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Roderick on the Line

Ep. 124: "The Legend of Skeeter"

 

00:00:00   this episode of Roderick on the line is [TS]

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00:00:23   hello hey John [TS]

00:00:27   hi Merlin how's it going man [TS]

00:00:31   oh I'm self-conscious [TS]

00:00:35   why are you self-conscious how God no [TS]

00:00:37   one cares but I've got a different [TS]

00:00:38   microphone and it's making me [TS]

00:00:39   self-conscious it sounds good [TS]

00:00:41   you notice a difference yeah it's [TS]

00:00:43   clearer i think it makes me sound old [TS]

00:00:45   you think it's a it's a it's adds a few [TS]

00:00:49   years to your voice and I'm worried that [TS]

00:00:51   it's accurate as a few pounds now I'm [TS]

00:00:54   worried that this is actually what I [TS]

00:00:55   sound like [TS]

00:00:56   oh alright I just haven't smoked in a [TS]

00:00:58   really long time but I sound a little [TS]

00:00:59   bit like I've got some some filterless [TS]

00:01:01   camels in my throat [TS]

00:01:02   yeah you've got a little Joan Rivers [TS]

00:01:04   yeah on I try to talk as much like to [TS]

00:01:06   save my instrument you know you that you [TS]

00:01:09   thought the old microphone kind of [TS]

00:01:11   concealed that a little bit [TS]

00:01:13   hmm maybe I had before this is really [TS]

00:01:16   super interesting stuff like as inside [TS]

00:01:18   baseball as they say I the only one is a [TS]

00:01:21   workhorse and the the road podcaster you [TS]

00:01:24   know he gets like the yeah right [TS]

00:01:26   plug-and-play yeah it's like the sm57 of [TS]

00:01:28   podcast Mike's that doesn't make any [TS]

00:01:30   sense that's like saying the tube videos [TS]

00:01:32   but it but this one I gotta be careful [TS]

00:01:35   cause of my closest i think it's not [TS]

00:01:37   just one thing plosives closes a thing [TS]

00:01:40   how did you how did you learn to use a [TS]

00:01:42   mic mm uh the hard way for sure [TS]

00:01:46   yeah you know you can tell a singer that [TS]

00:01:50   doesn't know how to use microphone and [TS]

00:01:52   you can really tell a singer that does [TS]

00:01:54   know how to use a microphone and [TS]

00:01:56   sometimes you gotta go i'll bet you know [TS]

00:01:58   or a gal will be a singer for four years [TS]

00:02:01   and never really figure out Mike [TS]

00:02:03   technique [TS]

00:02:04   uh-huh [TS]

00:02:05   but because i was a guitar player right [TS]

00:02:08   i had to you know I didn't have I don't [TS]

00:02:10   have the option of like a lot of Mike [TS]

00:02:13   shenanigans in the anus one of those [TS]

00:02:15   things where at least while you're still [TS]

00:02:17   just getting proficiency at all the [TS]

00:02:20   different pieces there's so many I you [TS]

00:02:22   probably never got this but I remember [TS]

00:02:23   feeling like I had so many different [TS]

00:02:24   things to do it once and I had to like [TS]

00:02:27   remember you only play it twice this [TS]

00:02:29   part you gotta play the guitar you gotta [TS]

00:02:32   make sure to turn your volume down this [TS]

00:02:33   part you know the paddles don't get me [TS]

00:02:35   started on the pedals lot of pedals a [TS]

00:02:37   lot of pedal work [TS]

00:02:38   yeah and then on top of all that you [TS]

00:02:41   have to remind yourself if you're the [TS]

00:02:43   singer 20 right also inhabit the emotion [TS]

00:02:47   of the song and present it to the [TS]

00:02:49   audience in a compelling way maybe I dlr [TS]

00:02:54   out there you got really bringing in [TS]

00:02:55   bringing motion to the people you know [TS]

00:02:57   and once you start doing that you forget [TS]

00:02:59   all you forgot to do the volume you [TS]

00:03:02   forgot to do the pedal you forgot to [TS]

00:03:04   even which court was the right cord it's [TS]

00:03:07   a lot of that's a that's a real juggling [TS]

00:03:09   act [TS]

00:03:10   hi welcome back to my talk up but i [TS]

00:03:13   think it's picking up the streetcar [TS]

00:03:14   extra well this is next to ya know and [TS]

00:03:16   so what kind of it would be if you don't [TS]

00:03:18   mind saying what kind of Michael's nose [TS]

00:03:19   I would be happy to say ah before i was [TS]

00:03:22   using the red podcaster which all [TS]

00:03:24   obviously still keep around because you [TS]

00:03:25   use kind of any proof then I dr. Rhodes [TS]

00:03:28   good for podcasting it says it right in [TS]

00:03:29   the name yet you know what it's true and [TS]

00:03:31   it's got one of those funny sweetie [TS]

00:03:32   shows so you know it must be good food [TS]

00:03:34   someone on the internet has a nice [TS]

00:03:38   person IRA carry Blanco sent me he works [TS]

00:03:40   at a place called Samson it's a samson [TS]

00:03:42   c01u pro oh nice I think they could have [TS]

00:03:46   got a better name for it but that c01 [TS]

00:03:48   know obviously the put for the tech nerd [TS]

00:03:50   engineer types that by microphones [TS]

00:03:52   that's that's just like Colin at the [TS]

00:03:54   birth of the rose-petal fact it could be [TS]

00:03:58   that could also be like the name of an [TS]

00:03:59   android phone now [TS]

00:04:00   m 0 android phone and write some anyway [TS]

00:04:04   it's nice what do you use these are [TS]

00:04:06   these a snowball what he is no no you [TS]

00:04:10   got one of the shirt and Jesse just [TS]

00:04:12   throwing looking ones like your printer [TS]

00:04:14   get rid of Mike told use a [TS]

00:04:17   podcasting Mike your professional god oh [TS]

00:04:22   my god exactly my salmon cut that out if [TS]

00:04:24   I'm really bad that i use an sm7 the [TS]

00:04:28   great the greatest of all microphone [TS]

00:04:30   just want a big poofy thing at two [TS]

00:04:31   different covers i think i have one of [TS]

00:04:33   those [TS]

00:04:33   it's got a poofy thing if you have one [TS]

00:04:35   let me let me [TS]

00:04:37   I mean I don't want to get in the way of [TS]

00:04:38   your Samson but listen the thing has [TS]

00:04:41   everything about me and microphones is [TS]

00:04:44   I've been to a lot of studios I've done [TS]

00:04:47   a lot of tracking and every time but the [TS]

00:04:51   producer or the engineer brings out all [TS]

00:04:54   when it's time to do vocals bring out if [TS]

00:04:55   we talked about this before I don't care [TS]

00:04:57   brings out all the microphones and sets [TS]

00:05:01   up a lot like them all out on a table [TS]

00:05:04   and he's like you know this is a this is [TS]

00:05:07   a twenty-five-thousand-dollar sony a [TS]

00:05:10   tube mic and this is a you know this is [TS]

00:05:13   our are you 47 that we got from from you [TS]

00:05:18   know the original pink floyd and you [TS]

00:05:20   know everybody's so proud of their like [TS]

00:05:22   really high definition beautiful [TS]

00:05:24   microphones and I and I I try not to be [TS]

00:05:29   i try not to be the the singer that's [TS]

00:05:33   like well none of those are going to [TS]

00:05:34   work so i submit to a few hours of [TS]

00:05:39   testing these microphones where they set [TS]

00:05:42   it up and they put it through their best [TS]

00:05:43   compressor and I sing and they track it [TS]

00:05:47   and then we go in and we compare all the [TS]

00:05:50   tracks and it's like well that's you [TS]

00:05:53   know that Mike sounds great on everybody [TS]

00:05:55   but for some reason it just doesn't [TS]

00:05:57   sound very good right here and they [TS]

00:05:58   eliminate that and then it's like well [TS]

00:06:00   this next one it kind of doesn't sound [TS]

00:06:02   very good either and they just start [TS]

00:06:04   eliminating all the microphones until [TS]

00:06:07   i'm back at the sm7 wow the shure sm7b [TS]

00:06:11   it's happened [TS]

00:06:13   so many times it happened 15 times and [TS]

00:06:16   so I go into the student I'm like you [TS]

00:06:18   know what is it step typically I just [TS]

00:06:20   using sm7 into an 1176 with all the [TS]

00:06:24   buttons pushed in and the engineer the [TS]

00:06:28   producers like well how sure but you [TS]

00:06:31   haven't tried my amazing sure no pun [TS]

00:06:33   intended you haven't tried my amazing [TS]

00:06:35   you know $80,000 microphone that i got [TS]

00:06:38   from the east german government and we [TS]

00:06:40   plug it in and we test it and then we [TS]

00:06:42   end up back at the sm7 that's strange [TS]

00:06:45   so it's a microphone that is I guess [TS]

00:06:47   made for me and I so I have come to [TS]

00:06:49   think of it as the only good microphone [TS]

00:06:51   it's helped a lot of people no question [TS]

00:06:53   yeah but uh but other people you know [TS]

00:06:55   and the thing is when i'm recording [TS]

00:06:57   other singers the sm7 into an 1176 [TS]

00:07:01   doesn't work necessarily for them they [TS]

00:07:04   that they sound amazing on these [TS]

00:07:05   beautiful microphones [TS]

00:07:07   I think it's so strange how the [TS]

00:07:08   different setups can make such a [TS]

00:07:10   difference is all the famous I guess [TS]

00:07:12   examples with guitars but like I'm [TS]

00:07:14   always amazed like i used to play a [TS]

00:07:15   Telecaster and I was aware of the [TS]

00:07:18   limitations and very specific sound of a [TS]

00:07:20   telecaster i'm amazed people with fairly [TS]

00:07:23   stock telecasters can get so many [TS]

00:07:25   different sounds I don't just sound like [TS]

00:07:27   Don rich or something they they can make [TS]

00:07:29   your Alex chillin or whatever they can [TS]

00:07:30   really make it sound so different and i [TS]

00:07:32   never found that easy to do the [TS]

00:07:34   Telecaster is one of those rare events [TS]

00:07:37   in human history where the guy that [TS]

00:07:41   invented the thing got it perfectly [TS]

00:07:45   right the first try right the Telecaster [TS]

00:07:49   is the first essentially the first [TS]

00:07:51   electric guitar for the songs models may [TS]

00:07:54   be portable you can take off the neck [TS]

00:07:56   and put in your trunk wasn't the [TS]

00:07:57   original value proposition [TS]

00:07:58   yeah it's just a slab of wood and and [TS]

00:08:01   you could unscrew the neck and and yet [TS]

00:08:05   it is still as valid a guitar and I mean [TS]

00:08:10   there have been seven thousand different [TS]

00:08:12   kinds of guitar since then or maybe [TS]

00:08:13   seventy thousand but the Telecaster is [TS]

00:08:16   still like just as valid guitar as any [TS]

00:08:20   other and in in a lot of ways better you [TS]

00:08:23   know more indestructible more versatile [TS]

00:08:26   it's astonishing if you can think of you [TS]

00:08:27   can think of any other technology where [TS]

00:08:29   the first one the first iteration of the [TS]

00:08:33   thing continues to be the industry [TS]

00:08:35   standard throughout the whole life of [TS]

00:08:38   the of the thing i mean i guess like [TS]

00:08:40   stratovarius yeah i mean the [TS]

00:08:44   conventional wisdom at least with the [TS]

00:08:45   computer maths is that it takes two or [TS]

00:08:48   three tries to get something to be the [TS]

00:08:50   version that we really remember like [TS]

00:08:52   right we love the first iphone because [TS]

00:08:54   it was amazing but it's not [TS]

00:08:55   boy if you look at it compared to you [TS]

00:08:57   know an iphone4 it's it's such an [TS]

00:09:01   evolution forward that I get what you're [TS]

00:09:03   saying that's pretty crazy that at that [TS]

00:09:04   time you could have something with that [TS]

00:09:06   many revolutions and knowing what we [TS]

00:09:09   know about what made that sound good you [TS]

00:09:10   still can't make it sound that much [TS]

00:09:11   better [TS]

00:09:12   yeah it's already crazy I guess I mean [TS]

00:09:14   there are probably a couple of nerds [TS]

00:09:16   listening who are like what about the [TS]

00:09:17   rickenbacker frying pan guitar and what [TS]

00:09:19   about that you know and there were [TS]

00:09:21   hollow body electric with microphones [TS]

00:09:23   glued to the outside of them or whatever [TS]

00:09:26   I mean there were prior right whatever [TS]

00:09:28   that means and how many but what you're [TS]

00:09:30   saying though is how many things that [TS]

00:09:32   were made 60 years ago [TS]

00:09:34   can you take and plug into a standard [TS]

00:09:37   interface for its market today and have [TS]

00:09:40   it still sound better than a lot of the [TS]

00:09:42   stuff that's made today [TS]

00:09:43   that's not astonishing yeah it's [TS]

00:09:45   incredible to think that they think that [TS]

00:09:47   they didn't make that telecaster to be [TS]

00:09:49   they didn't make it to be premium it was [TS]

00:09:53   just a pic took a bandsaw to a piece of [TS]

00:09:56   wood and they I mean but not just it's [TS]

00:09:58   not just the usefulness of event think [TS]

00:10:00   of the shape of the Telecaster who I [TS]

00:10:02   mean you look at it and it's still a [TS]

00:10:04   beautiful thing like it is still a [TS]

00:10:06   gorgeous [TS]

00:10:07   they just leo fender just drew a shape [TS]

00:10:10   was like how well will you want to reach [TS]

00:10:13   up high on the neck so I guess we'll [TS]

00:10:14   like cut it out on that side and then [TS]

00:10:17   it's ok you can come here and pick up [TS]

00:10:19   there it's gotten pretty in my mind [TS]

00:10:22   because I've seen lots of my favorite [TS]

00:10:23   guitar players using it but it's not [TS]

00:10:25   just on it's not like looking like a [TS]

00:10:28   gradual something we go that's like a [TS]

00:10:30   work of art right but in fact it is the [TS]

00:10:33   ultimate gorgeous [TS]

00:10:34   I mean I the Telecaster was the first [TS]

00:10:36   guitar I coveted [TS]

00:10:38   really because the pete townsend know [TS]

00:10:40   because of Chrissie Hynde oh I saw those [TS]

00:10:43   original Chrissie Hynde music videos for [TS]

00:10:47   the for that first pretenders record and [TS]

00:10:49   that was right upright one you know you [TS]

00:10:52   can see the clash playing them too and [TS]

00:10:55   was just like what is that incredible [TS]

00:10:57   cool guitar Chrissie Hynde players and I [TS]

00:11:00   wanted one immediately [TS]

00:11:02   um and I went down to the guitar store [TS]

00:11:05   and they were like yeah it's nine [TS]

00:11:06   hundred dollars ranks like nine hundred [TS]

00:11:08   dollars you can buy a goodbye dodge dart [TS]

00:11:11   for that I don't even know what a dodge [TS]

00:11:13   dart was but I need a new you can get [TS]

00:11:15   another classic car I saw swinger I saw [TS]

00:11:17   dodge dart swinger you remember the [TS]

00:11:19   swinger and I think the lady version of [TS]

00:11:20   the dart had little daisy for the night [TS]

00:11:23   you hold your tongue sir i love you know [TS]

00:11:25   i love the swinger was a sporty little [TS]

00:11:27   car where was not a lady car want to put [TS]

00:11:29   a daisy on it there was you could I mean [TS]

00:11:32   I think you might have seen somebody who [TS]

00:11:34   put one of those bathtub daisies [TS]

00:11:36   probably cuz it's the inner sound y'all [TS]

00:11:38   let's stick with a sticker on the side i [TS]

00:11:41   don't think the swinger necessarily all [TS]

00:11:42   came with I think he had swing my friend [TS]

00:11:45   Sam got one and he in and we're in high [TS]

00:11:47   school so at that point it was 20 years [TS]

00:11:49   old [TS]

00:11:50   mm and you know it was one of those [TS]

00:11:52   things it was a little bit like having [TS]

00:11:53   like my VW bus were like you could [TS]

00:11:55   definitely kill it but then you could [TS]

00:11:57   also resuscitate it with almost alarming [TS]

00:11:59   ease first plant six the greatest motor [TS]

00:12:02   ever made that right slant 6 i'm telling [TS]

00:12:06   you if they still made this land six [TS]

00:12:08   with uh we wouldn't have all these [TS]

00:12:10   problems can get it all be different [TS]

00:12:12   that we would have only from with the [TS]

00:12:13   youth of America if that if we just said [TS]

00:12:15   we're making that the Dodge slant six [TS]

00:12:18   motor co I remember my mom had a long [TS]

00:12:21   time long time had a pontiac catalina [TS]

00:12:23   and just remember every time you open up [TS]

00:12:25   the hood and it looked like many of the [TS]

00:12:27   parts have been removed [TS]

00:12:29   there was like so much space like you [TS]

00:12:30   open up our rvw that we've got now which [TS]

00:12:33   is you know a new car you open it up you [TS]

00:12:35   look inside and it's what I imagine like [TS]

00:12:37   an iphone looks like there's no [TS]

00:12:38   tolerances for anything anywhere it's [TS]

00:12:40   all or nothing serviceable know it's [TS]

00:12:42   just it's just covered with a giant [TS]

00:12:44   plastic carapace it just looks like a [TS]

00:12:47   like a robot cockroach made it home [TS]

00:12:50   inside of a magic book but that's really [TS]

00:12:54   unpleasant it's terrible and that's what [TS]

00:12:57   those cars sound like to have a slant [TS]

00:12:59   six you know if there was room in there [TS]

00:13:02   to spread out a picnic blanket inside [TS]

00:13:04   the engine compartment you know and you [TS]

00:13:06   could you could work on it with it with [TS]

00:13:07   the with the with the standard set of [TS]

00:13:09   tools he didn't need a special of what [TS]

00:13:12   was called the the cloverleaf French [TS]

00:13:13   what's called what is it i'll need to [TS]

00:13:15   change a tire [TS]

00:13:16   oh right the star startled all I think [TS]

00:13:19   that's a killer band name star bolt [TS]

00:13:21   starboard is a phantom be good w [TS]

00:13:22   shoegaze band star bolt to take it you [TS]

00:13:26   got the music done i love the star bolt [TS]

00:13:28   it gets gets very evocative of a lot of [TS]

00:13:31   things star bolt it is and if you put [TS]

00:13:34   addy in it and spelled like humboldt [TS]

00:13:36   tolerable attachment s dar es garbled [TS]

00:13:41   horrible ass ' dar abouts carbon county [TS]

00:13:45   oh now it's a jam band then it got [TS]

00:13:48   terrible people [TS]

00:13:50   boot up this episode of rotting on the [TS]

00:13:55   line is sponsored by Squarespace the [TS]

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00:13:59   and easy to create your own professional [TS]

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00:14:16   look great on every device but let me [TS]

00:14:17   just say guys podcasting podcasting [TS]

00:14:19   people look it up when remind you that [TS]

00:14:21   Squarespace is the easiest way that I [TS]

00:14:22   know of to set up and host your own [TS]

00:14:24   podcast that is what you're doing right [TS]

00:14:26   now you're listening to Roderick online [TS]

00:14:28   which is hosted on Squarespace is the [TS]

00:14:29   only way we can never consider doing it [TS]

00:14:31   doing it for three years and it is [TS]

00:14:33   absolutely the best he just upload an [TS]

00:14:35   audio file attached it to a new post and [TS]

00:14:37   boom you are doing your own big-time [TS]

00:14:39   podcasting it is literally literally [TS]

00:14:41   that simple [TS]

00:14:42   I've been at the stuff for almost a [TS]

00:14:43   decade now believe it or not I honestly [TS]

00:14:45   can't imagine an easier way to do it [TS]

00:14:48   beauty part is Squarespace plans start [TS]

00:14:50   at only eight dollars american per month [TS]

00:14:52   that is so cheap it comes to the free [TS]

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00:14:55   which you should totally do and please [TS]

00:14:57   remember tell our friends at Squarespace [TS]

00:14:59   that you heard about them from your pals [TS]

00:15:01   here at work on the line [TS]

00:15:02   because listeners of this program get a [TS]

00:15:04   free trial plus ten percent of any [TS]

00:15:06   package they choose by using the very [TS]

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00:15:11   our thanks to our friends at Squarespace [TS]

00:15:13   they're so good to us [TS]

00:15:14   thank you for supporting Roderick online [TS]

00:15:16   we could not do it without you have car [TS]

00:15:18   trouble today is anything you can talk [TS]

00:15:19   about I had some car trouble i'm [TS]

00:15:21   probably recovered so quickly i would [TS]

00:15:23   still be crying on the side of the road [TS]

00:15:24   trying to find my phone to work [TS]

00:15:26   yeah I couldn't get the car to start it [TS]

00:15:27   was the battery was dead but more [TS]

00:15:29   importantly I'm very worried about my [TS]

00:15:31   next-door neighbor across the street [TS]

00:15:33   neighbor did the karaoke errs no no the [TS]

00:15:35   little of the lady with the fan the lady [TS]

00:15:38   with the bano dear I'm very worried [TS]

00:15:40   about four days ago five days ago all of [TS]

00:15:46   a sudden a bunch of people started being [TS]

00:15:47   around that house coming and going at [TS]

00:15:50   all hours people pilot out of the house [TS]

00:15:53   and getting in her car and driving away [TS]

00:15:56   five people in her car and then an hour [TS]

00:16:00   later coming back parking the car on the [TS]

00:16:04   on the grass this and then there was [TS]

00:16:07   some kind of what I hesitate to call a [TS]

00:16:12   party but definitely was an unsuccessful [TS]

00:16:15   Markie well definitely like a Saturday [TS]

00:16:18   night where there were a bunch of [TS]

00:16:20   sketchy people going in and out of the [TS]

00:16:22   house and it was probably a party to [TS]

00:16:27   them but to me it looked like a bad [TS]

00:16:31   scene [TS]

00:16:31   you know what I mean unless you million [TS]

00:16:33   evidence any of this time I have not [TS]

00:16:35   seen her in a week now but the thing is [TS]

00:16:37   that she often would go I would go a [TS]

00:16:39   week or two without seeing her because [TS]

00:16:42   she's well you know a little disabled [TS]

00:16:44   like she walks with a cane she's pretty [TS]

00:16:46   slow her boyfriend / fiancĂ© the guy [TS]

00:16:55   with the giant neck tattoo of a mosquito [TS]

00:16:58   with its mosquito proboscis buried in [TS]

00:17:04   his neck vein like a giant i'm at a [TS]

00:17:08   giant it's the size of Uncle received [TS]

00:17:10   from customers to get the size of a [TS]

00:17:11   Folgers coffee can [TS]

00:17:13   tattooed on his neck giant mosquito and [TS]

00:17:15   this is that this is the mosquito there [TS]

00:17:17   this is the tattoo that he chose to get [TS]

00:17:19   on his neck called Skeeter well you know [TS]

00:17:23   what that I should start calling him [TS]

00:17:25   Skeeter he has a long white beard that [TS]

00:17:27   he has put rubber bands in Allah gotta [TS]

00:17:31   practice [TS]

00:17:32   yeah yeah he looks exactly like captain [TS]

00:17:34   lou albano actually and he he's got like [TS]

00:17:36   he's got one of those alcoholic [TS]

00:17:37   cigarette voices that's just like i did [TS]

00:17:39   that and that is not good [TS]

00:17:43   yeah so he's out there kind of running [TS]

00:17:46   the show in and out some real cranky [TS]

00:17:50   people there's a guy that looks like [TS]

00:17:52   Wilt Chamberlain if Wilt Chamberlain was [TS]

00:17:54   a mega stoner and was completely bald on [TS]

00:17:58   top except had a kind of a fringe pretty [TS]

00:18:01   pretty pretty fluffy fringe around his [TS]

00:18:04   ears always wears a headband increasing [TS]

00:18:08   and he's six foot ten but then a bunch [TS]

00:18:12   of other like new skechers and they're [TS]

00:18:17   coming and going in and out of the house [TS]

00:18:19   late at night kind of trying to keep [TS]

00:18:21   quiet except for this one gal that [TS]

00:18:23   obviously like is the this younger gal [TS]

00:18:27   probably 40 year old gal that's like [TS]

00:18:28   kind of queen of the scene so she feels [TS]

00:18:30   like she can talk at any volume at any [TS]

00:18:33   time and everybody's going to approve of [TS]

00:18:36   it [TS]

00:18:36   uh-huh and so I'm I'm I'm surveying this [TS]

00:18:41   these goings-on and there's a lot of [TS]

00:18:45   whispered conversations in the driveway [TS]

00:18:48   and then somebody you know like does a [TS]

00:18:51   fast walk back into the house and [TS]

00:18:52   somebody else does a fast walk up the [TS]

00:18:54   street and I'm like what's going on over [TS]

00:18:57   there I don't like it I don't like it [TS]

00:18:59   but there's enough there's an there are [TS]

00:19:02   enough problems one I routinely don't [TS]

00:19:04   see my neighbor for weeks at a time so i [TS]

00:19:08   can't really say like well one day I [TS]

00:19:10   stopped seeing her and all these people [TS]

00:19:11   showed up so i had to call the community [TS]

00:19:13   service patrol and the second thing is [TS]

00:19:16   like there's enough sort of class and [TS]

00:19:19   cultural difference between me and them [TS]

00:19:21   that I am bridge I'm routinely looking [TS]

00:19:25   out the window going [TS]

00:19:26   those are scumbags I know scumbags and [TS]

00:19:30   yet maybe i'm being classist right now [TS]

00:19:36   maybe they aren't scumbags maybe they [TS]

00:19:39   are just people just good folk working [TS]

00:19:43   for cooler struggling to make ends meet [TS]

00:19:46   and then the other voice in my head is [TS]

00:19:48   like working folk don't walk like [TS]

00:19:50   crackheads the crackhead walk is a very [TS]

00:19:53   distinctive cockroach Ewok but then I'm [TS]

00:19:58   like you know I'm second-guessing it the [TS]

00:20:00   whole time because I'm like what you [TS]

00:20:01   know what if I called somebody and said [TS]

00:20:05   I'm worried about my across-the-street [TS]

00:20:06   neighbor and they said well what makes [TS]

00:20:08   you worry about them and I was like well [TS]

00:20:10   a bunch of skechers going in and out of [TS]

00:20:12   her house and I haven't seen her in a [TS]

00:20:13   week and they're just kind of like and [TS]

00:20:16   they're like well are they are they like [TS]

00:20:20   setting the house on fire they do they [TS]

00:20:22   appear to be stealing her stereo and [TS]

00:20:23   it's like mm not exactly i mean people [TS]

00:20:27   are moving things in and out of the [TS]

00:20:29   house but it's not a clearly didn't [TS]

00:20:32   there's no moving van pulled up and [TS]

00:20:34   filled up that so well anyway I said [TS]

00:20:37   it's happening in slow motion like that [TS]

00:20:38   I I know exactly what you mean we're [TS]

00:20:40   like I over the years I for any number [TS]

00:20:43   of reasons I've got much less [TS]

00:20:46   trigger-happy about saying oh that's [TS]

00:20:47   called the cops because I'm realizing as [TS]

00:20:49   i get older and see more stuff how [TS]

00:20:51   complicated that decision can be in the [TS]

00:20:54   moment and over the years after that you [TS]

00:20:56   know that suddenly you're the guy who [TS]

00:20:56   called the cops on people like you do [TS]

00:20:58   you want to be that guy and this is a [TS]

00:21:00   good reason but so on the one hand it [TS]

00:21:01   could be she's like not well she's [TS]

00:21:05   particularly not well she's bedridden [TS]

00:21:06   and a bunch of sketchy people are [TS]

00:21:08   helping out but you don't you're worried [TS]

00:21:11   about like an elder abuse type situation [TS]

00:21:12   where maybe she's sitting there with [TS]

00:21:14   sores or something [TS]

00:21:15   well or just I mean there are a lot of [TS]

00:21:18   things going through my head and and and [TS]

00:21:19   the other voice in my head is like well [TS]

00:21:21   what what if she is in trouble and [TS]

00:21:25   you've been sitting watching this go on [TS]

00:21:27   for four days like she doesn't have [TS]

00:21:29   anybody to count on calling and alerting [TS]

00:21:33   the authorities except you you're the [TS]

00:21:35   only person with eyes on this nobody [TS]

00:21:37   else in the neighborhood pays attention [TS]

00:21:38   to anything that [TS]

00:21:39   going on and you know what what are my [TS]

00:21:42   responsibilities to her and what's the [TS]

00:21:46   worst thing if you think they call it [TS]

00:21:47   yeah he's gotten these the welfare call [TS]

00:21:49   like uh what's the worst thing that [TS]

00:21:51   happened you think you go you going to [TS]

00:21:54   say how i am using a voice modulator now [TS]

00:21:57   maybe not do that but you would say you [TS]

00:22:00   haven't seen my neighbor for a few weeks [TS]

00:22:01   you might want to drive by and check it [TS]

00:22:03   out [TS]

00:22:03   yeah right i feel so anyway so last [TS]

00:22:08   night uh a lot of a bunch more like and [TS]

00:22:13   the thing is interrelated like they all [TS]

00:22:14   come running out jump in the car and [TS]

00:22:16   drive somewhere so yesterday there's [TS]

00:22:18   they're standing in the driveway and [TS]

00:22:20   that and the guy with the mask and [TS]

00:22:21   Skeeter is saying like we got ripped off [TS]

00:22:24   man we got ripped up we really got [TS]

00:22:26   ripped off this time and I was like okay [TS]

00:22:29   all right now I'm getting to the bottom [TS]

00:22:30   listening to this through my head and [TS]

00:22:32   multi-level marketing [TS]

00:22:34   ya know now i'm getting to the bottom of [TS]

00:22:36   this and he's and then he starts [TS]

00:22:39   whispering and he's like you know they [TS]

00:22:40   got all my weed and I'm like oh that's [TS]

00:22:43   not a reason to call the cops that they [TS]

00:22:45   stole his weed but who I mean it's like [TS]

00:22:48   people coming in and out of the house [TS]

00:22:49   stole his stuff but the the other drunk [TS]

00:22:52   guy that lives in the van in the front [TS]

00:22:53   yard is nowhere to be seen and he's [TS]

00:22:56   normally my biggest problem it's the [TS]

00:22:58   skeeters not the guy in the van Skeeter [TS]

00:23:00   lives in the house [TS]

00:23:01   no the dude in the van is totally [TS]

00:23:03   different guy huh [TS]

00:23:05   and the dude in the van is like and i [TS]

00:23:06   would expect him to be out doing his [TS]

00:23:08   usual act which is like fucking police [TS]

00:23:11   took my kids need me here and in the [TS]

00:23:15   middle of the road right isn't he yeah [TS]

00:23:16   yeah here at the mill road but he's gone [TS]

00:23:19   I don't see him at all his van still [TS]

00:23:20   there anyway so last night I'm driving [TS]

00:23:22   by I look in the in the driveway of the [TS]

00:23:24   house and there is a display unit of [TS]

00:23:29   fascia for Windows Phones fascia for you [TS]

00:23:35   know like like cases different cases for [TS]

00:23:39   android phones i guess and it's [TS]

00:23:42   obviously a store display that someone [TS]

00:23:45   has boosted what like somebody stole [TS]

00:23:49   like windows phone cases [TS]

00:23:52   one stole a display of like 25 different [TS]

00:23:55   colored windows phone cases perhaps [TS]

00:23:57   thinking that they were phones no and [TS]

00:24:01   that got them to the house realized they [TS]

00:24:03   weren't phones and just dropped it in [TS]

00:24:05   the driveway so I'm like okay that's not [TS]

00:24:09   that cool and then this morning I wake [TS]

00:24:14   up and there is a landscaping truck with [TS]

00:24:17   a wood chipper [TS]

00:24:18   oh no that drives up in front of the [TS]

00:24:21   house [TS]

00:24:22   there are now three cars parked in the [TS]

00:24:24   grass and in a you know just in a way [TS]

00:24:28   that I can't quite see through the hedge [TS]

00:24:30   something goes in the wood chipper [TS]

00:24:34   they spend a minute [TS]

00:24:38   grinding something up and then the wood [TS]

00:24:40   chipper truck drives away it's like some [TS]

00:24:44   kind of like emergency shredding service [TS]

00:24:46   448 handful an armful of items now where [TS]

00:24:50   I mean it but the thing is it's a it's a [TS]

00:24:52   proper landscaping truck it's not like [TS]

00:24:54   it you wouldn't have thrown up like an [TS]

00:24:56   old computer printer in there it was it [TS]

00:24:59   was it was a landscaping truck now I in [TS]

00:25:03   my whole life I have never seen one of [TS]

00:25:05   those pull up somewhere shred one thing [TS]

00:25:08   for one minute [TS]

00:25:10   no and then drive away for a million [TS]

00:25:13   reasons I mean usually took a tree or a [TS]

00:25:15   bunch of bushes something if you it's to [TS]

00:25:17   call that thing out you have 21 enough [TS]

00:25:19   stuff to get shredded that needs to be [TS]

00:25:20   shredded it's got to be something that [TS]

00:25:22   can be standing there supervising it's [TS]

00:25:24   not like you're throwing a dachshund or [TS]

00:25:26   something he's gonna you know he wants [TS]

00:25:28   to know there's something responsible [TS]

00:25:29   that you're throwing in there and he [TS]

00:25:30   drives away right away that sent [TS]

00:25:32   overnight at this point i'm looking [TS]

00:25:34   through them the hedges like a total you [TS]

00:25:38   know like a super paper and you know I [TS]

00:25:43   feel like mr. Furley and mrs. Kravitz [TS]

00:25:48   mrs. Kravitz what are you doing in then [TS]

00:25:51   and the truck truck drives away and then [TS]

00:25:54   you know again all the cars scatter in [TS]

00:25:56   every direction and I'm like okay what [TS]

00:25:58   if my neighbor because I had already [TS]

00:26:00   been thinking like what if she died [TS]

00:26:04   and she's and there and there's enough [TS]

00:26:09   shit in that house and enough like weird [TS]

00:26:11   stuff to figure out that she died and [TS]

00:26:16   her fiance is gradually stripping all [TS]

00:26:20   the copper pipes out of this place and [TS]

00:26:23   not calling no you're not calling it in [TS]

00:26:25   yet [TS]

00:26:26   right there in that there in that kind [TS]

00:26:28   of that by period where they can keep [TS]

00:26:30   people from knowing that she's gone [TS]

00:26:32   you still got a place to live and took [TS]

00:26:34   up copper pipe to repurpose right but [TS]

00:26:37   watching them there is a kind of calm a [TS]

00:26:43   sort of unperturbed bubble column to [TS]

00:26:45   them that maybe is because they're [TS]

00:26:48   crackheads and so they have a constant [TS]

00:26:50   level of tents anxiety but it never [TS]

00:26:53   fully never flares but that's not true [TS]

00:26:55   crackheads crackheads get go bonkers [TS]

00:26:57   when things are even a little bit out of [TS]

00:26:59   whack [TS]

00:27:00   so and i'm trying to think like it's [TS]

00:27:03   been 45 days it's been pretty hot days [TS]

00:27:05   in fact if somebody was dead in there it [TS]

00:27:07   would be intolerable to live there [TS]

00:27:10   maybe she I mean but if she went to [TS]

00:27:13   visit a relative she would have taken [TS]

00:27:14   her car [TS]

00:27:15   I mean I honestly and then the problem [TS]

00:27:18   is I'm a I'm enough of a busybody and [TS]

00:27:20   I'm a total top collar I call the cops [TS]

00:27:23   all the time but I don't know what my I [TS]

00:27:27   don't know what case i can make and the [TS]

00:27:30   end i am anna and there's a part of me [TS]

00:27:32   that is inhibited by a feeling that a [TS]

00:27:36   lot of the things I'm seeing that I'm [TS]

00:27:38   making judgments about fall into this [TS]

00:27:41   category of like well is that a [TS]

00:27:43   legitimate judgment you're making or are [TS]

00:27:45   you making some kind of weird are you [TS]

00:27:48   are you not a member of the culture and [TS]

00:27:51   so you are like casting aspersions yeah [TS]

00:27:55   oh I I think about that all the time now [TS]

00:27:58   and then when I was a kid i'm back to [TS]

00:28:01   guitars number one afternoon our [TS]

00:28:03   neighbor who was a semi-professional it [TS]

00:28:06   sparked player was like cool enough to [TS]

00:28:09   let you know couple teenagers hang out [TS]

00:28:10   with him and he would show us Jimi [TS]

00:28:11   Hendrix licks and stuff and you [TS]

00:28:13   when he let me borrow his tube screamer [TS]

00:28:14   pedal and in the time it took me to walk [TS]

00:28:18   from his yard to my yard we had a Jason [TS]

00:28:21   yards pretty much almost by the time I [TS]

00:28:23   walked into the house my mom called me [TS]

00:28:25   from the office because our nosy [TS]

00:28:27   next-door neighbor said that I was [TS]

00:28:29   bringing beer into the house so you know [TS]

00:28:32   the thing is you know you know how it is [TS]

00:28:33   to be a busy but you've been Gladys [TS]

00:28:34   Kravitz you're waiting for any reason to [TS]

00:28:36   call and she was waiting for some some [TS]

00:28:38   reason she had nothing better to do and [TS]

00:28:40   so she called called me and called my [TS]

00:28:41   mom because I had a guitar effect in my [TS]

00:28:43   hand right so you don't want to be that [TS]

00:28:46   guy you don't have anything you know [TS]

00:28:47   funny that you would mention Jimi [TS]

00:28:49   Hendrix because a big part of the [TS]

00:28:52   culture of a of my neighbor she's a [TS]

00:28:57   black woman in her sixties her husband [TS]

00:29:00   was about 15 years older than she was or [TS]

00:29:02   10 years older and he was a Seattle [TS]

00:29:05   musician who had played with jimi [TS]

00:29:06   hendrix and one of the calling cards of [TS]

00:29:11   all of these a Seattle african-american [TS]

00:29:15   dudes in their sixties if they have if [TS]

00:29:18   any of if you are a guy in his sixties [TS]

00:29:21   who's lived in seattle his whole life [TS]

00:29:22   and you ever smoked pod you have a story [TS]

00:29:26   about how you used to hang out with Jimi [TS]

00:29:27   Hendrix right so every one of these guys [TS]

00:29:30   the Wilt Chamberlain guy totally as [TS]

00:29:32   bored me to tears with his stall his [TS]

00:29:34   stories about how he and Jimmy were [TS]

00:29:36   seven you know because themes and Jimi [TS]

00:29:40   Hendrix famous famously introverted guy [TS]

00:29:42   who just sat in his house and play [TS]

00:29:44   guitar alone a lot but he knew every one [TS]

00:29:47   of these guys they all knew his mom and [TS]

00:29:49   they all you know it's like he didn't [TS]

00:29:50   know his mom Jimi Hendrix was and was [TS]

00:29:52   raised by his dad but every one of these [TS]

00:29:54   guys got 25 stories so the thing is that [TS]

00:29:57   in addition to like your normal sort of [TS]

00:29:59   cracky weird vibe going on over there [TS]

00:30:02   every once in a while a guy will walk in [TS]

00:30:05   with a fedora with a giant fucking a [TS]

00:30:07   feather sticking out of it or like not [TS]

00:30:11   just a feather but like a like a peacock [TS]

00:30:14   feather like a feather that's four feet [TS]

00:30:15   tall and you know where and we'll call [TS]

00:30:19   him mr. hat [TS]

00:30:20   yeah and then a guy comes in in a [TS]

00:30:22   scooter and a suit made of scarves [TS]

00:30:24   and it's just like I don't know what I'm [TS]

00:30:26   seeing [TS]

00:30:27   it's hard to know how to filter all of [TS]

00:30:28   that i'm a rock musician I've seen some [TS]

00:30:31   crazy shit but this house is just like [TS]

00:30:33   tonight so anyway and like Skeeter but I [TS]

00:30:38   never thought the day would come but [TS]

00:30:40   when i see skater it's a relief to me [TS]

00:30:42   because at least he is a guy that I know [TS]

00:30:45   is reliably up a broken-down unreliable [TS]

00:30:50   alcoholic at least I know is I got his [TS]

00:30:53   number right [TS]

00:30:54   the rest of the the rest of the scene i [TS]

00:30:57   got no I have no purchase on [TS]

00:31:00   uh-huh and everybody's super friendly [TS]

00:31:02   like you know even even the the guy that [TS]

00:31:05   looks a like eazy-e when I come out into [TS]

00:31:09   the street you know kind of like oh [TS]

00:31:10   hello good morning taking the garbage [TS]

00:31:12   out or whatever he wants to come over [TS]

00:31:13   and chat and like everybody's really [TS]

00:31:15   friendly so I don't feel like they have [TS]

00:31:18   the body of my neighbor wrapped in a [TS]

00:31:21   carpet somewhere but then the fucking [TS]

00:31:23   wood chipper truck that's a curveball in [TS]

00:31:27   if this if this were a young adult novel [TS]

00:31:31   from from my use [TS]

00:31:33   I think that the answer is clear [TS]

00:31:34   obviously if you're grown ass man she's [TS]

00:31:36   called police because it clearly [TS]

00:31:37   something's not right here but I'm just [TS]

00:31:39   saying I guess there's probably always [TS]

00:31:41   maybe probably somebody inside but maybe [TS]

00:31:45   you need to go and do some [TS]

00:31:46   reconnaissance just just to get your own [TS]

00:31:48   maybe you need to put your nose against [TS]

00:31:50   the window and see what's really going [TS]

00:31:51   on in there who see this is this is the [TS]

00:31:55   thing that be over the last four years [TS]

00:31:57   there have been a lot of people come in [TS]

00:32:01   and out of the house and it's always [TS]

00:32:02   turned out to be benign you know there [TS]

00:32:06   was a guy there with a moving truck for [TS]

00:32:08   a while and I was like this two years [TS]

00:32:10   ago turned out it was her dead husband's [TS]

00:32:14   long-lost cousin who found him in the [TS]

00:32:15   phone book and came and stayed for a [TS]

00:32:17   week and he was he was like a deeply [TS]

00:32:20   charming guy from from Atlanta and I was [TS]

00:32:24   like oh please don't go I want you to [TS]

00:32:26   stay here you are you didn't get [TS]

00:32:28   influenced he was a good guy but then he [TS]

00:32:30   was like I live in Atlanta [TS]

00:32:31   go home i actually said to him like [TS]

00:32:33   please don't go it was like it's been [TS]

00:32:35   this has been really great i love it up [TS]

00:32:37   here you know it's a place I could see [TS]

00:32:38   myself retiring to but I gotta go [TS]

00:32:41   and so but like going around the back of [TS]

00:32:44   that house or people on it that doesn't [TS]

00:32:47   feel safe [TS]

00:32:48   uh huh you know not to mention the fact [TS]

00:32:50   that like like cranky guy who lives in [TS]

00:32:54   the van I haven't seen him and he's the [TS]

00:32:57   one that scared it's just a really [TS]

00:32:59   immersive video game [TS]

00:33:00   this guy here you know I mean you might [TS]

00:33:03   spend everything might spend two weeks [TS]

00:33:05   before you ever even go on to the [TS]

00:33:06   property just figuring it out before you [TS]

00:33:08   ever level up and we're gonna go and get [TS]

00:33:10   past the guy in the van [TS]

00:33:12   it's the Legend of Zelda Legend of skied [TS]

00:33:15   I think the guy in the van like he's the [TS]

00:33:19   type of alcoholic that he will have a [TS]

00:33:21   long conversation with you and then the [TS]

00:33:22   next day and not remember ever having [TS]

00:33:24   met you and he hates he really hates the [TS]

00:33:27   cops because they took his kids you [TS]

00:33:30   could use that to your benefit if he's [TS]

00:33:32   that forgetful maybe you could you could [TS]

00:33:34   exert intimated the ICU don't make [TS]

00:33:37   yourself a target but if you could let [TS]

00:33:38   him know that like me maybe you have [TS]

00:33:39   some things that you could help him out [TS]

00:33:41   you know we get into that kind of [TS]

00:33:43   serious alcoholic delirium he might he [TS]

00:33:44   might really open up I'm directly across [TS]

00:33:47   the street though so it's like you know [TS]

00:33:49   i have i have one of those 3,000 [TS]

00:33:50   candlepower spotlights that basically is [TS]

00:33:54   a it's a spotlight from a battleship [TS]

00:33:55   that could illuminate a whole theater of [TS]

00:33:58   war and I keep it on reserve for those [TS]

00:34:01   moments when I really want to light up [TS]

00:34:03   the street [TS]

00:34:06   because it's a little bit of a shock and [TS]

00:34:08   awe yeah anyways if it sells get heavily [TS]

00:34:10   weaponize light [TS]

00:34:11   yeah it's just like boom and then [TS]

00:34:14   everybody scatters or or but the problem [TS]

00:34:16   with the like that is there's no [TS]

00:34:18   question where it's coming from [TS]

00:34:19   no no now how will you know when it's [TS]

00:34:23   gone too far [TS]

00:34:24   let me put it that way like you know if [TS]

00:34:25   you're the obviously you know your [TS]

00:34:26   thinker you think these things through [TS]

00:34:28   when do you think you would know I mean [TS]

00:34:30   apart from the obvious sort of people [TS]

00:34:31   shooting guns in the air kind of thing [TS]

00:34:33   when you think you would know that it [TS]

00:34:34   was time to do something I've been [TS]

00:34:36   waiting for there to be one of those [TS]

00:34:39   like a situations where a bunch of [TS]

00:34:42   people are coming out and loading up a [TS]

00:34:44   car with things that seem like they [TS]

00:34:46   belong in the house [TS]

00:34:47   turntables you know furniture quilts [TS]

00:34:53   quilts like somebody where where where [TS]

00:34:55   it's clear that they are that they are [TS]

00:34:58   dismantling the house right but i [TS]

00:35:00   haven't quite seen that yet huh for a [TS]

00:35:03   while the 30 or the woman in her forties [TS]

00:35:06   that was kinda queen of the scene she [TS]

00:35:08   sat on a on a plastic lawn chair in the [TS]

00:35:11   front yard for like three hours one time [TS]

00:35:15   between the hours of one and four in the [TS]

00:35:17   morning in a way that felt like she was [TS]

00:35:21   a she was like posted there like you go [TS]

00:35:25   sit on the chair out front [TS]

00:35:26   Wow and and watch watch the road and i'm [TS]

00:35:33   not even i'm not even like really [TS]

00:35:35   delving into the cars that are just [TS]

00:35:37   driving up pulling up out front of the [TS]

00:35:40   house stopping in front of the house [TS]

00:35:42   idling 45 minutes [TS]

00:35:44   no one gets in no one gets out why [TS]

00:35:46   windows are tinted and in the car drives [TS]

00:35:48   away again why I haven't even gotten [TS]

00:35:50   into telling that part of the story [TS]

00:35:53   it's very concerning I couldn't write [TS]

00:35:56   something with this many traps treats [TS]

00:35:58   with this many like faints [TS]

00:35:59   yeah there's so much stuff here it [TS]

00:36:01   sounds and you know there's probably one [TS]

00:36:02   thing that just explains it all [TS]

00:36:03   maybe it's a halfway house unlicensed [TS]

00:36:05   halfway house where else [TS]

00:36:08   it's definitely been an unlicensed [TS]

00:36:09   halfway house for a long time but things [TS]

00:36:11   are out of control now [TS]

00:36:14   yeah you can you know sometimes you can [TS]

00:36:15   feel like you can feel like when [TS]

00:36:18   somebody's influences waning here's a [TS]

00:36:20   funny thing when people get a little bit [TS]

00:36:21   older and you start to get something [TS]

00:36:22   like empty nest syndrome even if that's [TS]

00:36:24   you know a deceased spouse we love [TS]

00:36:26   having people around you know you want [TS]

00:36:28   people you want to hear people around [TS]

00:36:29   the house it's a great thing that I [TS]

00:36:30   think is another thing you see this a [TS]

00:36:32   lot in older women i think we're like [TS]

00:36:33   you know I really like being left alone [TS]

00:36:35   i like i like having I want to be secure [TS]

00:36:38   whatever but like you know I kind of [TS]

00:36:39   like the fact that I get to have my own [TS]

00:36:41   space and do it the way that I want and [TS]

00:36:43   so it sounds I mean is the stuff that's [TS]

00:36:45   going on now something the kind of thing [TS]

00:36:46   that she would welcome or enjoy three [TS]

00:36:48   years ago [TS]

00:36:49   mm no hard to tell you know she's a she [TS]

00:36:53   was always a pretty respectable lady in [TS]

00:36:56   the sense that she liked the whole [TS]

00:36:59   reason that Skeeter came into the house [TS]

00:37:00   was that she was uh that she [TS]

00:37:04   characterized herself at one point to me [TS]

00:37:06   as a drug and alcohol counselor and I [TS]

00:37:09   was like really I don't know about that [TS]

00:37:12   or or rather I took it in the same way [TS]

00:37:16   that when somebody says to me that they [TS]

00:37:18   are a sex educator serial entrepreneur [TS]

00:37:21   you know you're right but any time [TS]

00:37:23   somebody says that there are mental [TS]

00:37:25   health professional professional dancer [TS]

00:37:26   like me really are you really [TS]

00:37:29   and she was like that you know i'm a [TS]

00:37:32   sort of a drug and alcohol counselor I [TS]

00:37:33   was like everybody who ever went to a [TS]

00:37:36   12-step meetings mechanic says that [TS]

00:37:38   about themselves but it doesn't make it [TS]

00:37:41   true [TS]

00:37:42   and so Skeeter was there ostensibly [TS]

00:37:46   originally to get to eat em she was [TS]

00:37:50   walking him through the but I mean he's [TS]

00:37:52   out there right now just drinking sterno [TS]

00:37:54   and sprayed hairspray into a plastic bag [TS]

00:37:56   and like all kinds of that nobody sober [TS]

00:38:03   Nelson job I really causing me some [TS]

00:38:07   anxiety and then I got out there this [TS]

00:38:09   morning my car wouldn't start and I was [TS]

00:38:10   like okay what's that is somebody [TS]

00:38:13   sleeping in my car and they're leaving [TS]

00:38:14   the door cracked open so they can read a [TS]

00:38:17   the in-flight magazine or like how did [TS]

00:38:20   my car battery get run down and then I [TS]

00:38:25   went and checked the trunk to see if the [TS]

00:38:27   trunk was ajar because sometimes that [TS]

00:38:29   will run your car battery down huh [TS]

00:38:31   I realized that my guitar was in the [TS]

00:38:33   trunk and had been in there for 10 days [TS]

00:38:36   oh my god and I hadn't and I don't lock [TS]

00:38:39   my car because if you lock your car they [TS]

00:38:41   just come break your window pane for [TS]

00:38:43   window so i leave my car unlocked well [TS]

00:38:45   any number not in the town could have [TS]

00:38:48   come by and pop the trunk and there was [TS]

00:38:51   my guitar and I would have been I [TS]

00:38:53   wouldn't have noticed it was missing [TS]

00:38:54   until later on this week when I needed [TS]

00:38:58   it and I would have been like where's my [TS]

00:38:59   guitar I wonder and because i have three [TS]

00:39:02   houses there's always that possibility [TS]

00:39:03   that it somewhere else right [TS]

00:39:06   that's a harrowing feeling I'm like that [TS]

00:39:08   with my backpack and my backpack really [TS]

00:39:10   feels like my own port brain you know [TS]

00:39:12   it's got all the stuff in it that it's [TS]

00:39:13   not just immediately on my body and when [TS]

00:39:15   i leave it somewhere I'm it's it's like [TS]

00:39:17   leaving my kid I feel I want to get it [TS]

00:39:20   back i feel better but not that much [TS]

00:39:22   better [TS]

00:39:22   you know what I mean where you're like [TS]

00:39:24   cuz you're still vulnerable yeah i mean [TS]

00:39:26   like it's the stupid still with me you [TS]

00:39:27   know so it was in your backpack computer [TS]

00:39:30   well as various times your computer [TS]

00:39:32   could be an ipad it could just be like [TS]

00:39:34   you know everything that I i like to [TS]

00:39:36   keep a pretty light wallet and so i will [TS]

00:39:38   outboard some of that as we say in to [TS]

00:39:40   the backpack but I'm pretty dog about it [TS]

00:39:43   i mean i've i've really it'sit's I think [TS]

00:39:46   like the way a lot of people will be [TS]

00:39:47   with a person like I just don't forget [TS]

00:39:49   that but was it to you because you think [TS]

00:39:52   is your accessory light inside you think [TS]

00:39:54   it's me it's me fired let's get scared [TS]

00:39:56   through the pickup but it's been an [TS]

00:39:58   eventful week [TS]

00:39:59   yeah yeah and and at I could have I [TS]

00:40:04   don't know I don't know what I didn't [TS]

00:40:05   have the headlights on [TS]

00:40:06   I don't know how I ran down the battery [TS]

00:40:08   but it but it but it causes me great [TS]

00:40:10   concern nicely so much more confident [TS]

00:40:12   about everything I used to really [TS]

00:40:14   falsely I used to really feel like I [TS]

00:40:16   understand [TS]

00:40:16   a lot more than I do today and it gets [TS]

00:40:18   worse like every week i have more self [TS]

00:40:21   doubt about all the angles i'm probably [TS]

00:40:22   getting wrong about something and [TS]

00:40:24   sometimes it not sick cripples me but [TS]

00:40:26   like in a case like that i mean if you [TS]

00:40:28   were 10 years younger with you hesitate [TS]

00:40:30   for a minute like you just did Beauty [TS]

00:40:31   their do-it-yourself for you like call [TS]

00:40:33   the police right yeah I feel like 10 [TS]

00:40:36   years ago with it and that's the problem [TS]

00:40:38   i think what a major problem with [TS]

00:40:40   getting older is that I feel like the [TS]

00:40:42   same person and yet i'm not responding [TS]

00:40:45   to things the same way and I wonder if I [TS]

00:40:48   am the same person i remember a kid said [TS]

00:40:51   to me a guy I'd known in high school [TS]

00:40:53   when I was 24 or something [TS]

00:40:56   he came through town and stay with me [TS]

00:40:59   for a week and he said you know you're a [TS]

00:41:04   funny guy but you're not nearly as funny [TS]

00:41:06   as you were in high school [TS]

00:41:08   oh and I was like well that's shitty [TS]

00:41:11   thing to say and he was like no I mean [TS]

00:41:13   in high school like you were hilarious [TS]

00:41:15   but you were also cruel like you're a [TS]

00:41:21   lot better now because you were funny [TS]

00:41:25   but you were you were terrible and now [TS]

00:41:27   you're not terrible [TS]

00:41:29   not so terrible and from within [TS]

00:41:33   I had I mean I could kind of understand [TS]

00:41:36   what he was saying because there there [TS]

00:41:38   there was a moment where I made somebody [TS]

00:41:41   cry and I felt bad about it [TS]

00:41:44   I told you the story when i was running [TS]

00:41:46   for freshman class president in college [TS]

00:41:49   and we were all in the lunchroom and and [TS]

00:41:52   the principal or whatever the dean of [TS]

00:41:55   the college I guess there's not a [TS]

00:41:57   principal of the college dean of the [TS]

00:41:59   college was announcing the results and [TS]

00:42:02   and he announced that my opponent had [TS]

00:42:07   won the freshman class president and I [TS]

00:42:09   saw guide that I knew and a guy I'd [TS]

00:42:11   known from Anchorage who coincidentally [TS]

00:42:12   went to my college I saw him make about [TS]

00:42:17   the like pumped fist hand motion of like [TS]

00:42:21   yes [TS]

00:42:23   and I knew that it that it was not that [TS]

00:42:26   he was so excited for the other person [TS]

00:42:29   to win he was just excited that I lost [TS]

00:42:31   for X right right and I was like I I was [TS]

00:42:35   a little devastated by that this was a [TS]

00:42:37   guy who I mean we weren't friends but [TS]

00:42:39   we've gone to high school together [TS]

00:42:41   there should have been at least enough [TS]

00:42:44   loyalty just from that to carry us to [TS]

00:42:47   carry it through that he wouldn't wish [TS]

00:42:48   it upon me [TS]

00:42:49   that's way worse than winning the other [TS]

00:42:51   guy to win you have to want you to lose [TS]

00:42:53   ya and and I realized in that moment and [TS]

00:42:55   kind of you know like that that was one [TS]

00:42:58   of a series of moments where I was like [TS]

00:42:59   oh maybe I am maybe there are people who [TS]

00:43:03   genuinely don't like me because I am I [TS]

00:43:06   mean or bad but within my mind I still [TS]

00:43:11   feel like the same person and now I'm in [TS]

00:43:13   my forties I can't trust anything I [TS]

00:43:15   think right now I'm gonna trust you more [TS]

00:43:18   than I trust you to tell me [TS]

00:43:19   well you shouldn't you know I there's [TS]

00:43:22   this weird uh I don't know rubicon [TS]

00:43:24   between like all the stuff I used to [TS]

00:43:25   think I know really well and it's either [TS]

00:43:27   side over here where it's me like you [TS]

00:43:29   know swatching toward responsibility [TS]

00:43:31   even though i'm not really that good at [TS]

00:43:33   the responsibility stuff so when there's [TS]

00:43:35   something like you know loud music [TS]

00:43:37   that's keeping my kid with a cold awake [TS]

00:43:40   even I'll sit on that because i'm not [TS]

00:43:42   sure exactly how to handle that because [TS]

00:43:43   there's the 20-year old version of me [TS]

00:43:45   who doesn't want to be a dick and tell [TS]

00:43:46   somebody to turn down the music and the [TS]

00:43:48   other version because man if you're a [TS]

00:43:50   real dad you would just walk over there [TS]

00:43:51   treat that other treat that kid like a [TS]

00:43:53   kid that you respect and say hey to [TS]

00:43:55   favor could you turn it down my kids but [TS]

00:43:57   I still debate that I'll sit there and [TS]

00:43:58   and mold that over for a couple hours [TS]

00:44:00   and then so what I do might want to call [TS]

00:44:02   the police and have them be might be my [TS]

00:44:04   dad for me like I i don't know i think [TS]

00:44:07   what I knew less i had more confidence I [TS]

00:44:09   was less than you probably less [TS]

00:44:10   effective but it felt more effective [TS]

00:44:13   like I felt more like I was getting [TS]

00:44:14   stuff done [TS]

00:44:15   like I was getting stupid stuff done but [TS]

00:44:17   I really thought I knew what I was doing [TS]

00:44:18   I feel like we're not representing [TS]

00:44:20   megalomaniacs very well right now we [TS]

00:44:23   used to be better and I think we need to [TS]

00:44:25   really need to step back [TS]

00:44:27   well I'm a I'm a little embarrassed no [TS]

00:44:30   that's not true i'm a lot embarrassed [TS]

00:44:34   that I have sort somewhat been [TS]

00:44:37   concealing the fact that i got into a [TS]

00:44:39   fist fight the other day what I'll John [TS]

00:44:43   you haven't done that in a while have [TS]

00:44:45   you know it's been a long time no matter [TS]

00:44:47   how it was at bumbershoot my god and [TS]

00:44:50   there were a couple of drunks drunk 25 [TS]

00:44:54   year-olds who were i was waiting in line [TS]

00:44:58   in the drinking fountain and this you [TS]

00:45:03   know drunk kid with like shark eyes his [TS]

00:45:07   lean in next to the drinking fountain [TS]

00:45:09   and he's just kind of eyeball and [TS]

00:45:10   everybody there's a line of people [TS]

00:45:12   looking at the drinking fountain [TS]

00:45:13   he's just we even and staring and he's [TS]

00:45:17   making everybody uncomfortable couch and [TS]

00:45:21   I'm talking to a friend and somebody [TS]

00:45:25   asks me if I'm way there's two drinking [TS]

00:45:29   fountains a short one at all one and [TS]

00:45:31   somebody asked me if I'm the short one [TS]

00:45:34   is is available in and they asked me if [TS]

00:45:36   I'm gonna go on the short one I was like [TS]

00:45:37   no i'm waiting for the stand up tall one [TS]

00:45:40   and this guy leaned up against all goes [TS]

00:45:45   just say something sexist to my [TS]

00:45:48   girlfriend and I was like what and it [TS]

00:45:54   was hilarious [TS]

00:45:56   it was a hilarious a provocation right [TS]

00:46:02   he's not saying did you look at my [TS]

00:46:04   girlfriend he's saying did you say [TS]

00:46:06   something sexist to my girlfriend like [TS]

00:46:09   it's a total millennial a thought [TS]

00:46:13   process right it's a millennial bully [TS]

00:46:15   he's a millennial bully like he has [TS]

00:46:17   figured it out [TS]

00:46:18   he's still a bully asshole but he's been [TS]

00:46:20   raised in this culture where where you [TS]

00:46:24   have to couch you're bullying in this [TS]

00:46:28   first thought process of like I just [TS]

00:46:31   defended her Kizzy said something sexy [TS]

00:46:34   hit my head is spinning John that is so [TS]

00:46:36   many levels this yes well now he's got a [TS]

00:46:38   really righteous reason if not it's not [TS]

00:46:40   his Fedora wearing male ego he's a he's [TS]

00:46:43   worried [TS]

00:46:43   that's right and the band the thing is [TS]

00:46:45   that in any other time in history [TS]

00:46:47   God his righteous reason would have been [TS]

00:46:49   that he was defending her because you [TS]

00:46:51   were trying you were like a coming on [TS]

00:46:55   here yeah you and you're disrespecting [TS]

00:46:56   his male Authority yeah you were [TS]

00:46:58   disrespecting his property but now he's [TS]

00:47:01   a social justice warrior and he's [TS]

00:47:03   defending her because you said something [TS]

00:47:05   sexist to her and i was like I didn't [TS]

00:47:07   say anything to her or you [TS]

00:47:09   he's like she says something sexist [TS]

00:47:13   tonight girlfriend hunch and you know it [TS]

00:47:15   likes gets up off the wall squares and [TS]

00:47:18   shoulders up and I'm and I'm standing [TS]

00:47:22   there in a suit and I was like there are [TS]

00:47:27   25 25 different strategies at my [TS]

00:47:30   disposal to defuse this situation and [TS]

00:47:35   I'm choosing to use none of them well [TS]

00:47:37   and I was like you know what kid you too [TS]

00:47:41   drunk to be in public your hospital [TS]

00:47:44   you're gross and you need to get out of [TS]

00:47:46   here [TS]

00:47:47   this is a music festival people are [TS]

00:47:48   having a good time and your piece of [TS]

00:47:51   shit you need to go home and he was like [TS]

00:47:53   whoa you're booked in to talk to me [TS]

00:47:57   about little bit do you go home and you [TS]

00:48:00   know any steps to me and I'm like [TS]

00:48:02   seriously you're drunk you too drunk to [TS]

00:48:04   be out and you need to either go sit on [TS]

00:48:07   a bench until you sober up [TS]

00:48:08   we need to go home because you're a pain [TS]

00:48:10   in the ass inside know you some kind of [TS]

00:48:14   fucking fuck you man fucking 40-year old [TS]

00:48:17   and I was like I am 40 years old and I'm [TS]

00:48:21   telling you need to go home and his [TS]

00:48:23   friend is there and his friend jumps in [TS]

00:48:25   and is like he's just drunk man he's [TS]

00:48:27   just drunk and I was like yeah he's [TS]

00:48:29   drunk you're drunk you're too drunk go [TS]

00:48:32   home and then the girlfriend is like huh [TS]

00:48:35   stop it Steve town and I'm like all you [TS]

00:48:39   need to get out of here and he's you [TS]

00:48:46   know then he and then his friend is like [TS]

00:48:48   whoa who the fuck are you why don't you [TS]

00:48:50   get out here and then it's like two of [TS]

00:48:51   them right that the drunk guy and then [TS]

00:48:54   his drunk friend that was [TS]

00:48:55   trying to be the Peacekeeper and then at [TS]

00:48:58   a certain point the guys like you know [TS]

00:49:00   what fuck it man shake my hand shake my [TS]

00:49:02   god and I was like I'm not gonna shake [TS]

00:49:05   your hand did I got nothing to shake [TS]

00:49:06   your hand about you need to go home [TS]

00:49:09   that's all I'm telling you and then it's [TS]

00:49:12   like well he wouldn't i wouldn't shake [TS]

00:49:15   their hand right so then it's like you [TS]

00:49:16   fucking bitch man you a bitch you won't [TS]

00:49:18   shake my hand I'm like I'm a bitch i'm a [TS]

00:49:21   fourteen-year-old bit telling you to get [TS]

00:49:25   the and that now there's a crowd of [TS]

00:49:27   people like 40 real bitch I'm telling [TS]

00:49:30   you to go home [TS]

00:49:32   ma out of here go sit down on the grass [TS]

00:49:35   but don't stand here by the freaking [TS]

00:49:39   drinking fountain picking fights with [TS]

00:49:40   people and then he pushes me cause set [TS]

00:49:45   pushes me while calling me a bitch in [TS]

00:49:47   such a way that he kind of like spittle [TS]

00:49:49   lickspittle bitch like bitch which me [TS]

00:49:53   and I fucking punched him right in the [TS]

00:49:54   face and then I punched him again in the [TS]

00:49:57   face and then I put took him down to the [TS]

00:49:58   floor and then his friend punched me and [TS]

00:50:03   then I yeah I don't know I don't [TS]

00:50:06   remember uh but in the end it was so [TS]

00:50:14   then I was embarrassed that are you [TS]

00:50:16   wearing a suit from where you're 40 year [TS]

00:50:18   old bitch in a suit [TS]

00:50:19   I'm a four-year-old home-owning bitch [TS]

00:50:22   sooo John and um and then I'm standing [TS]

00:50:27   there and this kid is a mess and his [TS]

00:50:30   friend is like running and I popped a [TS]

00:50:35   button off my suit [TS]

00:50:37   and I'm embarrassed I'm like what the [TS]

00:50:38   fuck how did this happen how am i [TS]

00:50:40   standing here now in a huge crowd of [TS]

00:50:41   people and so I go so I turned around to [TS]

00:50:45   go and I'm just like I need to go splash [TS]

00:50:47   some water on my face I go into the [TS]

00:50:48   bathroom I look down at my finger is all [TS]

00:50:52   fucked up on now and I'm like not only [TS]

00:50:55   did I get into a fistfight but now i'm [TS]

00:50:58   fucked up my finger i do not even any [TS]

00:51:02   more have the karate skills to not hurt [TS]

00:51:06   myself it on this guy's head so I'm in [TS]

00:51:11   the bathroom and I'm like this is bad [TS]

00:51:12   this is bad this is embarrassing [TS]

00:51:15   I'm full-grown man there were a lot of [TS]

00:51:18   ways I could have dealt with that so I [TS]

00:51:21   sit in the bathroom for a little while [TS]

00:51:23   and I'm like I don't even want to come [TS]

00:51:24   out of the bathroom i'm so fucking [TS]

00:51:25   embarrassed but eventually come out of [TS]

00:51:28   the bathroom and my friend is waiting [TS]

00:51:29   there and he says we should leave by the [TS]

00:51:33   back stairs and I say why and he says [TS]

00:51:40   para bunch of cops and paramedics around [TS]

00:51:44   the corner and there's a there's like [TS]

00:51:50   blood all over so it was pretty bad [TS]

00:51:53   it was I mean I was mad yeah well I mean [TS]

00:51:57   I i do I wasn't there but and I don't [TS]

00:52:00   have the skills but you were I think in [TS]

00:52:03   a pretty defensive position I don't you [TS]

00:52:06   know you got what you had to do I can I [TS]

00:52:08   mean what you know the thing is that [TS]

00:52:09   that 99% of people i think would have [TS]

00:52:13   said that the actual thing to do in our [TS]

00:52:16   contemporary society would have been to [TS]

00:52:21   say hey guy [TS]

00:52:23   I didn't say anything to your girlfriend [TS]

00:52:24   it's cool or you know like you're right [TS]

00:52:28   to defend her up against people saying [TS]

00:52:30   sexist things to her or that weren't [TS]

00:52:32   actually set or the one then no one was [TS]

00:52:34   talking to you or you know or just like [TS]

00:52:37   avert your eyes and not say anything and [TS]

00:52:39   wait for him to take on the next person [TS]

00:52:42   that he encounters or let him sit by the [TS]

00:52:45   drinking fountain for 45 minutes and [TS]

00:52:46   scare everybody in the building [TS]

00:52:49   or whatever go get in a car or you know [TS]

00:52:52   whatever his plan was but in any case so [TS]

00:52:55   we we go out via the back stairs and my [TS]

00:52:59   friend says listen I don't want to [TS]

00:53:02   glorify that at all but the best moment [TS]

00:53:05   of it was two guys walking through you [TS]

00:53:08   know kind of skirting the devastation [TS]

00:53:10   and one of them says what the hell [TS]

00:53:13   happened to those two guys and the other [TS]

00:53:15   one goes i heard they got their asses [TS]

00:53:17   kicked by a forty-year-old that's awful [TS]

00:53:23   that's terrible it's terrible and so [TS]

00:53:25   then I had always seen you you've lost [TS]

00:53:27   weight you look at that he got hair you [TS]

00:53:30   cut your hair in a sensible way your [TS]

00:53:31   biggest rim you look kind of like Tom [TS]

00:53:33   Wolfe and your fucking 40-year old [TS]

00:53:35   business yeah but then I'm like I'm like [TS]

00:53:37   I'm you know I i lost a button off my [TS]

00:53:39   suit my friend is like they're mopping [TS]

00:53:41   his blood off the glowing people and [TS]

00:53:43   then I then I watched as they could [TS]

00:53:45   because they put him on a girl on your [TS]

00:53:46   own John eNOS and so I'm in I'm [TS]

00:53:49   embarrassed and I also feel bad and you [TS]

00:53:55   know and every minute of the day I have [TS]

00:53:58   a reminder of it because you're my [TS]

00:54:00   finger is in a fuckin split now [TS]

00:54:02   oh now which finger which hand my my my [TS]

00:54:06   first finger my pointer finger of my [TS]

00:54:07   right hand so it's not a it's it's I can [TS]

00:54:10   still play guitar with my second finger [TS]

00:54:12   but um like I have a gig this weekend [TS]

00:54:16   shit and also so I get home and I'm like [TS]

00:54:20   well you know I've broken my hands [TS]

00:54:23   before and you just go to the doctor and [TS]

00:54:26   they just they just tell you you know [TS]

00:54:29   they charged seven hundred dollars to [TS]

00:54:30   tell you we already know so i made a [TS]

00:54:33   splint out of a couple of chopsticks and [TS]

00:54:35   some band-aids and I wear that around [TS]

00:54:38   for a while and I was like well maybe [TS]

00:54:42   that's not the right maybe chopsticks [TS]

00:54:45   are two straight you don't want to have [TS]

00:54:47   your you want to make your fingers to [TS]

00:54:48   straight so I took the chopstick splint [TS]

00:54:52   off for a couple of days and I was just [TS]

00:54:54   like I'm just going to use it until it [TS]

00:54:55   gets better [TS]

00:54:57   and then I think I reinjured it in a way [TS]

00:55:01   that makes me think that maybe it's [TS]

00:55:02   broken [TS]

00:55:04   yeah and so now then i went to the drug [TS]

00:55:07   store and I bought a proper splint and [TS]

00:55:09   copper tape on it [TS]

00:55:12   ok as you said you're making circles you [TS]

00:55:14   can look closer and I'm connecting john [TS]

00:55:16   III don't you go sort of i think you [TS]

00:55:18   might wanna get that looked at the thing [TS]

00:55:20   is that what you what happens you go [TS]

00:55:22   look at the dr x-rays gonna tell you [TS]

00:55:24   things you already know yeah 700 hours [TS]

00:55:26   and you should have you should put a [TS]

00:55:27   splint on it and it's like I gotta split [TS]

00:55:29   on it now I should have had it on there [TS]

00:55:30   the whole time [TS]

00:55:31   God but so it hurts and I feel like I [TS]

00:55:35   did break it and it's been a week and it [TS]

00:55:41   doesn't feel like it's you know [TS]

00:55:42   therefore for the week that I was kind [TS]

00:55:44   of walking around in either my [TS]

00:55:45   chopsticks plant or my or just using it [TS]

00:55:48   I was like hurts enough awful lot and [TS]

00:55:52   it's pretty swollen but I feel like the [TS]

00:55:54   best thing to do is just ice it and use [TS]

00:55:59   it dawns a really small John yeah and a [TS]

00:56:03   and I guess and ultimately i'm most [TS]

00:56:05   embarrassed at the fact that I don't [TS]

00:56:07   even know how to like beat up a drunk [TS]

00:56:11   without breaking my own hands [TS]

00:56:13   give me a break he's uh I you are got [TS]

00:56:18   them on my heart would be in my throat [TS]

00:56:19   that situation uh I mean it was [TS]

00:56:23   upsetting i think it was upsetting to [TS]

00:56:25   everyone [TS]

00:56:26   um but it's a it's just one of those [TS]

00:56:30   situations where where as I replayed it [TS]

00:56:33   it was like I oh I'm such a i'm such a [TS]

00:56:39   paternalist you know like this kid [TS]

00:56:43   obviously didn't have a good dad and I [TS]

00:56:46   was going to be his bad dad for that [TS]

00:56:51   half an hour and i don't know i don't [TS]

00:56:53   who knows if you know like I got beat up [TS]

00:56:58   a couple of times when I was that age I [TS]

00:57:00   was never like sit by a drinking [TS]

00:57:01   fountain pick fights with people i mean [TS]

00:57:03   i got drunk beat up for legitimate [TS]

00:57:05   reasons that I was an asshole who needed [TS]

00:57:08   to be taken to the way [TS]

00:57:09   having a primary not to defend the [TS]

00:57:11   experience but it sounds like he was a [TS]

00:57:13   predator and maybe just too drunk to [TS]

00:57:15   know he was being a predator but that's [TS]

00:57:16   that's not a way to behave in public as [TS]

00:57:18   an adult [TS]

00:57:19   yeah yeah and you know and I could have [TS]

00:57:22   I could have gone and found a security [TS]

00:57:24   guard and then what you know like come [TS]

00:57:26   on what would have happened there [TS]

00:57:27   nothing maybe so [TS]

00:57:30   four-year-old bitch with the security [TS]

00:57:31   card yeah then I'd be like a [TS]

00:57:32   four-year-old bitch in a suit that went [TS]

00:57:33   and got his mom mrs. he wasn't it wasn't [TS]

00:57:36   exactly the name calling it was the the [TS]

00:57:37   pushing you and the like provoking you [TS]

00:57:40   that basically now two guys are gonna [TS]

00:57:42   fight you and your soup [TS]

00:57:44   yeah right i mean the the push was not [TS]

00:57:46   benign it was a it was like the it was [TS]

00:57:52   the provocation they started classic a [TS]

00:57:54   classic such a classic bully though you [TS]

00:57:56   know I'm because the really classic [TS]

00:57:57   bully is not somebody who you know it [TS]

00:58:00   succeeds referred you know 20 years at [TS]

00:58:02   it in the classic ability is is somebody [TS]

00:58:04   who's gotten away with it [TS]

00:58:05   yeah and get on with it enough and it [TS]

00:58:07   becomes their own like a kind of [TS]

00:58:11   malignant therapy for trying to deal [TS]

00:58:15   with power in their life and yeah that [TS]

00:58:17   and then they just beat up when they can [TS]

00:58:19   we write and condition when he made the [TS]

00:58:21   transition from did you say some things [TS]

00:58:23   access to my girlfriend to just shake my [TS]

00:58:26   hand and it'll be cool [TS]

00:58:28   what was missing in the interim was any [TS]

00:58:32   kind of apology right and if he had said [TS]

00:58:35   or his friend said hey I'm sorry I got [TS]

00:58:38   that wrong I apologize [TS]

00:58:41   let's just shake hands and be done with [TS]

00:58:43   it yeah like this is you know what this [TS]

00:58:44   is stupid [TS]

00:58:45   I'm so this let's just move on yeah okay [TS]

00:58:47   know that right no no no no no John I i [TS]

00:58:55   like this I well I don't like the San [TS]

00:58:56   detail but you know he had said if he [TS]

00:58:59   had made it but what he did was the [TS]

00:59:01   classic bully move which was kiss my [TS]

00:59:03   ring [TS]

00:59:04   yeah now he's like he's trying to get [TS]

00:59:06   out of it he realizes that he is that he [TS]

00:59:08   is out of his depth and they basically [TS]

00:59:10   you've now that he sees it as you've [TS]

00:59:12   successfully negotiated to wear a tough [TS]

00:59:14   guy doesn't have to beat you up and now [TS]

00:59:16   all you have to do is is admit that he [TS]

00:59:18   was right all along and shake his hand [TS]

00:59:19   like a gentleman [TS]

00:59:20   yeah right exactly and [TS]

00:59:22   the fact that i would shake his hand [TS]

00:59:24   then became the issue of course now too [TS]

00:59:27   but now it's about like you're not even [TS]

00:59:28   a normal gentlemen [TS]

00:59:29   yeah yeah look like and that that is the [TS]

00:59:32   that's the classic sort of bullying [TS]

00:59:34   redirect and people do that all the time [TS]

00:59:36   and some classic way to trick somebody [TS]

00:59:38   Indian sucker-punched well yeah yeah [TS]

00:59:41   right i know he loved signs and a hell [TS]

00:59:44   of signs of my daughter school when I [TS]

00:59:46   noticed the other day that i think is [TS]

00:59:47   pretty good was like it's very short [TS]

00:59:48   signs just said how to apologize for [TS]

00:59:50   something and there's three steps don't [TS]

00:59:52   you say well no I'm just saying what if [TS]

00:59:54   you're genuine apology goes like this [TS]

00:59:56   you say I'm sorry for what I did [TS]

00:59:59   number one [TS]

00:59:59   number one [TS]

01:00:00   42 it was my fault and number three what [TS]

01:00:03   can i do to make this better and i have [TS]

01:00:04   to tell you as signs go [TS]

01:00:06   I think that's a pretty good sign [TS]

01:00:07   because because nothing sucks like a bad [TS]

01:00:09   apology [TS]

01:00:10   you know the I'm sorry you're offended [TS]

01:00:11   kind of apology out the big city big [TS]

01:00:13   city [TS]

01:00:13   exactly but the button but in that case [TS]

01:00:16   you know that guy that was not about [TS]

01:00:18   that and the thing is you know this [TS]

01:00:19   you've been that guy in a sense you've [TS]

01:00:21   been the dumb drunk guy who was watching [TS]

01:00:24   himself from outside his body do [TS]

01:00:25   something stupid [TS]

01:00:26   somewhere in that guy's little pinhead [TS]

01:00:28   he probably saw what a dumbass he was [TS]

01:00:30   being but yeah I got ya i don't want to [TS]

01:00:32   try and defend it but i really doubt [TS]

01:00:34   that's the first time this has ever [TS]

01:00:35   happened [TS]

01:00:36   I doubt that he said Bumbershoot is [TS]

01:00:37   going to be my bully coming-out party I [TS]

01:00:38   bet he didn't shit like that for years [TS]

01:00:40   usually back down [TS]

01:00:42   he absolutely has an and the fact that [TS]

01:00:43   his girlfriend and his friend were so [TS]

01:00:46   ineffective in controlling him that is [TS]

01:00:49   stopped to eat [TS]

01:00:50   yea travis team and then has been his [TS]

01:00:53   buddy you know like decided he was going [TS]

01:00:56   to get on board the bullet train rather [TS]

01:00:58   than you know and i think i hope that [TS]

01:01:01   the lesson that they take away is that [TS]

01:01:03   40 year old guys have 20-plus more years [TS]

01:01:08   of kicking people's ask then they do you [TS]

01:01:11   know what I mean like like at least in [TS]

01:01:13   that situation I hope to take away was [TS]

01:01:16   there are a lot of people there are a [TS]

01:01:18   lot more people to watch out for them we [TS]

01:01:20   prior than we previously thought [TS]

01:01:22   well yeah yeah I wish you would I wish [TS]

01:01:24   you would be something even more humane [TS]

01:01:26   which is like wow that's a pretty I was [TS]

01:01:27   acting like a real shitty oh well no [TS]

01:01:29   because that you that you know that that [TS]

01:01:31   was that they will never go back and [TS]

01:01:33   reevaluate their own behavior probably [TS]

01:01:35   can't remember it but if they just think [TS]

01:01:37   to themselves oh there are more people [TS]

01:01:40   watching and and um and prepared to [TS]

01:01:46   intervene and capable of of stopping me [TS]

01:01:50   then I previously thought [TS]

01:01:52   right because they were so contemptuous [TS]

01:01:54   of the fact that I was older and they [TS]

01:01:57   were like 40 years old that you should [TS]

01:01:59   have seen the looks on their faces like [TS]

01:02:00   your fucking 40 dude what are you gonna [TS]

01:02:03   fucking do about what's it's probably [TS]

01:02:05   not so different than us going to punk [TS]

01:02:06   rock Sean going God look at that guy [TS]

01:02:08   you know what why is that guy here [TS]

01:02:10   doesn't he know that this isn't for him [TS]

01:02:12   well I know but you know there were [TS]

01:02:13   always those guys a punk rock shows who [TS]

01:02:15   are 40 years old that you sure I shifted [TS]

01:02:17   entangle with those guys with mosquitoes [TS]

01:02:20   tattooed on their next people better [TS]

01:02:22   scoot over here like no thank you [TS]

01:02:26   I young you were or how do i say you [TS]

01:02:30   have concerns for the consequences of [TS]

01:02:34   this [TS]

01:02:34   oh there was some suggestion well so I [TS]

01:02:37   got a tweet from somebody who was like [TS]

01:02:39   hi big fan really excited to meet you [TS]

01:02:42   and was about to say hi [TS]

01:02:44   I at the center house when you got into [TS]

01:02:49   a strange altercation with a drunk and I [TS]

01:02:50   decided to split and I was like I'm [TS]

01:02:54   really sorry that you had to witness [TS]

01:02:57   that a debacle and she said well you [TS]

01:03:01   know i'm a teacher and I realized that [TS]

01:03:04   this situation wasn't going to get any [TS]

01:03:06   better if there was a crowd of people so [TS]

01:03:08   i just got out of there right so i [TS]

01:03:10   imagine that she I'm hoping that she [TS]

01:03:13   split before she split even while it was [TS]

01:03:16   just sort of an ugly butt back and forth [TS]

01:03:20   before it turned into a a like a one way [TS]

01:03:22   back and forth but some but my friend [TS]

01:03:27   did say like I does it concern you that [TS]

01:03:29   that the 25 people could video tape and [TS]

01:03:32   put it on the internet and um in a way [TS]

01:03:39   it would just be it would just be [TS]

01:03:41   embarrassing in the same way that it [TS]

01:03:42   wasn't already embarrassing which is [TS]

01:03:44   just like what am i doing right but it [TS]

01:03:47   was not it was not unrighteous no no i [TS]

01:03:50   was i was thinking more of from a legal [TS]

01:03:53   standpoint [TS]

01:03:54   well that's the thing that's and that [TS]

01:03:57   this is the problem of a videotape right [TS]

01:03:59   yeah if somebody had turned on their [TS]

01:04:01   phone just in the last five seconds [TS]

01:04:05   who are they still would see him push me [TS]

01:04:08   and then me respond and that is sort of [TS]

01:04:11   like I beats me what the [TS]

01:04:13   the total breakdown of the rules is but [TS]

01:04:17   I feel like if somebody like pushes you [TS]

01:04:19   hard and spits in your face kind of that [TS]

01:04:22   you got you are entitled to punch them [TS]

01:04:24   in the nose [TS]

01:04:25   um but but the the problem of of any [TS]

01:04:29   kind of video is that you wouldn't have [TS]

01:04:31   got you wouldn't have the whole spectrum [TS]

01:04:33   of this guy's provocation right there [TS]

01:04:36   wasn't a film crew already watching him [TS]

01:04:39   via a shitty thug right so but again I [TS]

01:04:48   think about this stuff all the time I [TS]

01:04:49   still have a whole section a whole shelf [TS]

01:04:51   of books that I'm just saving for prison [TS]

01:04:53   I haha i am always waiting for the phone [TS]

01:04:58   to ring and it's somebody with a [TS]

01:04:59   subpoena God and and so you know and i [TS]

01:05:04   have i've got i've got i've considered [TS]

01:05:07   myself in and I think everybody has to [TS]

01:05:10   have done this at one point another [TS]

01:05:11   considered myself in an interview room [TS]

01:05:14   with two cops across the table from me [TS]

01:05:16   and they think I committed a crime that [TS]

01:05:18   I didn't because you hear about this all [TS]

01:05:21   the time yeah you get interview being [TS]

01:05:23   interviewed by a good cop bad cop and [TS]

01:05:25   somehow after 24 hours they big convince [TS]

01:05:28   you to don't need the only really need [TS]

01:05:29   to say it [TS]

01:05:30   the only need you to say a different one [TS]

01:05:31   time right that's the thing and and so [TS]

01:05:35   I've played that scenario in my mind all [TS]

01:05:37   the time because it's like they're [TS]

01:05:38   people on death row that just made the [TS]

01:05:40   wrong move in a room [TS]

01:05:43   and I've watched a lot of law and order [TS]

01:05:45   who [TS]

01:05:46   not recently now back in the day when [TS]

01:05:49   that was socially acceptable so I feel [TS]

01:05:53   like whatever legal consequences [TS]

01:05:55   well there wouldn't be any the legal [TS]

01:05:56   consequences would be that he would you [TS]

01:05:59   know also be culpable for fights [TS]

01:06:03   starting she's basically just start [TS]

01:06:05   listening to see if he has a podcast for [TS]

01:06:06   he talks about it right now and a lot of [TS]

01:06:09   people a podcast John that's the that's [TS]

01:06:12   one of the advantages of not being that [TS]

01:06:14   famous if I i mean if i were Eddie [TS]

01:06:18   Vetter my bodyguards would have just [TS]

01:06:21   beat the guy up but if you're like [TS]

01:06:25   somewhere in between there like who's [TS]

01:06:28   who is not as famous as any better and [TS]

01:06:30   more famous than me who led to [TS]

01:06:32   conceivably like Jack White is a perfect [TS]

01:06:35   example there's a guy should get into a [TS]

01:06:38   famous fistfight with a guy with ryan he [TS]

01:06:41   was just he was like producing the guys [TS]

01:06:43   record right yeah that guy put that [TS]

01:06:45   picture of himself all black and blue [TS]

01:06:47   from Jack White that picture was [TS]

01:06:49   everywhere for six months [TS]

01:06:51   I mean he used it to promote his record [TS]

01:06:53   the Von Bondies DePandi's of course and [TS]

01:06:58   you know and I was like boys jack white [TS]

01:07:00   beat me up and up at a party I sure [TS]

01:07:03   wouldn't put the picture of myself all [TS]

01:07:05   over the place but I guess if that's [TS]

01:07:06   what you need to promote your band which [TS]

01:07:09   asked for a rematch [TS]

01:07:10   um I don't know he it checked i did some [TS]

01:07:14   pretty pretty bad damage i think he's [TS]

01:07:15   pretty piece a pretty big guy but jack [TS]

01:07:17   white aura or who's the bald guy from [TS]

01:07:20   the smashing pumpkins ally Jimmy [TS]

01:07:23   Corrigan yeah Jimmy Corrigan the world's [TS]

01:07:25   smartest boy [TS]

01:07:25   yeah uh either one of those guys I could [TS]

01:07:28   see them getting into a bar fight or [TS]

01:07:30   into a fight at a festival with some [TS]

01:07:31   with a couple of drunks sure and I [TS]

01:07:36   imagined there'd be a lot more videotape [TS]

01:07:38   of it [TS]

01:07:39   yeah if Jack was boxing some kid I hope [TS]

01:07:42   your fingers okay I I you know I don't [TS]

01:07:44   give you medical advice but yeah he [TS]

01:07:45   might wanna get that looked at for [TS]

01:07:47   clothes too long [TS]

01:07:48   you're saying that I should go to a [TS]

01:07:49   doctor I'm saying it's probably too late [TS]

01:07:51   but but you know you need that for your [TS]

01:07:53   work you need that for writing you need [TS]

01:07:55   that for guitar [TS]

01:07:56   an american doctor you're saying I [TS]

01:07:58   should go see me like a licensed doctor [TS]

01:08:00   heat like the son I don't know it's a [TS]

01:08:02   good professional doctors gonna say [TS]

01:08:03   let's get that x-rayed I fill out these [TS]

01:08:05   forms of the broken finger and then he's [TS]

01:08:07   going to say up but it's been a week [TS]

01:08:09   already and it's already a flange take [TS]

01:08:13   these chopsticks [TS]

01:08:14   yeah you should you should use i'm going [TS]

01:08:18   to give you a prescription for some [TS]

01:08:20   unnecessary pain medicine that you won't [TS]

01:08:23   take that you won't take and that's [TS]

01:08:25   going to sit and be a be an attractive [TS]

01:08:27   nuisance to house burglars [TS]

01:08:31   yeah that's gonna attract Skeeter yeah [TS]

01:08:34   and then you're gonna and then you're I [TS]

01:08:36   want you to wear this seven hundred [TS]

01:08:38   dollar chopsticks any physical therapy [TS]

01:08:40   which enjoy that you go someplace with [TS]

01:08:43   old people and large rubber bands [TS]

01:08:46   I can do that myself you know my mom [TS]

01:08:47   broke her foot one time in the and she [TS]

01:08:50   walked like eight miles to the doctor [TS]

01:08:51   and the doctors like there's no way you [TS]

01:08:53   could walk here eight miles if you had a [TS]

01:08:55   broken foot that you punched him [TS]

01:09:01   [Music] [TS]