Ep. 81: "It Tastes Like the Forest"
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11 your girls are they on the pill don't
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ever say that word again
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[Music]
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hello agent
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hi Merlin has got good me too
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my my my breath is bad because of the
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because of the Atkins diet the change
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and so tacky tacky tacky to it because
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it's reflecting back off of my
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microphone
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haha no i'm talking into the microphone
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and then my breath is shooting back at
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me and it's not your typical like bad
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breath of someone who doesn't brush his
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it's this other worldly bad breath
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I shouldn't ask but can you give me two
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there is a sourness or a international
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know it tastes it still tastes like the
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forest tastes like juniper and regret it
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tastes like if you took a spade and dug
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into the dirt of a forest floor not too
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it's a little soil early moments it's a
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little low me
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yeah it does it taste like it tastes
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like I've been eating racoon high and
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you didn't like the record you're not
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going to eat it I'm not gonna need a
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raccoon unless I absolutely have to but
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you you know this is the thing about
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grass-fed beef that a lot of people
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don't realize i make I'm transitioning
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now to all I'm going on the Portlandia
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diet I'm transitioning a over to only
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eating animals whose name I know that's
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so wise and the thing about animals that
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eat grass and natural foods and not you
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know corn and and other animals ground
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into corn AKA poison the thing about
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those animals is that they taste very
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gamey they taste like moose they taste
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I started to wonder if I just got a bad
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load but I got some grass fed beef one
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time and
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it tasted like salmon to me right right
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it tasted wrong wrong off ya off but it
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isn't off that is the taste of cow that
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has been heating dandelions which is
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what they want
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huh and so I'm having to recalibrate my
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whole taste scenario because I'm like me
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beef up now i'm going to eat this
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healthy beef and it's like yes healthy
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beef tastes like a moroccan leather
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factory smells know if you've ever
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smelled a moroccan leather factory by
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the cologne but but it will put you off
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it will put you off your your food for a
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long time so it doesn't smell like
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Alexis it smells like cow
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it smells like it smells like cow that
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has been stripped with a bone tool and
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then like hung covered in flies outside
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of a Moroccan butcher shop we read that
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off a whole foods thing aren't you in
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the hot Sun this is what they're
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aspiring this me to taste like I have a
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metric in life it's a metric I lived up
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to every day but it's a you can call it
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laziness if you like but i think one
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good metric in life is like success can
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be money success can be famous success
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can be i think success as you get older
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is reducing the amount of complexity in
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your life so think about being young and
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like having have a whole bunch of jobs
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you don't like me can almost no money
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like one nice bit of getting a little
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older is you reduce the complexity of
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having one job that lets you pay your
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bills like that's you know it may sound
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kind of simplistic but the problem is
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like everything I look at obviously
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getting off meth is good because it
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reduces the complexity if you're
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traveling it can be hard to find good
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math racers it's true but like I said
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we're traveling but yes let's see that
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some people as they get older they go oh
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like it's not enough for me to have the
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ABC well brand of scotch
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now I've got to have the glenlivet
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excellent fish which is great and the
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tasty but then pretty soon you can't
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have a well brand anything again you
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become beer guy and I'm worried that if
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I improve my health
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and I mean I don't need as much junk
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food as i used because it doesn't make
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me feel bad to eat a lot of junk food as
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you're learning i guess but um but I
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worry that like if I get on that whole
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grass-fed thing i'm going to be paying
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like forty dollars a pound for something
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that tastes like Morocco yeah and then
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eventually get used to that you know
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what I mean yeah you had anything like
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your music club McLuhan your fear me
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I imagine I imagine for you maybe this
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is something like with your ears like
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you like you're very sensitive to sound
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but you'd like you know you you can't
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listen to bad sounding music you if you
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would probably not want to listen like a
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low quality mp3 for example right says
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it's similar because I mean like I don't
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mind that like I'm fine to rip it 320 or
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loss now and I do actually hear the
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difference even though I'm death which
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means that the hand side away from have
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to go to whole foods to get a burger you
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just hold up your phone on the on the
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muni just just click the volume button
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all the way up and like check it out
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blurred lines to do product if I hear
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that goddamn Macklemore song one more
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time he said nobody says and that's what
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I'm gonna most talented he notices a
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long series is he was his mom reminds
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him that he was into girls since before
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pre k I know now I was into girls before
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pre before pre pretty for before pre k I
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feel bad about macklemore because I the
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hometown boys right at your home team
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oh yeah and I like him personally I
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think he's a very nice guy and he is a
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super cool guy and and it's the classic
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thing seattle thing as he's coming up
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everybody's like oh my god local guide
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check him out he's like making it he's
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so cool and then as soon as he gets
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popular than all the hipsters are hating
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him and so I go to his video shoot the
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other day and i'm at the video shoot
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I like Macklemore I like him as a person
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I'm there to support him and I am doing
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my thing which is standing in a crowd
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full of young people and I am commenting
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on their territorial disappearance and
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their behavior and I'm like look at
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these young people they are almost human
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uh not quite but but
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are edging toward it and i'm reporting
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some of the things that that they are
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you know that they're saying in the
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crowd and I'm I'm just you know I'm
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having my usual light-hearted fun at
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other peoples expense these young people
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are dumb that this is a completely
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anonymous thing that I'm not you know
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it's not like i'm naming them except
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naming them in the general like young
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people are you doing this on the
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internet was doing it on the internet
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brother and then out of nowhere a
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booking agent from a local club a friend
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of mine a guy who is now in his
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mid-thirties and I think has always
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identified himself as a young person and
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now he's going through a little bit of
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an identity crisis he is he is realizing
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he's no longer young person but it
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doesn't know he's not an old person yet
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either he's 35 or something he's
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somewhere in this middle ground he
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doesn't clean at the reeds and he he
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sends a tweet at me where he says oh
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well at least you went to a thing that
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you hate to talk about it on the
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internet he said he said send me some
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systems you know kind of shitty tweet
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that was like that was trying to call me
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out for a for like being at this event
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and hating in quotes hating I was your
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being a player hate I was hatin hatin on
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the player and why did I go to the event
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if I was just there to hate was the
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implication of his kind of snarky tweet
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and I wrote back and I was like what the
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fuck are you talking about like first of
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all all any of us do all any of us have
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ever done is go to shows and snark like
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what the fuck if you want to take that
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from me you are depriving me of
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eighty-five percent of my culture and
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life stand in the back of the room of a
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band that you adore we're your friends
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with everybody in the band and in the
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show and what is there to do except
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snark about what people are wearing and
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what dummies they are like this is
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fundamental to my to my culture so i
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write back and I'm like what's your
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problem like get off my butt and he
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keeps he keeps at it like you know like
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won't get off of this idea and and and
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it felt very foreign felt very like it
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felt very like what the fuck is behind
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you know what i mean and i we took it
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offline we were texting back and forth
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he wouldn't he wouldn't get off he kinda
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wouldn't get off this like righteous
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stance and it turned into a small very
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small but public feud between me and
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this guy we're of course other people in
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the town who is because Seattle is small
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and everybody's got a fucking opinion
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all these people get involved in any way
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the long and the short of it is the
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other day I go to macklemore's twitter
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page and Macklemore isn't following me
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anymore he used to follow me and now
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Macklemore unfollowed me again I
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Macklemore I can only guess that i
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unfollowed me because of something
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because I because i was being accused of
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being a hater at his video shoot and now
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now side there are some quadrants of
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seattle in which i am I Macklemore hater
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which I'm absolutely not
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wow that's acrobatic you know what I
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mean I'm a lover but now I'm in the
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position of you can you know you can't
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prove a negative i can't go out in the
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world and say hey Macklemore lover here
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coming through because it's just gonna
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be like see he's just hate more
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so anyway maybe he's just taking a break
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he's a busy guy
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yes true he's got he's he's you know
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he's he's got a lot going on but still I
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feel like very confusing sometimes when
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somebody and follows you it's fairly
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conspicuous he didn't make a point of it
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but it's like we should let me tweak
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tweak your apps
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yeah i'm going to just affect some very
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small changes would be nice but I tried
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all the numbers back to your earlier
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point yet grass there was a time there
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was a time where i did not have any keys
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the the guy this is when you were in
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living in the van when he was living in
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the yeah like what you have
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narrator something when I i was i was
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living in a ford aerostar in a carport
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and the Aerostar was plugged in by an
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extension cord to a battery charger to
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the house so that i could open the the
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back deck the lid of the trunk lid and
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that would cause the light to go on and
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I could read Stephen King novels
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well I was trying to sleep it's tricky
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was trying to sleep in this arrow star
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and at a certain point the owner of the
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house that was featuring the Aerostar
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said as your friend you've been living
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in my minivan my non-running minivan for
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◼
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too long i'm gonna have to ask you for
[TS]
00:11:52
◼
►
my keys to my minivan but you know like
[TS]
00:11:56
◼
►
my house keys basically and then I
[TS]
00:11:59
◼
►
entered that realm where I had no keys
[TS]
00:12:02
◼
►
and i remember when i when i rejoined
[TS]
00:12:08
◼
►
the world I quit doing drugs I got a job
[TS]
00:12:13
◼
►
and i got my first set of keys i got i
[TS]
00:12:18
◼
►
got my own apartment again you know
[TS]
00:12:20
◼
►
after sort of a long period of no place
[TS]
00:12:23
◼
►
i got my own place and I got some keys
[TS]
00:12:26
◼
►
and then I got I got a job and they gave
[TS]
00:12:28
◼
►
me keys to my work and then I had keys
[TS]
00:12:31
◼
►
on this ring and i was like i am that
[TS]
00:12:34
◼
►
that was the point at which i was adding
[TS]
00:12:36
◼
►
stuff to my life and every new key i got
[TS]
00:12:40
◼
►
made me feel like more apart
[TS]
00:12:43
◼
►
uh-huh every I mean I totally agree and
[TS]
00:12:46
◼
►
to me like every key is a new obligation
[TS]
00:12:50
◼
►
a new debt when can you start it
[TS]
00:12:52
◼
►
take care of its nothin up there was a
[TS]
00:12:54
◼
►
lot of responsibility can be good like
[TS]
00:12:56
◼
►
if you want to be the captain of
[TS]
00:12:57
◼
►
industry in your case eventually with
[TS]
00:12:59
◼
►
you managed a you manage the bar you use
[TS]
00:13:02
◼
►
like a manager at a bar right yeah i did
[TS]
00:13:04
◼
►
the books and stuff and and eventually I
[TS]
00:13:06
◼
►
he's John I was one of those guys those
[TS]
00:13:08
◼
►
mid-nineties guys where I had a big
[TS]
00:13:10
◼
►
chain and it had 35 keys on it and I was
[TS]
00:13:15
◼
►
like what happened to me a few years ago
[TS]
00:13:17
◼
►
I had zero keys then I had like four
[TS]
00:13:20
◼
►
keys i felt good
[TS]
00:13:21
◼
►
great now I have 40 keys i feel like
[TS]
00:13:24
◼
►
shit isn't that weird and as you were
[TS]
00:13:27
◼
►
saying at that right now Merlin you know
[TS]
00:13:30
◼
►
what I did today I'm going through my
[TS]
00:13:31
◼
►
closets
[TS]
00:13:32
◼
►
I have too many tuxedos self-awareness
[TS]
00:13:39
◼
►
John not so many levels
[TS]
00:13:41
◼
►
I'm going through I'm going through my
[TS]
00:13:42
◼
►
closet I'm like wait a minute i have i
[TS]
00:13:45
◼
►
have multiple tuxedos and that is that's
[TS]
00:13:49
◼
►
crazy i have you were the only 1i think
[TS]
00:13:51
◼
►
you're the only one who didn't bitch
[TS]
00:13:52
◼
►
about having to then rent a brown tuxedo
[TS]
00:13:54
◼
►
you're at you will be a tuxedo man how
[TS]
00:13:57
◼
►
many you got how many it roughly right
[TS]
00:13:59
◼
►
being you know count you more than to
[TS]
00:14:01
◼
►
get more than to have more than two
[TS]
00:14:02
◼
►
tuxedos
[TS]
00:14:03
◼
►
I have a I have a I have a midnight blue
[TS]
00:14:05
◼
►
tuxedo I have a I have a you know your
[TS]
00:14:08
◼
►
standard black tuxedo then I have a
[TS]
00:14:10
◼
►
comedy black tuxedo just to say it's
[TS]
00:14:15
◼
►
good it's tubing to go to the flowers
[TS]
00:14:17
◼
►
say they currently so you can squirt
[TS]
00:14:18
◼
►
people with your flower girl but it's
[TS]
00:14:20
◼
►
like a tuxedo the Charles Nelson Reilly
[TS]
00:14:21
◼
►
on and uh you know celebrity match game
[TS]
00:14:27
◼
►
or something like its experience of life
[TS]
00:14:28
◼
►
match game after talk
[TS]
00:14:30
◼
►
it's a laugh tuxedo because it's got big
[TS]
00:14:32
◼
►
wide lapels and but it's a it was at in
[TS]
00:14:35
◼
►
its day it was a beautiful tuxedo still
[TS]
00:14:37
◼
►
is a nice tuxedo it's just stated she
[TS]
00:14:39
◼
►
was nineteen seventy-two yeah it's just
[TS]
00:14:41
◼
►
unfashionably cut okay and then I have a
[TS]
00:14:44
◼
►
couple of white dinner jacket says one
[TS]
00:14:46
◼
►
goes with some with some uh you know
[TS]
00:14:48
◼
►
matching black the tuxedo pants and all
[TS]
00:14:53
◼
►
that wouldn't be such a handsome look on
[TS]
00:14:55
◼
►
it's very nice that I have that boy if
[TS]
00:14:57
◼
►
you can go with you know what I'm
[TS]
00:14:59
◼
►
starting on the interactive what's a
[TS]
00:15:00
◼
►
white so so black identity called a
[TS]
00:15:02
◼
►
dinner jacket like if you wear like a
[TS]
00:15:04
◼
►
tuxedo at night you where you are the
[TS]
00:15:06
◼
►
black you know where the tails unless
[TS]
00:15:07
◼
►
you're fucking jiminy cricket but I
[TS]
00:15:09
◼
►
don't know why everyone again afternoon
[TS]
00:15:11
◼
►
or evening when you wear a white tuxedo
[TS]
00:15:13
◼
►
well there's some contention among the
[TS]
00:15:16
◼
►
the male fashion people about the
[TS]
00:15:19
◼
►
appropriateness of a white dinner jacket
[TS]
00:15:20
◼
►
some people say that it is only for the
[TS]
00:15:23
◼
►
tropics
[TS]
00:15:25
◼
►
so we're gonna let James Bond kind of
[TS]
00:15:27
◼
►
exactly you're wearing the white dinner
[TS]
00:15:28
◼
►
jacket if you are at a casino in Bimini
[TS]
00:15:32
◼
►
or in a curse al at Seattle is not in
[TS]
00:15:38
◼
►
the tropics and so one could argue and I
[TS]
00:15:41
◼
►
think people do argue that there's no
[TS]
00:15:42
◼
►
time at which it's appropriate to wear
[TS]
00:15:44
◼
►
white dinner jacket in seattle not even
[TS]
00:15:47
◼
►
if you were in the Navy but you know as
[TS]
00:15:51
◼
►
part of my job i'm often on cruise ships
[TS]
00:15:53
◼
►
now and cruise ships gobo go into the
[TS]
00:15:58
◼
►
tropics and so I feel like clinically
[TS]
00:15:59
◼
►
you're not there as a mixologist there
[TS]
00:16:02
◼
►
there's an entertainer and volleyball
[TS]
00:16:06
◼
►
yeah i mean the joco Cruz was the first
[TS]
00:16:08
◼
►
of these cruises that Jonathan Coulton
[TS]
00:16:10
◼
►
crews and now I'm going on another
[TS]
00:16:11
◼
►
cruise this fall that the the jesse
[TS]
00:16:13
◼
►
thorn is the maximum fun group so
[TS]
00:16:16
◼
►
cruising now is a part of my lifestyle
[TS]
00:16:18
◼
►
and now i have other and i already had a
[TS]
00:16:21
◼
►
white dinner jacket and now i have a
[TS]
00:16:23
◼
►
second white energy and I'm so anyway
[TS]
00:16:26
◼
►
like at exactly as you're saying i have
[TS]
00:16:29
◼
►
gone from living in a minivan to having
[TS]
00:16:32
◼
►
too many tuxedos and I'm afraid that i
[TS]
00:16:36
◼
►
am afraid that if I don't do something
[TS]
00:16:38
◼
►
if I don't arrest this trajectory I'm
[TS]
00:16:42
◼
►
going to be I'm going to drown in
[TS]
00:16:44
◼
►
tuxedos
[TS]
00:16:46
◼
►
that's the last thing you'll see is my
[TS]
00:16:48
◼
►
hand sticking up out of a pile of
[TS]
00:16:51
◼
►
ever-growing tuxedos and then I'll
[TS]
00:16:52
◼
►
because it's just a small notice in the
[TS]
00:16:55
◼
►
local paper look at local musician found
[TS]
00:16:57
◼
►
dead under a pile of ironic c/o holding
[TS]
00:17:03
◼
►
as I go down holding a bottle of 12 year
[TS]
00:17:05
◼
►
old single malt scotch that you like
[TS]
00:17:07
◼
►
anything to drink
[TS]
00:17:08
◼
►
leave it yeah I don't want to sound like
[TS]
00:17:12
◼
►
too much of it
[TS]
00:17:13
◼
►
hipster faker if I were wealthy man i
[TS]
00:17:16
◼
►
might have a different feeling about
[TS]
00:17:17
◼
►
this but you know my my keyring you see
[TS]
00:17:20
◼
►
my keyring yeah I have two keys
[TS]
00:17:22
◼
►
yeah the key to my house whenever key to
[TS]
00:17:24
◼
►
my office smart yeah and and a you know
[TS]
00:17:28
◼
►
if I need the car key i grab the car key
[TS]
00:17:29
◼
►
but I don't carry that around it's like
[TS]
00:17:32
◼
►
it puts holes in your pockets tool and
[TS]
00:17:34
◼
►
you see these people walking around now
[TS]
00:17:35
◼
►
you probably have like you look at you
[TS]
00:17:38
◼
►
21 modern car have you seen modern car
[TS]
00:17:40
◼
►
keys I mean they're the size of like a
[TS]
00:17:42
◼
►
like a like a box of like fireplace
[TS]
00:17:45
◼
►
matches sure I breakfast
[TS]
00:17:47
◼
►
yeah I've rented one and and
[TS]
00:17:48
◼
►
increasingly now you just put the key in
[TS]
00:17:51
◼
►
the proximity of the car and and the car
[TS]
00:17:54
◼
►
just knows it to you because I'm musk I
[TS]
00:17:57
◼
►
in fact that i have to do is get
[TS]
00:17:58
◼
►
somewhere near it just feels you on
[TS]
00:18:00
◼
►
moscow city
[TS]
00:18:02
◼
►
he he put you put biometrics in it
[TS]
00:18:05
◼
►
that's right that's right that was that
[TS]
00:18:06
◼
►
was his addition I don't know I i could
[TS]
00:18:09
◼
►
have more i can get more stuff but you
[TS]
00:18:10
◼
►
know I it sounds like such a stupid like
[TS]
00:18:13
◼
►
punk rock thing to say but like you know
[TS]
00:18:15
◼
►
whenever I i think we said this before
[TS]
00:18:17
◼
►
but like I feel like when I see somebody
[TS]
00:18:19
◼
►
who not only has a lot of keys but like
[TS]
00:18:21
◼
►
has a lot of keys that they want
[TS]
00:18:23
◼
►
everybody to see like I just see like a
[TS]
00:18:26
◼
►
security guard
[TS]
00:18:27
◼
►
yeah icic somebody who's like gotta get
[TS]
00:18:30
◼
►
I mean I that sounds silly but I mean
[TS]
00:18:32
◼
►
like I wonder how many of those keys
[TS]
00:18:33
◼
►
actually go to anything do you really
[TS]
00:18:35
◼
►
need all of them all the time
[TS]
00:18:36
◼
►
yes trying to beach there trying to be
[TS]
00:18:38
◼
►
Schneider from one day at a time
[TS]
00:18:40
◼
►
oh now that was a good look wasn't he
[TS]
00:18:42
◼
►
was using a cosplay Snyder you know he
[TS]
00:18:46
◼
►
was a slim guy but increasingly why is
[TS]
00:18:49
◼
►
that girl today that was off digging it
[TS]
00:18:51
◼
►
was a great effect
[TS]
00:18:52
◼
►
oh i know i like is often girl off to
[TS]
00:18:55
◼
►
the soft black yeah i see but here's the
[TS]
00:19:01
◼
►
thing this is this is where it all ties
[TS]
00:19:02
◼
►
together though is we should get back to
[TS]
00:19:04
◼
►
the tuxedos probably but it was all of
[TS]
00:19:06
◼
►
those things I think you have to ask
[TS]
00:19:07
◼
►
yourself something I say to my kids
[TS]
00:19:08
◼
►
sometimes when you're thinking about you
[TS]
00:19:10
◼
►
Jason Kidd Michael my kids when you're
[TS]
00:19:13
◼
►
thinking about your work you know you
[TS]
00:19:15
◼
►
get to those crossroads with your work
[TS]
00:19:17
◼
►
with your life and i think one
[TS]
00:19:18
◼
►
rhetorical question to quietly ask your
[TS]
00:19:21
◼
►
mind is what I want ten times more of
[TS]
00:19:24
◼
►
like if you if you're being treated a
[TS]
00:19:26
◼
►
certain way by an employer imagine
[TS]
00:19:29
◼
►
yourself staying there for wildwood you
[TS]
00:19:30
◼
►
want ten times more of that was like 10
[TS]
00:19:32
◼
►
times more of work later you know your
[TS]
00:19:34
◼
►
own multiplier but you know I I think
[TS]
00:19:37
◼
►
like okay do I want what complexity do i
[TS]
00:19:41
◼
►
want to add like you know like I just
[TS]
00:19:43
◼
►
listened to an interview out bob was
[TS]
00:19:45
◼
►
interviewing this guy from PETA and
[TS]
00:19:47
◼
►
talking about like he brought up this
[TS]
00:19:48
◼
►
very basic things like when you travel
[TS]
00:19:50
◼
►
you gotta get your wheat bread you gotta
[TS]
00:19:51
◼
►
get your avocado
[TS]
00:19:52
◼
►
guys like it's not really all that hard
[TS]
00:19:53
◼
►
and I'm like well maybe travel as much
[TS]
00:19:55
◼
►
as i do like it's hard you know III it's
[TS]
00:19:58
◼
►
hard enough not to get something that
[TS]
00:20:00
◼
►
didn't fall out of a machine
[TS]
00:20:02
◼
►
mhm you know what i mean and i guess i
[TS]
00:20:04
◼
►
just think about like what what I want
[TS]
00:20:06
◼
►
to make a key coming back to math John
[TS]
00:20:08
◼
►
yes you do it seems like one of the hard
[TS]
00:20:11
◼
►
parts about being addicted to drugs and
[TS]
00:20:13
◼
►
generally if you're addicted to
[TS]
00:20:14
◼
►
cigarettes like worst-case scenario that
[TS]
00:20:17
◼
►
you can buy cigarettes a lot of places
[TS]
00:20:19
◼
►
yes you just talk a whole lot of places
[TS]
00:20:21
◼
►
like if the trend a you might be out of
[TS]
00:20:23
◼
►
luck but like you know if you've got a
[TS]
00:20:25
◼
►
score heroin like that's you're gonna
[TS]
00:20:27
◼
►
have to trust some people and it might
[TS]
00:20:29
◼
►
take a few minutes
[TS]
00:20:30
◼
►
yeah that that's true but but also if
[TS]
00:20:35
◼
►
you are if you are in the heroine buying
[TS]
00:20:38
◼
►
subculture you are you know what like it
[TS]
00:20:43
◼
►
seems to us that it is easy to get
[TS]
00:20:46
◼
►
cigarettes because because we're living
[TS]
00:20:49
◼
►
in the in the in the culture of where
[TS]
00:20:53
◼
►
we're living in a culture where however
[TS]
00:20:54
◼
►
much eight dollars for a pack of
[TS]
00:20:56
◼
►
cigarettes is not too much and we are
[TS]
00:21:00
◼
►
welcome in stores but there are people
[TS]
00:21:02
◼
►
you know a surprising number of people
[TS]
00:21:05
◼
►
for whom getting a pack of cigarettes is
[TS]
00:21:08
◼
►
a challenge and if you are living in a
[TS]
00:21:11
◼
►
heroine world you would be surprised you
[TS]
00:21:16
◼
►
that you could travel from town to town
[TS]
00:21:18
◼
►
and you're right you're you still are
[TS]
00:21:21
◼
►
going to have to like put in some
[TS]
00:21:23
◼
►
legwork but if you plan ahead you can
[TS]
00:21:25
◼
►
make some calls
[TS]
00:21:26
◼
►
ok whereas with cigarettes you might
[TS]
00:21:28
◼
►
just be out of luck I'm just saying like
[TS]
00:21:29
◼
►
the more stuff that you think about this
[TS]
00:21:31
◼
►
like I think everybody can ask
[TS]
00:21:33
◼
►
themselves like what are they worried
[TS]
00:21:35
◼
►
they won't be able to do or get once the
[TS]
00:21:38
◼
►
wheels hit the ground right and that
[TS]
00:21:41
◼
►
could be a drink that could be weed that
[TS]
00:21:44
◼
►
could be a handjob
[TS]
00:21:45
◼
►
I'm afraid that people live in a and you
[TS]
00:21:48
◼
►
know this is a like this is the thing
[TS]
00:21:50
◼
►
that I started to worry about a little
[TS]
00:21:51
◼
►
bit the the
[TS]
00:21:52
◼
►
that that I think in terms of other
[TS]
00:21:55
◼
►
people too much
[TS]
00:21:58
◼
►
not that I'm thinking about other people
[TS]
00:22:00
◼
►
but that I think in terms of other
[TS]
00:22:02
◼
►
people like you are
[TS]
00:22:04
◼
►
it sounds like based on some previous
[TS]
00:22:05
◼
►
conversations you do a you're doing a
[TS]
00:22:08
◼
►
little bit more sort of pre-filtering
[TS]
00:22:10
◼
►
like he seems like he's more stuff where
[TS]
00:22:12
◼
►
you kind of like filter it through a
[TS]
00:22:14
◼
►
notional point of view
[TS]
00:22:16
◼
►
yeah right and and and and so I feel
[TS]
00:22:19
◼
►
tradition i feel typically that other
[TS]
00:22:22
◼
►
people more or less cannot live without
[TS]
00:22:26
◼
►
their crutches and their crutches are
[TS]
00:22:29
◼
►
ridiculous or or the that there are a
[TS]
00:22:33
◼
►
lot of their crutches that people like
[TS]
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going to full-on like like clawing the
[TS]
00:22:39
◼
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earth panic mode because they can't get
[TS]
00:22:42
◼
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I mean you know you you
[TS]
00:22:43
◼
►
we've all been through it yeah i've been
[TS]
00:22:45
◼
►
i've been traveling with people where
[TS]
00:22:47
◼
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they didn't have their they they forgot
[TS]
00:22:49
◼
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their pillow you know they brought their
[TS]
00:22:50
◼
►
pillow with them on the trip skills a
[TS]
00:22:52
◼
►
kid with their stuffy
[TS]
00:22:54
◼
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yeah that's why we're almost done if you
[TS]
00:22:56
◼
►
left that on the plane like it's it's
[TS]
00:22:57
◼
►
game over
[TS]
00:22:58
◼
►
it's game over and that but we're
[TS]
00:22:59
◼
►
talking about a thirty-year-old
[TS]
00:23:00
◼
►
personality menthol cigarettes let alone
[TS]
00:23:02
◼
►
menthol cigarettes right or let alone
[TS]
00:23:05
◼
►
you know food and drink people get
[TS]
00:23:07
◼
►
attached two pillows it's true but I'm
[TS]
00:23:09
◼
►
stop but I'm trying to stop thinking in
[TS]
00:23:11
◼
►
terms of other people in that way or
[TS]
00:23:14
◼
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like as a as a you know as a a prism to
[TS]
00:23:22
◼
►
try and like break out all the different
[TS]
00:23:25
◼
►
colors of my own thought and and just
[TS]
00:23:28
◼
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start kind of trying to try to stay more
[TS]
00:23:31
◼
►
stable more focused on what am I
[TS]
00:23:34
◼
►
thinking like I think your thing is your
[TS]
00:23:36
◼
►
idea is brilliant like what do I want
[TS]
00:23:38
◼
►
ten times more I i well i was i was
[TS]
00:23:41
◼
►
going to say it before you started
[TS]
00:23:42
◼
►
publicly agreeing with me but I think
[TS]
00:23:43
◼
►
that's a good way to be honestly have a
[TS]
00:23:46
◼
►
car here but I i think i think boy
[TS]
00:23:48
◼
►
anybody getting I mean like yours when
[TS]
00:23:52
◼
►
you start becoming dependent on what
[TS]
00:23:54
◼
►
anybody else thinks you're a little bit
[TS]
00:23:56
◼
►
well so the weird thing about this this
[TS]
00:23:59
◼
►
this Atkins because i have no you know
[TS]
00:24:01
◼
►
I've never gone on a diet before but
[TS]
00:24:03
◼
►
that the only reason I think this is it
[TS]
00:24:05
◼
►
not a leopard traditional ties well sure
[TS]
00:24:08
◼
►
I mean it's not easy and forget if you
[TS]
00:24:10
◼
►
took some graph paper in HB pencil
[TS]
00:24:12
◼
►
you've been on some extremely
[TS]
00:24:14
◼
►
interesting inconsistent diets it's true
[TS]
00:24:16
◼
►
it's true and one could argue that
[TS]
00:24:17
◼
►
walking six months in one direction is a
[TS]
00:24:20
◼
►
kind of joint as a kind of diet
[TS]
00:24:21
◼
►
yeah but I but this is the first time
[TS]
00:24:25
◼
►
that I have in my entire life Hadfield
[TS]
00:24:27
◼
►
44 years old my mind fully like
[TS]
00:24:30
◼
►
consciously said I'm going to make this
[TS]
00:24:31
◼
►
kind of a change in my intern right
[TS]
00:24:33
◼
►
right because up until now i have always
[TS]
00:24:36
◼
►
preferred to feel like i am as God made
[TS]
00:24:40
◼
►
me and he and throw what you have at me
[TS]
00:24:44
◼
►
and I will and I will consume it and i
[TS]
00:24:47
◼
►
will pick up salad i forgot throws it i
[TS]
00:24:50
◼
►
will make poo out of anything and now
[TS]
00:24:56
◼
►
I'm you know I'm concentrating on this
[TS]
00:24:58
◼
►
and I you know I did not weigh myself i
[TS]
00:25:00
◼
►
have not weighed myself because the
[TS]
00:25:01
◼
►
point that the point of this exercise
[TS]
00:25:04
◼
►
for me is to is really to go through a
[TS]
00:25:07
◼
►
door make a transition into a new way of
[TS]
00:25:11
◼
►
thinking which isn't a diet is a little
[TS]
00:25:15
◼
►
bit of a misnomer read a diet is this
[TS]
00:25:16
◼
►
thing the crazy people do for bikini
[TS]
00:25:18
◼
►
season but you sound like you're trying
[TS]
00:25:20
◼
►
to do something more different it's a
[TS]
00:25:22
◼
►
it's a thought technology right it is a
[TS]
00:25:25
◼
►
detective mindfulness yes that I am
[TS]
00:25:28
◼
►
constantly on and now i am extending
[TS]
00:25:30
◼
►
that that Truman Show bubble to include
[TS]
00:25:33
◼
►
also the things that I eat and what is
[TS]
00:25:38
◼
►
astonishing is that I actually feel that
[TS]
00:25:44
◼
►
I have stepped off a rollercoaster like
[TS]
00:25:49
◼
►
I do not in I do not enjoy eating this
[TS]
00:25:52
◼
►
way there is no you know there is no fun
[TS]
00:25:55
◼
►
in it that the second time I went into a
[TS]
00:25:57
◼
►
restaurant and order to double cheese
[TS]
00:25:59
◼
►
burger with no bun and SAT and ate it
[TS]
00:26:02
◼
►
out of a out of styrofoam container with
[TS]
00:26:04
◼
►
a plastic knife and fork high resolution
[TS]
00:26:07
◼
►
life felt yeah I felt like somebody had
[TS]
00:26:10
◼
►
taken my shoelaces because they were
[TS]
00:26:13
◼
►
worried I was going to hang myself in my
[TS]
00:26:14
◼
►
prison cell like it was I was like what
[TS]
00:26:17
◼
►
what has become of me like I ordered and
[TS]
00:26:19
◼
►
the person by the cash register was like
[TS]
00:26:21
◼
►
there's another one to take you know
[TS]
00:26:23
◼
►
like the new out the new know how to
[TS]
00:26:24
◼
►
throw up to two burger patties but i
[TS]
00:26:28
◼
►
don't i don't necessarily enjoy it but
[TS]
00:26:30
◼
►
this this fog that I felt like has been
[TS]
00:26:34
◼
►
on me for years
[TS]
00:26:37
◼
►
dislike this up-and-down up-and-down
[TS]
00:26:40
◼
►
kind of crazy crazy energy fluctuations
[TS]
00:26:45
◼
►
is is gone in two weeks I just I just I
[TS]
00:26:50
◼
►
just have this steady amount of energy
[TS]
00:26:53
◼
►
all day long i do not have not taken a
[TS]
00:26:57
◼
►
nap in the last two weeks or in the last
[TS]
00:27:01
◼
►
10 days and no nap
[TS]
00:27:04
◼
►
I mean a nap is like that's the whole
[TS]
00:27:08
◼
►
reason I get up in the morning is to
[TS]
00:27:10
◼
►
start looking forward to the nap in the
[TS]
00:27:11
◼
►
afternoon right and now it's just like I
[TS]
00:27:14
◼
►
it sounds like your sugar is stabilized
[TS]
00:27:16
◼
►
I'm not peeking i'm not i'm not i don't
[TS]
00:27:19
◼
►
feel like I'm drowning anymore under
[TS]
00:27:21
◼
►
exhaustion and I'm just puttering along
[TS]
00:27:25
◼
►
and it's like and this is just I'm not
[TS]
00:27:28
◼
►
even really taking care of myself i'm
[TS]
00:27:30
◼
►
just eating well you know one step at a
[TS]
00:27:32
◼
►
time one step at a time right
[TS]
00:27:34
◼
►
that's you know that's part of that I
[TS]
00:27:36
◼
►
don't think you're only probably guilty
[TS]
00:27:38
◼
►
of this i know i have been is that kind
[TS]
00:27:39
◼
►
of black and white thinking again
[TS]
00:27:41
◼
►
thinking of the PETA thing well you know
[TS]
00:27:43
◼
►
if I can't get rid of every conceivable
[TS]
00:27:45
◼
►
animal product in my life I should
[TS]
00:27:47
◼
►
probably keep torturing animals like
[TS]
00:27:48
◼
►
that that Cesaro internet thinking that
[TS]
00:27:50
◼
►
people go through like the idea of
[TS]
00:27:52
◼
►
hypocrisy that makes people just be
[TS]
00:27:54
◼
►
permanently stuck in like in silly
[TS]
00:27:56
◼
►
mediocrity
[TS]
00:27:57
◼
►
but you know i mean take stones i take
[TS]
00:27:59
◼
►
stones from being like I could give a
[TS]
00:28:01
◼
►
fuck about this like I'm going to give a
[TS]
00:28:03
◼
►
little bit of the fuck about this
[TS]
00:28:04
◼
►
yeah a little right and and and not and
[TS]
00:28:07
◼
►
not get all I'm not getting all crazy on
[TS]
00:28:09
◼
►
myself i'm not i didn't like go into my
[TS]
00:28:11
◼
►
freezer and and start to like the
[TS]
00:28:15
◼
►
throwing out all the Brooklyn yeah
[TS]
00:28:18
◼
►
throwing all the popsicles on a bonfire
[TS]
00:28:20
◼
►
in the backyard under a giant golden
[TS]
00:28:22
◼
►
eagle evangelizing no I mean only only
[TS]
00:28:26
◼
►
so much only so much as you and I have
[TS]
00:28:28
◼
►
not talked about it a couple times
[TS]
00:28:30
◼
►
that a is even then I feel awkward
[TS]
00:28:34
◼
►
except that I i feel like something
[TS]
00:28:36
◼
►
somehow you and I are past the point of
[TS]
00:28:38
◼
►
even trying not to you know bore the
[TS]
00:28:42
◼
►
shit out of people were just where we
[TS]
00:28:44
◼
►
are devoted to this cause i'm talking
[TS]
00:28:49
◼
►
about arpu food Hitler Hitler a little
[TS]
00:28:53
◼
►
bit of Hitler belgium comes up some now
[TS]
00:28:56
◼
►
and again I gotta learn more about
[TS]
00:28:58
◼
►
Belgium you know it's a fascinating
[TS]
00:29:00
◼
►
country i'm very happy to hear this
[TS]
00:29:02
◼
►
I i fell off the wagon with the eating
[TS]
00:29:05
◼
►
better in the last few weeks you know
[TS]
00:29:07
◼
►
its application stuff and started
[TS]
00:29:10
◼
►
kindergarten today so things have been a
[TS]
00:29:12
◼
►
little bit crazy but I'm gonna get back
[TS]
00:29:14
◼
►
into it because I remember that feeling
[TS]
00:29:16
◼
►
yeah and there's this one very hard to
[TS]
00:29:20
◼
►
be doing another podcast here but
[TS]
00:29:21
◼
►
there's something I've said a lot that i
[TS]
00:29:23
◼
►
really believe which is like once you
[TS]
00:29:24
◼
►
lose 30 pounds like potato chips don't
[TS]
00:29:27
◼
►
look as good right and the only reason i
[TS]
00:29:29
◼
►
can say that with such authority
[TS]
00:29:31
◼
►
I mean honestly to me was french fries
[TS]
00:29:32
◼
►
like the only reason i can say that with
[TS]
00:29:34
◼
►
authority is because i went from 36 to
[TS]
00:29:37
◼
►
33 and I really felt the difference you
[TS]
00:29:40
◼
►
know I I mean the thing is I when I walk
[TS]
00:29:43
◼
►
up the hill and I have to carry my
[TS]
00:29:44
◼
►
daughter I sometimes think when she was
[TS]
00:29:46
◼
►
younger I would think wow this this was
[TS]
00:29:47
◼
►
me everyday
[TS]
00:29:48
◼
►
yeah like I used to have to carry like a
[TS]
00:29:50
◼
►
small person when I walked up you know a
[TS]
00:29:53
◼
►
20-degree hill or whatever it was just
[TS]
00:29:55
◼
►
one person one person that was clutching
[TS]
00:29:57
◼
►
at your intestinal please check if she's
[TS]
00:30:00
◼
►
awake she could grab on
[TS]
00:30:01
◼
►
but like now is that extra little person
[TS]
00:30:03
◼
►
was a little bit of me and like it boy
[TS]
00:30:05
◼
►
ok I just you know let's rewind for just
[TS]
00:30:09
◼
►
a second did you say today was her first
[TS]
00:30:11
◼
►
day of kindergarten
[TS]
00:30:12
◼
►
yeah Mike pretty big deal
[TS]
00:30:16
◼
►
wow yeah it was a it was you
[TS]
00:30:19
◼
►
yeah anyway hey you know what we're
[TS]
00:30:20
◼
►
doing nothing just wasn't what was their
[TS]
00:30:23
◼
►
coloring and stuff was it was it fine
[TS]
00:30:25
◼
►
when she okay to go to school I i love
[TS]
00:30:28
◼
►
her school but you know don't get me
[TS]
00:30:31
◼
►
started on institutions you know I just
[TS]
00:30:33
◼
►
this is what I'm worried about because
[TS]
00:30:34
◼
►
where we are investigating we have
[TS]
00:30:36
◼
►
joined a co-op that's a week we didn't
[TS]
00:30:38
◼
►
call for three years my doctor today are
[TS]
00:30:40
◼
►
my uh my daughter to post doc
[TS]
00:30:42
◼
►
that her preschool well so they do next
[TS]
00:30:44
◼
►
year yeah they sent out an email and
[TS]
00:30:46
◼
►
they were like we need we need people we
[TS]
00:30:50
◼
►
need sunshine helpers we need what did
[TS]
00:30:55
◼
►
they want
[TS]
00:30:56
◼
►
okay I'm just gonna brace yourself
[TS]
00:30:58
◼
►
because you think you if you think you
[TS]
00:31:00
◼
►
been experiencing it
[TS]
00:31:01
◼
►
sorry is that never by eight if you've
[TS]
00:31:03
◼
►
been living in that kind of you know
[TS]
00:31:05
◼
►
weird parenting bubble get ready because
[TS]
00:31:08
◼
►
it's gonna be so much of your
[TS]
00:31:09
◼
►
personality you're just gonna have to
[TS]
00:31:11
◼
►
let go of when you're around a lot of
[TS]
00:31:12
◼
►
places i mean we have to select through
[TS]
00:31:15
◼
►
so many discussions that are very poorly
[TS]
00:31:18
◼
►
organized there's going to be a lot of
[TS]
00:31:20
◼
►
forms that could have been laid out a
[TS]
00:31:21
◼
►
lot better
[TS]
00:31:22
◼
►
there's a lot of signs with you know bad
[TS]
00:31:25
◼
►
punctuation and typography comic sounds
[TS]
00:31:27
◼
►
comic sans or like there's the one the
[TS]
00:31:31
◼
►
one that my daughter's teacher uses just
[TS]
00:31:32
◼
►
it's it's not it's not pathetic is not
[TS]
00:31:36
◼
►
aerial it's kind of a stylized like you
[TS]
00:31:39
◼
►
know future up meats like a stork it's
[TS]
00:31:42
◼
►
just me but no I i suffered under that
[TS]
00:31:45
◼
►
and also I think there's a lot of hazing
[TS]
00:31:47
◼
►
I think that people who are very
[TS]
00:31:48
◼
►
comfortable being like a suburban mom or
[TS]
00:31:51
◼
►
dad and they take it out on people like
[TS]
00:31:52
◼
►
you and me
[TS]
00:31:53
◼
►
yeah we're just gonna not was not
[TS]
00:31:55
◼
►
totally like hipster tattoo doofuses
[TS]
00:31:58
◼
►
with barbells in their nose but we're
[TS]
00:32:00
◼
►
also not like wearing-- castle loafers
[TS]
00:32:02
◼
►
like we are the Forgotten men i I'll i
[TS]
00:32:08
◼
►
want to i want to be on the board of
[TS]
00:32:10
◼
►
directors just because just because it's
[TS]
00:32:13
◼
►
obvious cuz that's where I belong you
[TS]
00:32:15
◼
►
should have a coup and then very shortly
[TS]
00:32:17
◼
►
after that become the you know just like
[TS]
00:32:19
◼
►
either eliminate the board of directors
[TS]
00:32:21
◼
►
or making it right there with you know
[TS]
00:32:25
◼
►
the coop chats kick ya put it put it up
[TS]
00:32:28
◼
►
to a vote that there that that there
[TS]
00:32:30
◼
►
should be that all board board of
[TS]
00:32:32
◼
►
directors are equal except some are more
[TS]
00:32:35
◼
►
equal than others
[TS]
00:32:36
◼
►
maybe you should does stage like arson
[TS]
00:32:38
◼
►
of the art room
[TS]
00:32:40
◼
►
well with other people is just just like
[TS]
00:32:43
◼
►
it's like your own personal personal
[TS]
00:32:45
◼
►
rights dog icepick the the assistant
[TS]
00:32:48
◼
►
teacher what I'm what I'm afraid of
[TS]
00:32:51
◼
►
is everything I am absolutely one
[TS]
00:32:54
◼
►
hundred percent afraid of being in a
[TS]
00:32:58
◼
►
position of well basically having to
[TS]
00:33:02
◼
►
subjugate myself to the Borg it's so i
[TS]
00:33:10
◼
►
found it i have no one to talk to about
[TS]
00:33:12
◼
►
this i found it's so difficult
[TS]
00:33:15
◼
►
it made me realize i'm not saying this
[TS]
00:33:16
◼
►
is you but me and made me realize how
[TS]
00:33:18
◼
►
much of a man-child i am in some ways
[TS]
00:33:20
◼
►
like I'm so used to like I I don't like
[TS]
00:33:25
◼
►
having to like it should be fucking
[TS]
00:33:27
◼
►
40-some years to get to where I like I
[TS]
00:33:29
◼
►
don't hate my personality and so I think
[TS]
00:33:32
◼
►
I'm almost like out of this Merlin
[TS]
00:33:33
◼
►
closet or like I just I I'm very
[TS]
00:33:35
◼
►
reluctant to go gently into someone
[TS]
00:33:38
◼
►
else's goodnight right now you ever let
[TS]
00:33:41
◼
►
me hear you roar
[TS]
00:33:42
◼
►
well I don't have to be like I don't
[TS]
00:33:43
◼
►
have to be a cock don't have to always
[TS]
00:33:44
◼
►
be the center of attention but at the
[TS]
00:33:46
◼
►
same time there's like there's just
[TS]
00:33:47
◼
►
there's a lot of times when I've had to
[TS]
00:33:49
◼
►
go like okay I've worked on my own for a
[TS]
00:33:50
◼
►
lot of years I've had gotten to be like
[TS]
00:33:53
◼
►
whatever it is that i am for a lot of
[TS]
00:33:55
◼
►
years and there's times when you're the
[TS]
00:33:57
◼
►
first meeting at my daughter's co-op
[TS]
00:33:58
◼
►
school which was i I mean like I will I
[TS]
00:34:01
◼
►
can't imagine my daughter ever going to
[TS]
00:34:02
◼
►
another school is great as her co-op
[TS]
00:34:03
◼
►
school weekend my wife mostly work there
[TS]
00:34:05
◼
►
I work there
[TS]
00:34:06
◼
►
it's great it's great gig it's so much
[TS]
00:34:08
◼
►
less expensive than like a regular like
[TS]
00:34:10
◼
►
you know penitentiary style Driscoll
[TS]
00:34:14
◼
►
because you're there you're it's it's a
[TS]
00:34:15
◼
►
great way to watch your kid get better
[TS]
00:34:16
◼
►
at being a kid but and you learn to
[TS]
00:34:18
◼
►
watercolor again but you know it's also
[TS]
00:34:21
◼
►
it's cool because like the people there
[TS]
00:34:23
◼
►
who are dicks have a stake in it like
[TS]
00:34:25
◼
►
there are people who still want to like
[TS]
00:34:26
◼
►
just drop the kids off and drive away
[TS]
00:34:28
◼
►
but there's a lot of people there who
[TS]
00:34:29
◼
►
were there because they believe in the
[TS]
00:34:30
◼
►
school they believe what's going on
[TS]
00:34:32
◼
►
you can take that too far and like
[TS]
00:34:33
◼
►
heaven some of these schools they make
[TS]
00:34:35
◼
►
you read a book before you can go there
[TS]
00:34:36
◼
►
like they have like I too was a temp
[TS]
00:34:39
◼
►
homocysteine out a persuasive theory
[TS]
00:34:42
◼
►
like the HP this place has a different
[TS]
00:34:45
◼
►
like philosophy but the I don't want to
[TS]
00:34:48
◼
►
have my commitment to smart sparkle
[TS]
00:34:50
◼
►
motion doubt it
[TS]
00:34:51
◼
►
no no no butBut you know but here's the
[TS]
00:34:53
◼
►
thing it the first thing that well two
[TS]
00:34:56
◼
►
things from just quickly in this case
[TS]
00:34:58
◼
►
first of all that like how much I showed
[TS]
00:35:01
◼
►
up feeling like of course i always feel
[TS]
00:35:02
◼
►
like the worst father in the world no
[TS]
00:35:03
◼
►
matter where i go i'm always liked my
[TS]
00:35:05
◼
►
gosh there's so many things I could be
[TS]
00:35:06
◼
►
doing so much better but I got there
[TS]
00:35:08
◼
►
kidding me
[TS]
00:35:08
◼
►
do you honestly feel that way yeah and
[TS]
00:35:11
◼
►
and I got there anything like two
[TS]
00:35:12
◼
►
minutes i felt like i was a student
[TS]
00:35:14
◼
►
council meeting because it was it was
[TS]
00:35:16
◼
►
like but at the greatest school in the
[TS]
00:35:17
◼
►
world was like the people who like where
[TS]
00:35:20
◼
►
the you know as you say that the board
[TS]
00:35:21
◼
►
of directors or whatever like the people
[TS]
00:35:22
◼
►
who were like the head of the
[TS]
00:35:24
◼
►
three-year-olds group the four-year-old
[TS]
00:35:25
◼
►
trip it was just like student council
[TS]
00:35:27
◼
►
and it was it was like this weird but
[TS]
00:35:29
◼
►
not popularity contest but there are
[TS]
00:35:31
◼
►
some people who cared so intensely about
[TS]
00:35:33
◼
►
governing like you know whether you had
[TS]
00:35:35
◼
►
to wear shoes in the bike area or
[TS]
00:35:37
◼
►
whatever and second the first meeting I
[TS]
00:35:39
◼
►
ever want to at this school the greatest
[TS]
00:35:41
◼
►
of all schools they talked about the
[TS]
00:35:43
◼
►
problem of chicken poop for 25 minutes
[TS]
00:35:47
◼
►
because this one is for chicken to run
[TS]
00:35:49
◼
►
around IC and apparently one of the moms
[TS]
00:35:52
◼
►
was pretty upset because some of the
[TS]
00:35:54
◼
►
chicken matter had gotten on to her
[TS]
00:35:57
◼
►
child's shoe and that came into the
[TS]
00:35:59
◼
►
house and that led to a larger
[TS]
00:36:00
◼
►
discussion of just sanitation in general
[TS]
00:36:02
◼
►
and like should we even have chickens it
[TS]
00:36:04
◼
►
off we have chickens
[TS]
00:36:05
◼
►
should there be somebody who's
[TS]
00:36:06
◼
►
monitoring the the chicken area more
[TS]
00:36:08
◼
►
closely right and you know your question
[TS]
00:36:11
◼
►
that's like that i think it's attributed
[TS]
00:36:12
◼
►
to Kissinger you know start to go
[TS]
00:36:14
◼
►
through your head you know the stakes
[TS]
00:36:15
◼
►
are some steaks for supper but you know
[TS]
00:36:17
◼
►
but but I'm sorry I'm going on but I
[TS]
00:36:20
◼
►
want the big pattern here is like for me
[TS]
00:36:22
◼
►
it's one thing to sit around and poison
[TS]
00:36:25
◼
►
my daughter's mind with with comics but
[TS]
00:36:28
◼
►
like then i have to go up and be around
[TS]
00:36:29
◼
►
other people and even like the coolest
[TS]
00:36:30
◼
►
people in the world I feel like I'm
[TS]
00:36:32
◼
►
always like I it's pushing me forward
[TS]
00:36:35
◼
►
because now like my all of my failures
[TS]
00:36:37
◼
►
exposed all these people and but that I
[TS]
00:36:40
◼
►
would not trade that experience for the
[TS]
00:36:42
◼
►
I mean it was you know a you know what
[TS]
00:36:45
◼
►
is the last thing on this it's like it's
[TS]
00:36:47
◼
►
like hiring a doula or it is like
[TS]
00:36:50
◼
►
finding a psychiatrist
[TS]
00:36:52
◼
►
it is like finding a mate like don't
[TS]
00:36:56
◼
►
start with the role like start with
[TS]
00:36:58
◼
►
finding somebody that you like like
[TS]
00:36:59
◼
►
we're gonna find a school that you like
[TS]
00:37:01
◼
►
before you find a school
[TS]
00:37:02
◼
►
you got a problem is the problem with
[TS]
00:37:04
◼
►
that Merlin is that I rejected the idea
[TS]
00:37:06
◼
►
of a doula
[TS]
00:37:07
◼
►
and why we please talk to liz its
[TS]
00:37:10
◼
►
endpoint and I reject the idea of a
[TS]
00:37:12
◼
►
psychiatrist and I and I'm for education
[TS]
00:37:17
◼
►
really have not have not fully embraced
[TS]
00:37:20
◼
►
the idea of finding a mate
[TS]
00:37:22
◼
►
what about chickens got a thought and I
[TS]
00:37:24
◼
►
don't have chickens don't everybody
[TS]
00:37:26
◼
►
don't have heritage chickens and
[TS]
00:37:28
◼
►
everybody comes over to my house says
[TS]
00:37:29
◼
►
you have a barn every year everybody in
[TS]
00:37:31
◼
►
the city is buying chickens
[TS]
00:37:34
◼
►
you're the only guy that has that
[TS]
00:37:35
◼
►
actually has a barn
[TS]
00:37:37
◼
►
why don't you have chickens and I'm like
[TS]
00:37:38
◼
►
right because chickens because why do
[TS]
00:37:41
◼
►
you need fucking chickens right exactly
[TS]
00:37:43
◼
►
except my legs really show up and within
[TS]
00:37:45
◼
►
it within a month like you get your
[TS]
00:37:47
◼
►
tattoo you get your fixie and get two
[TS]
00:37:49
◼
►
chickens
[TS]
00:37:49
◼
►
well here's I feel like a weird but I
[TS]
00:37:51
◼
►
feel about the chicken you have is
[TS]
00:37:53
◼
►
chicken or chicken that thing they're
[TS]
00:37:54
◼
►
chickens are huge and everything
[TS]
00:37:55
◼
►
everywhere
[TS]
00:37:56
◼
►
okay what what I feel about the chickens
[TS]
00:37:58
◼
►
and the and the organic farming both of
[TS]
00:38:01
◼
►
which things I am encouraged by every
[TS]
00:38:03
◼
►
person who comes here to embark upon
[TS]
00:38:06
◼
►
like why aren't you
[TS]
00:38:08
◼
►
I looks like a little suggestion box for
[TS]
00:38:10
◼
►
John's house why are things I can't
[TS]
00:38:11
◼
►
believe John is an icy winds our why
[TS]
00:38:14
◼
►
don't you make why don't you build a big
[TS]
00:38:16
◼
►
organic garden and what I realize about
[TS]
00:38:18
◼
►
those things that is that those are
[TS]
00:38:20
◼
►
mating rituals that you once you and
[TS]
00:38:24
◼
►
your partner have exhausted all of the
[TS]
00:38:28
◼
►
episodic television and you are staring
[TS]
00:38:30
◼
►
across the breakfast table at one
[TS]
00:38:32
◼
►
another and contemplating being together
[TS]
00:38:35
◼
►
for decades and you realize like I don't
[TS]
00:38:41
◼
►
want to be like my parents I don't want
[TS]
00:38:42
◼
►
to be like my grandparents what are we
[TS]
00:38:43
◼
►
going to do you embark upon a mutual
[TS]
00:38:46
◼
►
project like starting a garden where you
[TS]
00:38:49
◼
►
are now going to eat out of this garden
[TS]
00:38:51
◼
►
it's a merry old time
[TS]
00:38:53
◼
►
but it's really a way of it's a it's a
[TS]
00:38:57
◼
►
way of of stitching your relationship
[TS]
00:39:00
◼
►
together with a kind of mutual you know
[TS]
00:39:04
◼
►
like here are values in bright red tape
[TS]
00:39:08
◼
►
and we're living our were walking our
[TS]
00:39:11
◼
►
talk and we're living our life together
[TS]
00:39:13
◼
►
and for me as a bachelor the idea of
[TS]
00:39:16
◼
►
going out and killing a little organic
[TS]
00:39:18
◼
►
garden for myself again feels like a
[TS]
00:39:22
◼
►
prison activity take think they take
[TS]
00:39:25
◼
►
your shoelaces the way they give you to
[TS]
00:39:26
◼
►
hamburger patties with cheese in a
[TS]
00:39:28
◼
►
styrofoam bucket and then you've got
[TS]
00:39:30
◼
►
like your six-by-eight plot and you're
[TS]
00:39:34
◼
►
out there you're out there trying to
[TS]
00:39:36
◼
►
keep the rabbits out of your letters and
[TS]
00:39:39
◼
►
that's what keeps you
[TS]
00:39:40
◼
►
let's do you remember thinking
[TS]
00:39:42
◼
►
everybody's like in college like I would
[TS]
00:39:44
◼
►
meet i would meet a lady and like we
[TS]
00:39:47
◼
►
would just sit and get going to like you
[TS]
00:39:49
◼
►
know like if you leave the party you'd
[TS]
00:39:52
◼
►
be xing it go to like an abandoned
[TS]
00:39:54
◼
►
classroom and you could talk for 18
[TS]
00:39:56
◼
►
hours just talking just talk about
[TS]
00:39:57
◼
►
whatever talk about the flintstones
[TS]
00:39:58
◼
►
whatever she fly her forehead on your
[TS]
00:40:00
◼
►
shoes it be in the dark you like quite a
[TS]
00:40:03
◼
►
thing yet it was just a kind of talking
[TS]
00:40:06
◼
►
about whatever he's talking about
[TS]
00:40:07
◼
►
whatever man whatever its just oh my god
[TS]
00:40:10
◼
►
you too
[TS]
00:40:10
◼
►
oh my god and then you need projects
[TS]
00:40:13
◼
►
when you get older and let's be honest
[TS]
00:40:14
◼
►
the biggest project is a kid right now i
[TS]
00:40:16
◼
►
have somebody that this is probably a
[TS]
00:40:18
◼
►
very old cliché it's probably like you
[TS]
00:40:19
◼
►
know like a more solid joke or something
[TS]
00:40:20
◼
►
but like you know when you will run out
[TS]
00:40:22
◼
►
of things to talk to somebody like
[TS]
00:40:25
◼
►
that's when the words will you marry me
[TS]
00:40:26
◼
►
right well your mouth and and all you
[TS]
00:40:29
◼
►
have to do is go to an ikea on a
[TS]
00:40:30
◼
►
Saturday afternoon and you're seeing all
[TS]
00:40:33
◼
►
the people better that are either right
[TS]
00:40:35
◼
►
before that or were right in the heart
[TS]
00:40:37
◼
►
of its projects projects project just
[TS]
00:40:39
◼
►
you know she's a she's pushing the cart
[TS]
00:40:41
◼
►
and he is kind of walking along beside
[TS]
00:40:44
◼
►
and they are just picking out storage
[TS]
00:40:46
◼
►
solutions is wondering what Swedish for
[TS]
00:40:48
◼
►
ricin and and for me like I did not I
[TS]
00:40:53
◼
►
did not escape it
[TS]
00:40:55
◼
►
i but i but i but I went through a lot
[TS]
00:40:58
◼
►
of those sort of as solo like I built a
[TS]
00:41:04
◼
►
nest for myself here unconscious
[TS]
00:41:06
◼
►
that that's really what i was doing and
[TS]
00:41:08
◼
►
I did it all by myself so that my house
[TS]
00:41:11
◼
►
looks like uh hunting lodge that that
[TS]
00:41:16
◼
►
where someone set off a grandma bomb but
[TS]
00:41:20
◼
►
there's also there's no and they pick up
[TS]
00:41:21
◼
►
what are you thinking of course right
[TS]
00:41:23
◼
►
not gonna put that there what are you
[TS]
00:41:24
◼
►
doing right there is no one but by the
[TS]
00:41:26
◼
►
time anyone could have said seven
[TS]
00:41:29
◼
►
different mismatched plays paisley
[TS]
00:41:32
◼
►
patterns is not a style it is a mind
[TS]
00:41:37
◼
►
riot by the time anybody could have said
[TS]
00:41:39
◼
►
that to me it was too late
[TS]
00:41:41
◼
►
yeah and they all they could do was
[TS]
00:41:42
◼
►
stand there with their hands on their
[TS]
00:41:43
◼
►
hips and go wow amazing and I'm like I
[TS]
00:41:46
◼
►
know right kind of kind of like kind of
[TS]
00:41:49
◼
►
like tripping out isn't it
[TS]
00:41:51
◼
►
go ahead sit on the couch if you can
[TS]
00:41:52
◼
►
find the couch part so so I'm kind of
[TS]
00:41:57
◼
►
now going through this idea i had not
[TS]
00:41:59
◼
►
thought of it this way i really had nine
[TS]
00:42:01
◼
►
there was nobody to keep me from buying
[TS]
00:42:04
◼
►
10 copies of The Adventures of
[TS]
00:42:06
◼
►
Huckleberry Finn because i was afraid
[TS]
00:42:08
◼
►
that it was gonna get banned and I was
[TS]
00:42:11
◼
►
gonna have the last stash of them to
[TS]
00:42:13
◼
►
hand out to people on the street there
[TS]
00:42:15
◼
►
was no one to stop me from decorating my
[TS]
00:42:19
◼
►
house with amplifiers and I have built a
[TS]
00:42:23
◼
►
nest you're there John I really am and I
[TS]
00:42:26
◼
►
know you're like Michael you're like
[TS]
00:42:27
◼
►
Berkeley I don't love everything you do
[TS]
00:42:29
◼
►
but I'm so glad you're there
[TS]
00:42:30
◼
►
haha but the but the problem is that now
[TS]
00:42:34
◼
►
I have built a nest and now i have a
[TS]
00:42:36
◼
►
child and I am that and the child's
[TS]
00:42:38
◼
►
mother and I are very close and we live
[TS]
00:42:41
◼
►
in a very kind of communal atmosphere it
[TS]
00:42:44
◼
►
you know in a way is everything that I
[TS]
00:42:47
◼
►
if you had asked me 10 years ago like
[TS]
00:42:50
◼
►
how I imagined it
[TS]
00:42:52
◼
►
it is that it has happened but but i
[TS]
00:42:56
◼
►
have i've maintained so much of my own
[TS]
00:42:58
◼
►
like I kept my my back
[TS]
00:43:07
◼
►
up my castle and now i'm now i'm in the
[TS]
00:43:11
◼
►
in this castle and I feel a little
[TS]
00:43:14
◼
►
ridiculous like that the castle grounds
[TS]
00:43:17
◼
►
are all being guarded by other yeah
[TS]
00:43:18
◼
►
that's the pre-filter John you should
[TS]
00:43:20
◼
►
not feel ridiculous way I'm standing up
[TS]
00:43:23
◼
►
here with my flag
[TS]
00:43:25
◼
►
you know I have a collection of flags
[TS]
00:43:26
◼
►
yeah and and i realized today because
[TS]
00:43:29
◼
►
our our good friend cat Miriam yeah so I
[TS]
00:43:36
◼
►
my friend of the show and the show I
[TS]
00:43:38
◼
►
think she might whenever I have around
[TS]
00:43:40
◼
►
the city but I think she might be our uh
[TS]
00:43:41
◼
►
amongst other things are official
[TS]
00:43:43
◼
►
statistician well I and anna and I'm
[TS]
00:43:46
◼
►
beginning to feel like chief archivist
[TS]
00:43:47
◼
►
but-but-but so I post a picture of a
[TS]
00:43:52
◼
►
jacket that i have that i thought was
[TS]
00:43:54
◼
►
like a vintage could you donate Navy
[TS]
00:43:58
◼
►
officers code like it's clearly a
[TS]
00:44:00
◼
►
captain's jacket I thought maybe like
[TS]
00:44:03
◼
►
french coast guard auxiliary I wasn't
[TS]
00:44:06
◼
►
sure but I posted a picture of this i
[TS]
00:44:08
◼
►
was trying to crowdsource wear this
[TS]
00:44:10
◼
►
jacket was from and I got your usual
[TS]
00:44:13
◼
►
snarky answers from everybody and then I
[TS]
00:44:17
◼
►
that and then some legit fucking
[TS]
00:44:20
◼
►
question some legit tries people were
[TS]
00:44:22
◼
►
like I don't believe that's an American
[TS]
00:44:23
◼
►
and I was like well right but what is it
[TS]
00:44:26
◼
►
and it was like not US military there
[TS]
00:44:28
◼
►
were some people taking some stabs at it
[TS]
00:44:29
◼
►
and then she comes in out of the blue
[TS]
00:44:32
◼
►
with a link to the this exact jacket and
[TS]
00:44:37
◼
►
I didn't even post a whole picture but i
[TS]
00:44:39
◼
►
just posted a picture of the sleeve
[TS]
00:44:40
◼
►
she's good she has the entire jacket and
[TS]
00:44:42
◼
►
it is a yacht club Commodore retired
[TS]
00:44:48
◼
►
dress blues and I was like so close and
[TS]
00:44:55
◼
►
yet so far
[TS]
00:44:55
◼
►
how did this how did this fight I mean
[TS]
00:44:58
◼
►
it's like I want wherever I got this
[TS]
00:45:00
◼
►
it must have it must have crawled out of
[TS]
00:45:04
◼
►
the truck and situated itself on top of
[TS]
00:45:07
◼
►
an of a rafter and as I was walking by
[TS]
00:45:09
◼
►
it left we got yacht club Commodore
[TS]
00:45:13
◼
►
common tired ret
[TS]
00:45:15
◼
►
right okay former Commodores so there's
[TS]
00:45:19
◼
►
a current company for the current
[TS]
00:45:20
◼
►
Commodore of the yacht club he wears a
[TS]
00:45:23
◼
►
different coat
[TS]
00:45:24
◼
►
ok this is this is the the former the
[TS]
00:45:28
◼
►
former Commodore if once once a comment
[TS]
00:45:31
◼
►
or always a comedy ask marine so it once
[TS]
00:45:34
◼
►
you have been the Commodore of your
[TS]
00:45:35
◼
►
yacht club you graduate you are always
[TS]
00:45:37
◼
►
able to wear this gentleman door and
[TS]
00:45:39
◼
►
there is America's which is a fantastic
[TS]
00:45:41
◼
►
it's a fantastic code and and so then
[TS]
00:45:45
◼
►
i'm online i am researching yacht club
[TS]
00:45:48
◼
►
literally typing its greatness be fired
[TS]
00:45:52
◼
►
yacht club Commodore yacht club
[TS]
00:45:54
◼
►
Commodore former right um and I'm so I'm
[TS]
00:45:59
◼
►
now i'm in this yacht club world i had
[TS]
00:46:00
◼
►
no idea that members of yacht clubs had
[TS]
00:46:02
◼
►
ranks there's an entire ranking system
[TS]
00:46:04
◼
►
as as as like elaborate and bizarre as
[TS]
00:46:10
◼
►
the as the very essence of congolese
[TS]
00:46:14
◼
►
navy or whatever it's got let you know
[TS]
00:46:16
◼
►
you could you can you can be a bosun's
[TS]
00:46:18
◼
►
mate it the yacht club anyway I'm i'm
[TS]
00:46:22
◼
►
flipping through this and all of a
[TS]
00:46:23
◼
►
sudden I see these flags which I've had
[TS]
00:46:26
◼
►
I have a flag with a giant acorn on it
[TS]
00:46:29
◼
►
and a flag with crossed feathers on it
[TS]
00:46:32
◼
►
and I've had them for a long time I
[TS]
00:46:35
◼
►
their part of my collection of flags and
[TS]
00:46:39
◼
►
I learned in on this website that the
[TS]
00:46:42
◼
►
acorn is the flag that you fly from your
[TS]
00:46:44
◼
►
yacht if you are the treasurer of the ox
[TS]
00:46:48
◼
►
0 because the treasure is collecting
[TS]
00:46:52
◼
►
acorns for the this is international or
[TS]
00:46:56
◼
►
mean if you are a yacht club in but this
[TS]
00:46:57
◼
►
is this is in a book somewhere this is
[TS]
00:46:59
◼
►
codified yeah right and the cross
[TS]
00:47:01
◼
►
feathers of course is the Secretary of
[TS]
00:47:04
◼
►
the yacht club so i'm flying all these
[TS]
00:47:08
◼
►
weird yacht club flags here around
[TS]
00:47:09
◼
►
around the good ship blow Roderick pop
[TS]
00:47:13
◼
►
and I I had no idea what they meant i
[TS]
00:47:18
◼
►
did you and thankies Thank You code
[TS]
00:47:20
◼
►
right yeah Thank oh right i was flying a
[TS]
00:47:22
◼
►
green hanky and my back left pocket i
[TS]
00:47:24
◼
►
didn't know that if I was slippery roads
[TS]
00:47:26
◼
►
right and
[TS]
00:47:28
◼
►
and that Miriam solves all these
[TS]
00:47:32
◼
►
problems in one fell swoop and also
[TS]
00:47:33
◼
►
somehow completely a like completely by
[TS]
00:47:38
◼
►
happenstance I already own a retired
[TS]
00:47:43
◼
►
Commodores jacket I didn't have to go
[TS]
00:47:46
◼
►
through any of the like where is I may
[TS]
00:47:49
◼
►
already have a retired director of CIA
[TS]
00:47:51
◼
►
jacket and I just don't realize that you
[TS]
00:47:54
◼
►
just need to send her some some photos I
[TS]
00:47:57
◼
►
need to send her photos of everything
[TS]
00:47:58
◼
►
she could be your personal archives to
[TS]
00:48:00
◼
►
so I'm saying I think you and you may
[TS]
00:48:02
◼
►
have finally found you you lament this
[TS]
00:48:04
◼
►
every every few months about what you
[TS]
00:48:06
◼
►
gonna do like with the history of all
[TS]
00:48:07
◼
►
the items in your home like how how will
[TS]
00:48:09
◼
►
that be passed on to the future
[TS]
00:48:10
◼
►
generations
[TS]
00:48:11
◼
►
she's very scientific John I don't want
[TS]
00:48:14
◼
►
to go into too much personal detail but
[TS]
00:48:15
◼
►
catamarans very scientific
[TS]
00:48:17
◼
►
all I'm saying is that that that that
[TS]
00:48:19
◼
►
that that mystery at least is solved and
[TS]
00:48:25
◼
►
why it is that I that you know because i
[TS]
00:48:28
◼
►
asked people to solutely when they come
[TS]
00:48:30
◼
►
into the house and at a certain point I
[TS]
00:48:32
◼
►
change to a kind of open-handed salute
[TS]
00:48:34
◼
►
rather than your closed and salute what
[TS]
00:48:37
◼
►
I'm not sure I'm had no nothing like
[TS]
00:48:39
◼
►
Hitler open-handed like you know like a
[TS]
00:48:42
◼
►
a classic sort of got a wave not a wave
[TS]
00:48:45
◼
►
that you're still touching the tip of
[TS]
00:48:47
◼
►
your glasses with the hand ok just your
[TS]
00:48:49
◼
►
palm out so I know what you mean like
[TS]
00:48:53
◼
►
sort of it left hand kinda get it right
[TS]
00:48:55
◼
►
like like you're like you're the the
[TS]
00:48:57
◼
►
governor-general in the Raj let me love
[TS]
00:49:01
◼
►
you let you watch it because I was I was
[TS]
00:49:03
◼
►
I was feeling like a Commodore is it
[TS]
00:49:05
◼
►
fair to say you probably know more about
[TS]
00:49:07
◼
►
military and fake military clothing than
[TS]
00:49:11
◼
►
most people in seattle be honest you
[TS]
00:49:14
◼
►
probably the top i'd be in the top 5% 5%
[TS]
00:49:17
◼
►
ok if you go to the coop meeting like
[TS]
00:49:21
◼
►
the second meeting dressed as a former
[TS]
00:49:24
◼
►
Commodore yeah club people think it's
[TS]
00:49:26
◼
►
pretty fucking weird but if you're
[TS]
00:49:28
◼
►
consistent if you always show up in some
[TS]
00:49:32
◼
►
kind of military garb no one is going to
[TS]
00:49:35
◼
►
fuck with you right but it's but every
[TS]
00:49:37
◼
►
but one day I'm a colonel in the Air
[TS]
00:49:39
◼
►
well one day i'm wearing desert
[TS]
00:49:41
◼
►
fatigues there are people with honorary
[TS]
00:49:44
◼
►
degrees and consoles doctor there's no
[TS]
00:49:46
◼
►
reason you can't be there is no fucking
[TS]
00:49:48
◼
►
reason you can't be an honorary
[TS]
00:49:49
◼
►
Commodore I'm saying is if you show up
[TS]
00:49:50
◼
►
at this place and you and you want to
[TS]
00:49:52
◼
►
have this is a certain will to power
[TS]
00:49:54
◼
►
you may be able to go in there dress for
[TS]
00:49:56
◼
►
the job you want to write well but this
[TS]
00:49:58
◼
►
is the thing I don't want to go up
[TS]
00:49:59
◼
►
I've already begun compiling the the
[TS]
00:50:02
◼
►
uniform of a member of the board of
[TS]
00:50:06
◼
►
directors of your child's up at times it
[TS]
00:50:09
◼
►
felt like at least it would be like a
[TS]
00:50:11
◼
►
patagonia fleece well see now that's
[TS]
00:50:13
◼
►
where you wouldn't have a water bottle i
[TS]
00:50:15
◼
►
have not been to this meeting yet so i'm
[TS]
00:50:18
◼
►
guessing that that's what that's what
[TS]
00:50:20
◼
►
you're gonna follow that is gonna be
[TS]
00:50:21
◼
►
enlisted men think that's right ok got
[TS]
00:50:24
◼
►
it sorry
[TS]
00:50:24
◼
►
so obviously tweed jacket patches on the
[TS]
00:50:30
◼
►
elbows knit squared bottom time it's
[TS]
00:50:35
◼
►
selling Michael Keaton in like a grain
[TS]
00:50:37
◼
►
it that's right no you're absolutely
[TS]
00:50:39
◼
►
right Michael Keaton 83
[TS]
00:50:41
◼
►
yeah black plaid button-down sort of nor
[TS]
00:50:44
◼
►
sport shirt hot smart look I don't know
[TS]
00:50:48
◼
►
though I think the military thing I met
[TS]
00:50:50
◼
►
my am but then crewneck sweater on top
[TS]
00:50:53
◼
►
of the shirt i just saw oceans 11 for
[TS]
00:50:57
◼
►
the first time I think you should bring
[TS]
00:50:59
◼
►
back the the the giant turtle neck
[TS]
00:51:02
◼
►
almost cowl-neck ridiculously large
[TS]
00:51:04
◼
►
turtleneck shirt that like a sweater
[TS]
00:51:06
◼
►
like a big big you don't talk about
[TS]
00:51:08
◼
►
using the movie but for some reason like
[TS]
00:51:09
◼
►
three different guys in the movie
[TS]
00:51:10
◼
►
especially Matt Damon are wearing these
[TS]
00:51:12
◼
►
cool like fishermen kind of sweaters
[TS]
00:51:14
◼
►
like you know vertical ribbing but with
[TS]
00:51:17
◼
►
these giant giant turns out the captain
[TS]
00:51:20
◼
►
haddock sweater em high
[TS]
00:51:22
◼
►
the captain haddock sweater from going
[TS]
00:51:24
◼
►
to get the former captain the retired
[TS]
00:51:26
◼
►
captain had so it's called me look that
[TS]
00:51:27
◼
►
up it's a smart like I could not pull
[TS]
00:51:29
◼
►
that off you would look awesome in that
[TS]
00:51:31
◼
►
you know the thing about captain haddock
[TS]
00:51:33
◼
►
is that his first of all his sweater has
[TS]
00:51:35
◼
►
a giant anchor on it captain and oh and
[TS]
00:51:40
◼
►
apparently the cartoon character but
[TS]
00:51:42
◼
►
yeah yeah what are you not attending
[TS]
00:51:45
◼
►
uh yes haha oh outed outed as a non
[TS]
00:51:53
◼
►
Tintin reader he's got a pipe
[TS]
00:51:55
◼
►
that's gotta understand how he looks a
[TS]
00:51:57
◼
►
little like Bluto that's right i guess
[TS]
00:51:59
◼
►
what else he's from Belgium Belgium l
[TS]
00:52:02
◼
►
jones got no pupils i don't know i have
[TS]
00:52:06
◼
►
mixed feelings because there's two
[TS]
00:52:07
◼
►
minutes two ways you can go with this
[TS]
00:52:08
◼
►
like you can either go with like the
[TS]
00:52:11
◼
►
perhaps inadvisable this guy is
[TS]
00:52:13
◼
►
obviously bananas approach which is he
[TS]
00:52:16
◼
►
might go in is looking ass licker one
[TS]
00:52:19
◼
►
day like the Gorton's fisherman in like
[TS]
00:52:21
◼
►
one day you might go in as like the I
[TS]
00:52:24
◼
►
don't know whatever the Seattle Mariner
[TS]
00:52:25
◼
►
big head mascot is you know Erin Andrews
[TS]
00:52:28
◼
►
mariner moose all had a big head
[TS]
00:52:31
◼
►
they had mascot my kids school today I
[TS]
00:52:33
◼
►
want to get kids cry big lion was the
[TS]
00:52:36
◼
►
person inside of an autistic bring it
[TS]
00:52:43
◼
►
why I'm pretty sure that or you just
[TS]
00:52:46
◼
►
were consistently where the same uniform
[TS]
00:52:48
◼
►
it's all pretty sure that makes my sword
[TS]
00:52:49
◼
►
cane is going to be the thing that just
[TS]
00:52:52
◼
►
that that really gets their attention
[TS]
00:52:53
◼
►
but that's not going to be till meeting
[TS]
00:52:55
◼
►
five a lot of people are going to see it
[TS]
00:52:57
◼
►
go that guy doesn't look like he needs a
[TS]
00:52:59
◼
►
cane and he definitely looks like the
[TS]
00:53:02
◼
►
kind of guy who would like to carry a
[TS]
00:53:03
◼
►
sword so i'm gonna guess that's probably
[TS]
00:53:04
◼
►
a certain game you would think but the
[TS]
00:53:06
◼
►
people appear that the the you know the
[TS]
00:53:08
◼
►
fleece dolls they're like I think that
[TS]
00:53:10
◼
►
the fleece creates a kind of it like off
[TS]
00:53:14
◼
►
gases and it in a dulls your wits for
[TS]
00:53:17
◼
►
combat lot of leaching yeah yeah so no
[TS]
00:53:21
◼
►
no I got the whole idea of the whole
[TS]
00:53:24
◼
►
premise that one day I would be
[TS]
00:53:26
◼
►
jockeying for power in a pre-k co-op is
[TS]
00:53:33
◼
►
like I feel a little bit like I'm
[TS]
00:53:37
◼
►
sitting in one of those little tiny
[TS]
00:53:39
◼
►
desks at a parent-teacher conference
[TS]
00:53:42
◼
►
already
[TS]
00:53:43
◼
►
yeah and I don't know how this I don't
[TS]
00:53:46
◼
►
know how this happened you know you know
[TS]
00:53:48
◼
►
Merlin that that michael anthony hall
[TS]
00:53:58
◼
►
what the hell Molly Ringwald yeah
[TS]
00:54:00
◼
►
they're the same age as me and just that
[TS]
00:54:11
◼
►
itself that that's plenty
[TS]
00:54:12
◼
►
I yeah I just don't know I'm just
[TS]
00:54:14
◼
►
thinking about that today like I don't
[TS]
00:54:16
◼
►
think I knew that at the time I think
[TS]
00:54:19
◼
►
about that a lot i watched i was
[TS]
00:54:20
◼
►
watching Moneyball today that movie in
[TS]
00:54:22
◼
►
like Billy Beane's like 51like it's like
[TS]
00:54:25
◼
►
he's a guy who like play baseball like
[TS]
00:54:27
◼
►
when I when I was a kid
[TS]
00:54:29
◼
►
yeah but he's only a few years older
[TS]
00:54:31
◼
►
than me I mean Michael Stipe is not that
[TS]
00:54:32
◼
►
much older than me that's right he seems
[TS]
00:54:34
◼
►
like a generation older than me but he's
[TS]
00:54:36
◼
►
actually not right and that is
[TS]
00:54:38
◼
►
disturbing to me and with michael stipe
[TS]
00:54:40
◼
►
I can handle it because whatever when I
[TS]
00:54:43
◼
►
was when I was 15 he was already 22 or
[TS]
00:54:47
◼
►
something and like that did seem that
[TS]
00:54:50
◼
►
did seem like a generational difference
[TS]
00:54:52
◼
►
but I don't think I knew that anthony
[TS]
00:54:56
◼
►
michael hall and molly ringwald were
[TS]
00:54:59
◼
►
just six months older than me or
[TS]
00:55:00
◼
►
something i didn't get my head is easy
[TS]
00:55:02
◼
►
younger to you
[TS]
00:55:03
◼
►
no no no they seemed again like they
[TS]
00:55:06
◼
►
were in the movies i was it i thought
[TS]
00:55:08
◼
►
that they were older people playing
[TS]
00:55:11
◼
►
teenagers I thought it was the classic
[TS]
00:55:13
◼
►
90210 problem right one girl with the
[TS]
00:55:15
◼
►
glasses here 60 yeah right and and you
[TS]
00:55:19
◼
►
know 25 27 year olds that are playing
[TS]
00:55:21
◼
►
seventeen-year-olds but the you know the
[TS]
00:55:23
◼
►
knowledge that those two those kids
[TS]
00:55:26
◼
►
playing teenage kids were actually
[TS]
00:55:29
◼
►
teenage kids his ideals right it's retro
[TS]
00:55:32
◼
►
actively depressing
[TS]
00:55:33
◼
►
yeah I don't know why to learn that at
[TS]
00:55:35
◼
►
44 years old is causing me to to to kind
[TS]
00:55:39
◼
►
of be a GOG today but but but I've spent
[TS]
00:55:46
◼
►
spent all afternoon kind of like
[TS]
00:55:47
◼
►
thinking about Anthony Michael Hall I
[TS]
00:55:51
◼
►
don't know I i think that was me for a
[TS]
00:55:53
◼
►
while was he like really like beefy
[TS]
00:55:55
◼
►
didn't get a like like games
[TS]
00:55:57
◼
►
yes bc i think he was I think I think
[TS]
00:55:59
◼
►
somebody was advising him as a young
[TS]
00:56:03
◼
►
don't don't be the nerd don't be
[TS]
00:56:05
◼
►
typecast as the nerd
[TS]
00:56:06
◼
►
yeah so you got it you got it you know
[TS]
00:56:08
◼
►
you gotta get into the gym and be a
[TS]
00:56:10
◼
►
serious actor and get it's not
[TS]
00:56:12
◼
►
flattering take some intense roles i
[TS]
00:56:14
◼
►
don't think you'd recognize him now if
[TS]
00:56:16
◼
►
you google Anthony Michael Hall right
[TS]
00:56:17
◼
►
now and look at his face now your it's
[TS]
00:56:19
◼
►
you're going to be like oooo he looks
[TS]
00:56:21
◼
►
like a guy at my child's pre-k he looks
[TS]
00:56:24
◼
►
like just somebody's dad he doesn't look
[TS]
00:56:26
◼
►
like anthony michael hall anymore but
[TS]
00:56:28
◼
►
now you look at Jackie Earle Haley I'm
[TS]
00:56:30
◼
►
you probably have not had a chance to
[TS]
00:56:31
◼
►
look at the materials essential but in
[TS]
00:56:33
◼
►
the in the movie version of watchmen
[TS]
00:56:35
◼
►
rorschach is played by Jackie Earle
[TS]
00:56:37
◼
►
Haley who you'll remember from Bad News
[TS]
00:56:39
◼
►
Bears and breaking always sure the bad
[TS]
00:56:42
◼
►
kid the city needs and great yes he's
[TS]
00:56:45
◼
►
played he's played Freddy Krueger in one
[TS]
00:56:47
◼
►
of the nightmare movies he's in shutter
[TS]
00:56:50
◼
►
island he has a great small but great
[TS]
00:56:52
◼
►
rolling shutter island
[TS]
00:56:53
◼
►
he's one of those guys he's like he's
[TS]
00:56:54
◼
►
off is all with all due respect mr.
[TS]
00:56:57
◼
►
Earle Haley like you don't fucked up
[TS]
00:56:59
◼
►
looking he's he's always been super
[TS]
00:57:00
◼
►
weird looking but like I sigh so
[TS]
00:57:03
◼
►
treasure that like and not you know what
[TS]
00:57:04
◼
►
now I gotta find out how old he is
[TS]
00:57:05
◼
►
I do this now you know what they do I
[TS]
00:57:07
◼
►
look for how tall people are so that's
[TS]
00:57:08
◼
►
all yeah I don't think he's very tall
[TS]
00:57:10
◼
►
I search for how tall people are isn't
[TS]
00:57:12
◼
►
that like that's an old person thing to
[TS]
00:57:13
◼
►
do isn't it did how I like your new
[TS]
00:57:16
◼
►
boyfriend he's told how is like scarlett
[TS]
00:57:19
◼
►
johansson seems like she's a little gal
[TS]
00:57:22
◼
►
she's she seems let me just look here
[TS]
00:57:25
◼
►
she's all look at that she's now 1053
[TS]
00:57:29
◼
►
gala gala plays agent hills a little
[TS]
00:57:31
◼
►
more statuesque did the bad news bears
[TS]
00:57:35
◼
►
have the effect on you that it had on me
[TS]
00:57:38
◼
►
probably which is to say that there were
[TS]
00:57:42
◼
►
there were things happening in that
[TS]
00:57:43
◼
►
movie that were just a little bit
[TS]
00:57:47
◼
►
out of my grasp and they made me afraid
[TS]
00:57:53
◼
►
that movie made me afraid and also yearn
[TS]
00:57:56
◼
►
for things i didn't i didn't know what i
[TS]
00:58:00
◼
►
was doing all of you know what it is
[TS]
00:58:02
◼
►
inevitable and yes it's the hallmark of
[TS]
00:58:05
◼
►
like the late seventies my gosh I'm
[TS]
00:58:08
◼
►
gonna fucking rabbit hole here it's a
[TS]
00:58:10
◼
►
hallmark of the late seventies young
[TS]
00:58:12
◼
►
person's movie whether that's breaking
[TS]
00:58:14
◼
►
away whatever me uh the first movie I
[TS]
00:58:16
◼
►
ever saw Diane laying in a little
[TS]
00:58:18
◼
►
romance with mr. Laurence Olivier I had
[TS]
00:58:21
◼
►
the hugest crush because about these
[TS]
00:58:23
◼
►
kids who meet in Paris and fall in love
[TS]
00:58:25
◼
►
and like 12 or 13 and i saw it was like
[TS]
00:58:28
◼
►
10 or 11 so it's like you ever had that
[TS]
00:58:30
◼
►
you're just filled with like easy kids
[TS]
00:58:32
◼
►
at camp like you watch meatballs I'm
[TS]
00:58:34
◼
►
like oh man I would love to meet a girl
[TS]
00:58:36
◼
►
in shorts
[TS]
00:58:37
◼
►
yeah well yes absolutely the interest
[TS]
00:58:39
◼
►
but like so seductive Tatum O'Neal was
[TS]
00:58:43
◼
►
that she I'm just realizing that there
[TS]
00:58:48
◼
►
was a remake of bad news bears with some
[TS]
00:58:53
◼
►
other people and yeah that's not what
[TS]
00:58:56
◼
►
we're talking about but it we're talking
[TS]
00:58:58
◼
►
about Walter Matthau Ricky take his
[TS]
00:59:00
◼
►
fucking drinking beer because you're
[TS]
00:59:02
◼
►
interfering the most rigorous but but
[TS]
00:59:04
◼
►
1000 neal had this worldliness that I
[TS]
00:59:08
◼
►
knew I knew already in nineteen whatever
[TS]
00:59:13
◼
►
70 like what the hell year was that that
[TS]
00:59:17
◼
►
was a 77 his paper moon was like 73 she
[TS]
00:59:22
◼
►
smokes in that and she's like 10 ok 76
[TS]
00:59:25
◼
►
so Tatum O'Neal said your mother i sent
[TS]
00:59:28
◼
►
you a link to some Jackie Earle Haley
[TS]
00:59:29
◼
►
girls are checking out but like I knew
[TS]
00:59:32
◼
►
in 1976 so I was eight in 76 and I knew
[TS]
00:59:36
◼
►
that Tatum O'Neal in the bad news bears
[TS]
00:59:39
◼
►
was not a virgin or maybe was still one
[TS]
00:59:47
◼
►
but had been to third base and mental
[TS]
00:59:48
◼
►
model for virginity when you were eight
[TS]
00:59:52
◼
►
I was I'm so I was so worried you know
[TS]
00:59:59
◼
►
that shit crossed
[TS]
00:59:59
◼
►
that shit crossed
[TS]
01:00:00
◼
►
some kind of she should cross the line
[TS]
01:00:02
◼
►
and she had people she was like maybe
[TS]
01:00:07
◼
►
maybe she's somebody touched her boobs
[TS]
01:00:11
◼
►
and she was okay with it she wanted it
[TS]
01:00:16
◼
►
to happen even and this is back when we
[TS]
01:00:18
◼
►
both still worried about people being
[TS]
01:00:20
◼
►
damaged goods right you what you worry
[TS]
01:00:22
◼
►
about them a little bit
[TS]
01:00:23
◼
►
well and and also like I had like I had
[TS]
01:00:27
◼
►
engaged in a little bit of like you show
[TS]
01:00:30
◼
►
me yours I'll show you mine and at one
[TS]
01:00:34
◼
►
point out on the compost pile was in the
[TS]
01:00:39
◼
►
process of doing a little you show me
[TS]
01:00:44
◼
►
yours I'll show you mine with a couple
[TS]
01:00:47
◼
►
of neighborhood girls when my mom came
[TS]
01:00:54
◼
►
around the corner with a wheelbarrow
[TS]
01:00:56
◼
►
full of compost of all the places and
[TS]
01:01:04
◼
►
she said what are you kids doing get out
[TS]
01:01:06
◼
►
of there
[TS]
01:01:07
◼
►
this is why you hate farming it up and
[TS]
01:01:10
◼
►
where everybody scattered oh and my mom
[TS]
01:01:13
◼
►
wasn't mean about it she wasn't it
[TS]
01:01:15
◼
►
wasn't you know she just that was from
[TS]
01:01:17
◼
►
take a lot John I mean just just just
[TS]
01:01:19
◼
►
her being there that those two worlds
[TS]
01:01:21
◼
►
should not collide like oh I was covered
[TS]
01:01:23
◼
►
in shame
[TS]
01:01:23
◼
►
I was covered in shame and I did not
[TS]
01:01:25
◼
►
know how you know and the thing about
[TS]
01:01:29
◼
►
Tatum O'Neal and the and the kid with
[TS]
01:01:33
◼
►
the dirt bike
[TS]
01:01:34
◼
►
what's his name Jackie Earle Haley
[TS]
01:01:35
◼
►
Jackie Earle Haley the thing about them
[TS]
01:01:38
◼
►
is that they hadn't they clearly had no
[TS]
01:01:41
◼
►
parental supervision or very little and
[TS]
01:01:45
◼
►
I was worried that in order i think what
[TS]
01:01:48
◼
►
it was I was worried that in order to to
[TS]
01:01:51
◼
►
learn about sex and cross this is the
[TS]
01:01:55
◼
►
Rubicon to be on the other side where
[TS]
01:01:59
◼
►
that where where people were touching
[TS]
01:02:01
◼
►
each other i was going to have to
[TS]
01:02:04
◼
►
sacrifice my relationship with my mom
[TS]
01:02:07
◼
►
you know what I mean like in the movies
[TS]
01:02:10
◼
►
all the all the kids that were fast when
[TS]
01:02:13
◼
►
you went to their house when the movie
[TS]
01:02:15
◼
►
went to their house their mom was
[TS]
01:02:16
◼
►
smoking cigarettes and was drunk in
[TS]
01:02:18
◼
►
front of the TV or like you know a
[TS]
01:02:21
◼
►
working mom single mom who's like always
[TS]
01:02:24
◼
►
out selling real estate or whatever
[TS]
01:02:26
◼
►
yeah but-but-but always liked the
[TS]
01:02:28
◼
►
message in the movie was always that mom
[TS]
01:02:30
◼
►
was self-involved or mean it was very
[TS]
01:02:32
◼
►
seldom that she was a working mom who
[TS]
01:02:35
◼
►
was harry reid and her kids were bad she
[TS]
01:02:39
◼
►
was always a working mom who was like
[TS]
01:02:40
◼
►
who was having an affair with her boss
[TS]
01:02:43
◼
►
or like you know she was a she was a bad
[TS]
01:02:46
◼
►
mom and so that's how these kids who had
[TS]
01:02:49
◼
►
a who have hearts of gold but they were
[TS]
01:02:51
◼
►
smoking cigarettes behind the school and
[TS]
01:02:53
◼
►
they were they were feeling each other
[TS]
01:02:55
◼
►
up and I didn't want to I didn't want to
[TS]
01:03:00
◼
►
have to because you know my mom already
[TS]
01:03:01
◼
►
worked a lot and I didn't want to have
[TS]
01:03:05
◼
►
to lose the good relationship that we
[TS]
01:03:08
◼
►
had with the little time that we had
[TS]
01:03:11
◼
►
together in order to learn to be like a
[TS]
01:03:17
◼
►
fast kid who liked head who had put his
[TS]
01:03:21
◼
►
hand up a girl shirt and so I think in
[TS]
01:03:23
◼
►
my mind somewhere i drew this
[TS]
01:03:25
◼
►
i drew this line like I needed to be
[TS]
01:03:28
◼
►
good and in order to be it was a little
[TS]
01:03:31
◼
►
bit black-and-white in order to be good
[TS]
01:03:33
◼
►
i needed to not wear it wasn't that I
[TS]
01:03:36
◼
►
needed to but then I was never going to
[TS]
01:03:40
◼
►
the kid with the motorbike right and
[TS]
01:03:42
◼
►
that's a that's a you know I could sit
[TS]
01:03:46
◼
►
if if I could set my eight-year-old self
[TS]
01:03:48
◼
►
down and talk to about this i would be
[TS]
01:03:50
◼
►
arrested immediately for Pat for talking
[TS]
01:03:53
◼
►
about sex with an eight-year-old because
[TS]
01:03:55
◼
►
apparently that's illegal now let's not
[TS]
01:03:57
◼
►
talk about time travel but who
[TS]
01:03:59
◼
►
haha thats that back then it wasn't
[TS]
01:04:03
◼
►
illegal back then you could have a kid
[TS]
01:04:05
◼
►
go get a beer for you can make this time
[TS]
01:04:07
◼
►
at the time now it's a oh boy that's a
[TS]
01:04:10
◼
►
real my field was going to be frightened
[TS]
01:04:12
◼
►
and I stopped but but it is i mean like
[TS]
01:04:15
◼
►
i felt the same way my mom was real
[TS]
01:04:18
◼
►
protective of me you know i think she's
[TS]
01:04:20
◼
►
you know she had a lot of loss in her
[TS]
01:04:22
◼
►
life and did not want to have me be lost
[TS]
01:04:24
◼
►
to but like that made me more reluctant
[TS]
01:04:27
◼
►
to like a until you know my mid-teen
[TS]
01:04:31
◼
►
years to become a Hellion you know what
[TS]
01:04:34
◼
►
I mean there's part of me that thinks
[TS]
01:04:35
◼
►
like it's a good idea to like burning
[TS]
01:04:37
◼
►
out of your system when your Tatum or
[TS]
01:04:38
◼
►
Jackie aged like not but like in an
[TS]
01:04:41
◼
►
environment that's safe like it should
[TS]
01:04:42
◼
►
be some kind of like you know mall petri
[TS]
01:04:45
◼
►
dish way to feel people up like he
[TS]
01:04:47
◼
►
shouldn't have to like sneak out of the
[TS]
01:04:48
◼
►
house when you're 17 and like you know
[TS]
01:04:50
◼
►
go somewhere super foreign you don't
[TS]
01:04:53
◼
►
mean it like that Italians having wine
[TS]
01:04:54
◼
►
at dinner like it makes it takes away
[TS]
01:04:56
◼
►
the stigma although the tragedy now is
[TS]
01:04:59
◼
►
that whatever that was that I was seeing
[TS]
01:05:02
◼
►
in Tatum O'Neal's eyes
[TS]
01:05:04
◼
►
I mean what we know now about her
[TS]
01:05:08
◼
►
relationship with her father ryan o'neal
[TS]
01:05:09
◼
►
the alcoholic like their leader
[TS]
01:05:14
◼
►
yeah terrible terrible but if there
[TS]
01:05:16
◼
►
wasn't a fair beater
[TS]
01:05:18
◼
►
what is the Faribault I was a hate it
[TS]
01:05:20
◼
►
wasn't he
[TS]
01:05:21
◼
►
unkind to Farrah Fawcett oh I think he
[TS]
01:05:25
◼
►
was unkind everybody at the key I think
[TS]
01:05:27
◼
►
he is legitimately abusive
[TS]
01:05:30
◼
►
well she says here in her I'm not
[TS]
01:05:31
◼
►
reading for Wikipedia in her
[TS]
01:05:33
◼
►
autobiography O'Neill alleged that she
[TS]
01:05:35
◼
►
was molested by her father's death
[TS]
01:05:37
◼
►
dealer when she was 12 she also alleges
[TS]
01:05:40
◼
►
physical and emotional abuse from her
[TS]
01:05:41
◼
►
father much of which he attributed to
[TS]
01:05:43
◼
►
drug use
[TS]
01:05:44
◼
►
she detailed her own heroin addiction
[TS]
01:05:48
◼
►
etc etc so whatever that worldliness
[TS]
01:05:51
◼
►
that was being captured on film when she
[TS]
01:05:53
◼
►
was 12 was in fact uh actual horror and
[TS]
01:05:58
◼
►
just say Mackenzie Phillips Mackenzie
[TS]
01:06:00
◼
►
Phillips another one and the lady was
[TS]
01:06:03
◼
►
very attracted to for her parent
[TS]
01:06:05
◼
►
worldliness who like you know had some
[TS]
01:06:06
◼
►
problems
[TS]
01:06:07
◼
►
yeah and maybe I was right as a kid to
[TS]
01:06:10
◼
►
see that to see her a lure and also
[TS]
01:06:15
◼
►
recognized that it was that it was a it
[TS]
01:06:19
◼
►
was a tragedy or there was forbidden
[TS]
01:06:21
◼
►
forbidden knowledge and that it's really
[TS]
01:06:25
◼
►
the exploitative adults in 1976 who used
[TS]
01:06:29
◼
►
that who use that brokenness in her eyes
[TS]
01:06:32
◼
►
to captivate a generation of us young
[TS]
01:06:37
◼
►
Wow boy I misbegotten youth might be
[TS]
01:06:44
◼
►
done with the whole program now wuz wuz
[TS]
01:06:46
◼
►
gud brokenness in her eyes
[TS]
01:06:48
◼
►
shit um now what about Jodie Foster
[TS]
01:06:52
◼
►
loved her you know
[TS]
01:06:54
◼
►
remember the movie where she was
[TS]
01:06:56
◼
►
remember that whole series of movies
[TS]
01:06:57
◼
►
that would David Niven hang on a minute
[TS]
01:07:00
◼
►
didn't she is one which is literally a
[TS]
01:07:02
◼
►
minute limit is 1000 Neil the
[TS]
01:07:04
◼
►
testimonial Jodie Foster in venues pairs
[TS]
01:07:06
◼
►
was Tatum O'Neal and bad news bears
[TS]
01:07:09
◼
►
history fostering the TV version is that
[TS]
01:07:10
◼
►
wasn't thinking of I don't know what was
[TS]
01:07:12
◼
►
their TV version Jodie Foster was in a
[TS]
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movie with David Niven where she was an
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American girl who it turned out this is
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01:07:21
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the great
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oh my god this this plotline big the
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very existence of this plotline ruined
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me as a child the knowledge that this
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type of thing was possible she was a
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like a ruffian an American Street
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ruffian little girl who it turns out is
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the heiress to some British you know
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sure her last surviving relative is the
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the Duchess of Cornwall or whatever and
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she flies over to England is living in a
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castle with David Niven and it's one of
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those culture clash things or she's like
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what you don't know how to play baseball
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smacking her gum and and monocle
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shatters yeah but uh but I said you know
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I saw that movie at at the exact wrong
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age that the totally impression elaj
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where I was like wait a minute are you
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two are you telling me that all i have
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to do is just be the all that's going to
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happen is somebody's gonna come knock on
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the door and be like hello
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we've come for the boy he's putting his
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last surviving son of the Duke of
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Cornwall what the Duke of bo was just a
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imagine how your life would be different
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if you had David Niven for mentor I'd be
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such an asshole
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[Music]
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