Roderick on the Line

00:00:00 ◼   ► hello no John I'm Merlin how is it going [TS]

00:00:10 ◼   ► oh it's a little bit tenuous hmm yeah [TS]

00:00:16 ◼   ► there's a little bit of tenuous pneus [TS]

00:00:18 ◼   ► because my rig l my podcasting rig I [TS]

00:00:23 ◼   ► think I'm getting it though I'm getting [TS]

00:00:25 ◼   ► the 10 yuasa tea out of it you sound you [TS]

00:00:28 ◼   ► sound tremendous oh hey thank you you do [TS]

00:00:32 ◼   ► with it that feels good when someone [TS]

00:00:34 ◼   ► says you sound tremendous well you sound [TS]

00:00:36 ◼   ► like you might be inside of like a [TS]

00:00:37 ◼   ► costly shag rug you're very well [TS]

00:00:40 ◼   ► buffeted you are you sound good [TS]

00:00:42 ◼   ► sometimes when you're at your venice [TS]

00:00:44 ◼   ► beach location it's a little echoey yeah [TS]

00:00:47 ◼   ► in this case it sounds like you're [TS]

00:00:48 ◼   ► inside of like a really expensive [TS]

00:00:49 ◼   ► cardboard box it sounds good yes yes [TS]

00:00:51 ◼   ► yeah are you doing something different [TS]

00:00:53 ◼   ► you know what every week is different [TS]

00:00:56 ◼   ► because because I feel like so much the [TS]

00:01:01 ◼   ► same and yet somehow different yeah you [TS]

00:01:03 ◼   ► know Here I am talking to my podcast pal [TS]

00:01:05 ◼   ► TM and um you know I feel like every [TS]

00:01:10 ◼   ► week we should we shut off a certain [TS]

00:01:15 ◼   ► amount of skin flakes and dander right [TS]

00:01:18 ◼   ► things inside of us die and are replaced [TS]

00:01:20 ◼   ► by other things Hakuna Matata stuff [TS]

00:01:24 ◼   ► cycles around goes in it comes out and [TS]

00:01:28 ◼   ► so why why should I be podcasting from [TS]

00:01:32 ◼   ► the same location same fashion every [TS]

00:01:34 ◼   ► week I'm barely the same person I was [TS]

00:01:38 ◼   ► two weeks ago yeah yeah you that you [TS]

00:01:41 ◼   ► were two weeks ago is like in your air [TS]

00:01:44 ◼   ► conditioning filter at this point [TS]

00:01:46 ◼   ► exactly fingernails grow fingernails get [TS]

00:01:49 ◼   ► bitten off they grow em to everything [TS]

00:01:52 ◼   ► turn turn turn that's right my eyelashes [TS]

00:01:55 ◼   ► go out into my mouth somehow and then I [TS]

00:01:59 ◼   ► you know depth and so I try to keep it [TS]

00:02:05 ◼   ► you know I could try to keep it fresh [TS]

00:02:07 ◼   ► mm-hmm I try to keep a new [TS]

00:02:10 ◼   ► yeah are you going with my uncle and [TS]

00:02:13 ◼   ► Aunty and bellaire oh sure sure parents [TS]

00:02:17 ◼   ► had gone on a vacation uh okay uh I [TS]

00:02:21 ◼   ► don't like to ask you no questions about [TS]

00:02:24 ◼   ► things um flash flash was kind of the [TS]

00:02:37 ◼   ► cousin Oliver of that show they brought [TS]

00:02:39 ◼   ► him in late to kind of Russian things up [TS]

00:02:41 ◼   ► he was the scrappydew and I don't want [TS]

00:02:45 ◼   ► to scrappy do you know how that he was [TS]

00:02:47 ◼   ► so cute i wanna scrappy-doo he was he [TS]

00:02:51 ◼   ► was better than most yeah he was better [TS]

00:02:54 ◼   ► than having some little kid with big big [TS]

00:02:56 ◼   ► glasses on my show robbie rist robbie [TS]

00:02:59 ◼   ► rist robbie i think his name is robbie [TS]

00:03:01 ◼   ► rist Oh without a w oh I was gonna say [TS]

00:03:05 ◼   ► robbie rist that is a good that's good [TS]

00:03:07 ◼   ► punk rock name it's a good punk rock [TS]

00:03:09 ◼   ► name it's a good thing to call somebody [TS]

00:03:11 ◼   ► that you get that you catch masturbating [TS]

00:03:13 ◼   ► oh look at him it's rob you know what [TS]

00:03:15 ◼   ► thank you all right well did Robbie [TS]

00:03:17 ◼   ► truth Robbie yes now what did would you [TS]

00:03:20 ◼   ► put it W in front of Robbie Robbie mwr [TS]

00:03:25 ◼   ► ist i think i just put a hat on a hat so [TS]

00:03:28 ◼   ► if you google robbie rist Oh see I think [TS]

00:03:30 ◼   ► he suffers from the same face hair [TS]

00:03:33 ◼   ► malady that I have let's see here Robbie [TS]

00:03:36 ◼   ► risk yeah see I think about the one that [TS]

00:03:38 ◼   ► came on too hot happy days Oh after [TS]

00:03:42 ◼   ► chachi what there was some there was [TS]

00:03:45 ◼   ► some kid that was it the songs adopt a [TS]

00:03:48 ◼   ► kid robbie rist without a w huh yeah uh [TS]

00:03:53 ◼   ► what what who was they who was the one [TS]

00:03:56 ◼   ► the kid with the with the glasses that [TS]

00:03:58 ◼   ► was incongruous given that yeah there he [TS]

00:04:01 ◼   ► is and he was on which is on memory [TS]

00:04:04 ◼   ► serves I believe his on the Brady Bunch [TS]

00:04:06 ◼   ► the Brady Bunch right and he's like a [TS]

00:04:09 ◼   ► little he looks exactly like John Denver [TS]

00:04:11 ◼   ► who was very popular on cuz that's a [TS]

00:04:13 ◼   ► really good point he had that that [TS]

00:04:15 ◼   ► ubiquitous 70s haircut which our hands [TS]

00:04:21 ◼   ► you had the the helmet you had the that [TS]

00:04:24 ◼   ► was named TWiki was it Twiggy [TS]

00:04:27 ◼   ► spinnerbait twiki and dr. Theophilus [TS]

00:04:32 ◼   ► that I remember the biddy biddy biddy oh [TS]

00:04:34 ◼   ► no I always call that the mom the [TS]

00:04:38 ◼   ► haircut that your mom gives you oh the [TS]

00:04:40 ◼   ► mom cut yes and there were lots of Mason [TS]

00:04:43 ◼   ► Reese I don't think he had that haircut [TS]

00:04:44 ◼   ► but okay so okay born 1964 52 years old [TS]

00:04:47 ◼   ► so you know the show you know you start [TS]

00:04:51 ◼   ► out in a certain place and then you go [TS]

00:04:52 ◼   ► to a different place and you know the [TS]

00:04:55 ◼   ► the show by the yeah you know it's like [TS]

00:04:57 ◼   ► gets like in raising arizona you know i [TS]

00:04:59 ◼   ► gotta get gotta get some new baby [TS]

00:05:01 ◼   ► because these aren't you know it's [TS]

00:05:02 ◼   ► huggable anymore you need somebody cute [TS]

00:05:04 ◼   ► so you add a robbie rist you add a you [TS]

00:05:08 ◼   ► add a little girl on the family yeah [TS]

00:05:11 ◼   ► yeah but i don't think you know they [TS]

00:05:13 ◼   ► I've actually here on the first page of [TS]

00:05:14 ◼   ► Google the cousin all of those their [TS]

00:05:17 ◼   ► cousin Oliver syndrome I guess they're [TS]

00:05:19 ◼   ► saying they're applying to robbie rist [TS]

00:05:20 ◼   ► always being I think he is the widely [TS]

00:05:23 ◼   ► regarded as the canonical example of the [TS]

00:05:26 ◼   ► scrappydew problem did did Mason Reese [TS]

00:05:28 ◼   ► was he d my bologna has a first name [TS]

00:05:30 ◼   ► it's ma y ER he was the Borg a smart kid [TS]

00:05:33 ◼   ► Oh Boris Boris board oh I love to eat it [TS]

00:05:37 ◼   ► every day soon you ask me while say oh [TS]

00:05:42 ◼   ► me series look at Google Mason Reese [TS]

00:05:44 ◼   ► well I just did already here he looks [TS]

00:05:47 ◼   ► like that easy easy if somebody gets [TS]

00:05:51 ◼   ► mistaken for Bruce Vilanch you better be [TS]

00:05:53 ◼   ► big goddamn careful you know it's sort [TS]

00:05:56 ◼   ► of the Reich mysteries minus Bruce [TS]

00:05:58 ◼   ► Vilanch equals you know it's the single [TS]

00:06:02 ◼   ► thing in the entire world that gets [TS]

00:06:04 ◼   ► under your skin and it's still killing [TS]

00:06:06 ◼   ► go learned yeah Oh rocky Allen rippy i [TS]

00:06:11 ◼   ► forgot about Rodney Allen rippy I always [TS]

00:06:13 ◼   ► mistake the girl that came on to all in [TS]

00:06:16 ◼   ► the family and then went into the [TS]

00:06:18 ◼   ► spin-off Archie's place yes Danielle I [TS]

00:06:22 ◼   ► always a mistake her for the girl in [TS]

00:06:25 ◼   ► goodbye girl good you know it's a movie [TS]

00:06:28 ◼   ► i still haven't seen oh come my god I [TS]

00:06:30 ◼   ► know I know you know I'm putting on the [TS]

00:06:31 ◼   ► list on go home and watch it right now [TS]

00:06:34 ◼   ► my husband Richard Dreyfuss won his [TS]

00:06:36 ◼   ► Academy Award you heard a Duke boys very [TS]

00:06:41 ◼   ► gates David Gates you don't hear from [TS]

00:06:43 ◼   ► hearing or hope all Benedict Bentley was [TS]

00:06:45 ◼   ► in that movie Quinn Cummings there you [TS]

00:06:47 ◼   ► go Quinn Cummings Paul Benedict does [TS]

00:06:52 ◼   ► it's really a star turn he should have [TS]

00:06:54 ◼   ► wanted a get awfully good he really is [TS]

00:06:56 ◼   ► it's a shame that people may know him [TS]

00:06:58 ◼   ► from from The Jeffersons I mean he was [TS]

00:07:01 ◼   ► great on The Jeffersons for sure but [TS]

00:07:03 ◼   ► yeah he's very very funny well I'm just [TS]

00:07:06 ◼   ► discovered this twisted old fruit ya I'm [TS]

00:07:09 ◼   ► just as God made me sir he walks away [TS]

00:07:11 ◼   ► with spinal taps doses just those [TS]

00:07:13 ◼   ► glasses this lasses are funny this gun [TS]

00:07:15 ◼   ► made me I say that I said at least once [TS]

00:07:17 ◼   ► a week oh I say it all the time yeah I [TS]

00:07:19 ◼   ► have to I have to pretty stock responses [TS]

00:07:22 ◼   ► to a random backhanded compliment on [TS]

00:07:24 ◼   ► Twitter one is I'm just as God made me [TS]

00:07:27 ◼   ► sir and the other one is a line from a [TS]

00:07:29 ◼   ► Smith song right I simply say sup girls [TS]

00:07:32 ◼   ► mothers are bigger than others same [TS]

00:07:35 ◼   ► record I say that's nothing you should [TS]

00:07:37 ◼   ► hear me play piano oh sure yeah oh sure [TS]

00:07:41 ◼   ► I said I know you and you cannot sing [TS]

00:07:43 ◼   ► that's nothing you should hear me play [TS]

00:07:45 ◼   ► don't know no funny enough you and I [TS]

00:07:47 ◼   ► quoted me first melodies have to know [TS]

00:07:49 ◼   ► I'm singing the third singing the third [TS]

00:07:52 ◼   ► horrible horrible working yeah we just [TS]

00:07:56 ◼   ► cited the first and last track on the [TS]

00:07:59 ◼   ► 1986 album the queen is dead nineteen [TS]

00:08:01 ◼   ► eighty-six by which point in time the [TS]

00:08:05 ◼   ► tide had turned that was the best record [TS]

00:08:07 ◼   ► we were on to something else by then [TS]

00:08:09 ◼   ► yeah it has a valedictory kind of that [TS]

00:08:13 ◼   ► the word I'm looking for it has a yeah I [TS]

00:08:16 ◼   ► mean you know they did the what they do [TS]

00:08:17 ◼   ► after that they did rank but no that was [TS]

00:08:21 ◼   ► that's Cena Meat Is Murder I don't think [TS]

00:08:23 ◼   ► that's that strong of a record it's got [TS]

00:08:25 ◼   ► sad master ritual one of the great songs [TS]

00:08:27 ◼   ► agreed that it is not that strong of a [TS]

00:08:29 ◼   ► record okay so say there's cheese upon [TS]

00:08:32 ◼   ► which we can all agree yeah we can agree [TS]

00:08:35 ◼   ► upon the cheese that the Smiths are not [TS]

00:08:37 ◼   ► very negative you can't land a fraction [TS]

00:08:40 ◼   ► we've been working on fractions over [TS]

00:08:44 ◼   ► here at the house you [TS]

00:08:45 ◼   ► kidding already well this is the price [TS]

00:08:47 ◼   ► that she's had a birthday not too long [TS]

00:08:49 ◼   ► ago yes she did and creamy to say happy [TS]

00:08:52 ◼   ► birthday to people for their kids it's [TS]

00:08:54 ◼   ► weird but it was on my calendar so you [TS]

00:08:56 ◼   ► know belated happy birthday at all you [TS]

00:08:57 ◼   ► creep oh thank you thank you aware that [TS]

00:09:00 ◼   ► I I meditated upon and I went holy God [TS]

00:09:02 ◼   ► how is John's child dattels did you say [TS]

00:09:07 ◼   ► kumquat a comma or whatever but who will [TS]

00:09:10 ◼   ► call cops say what could you call me [TS]

00:09:13 ◼   ► becca boo boo I we did we had a birthday [TS]

00:09:18 ◼   ► and you know when I said to her would [TS]

00:09:22 ◼   ► you like to go to the museum or to the [TS]

00:09:24 ◼   ► zoo or to a a wide open park and she [TS]

00:09:28 ◼   ► said no I would like to go to the family [TS]

00:09:29 ◼   ► fun center which is a place here in [TS]

00:09:32 ◼   ► Seattle that is kind of like being [TS]

00:09:34 ◼   ► inside a pachinko game oh no is it like [TS]

00:09:37 ◼   ► a Charles E Cheese it's it's worse it's [TS]

00:09:41 ◼   ► Thursday Dave's and busters it's like [TS]

00:09:44 ◼   ► the airport at in Reno know for kids it [TS]

00:09:49 ◼   ► teaches them how to use slot machines it [TS]

00:09:51 ◼   ► teaches them overstimulation center it's [TS]

00:09:54 ◼   ► just like beaming nobody imagines me and [TS]

00:09:59 ◼   ► but there are also rides like inside [TS]

00:10:03 ◼   ► rides things that you know those things [TS]

00:10:06 ◼   ► that take you up high and then drop you [TS]

00:10:07 ◼   ► down but it's all inside a giant box [TS]

00:10:09 ◼   ► okay and there's a pizza parlor and if [TS]

00:10:12 ◼   ► you and when you're playing these arcade [TS]

00:10:14 ◼   ► games it it rewards you in tickets and [TS]

00:10:16 ◼   ► then you take the tickets over the [TS]

00:10:17 ◼   ► counter and you buy a rubber fish or [TS]

00:10:19 ◼   ► something yeah a rubber fish and then [TS]

00:10:21 ◼   ► outdoor outdoors there's a miniature [TS]

00:10:24 ◼   ► golf there's some big big rides and then [TS]

00:10:27 ◼   ► gas powered go-karts oh my goodness and [TS]

00:10:32 ◼   ► so she wanted to go I was like I really [TS]

00:10:36 ◼   ► don't want to you know like we're trying [TS]

00:10:38 ◼   ► to be we're trying to be good parents [TS]

00:10:40 ◼   ► we're trying to present ourselves as [TS]

00:10:41 ◼   ► parents that read the read you stories [TS]

00:10:44 ◼   ► at night about the you know the Jewish [TS]

00:10:47 ◼   ► Diaspora we're not trying to be parents [TS]

00:10:49 ◼   ► that are like we're having a birthday [TS]

00:10:51 ◼   ► party at you know at the Reno Airport [TS]

00:10:55 ◼   ► and so all of the moms [TS]

00:10:57 ◼   ► who go to our sort of a pas de take the [TS]

00:11:02 ◼   ► places where there's a surpassing number [TS]

00:11:04 ◼   ► of people vaping yeah oh my god you know [TS]

00:11:08 ◼   ► her birthday party is at a now a venue [TS]

00:11:11 ◼   ► where there are police officers [TS]

00:11:12 ◼   ► stationed well you know well I will come [TS]

00:11:16 ◼   ► back to this but there's there's the [TS]

00:11:17 ◼   ► rumor was that there there are rashes of [TS]

00:11:19 ◼   ► fights that happen at charles e cheeses [TS]

00:11:21 ◼   ► there's been some research that doesn't [TS]

00:11:23 ◼   ► exactly prove that but these family fun [TS]

00:11:26 ◼   ► centers are not always fun for the [TS]

00:11:27 ◼   ► family let alone near the center boy [TS]

00:11:29 ◼   ► I'll say all the reason did they serve [TS]

00:11:31 ◼   ► alcohol at the family fun center at this [TS]

00:11:34 ◼   ► fun least remember I do not know okay [TS]

00:11:36 ◼   ► I'm not sure you know I but you notice [TS]

00:11:39 ◼   ► any any too much adult grab-ass going on [TS]

00:11:41 ◼   ► Oh plenty plenty of adult grab-ass I [TS]

00:11:45 ◼   ► mean they're they're cops not only [TS]

00:11:46 ◼   ► parked out front with their like gang [TS]

00:11:48 ◼   ► cars they're blacked out gang cars but [TS]

00:11:52 ◼   ► there are like cops just leaning against [TS]

00:11:53 ◼   ► the wall in there just like hanging out [TS]

00:11:56 ◼   ► by ms pacman making sure there's no [TS]

00:11:57 ◼   ► monkey business going on just hanging [TS]

00:11:59 ◼   ► out yeah and miss back man you know [TS]

00:12:01 ◼   ► there was no such thing no this was all [TS]

00:12:03 ◼   ► like throw the ball into the hoop winner [TS]

00:12:06 ◼   ► what win a plastic foot long walk uh [TS]

00:12:09 ◼   ► Anna pizza parlor where they served [TS]

00:12:11 ◼   ► pictures of different fluorescent [TS]

00:12:15 ◼   ► colored juice you know like drank [TS]

00:12:19 ◼   ► basically like green drank freeload like [TS]

00:12:22 ◼   ► purple drank in case you want to get get [TS]

00:12:26 ◼   ► screwed up or crunk down yeah so for [TS]

00:12:29 ◼   ► months every time her birthday would [TS]

00:12:32 ◼   ► come up which it came up all the time [TS]

00:12:34 ◼   ► because you know it's a major miles the [TS]

00:12:36 ◼   ► major thing on her horizon beats with [TS]

00:12:38 ◼   ► Chris Christmas in terms of the looking [TS]

00:12:40 ◼   ► forward to you and how this will be [TS]

00:12:42 ◼   ► different this next time exactly a lot [TS]

00:12:45 ◼   ► so birthday's coming up here so what did [TS]

00:12:48 ◼   ► we say we were known as it's like the [TS]

00:12:50 ◼   ► day of my daughter's wedding it really [TS]

00:12:52 ◼   ► is it's like The Godfather is not [TS]

00:12:54 ◼   ► allowed to say no she this is where she [TS]

00:12:55 ◼   ► tries to jam in the most over-the-top [TS]

00:12:58 ◼   ► nonsensical thing she says when it's my [TS]

00:13:00 ◼   ► birthday next time yeah yeah yeah yeah [TS]

00:13:03 ◼   ► yeah [TS]

00:13:04 ◼   ► yeah we're going to get a hundred [TS]

00:13:05 ◼   ► thousand pallets of strawberries and [TS]

00:13:07 ◼   ► yeah i remember my senior year the [TS]

00:13:11 ◼   ► anchorage daily news sent a reporter and [TS]

00:13:15 ◼   ► a photographer to document our senior [TS]

00:13:18 ◼   ► class all the way through the year and [TS]

00:13:21 ◼   ► so they showed up at the beginning of [TS]

00:13:23 ◼   ► this the this our senior year and they [TS]

00:13:25 ◼   ► picked a half a dozen seniors that they [TS]

00:13:29 ◼   ► were going to follow all year long and [TS]

00:13:31 ◼   ► document you know what happened and i [TS]

00:13:34 ◼   ► was one of the seniors and one of the [TS]

00:13:37 ◼   ► other seniors was sort of that like the [TS]

00:13:39 ◼   ► head cheerleader and the night of our [TS]

00:13:42 ◼   ► prom scene senior ball at two o'clock in [TS]

00:13:48 ◼   ► the morning I had to go to work because [TS]

00:13:50 ◼   ► I was a VJ on Anchorage's of course you [TS]

00:13:54 ◼   ► know music television station catch-22 [TS]

00:13:56 ◼   ► and so you know that the photographer [TS]

00:14:00 ◼   ► and the reporter one of the things they [TS]

00:14:02 ◼   ► did that night was they you know cuz i'm [TS]

00:14:04 ◼   ► there at the dance and then after the [TS]

00:14:06 ◼   ► dance go to a big party my date and i [TS]

00:14:08 ◼   ► are there you know kiss under the [TS]

00:14:11 ◼   ► mistletoe or whatever you do want to [TS]

00:14:12 ◼   ► senior ball and then i was like sorry [TS]

00:14:15 ◼   ► I've got to go to work which at the time [TS]

00:14:17 ◼   ► seemed very baller right very like I've [TS]

00:14:21 ◼   ► got to go to work at the TV station [TS]

00:14:23 ◼   ► sorry gotta gotta bail on your little [TS]

00:14:25 ◼   ► high school party and so there's a [TS]

00:14:28 ◼   ► picture of me in the in the newspaper in [TS]

00:14:30 ◼   ► my tuxedo like clocking in to my job [TS]

00:14:33 ◼   ► where there was no one else right I ran [TS]

00:14:35 ◼   ► that TV station all by myself in the [TS]

00:14:37 ◼   ► middle of the night so quadruple e cool [TS]

00:14:40 ◼   ► like oh they just handed over the TV [TS]

00:14:42 ◼   ► station to the 17 year old but the girl [TS]

00:14:47 ◼   ► that was the head cheerleader her mother [TS]

00:14:50 ◼   ► on the night of the prom where she's [TS]

00:14:53 ◼   ► getting dressed in some kind of thing [TS]

00:14:55 ◼   ► from the top of a wedding cake you know [TS]

00:14:57 ◼   ► like it's like Anna and Elsa but [TS]

00:15:01 ◼   ► bleached completely white who everything [TS]

00:15:04 ◼   ► right she's getting dressed up I don't [TS]

00:15:06 ◼   ► know she had a tiara but almost and her [TS]

00:15:08 ◼   ► mother says to the reporters after her [TS]

00:15:12 ◼   ► wedding day tonight is the most [TS]

00:15:15 ◼   ► important [TS]

00:15:15 ◼   ► night of her life so we want to make [TS]

00:15:18 ◼   ► everything perfect God and that sentence [TS]

00:15:23 ◼   ► just like just reverberation you knew [TS]

00:15:26 ◼   ► that was a little bit I can do it was [TS]

00:15:28 ◼   ► just like wait a minute what who how [TS]

00:15:31 ◼   ► like the prom no and I don't think that [TS]

00:15:36 ◼   ► that is such a terrible it's alongside [TS]

00:15:39 ◼   ► like these are the best years of your [TS]

00:15:40 ◼   ► life like it's such a terrible message [TS]

00:15:43 ◼   ► yeah no they are not no not no you need [TS]

00:15:46 ◼   ► for the opposite it gets better as dan [TS]

00:15:48 ◼   ► savage says like do not oh my god tell [TS]

00:15:52 ◼   ► the boss you're in a period now that's [TS]

00:15:54 ◼   ► like a terrible rounding error in your [TS]

00:15:55 ◼   ► life that you will actually get over [TS]

00:15:58 ◼   ► your senior ball yeah no no it's no but [TS]

00:16:02 ◼   ► I also like to compare it to the wedding [TS]

00:16:03 ◼   ► how great is that yeah right bo to make [TS]

00:16:06 ◼   ► a man happy this is your last time to be [TS]

00:16:08 ◼   ► on a wedding cake by herself the wedding [TS]

00:16:10 ◼   ► which is the most important obviously [TS]

00:16:13 ◼   ► and the thing is I think that my pet and [TS]

00:16:15 ◼   ► and this girl who at the time was um you [TS]

00:16:19 ◼   ► know she was a figure of fascination to [TS]

00:16:22 ◼   ► me because she was in that other world [TS]

00:16:24 ◼   ► right she's the head cheerleader shit [TS]

00:16:26 ◼   ► this is the 80s so her bangs went up [TS]

00:16:29 ◼   ► like the cliffs of Dover up above her [TS]

00:16:32 ◼   ► head and were sprayed up into her hair [TS]

00:16:35 ◼   ► was just this phoenicia dead like that [TS]

00:16:36 ◼   ► front hair muffin thing we're kind of [TS]

00:16:38 ◼   ► cascades over oh yeah her senior [TS]

00:16:41 ◼   ► photographed her hair is bigger than the [TS]

00:16:43 ◼   ► rest of her huh and you know and she [TS]

00:16:46 ◼   ► hadn't even her name was a name that [TS]

00:16:48 ◼   ► suggested a kind of like bubbly [TS]

00:16:51 ◼   ► vivacious you know go get her person and [TS]

00:16:54 ◼   ► so she was both a figure of fascination [TS]

00:16:56 ◼   ► and you know and somebody that I was [TS]

00:16:59 ◼   ► like Ike I stole her license plate at [TS]

00:17:01 ◼   ► what she had a personalized license [TS]

00:17:03 ◼   ► plate on here and I just go boys her [TS]

00:17:05 ◼   ► name it was her name God and I and I and [TS]

00:17:09 ◼   ► I put the license plate on the wall of [TS]

00:17:12 ◼   ► my room in a point place of pride and [TS]

00:17:13 ◼   ► she would she would come to me with her [TS]

00:17:16 ◼   ► like gang of seven girls and say I want [TS]

00:17:19 ◼   ► my license playback I know you have it [TS]

00:17:20 ◼   ► and I would stand there in my like smug [TS]

00:17:23 ◼   ► tortoiseshell glasses proto asshole [TS]

00:17:27 ◼   ► if you like listen listen I don't you've [TS]

00:17:31 ◼   ► got the wrong information she's like I [TS]

00:17:34 ◼   ► know you are my license plate on the [TS]

00:17:35 ◼   ► wallet room I've heard it from multiple [TS]

00:17:37 ◼   ► anyway I eventually gave her her to [TS]

00:17:39 ◼   ► license plate back because how you talk [TS]

00:17:41 ◼   ► to it at the end of the year at the end [TS]

00:17:43 ◼   ► of the year I repaid all debts today is [TS]

00:17:46 ◼   ► a day where I repay all that oh you [TS]

00:17:48 ◼   ► settle all the family's business slot [TS]

00:17:50 ◼   ► Chi mm-hmm uh and so I went around I [TS]

00:17:55 ◼   ► gave I gave a girl Moe green I gave a [TS]

00:17:59 ◼   ► girl a two hundred dollars in one dollar [TS]

00:18:03 ◼   ► bills like two fat stacks of one dollar [TS]

00:18:09 ◼   ► bills because I owed her I owed her [TS]

00:18:11 ◼   ► something and I was like and I said you [TS]

00:18:14 ◼   ► know I can oh and I put it inside of a [TS]

00:18:16 ◼   ► VHS cassette tape case so accurate so [TS]

00:18:21 ◼   ► where'd you put so much work into this [TS]

00:18:23 ◼   ► yeah well I got a little present for you [TS]

00:18:25 ◼   ► know and everything I money back then [TS]

00:18:27 ◼   ► well fuck it was a huge amount of money [TS]

00:18:29 ◼   ► but I was settling all scores because I [TS]

00:18:31 ◼   ► was leaked I was out of there I was [TS]

00:18:33 ◼   ► leaving Alaska and I wanted everybody [TS]

00:18:35 ◼   ► you know you get your license plate back [TS]

00:18:38 ◼   ► here's two hundred dollars in a in a VHS [TS]

00:18:40 ◼   ► you know like here's your bicycle back I [TS]

00:18:42 ◼   ► was going around I was a terrible [TS]

00:18:44 ◼   ► terrible terrible teenager to my peers [TS]

00:18:46 ◼   ► right and so I had a lot of debts to [TS]

00:18:48 ◼   ► repay yeah I actually went over to a [TS]

00:18:51 ◼   ► friend's house and like a sheetrock and [TS]

00:18:55 ◼   ► spackled a hole that I had made in the [TS]

00:18:57 ◼   ► wall of his living room oh my goodness i [TS]

00:18:59 ◼   ► had a lot of stuff to do i had a lot of [TS]

00:19:01 ◼   ► debts to repay Wow every once in a while [TS]

00:19:03 ◼   ► i'll post something on the internet some [TS]

00:19:05 ◼   ► picture of me from high school and i'll [TS]

00:19:06 ◼   ► get three or four comments from people [TS]

00:19:07 ◼   ► that i knew in high school that are just [TS]

00:19:09 ◼   ► like fuck you you would such a bit he [TS]

00:19:12 ◼   ► made my list still suck you really now [TS]

00:19:15 ◼   ► that I see that picture of you that old [TS]

00:19:17 ◼   ► face of you I remember how much I [TS]

00:19:19 ◼   ► despise you but anyway so this girl has [TS]

00:19:22 ◼   ► become a good friend of mine she lives [TS]

00:19:24 ◼   ► here in Seattle she's incredibly a [TS]

00:19:26 ◼   ► cheerleader yeah no kidding yeah yeah [TS]

00:19:29 ◼   ► she's one of those people that turn that [TS]

00:19:31 ◼   ► that remained like really vivacious and [TS]

00:19:37 ◼   ► she's incredibly supportive like [TS]

00:19:39 ◼   ► everybody that she knew [TS]

00:19:41 ◼   ► act then she's rooting for them you know [TS]

00:19:44 ◼   ► that's not the outcome I was hoping for [TS]

00:19:45 ◼   ► I hate to say no I feel ya you you [TS]

00:19:48 ◼   ► thought she was gonna get some kind of [TS]

00:19:49 ◼   ► like comeuppance but in fact she like [TS]

00:19:51 ◼   ► she lives in bellevue she's I thought [TS]

00:19:55 ◼   ► she'd end up doing meth in a Ford Escort [TS]

00:19:57 ◼   ► no she's a she's a she's like she comes [TS]

00:20:01 ◼   ► to long winters shows and it's not her [TS]

00:20:04 ◼   ► miliar right like she's really reaching [TS]

00:20:06 ◼   ► out yeah her husband works at Microsoft [TS]

00:20:09 ◼   ► they live in a big house they're very [TS]

00:20:11 ◼   ► they go to vacation in Arizona or [TS]

00:20:14 ◼   ► whatever but she comes and she is like [TS]

00:20:16 ◼   ► she's not only like at the show but [TS]

00:20:19 ◼   ► she's also spreading the word of how [TS]

00:20:21 ◼   ► good it is to all of the people that [TS]

00:20:23 ◼   ► inner high school it's like really [TS]

00:20:25 ◼   ► delightful what a nice person she turned [TS]

00:20:28 ◼   ► into and I also turned into a nice [TS]

00:20:30 ◼   ► person so what do you know hmm right [TS]

00:20:32 ◼   ► like the niceness got on us somehow and [TS]

00:20:35 ◼   ► can't shake it which which step is the [TS]

00:20:37 ◼   ► amends somewhere let's see let's see [TS]

00:20:42 ◼   ► over alcohol and and my life had become [TS]

00:20:46 ◼   ► unmanageable then believe that the power [TS]

00:20:49 ◼   ► grid myself could restore me steps at [TS]

00:20:51 ◼   ► nine yeah nine all the way out there you [TS]

00:20:54 ◼   ► got to make a list mm-hmm of all the [TS]

00:20:56 ◼   ► people and then go around make amends to [TS]

00:20:58 ◼   ► them a step 8 you make a list of people [TS]

00:21:00 ◼   ► who are harm step 9 you make direct [TS]

00:21:03 ◼   ► amends step step 10 you don't talk about [TS]

00:21:05 ◼   ► Fight Club direct amends where possible [TS]

00:21:08 ◼   ► except i went to do so would injure them [TS]

00:21:12 ◼   ► or others yes speak and they needed to [TS]

00:21:14 ◼   ► put that in there because think about it [TS]

00:21:16 ◼   ► some people don't want to be amended [TS]

00:21:17 ◼   ► that's right and all the asshole uh all [TS]

00:21:21 ◼   ► the asshole alcoholics who are nine [TS]

00:21:23 ◼   ► steps into their recovery are like you [TS]

00:21:25 ◼   ► know what I'm gonna go to my fucking ex [TS]

00:21:27 ◼   ► girlfriend and I'm gonna make amends to [TS]

00:21:28 ◼   ► her whether she likes it or not I'm [TS]

00:21:30 ◼   ► gonna mend the shit out of this that's [TS]

00:21:32 ◼   ► right you know this is a good excuse to [TS]

00:21:34 ◼   ► go back to that place that I was [TS]

00:21:36 ◼   ► permanently barred from and make amends [TS]

00:21:39 ◼   ► and they and that restraining order [TS]

00:21:41 ◼   ► won't apply because I'm making amends [TS]

00:21:42 ◼   ► that's right there's an asterisk on [TS]

00:21:44 ◼   ► every restraining order that's right [TS]

00:21:46 ◼   ► sorry it's not how it works keep Europe [TS]

00:21:49 ◼   ► you know keep your amends pop you know [TS]

00:21:51 ◼   ► what you were getting into [TS]

00:21:52 ◼   ► you went with me you knew you knew what [TS]

00:21:55 ◼   ► I was like when you went with me you [TS]

00:21:58 ◼   ► went with me did you go with somebody in [TS]

00:22:00 ◼   ► high school the going with yours yeah [TS]

00:22:02 ◼   ► did you go with somebody I exclusively [TS]

00:22:04 ◼   ► went with a one person well no I'm a [TS]

00:22:07 ◼   ► serial monogamist I never dated but [TS]

00:22:10 ◼   ► basically to me a date in retrospect is [TS]

00:22:13 ◼   ► just an unsuccessful long-term [TS]

00:22:15 ◼   ► relationship mm-hmm I never I mean all [TS]

00:22:18 ◼   ► of all every date I ever had was a [TS]

00:22:20 ◼   ► shitshow by going back to like seventh [TS]

00:22:22 ◼   ► grade and being a military school and [TS]

00:22:24 ◼   ► going to the cotillion with Elaine [TS]

00:22:26 ◼   ► poorly hello hello Cora lane uh did you [TS]

00:22:30 ◼   ► add time that night oh god yes but we're [TS]

00:22:34 ◼   ► using a sword re wearing a sorcerers now [TS]

00:22:36 ◼   ► that's just that's just the I think the [TS]

00:22:38 ◼   ► company guy Don gets a sword I didn't [TS]

00:22:40 ◼   ► get that no no but I had a [TS]

00:22:42 ◼   ► double-breasted navy blue suit with [TS]

00:22:44 ◼   ► patches and my rank which is a seaman [TS]

00:22:46 ◼   ► navigator FEMEN am i might have been i [TS]

00:22:48 ◼   ► might have been a petty officer 3rd [TS]

00:22:50 ◼   ► class at that point mmm yeah i drink [TS]

00:22:53 ◼   ► quickly i move quickly through through [TS]

00:22:55 ◼   ► through the ranks was this like the [TS]

00:22:57 ◼   ► movie taps as discussed previously i [TS]

00:23:02 ◼   ► always had a lot of problems with pretty [TS]

00:23:04 ◼   ► much every military school movie in [TS]

00:23:07 ◼   ► terms of like some aspect that they got [TS]

00:23:09 ◼   ► incredibly wrong because on the one hand [TS]

00:23:11 ◼   ► the school that I went to was not a [TS]

00:23:13 ◼   ► strictly a punishment school it was very [TS]

00:23:16 ◼   ► costly but it was not it is not like the [TS]

00:23:18 ◼   ► goddamn military school where you send [TS]

00:23:20 ◼   ► the goddamn you know what's his name kid [TS]

00:23:22 ◼   ► it was um but it also was not a prep I [TS]

00:23:26 ◼   ► mean it was a prep school but it wasn't [TS]

00:23:28 ◼   ► you and I mean like is portrayed in [TS]

00:23:31 ◼   ► movies it's some combination of a place [TS]

00:23:34 ◼   ► you send a bad kid like a Donald Trump [TS]

00:23:35 ◼   ► to get straightened out right boys for [TS]

00:23:38 ◼   ► rigid military includes a via my junior [TS]

00:23:40 ◼   ► yeah and it wasn't really either those [TS]

00:23:42 ◼   ► but it was very it was very military I [TS]

00:23:46 ◼   ► mean in the sense that like you didn't [TS]

00:23:49 ◼   ► get to have any kind of fucking Tom [TS]

00:23:50 ◼   ► Cruise haircut when you were there like [TS]

00:23:51 ◼   ► you had to get your hair cut and you had [TS]

00:23:53 ◼   ► to like you had to shine your shoes and [TS]

00:23:56 ◼   ► you know like the proper way you [TS]

00:23:58 ◼   ► couldn't cheat you couldn't like you [TS]

00:23:59 ◼   ► know put but uh what's that stuff we [TS]

00:24:02 ◼   ► used to use shine and glow you like [TS]

00:24:03 ◼   ► couldn't fake it yet the really shine [TS]

00:24:05 ◼   ► your shoes you to clean your [TS]

00:24:06 ◼   ► room every morning you know I was on [TS]

00:24:08 ◼   ► drill team so I marched even more than I [TS]

00:24:10 ◼   ► needed to so you couldn't sit up in the [TS]

00:24:13 ◼   ► top floor window like Tom Cruise with an [TS]

00:24:15 ◼   ► m60 machine gun and shoot at tanks until [TS]

00:24:17 ◼   ► they blew up you can't go to the top [TS]

00:24:18 ◼   ► window I don't think until you're at [TS]

00:24:20 ◼   ► least you're an upperclassman yeah so [TS]

00:24:21 ◼   ► were there people in your school that [TS]

00:24:23 ◼   ► fast-tracked into Annapolis um I imagine [TS]

00:24:26 ◼   ► so I was only there for seventh grade so [TS]

00:24:29 ◼   ► I but no i mean like look who went there [TS]

00:24:32 ◼   ► oh I think Ashton Kutcher what's my [TS]

00:24:35 ◼   ► military school really i think i'm on [TS]

00:24:39 ◼   ► the page of i think i'm on the page of [TS]

00:24:43 ◼   ► alumni from this school I will find out [TS]

00:24:45 ◼   ► he's going to find out admiral farragut [TS]

00:24:48 ◼   ► academy there's one in there's one in [TS]

00:24:51 ◼   ► New Jersey oh it's a multi thing and [TS]

00:24:55 ◼   ► there's one in st. Petersburg okay here [TS]

00:24:56 ◼   ► we go here's a few CEO Spike Mendelsohn [TS]

00:24:59 ◼   ► from Top Chef yeah the the singer and [TS]

00:25:03 ◼   ► songwriter guitarist stephen stills uh [TS]

00:25:05 ◼   ► really you know I've met and performed [TS]

00:25:09 ◼   ► with stephen stills according to [TS]

00:25:10 ◼   ► wikipedia internet personality merlin [TS]

00:25:12 ◼   ► mann attended at st. Petersburg where he [TS]

00:25:15 ◼   ► was a member of diplomacy club Oh [TS]

00:25:16 ◼   ► diplomacy was all true well Lorenzo [TS]

00:25:19 ◼   ► Lamas Lorenzo Lamas Lorenzo Lamas of [TS]

00:25:21 ◼   ► course famous alum Lorenzo Lamas uh-huh [TS]

00:25:24 ◼   ► did you so what happened to a lame that [TS]

00:25:27 ◼   ► night well here's the thing she just [TS]

00:25:29 ◼   ► bored or did you spill the soup partner [TS]

00:25:31 ◼   ► or whatever I mean it was my first like [TS]

00:25:35 ◼   ► the closest thing to like an actual date [TS]

00:25:37 ◼   ► that I had been on I was 13 years old [TS]

00:25:39 ◼   ► and here's the thing so so bad so there [TS]

00:25:42 ◼   ► was this woman who was the widow of a [TS]

00:25:45 ◼   ► contributor major contributor to the [TS]

00:25:47 ◼   ► school she taught dancing lessons and so [TS]

00:25:50 ◼   ► you would go to dancing lessons in if [TS]

00:25:52 ◼   ► memory serves it was in the building [TS]

00:25:54 ◼   ► that was named after her husband he pay [TS]

00:25:56 ◼   ► forty five dollars 49 dance lessons you [TS]

00:25:58 ◼   ► get a bunch of dorky boys over here from [TS]

00:26:01 ◼   ► Admiral Farragut and then they trucked [TS]

00:26:03 ◼   ► in all of these girls from a different [TS]

00:26:05 ◼   ► private school it was it was a total [TS]

00:26:07 ◼   ► racket oh and there were dance classes [TS]

00:26:09 ◼   ► and so you would go in dance classes and [TS]

00:26:11 ◼   ► you learn you learn how to disco dance [TS]

00:26:13 ◼   ► you learn how to waltz you know you had [TS]

00:26:16 ◼   ► to like touch a girl and dance was [TS]

00:26:17 ◼   ► horrifying yeah and this culminated [TS]

00:26:19 ◼   ► and it is all like preparation first of [TS]

00:26:21 ◼   ► all I'd padded this lady's purse quite [TS]

00:26:23 ◼   ► night first quite nicely but then you [TS]

00:26:25 ◼   ► end up going to the cotillion so the [TS]

00:26:27 ◼   ► cotillion you wear your dress blues you [TS]

00:26:30 ◼   ► know the girls got a fancy dress and a [TS]

00:26:31 ◼   ► croissant her wrist and elaine was [TS]

00:26:34 ◼   ► probably i got a picture here somewhere [TS]

00:26:35 ◼   ► elaine was probably a good six inches [TS]

00:26:37 ◼   ► taller than me I don't think she liked [TS]

00:26:40 ◼   ► me and I I think she really barely [TS]

00:26:43 ◼   ► suffered through the whole night she was [TS]

00:26:45 ◼   ► a good sport but like I was not a good [TS]

00:26:47 ◼   ► person to be on a date with and and how [TS]

00:26:49 ◼   ► were you paired you ask him you know [TS]

00:26:52 ◼   ► back in dance class usually I see I see [TS]

00:26:55 ◼   ► and so was she did she appeal to you [TS]

00:26:58 ◼   ► yeah I mean I thought she was really [TS]

00:27:00 ◼   ► cute she was like she was a tall slender [TS]

00:27:02 ◼   ► you know Chinese American Girl and there [TS]

00:27:07 ◼   ► was there's another girl in the class [TS]

00:27:08 ◼   ► that I was desperately attracted to but [TS]

00:27:10 ◼   ► that was never going to happen she wore [TS]

00:27:12 ◼   ► like you know white jeans and one of [TS]

00:27:13 ◼   ► those little like double belts not white [TS]

00:27:15 ◼   ► jeans and a double-double belt the loop [TS]

00:27:18 ◼   ► around belt no I was pretty hot look in [TS]

00:27:20 ◼   ► 1979 yeah was it was uh it was it was a [TS]

00:27:24 ◼   ► little bit like yeah it's not vacation [TS]

00:27:27 ◼   ► Elaine ended up being somewhat [TS]

00:27:29 ◼   ► prototypical of my type in some ways [TS]

00:27:31 ◼   ► like a slender or awkward bookish mmm no [TS]

00:27:36 ◼   ► I mean it wasn't it wasn't terrible and [TS]

00:27:38 ◼   ► ended okay there wasn't any like kissing [TS]

00:27:40 ◼   ► or anything there's no graphics as you [TS]

00:27:42 ◼   ► say none yeah did you know the first six [TS]

00:27:47 ◼   ► girls that I made it with all had red [TS]

00:27:52 ◼   ► hair and I didn't miss any oxygen [TS]

00:27:56 ◼   ► history John well it I didn't notice it [TS]

00:27:59 ◼   ► until uh until one day I was sitting [TS]

00:28:04 ◼   ► reflecting and said wait a minute you're [TS]

00:28:08 ◼   ► kidding I have only ever been with girls [TS]

00:28:11 ◼   ► with red hair I was like but that's not [TS]

00:28:14 ◼   ► even that's not even it wasn't like red [TS]

00:28:17 ◼   ► haired girls were not who I would have [TS]

00:28:19 ◼   ► identified that's not your wheelhouse my [TS]

00:28:22 ◼   ► type right up unit like a small sturdy [TS]

00:28:24 ◼   ► Jewess in combat boots if memory serves [TS]

00:28:27 ◼   ► mm-hmm sturdy cheers uh you know like [TS]

00:28:30 ◼   ► ready to go I like a like [TS]

00:28:32 ◼   ► a little Jewish or little dark-haired [TS]

00:28:34 ◼   ► girl right she can be a jolly good site [TS]

00:28:36 ◼   ► you good sized nose like a latin girl or [TS]

00:28:39 ◼   ► a you know Mediterranean girl Semitic [TS]

00:28:42 ◼   ► girl yes ready to go right ready to [TS]

00:28:45 ◼   ► climb a fence I'm intense and she's got [TS]

00:28:47 ◼   ► the right shoes yep and you know and she [TS]

00:28:50 ◼   ► knows her way around a pistol mm-hmm [TS]

00:28:52 ◼   ► because she is a pistol as my dad would [TS]

00:28:55 ◼   ► say she's little that's terrific alert [TS]

00:28:58 ◼   ► she's a boy she's a pistol uh but that [TS]

00:29:02 ◼   ► gal but red hair my you know my first [TS]

00:29:06 ◼   ► girlfriend had hair like an Irish setter [TS]

00:29:08 ◼   ► and then it was just like Reza Reza [TS]

00:29:11 ◼   ► through the doctor yeah okay Oh in we [TS]

00:29:14 ◼   ► don't we stop mentioning her name right [TS]

00:29:16 ◼   ► cuz cuz people her yeah we stopped [TS]

00:29:18 ◼   ► mentioning her name somebody sent me any [TS]

00:29:20 ◼   ► email or text when they said it's unah [TS]

00:29:23 ◼   ► Twitter look at the link to her bio it [TS]

00:29:25 ◼   ► Princeton well she's fine she's even [TS]

00:29:28 ◼   ► she'll be fine cheeky she walks around [TS]

00:29:30 ◼   ► with a retinue of security officers [TS]

00:29:32 ◼   ► that's a good idea she sent me a text [TS]

00:29:34 ◼   ► and she said do you still have the pink [TS]

00:29:37 ◼   ► leopard spot tuxedo that my mother made [TS]

00:29:41 ◼   ► for you out of my father's wedding the [TS]

00:29:44 ◼   ► suit that we wore to the junior prom Oh [TS]

00:29:48 ◼   ► her mother made us matching outfits at [TS]

00:29:51 ◼   ► our request we went to a fabric store [TS]

00:29:53 ◼   ► she and I because this is the type of [TS]

00:29:55 ◼   ► thing what you do in high school in [TS]

00:29:57 ◼   ► Anchorage go to the fabric store her and [TS]

00:29:59 ◼   ► we found pink leopard spot satin there [TS]

00:30:03 ◼   ► and and my date and I bought a big role [TS]

00:30:07 ◼   ► of it and took it home to her mother who [TS]

00:30:09 ◼   ► was a seamstress and we said we want our [TS]

00:30:10 ◼   ► prom outfits made out of this pink satin [TS]

00:30:13 ◼   ► and so her mother made her strapless [TS]

00:30:16 ◼   ► ball gown out of black uh you know [TS]

00:30:21 ◼   ► taffeta and this pink leopard spot and [TS]

00:30:24 ◼   ► then she took her her husband's wedding [TS]

00:30:26 ◼   ► suit they'd been married in like [TS]

00:30:27 ◼   ► nineteen sixty and so he had this he was [TS]

00:30:30 ◼   ► he was my size a little bit maybe leaner [TS]

00:30:34 ◼   ► than I was but he had this black thin [TS]

00:30:38 ◼   ► thin lapel three button cuffed pants you [TS]

00:30:42 ◼   ► know 1959 wedding suit [TS]

00:30:44 ◼   ► because they were married in Oklahoma [TS]

00:30:46 ◼   ► and they didn't have tuxedos there and [TS]

00:30:48 ◼   ► she put pink taffeta pink pink satin [TS]

00:30:53 ◼   ► leopard spot on the lapels she covered [TS]

00:30:56 ◼   ► the buttons she put a stripe down the [TS]

00:30:59 ◼   ► side of the pan that sounds atrocious [TS]

00:31:01 ◼   ► she made a cummerbund and a bow tie and [TS]

00:31:05 ◼   ► a pocket square and like maybe even [TS]

00:31:08 ◼   ► lined the jacket with this pink pink [TS]

00:31:10 ◼   ► leopard spot if she says that cows a [TS]

00:31:12 ◼   ► pistol what a gamer she was a pistol [TS]

00:31:14 ◼   ► this was nineteen eighty-five like when [TS]

00:31:17 ◼   ► it was there was none none more black [TS]

00:31:19 ◼   ► yeah animal prints ran amok in 1980 yes [TS]

00:31:23 ◼   ► yeah and this was you know like somebody [TS]

00:31:25 ◼   ► was making this fabric right so the [TS]

00:31:28 ◼   ► presumption was it was going to get you [TS]

00:31:29 ◼   ► somewhere yeah anyway so I get a text [TS]

00:31:32 ◼   ► from my high school girlfriend saying my [TS]

00:31:35 ◼   ► son is going to junior prom and he would [TS]

00:31:40 ◼   ► like to wear your suit turn turn turn my [TS]

00:31:44 ◼   ► own father's wedding suit which was then [TS]

00:31:46 ◼   ► turned into your junior prom suit which [TS]

00:31:48 ◼   ► you she's asking me if I still have it [TS]

00:31:50 ◼   ► not only do I still have it i can still [TS]

00:31:52 ◼   ► wear it oh come on you said i'll of [TS]

00:31:54 ◼   ► course you stuck out of here John [TS]

00:31:55 ◼   ► Roderick yeah and I warrant you to carry [TS]

00:31:58 ◼   ► that through all of your moments in your [TS]

00:32:01 ◼   ► 20s I wore it to shawna nelson's wedding [TS]

00:32:04 ◼   ► wow I where'd all you know not all the [TS]

00:32:07 ◼   ► time but I would wear it to those events [TS]

00:32:08 ◼   ► where I was like you've got to come [TS]

00:32:10 ◼   ► correct to this event and I'm like oh do [TS]

00:32:14 ◼   ► you mean come correct like this perhaps [TS]

00:32:16 ◼   ► perchance did you see did you expect [TS]

00:32:19 ◼   ► this no one expects the fucking pink [TS]

00:32:22 ◼   ► leopard spot Inquisition oh so I'm [TS]

00:32:26 ◼   ► packaging this up i still have it and [TS]

00:32:28 ◼   ► all its accoutrements all of the pocket [TS]

00:32:32 ◼   ► square and the and the cummerbund and so [TS]

00:32:34 ◼   ► forth and i'm sending it off to the to [TS]

00:32:37 ◼   ► the northeast where this young man the [TS]

00:32:40 ◼   ► 16 year old second son is going to wear [TS]

00:32:43 ◼   ► it to his prom my god and then he's a [TS]

00:32:46 ◼   ► he's going to send it back to me and [TS]

00:32:48 ◼   ► then I'm I guess when my daughter is [TS]

00:32:50 ◼   ► ready for her problem I'm gonna ask I'm [TS]

00:32:54 ◼   ► gonna ask my my good friend to send her [TS]

00:32:56 ◼   ► dress [TS]

00:32:57 ◼   ► to me oh my goodness and it will just go [TS]

00:33:00 ◼   ► and then we will die but the suit and [TS]

00:33:02 ◼   ► dress will continue to go from coast to [TS]

00:33:05 ◼   ► coast ad infinitum this is suddenly [TS]

00:33:08 ◼   ► strangely touching that's amazing yeah [TS]

00:33:11 ◼   ► we're sending it back to you I think [TS]

00:33:13 ◼   ► it's very interesting i'm surprised she [TS]

00:33:14 ◼   ► wouldn't keep it for her own collection [TS]

00:33:16 ◼   ► well you know the thing is that her [TS]

00:33:20 ◼   ► father actually is is dying right now oh [TS]

00:33:24 ◼   ► god and i thought that he there down in [TS]

00:33:26 ◼   ► central oregon i thought i would go down [TS]

00:33:28 ◼   ► and visit him um Todd but then I [TS]

00:33:31 ◼   ► remembered that he despised me okay the [TS]

00:33:34 ◼   ► one thing that he would say to me [TS]

00:33:36 ◼   ► whenever I would come over to the house [TS]

00:33:38 ◼   ► which was all the time because she was [TS]

00:33:39 ◼   ► my girlfriend I would come in and he [TS]

00:33:41 ◼   ► would he would he had a chick you know [TS]

00:33:43 ◼   ► he had a chair like every adult man in [TS]

00:33:45 ◼   ► that era right like that's dad's chair [TS]

00:33:48 ◼   ► right and he'd be sitting in his chair [TS]

00:33:50 ◼   ► watching the McGill Larrabee's these [TS]

00:33:52 ◼   ► kids today don't understand like and he [TS]

00:33:54 ◼   ► dad dad had a chair and he would say as [TS]

00:33:57 ◼   ► I would walk in the entryway I'd be [TS]

00:33:59 ◼   ► kicking the snow off my boots and he [TS]

00:34:01 ◼   ► would say don't let the doorknob hit you [TS]

00:34:03 ◼   ► in the ass on the way out he'd be [TS]

00:34:05 ◼   ► sitting in the chair when he said that [TS]

00:34:06 ◼   ► he said Jeremy I would go and then I [TS]

00:34:08 ◼   ► would because it was a split-level house [TS]

00:34:10 ◼   ► because every house in Anchorage is a [TS]

00:34:11 ◼   ► split-level house I would just take the [TS]

00:34:13 ◼   ► down I would take the stairs down I [TS]

00:34:15 ◼   ► would I would not take the stairs up his [TS]

00:34:18 ◼   ► mom or her mom loved me they had a [TS]

00:34:21 ◼   ► wiener dog and the wiener dog was [TS]

00:34:23 ◼   ► terrified of wire hangers I don't want [TS]

00:34:27 ◼   ► to get into that that's the whole second [TS]

00:34:29 ◼   ► was the original owner of the wiener dog [TS]

00:34:31 ◼   ► yeah yeah yeah the wiener dog just hated [TS]

00:34:33 ◼   ► wire hangers and the we saw motor they [TS]

00:34:36 ◼   ► were used for punishment at some point [TS]

00:34:37 ◼   ► no no not at all there they were these [TS]

00:34:40 ◼   ► were lovely people okay but but my uh my [TS]

00:34:43 ◼   ► girlfriend's mother was a kind of boy [TS]

00:34:46 ◼   ► she was a pistol she really was a piss I [TS]

00:34:48 ◼   ► cows this line oh but you know she also [TS]

00:34:50 ◼   ► sheet she so she was a seamstress she [TS]

00:34:52 ◼   ► was a seamstress but also had been a [TS]

00:34:53 ◼   ► reporter before she was married she was [TS]

00:34:55 ◼   ► a journalist but she had a devilish [TS]

00:34:58 ◼   ► streak and she loved the wiener dog but [TS]

00:35:01 ◼   ► she would also sometimes just for [TS]

00:35:03 ◼   ► amusement take like four wire hangers [TS]

00:35:05 ◼   ► out of the closet just rattle them yeah [TS]

00:35:07 ◼   ► they're dogwood oh boy run around [TS]

00:35:10 ◼   ► hide under the couch it was hilarious [TS]

00:35:11 ◼   ► lots of laughs torturing animals then it [TS]

00:35:14 ◼   ► was before we realized animals had [TS]

00:35:16 ◼   ► feelings I would do that I play a [TS]

00:35:17 ◼   ► harmonica to make my dog car I he just [TS]

00:35:20 ◼   ► got all dogs hate harmonicas uh-huh it [TS]

00:35:24 ◼   ► was funny Oh mr. his head like this he [TS]

00:35:26 ◼   ► go hmm keep his head turn like this and [TS]

00:35:30 ◼   ► go home we have the blues mm-hmm sure [TS]

00:35:37 ◼   ► did uh yeah you know when you're coming [TS]

00:35:40 ◼   ► into your last what may be your last [TS]

00:35:42 ◼   ► days yeah you shouldn't go burn too much [TS]

00:35:46 ◼   ► that guy's time yeah just be down like [TS]

00:35:48 ◼   ► hey how are you John I guess about you [TS]

00:35:50 ◼   ► like especially like don't don't start [TS]

00:35:51 ◼   ► showing up like twice a day right [TS]

00:35:53 ◼   ► remember me yes yeah exactly I can ask [TS]

00:35:57 ◼   ► them but no I assume that she'll send me [TS]

00:36:01 ◼   ► the suit bag because uh because the suit [TS]

00:36:07 ◼   ► in the hands of a 16 year old is you [TS]

00:36:11 ◼   ► know I was a sixteen-year-old it was [TS]

00:36:12 ◼   ► fairly like already sentimental enough [TS]

00:36:15 ◼   ► to know like this is my prom suit I am [TS]

00:36:19 ◼   ► going to keep this I'm going to wear it [TS]

00:36:22 ◼   ► but I'm gonna wear it I'm not gonna like [TS]

00:36:24 ◼   ► this is not a suit that I'm gonna bleed [TS]

00:36:26 ◼   ► in look at y'all popping wheelies no [TS]

00:36:29 ◼   ► I've got suits I'm gonna bleed in this [TS]

00:36:32 ◼   ► is not and if you've made that [TS]

00:36:36 ◼   ► distinction though you know you're gonna [TS]

00:36:38 ◼   ► bleed you know you're gonna have suits [TS]

00:36:40 ◼   ► and you say this across this line you [TS]

00:36:42 ◼   ► know you do not cross yeah I have [TS]

00:36:44 ◼   ► definitely taken suits that be that over [TS]

00:36:48 ◼   ► the course of a night went from a nice [TS]

00:36:50 ◼   ► suit that I was wearing a suit you know [TS]

00:36:52 ◼   ► to being a suit that could not be [TS]

00:36:54 ◼   ► recovered like it to the usually blood [TS]

00:36:58 ◼   ► it could not be it was blood and it was [TS]

00:37:01 ◼   ► you know just like Matt Matt well yes [TS]

00:37:04 ◼   ► sure banner that turned into an organic [TS]

00:37:08 ◼   ► matter I mean there was certainly blood [TS]

00:37:10 ◼   ► on suits that could be dry cleaned out [TS]

00:37:12 ◼   ► but there were also suits that could not [TS]

00:37:14 ◼   ► be saved yeah about how upsetting to [TS]

00:37:18 ◼   ► people oops some people right but I were [TS]

00:37:21 ◼   ► like yeah like you look just [TS]

00:37:23 ◼   ► I ain't brown stain on abdomen can [TS]

00:37:26 ◼   ► disturb me yeah just or splatter even [TS]

00:37:29 ◼   ► worse like what outright happened but um [TS]

00:37:31 ◼   ► but you know I think generally when [TS]

00:37:34 ◼   ► you're getting ready to go out at night [TS]

00:37:35 ◼   ► in most cases if you're gonna get blood [TS]

00:37:38 ◼   ► on your suit you have a premonition [TS]

00:37:39 ◼   ► about it as you're getting dressed right [TS]

00:37:42 ◼   ► like you're thinking here's what I'm [TS]

00:37:44 ◼   ► going to this event oh you you think you [TS]

00:37:47 ◼   ► may be a smell trouble yeah you're not [TS]

00:37:49 ◼   ► gonna put on a white suit for instance [TS]

00:37:51 ◼   ► if you think that maybe you're gonna get [TS]

00:37:53 ◼   ► it's gonna get you know rough and tumble [TS]

00:37:55 ◼   ► so you put on a suit that you're like [TS]

00:37:58 ◼   ► you know what it's a suit coat if the [TS]

00:37:59 ◼   ► suit gets blown up yeah yeah but I don't [TS]

00:38:03 ◼   ► know her son well enough to know if he [TS]

00:38:05 ◼   ► feels that way and so him retaining the [TS]

00:38:09 ◼   ► suit in through the rest of his teen [TS]

00:38:12 ◼   ► years he might wear to some college [TS]

00:38:14 ◼   ► fraternity party and get blood on the [TS]

00:38:17 ◼   ► suit and that's you know like uh that's [TS]

00:38:21 ◼   ► not a thing that I'm prepared to risk [TS]

00:38:23 ◼   ► but if he wears it his prom it remains a [TS]

00:38:26 ◼   ► seat of fascination to him I will keep [TS]

00:38:31 ◼   ► the suit again meticulously and then [TS]

00:38:34 ◼   ► when he is in middle age if he's like [TS]

00:38:37 ◼   ► hey my my former bandmate is getting [TS]

00:38:39 ◼   ► married I need a suit for the wedding [TS]

00:38:40 ◼   ► can I have the suit yeah then of course [TS]

00:38:42 ◼   ► I will transfer ownership of the suit [TS]

00:38:44 ◼   ► tan cuz he you sense to he what he would [TS]

00:38:46 ◼   ► understand you don't don't bleed in this [TS]

00:38:48 ◼   ► it will also be his prom suit as well as [TS]

00:38:52 ◼   ► mine and it's his grandfather's wedding [TS]

00:38:55 ◼   ► suit mm-hmm and it passed through this [TS]

00:38:59 ◼   ► Creek euless crazy it passed through [TS]

00:39:01 ◼   ► this crazy story on its way to him but I [TS]

00:39:03 ◼   ► need to see a little bit of sign that [TS]

00:39:05 ◼   ► this kid's got the got the maturity to [TS]

00:39:08 ◼   ► handle that story cuz that's a fucking [TS]

00:39:10 ◼   ► head story you know yeah not not every [TS]

00:39:13 ◼   ► kid is ready for a leopard skin prompt [TS]

00:39:17 ◼   ► suit well I'm not everybody's ready to [TS]

00:39:19 ◼   ► inherit that story mm-hmm no now you're [TS]

00:39:22 ◼   ► part of the legacy now yeah there are a [TS]

00:39:24 ◼   ► lot of stories that you know that that [TS]

00:39:26 ◼   ► you hand over to some young person and [TS]

00:39:28 ◼   ► go and now you inherit the story and you [TS]

00:39:31 ◼   ► can cut a salami with your hands oblate [TS]

00:39:33 ◼   ► I don't think so no you don't you you're [TS]

00:39:36 ◼   ► not gonna do that was bit [TS]

00:39:37 ◼   ► to the wind this is the watch that your [TS]

00:39:39 ◼   ► father your father carried in his anus [TS]

00:39:41 ◼   ► throughout the Hanoi Hilton yeah you [TS]

00:39:44 ◼   ► know you hand that watch over to some [TS]

00:39:45 ◼   ► kid the kids like takes it to a pawn [TS]

00:39:48 ◼   ► shop and get some cash to go to the best [TS]

00:39:51 ◼   ► little whorehouse in Texas or working on [TS]

00:39:53 ◼   ► the counter you send us a little of the [TS]

00:39:55 ◼   ► european girl go back and get it yeah [TS]

00:39:57 ◼   ► exactly you can't you know and then [TS]

00:39:58 ◼   ► Johnny Fontane is going to the bathroom [TS]

00:40:01 ◼   ► mm-hmm I mean the whole thing it could [TS]

00:40:04 ◼   ► have gone a lot of it just to show i'm [TS]

00:40:05 ◼   ► not a hard-hearted man she was the best [TS]

00:40:07 ◼   ► piece of ass I ever had yeah it's not [TS]

00:40:09 ◼   ► it's not a it's a chopper baby you know [TS]

00:40:12 ◼   ► what I mean it's a chopper zeds dead [TS]

00:40:14 ◼   ► baby admiral farragut academy perhaps [TS]

00:40:16 ◼   ► most notable for graduating two of the [TS]

00:40:18 ◼   ► 12 men who walked on the moon you're [TS]

00:40:21 ◼   ► into this alan sharp are you kidding [TS]

00:40:22 ◼   ► alan shepard but pieces are being alan [TS]

00:40:25 ◼   ► shepard how many of these academies work [TS]

00:40:27 ◼   ► there the two is started in New Jersey [TS]

00:40:30 ◼   ► and then transmogrified down into st. [TS]

00:40:32 ◼   ► Pete I think st. Pete is the only extant [TS]

00:40:34 ◼   ► one at this point you guys get Alan [TS]

00:40:37 ◼   ► Shepard and you got ya Charles Duke 1972 [TS]

00:40:41 ◼   ► became the tenth person to walk on the [TS]

00:40:43 ◼   ► moon as part of Apollo 16 yeah Chuck [TS]

00:40:46 ◼   ► Duke of 16 Chuck Duke you got William [TS]

00:40:49 ◼   ► colpa who defected to the Nazis in World [TS]

00:40:51 ◼   ► War two uh let's see you got Richard [TS]

00:40:55 ◼   ► mark Marcinko author and former [TS]

00:40:58 ◼   ► commanding officer of US naval Navy SEAL [TS]

00:41:01 ◼   ► Team two still came to ya we get Casper [TS]

00:41:05 ◼   ► Robert Van Dien who was in starship [TS]

00:41:07 ◼   ► troopers okay all right so not actually [TS]

00:41:11 ◼   ► in the military but but well I mean you [TS]

00:41:13 ◼   ► know it would kapiti work she could come [TS]

00:41:15 ◼   ► in descending order Alan Shepard is the [TS]

00:41:17 ◼   ► first famous alumni I'm the penultimate [TS]

00:41:19 ◼   ► one you know I was the only one below me [TS]

00:41:22 ◼   ► is philanthropist and business leader f [TS]

00:41:24 ◼   ► Chris Nelson philanthropist and business [TS]

00:41:27 ◼   ► leader F Chris Nelson now see he's [TS]

00:41:29 ◼   ► almost no see no no I don't know him you [TS]

00:41:33 ◼   ► got to oh look at this you've got [TS]

00:41:34 ◼   ► animator Andy Andy lucky went there and [TS]

00:41:38 ◼   ► be lucky and he lucky famous animator [TS]

00:41:40 ◼   ► famous animator yeah the rest is I'm not [TS]

00:41:43 ◼   ► so sure about singer and actor Eduardo [TS]

00:41:44 ◼   ► adoni mm-hmm [TS]

00:41:47 ◼   ► he's a singer and an actor I you know I [TS]

00:41:49 ◼   ► repla stephen stills so if this well see [TS]

00:41:53 ◼   ► you're in the show business yeah but if [TS]

00:41:55 ◼   ► this uh if the I asked you if the school [TS]

00:41:57 ◼   ► is a pipeline to Annapolis and I'm [TS]

00:41:59 ◼   ► beginning to think hell yes it I think [TS]

00:42:02 ◼   ► it was yeah you know yeah ship is only [TS]

00:42:06 ◼   ► as good as its captain alan shepard [TS]

00:42:09 ◼   ► didn't like didn't come from like a like [TS]

00:42:13 ◼   ► Tampa community college Allen's Oxford [TS]

00:42:17 ◼   ► no he wanted what's the one in New [TS]

00:42:20 ◼   ► Jersey Alan Shepard hails from Derry New [TS]

00:42:23 ◼   ► Hampshire mmm Dairy Dairy you know that [TS]

00:42:27 ◼   ► he ban on nine th on yeah yeah yeah I [TS]

00:42:30 ◼   ► remember no I celebrated his entire [TS]

00:42:31 ◼   ► catalog um I I I think Derry New [TS]

00:42:38 ◼   ► Hampshire was probably one of those [TS]

00:42:39 ◼   ► towns that was named during a time when [TS]

00:42:41 ◼   ► you named a town aspirationally okay [TS]

00:42:44 ◼   ► like you know when you named a town like [TS]

00:42:47 ◼   ► gold strike right or like you know [TS]

00:42:50 ◼   ► silver vein Nevada okay sure and and and [TS]

00:42:55 ◼   ► lamp sure at the time good schools [TS]

00:42:58 ◼   ► Florida yeah good schools good school [TS]

00:43:00 ◼   ► Florida what is that town in Florida [TS]

00:43:02 ◼   ► that's called like Jubilee or oh yeah [TS]

00:43:04 ◼   ► Jubilee or no yeah Jubilees the the fake [TS]

00:43:07 ◼   ► community right yeah like freaky town [TS]

00:43:10 ◼   ► freaky town floor yes the places it's [TS]

00:43:13 ◼   ► like this is a Disney ish community yeah [TS]

00:43:15 ◼   ► yeah yeah Disney but maybe Christian tea [TS]

00:43:17 ◼   ► yeah tubidy new hampshire new hampshire [TS]

00:43:22 ◼   ► that was uh that was like that was the [TS]

00:43:24 ◼   ► aspirate like what are we gonna name our [TS]

00:43:26 ◼   ► town what is it dary isn't that in [TS]

00:43:28 ◼   ► Ireland oh well how's it spelled de rry [TS]

00:43:32 ◼   ► o'deary I thought it was spelled dai ry [TS]

00:43:35 ◼   ► we're gonna try and attract some retiree [TS]

00:43:37 ◼   ► cows yeah or just like hey come to our [TS]

00:43:40 ◼   ► town we have milk butter t'en right [TS]

00:43:43 ◼   ► butter two milks burger and it's not you [TS]

00:43:46 ◼   ► know this isn't a gold rush per se no [TS]

00:43:49 ◼   ► but cheese never goes out of style [TS]

00:43:51 ◼   ► that's true that's the new cat shirts [TS]

00:43:54 ◼   ► looking right like a silver veins gonna [TS]

00:43:57 ◼   ► run dry though the load is [TS]

00:43:59 ◼   ► driving a calm cheesehead yeah the old [TS]

00:44:01 ◼   ► man of the cheese Rock I heard fell off [TS]

00:44:03 ◼   ► then part of the old man fall off of the [TS]

00:44:05 ◼   ► old man of cheese Rock though he fall [TS]

00:44:08 ◼   ► off his eyebrows fellow New Hampshire [TS]

00:44:11 ◼   ► rock face rock face uh I'm sure he's the [TS]

00:44:17 ◼   ► old man of the mountain known as your [TS]

00:44:19 ◼   ► rocks bitch made the right faces fell [TS]

00:44:21 ◼   ► off he's still on the quarter but his [TS]

00:44:23 ◼   ► face slid off the cliff today were you [TS]

00:44:26 ◼   ► where the old man I see I I had a lady [TS]

00:44:27 ◼   ► friend one of my serial monogamy was [TS]

00:44:30 ◼   ► with a woman from contoocook New [TS]

00:44:33 ◼   ► Hampshire so she's one who taught me [TS]

00:44:35 ◼   ► about the old man of the mountain oh [TS]

00:44:36 ◼   ► this is really sad old man on the rock [TS]

00:44:38 ◼   ► face and that old man is me uh go ahead [TS]

00:44:46 ◼   ► go ahead caller yes I'll marry longtime [TS]

00:44:49 ◼   ► listener first-time stone face yeah it's [TS]

00:44:51 ◼   ► complicated cuz you know you want to [TS]

00:44:53 ◼   ► name something it's like when you name a [TS]

00:44:54 ◼   ► kid it's very very complicated stuff [TS]

00:44:57 ◼   ► because then you know you want one does [TS]

00:44:58 ◼   ► not really good through this and so much [TS]

00:45:00 ◼   ► exactly like so many things in life it [TS]

00:45:02 ◼   ► doesn't really happen until it happens [TS]

00:45:04 ◼   ► yeah cuz what happens it really really [TS]

00:45:05 ◼   ► happens it does they stand there and [TS]

00:45:07 ◼   ► they say what's the name of this child I [TS]

00:45:09 ◼   ► have to write it on this piece of paper [TS]

00:45:10 ◼   ► exactly well this is you know it's the [TS]

00:45:12 ◼   ► same way that that all the best you know [TS]

00:45:13 ◼   ► experts on what to do with a child or [TS]

00:45:15 ◼   ► people who have never had a child you [TS]

00:45:18 ◼   ► know they know it all but when you said [TS]

00:45:20 ◼   ► that I do not leave the hospital with my [TS]

00:45:22 ◼   ► child until I told them the name of the [TS]

00:45:24 ◼   ► child see that's the government that's [TS]

00:45:26 ◼   ► the guy that is that true not really [TS]

00:45:28 ◼   ► isn't thing too is that a hoop I'm sorry [TS]

00:45:32 ◼   ► I apologize isn't that the Semitic law [TS]

00:45:36 ◼   ► isn't there a thing like you can't name [TS]

00:45:37 ◼   ► it you can't name it you're not supposed [TS]

00:45:40 ◼   ► to name a kid before it's born cuz [TS]

00:45:42 ◼   ► that's big fat Jewish luck right they [TS]

00:45:44 ◼   ► don't have a name in a certain number of [TS]

00:45:46 ◼   ► days or you gotta return it is that how [TS]

00:45:47 ◼   ► it works you have to name a child before [TS]

00:45:49 ◼   ► you roll a set of dice okay it's like [TS]

00:45:52 ◼   ► it's like a nominal saving throw yeah [TS]

00:45:55 ◼   ► right like you're not when he cited [TS]

00:45:56 ◼   ► dreidel and if it comes up Kentucky you [TS]

00:46:00 ◼   ► get all the gab don't look out a window [TS]

00:46:02 ◼   ► after sunset okay before you name the [TS]

00:46:06 ◼   ► child unless you light a candle and [TS]

00:46:09 ◼   ► drink a cup of milk [TS]

00:46:12 ◼   ► I think that's right in the Torah yep [TS]

00:46:14 ◼   ► yep yep yep it's why they don't eat [TS]

00:46:15 ◼   ► shrimp hmm presented pussies Morrissey's [TS]

00:46:18 ◼   ► haha um so what ya what name is hard we [TS]

00:46:23 ◼   ► went around and around and I tried to be [TS]

00:46:25 ◼   ► scientific about it and so I came up [TS]

00:46:28 ◼   ► with my first pick for name was the name [TS]

00:46:32 ◼   ► that I had somewhat arbitrarily decided [TS]

00:46:35 ◼   ► was the best name because it's a pretty [TS]

00:46:37 ◼   ► neutral name but best of all it is a [TS]

00:46:40 ◼   ► name from which many many names could be [TS]

00:46:43 ◼   ► derived if you have a preference over [TS]

00:46:45 ◼   ► the Prime name ilysm Elizabeth don't [TS]

00:46:49 ◼   ► tell you this no but Elizabeth is the [TS]

00:46:51 ◼   ► ultimate girls name because he can call [TS]

00:46:53 ◼   ► her hey good for me yeah that was my [TS]

00:46:55 ◼   ► first pick out a second he's got Beth [TS]

00:46:59 ◼   ► you could be uh you you could hopefully [TS]

00:47:02 ◼   ► be practically anything yeah Beth you [TS]

00:47:04 ◼   ► can be Liz you can be you know my cousin [TS]

00:47:07 ◼   ► her name is Elizabeth we call her Libby [TS]

00:47:09 ◼   ► oh maybe you could be a Betty but here's [TS]

00:47:13 ◼   ► the thing and this is the way it works [TS]

00:47:14 ◼   ► when you have a partner it got nixed for [TS]

00:47:17 ◼   ► one reason and it's a good reason have [TS]

00:47:19 ◼   ► you ever met anybody good named Liz be [TS]

00:47:24 ◼   ► honest be honest one of the redheads [TS]

00:47:27 ◼   ► that chisel is that figured in one of [TS]

00:47:31 ◼   ► these earlier stories that I was telling [TS]

00:47:33 ◼   ► today uh her name was Lynn okay then [TS]

00:47:36 ◼   ► I'll just stipulate that maybe not all [TS]

00:47:38 ◼   ► not all Liz's but I'm just gonna say [TS]

00:47:40 ◼   ► almost every liz is bad also jonathan [TS]

00:47:43 ◼   ► coulton sister-in-law who sort of [TS]

00:47:46 ◼   ► doubles as a sister wife her name is [TS]

00:47:49 ◼   ► also list okay so not all Liz's but I'm [TS]

00:47:52 ◼   ► sure says hey listen not all this but my [TS]

00:47:54 ◼   ► lady friend who you know got at least an [TS]

00:47:57 ◼   ► equal vote Ecklie had that you know she [TS]

00:47:59 ◼   ► gets naming rights yeah you're not gonna [TS]

00:48:01 ◼   ► name a child over the wishes of the [TS]

00:48:03 ◼   ► mother no no no uh she had been pseudo [TS]

00:48:07 ◼   ► bullied by Al is in her youth because [TS]

00:48:10 ◼   ► most Liz's let's be honest most Lissa's [TS]

00:48:12 ◼   ► are bullies yeah they're a little if you [TS]

00:48:14 ◼   ► if you're gonna avoid somebody at school [TS]

00:48:16 ◼   ► and it's a girl because she's gonna beat [TS]

00:48:18 ◼   ► you up by your locker mmm you know [TS]

00:48:20 ◼   ► saying live yeah i'ma give you I'm gonna [TS]

00:48:22 ◼   ► give you three two one so it's a Liz [TS]

00:48:25 ◼   ► no barrier they're tough moyers I have a [TS]

00:48:30 ◼   ► soft spot for Morris though so but the [TS]

00:48:32 ◼   ► thing is the name that you chose for [TS]

00:48:33 ◼   ► your child is extraordinary it's just [TS]

00:48:35 ◼   ► it's it's a little bit on trend in a way [TS]

00:48:38 ◼   ► I didn't precisely realize because of [TS]

00:48:39 ◼   ► course I went to websites and looked all [TS]

00:48:41 ◼   ► these things up and she has what i would [TS]

00:48:43 ◼   ► call an old lady named yeah richer kind [TS]

00:48:46 ◼   ► of one of the nice ones not like mod or [TS]

00:48:48 ◼   ► yeah Murgatroyd hers yeah burghdroid [TS]

00:48:51 ◼   ► emergence book thanks to Murgatroyd even [TS]

00:48:57 ◼   ► but then when I tell her why I like that [TS]

00:48:59 ◼   ► name like I kind of fall short oh my god [TS]

00:49:00 ◼   ► is this this is really good Beal song [TS]

00:49:02 ◼   ► about a horribly lonely woman and others [TS]

00:49:06 ◼   ► you know there's the lady in help you [TS]

00:49:08 ◼   ► know Eleanor Braun and you know zona [TS]

00:49:10 ◼   ► Roosevelt who kind of look like a statue [TS]

00:49:12 ◼   ► of a horse but she was a great lady she [TS]

00:49:14 ◼   ► was great lady there are some there are [TS]

00:49:17 ◼   ► also some Eleanor's in our larger circle [TS]

00:49:21 ◼   ► right a couple of our friends named [TS]

00:49:22 ◼   ► their shot yes yes I share I did not [TS]

00:49:26 ◼   ► know I did not know speaking of our [TS]

00:49:28 ◼   ► mutual friend I did not know that he had [TS]

00:49:30 ◼   ► an Eleanor yeah well and also other [TS]

00:49:32 ◼   ► Theophilus right yeah that's right but [TS]

00:49:34 ◼   ► there was another friend uh who is a you [TS]

00:49:38 ◼   ► know who is a former former religious [TS]

00:49:41 ◼   ► rock musician what now now secular rock [TS]

00:49:45 ◼   ► musician who also has a daughter oh come [TS]

00:49:47 ◼   ► on yeah so i often get in situations [TS]

00:49:50 ◼   ► really yeah and she's the same age she's [TS]

00:49:55 ◼   ► do exactly the same age as your to [TS]

00:49:56 ◼   ► Jonathan that's a pretty name yeah it's [TS]

00:49:59 ◼   ► a beautiful name but I'm often in [TS]

00:50:01 ◼   ► situations where i am socializing with [TS]

00:50:03 ◼   ► one of my friends and the daughter [TS]

00:50:05 ◼   ► arrives and the thing is all three of [TS]

00:50:07 ◼   ► these young ladies yours and the one and [TS]

00:50:11 ◼   ► then the other they're all like among my [TS]

00:50:14 ◼   ► favorite people in the world right [TS]

00:50:15 ◼   ► they're all between a you know between [TS]

00:50:17 ◼   ► eight and ten or we stop and they're [TS]

00:50:20 ◼   ► just there you know three of my favorite [TS]

00:50:22 ◼   ► people and so I'm on confronted with a [TS]

00:50:25 ◼   ► situation where a young lady will walk [TS]

00:50:27 ◼   ► into the room and I will say to myself [TS]

00:50:29 ◼   ► Eleanor but can this truly be is you [TS]

00:50:36 ◼   ► know I second-guess whether or not [TS]

00:50:38 ◼   ► it's one of the Eleanor's uh sure you're [TS]

00:50:42 ◼   ► reaching that age yeah well and also [TS]

00:50:44 ◼   ► because there are a couple of [TS]

00:50:46 ◼   ► Madeleine's including one Madeline who [TS]

00:50:50 ◼   ► was named for another prominent Madeline [TS]

00:50:53 ◼   ► that's it but he also the other problem [TS]

00:50:56 ◼   ► with being a Madeleine as I have learned [TS]

00:50:58 ◼   ► is this is something that my uh my [TS]

00:51:00 ◼   ► friend Marco Arment what does he call it [TS]

00:51:02 ◼   ► he calls it the snap to grid problem [TS]

00:51:04 ◼   ► where if you have a name that sounds [TS]

00:51:06 ◼   ► like a much better known name or if you [TS]

00:51:09 ◼   ► have a name that sounds like a name [TS]

00:51:11 ◼   ► that's very familiar to someone else [TS]

00:51:12 ◼   ► there's a lot of people who have names [TS]

00:51:14 ◼   ► like me like like I'm always a Marvin or [TS]

00:51:16 ◼   ► am L or something a track Markham I have [TS]

00:51:19 ◼   ► an unusual name Madame not my Madeleine [TS]

00:51:21 ◼   ► for much of her life would get called [TS]

00:51:23 ◼   ► Natalie really yeah because yeah but [TS]

00:51:27 ◼   ► that's the snap to grid problem you [TS]

00:51:29 ◼   ► don't have this because you have you [TS]

00:51:30 ◼   ► have a canonical name I do I think your [TS]

00:51:32 ◼   ► names in the Torah I got the shrimp it [TS]

00:51:35 ◼   ► absolutely is it absolutely is in the [TS]

00:51:37 ◼   ► Torah it goes all the way back my there [TS]

00:51:39 ◼   ► was God and then there was uh there was [TS]

00:51:42 ◼   ► Adam and Eve there was a sooz law [TS]

00:51:43 ◼   ► Methuselah their Shadrach Meshach [TS]

00:51:46 ◼   ► Abednego but John was like right up [TS]

00:51:49 ◼   ► there right after between supremely [TS]

00:51:51 ◼   ► John's back then is probably really [TS]

00:51:53 ◼   ► confusing and they say what is the John [TS]

00:51:55 ◼   ► of which you speak he says John of the [TS]

00:51:57 ◼   ► the guy used to live near the burning [TS]

00:51:59 ◼   ► bush like John be John be the guy with [TS]

00:52:01 ◼   ► the sloop oh good point but I've always [TS]

00:52:05 ◼   ► been building anything he took any ate [TS]

00:52:07 ◼   ► up all of my corn that's right that's [TS]

00:52:09 ◼   ► right know what it means worst trip I've [TS]

00:52:11 ◼   ► ever been on that really didn't you then [TS]

00:52:13 ◼   ► he took any ate up all on my corn yeah [TS]

00:52:16 ◼   ► well what does it mean John when you go [TS]

00:52:18 ◼   ► out on a sloop you get you get issued a [TS]

00:52:20 ◼   ► certain amount of course okay so you got [TS]

00:52:22 ◼   ► a fox yeah Chisholm and this is on me of [TS]

00:52:25 ◼   ► corn and you gotta cross now how do you [TS]

00:52:27 ◼   ► how do you do it it's one of the things [TS]

00:52:28 ◼   ► about being on a sloop and a lot of [TS]

00:52:30 ◼   ► people haven't been on asleep so they [TS]

00:52:31 ◼   ► don't know about the corn yeah get on [TS]

00:52:33 ◼   ► the corn and then you're out for you [TS]

00:52:35 ◼   ► know you're out for a trip which is what [TS]

00:52:37 ◼   ► you describe how you describe going on a [TS]

00:52:39 ◼   ► sloop let's call the trip so so it [TS]

00:52:43 ◼   ► depends you could be you could have one [TS]

00:52:44 ◼   ► trip you can have two trips you could be [TS]

00:52:46 ◼   ► on a three trips yes three trips loop [TS]

00:52:48 ◼   ► okay and the thing is you only get a [TS]

00:52:51 ◼   ► certain amount of corn so if someone [TS]

00:52:52 ◼   ► else eats up all your corn yeah I mean [TS]

00:52:55 ◼   ► well I think everybody gets if you're [TS]

00:52:57 ◼   ► gonna start out it's a sort of like yeah [TS]

00:52:59 ◼   ► when you're learning sailing at em with [TS]

00:53:00 ◼   ► Farragut you know you start out on a [TS]

00:53:02 ◼   ► little puffer you work your way up you [TS]

00:53:03 ◼   ► starting to sleep John a sloop John B is [TS]

00:53:05 ◼   ► your last chance you go from a pupper to [TS]

00:53:07 ◼   ► a sloop John a so the poor cook he [TS]

00:53:10 ◼   ► caught the fits he offended away all my [TS]

00:53:12 ◼   ► grits see that's what I thought any ate [TS]

00:53:15 ◼   ► up all of my corn right well how do you [TS]

00:53:17 ◼   ► make grits your perm unified die totally [TS]

00:53:21 ◼   ► from herself John bina nobody's gonna [TS]

00:53:25 ◼   ► freak nobody's gonna say oh it's sloop [TS]

00:53:27 ◼   ► Bobby B or sloop uh I'm trying to see I [TS]

00:53:31 ◼   ► can't even do a snap to grid on your [TS]

00:53:32 ◼   ► name because it's the canonical name [TS]

00:53:33 ◼   ► well so John B let's say the Sun follow [TS]

00:53:36 ◼   ► me Jonathan John Barleycorn john [TS]

00:53:39 ◼   ► barleycorn musta shitty live or die I [TS]

00:53:41 ◼   ► never remember John John Barleycorn as [TS]

00:53:44 ◼   ► he was born old well is that exactly [TS]

00:53:47 ◼   ► that's a Scott McCoy has a song about [TS]

00:53:50 ◼   ► that alright garlic we must live isn't [TS]

00:53:53 ◼   ► he referencing a song by the fall I [TS]

00:53:55 ◼   ► think oh I I think there's something [TS]

00:53:57 ◼   ► that goes John Barleycorn Maas died I [TS]

00:53:59 ◼   ► think Scott McCoy he takes it he turns [TS]

00:54:01 ◼   ► it he makes it into john barleycorn must [TS]

00:54:03 ◼   ► live yeah John Barleycorn is a way of [TS]

00:54:05 ◼   ► describing a sour babies okay it's a [TS]

00:54:09 ◼   ► kind of cockney rhyming slang it's like [TS]

00:54:10 ◼   ► ooh and you want to see my wife you say [TS]

00:54:12 ◼   ► John Barleycorn yeah that's right John [TS]

00:54:14 ◼   ► Barleycorn here they come they're my [TS]

00:54:16 ◼   ► fiddles and bits ixnay ixnay on the on [TS]

00:54:20 ◼   ► the X talk on the X sock here comes John [TS]

00:54:24 ◼   ► Barleycorn the thing is I feel in my [TS]

00:54:26 ◼   ► life that I'm caught between Eleanor's [TS]

00:54:28 ◼   ► and Madeline's pelipper speckle with the [TS]

00:54:30 ◼   ► whole truck yeah well you know it's [TS]

00:54:33 ◼   ► funny I mistake one for the other in my [TS]

00:54:35 ◼   ► own house which i think is you know [TS]

00:54:36 ◼   ► somewhat normal dropping a lot of metal [TS]

00:54:38 ◼   ► bits these days I got to be honest with [TS]

00:54:39 ◼   ► you Michael Latta mental bits yeah and [TS]

00:54:42 ◼   ► but uh but also frequently I'm trying to [TS]

00:54:47 ◼   ► think which one happens more often is [TS]

00:54:49 ◼   ► people will refer to my daughter as bad [TS]

00:54:52 ◼   ► by my wife's name yeah [TS]

00:54:54 ◼   ► that happens well because yeah right in [TS]

00:54:58 ◼   ► a way Eleanor seems like an older name [TS]

00:55:00 ◼   ► in Madeline but you know here's the [TS]

00:55:02 ◼   ► funny thing now and this is you know [TS]

00:55:03 ◼   ► this is this is the way the stuff goes [TS]

00:55:04 ◼   ► you think you're ahead of the game you [TS]

00:55:06 ◼   ► go and they say oh like show me the [TS]

00:55:08 ◼   ► rankings in the Social Security charts [TS]

00:55:10 ◼   ► and show me like you know right but [TS]

00:55:12 ◼   ► everybody's looking at the same way [TS]

00:55:14 ◼   ► exactly right Oh suddenly everybody's [TS]

00:55:16 ◼   ► name Latricia Shawn Trell you know us or [TS]

00:55:19 ◼   ► our jean-luc morale or any other kind of [TS]

00:55:21 ◼   ► mushroom based name that that's a very [TS]

00:55:23 ◼   ► common thing so I think not now here's [TS]

00:55:26 ◼   ► the funny thing my daughter's class 23 [TS]

00:55:29 ◼   ► kids three different Aiden's well now [TS]

00:55:33 ◼   ► let me ask you this of the 23 kids does [TS]

00:55:35 ◼   ► a single one of them have what we would [TS]

00:55:37 ◼   ► have described in the 70s and 80s as a [TS]

00:55:40 ◼   ► normal name oh good question are there [TS]

00:55:44 ◼   ► any Paul's Peters given our neighborhood [TS]

00:55:47 ◼   ► mm-hmm he said archly there are I would [TS]

00:55:51 ◼   ► say it's more common for a boy to have a [TS]

00:55:54 ◼   ► normal name most of the girls have some [TS]

00:55:56 ◼   ► kind of a wackadoo name yeah I think its [TS]

00:55:59 ◼   ► more common you still you still you [TS]

00:56:01 ◼   ► still get it but like some of them have [TS]

00:56:02 ◼   ► like I don't say to him I she's not talk [TS]

00:56:03 ◼   ► about other people's kids but give us a [TS]

00:56:05 ◼   ► sturdy Irish name for this kid yeah like [TS]

00:56:09 ◼   ► Sheamus you actually she goes to school [TS]

00:56:11 ◼   ► to Sheamus yeah and she has a shame if [TS]

00:56:13 ◼   ► she has a Kian she has just lots of like [TS]

00:56:15 ◼   ► Irish kids with big faces they're the [TS]

00:56:17 ◼   ► best yeah because they're their father [TS]

00:56:19 ◼   ► works at the fire station that's right [TS]

00:56:21 ◼   ► then taking all the factories down the [TS]

00:56:24 ◼   ► graduations hang on the wall that's [TS]

00:56:25 ◼   ► right that's right a bit if it weren't [TS]

00:56:27 ◼   ► for the nibs being so good at building [TS]

00:56:29 ◼   ► ships we'd still have the funny Hedwig [TS]

00:56:32 ◼   ► Xiwen bubbles has a hoppin your horn [TS]

00:56:35 ◼   ► must live yes there are some I mean I [TS]

00:56:42 ◼   ► don't want you know this is an old bit [TS]

00:56:44 ◼   ► of mine and I've got to stop doing it [TS]

00:56:45 ◼   ► because it's like a tattoo like once [TS]

00:56:47 ◼   ► you've named your kid even if it's a [TS]

00:56:49 ◼   ► stupid fucking dumb name like that's the [TS]

00:56:51 ◼   ► kid to kid and that's their name and [TS]

00:56:53 ◼   ► gather broke it you want to make fun of [TS]

00:56:55 ◼   ► the parents for like making a name that [TS]

00:56:57 ◼   ► you have to spell this is my main thing [TS]

00:56:59 ◼   ► and I we were a little bit you know ours [TS]

00:57:02 ◼   ► requires a little bit of spilling if you [TS]

00:57:03 ◼   ► aren't familiar with the name but it's [TS]

00:57:04 ◼   ► not that hard but a name that you like a [TS]

00:57:06 ◼   ► good Jennifer like or something like I [TS]

00:57:08 ◼   ► namely [TS]

00:57:08 ◼   ► like have to spell like robbie rist [TS]

00:57:10 ◼   ► right like I look like a robber tryst [TS]

00:57:13 ◼   ► with 2 w's right right right are my [TS]

00:57:17 ◼   ► daughter's name has a name that has [TS]

00:57:19 ◼   ► three spellings yes and so we've got a [TS]

00:57:23 ◼   ► snap to grid problem because it's very [TS]

00:57:25 ◼   ► close to like for example Dan's [TS]

00:57:27 ◼   ► daughter's real name right dan has [TS]

00:57:30 ◼   ► renamed his daughter after a spider-man [TS]

00:57:32 ◼   ► character but she does have another name [TS]

00:57:34 ◼   ► that's very similar to yours yes and [TS]

00:57:36 ◼   ► also it's very confusing to people who [TS]

00:57:38 ◼   ► are used to gendered names with a with a [TS]

00:57:43 ◼   ► vowel with the evidence and fire yeah [TS]

00:57:44 ◼   ► yeah so so there's sometimes a kind of [TS]

00:57:48 ◼   ► like do you mean blank instead of blank [TS]

00:57:52 ◼   ► and then you have to say like no it's [TS]

00:57:54 ◼   ► sorry it's a different kind of thing [TS]

00:57:56 ◼   ► it's coming from a different zone [TS]

00:57:58 ◼   ► shouldn't into george sand well you know [TS]

00:58:01 ◼   ► I was just sitting here thinking what [TS]

00:58:03 ◼   ► first of all yes it's an awesome name [TS]

00:58:05 ◼   ► for a little girl just neighbor George [TS]

00:58:06 ◼   ► Sand well I could have named her [TS]

00:58:08 ◼   ► mcgeorge which is I think one of the [TS]

00:58:10 ◼   ► great name george bundy mcgeorge right [TS]

00:58:12 ◼   ► George mcgeorge sounds a little bit like [TS]

00:58:14 ◼   ► a little got a little curious george [TS]

00:58:15 ◼   ► vibe to it what about latouche latouche [TS]

00:58:18 ◼   ► that's that's different from Lagrange [TS]

00:58:21 ◼   ► now if you had twins latouche in [TS]

00:58:22 ◼   ► LaGrange would be adorable and now i [TS]

00:58:28 ◼   ► wanna be a mistaken what I am wondering [TS]

00:58:32 ◼   ► is what's the who when was the last time [TS]

00:58:35 ◼   ► you met a Meredith I have I know [TS]

00:58:40 ◼   ► Meredith she works at Genentech she is [TS]

00:58:44 ◼   ► the no x specialist of a guy that you [TS]

00:58:48 ◼   ► know is Genentech a genetics technical [TS]

00:58:52 ◼   ► company bing aha they're big they're big [TS]

00:58:56 ◼   ► thank you can't get one past me [TS]

00:58:58 ◼   ► Genentech Genentech King what if you [TS]

00:59:01 ◼   ► tamed it what if you named a little girl [TS]

00:59:03 ◼   ► Genentech call heavy adorable right [TS]

00:59:05 ◼   ► except spelt at j e a me2 do here's I [TS]

00:59:11 ◼   ► usually ask it so look like immensely [TS]

00:59:14 ◼   ► imagine the names Janine and teach you [TS]

00:59:17 ◼   ► Janine and teach but you're hyphenated [TS]

00:59:19 ◼   ► and [TS]

00:59:20 ◼   ► you do man the people car genentech yeah [TS]

00:59:22 ◼   ► it's pronounced you doing it it's from [TS]

00:59:23 ◼   ► the french haha contact my daughter [TS]

00:59:28 ◼   ► Genentech Genentech yeah but then like [TS]

00:59:32 ◼   ► so you have like Bernstein Bernstein [TS]

00:59:34 ◼   ► yeah sure wells which is the first bear [TS]

00:59:38 ◼   ► the Torah John why is it such a big deal [TS]

00:59:40 ◼   ► to beastie nurse Stein why I honest [TS]

00:59:43 ◼   ► question as they say on twitter honest [TS]

00:59:45 ◼   ► honest question what was it was that a [TS]

00:59:47 ◼   ► big deal I get it I take that I feel [TS]

00:59:50 ◼   ► like that's more than just here's how my [TS]

00:59:52 ◼   ► name is pronounced is there soon like [TS]

00:59:55 ◼   ► peculiarly jewy about making sure it's [TS]

00:59:57 ◼   ► pronounced a certain way like you don't [TS]

00:59:59 ◼   ► want it to sound over [TS]

00:59:59 ◼   ► want it to sound over [TS]

01:00:00 ◼   ► medic or under Semitic well this is a [TS]

01:00:02 ◼   ► very very very good question that has [TS]

01:00:04 ◼   ► never really been posed to me even [TS]

01:00:06 ◼   ► though it is so you've seen it though [TS]

01:00:08 ◼   ► right well it's it's it's absolutely [TS]

01:00:11 ◼   ► like why do they not put a dot on the [TS]

01:00:13 ◼   ► top of USB cables that says this is the [TS]

01:00:16 ◼   ► top sort of like the diaeresis when New [TS]

01:00:18 ◼   ► Yorker says coordinating coordinator [TS]

01:00:21 ◼   ► coordinating cumin it lubed herb I feel [TS]

01:00:26 ◼   ► like that the knowing what I know which [TS]

01:00:28 ◼   ► is not very much I'm gonna say that the [TS]

01:00:30 ◼   ► Steen Stein pronunciation thing is [TS]

01:00:34 ◼   ► either an austro-hungarian versus like [TS]

01:00:38 ◼   ► Prussian thing mon I did not have that [TS]

01:00:42 ◼   ► in my bracket good right or it is a UH [TS]

01:00:46 ◼   ► it is a coming from the east like Russia [TS]

01:00:50 ◼   ► Belarus arrays you ain't Ukraine's I'll [TS]

01:00:55 ◼   ► Ukraine thing right where it comes in [TS]

01:00:58 ◼   ► and then the assimilated germanized Jews [TS]

01:01:02 ◼   ► had a one-way MMA or it may be I don't [TS]

01:01:07 ◼   ► think it's an Ellis Island thing I think [TS]

01:01:10 ◼   ► it I think it's before that but this is [TS]

01:01:12 ◼   ► a great question and I bet you one of [TS]

01:01:14 ◼   ► our listeners is going to say one way or [TS]

01:01:17 ◼   ► the other something definitive well hear [TS]

01:01:19 ◼   ► a voice coming up from the well actually [TS]

01:01:20 ◼   ► yeah someone is gonna something's gonna [TS]

01:01:23 ◼   ► say here's the simple explanation for [TS]

01:01:25 ◼   ► this but I've never heard it explained [TS]

01:01:28 ◼   ► and it always is a question right die [TS]

01:01:31 ◼   ► norstein comes from the German meaning [TS]

01:01:34 ◼   ► stone or rock right get Stein you also [TS]

01:01:37 ◼   ► got what height is head right right like [TS]

01:01:41 ◼   ► einheit that I died right einheit me do [TS]

01:01:44 ◼   ► one head you've got the die toten hosen [TS]

01:01:47 ◼   ► die toten huh so which means the the [TS]

01:01:50 ◼   ► pantyhose of death okay he's a cat but [TS]

01:01:52 ◼   ► yeah kappa right was real you've got [TS]

01:01:55 ◼   ► what are some other ones there some [TS]

01:01:56 ◼   ► other oh you know what you got your wife [TS]

01:01:57 ◼   ► he got vice and got what's the other one [TS]

01:02:00 ◼   ► I was the opposite of Vice you've got uh [TS]

01:02:04 ◼   ► shoot shoes shoes [TS]

01:02:06 ◼   ► shoosh shoes you got should shuts shit [TS]

01:02:12 ◼   ► novotel vices white oh I know this I [TS]

01:02:15 ◼   ► know this oh it's killing me what is [TS]

01:02:17 ◼   ► black in German oh it's a short Schwartz [TS]

01:02:21 ◼   ► Schwartz and Weiss shorts and white [TS]

01:02:23 ◼   ► short shorts and white stick yeah hey [TS]

01:02:26 ◼   ► jay ellis island yeah wold love all [TS]

01:02:30 ◼   ► walls is forest oh really bald um so the [TS]

01:02:36 ◼   ► black forest is the Schwarzwald man [TS]

01:02:39 ◼   ► Germans a crazy language but it is cool [TS]

01:02:41 ◼   ► that you can mostly figure out what it [TS]

01:02:43 ◼   ► means what is ver moch mean I mean I [TS]

01:02:45 ◼   ► know I know what would it represent that [TS]

01:02:47 ◼   ► means that the regular German army as [TS]

01:02:48 ◼   ► they say right yeah was the word mean [TS]

01:02:51 ◼   ► but I'm just looking up I guess yeah I [TS]

01:02:53 ◼   ► guess mocked means uh Michelle Michelle [TS]

01:02:57 ◼   ► ya mean so they make 10 copies make war [TS]

01:03:00 ◼   ► i bet it means make war o ver moch very [TS]

01:03:02 ◼   ► locked i'll bet to make it may make [TS]

01:03:06 ◼   ► their make their mock shall not shall [TS]

01:03:08 ◼   ► make war i like that if there's not a if [TS]

01:03:11 ◼   ► there's not a German word for make war [TS]

01:03:13 ◼   ► i'm going to eat the hat that I'm [TS]

01:03:15 ◼   ► looking at right now this is thats a [TS]

01:03:16 ◼   ► hoot the hat says chick magnet on it I'm [TS]

01:03:19 ◼   ► gonna eat it if there's not a German [TS]

01:03:21 ◼   ► which can make more their mock I'm sure [TS]

01:03:27 ◼   ► you've been hearing about it have you [TS]

01:03:28 ◼   ► had a chance to look at the Luftwaffe [TS]

01:03:31 ◼   ► Luftwaffe air lift his air yeah like a [TS]

01:03:35 ◼   ► like a loof balloon it's the woof gang [TS]

01:03:37 ◼   ► of the air okay waffa waffa means i [TS]

01:03:40 ◼   ► don't well i don't know what waffen [TS]

01:03:42 ◼   ► loose lufthansa is x that means the last [TS]

01:03:45 ◼   ► heist as long as you don't get caught [TS]

01:03:46 ◼   ► mmm oh right Samuel Jackson's want to [TS]

01:03:50 ◼   ► screw that one a black people don't know [TS]

01:03:51 ◼   ► he's the one that screwed that up you [TS]

01:03:52 ◼   ► know it's called a Royale with cheese [TS]

01:03:54 ◼   ► mm-hmm oh yeah right yeah make [TS]

01:03:59 ◼   ► Americanos really didn't move fast he [TS]

01:04:02 ◼   ► didn't have to move faster uh did she [TS]

01:04:04 ◼   ► have you had a chance are you aware of [TS]

01:04:06 ◼   ► the recently released out of translation [TS]

01:04:09 ◼   ► the new book blitzed you certainly have [TS]

01:04:12 ◼   ► heard about this book yes yeah but I'm [TS]

01:04:14 ◼   ► but I'm not aware of the i'm not aware [TS]

01:04:18 ◼   ► the exactly so why don't you [TS]

01:04:20 ◼   ► me the love this it's so it's so [TS]

01:04:22 ◼   ► desperately on the nose for our program [TS]

01:04:24 ◼   ► that we should probably just cut this [TS]

01:04:26 ◼   ► out I would just leave it at this if you [TS]

01:04:28 ◼   ► have the long opportunity you should [TS]

01:04:30 ◼   ► check out a book called blitzed it's [TS]

01:04:32 ◼   ► about the use and abuse systematically [TS]

01:04:34 ◼   ► of drugs in the Third Reich and then [TS]

01:04:37 ◼   ► with special regard to the drugs that [TS]

01:04:38 ◼   ► Hitler specifically got from his crazy [TS]

01:04:40 ◼   ► personal physician oh yeah and in this [TS]

01:04:43 ◼   ► in the short term if you just want a [TS]

01:04:44 ◼   ► shorty i'll send you link to a good [TS]

01:04:46 ◼   ► fresh air interview with the author but [TS]

01:04:48 ◼   ► basically they're giving their giving [TS]

01:04:50 ◼   ► the army uh math twice a day and they [TS]

01:04:55 ◼   ► could they fight for like a week without [TS]

01:04:56 ◼   ► sleeping give your army meth twice day [TS]

01:05:01 ◼   ► this is an adage this is a German adage [TS]

01:05:02 ◼   ► on how to say it in German it's a [TS]

01:05:04 ◼   ► Benjamin Franklin said it here you get [TS]

01:05:05 ◼   ► ready met twice today if you don't know [TS]

01:05:07 ◼   ► what it's for they will bring a present [TS]

01:05:09 ◼   ► pretty small you speaking of which you [TS]

01:05:12 ◼   ► know the French forget you know they [TS]

01:05:13 ◼   ► were issued a wine red wine yeah wine [TS]

01:05:16 ◼   ► and mushrooms and that just goes to show [TS]

01:05:20 ◼   ► that this is a set that guide the beard [TS]

01:05:22 ◼   ► from Miami but you have tired mushrooms [TS]

01:05:27 ◼   ► you're not going to you're not going to [TS]

01:05:29 ◼   ► blitzkrieg on wine and mushrooms of you [TS]

01:05:31 ◼   ► know what I'm saying you're not even you [TS]

01:05:32 ◼   ► you're not even gonna be a little [TS]

01:05:35 ◼   ► defense a wall zut alors no ya know you [TS]

01:05:44 ◼   ► took he took any ate up all my corn the [TS]

01:05:46 ◼   ► thing is the Germans actually have a [TS]

01:05:48 ◼   ► holiday we've talked about before called [TS]

01:05:49 ◼   ► shits infest which is just shooting vest [TS]

01:05:52 ◼   ► it's just respectful where they shoot [TS]

01:05:53 ◼   ► shoot it's a holiday you get it out you [TS]

01:05:57 ◼   ► gettin off school yeah it's a tattoo [TS]

01:05:59 ◼   ► based holiday is there a business is [TS]

01:06:02 ◼   ► there really are a lot of 2 based [TS]

01:06:03 ◼   ► holidays there and a lot of beer ho ho [TS]

01:06:06 ◼   ► well you know you gotta you gotta dance [TS]

01:06:08 ◼   ► with the one that brung you one of the [TS]

01:06:10 ◼   ► interesting things about Germany is of [TS]

01:06:11 ◼   ► course it was the it was the you know [TS]

01:06:14 ◼   ► the cradle of the Reformation and so [TS]

01:06:18 ◼   ► really Merlin there are two germanys [TS]

01:06:20 ◼   ► there's Catholic Germany and there's [TS]

01:06:22 ◼   ► Protestant Germany still and you really [TS]

01:06:25 ◼   ► isn't yeah and as you because of course [TS]

01:06:28 ◼   ► there wasn't to Germany right there [TS]

01:06:31 ◼   ► wasn't really there was a [TS]

01:06:32 ◼   ► twentieth-century thing or late [TS]

01:06:34 ◼   ► 19th century thing right now pretty much [TS]

01:06:36 ◼   ► let's call it a 20th century thing [TS]

01:06:37 ◼   ► because there was a pressure right up [TS]

01:06:39 ◼   ► until you know right up until nineteen [TS]

01:06:41 ◼   ► twenty when I was playing diplomacy at [TS]

01:06:42 ◼   ► admiral farragut academy there was all [TS]

01:06:44 ◼   ► broken up into different parts World War [TS]

01:06:46 ◼   ► one yeah sure pressure pressure pressure [TS]

01:06:48 ◼   ► pressure austro-hungary so Germany is [TS]

01:06:52 ◼   ► really a modern conflation but the thing [TS]

01:06:54 ◼   ► is all these little provinces and do [TS]

01:06:56 ◼   ► cheese and Margrave eighths and you know [TS]

01:07:00 ◼   ► like bishoprics they all as the [TS]

01:07:05 ◼   ► Reformation went percolating through the [TS]

01:07:07 ◼   ► German little little pockets and little [TS]

01:07:11 ◼   ► castles basically everywhere there was a [TS]

01:07:13 ◼   ► castle there was somebody up on the top [TS]

01:07:14 ◼   ► of the castle and that person controlled [TS]

01:07:16 ◼   ► a certain amount of land around them and [TS]

01:07:19 ◼   ► some had big land and some had small [TS]

01:07:21 ◼   ► land but here comes the Reformation [TS]

01:07:23 ◼   ► perking through like coffee through [TS]

01:07:25 ◼   ► grounds and this castle guy says I [TS]

01:07:29 ◼   ► believe yes I'm gonna I'm gonna go with [TS]

01:07:33 ◼   ► these 90 plus species and I'm going to [TS]

01:07:37 ◼   ► I'm gonna say like leaving the church [TS]

01:07:39 ◼   ► behind I'm gonna have a direct [TS]

01:07:41 ◼   ► connection with the with my Lord and [TS]

01:07:43 ◼   ► Savior and then the castle next door [TS]

01:07:45 ◼   ► says he'll know we won't go say nine [TS]

01:07:48 ◼   ► yeah they say Nick and they stay with [TS]

01:07:51 ◼   ► the with the ll popo mm-hmm in el Romo [TS]

01:07:56 ◼   ► and for a while there of course in a be [TS]

01:07:58 ◼   ► honest yeah having young back up back up [TS]

01:08:00 ◼   ► Pope yeah all made an saloni danza sur [TS]

01:08:03 ◼   ► sur sur la so loose sand salalah mayor [TS]

01:08:06 ◼   ► right Percy small [TS]

01:08:12 ◼   ► hi okay [TS]