if you if you leave that
[TS]
01:03:11
◼
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shame behind and you are willing to say
[TS]
01:03:13
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i am going to be a complete fool for you
[TS]
01:03:16
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right now I'm gonna be I'm going to show
[TS]
01:03:18
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you what a clown looks like it's the
[TS]
01:03:22
◼
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Jerry Lewis phenomenon right
[TS]
01:03:24
◼
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no one hates Jerry Lewis until you get
[TS]
01:03:27
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to know him right
[TS]
01:03:28
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and you do this little you do this thing
[TS]
01:03:30
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and you have you have said you have
[TS]
01:03:32
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basically said I am I mean it's not just
[TS]
01:03:35
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that I'm harmless it is that I am I am
[TS]
01:03:39
◼
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fun and I am certain there to a certain
[TS]
01:03:43
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I'm shameless and that shamelessness is
[TS]
01:03:47
◼
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something that is very disarming right
[TS]
01:03:50
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if you are there too if you were there
[TS]
01:03:52
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to capture and their children that you
[TS]
01:03:54
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were not there was nothing puts people
[TS]
01:03:58
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at ease as much as knowing that there's
[TS]
01:04:00
◼
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nothing this person won't do haha go
[TS]
01:04:05
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ahead kids enjoy the candy haha yeah
[TS]
01:04:08
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there's a reason i'm in your town
[TS]
01:04:09
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because i was run out of the last down
[TS]
01:04:11
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and the town before the town where I was
[TS]
01:04:13
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written sandal marks on your ass
[TS]
01:04:18
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well I I can't explain it except to say
[TS]
01:04:22
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that it's worked for me many many times
[TS]
01:04:24
◼
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what about the mystery spot you're in
[TS]
01:04:25
◼
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the mystery spot
[TS]
01:04:27
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where's the mystery spot Mystery Spot
[TS]
01:04:28
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think it's down near that on a girl's
[TS]
01:04:30
◼
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body you mean well we please talk about
[TS]
01:04:32
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like ladies and windows
[TS]
01:04:34
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I was thinking the place in santa cruz I
[TS]
01:04:35
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think you've been there you go and your
[TS]
01:04:37
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opinion park on a hill and the
[TS]
01:04:38
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mysterious things happen to find gravity
[TS]
01:04:40
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and there's a spot like that in Oregon
[TS]
01:04:43
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where it looks like your car's pointed
[TS]
01:04:46
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up hill but it actually rolls on its own
[TS]
01:04:49
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yeah I think same principle problem yeah
[TS]
01:04:51
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it's a it's always up the whole solution
[TS]
01:04:56
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i think that the thing about girls and
[TS]
01:04:59
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windows catching a lot of girls in
[TS]
01:05:01
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Windows I've only ever fallen in love
[TS]
01:05:03
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with with two girls and one
[TS]
01:05:08
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yeah I'm gonna let you go i'll continue
[TS]
01:05:12
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continue falling in love with two girls
[TS]
01:05:15
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and windows all right
[TS]
01:05:16
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one time I was I was I was I was I have
[TS]
01:05:19
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had an injured and I was hobbling i was
[TS]
01:05:24
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walking I didn't have a cane but I was
[TS]
01:05:25
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walking very slowly honor on an injured
[TS]
01:05:28
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leg walking through this town and I look
[TS]
01:05:32
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up and there the girls in windows with
[TS]
01:05:34
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the red lights and they're in there you
[TS]
01:05:36
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know comical lingerie and I you know I
[TS]
01:05:40
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look up and I see the girls and I'm not
[TS]
01:05:41
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moving I'm not moving at the pace of
[TS]
01:05:43
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other people on the sidewalk i am i'm
[TS]
01:05:45
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limping along so I'm moving slowly and I
[TS]
01:05:47
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look up at the girls and they're looking
[TS]
01:05:49
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down on me and they give me the pic of
[TS]
01:05:52
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me the hooker sympathy
[TS]
01:05:54
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you know what I mean like the all look
[TS]
01:05:57
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at the poor guy is that an international
[TS]
01:05:59
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concept for sympathy yeah the fucker
[TS]
01:06:01
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sympathy after the time when you when
[TS]
01:06:03
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you engage the services of a hooker
[TS]
01:06:05
◼
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you're just looking for female sympathy
[TS]
01:06:07
◼
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amen and so peace these girls in the
[TS]
01:06:10
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windows are you know they they take a
[TS]
01:06:12
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break from their vamping and they're
[TS]
01:06:14
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like mama LA and and they they they get
[TS]
01:06:18
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►
a little bit human and they're looking
[TS]
01:06:19
◼
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at me through the glass of their windows
[TS]
01:06:21
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and they're going all look at the poor
[TS]
01:06:22
◼
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little limper and I look up and I'm not
[TS]
01:06:26
◼
►
I'm not moving fast enough that I can do
[TS]
01:06:28
◼
►
what you what I normally do which is be
[TS]
01:06:30
◼
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like just dance
[TS]
01:06:31
◼
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hello next to see you no threat t it
[TS]
01:06:34
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watch my chick chick wanted me to boom
[TS]
01:06:42
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boy we got here together got a coke can
[TS]
01:06:45
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haha so I don't juggle I don't dance huh
[TS]
01:06:50
◼
►
and I'm moving too slowly to be like me
[TS]
01:06:53
◼
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nicely and keep going and so I look at
[TS]
01:06:55
◼
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what I'm like oh hi yeah I know
[TS]
01:06:57
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limping and limping a little bit further
[TS]
01:07:00
◼
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and they're like horse sweetheart you
[TS]
01:07:02
◼
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know and kind of poetic petting my hair
[TS]
01:07:04
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through the window glass and I'm like
[TS]
01:07:06
◼
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yeah yeah that's right him I'm hurt I'm
[TS]
01:07:08
◼
►
injured and they start doing the like
[TS]
01:07:11
◼
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you should come in you should come in
[TS]
01:07:12
◼
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back is attractively moving finger
[TS]
01:07:14
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►
toward them
[TS]
01:07:16
◼
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yeah yeah but not but they're not trying
[TS]
01:07:17
◼
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to be sexy at this point they're trying
[TS]
01:07:19
◼
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to be like me sadly some sarjana they
[TS]
01:07:21
◼
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seated are they doing a very a very
[TS]
01:07:23
◼
►
slight little like 60 stance like what
[TS]
01:07:26
◼
►
are they on a pole like had it seems
[TS]
01:07:28
◼
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like they're getting comfortable
[TS]
01:07:29
◼
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standing in the window that you know
[TS]
01:07:30
◼
►
them like a bank at what do they do it
[TS]
01:07:32
◼
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is I think uncomfortable us to stand
[TS]
01:07:35
◼
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semi-naked in the window i usually
[TS]
01:07:39
◼
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here's what here's the the setup in in
[TS]
01:07:41
◼
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Amsterdam they have a each girl has a
[TS]
01:07:43
◼
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window it's a full-length window huh
[TS]
01:07:46
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yeah because that's the style of the
[TS]
01:07:48
◼
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construction of the old build is like a
[TS]
01:07:51
◼
►
storefront like recent macys Christmas
[TS]
01:07:53
◼
►
display
[TS]
01:07:53
◼
►
no it's like it's like good in the
[TS]
01:07:56
◼
►
netherlands by cancer areas my terrarium
[TS]
01:07:57
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it in the other ones they built a very
[TS]
01:08:01
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tall houses tall skinny houses right and
[TS]
01:08:04
◼
►
the reason for this is that back in the
[TS]
01:08:07
◼
►
back in olden times the King decided
[TS]
01:08:13
◼
►
that he was going to tax your house
[TS]
01:08:16
◼
►
based on how wide it was along the
[TS]
01:08:19
◼
►
street to Housing Act and so they built
[TS]
01:08:22
◼
►
I think like i see like comically narrow
[TS]
01:08:24
◼
►
and like three stories high comically
[TS]
01:08:26
◼
►
narrow and seven stories high
[TS]
01:08:28
◼
►
really really really steep little like
[TS]
01:08:31
◼
►
ship stairs like when you're going up
[TS]
01:08:33
◼
►
and down the stairs in a dutch house
[TS]
01:08:35
◼
►
it's basically like you're going up and
[TS]
01:08:36
◼
►
down like a convenient that you like I
[TS]
01:08:38
◼
►
family if you had to if you had to hide
[TS]
01:08:41
◼
►
a family in the roof to families really
[TS]
01:08:42
◼
►
to tell ya there would be a roof there
[TS]
01:08:44
◼
►
okay um and then the foot
[TS]
01:08:47
◼
►
front windows of these Dutch houses are
[TS]
01:08:50
◼
►
very tall because the has a tall and the
[TS]
01:08:53
◼
►
rooms are they were built during a time
[TS]
01:08:55
◼
►
when people understood that you need
[TS]
01:08:56
◼
►
15-foot ceilings in order to feel human
[TS]
01:08:59
◼
►
god bless them in a house not like now
[TS]
01:09:01
◼
►
we put seven foot ceilings in a place
[TS]
01:09:04
◼
►
and staple it together inside and act
[TS]
01:09:06
◼
►
like that's acceptable
[TS]
01:09:07
◼
►
yeah act like that's a house anyway so
[TS]
01:09:09
◼
►
they have these big tall windows and
[TS]
01:09:11
◼
►
generally the girls are not on the
[TS]
01:09:13
◼
►
ground floor but they are on the second
[TS]
01:09:16
◼
►
floor so they're above the street there
[TS]
01:09:18
◼
►
looking down at you for sending effect
[TS]
01:09:20
◼
►
right and each girl has her own window
[TS]
01:09:23
◼
►
and they have they've built a kind of
[TS]
01:09:26
◼
►
like large closet or boudoir kind of
[TS]
01:09:31
◼
►
place where there's a chair so they can
[TS]
01:09:33
◼
►
sit in the chair if they want to sit in
[TS]
01:09:34
◼
►
the chair there are some you know some
[TS]
01:09:37
◼
►
velvet curtains or whatever it's meant
[TS]
01:09:39
◼
►
to look it's meant to evoke kind of
[TS]
01:09:40
◼
►
somewhat like a like a like a like a
[TS]
01:09:45
◼
►
joke version of luxury and the girls sit
[TS]
01:09:48
◼
►
there and they're wearing a hat Eddie
[TS]
01:09:50
◼
►
and maybe some thigh-high stockings with
[TS]
01:09:53
◼
►
the garter belt ma and make try and they
[TS]
01:09:57
◼
►
try and they try and gauge the men who
[TS]
01:10:00
◼
►
are walking past their their their job
[TS]
01:10:03
◼
►
is to gauge your interest by how you are
[TS]
01:10:05
◼
►
looking at them and then at with a very
[TS]
01:10:08
◼
►
quick kind of assessment decide what is
[TS]
01:10:10
◼
►
the most seductive posture to strike
[TS]
01:10:13
◼
►
right like if you are looking at them
[TS]
01:10:16
◼
►
you're obviously shopping and what type
[TS]
01:10:18
◼
►
of man are you are you that said that
[TS]
01:10:21
◼
►
silently with only their what they
[TS]
01:10:23
◼
►
decided to do with their body their face
[TS]
01:10:25
◼
►
and their movements they need to very
[TS]
01:10:27
◼
►
quickly assess what's going on what's
[TS]
01:10:29
◼
►
going to make the sale right and they
[TS]
01:10:31
◼
►
don't want to give away too much because
[TS]
01:10:32
◼
►
I think there are a lot of creeps and
[TS]
01:10:34
◼
►
amsterdam we just stand on the sidewalk
[TS]
01:10:35
◼
►
and look at girls in the window right so
[TS]
01:10:37
◼
►
we're not going to turn around and give
[TS]
01:10:38
◼
►
you like some kind of ass play it should
[TS]
01:10:41
◼
►
go she could potentially put on some
[TS]
01:10:43
◼
►
very high doc martens put on some big
[TS]
01:10:46
◼
►
glasses sit down start reading a book
[TS]
01:10:47
◼
►
and look a lot more Jewish for example
[TS]
01:10:49
◼
►
oh my god i see this is what happened to
[TS]
01:10:51
◼
►
mix up the red light and puts on the
[TS]
01:10:53
◼
►
kind of like you have a coffee shop i'm
[TS]
01:10:54
◼
►
going to get to this I'm gonna get today
[TS]
01:10:56
◼
►
so anyway this this this was the first
[TS]
01:10:58
◼
►
time I thought love was I'm limping past
[TS]
01:11:00
◼
►
these girls
[TS]
01:11:01
◼
►
the girls are all beckoning and there's
[TS]
01:11:03
◼
►
one of these girls and most of the time
[TS]
01:11:05
◼
►
i'm not i'm not susceptible to this kind
[TS]
01:11:07
◼
►
of fake I do not like red Teddy's for
[TS]
01:11:10
◼
►
instance it's not like red lingerie and
[TS]
01:11:13
◼
►
let's just say that I don't like what
[TS]
01:11:15
◼
►
not what I don't like too much makeup I
[TS]
01:11:17
◼
►
don't like the look of a woman who is
[TS]
01:11:19
◼
►
trying to be a prostitute who but
[TS]
01:11:22
◼
►
there's this one girl in the window
[TS]
01:11:24
◼
►
there and she's not making a big show of
[TS]
01:11:27
◼
►
like beckoning she's actually looking me
[TS]
01:11:29
◼
►
in the eyes and say and communicating
[TS]
01:11:31
◼
►
with her eyes
[TS]
01:11:32
◼
►
hey come on come on in well let me take
[TS]
01:11:36
◼
►
care of you and I was I was frozen in my
[TS]
01:11:40
◼
►
tracks and I looked up at him and I'm
[TS]
01:11:45
◼
►
and I I have all this is the this
[TS]
01:11:47
◼
►
primordial feeling of like I want you to
[TS]
01:11:49
◼
►
take care of me that is what I need
[TS]
01:11:51
◼
►
right now I am alone in a strange place
[TS]
01:11:53
◼
►
and I have an injury and I am cold
[TS]
01:11:56
◼
►
actually now that you mention it and and
[TS]
01:11:58
◼
►
my socks are damp and apply that I want
[TS]
01:12:02
◼
►
to be cared for in this way that you are
[TS]
01:12:04
◼
►
suggesting with your eyes and all the
[TS]
01:12:07
◼
►
other girls who are in the windows next
[TS]
01:12:11
◼
►
to you I they all disappeared and i
[TS]
01:12:13
◼
►
would just had this tunnel vision of
[TS]
01:12:15
◼
►
this one girl and of course you know my
[TS]
01:12:18
◼
►
response was then I like shyly looked
[TS]
01:12:21
◼
►
away and hobbled off up the street
[TS]
01:12:24
◼
►
I think I think that part of me thinking
[TS]
01:12:27
◼
►
that she would chase after me after she
[TS]
01:12:31
◼
►
was in her underwear she would put up
[TS]
01:12:32
◼
►
put up a single finger as if to say no
[TS]
01:12:35
◼
►
no wait and should shout and she put on
[TS]
01:12:37
◼
►
a trench coat and come running after me
[TS]
01:12:39
◼
►
and then we would go any orange lights
[TS]
01:12:41
◼
►
it we who he would go get on a on a
[TS]
01:12:44
◼
►
steamship and we would go to America so
[TS]
01:12:47
◼
►
that was the first time but then the rid
[TS]
01:12:49
◼
►
the world of me to help her with the
[TS]
01:12:50
◼
►
heart of guilders could it could have
[TS]
01:12:53
◼
►
been in there and we were still using
[TS]
01:12:54
◼
►
guilders at the time but the other time
[TS]
01:12:57
◼
►
in the much worse time for the second
[TS]
01:12:59
◼
►
window love affair second window love
[TS]
01:13:01
◼
►
affair i was walking through one of the
[TS]
01:13:03
◼
►
kind of twisty narrow streets and the
[TS]
01:13:06
◼
►
red light district in damage him
[TS]
01:13:07
◼
►
and it was a crowded night it was late
[TS]
01:13:10
◼
►
at night and i think i had gone out of
[TS]
01:13:13
◼
►
my youth hostel to get some ice cream
[TS]
01:13:15
◼
►
which is harder to find in the red light
[TS]
01:13:19
◼
►
district in the middle of the night then
[TS]
01:13:20
◼
►
you might think if I was running a red
[TS]
01:13:23
◼
►
light district
[TS]
01:13:24
◼
►
I would have hookers sure i'll be like
[TS]
01:13:27
◼
►
in my top 23 ice cream parlors to write
[TS]
01:13:31
◼
►
and thereafter well just like if you're
[TS]
01:13:34
◼
►
if you're a guy and you're out roaming
[TS]
01:13:35
◼
►
the street with an insatiable desire
[TS]
01:13:37
◼
►
that you can't you can't win if you're
[TS]
01:13:40
◼
►
not ready yet
[TS]
01:13:41
◼
►
you want something that the treat but
[TS]
01:13:42
◼
►
you're not ready for the factory you
[TS]
01:13:44
◼
►
want a little treat you want to create a
[TS]
01:13:46
◼
►
little treat little time so I'm looking
[TS]
01:13:49
◼
►
for ice cream I can't find it
[TS]
01:13:51
◼
►
I'm going through this these narrow
[TS]
01:13:52
◼
►
winding streets and the streets are full
[TS]
01:13:54
◼
►
of men from all over the world creeps
[TS]
01:13:56
◼
►
from all over the world like you you're
[TS]
01:13:59
◼
►
walking through the streets that number
[TS]
01:14:00
◼
►
time I wanna clock in the morning and
[TS]
01:14:02
◼
►
every person that you see would be the
[TS]
01:14:04
◼
►
creepiest guy in the town where he grew
[TS]
01:14:07
◼
►
up right i mean they're just creeps them
[TS]
01:14:09
◼
►
all over and they're leering and there
[TS]
01:14:11
◼
►
they've got slobber at their they're bad
[TS]
01:14:16
◼
►
men they have stains on their pants
[TS]
01:14:18
◼
►
dander dander and it's on these narrow
[TS]
01:14:22
◼
►
streets
[TS]
01:14:22
◼
►
the girls are not of a flight up there
[TS]
01:14:26
◼
►
not looking down at you from their tall
[TS]
01:14:28
◼
►
windows they are in little cubbies right
[TS]
01:14:32
◼
►
at eye level right at street level and
[TS]
01:14:34
◼
►
the streets are very narrow there so you
[TS]
01:14:37
◼
►
don't you're not even really standing 10
[TS]
01:14:39
◼
►
feet back you're like looking at her
[TS]
01:14:41
◼
►
right through the glass shards did the
[TS]
01:14:42
◼
►
guys keep moving get out the way or do
[TS]
01:14:43
◼
►
they pause in front of window they pause
[TS]
01:14:45
◼
►
oh so it's like guys like when you got
[TS]
01:14:47
◼
►
to get the people try to get the samples
[TS]
01:14:49
◼
►
at costco yeah yeah and it's exactly
[TS]
01:14:51
◼
►
like that you're pushing your way
[TS]
01:14:52
◼
►
through a crowd and there are people
[TS]
01:14:54
◼
►
milling around these windows and the the
[TS]
01:14:56
◼
►
women are trying to the women are very
[TS]
01:14:58
◼
►
much in control as they're trying to
[TS]
01:15:00
◼
►
project that they're in control of the
[TS]
01:15:02
◼
►
situation and they keep the doors locked
[TS]
01:15:04
◼
►
right and in a lot of cases it's it's
[TS]
01:15:07
◼
►
not even a window
[TS]
01:15:08
◼
►
its just oh door with a window in it so
[TS]
01:15:12
◼
►
they're just standing in a glass doorway
[TS]
01:15:14
◼
►
and smells like the Kiwanis haunted
[TS]
01:15:18
◼
►
except nobody puts nobody put your hand
[TS]
01:15:21
◼
►
in a basket of spaghetti with confidence
[TS]
01:15:24
◼
►
and Gil despite that's right for 50
[TS]
01:15:26
◼
►
guilders you can come in put your hand
[TS]
01:15:27
◼
►
some calls began the side continued but
[TS]
01:15:29
◼
►
so so and you and you'll see guys will
[TS]
01:15:31
◼
►
walk up to these glass doors and they'll
[TS]
01:15:33
◼
►
knock on the glass and the world with a
[TS]
01:15:36
◼
►
woman will kind of look them up and down
[TS]
01:15:37
◼
►
and if they don't have too many stains
[TS]
01:15:39
◼
►
on their pants there's not too much
[TS]
01:15:40
◼
►
slobber on them they let them in and
[TS]
01:15:42
◼
►
then they close the curtain and they
[TS]
01:15:45
◼
►
kind of just do it right there
[TS]
01:15:47
◼
►
yeah anyway I'm walking through this
[TS]
01:15:50
◼
►
I'm looking for ice cream and I'm not
[TS]
01:15:53
◼
►
really looking side-to-side I'm not
[TS]
01:15:54
◼
►
looking I'm kind of looking at the
[TS]
01:15:56
◼
►
creepy guys and I'm looking at the girls
[TS]
01:15:58
◼
►
out of the corner of my eye as you do
[TS]
01:16:00
◼
►
sizemode but i'm not trying to i'm
[TS]
01:16:02
◼
►
certainly not shopping for a girl and
[TS]
01:16:04
◼
►
I'm just looking for ice cream really
[TS]
01:16:06
◼
►
just here because you're just walking a
[TS]
01:16:09
◼
►
there's nothing to talk about yeah i'm
[TS]
01:16:11
◼
►
in the red light district what are you
[TS]
01:16:12
◼
►
gonna do
[TS]
01:16:13
◼
►
yeah i'm walking through and it's just
[TS]
01:16:15
◼
►
one kind of girl in a red teddy after
[TS]
01:16:17
◼
►
another and i'm just like blah blah blah
[TS]
01:16:19
◼
►
girl in a red teddy and then I see this
[TS]
01:16:22
◼
►
girl out of the corner of my eye and she
[TS]
01:16:26
◼
►
platonic ideal I don't know what it is
[TS]
01:16:29
◼
►
about her except that it is everything
[TS]
01:16:32
◼
►
about her my platonic ideal and I look
[TS]
01:16:37
◼
►
at her out of the corner of my eye and
[TS]
01:16:39
◼
►
I'm surrounded by people by men who are
[TS]
01:16:42
◼
►
up a foot shorter than I am right so I'm
[TS]
01:16:46
◼
►
handle it and in the Netherlands men are
[TS]
01:16:48
◼
►
very tall but most of these men who are
[TS]
01:16:50
◼
►
here creeping around in this alley are
[TS]
01:16:51
◼
►
not from the Netherlands you get me they
[TS]
01:16:54
◼
►
don't know they're from the dancer lands
[TS]
01:16:55
◼
►
they are the creeps from there other
[TS]
01:16:57
◼
►
places and look at other corner very
[TS]
01:16:59
◼
►
much out of the corner of my eye and I'm
[TS]
01:17:01
◼
►
an expert at this
[TS]
01:17:02
◼
►
but she is looking right at me and I go
[TS]
01:17:08
◼
►
Who am I despite all your training did
[TS]
01:17:11
◼
►
you turn
[TS]
01:17:11
◼
►
despite all my training I blushed and
[TS]
01:17:16
◼
►
oh and so I i get to the end of this
[TS]
01:17:21
◼
►
alley and I'm like did I just run did
[TS]
01:17:23
◼
►
she look at me and I ran
[TS]
01:17:25
◼
►
what kind of a man am i and i said this
[TS]
01:17:30
◼
►
will not stand
[TS]
01:17:31
◼
►
I'm not gonna run out of this hooker
[TS]
01:17:33
◼
►
rally because this girl this platonic
[TS]
01:17:35
◼
►
ideal who's probably not even that
[TS]
01:17:37
◼
►
pretty looked at me caught me looking at
[TS]
01:17:40
◼
►
her I'm gonna go back and I'm gonna walk
[TS]
01:17:43
◼
►
through the alley with my head held high
[TS]
01:17:45
◼
►
and I'm gonna see her and I'm gonna nod
[TS]
01:17:47
◼
►
my head like a gentleman and so I turned
[TS]
01:17:52
◼
►
back around and I walked back through
[TS]
01:17:53
◼
►
the alley and when i get within eyesight
[TS]
01:17:56
◼
►
of her little doorway
[TS]
01:17:57
◼
►
she's looking at me already she's
[TS]
01:17:59
◼
►
looking for me and I see her and she
[TS]
01:18:03
◼
►
gives me a look very knowing look
[TS]
01:18:07
◼
►
and my eye I can't breathe all of a
[TS]
01:18:12
◼
►
sudden I'm choking on my own
[TS]
01:18:14
◼
►
Adam's apple and I try and give what i
[TS]
01:18:18
◼
►
think is like a gentlemanly nod but what
[TS]
01:18:23
◼
►
is really just a some kind of likes
[TS]
01:18:25
◼
►
passes spastic had emotion he twitched
[TS]
01:18:30
◼
►
and then I literally run away
[TS]
01:18:35
◼
►
and so now I'm walking through the red
[TS]
01:18:37
◼
►
light district and I'm covered in sweat
[TS]
01:18:39
◼
►
and I'm thinking she's the most
[TS]
01:18:42
◼
►
beautiful girl I've ever seen in my life
[TS]
01:18:44
◼
►
what and here's the problem with being a
[TS]
01:18:47
◼
►
romantic is that it being a romantic is
[TS]
01:18:50
◼
►
nothing causes nothing but pain in one's
[TS]
01:18:53
◼
►
life and now I have seen the most
[TS]
01:18:55
◼
►
beautiful girl in the world and she is a
[TS]
01:18:57
◼
►
uh she's standing in a doorway in a red
[TS]
01:19:00
◼
►
light district and what am I supposed to
[TS]
01:19:03
◼
►
do now I'm not Richard Gere i'm not
[TS]
01:19:05
◼
►
going to make her an honest woman she's
[TS]
01:19:08
◼
►
probably from Belarus and so I'm
[TS]
01:19:13
◼
►
thinking to myself I should spend 50
[TS]
01:19:16
◼
►
guilders just to be next to this girl
[TS]
01:19:20
◼
►
and I don't have to prove yourself that
[TS]
01:19:22
◼
►
you could do it right
[TS]
01:19:23
◼
►
well that is the question could i do
[TS]
01:19:26
◼
►
this and the answer was that i didn't
[TS]
01:19:29
◼
►
think i could and so I walk around the
[TS]
01:19:32
◼
►
block and then you know go i'm still
[TS]
01:19:34
◼
►
kind of looking for ice cream out of the
[TS]
01:19:36
◼
►
corner and more than 4 i'm hoping if I
[TS]
01:19:40
◼
►
just find ice cream i can just go back
[TS]
01:19:41
◼
►
to the youth hostel and try to block
[TS]
01:19:43
◼
►
this out of my mind but I can't get her
[TS]
01:19:46
◼
►
I can't get her face out of my mind I'm
[TS]
01:19:49
◼
►
walking around and increasingly I'm not
[TS]
01:19:51
◼
►
looking for ice cream and increasing
[TS]
01:19:52
◼
►
them being drawn back to this alley and
[TS]
01:19:57
◼
►
I I so now i'm at the entrance to the
[TS]
01:19:59
◼
►
alley and I'm looking down the alley and
[TS]
01:20:01
◼
►
I look at her door which I can kind of
[TS]
01:20:03
◼
►
see the light coming out of and I kind
[TS]
01:20:06
◼
►
of tiptoe into this alley again the
[TS]
01:20:07
◼
►
alley has 500 guys in it
[TS]
01:20:09
◼
►
tiptoe into the alley and as soon as I
[TS]
01:20:11
◼
►
be I come in sight of her door she sees
[TS]
01:20:14
◼
►
me as though she's looking for me and
[TS]
01:20:18
◼
►
when she sees that I'm looking for her
[TS]
01:20:19
◼
►
she gets a very knowing look on her face
[TS]
01:20:22
◼
►
and she's been she's been unpredictable
[TS]
01:20:24
◼
►
and perfectly calm
[TS]
01:20:25
◼
►
she's not putting on a show for the
[TS]
01:20:28
◼
►
other men in the alley every time I
[TS]
01:20:29
◼
►
walked past this door the other men are
[TS]
01:20:32
◼
►
invisible to her and all she was looking
[TS]
01:20:34
◼
►
at is me she looks at me and she makes a
[TS]
01:20:36
◼
►
very subtle gesture that just says hey
[TS]
01:20:39
◼
►
here and
[TS]
01:20:45
◼
►
it is a hey come here that says to me
[TS]
01:20:47
◼
►
you are Richard Gere you are my Richard
[TS]
01:20:50
◼
►
Gere come here
[TS]
01:20:54
◼
►
you and I both know it is inevitable and
[TS]
01:20:57
◼
►
I lost it I absolutely lost it and Iran
[TS]
01:21:03
◼
►
I ram Iran again I ran and I have never
[TS]
01:21:11
◼
►
stopped thinking about this girl I'm
[TS]
01:21:13
◼
►
icon how long ago was this 20 years ago
[TS]
01:21:21
◼
►
God who knows where she is now she's
[TS]
01:21:26
◼
►
probably working in a in a travel agency
[TS]
01:21:28
◼
►
in Belarus yeah you got forest gump I'm
[TS]
01:21:33
◼
►
not like Forrest Gump run and you're
[TS]
01:21:35
◼
►
running you run part i'm not like
[TS]
01:21:37
◼
►
Forrest Gump life is not a box of
[TS]
01:21:40
◼
►
chocolate how do you resolve that Johnny
[TS]
01:21:42
◼
►
the box from saying save it how do you
[TS]
01:21:44
◼
►
know how do you resolve this John you've
[TS]
01:21:46
◼
►
brought up a lot of tumult how do you
[TS]
01:21:48
◼
►
resolve that you're living with that
[TS]
01:21:49
◼
►
they're literally every day now I don't
[TS]
01:21:51
◼
►
think you can resolve it so what do you
[TS]
01:21:53
◼
►
do with that I mean that's got to be on
[TS]
01:21:54
◼
►
your mind
[TS]
01:21:56
◼
►
it was on my mind hmm well but the
[TS]
01:21:59
◼
►
lesson is don't fall in love with
[TS]
01:22:00
◼
►
prostitutes I fell and I fell in love
[TS]
01:22:02
◼
►
with a woman I saw for 30 seconds and a
[TS]
01:22:04
◼
►
little general once i stop thinking
[TS]
01:22:05
◼
►
about it is 1986 I stopped thinking
[TS]
01:22:07
◼
►
about it was that like a is I'd like
[TS]
01:22:09
◼
►
Piggly Wiggly no no no it's a cat
[TS]
01:22:12
◼
►
it's like a an adorable 7-eleven a like
[TS]
01:22:16
◼
►
a like a common go whoo
[TS]
01:22:18
◼
►
not in my case if they're up in the
[TS]
01:22:21
◼
►
other than the Midwest number like a
[TS]
01:22:23
◼
►
like a Wisconsin land they have these
[TS]
01:22:26
◼
►
little welcoming stores called come and
[TS]
01:22:29
◼
►
go as a terrible idea and they spell
[TS]
01:22:31
◼
►
come k um common go th that's another
[TS]
01:22:36
◼
►
that's an awful that's an awful awful
[TS]
01:22:38
◼
►
it's a terrible name and they sell
[TS]
01:22:41
◼
►
cheese curds sure you're going to keep
[TS]
01:22:44
◼
►
me from visiting the pump chilly but
[TS]
01:22:45
◼
►
anyway these places are called the
[TS]
01:22:47
◼
►
general it's some kind of Dixie painful
[TS]
01:22:50
◼
►
and now it's called a little general
[TS]
01:22:51
◼
►
little generally later became our got
[TS]
01:22:53
◼
►
bought out by the circle case you know
[TS]
01:22:54
◼
►
little general is my nickname for my
[TS]
01:22:56
◼
►
your little Dutchman my for my little
[TS]
01:23:00
◼
►
metal toy soldier boots little jumpsuit
[TS]
01:23:03
◼
►
anyway so you see a girl for 30 seconds
[TS]
01:23:05
◼
►
to talk about it's too painful it's a
[TS]
01:23:07
◼
►
whole I shared my story I saw us are
[TS]
01:23:10
◼
►
like going in and I think she bought a
[TS]
01:23:12
◼
►
pack of cigarettes and some paper towels
[TS]
01:23:13
◼
►
and I just couldn't get out of my mind
[TS]
01:23:15
◼
►
to like two years ago smoke joshi smoked
[TS]
01:23:19
◼
►
she's probably smoking right now
[TS]
01:23:21
◼
►
wiping up some skin handcuffs hanging
[TS]
01:23:22
◼
►
from rearview mirror
[TS]
01:23:24
◼
►
oh my god my roommate in college had
[TS]
01:23:26
◼
►
that boy
[TS]
01:23:27
◼
►
well yeah mm-hmm
[TS]
01:23:33
◼
►
[Music]
[TS]