Cortex 45: Cortex Working Group


  time is sat let's do this thing shall we [TS]

  alright let's do this time is running [TS]

  got a ton of time tracking follow-up [TS]

  yeah we did it seems like things like [TS]

  from the reddit and from various other [TS]

  sources of feedback that time tracking [TS]

  is a topic a lot of people were [TS]

  interested in and a lot of people had a [TS]

  bunch of questions about yeah it's not [TS]

  surprising because it is it's an [TS]

  interesting idea and it's one of the [TS]

  things that i think yes we were kind of [TS]

  pushing towards that everyone can do Who [TS]

  land but it's just depending on how you [TS]

  want to do it right and we got a bunch [TS]

  of questions [TS]

  one of them was students should students [TS]

  track that time and I wonder what you [TS]

  think about this because i have no idea [TS]

  exciting never been more I mean you've [TS]

  got to school at some point like yeah [TS]

  but it was like it was important you [TS]

  know like I I quit when the school that [TS]

  important [TS]

  IC stopped right after they they talk to [TS]

  you how to read and how to tie your [TS]

  shoes i was out there which i think is [TS]

  what is where the marginal utility of [TS]

  school starts to rapidly decline is [TS]

  after those two points [TS]

  yeah i went to sweep chimneys man was [TS]

  close [TS]

  I was straight out of a down the coal [TS]

  mine their number of students were [TS]

  actually asking about about this and i [TS]

  would say that if i was in college or [TS]

  university now with the level of [TS]

  technology that we have now versus when [TS]

  I was actually in college university I i [TS]

  would totally do some kind of time [TS]

  tracking around at the bare minimum [TS]

  study hours in the same way that before [TS]

  i started barking down this goal of [TS]

  trying to time track all of my waking [TS]

  hours I used to just keep track of the [TS]

  most core important things which was [TS]

  primarily writing and podcast recording [TS]

  i think the equivalent to that of being [TS]

  a student is studying like that is the [TS]

  core prime activity that you want to [TS]

  record and i would suspect for any [TS]

  students who are listening to [TS]

  the podcast if they do that they would [TS]

  probably have a similar reaction that [TS]

  you did last time where you were [TS]

  describing on the previous episode if I [TS]

  can summarize it like if a feeling of [TS]

  relief at realizing that you are not [TS]

  actually working all day like every [TS]

  waking moment of your life that you just [TS]

  have these times that are are punctuated [TS]

  and get your brain kind of tricks you [TS]

  into feeling like you've been doing a [TS]

  thing all day I definitely know that in [TS]

  when i was in university there were days [TS]

  that I almost certainly felt like oh god [TS]

  I've been studying all day but what [TS]

  really happened that was probably in the [TS]

  library all day which is a very [TS]

  different thing from studying all day [TS]

  and so I i think that there would [TS]

  definitely be real value to be gained [TS]

  around a better understanding of how [TS]

  much time are you really actually [TS]

  studying and if i was a student I would [TS]

  I would totally track at least that I [TS]

  mean what was the utility either like [TS]

  him because I guess with the way that [TS]

  we're doing it so we can maximize our [TS]

  efficiency for our work would you say [TS]

  it's a similar kind of ideas like to [TS]

  maximize your study time my my view on [TS]

  this is the time tracking is is [TS]

  beneficial because it increases my [TS]

  awareness of what am i doing with my [TS]

  time and I think that is a thing that I [TS]

  find valuable in and of itself and it's [TS]

  a thing that that seems to me to be much [TS]

  more valuable the more time that I'm [TS]

  tracking is just simply an awareness of [TS]

  exactly how am I really spending my time [TS]

  and we only have a limited amount of [TS]

  time you know grains of sand passing [TS]

  through an hourglass toward the end i [TS]

  get is a non-renewable resource and I [TS]

  think that this is really helpful in all [TS]

  directions of achieving anything and so [TS]

  for example a total non-monetary thing [TS]

  with them [TS]

  I'm doing but I've been working over the [TS]

  last couple months to try to increase [TS]

  the number of books that i read i like [TS]

  I'm not entirely happy looking over my [TS]

  books for the last couple years of how [TS]

  many books are on there and this is this [TS]

  is a case like is that a monetary value [TS]

  i mean like sort of related to my work [TS]

  but not really not in a directly [TS]

  effective way and the time tracking is [TS]

  just a case of being mindful of how much [TS]

  time i actually spending on that and you [TS]

  know i can say like oh here's a bunch of [TS]

  time or i was reading here's a bunch [TS]

  time when I wasn't reading like we're [TS]

  there other other activities that we're [TS]

  taking up the time that could have been [TS]

  better spent and particularly if you're [TS]

  being really honest with the time [TS]

  tracking and putting in like wasted time [TS]

  in some sense I feel like it's helpful [TS]

  in constraining wasted time because it's [TS]

  like well if I want all of the days to [TS]

  be as full as they can be of time [TS]

  tracking like I'm gonna have to put this [TS]

  on here of like what am i doing or what [TS]

  am I not doing so I feel like it is a [TS]

  generally useful mindfulness and like [TS]

  self-direction tool in addition to just [TS]

  being about like the bottom line and [TS]

  trying to increase efficiency [TS]

  here's my concern with that like with [TS]

  the tracking of everything [TS]

  if you are very aware of the worth of [TS]

  your time because of the calculations [TS]

  that you've done by tracking everything [TS]

  don't you run the risk of not spending [TS]

  enough time doing things that are [TS]

  working don't you just look at those [TS]

  reports and be like I spent three hours [TS]

  playing video games because you actually [TS]

  see what it is and then you like could [TS]

  not have been three hours spent trying [TS]

  to write a script it isn't there a risk [TS]

  in that like I see the number of hours [TS]

  on a work every day I don't know how [TS]

  many hours i'm awake really so maybe [TS]

  it's like the rest of the time like [TS]

  sitting and binging on parks and [TS]

  recreation isn't a problem for me [TS]

  because I don't see it in hard numbers [TS]

  this sort of gets the thing that i [TS]

  mentioned last time briefly which is I [TS]

  have these two categories of like for [TS]

  recreation and kind of like intentional [TS]

  recreation and like an unintentional [TS]

  recreation i'm working on refining a [TS]

  bunch of these [TS]

  categories over time and what I feel [TS]

  like those two categories really are is [TS]

  recreation and entertainment time that I [TS]

  can purely unadulterated Lee feel good [TS]

  about and recreation time where I feel [TS]

  like maybe there's something else I [TS]

  should be doing and so my view on it is [TS]

  like okay this is a this is a helpful [TS]

  thing for me to try to move as as much [TS]

  of my non-working time into like a [TS]

  higher state of enjoyment vs non [TS]

  enjoyment and then like that's that's [TS]

  what this is but there's if you're doing [TS]

  calculations of how much is your time [TS]

  worth like well there's there's no way [TS]

  that you can possibly be working all day [TS]

  every day in a sustainable way and if [TS]

  you if you if you think that you are [TS]

  mistaken or if you are able to do that [TS]

  you are a totally lucky genetic freak [TS]

  that you are different from the rest of [TS]

  us and like that's that's not what a [TS]

  normal person's life is like how do you [TS]

  decide how much recreation time you get [TS]

  though [TS]

  well I mean at the moment I'm i'm still [TS]

  in the early phases of this i am not [TS]

  making any real intentional decisions [TS]

  about how much work versus non-working [TS]

  time is is occurring i'm still mostly in [TS]

  the recording and just trying to see [TS]

  what like is naturally happening over [TS]

  time but at least for me and and i would [TS]

  suspect for other people who are [TS]

  self-employed in extreme ways like you [TS]

  are in control over your own schedule [TS]

  what I'm more keeping in mind is a [TS]

  diminishing returns on the working time [TS]

  so that if I'm if I'm working on a thing [TS]

  like that let's let's say Mike let's say [TS]

  you and I we wanted to record like 10 [TS]

  podcasts in a single day like okay we [TS]

  could do one we could maybe do too but [TS]

  probably by the time we get to podcast [TS]

  three there's a severe diminishing [TS]

  returns in there like you just done [TS]

  thank you just you just can't keep going [TS]

  at a certain point and [TS]

  and I feel like lots of high-intensity [TS]

  work if you if you pay attention to your [TS]

  mind has a kind of natural point that is [TS]

  a diminishing return again in my winter [TS]

  review when I was doing a lot a lot of [TS]

  like metalwork sort of working on the [TS]

  work in thinking through systems and [TS]

  setting up the time tracking and doing [TS]

  all these other things it wasn't it [TS]

  wasn't a question of like how many hours [TS]

  of recreation do I get it was coming [TS]

  from entirely the opposite perspective [TS]

  of i'm doing some high intensity work [TS]

  when do I feel like I have kind of run [TS]

  out of steam for this and I need to [TS]

  shift to a different activity might be [TS]

  that going to the gym right or be that [TS]

  goofing off and playing video games like [TS]

  it's that I feel like it it's coming [TS]

  from an opposite question like i would i [TS]

  would like to have the work hours in my [TS]

  life be maximally effective and and I [TS]

  feel like that's the thing that I'm I'm [TS]

  trying to pay attention for not [TS]

  necessarily aiming for like oh boy into [TS]

  my billing rate is X dollars per hour [TS]

  let me try to maximize in every possible [TS]

  way the sheer number of hours per day [TS]

  that work is occurring and and so I [TS]

  think with anybody who's doing the time [TS]

  tracking like if you're a student [TS]

  tracking your time or anything i feel [TS]

  like this is one of the big benefits to [TS]

  get is like is not just not just a [TS]

  record of hours but his sense of the [TS]

  effectiveness of those hours and I feel [TS]

  like tracking the time forces you to pay [TS]

  attention to what were you really doing [TS]

  and and that's why I think like the [TS]

  studying is a great place to start [TS]

  because if I think it forces you to be [TS]

  honest if you're running a little timer [TS]

  like what I really studying for the last [TS]

  15 minutes or was a kind of dancing [TS]

  around studying for the last 15 minutes [TS]

  and if the latter then it's like okay [TS]

  well that doesn't count and sort of [TS]

  start again and and try to get in like a [TS]

  real solid block of actually doing like [TS]

  high-quality work on the thing that [TS]

  you're attempting to do [TS]

  how's it going for you Mike so I have [TS]

  been recording for about I'm in my [TS]

  fourth week now so my data is becoming [TS]

  more stable i have logged about 84 hours [TS]

  of work so far into toggle and I'm [TS]

  feeling pretty good about it a lot of [TS]

  the assumptions that i made last time [TS]

  are holding true about where my time is [TS]

  being spent who I'm finding that i could [TS]

  probably have maybe four to five hours [TS]

  of my time taken away i'm on just the [TS]

  basic things that we would want to give [TS]

  to an assistant who which I feel like [TS]

  lines up with the kind of around 10 [TS]

  hours a week we wanted to give because [TS]

  that person coming initially it would [TS]

  take longer to do the stuff that I do [TS]

  then me because they will be learning [TS]

  right and then over time you would kind [TS]

  of that would take them less time and I [TS]

  need to find new testament to do so I [TS]

  feel like the goal has been achieved [TS]

  I feel personally I feel like that i [TS]

  found enough of my time to to give to [TS]

  somebody and the the statistics of like [TS]

  editing to recording you know so in the [TS]

  last three and a half weeks it's been [TS]

  about three and a half weeks I've spent [TS]

  35 and a half hours recording shows and [TS]

  i spent 21 hours editing shows blue and [TS]

  about 12 hours preparing ok [TS]

  those numbers are not based lining up [TS]

  based on my original expectations but [TS]

  they are lining up based on what week [TS]

  one told me [TS]

  right okay i see like okay so you did [TS]

  the first week of time tracking yep and [TS]

  then that allows you to sort of project [TS]

  forward with a with a somewhat [TS]

  reasonable basis to start at least they [TS]

  could data point to start exactly and [TS]

  that that seems to have rung true as you [TS]

  know it's about two-thirds of the [TS]

  recording time in editing and what I you [TS]

  know what I saw was about third at the [TS]

  time recording in preparation and again [TS]

  I remain very happy with the preparation [TS]

  number i am less comfortable of the [TS]

  editing number right and I'm thinking [TS]

  about that now like what can I do about [TS]

  that when I'm editing now I'm being more [TS]

  conscious at the time [TS]

  I'm taking not that I'm rushing it but [TS]

  trying to be more efficient with it and [TS]

  just seeing what sort of things I can do [TS]

  that [TS]

  so who that's been that has been useful [TS]

  so far and one thing that I was [TS]

  interested to see is kind of on a [TS]

  breakdown of shows how that stuff works [TS]

  out and again I am I'm happy to kind of [TS]

  look at that and I feel that what I'm [TS]

  seeing from that so from the report [TS]

  based on like how long each show is [TS]

  taking me [TS]

  I'm not concerned about that at all [TS]

  because that is lining up exactly how I [TS]

  expected and wanted so the shows that we [TS]

  have the largest audiences for the shows [TS]

  that make the most money [TS]

  the show's i'm spending the most time on [TS]

  and then it goes down from there and [TS]

  that feels like the right kind of thing [TS]

  for me to be doing with that [TS]

  yeah that feels like the correct way [TS]

  that it should be ordered and it's good [TS]

  to see that in the actual data [TS]

  yeah you want to reveal how many hours [TS]

  it took the last cortex to be made [TS]

  yeah I get information up yeah i'm going [TS]

  to bring it up the last cortex took [TS]

  eight hours and 12 minutes 44 seconds in [TS]

  total from recording editing preparation [TS]

  and posting the bunch of time it's a lot [TS]

  of time but I think it's worth it Mike [TS]

  I think it's worth it I do too i mean [TS]

  and again like it [TS]

  that might change when it comes to [TS]

  working out like what my time is worth [TS]

  who but based upon what I expect that is [TS]

  that makes perfect sense to me but just [TS]

  that shows you ladies and gentlemen that [TS]

  it takes eight and a quarter hours to [TS]

  get you 90 minutes but that's why we do [TS]

  every two weeks [TS]

  this is all the editing time Mike [TS]

  requires uh-huh to make me sound like a [TS]

  normal coherent person [TS]

  uh-huh that's that's what sucker punch [TS]

  for someone days it was only a one-hour [TS]

  recording and then just hang out with it [TS]

  yeah I'm real incoherence backward like [TS]

  mike is piecing together individual [TS]

  words to make sentences are rearranging [TS]

  words and sentences it's I just have a [TS]

  bank of words and i just put them all [TS]

  together as brilliant [TS]

  yeah i was just I'm just pulling up my [TS]

  report for the last 30 days and yet [TS]

  again it's it is very interesting to me [TS]

  to attempt to do this thing of recording [TS]

  all over the time and I would be [TS]

  interested to hear in the comments if [TS]

  anybody else's is attempting to do a [TS]

  similar thing because i am endlessly [TS]

  fascinated by how surprisingly hard it [TS]

  actually is to record a full day like in [TS]

  in theory right there should be [TS]

  something like 16 hours track today [TS]

  because that's about as long as I'm [TS]

  going to be awake [TS]

  it is so hard to actually get to that [TS]

  because there are so many kinds of [TS]

  project that i'm working on work feels [TS]

  like what is this thing that I'm doing [TS]

  right now like how with this get [TS]

  categorized or things that I'm aware of [TS]

  that are are like transition times where [TS]

  you're switching from one thing to [TS]

  another and you're sort of in between [TS]

  two tasks and it's interesting just [TS]

  trying to find the balance of recording [TS]

  things without being a crazy person [TS]

  yeah and recording lots of little [TS]

  categories that don't matter here one of [TS]

  these for me was listening feedback i [TS]

  started to track that but it's [TS]

  impossible for me to track that because [TS]

  that would be like tracking two seconds [TS]

  right to like or elected in the time it [TS]

  takes for me to send a tweet or to you [TS]

  know to favor tweet or to reply to an [TS]

  email like it'sit's that would be way [TS]

  too many entries of really short time [TS]

  that I figure it's not what it's not [TS]

  what doing is plus as well when it's [TS]

  like Twitter well i'm also slacking off [TS]

  at the exact same time that these tweets [TS]

  will come through so it did that which [TS]

  is too difficult for me to track going [TS]

  for it [TS]

  yeah and i had a had a moment like this [TS]

  just the other day where was I was [TS]

  really aware of thanks [TS]

  so here's the thing that I'm doing I'm [TS]

  sitting on the couch with my wife [TS]

  we're sort of half watching a TV show [TS]

  but i'm also replying to a bunch of [TS]

  comments in my subreddit and talking to [TS]

  some people on slack [TS]

  how is this activity to be categorized [TS]

  there is no meaningful useful way to [TS]

  describe this period of time is supposed [TS]

  to be watching a TV show and you can get [TS]

  from that everything LOL yeah and and [TS]

  it's like that that is a perfect case of [TS]

  like well okay here was an hour or two [TS]

  of time that was useful in a bunch of [TS]

  ways but it is impossible to [TS]

  consistently and meaningfully categorize [TS]

  and so that's time that I felt like okay [TS]

  well i'm just letting that go [TS]

  but it's a perfect example of of a like [TS]

  a mixed kind of thing i have for anyone [TS]

  else try this experiment i have come up [TS]

  with two useful rules of thumb for [TS]

  difficult to categorize time though [TS]

  and one of these is a campus i'm [TS]

  thinking of things like sort of my [TS]

  equivalent of a commute now many things [TS]

  that I do work within walking distance [TS]

  of where I live but okay how am I going [TS]

  to track exercise time because there's [TS]

  many different categories here is like [TS]

  well mi tracking the literal minutes in [TS]

  the gym that I'm exercising my tracking [TS]

  the entire time that I met in the gym or [TS]

  my tracking like the time that it also [TS]

  takes me to get ready to go to the gym [TS]

  right like that's it's not an [TS]

  immediately clear answer and my rule of [TS]

  thumb for this kind of stuff is as soon [TS]

  as the transition starts start recording [TS]

  i have finished activity a i am now [TS]

  deciding like i am going to the gym [TS]

  timer starts now until I'm finished and [TS]

  if that means it includes like packing [TS]

  up the gym clothes and and walking down [TS]

  the street to the gym like that's fine [TS]

  because what I'm trying to capture is [TS]

  not really the literal minutes that I'm [TS]

  exercising I'm trying to capture the [TS]

  total amount of time out of my life that [TS]

  exercise takes do you track the time in [TS]

  which are trying to convince yourself to [TS]

  go to the gym but instead you're [TS]

  coloring do you track that time because [TS]

  that's that's time that games included [TS]

  in my gym time [TS]

  see that's that ok i was gonna say this [TS]

  sounds like a very specific question [TS]

  not a general question for a person in [TS]

  particular um so I do have a category [TS]

  that's like essentially a version of [TS]

  wasted time which always gets filled in [TS]

  retrospect which is intended to do with [TS]

  thing and failed and then I recognize [TS]

  okay well look back in the clock and see [TS]

  what like when was the left that point [TS]

  the last time we stopped and then feel [TS]

  like from that moment until now [TS]

  you failed time right that's essentially [TS]

  what that is so no coloring in your [TS]

  coloring book and not going to the gym [TS]

  but thinking about going to the gym at [TS]

  least the way I track things i would not [TS]

  actually put as Jim time in my system I [TS]

  wouldn't recommend that [TS]

  FYI am back on the coloring train didn't [TS]

  know you ever left this episode of [TS]

  cortex is brought to you in part by [TS]

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  cortex and enter cortex in the how did [TS]

  you hear about a section so they'll know [TS]

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  that's fresh / cortex thank [TS]

  you so much to freshbooks for supporting [TS]

  the show and all real afm the other just [TS]

  quick rule of thumb that i have found [TS]

  useful is if there is a situation where [TS]

  I'm recording some time that could [TS]

  possibly be two different things so it's [TS]

  not a multi-faceted ambiguous things [TS]

  like like the thing i was saying before [TS]

  but let's say I'm having a like a [TS]

  meeting with someone and there's a [TS]

  question about is like this this this [TS]

  meeting that I'm having with the person [TS]

  it's like half a social meeting and it's [TS]

  half a business meeting like which one [TS]

  is the thing under those circumstances [TS]

  my rule of thumb is just to put it in [TS]

  the less frequently tracked category of [TS]

  whatever it could be if I'm trying to [TS]

  choose between two different activities [TS]

  what do you mean by less frequently [TS]

  track so it's like if I have a category [TS]

  which is say like social time and I have [TS]

  another category which is business [TS]

  planning time and i'm having a meeting [TS]

  with someone that could be both of those [TS]

  things [TS]

  whichever of those categories i have [TS]

  less trapped I'm track for in the system [TS]

  i will count that towards the the one [TS]

  that is less going to be social time [TS]

  right [TS]

  okay yeah I'll check but I have those [TS]

  two rules of them not because they're [TS]

  the correct way to do it but that they [TS]

  exist to cut down on the thinking and [TS]

  the ambiguous in any situation as far as [TS]

  time tracking goes yeah the rules are [TS]

  good because like do you end up with 25 [TS]

  seconds of thinking about time tracking [TS]

  before you track any action and then at [TS]

  that point it's like it's starting to [TS]

  work against itself it's exactly like [TS]

  what one of the key things here and one [TS]

  of the very reasons why i'm using toggle [TS]

  is this is all about speed and ease of [TS]

  entry [TS]

  I get it has to be [TS]

  a really fast no-brainer to start a [TS]

  timer for a particular activity and if [TS]

  you're going to spend any brain power at [TS]

  all filing away the thing that you're [TS]

  doing like this becomes I think totally [TS]

  self-defeating so that that's why i [TS]

  eventually settled on those two rules as [TS]

  when situations came up that were a [TS]

  little bit unclear either of these rules [TS]

  most of the time resolves whatever it is [TS]

  that I'm i'm attempting to do and then [TS]

  again particularly with the exercise [TS]

  thing it's like I'm concerned about how [TS]

  much time does this take out of my life [TS]

  like if I wasn't exercising if I wasn't [TS]

  going to the gym I wouldn't be getting [TS]

  ready to go to the gym and walking to [TS]

  this is like I would be getting all that [TS]

  time back so i think it's a fair thing [TS]

  to represent in that way so those are [TS]

  the those are my rules of thumb so far i [TS]

  want to give a shout out to someone in [TS]

  the reddits why is this so funny Mike [TS]

  is that what you do now she can shout [TS]

  outs to people i don't know [TS]

  isn't that the the word no that's it [TS]

  yeah yeah the shower referencing someone [TS]

  I don't know [TS]

  shoutout to my red use their ego ready [TS]

  haha already in the reddit left a [TS]

  comment that i am really grateful for [TS]

  he proposed an alternate name for my [TS]

  year of new as year of redirection and [TS]

  that this was fantastic because [TS]

  listening back to previous show I was [TS]

  just so aware of i'm doing a terrible [TS]

  job of attempting to explain like what [TS]

  what am I going for here and just like i [TS]

  mentioned with the quarterly reviews and [TS]

  trying to change that word into season i [TS]

  think a large part of it was like new [TS]

  was just not quite the right word and [TS]

  that ends of the coloring the way that [TS]

  I'm thinking about things but I feel [TS]

  like year of redirection is the label [TS]

  that I was not able to come up with on [TS]

  my own but someone else listening to me [TS]

  ramble about my ideas of what's going to [TS]

  happen is like oh you nailed it better [TS]

  than I did year every direction feels [TS]

  exactly right I'm not I wasn't aiming [TS]

  for a whole ton of new things [TS]

  it's it's more like a refinement of a [TS]

  bunch of things and exactly how I'm [TS]

  going to be spending my energy and where [TS]

  am I putting my efforts and like this [TS]

  this just feels like the perfect label [TS]

  so i'm i'm crossing out year of new and [TS]

  writing over it [TS]

  year of redirection so thank you you're [TS]

  ready for coming up with that this makes [TS]

  way more sense as to why here if you [TS]

  didn't mean new projects but right [TS]

  exactly about it's about doing the same [TS]

  stuff but doing it differently like [TS]

  different levels of time going to each [TS]

  of them like if you imagine them in a [TS]

  pot shot and i'm only thinking of this [TS]

  because i was just looking at a report [TS]

  that's because it's emblazoned in my [TS]

  brain now to see all those little bars [TS]

  going up and down it is that basically [TS]

  if you had all of your little tasks in a [TS]

  bar chart just moving them around right [TS]

  so like the same amount of time is there [TS]

  but it's just being moved into different [TS]

  silos [TS]

  yeah exactly and it's it's also why like [TS]

  why does the attempt at several months [TS]

  of time tracking everything [TS]

  why does that fall under the year of [TS]

  knew that makes no sense that doesn't [TS]

  fit at all but your redirection it's [TS]

  perfect it's a perfectly sensible [TS]

  project to take on during that time [TS]

  exactly because that's how you find out [TS]

  what to redirect exactly you got you [TS]

  you're measuring things ended up it also [TS]

  lines up with my own personal feelings [TS]

  that led me towards this which was a lot [TS]

  a lot of monkeying around with schedules [TS]

  for my business over the next year and [TS]

  thinking about how I'm working it's like [TS]

  yes all of this lines up much much much [TS]

  better with your redirection so I am [TS]

  ridiculously pleased about this because [TS]

  i really was not entirely satisfied with [TS]

  year of new and I was even more grumpy [TS]

  listening to myself talk about Europe [TS]

  new on the previous episode so I'm much [TS]

  happier man right now this is you know [TS]

  this is why you have a podcast we talk [TS]

  about your work so people can make it [TS]

  better it i have to say it is it is a [TS]

  great little moment of feedback like let [TS]

  me talk about some things in an [TS]

  incoherent way maybe one of you can [TS]

  summarize in a better way and somebody [TS]

  did that train [TS]

  I mean it was it is not really practical [TS]

  all for all of our listeners to have [TS]

  their own versions of cortex where they [TS]

  talk to someone about their productivity [TS]

  who i would recommend that people in [TS]

  their lives try and find someone they [TS]

  can have these types of conversations [TS]

  with because i know that i have become [TS]

  better at working since me and you start [TS]

  explaining things to each other [TS]

  blue because i feel like i have to [TS]

  justify how I think about things and [TS]

  when i do that enables me to make things [TS]

  clearer look and also as I you know the [TS]

  more i talk about the fact that i'm [TS]

  switching to do this but haven't done it [TS]

  the more I realized that i need to [TS]

  actually do it because otherwise I just [TS]

  keep saying I'm gonna do it if you can [TS]

  find someone in your life that you can [TS]

  talk to about these things that's good [TS]

  or just spend time in the cortex uh [TS]

  brother honest I can be in serious [TS]

  because there are people in there who [TS]

  are talking about the stuff of each [TS]

  other and I think that's valuable yeah I [TS]

  i really i really have to agree with [TS]

  that and it's like it is a thing that is [TS]

  mutually beneficial to have somebody [TS]

  else that you talked to this stuff about [TS]

  because that there really is a process [TS]

  by which when you have to articulate out [TS]

  loud your own reasons for doing anything [TS]

  you often find that you have been doing [TS]

  a thing without really thinking about it [TS]

  humid so much nicer than make I was [TS]

  gonna finish the sentence for saying [TS]

  stupidly now but it but here's the thing [TS]

  I I really there is a real distinction [TS]

  between doing something stupidly and [TS]

  doing something unintentionally mm and [TS]

  it right it's very very easy to do lots [TS]

  of things in an unintentional manner and [TS]

  to just not think through the process of [TS]

  why am I doing this thing this way and I [TS]

  am i doing it this way because this is [TS]

  the way I did it the first time and I've [TS]

  just repeated that activity all over [TS]

  again or like am I doing this thing [TS]

  because this is the way other people do [TS]

  it as I ok well if that's the reason [TS]

  do other people have a good reason for [TS]

  doing it this way or are they doing it [TS]

  just because they see other people doing [TS]

  it right [TS]

  it's it is a it is hugely valuable to [TS]

  repeatedly and consistently reassess [TS]

  your reasons for why you do something [TS]

  and when you talk to somebody else about [TS]

  it there's an accountability that [TS]

  happens when you externalize these [TS]

  thought processes and it's funny I [TS]

  actually saw someone somewhere on the [TS]

  reddit describe this show as like it it [TS]

  is turned into like a working journalist [TS]

  between the two of us [TS]

  wow that we're coming together every two [TS]

  weeks and we're we're talking about our [TS]

  work together and then that like the the [TS]

  listen area is participating in this [TS]

  like working journal of hearing two [TS]

  people just talk about what they're up [TS]

  to [TS]

  like that's an interesting that's an [TS]

  interesting way to look at the way this [TS]

  has developed over time and i think it's [TS]

  it's pretty accurate [TS]

  yeah and and does have this effect like [TS]

  I am really aware that there's there's a [TS]

  few things in my own working world that [TS]

  i have changed or work to change because [TS]

  I realized when I talk about it on the [TS]

  show like how it makes me think about it [TS]

  more like I've sort of mentioned number [TS]

  of times like growing frustration with [TS]

  like getting things done and not [TS]

  necessarily working for me the way that [TS]

  it used to it's like and I know I make [TS]

  and I'll say this on the show and then [TS]

  that causes me to think about it more [TS]

  right which which has like a little bit [TS]

  of a feedback loop but I i really do [TS]

  think that's the case and if you can if [TS]

  you can find someone in real life to do [TS]

  this with it's even better in a form a [TS]

  little cortex working group with some [TS]

  people to get together and talk about [TS]

  what you're up to I really do think it [TS]

  is hugely beneficial today's episode of [TS]

  cortex is brought to you by a new [TS]

  sponsor and that is movement watches [TS]

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  movement watches feature a classic [TS]

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  minimalism movement wanted to send me a [TS]

  watch so I took a look at the great [TS]

  selection and pick one out that I like [TS]

  the look of and I'm really happy with it [TS]

  it's got a great band and there is a [TS]

  great watch face with some blue dials [TS]

  and I really love the blue dials the [TS]

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  surprised at how good this looks and [TS]

  feels for the price like I am very very [TS]

  surprised about like genuinely I was [TS]

  wondering like what is a 130 if I do [TS]

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  surprised it's got good weight to it [TS]

  it's packaged beautifully [TS]

  these are really really good-looking [TS]

  watches that feel good to wear as well i [TS]

  mean i've been wearing an Apple watch [TS]

  for a while and I've got to say that use [TS]

  wearing something like this has a real [TS]

  nice different feel to it there's [TS]

  definitely like a different level of [TS]

  class to it that I've been enjoying a [TS]

  lot and everybody that I shown it to is [TS]

  super impressive as well so it gets full [TS]

  marks for me as a nice little accessory [TS]

  nice piece of fashion to where you can [TS]

  find out more about movement watches but [TS]

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  cortex is time for you to step up your [TS]

  watch game and join the movement and hey [TS]

  valentine's Day is just around the [TS]

  corner could be a great gift for someone [TS]

  Thank You movement watches for [TS]

  supporting this show every layer [TS]

  them i have a question for you maybe [TS]

  this wall will be a good entry in the [TS]

  journal who [TS]

  why has it been so long since has been a [TS]

  video like this is not this I don't [TS]

  think this has been the longest amount [TS]

  of time but you were on a real tear for [TS]

  a while with a bunch of videos some [TS]

  would call it an out-of-character amount [TS]

  of videos for you i would call it out of [TS]

  character number of videos but we're [TS]

  about what we just over two months which [TS]

  you know usually looking at your kind of [TS]

  your your page here guess at the last [TS]

  year you've had a video every month or [TS]

  two months and then when it's been two [TS]

  months [TS]

  there is like a couple of videos or [TS]

  something like that and again just from [TS]

  me knowing a little bit about what you [TS]

  do I don't get a sense that you're [TS]

  knee-deep on a video right now so I'm [TS]

  just wondering what's going on is it [TS]

  like is you still got a hangover from [TS]

  court xmas like was what's happening [TS]

  over there [TS]

  I was just looking through my in-depth [TS]

  private video analysis spreadsheet upon [TS]

  which I record all of the data about all [TS]

  of the things it is not the longest gap [TS]

  between real videos but it is it is [TS]

  rapidly gaining on the longest gap [TS]

  between i consider to be real videos do [TS]

  you think it's going to pass it [TS]

  yes okay at this point if i had to put [TS]

  money on it and I of course have insider [TS]

  knowledge in this betting pool yeah I [TS]

  don't think you could I think you [TS]

  definitely could not make this back it [TS]

  seemed like that's where you have [TS]

  insider information are the best that's [TS]

  good yeah really i really want there to [TS]

  be like a betting pool about the day [TS]

  that my next video would come out it's [TS]

  like man I would just I would clean [TS]

  house with a really would but [TS]

  unfortunately that's not a thing that [TS]

  exists it will be super up saying if you [TS]

  didn't [TS]

  yeah it would be upsetting to me as well [TS]

  be missing out on all of that but you [TS]

  know that it has it has been a very long [TS]

  time [TS]

  I mean this is what this is one of these [TS]

  things that like I'm not even really i'm [TS]

  not even really sure how to talk about [TS]

  this or even like how how much I want to [TS]

  talk about it because it comes it comes [TS]

  very close along this this fine edge of [TS]

  what is my personal life and this thing [TS]

  about being a person who does work in [TS]

  public back in November my wife had a [TS]

  very serious repeated number of [TS]

  hospitalizations that were as serious as [TS]

  these things can can possibly be [TS]

  she's fine now she's flying just people [TS]

  now [TS]

  it ended up taking up a blowhard portion [TS]

  of my mental energy managing this [TS]

  situation when you're self-employed it's [TS]

  it's great on one hand that you can drop [TS]

  everything and and focus on what is the [TS]

  most important thing at the moment but [TS]

  it does also mean that it there's nobody [TS]

  else to pick up the slack when you [TS]

  yourself are are not working and so this [TS]

  this has has definitely been a thing [TS]

  which caused some delays there is no [TS]

  such thing as compassionately when you [TS]

  have no employer yeah that that is true [TS]

  this is something we're at this moment [TS]

  had been just a regular employee many [TS]

  things would have been much easier in a [TS]

  way user you can get time off you know [TS]

  you know everything's running when [TS]

  you're not there and you know you come [TS]

  back at some later point but it is [TS]

  definitely a case of everything kind of [TS]

  stops if you are the one person who is [TS]

  running your own business and so I spent [TS]

  a large amount of of energy on the [TS]

  situation and then not [TS]

  not surprisingly I myself became pretty [TS]

  horrific Lee sick after the [TS]

  this for a while and it's not something [TS]

  I really wanted to discuss at the time [TS]

  it was something that few people who are [TS]

  used to the way my voice normally sounds [TS]

  definitely picked up on a couple of [TS]

  those podcasts that we're going out in [TS]

  december i did see people saying like he [TS]

  doesn't sound so great and yet the the [TS]

  answer was I was I was not in I was not [TS]

  in great shape think we had to stop one [TS]

  of the cortex podcasts halfway through [TS]

  don't even actually really remember but [TS]

  it was blank [TS]

  there was just the whole it wasn't a big [TS]

  ol thing but yeah so that's that people [TS]

  ask that's one of these things that's [TS]

  been happening I don't necessarily [TS]

  really like to talk about this stuff [TS]

  again because there's this weird line [TS]

  between being like a public person and a [TS]

  private person yet so people don't need [TS]

  to know [TS]

  yeah exactly you feel sometimes not [TS]

  always you feel an obligation to be open [TS]

  yeah its people care about you [TS]

  right well now you got it back up there [TS]

  my can disagree with you there [TS]

  I i actually actually think that it's [TS]

  part of the hesitation is on his [TS]

  understand i think it's very important [TS]

  for anybody who does any work in the [TS]

  public space to understand that the [TS]

  audience actually doesn't care about you [TS]

  there's this big difference between like [TS]

  you the person who lives your life and [TS]

  the the you that exists in the [TS]

  audience's mind through the media that [TS]

  you create that was the you I meant [TS]

  though it is [TS]

  cgpgrey that they care about that's what [TS]

  i mean is is the version of yourself [TS]

  that they interact with which is not the [TS]

  whole person right it's not it's not the [TS]

  whole person and it's it's a thing [TS]

  that's like if that I've had some [TS]

  conversations with some people I try to [TS]

  convince the very hard about this works [TS]

  like you have to you have to understand [TS]

  as a public person that's like like I am [TS]

  very aware that when people listen to [TS]

  the podcasts they're not listening to [TS]

  the podcast because it's me [TS]

  people listen to podcast because they [TS]

  get some kind of enjoyment or some sort [TS]

  of entertainment out of it or some value [TS]

  out of it right that's the reason that [TS]

  people listen to podcasts and [TS]

  it's the same it's the same thing with [TS]

  the videos like what why do people [TS]

  subscribe to my youtube channel to watch [TS]

  my videos is because they derive some [TS]

  sort of enjoyment and entertainment out [TS]

  of the videos that I produce like and [TS]

  and and that's where what the audience [TS]

  cares about comes from and if I feel [TS]

  like sometimes talking about personal [TS]

  stuff is like blurring the line that [TS]

  often the audience doesn't even [TS]

  necessarily want to have blurred down [TS]

  yeah and and so and so that's why it's [TS]

  like while all of this stuff was going [TS]

  on I just didn't really want to talk [TS]

  about it at all because it's like a much [TS]

  more comfortable just like mentioning [TS]

  that like a thing has occurred and then [TS]

  I'm on the other side of it and it's [TS]

  over [TS]

  and this is why there was a delay as [TS]

  opposed to saying oh I'm in the middle [TS]

  of a terrible thing right now [TS]

  alright cuz you know what it's not fun [TS]

  to listen to on a podcast but don't need [TS]

  to know [TS]

  yeah and people don't need to know [TS]

  there's nothing they can do school now [TS]

  yeah that's why I didn't feel like I [TS]

  really want to talk about these things [TS]

  but we are mentioning it now ignore [TS]

  normally i'm very happy just having [TS]

  their be like a big gap between the [TS]

  videos like I have I have intentionally [TS]

  set up my career in such a way so that [TS]

  big gaps between videos are normal [TS]

  things like nobody super surprised when [TS]

  there's a big gap between cgpgrey videos [TS]

  the expectation is there will be a gap [TS]

  exactly which is the inverse to most [TS]

  people [TS]

  exactly yeah always playing with fire [TS]

  with that YouTube algorithm with these [TS]

  big gaps which i think one day will come [TS]

  to bite me in the ass [TS]

  hopefully not not today but I do just [TS]

  want to mention it on on this show [TS]

  because I feel like there have been some [TS]

  times because we are having this like [TS]

  meeting and discussing our work where [TS]

  I've been sort of talking around thing [TS]

  in a way that doesn't make it helpful or [TS]

  clear to the listener and so I think [TS]

  that was one of the things that was also [TS]

  happening on the last show about like [TS]

  why was I had doing a bad job of [TS]

  explaining year of new is because i felt [TS]

  like i was talking around a thing that I [TS]

  didn't really want to directly talk [TS]

  about and so I think that's why we're [TS]

  just mentioning it now to to generalize [TS]

  out to the listener that I do i do think [TS]

  that there's there's something to be [TS]

  aware of and and to just just really [TS]

  like learn from from something like this [TS]

  which is the guy had this really rough [TS]

  time but as as far as these things go i [TS]

  could not have been better prepared for [TS]

  it because this is the kind of thing [TS]

  that if you're self-employed you sort of [TS]

  have to set up the business to be like [TS]

  this and to be ready for the possibility [TS]

  of you having to step away from stuff [TS]

  for a while and so this this is part of [TS]

  the reason why i like my youtube channel [TS]

  is run in this particular way where the [TS]

  videos come up somewhat randomly because [TS]

  i am aware that the process of creating [TS]

  them is is not building widgets and [TS]

  sometimes there are delays and that's [TS]

  just built into the system and I've said [TS]

  before one at one of one of by far and [TS]

  away the best decisions and probably [TS]

  costly as decisions I have ever made was [TS]

  to switch the patronage on my youtube [TS]

  channel from building monthly to [TS]

  building when a video goes out and even [TS]

  then not every video only the videos [TS]

  that i select I cannot tell you what a [TS]

  huge mental relief that was like [TS]

  especially during this time and like [TS]

  that is a decision that has has paid [TS]

  paid if not actual monetary dividends [TS]

  like working life dividends because then [TS]

  i feel like i am NOT I am NOT taxing the [TS]

  people upon which my living depends [TS]

  needlessly yeah right because there [TS]

  would have been what like two or three [TS]

  payments come out right exactly there [TS]

  there would have been something like [TS]

  three payments for what should have been [TS]

  three videos and nothing and you know my [TS]

  my patron was was briefly setup like [TS]

  that in the very beginning and I loathe [TS]

  did I hated it like it made it made my [TS]

  life unhappy i hated the feeling of a [TS]

  building going out and people getting [TS]

  nothing in return [TS]

  i I just I loathed it and but but here's [TS]

  the thing was one of the things that [TS]

  occurred when i was doing those changes [TS]

  is I realized okay if I'm going to do [TS]

  this what I need to have in place is a [TS]

  bigger emergency fund so i can get [TS]

  through potentially longer periods of [TS]

  time and it was also then thinking about [TS]

  some kind of income diversification [TS]

  which ended up being podcast like the [TS]

  very podcast that i'm talking on right [TS]

  now and what like what is one of the big [TS]

  advantages of doing a podcast one of the [TS]

  huge advantages especially if you're [TS]

  working with mike is it's a hell of a [TS]

  lot less work than producing a youtube [TS]

  video this is not a recommendation by [TS]

  the way and this this is this is the [TS]

  thing it's like okay [TS]

  even during like a rough time I can [TS]

  still make some podcasts because doing [TS]

  podcasts as much easier and so this is [TS]

  the kind of thing of like structuring a [TS]

  business to be okay even if you're not [TS]

  doing great and so it's like okay [TS]

  cgpgrey hasn't made a video in a long [TS]

  time but there's still content coming [TS]

  out like there's still podcast coming [TS]

  out and for the nature of my business i [TS]

  think that that is an important thing to [TS]

  not just drop off the face of the earth [TS]

  for six months and then we know then pop [TS]

  back up later and I i mentioned this and [TS]

  I think it's important to mention [TS]

  because this is the hard part about [TS]

  being self-employed is really being able [TS]

  to prepare yourself for these kinds of [TS]

  things and being able to structure your [TS]

  business in such a way so that it's [TS]

  ready to absorb these sorts of problems [TS]

  and I think sometimes there are people [TS]

  who wants to become self-employed and [TS]

  they're only ever thinking of all of the [TS]

  upsides [TS]

  but you really have to be aware of how [TS]

  much your life is in your own hands when [TS]

  you're self-employed and then like that [TS]

  is in the best of all possible ways and [TS]

  that is also in the worst of all [TS]

  possible ways that is a is a big big [TS]

  scary decision that you really have to [TS]

  be prepared for I am lucky in that I [TS]

  have a co-founder blue and my co-founder [TS]

  has me so our business has two people if [TS]

  one person cannot do something by and [TS]

  large the other person is able to to [TS]

  pick that up and part of the thinking [TS]

  for me in us getting an assistant to [TS]

  help with arranging and dealing with [TS]

  with sponsors is another part of that [TS]

  because that's one of the things that I [TS]

  have the majority of visibility over and [TS]

  it would be great to have the companies [TS]

  that we work with familiar with another [TS]

  person and the process that if they [TS]

  can't get ahold of me there's someone [TS]

  that they can talk to little so like [TS]

  this is another step in that and it's [TS]

  something you know we could just have to [TS]

  even do this [TS]

  that's not the way that we want to do it [TS]

  we want to kind of broaden it out and [TS]

  make some of this not the stuff that we [TS]

  do but another thing that comes as a [TS]

  benefit of that is having this other [TS]

  person [TS]

  visit who has visibility on the process [TS]

  to help deal with things when we can't [TS]

  whoo-hoo so there is a benefit there and [TS]

  also you know of all my shows having [TS]

  co-host there is another person who can [TS]

  help [TS]

  there is another person i can put more [TS]

  time in lab and or in in many cases [TS]

  there is another person who can host a [TS]

  show with somebody else they can get I [TS]

  can get someone to fill in for me and it [TS]

  can just carry on as normal so there are [TS]

  you know what my business is structured [TS]

  a little better than your video part of [TS]

  the business in that way to say with the [TS]

  podcast part you can lean on me if you [TS]

  need to all i'll pick up the reins and [TS]

  do more if you need it [TS]

  but with the videos so much of it comes [TS]

  from you [TS]

  I mean you have your animator now who [TS]

  helps but there's nobody at the start [TS]

  process there's nobody in the script [TS]

  writing process is just you and that is [TS]

  a huge bottleneck you know you just got [TS]

  the the way relays setup i can I had [TS]

  been a listener long after that you can [TS]

  definitely be wearing oh there's times [TS]

  when you were Steven are there more or [TS]

  less like in it it's you know that [TS]

  that's how these things work and the [TS]

  Machine of relay is you know vast beyond [TS]

  just you Mike now and and that is [TS]

  definitely an advantage but if you're [TS]

  like a freelancer and it's just you i [TS]

  like that that is a occasionally [TS]

  precarious situation [TS]

  yeah the youtube videos are like being a [TS]

  freelancer I don't need to be on the air [TS]

  for the company to be making money [TS]

  anymore and that wasn't how it was when [TS]

  it started right right and that is a [TS]

  good thing [TS]

  oh yeah yeah it it totally is it totally [TS]

  is a good thing but yeah without without [TS]

  a doubt for my youtube channel the [TS]

  script writing process is the biggest [TS]

  bottleneck like it has always been the [TS]

  biggest bottleneck and until I bring on [TS]

  some apprentices right it's always going [TS]

  to be the biggest bottleneck please do [TS]

  not send any submissions in for this job [TS]

  application better map those fundamental [TS]

  around the red and today's show is [TS]

  brought to you by our friends at casper [TS]

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  thank you so much to Casper for the [TS]

  support of the show we have identified [TS]

  that the script writing is maybe the the [TS]

  biggest issue here in that is currently [TS]

  something that you you don't have any [TS]

  help would help with in your whole [TS]

  pantheon of work [TS]

  pantheon I know it's the best thing i [TS]

  could think of at the time I like every [TS]

  other her is there is somebody else [TS]

  involved little podcast editing plus [TS]

  production animation posting everything [TS]

  else has another person now which [TS]

  touches it effects it and can pick up [TS]

  slack from you [TS]

  mmm now there is one big issue with [TS]

  scriptwriting that I don't think we've [TS]

  ever touched on before which is writer's [TS]

  block i use cgpgrey currently suffering [TS]

  from writer's block [TS]

  no I wouldn't i wouldn't say that are [TS]

  you writing scripts [TS]

  ok so i don't believe in the existence [TS]

  of writer's block however i'm currently [TS]

  struggling to right now as I guess that [TS]

  that's a different they look at you like [TS]

  you're trying to frame this in a [TS]

  particular way that I disagree with [TS]

  arrived [TS]

  I'm only talking about when i said [TS]

  before like oh you have like big [TS]

  disasters like I'm made of multiple [TS]

  things all of this stuff happened right [TS]

  around the time that I was experienced [TS]

  much more like what I would describe as [TS]

  a kind of burn out there was a running [TS]

  joke in the reddit where people like oh [TS]

  wow look at this new piece of content [TS]

  and i would say don't get used to it now [TS]

  like I know the content will keep coming [TS]

  forever like know people that won't [TS]

  because i was really aware like 2016 was [TS]

  it was a very interesting year in in my [TS]

  working life [TS]

  it was the most successful year in in my [TS]

  working life thus far and it was also in [TS]

  terms of years where I have been [TS]

  self-employed it was the year that had [TS]

  by far and away the most deadlines in it [TS]

  of some kind [TS]

  anytime there's like sponsorships [TS]

  there's some kind of deadlines there are [TS]

  other deadlines behind the scenes that [TS]

  people don't see these two things I [TS]

  think are are very much related like [TS]

  deadlines and the financial success of [TS]

  the business between videos podcasts [TS]

  every other week some other things [TS]

  behind the scenes 2015 gray signed 2016 [TS]

  gray up for too many things [TS]

  Chuck this is just it right like 2015 [TS]

  grades like add 2016 gray he'll be fine [TS]

  handling all of these things and by the [TS]

  end of the year sort of after the rules [TS]

  for rulers video I was really feeling [TS]

  like man it has been just like too much [TS]

  to constantly and and that's what i said [TS]

  like starting in the summer I was doing [TS]

  a little summer review i was already [TS]

  making plans and and scheming for a [TS]

  20-17 that would have fewer deadlines in [TS]

  a whole bunch of different ways that's [TS]

  like this year is great for the business [TS]

  but it is not a sustainable thing for me [TS]

  over the long term like this this can't [TS]

  go on forever because i will just be [TS]

  totally burned out [TS]

  and so I like almost made it to the end [TS]

  of the year but but around November time [TS]

  I was beginning to feel like i am i am [TS]

  just a little burned out from this [TS]

  schedule that I have set for myself this [TS]

  is this is too much and then things i [TS]

  mentioned before happened and so that [TS]

  the combination of those two things have [TS]

  this essentially meant that like I have [TS]

  done almost no productive writing work [TS]

  that's the situation that I was in [TS]

  really just up until just a few days ago [TS]

  sort of is is like also dealing with the [TS]

  fallout from like a kind of burnout from [TS]

  over over-scheduling but what I mean [TS]

  what the ideas that we keep on out from [TS]

  creation perspective just burned out [TS]

  from a production perspective I don't [TS]

  really understand what the difference is [TS]

  between those things [TS]

  well I mean if you're burned out from an [TS]

  ideas perspective just sitting down to [TS]

  do something and you can't do anything [TS]

  but if you'll just burn out from [TS]

  production perspective you're having [TS]

  ideas but you just don't have the desire [TS]

  to sit down actualize them seems like a [TS]

  distinction without a difference i think [TS]

  it's a clear difference but yep [TS]

  well the thing is that i have i have a a [TS]

  long list of prioritized and order [TS]

  ordered ideas for the videos that i want [TS]

  to make Ryan there's like a i have a [TS]

  like a top five list of like here's the [TS]

  next videos that I want to do tons of [TS]

  notes on them and and stuff to work on [TS]

  them but the difference is like what [TS]

  what i think is an interesting [TS]

  phenomenon is what what i have come to [TS]

  call over my working life a bounce rate [TS]

  and so this is this is the way I think [TS]

  about going into work in the mornings is [TS]

  get up going in like I'm going to go [TS]

  write something this is the first thing [TS]

  that I try to do in the day and some [TS]

  mornings I just I kind of bounced off [TS]

  the work [TS]

  this is the this is the best word i have [TS]

  come up with to describe this phenomenon [TS]

  people always talk about something like [TS]

  procrastinate [TS]

  Shin this word holds no real value for [TS]

  me i don't think the things that people [TS]

  are talking about when they talk about [TS]

  procrastination of the things i'm doing [TS]

  i'm in the office and I want to write [TS]

  but I just sort of don't and but on [TS]

  there like I'm all like I'm all set like [TS]

  the routine has gone and just nothing [TS]

  happens and for the entirety of of my [TS]

  writing life this has always been a [TS]

  thing that occurs sometimes and so I [TS]

  think of it as like a bounce rate that [TS]

  if you are doing any kind of creative [TS]

  work there is going to be some portion [TS]

  of bouncing off of that work like how [TS]

  you wanted to do the thing but nothing [TS]

  happened was like why because creativity [TS]

  is mysterious eh what's going on here [TS]

  oh yeah what's going on here it's like [TS]

  you're applying your logic to these [TS]

  situations little logic [TS]

  situations little logic [TS]

  is anchor and what you're saying I agree [TS]

  of it but what you are calling bounce [TS]

  rate people call writers block like you [TS]

  are sitting to produce a script and on [TS]

  that day maybe that week [TS]

  nothing is coming and you're just [TS]

  talking it down to this is fine this is [TS]

  normal this is how it goes [TS]

  people categorize it as writers block I [TS]

  think when they feel like the situation [TS]

  is dire and are out of their hands but [TS]

  you consider it as something which is [TS]

  part of the creation process and you're [TS]

  fine with it [TS]

  that's how i'm reading this situation [TS]

  yeah i guess i guess because i think it [TS]

  it's out of my hands but not dire at all [TS]

  like it's just part of the things like [TS]

  it's just part of the process this is [TS]

  just maybe the way that you are good at [TS]

  detaching emotion from situations like [TS]

  that is a a good skill that you have [TS]

  mean that you're able to just be like [TS]

  this one where other people would maybe [TS]

  worry about it more [TS]

  maybe you're right maybe you're right [TS]

  about that I guess it's also it's also [TS]

  think that i am aware of always liked [TS]

  comes and goes in various waves [TS]

  yeah but a lot of people worry that one [TS]

  at one point it's never gonna go right [TS]

  that the the block comes and that's it [TS]

  right i think that is a fear that people [TS]

  have about their work [TS]

  yeah but that's why they should [TS]

  diversify their business into podcasting [TS]

  right this is what if you see what I [TS]

  mean no it's like you you see things you [TS]

  see things the way that you see things [TS]

  and that the exact same thing that [TS]

  somebody else sees but they they react [TS]

  to it differently [TS]

  mm right I feel like my way of thinking [TS]

  about this is correct and superior your [TS]

  way is rational and not everybody is as [TS]

  rational as here [TS]

  I mean it would be very curious to hear [TS]

  from other people who do any kind of [TS]

  creative work like what like what [TS]

  they're like how they internalize it is [TS]

  very interesting that I happen to be [TS]

  like because of [TS]

  because of my line of work I happen to [TS]

  be in a position where i can have [TS]

  conversations with other successful [TS]

  people who do creative work in various [TS]

  fields again and you find it interesting [TS]

  that almost everybody who does this kind [TS]

  of thing has their own way of describing [TS]

  what is it that they're doing that's [TS]

  like specific to them and I feel like Oh [TS]

  even even that must be part of the [TS]

  process like it's that it's such a [TS]

  strange thing to try to produce any kind [TS]

  of creative output that is going to be [TS]

  consumed by a large number of people [TS]

  that it i think it ends up becoming a [TS]

  very internalized process for anybody [TS]

  who's doing it and they're like [TS]

  everybody has their own like weird [TS]

  language or description of how they do [TS]

  these things and like I feel like this [TS]

  using this word bounce like this is this [TS]

  just feels like i was the word in my [TS]

  brain that feels like the right thing [TS]

  that is like go into the office but sort [TS]

  of like bounce out of the office and I [TS]

  got nothing occurred [TS]

  okay well it's it's like it's like a [TS]

  batting average [TS]

  you know it's just like well you're [TS]

  expecting to do perfect things every [TS]

  time [TS]

  well you're crazy nobody does that [TS]

  nobody you ever have spoken to does that [TS]

  it is it's like bizarre beyond [TS]

  rationality to expect some kind of [TS]

  perfect hit rate every single time [TS]

  alright here's the thing right there are [TS]

  there are people that work differently [TS]

  to you and have different schedules and [TS]

  who have i would say maybe luxuries in [TS]

  the way that they work which means that [TS]

  they have to be creative of but can't [TS]

  treat it like this is fine [TS]

  the work will come so used two examples [TS]

  i will use me who and then i will use [TS]

  general person who works and creative [TS]

  field for their jobs and in a company [TS]

  who so i'll start with me there is off [TS]

  joke like an often told joke on the show [TS]

  that i love shared Jules who I don't [TS]

  necessarily love shows [TS]

  but I choose that my business will run [TS]

  on one I make the choice because that [TS]

  makes more sense to me it's easier to [TS]

  plan my shows run on Churchill's all of [TS]

  my podcasts they run on charges and that [TS]

  makes it easier for me to book [TS]

  advertising in a way that uncomfortable [TS]

  with it's not necessary but I figure it [TS]

  to be for me a more realistic way of [TS]

  getting my work done there are times [TS]

  when a show is looming and i have no [TS]

  idea I have no inspiration who I have no [TS]

  topics some weeks there is no news [TS]

  who what do you do so I work in a couple [TS]

  of different ways sometimes I despair [TS]

  because there is nothing and I have [TS]

  nothing planned [TS]

  sometimes I work in advance in that if I [TS]

  am feeling particularly inspired i will [TS]

  make notes and I have this for all of my [TS]

  shows lots of notes of ideas and planned [TS]

  out topics like I have topics that i [TS]

  have had planned out for this show in [TS]

  outline form for over a year when they [TS]

  sit there waiting to even be pulled in a [TS]

  time when one of us is inspired to talk [TS]

  about that thing or a time when we have [TS]

  no other inspiration of any kind of [TS]

  drawing us towards something so I have [TS]

  these planned out things that are ready [TS]

  so for someone like me who goes through [TS]

  these problems and but is able to work [TS]

  in in the way that i work i will have [TS]

  things kind of in the chamber ready to [TS]

  be pulled in malaria definitely times [TS]

  when i don't and there are times when I [TS]

  am lucky in the type of work that I do [TS]

  though I can ask our audience what do [TS]

  you want to hear me talk about and that [TS]

  is a very valuable thing so like that is [TS]

  a thing for me or it's like I have [TS]

  decided i want to be my work to be on a [TS]

  schedule that there is a an expectation [TS]

  set by a calendar as to when the work [TS]

  will be completed [TS]

  and i have understood that and i have [TS]

  tried to use my experience to build the [TS]

  business the way that I want right so [TS]

  that is that is a difference to you but [TS]

  a solution but there is another option [TS]

  so like the the third root of this which [TS]

  is a person who is creative but for [TS]

  somebody else like they they work that [TS]

  in a job and they are employed and they [TS]

  have to be creative [TS]

  what was that person do and then that is [TS]

  tricky because i'm very aware of that [TS]

  not everybody has the luxuries to choose [TS]

  the things that I want to do in the way [TS]

  that we do so somebody is burnout they [TS]

  haven't taken a vacation in awhile and [TS]

  they're being given a thing that they're [TS]

  not very passionate about that is a real [TS]

  problem right that they have [TS]

  expectations put on them and they have [TS]

  timelines and they have deadlines and [TS]

  they have people that want things in [TS]

  some way and they are able to just be [TS]

  like now I'm going to wait until it [TS]

  comes to me because maybe it's due in a [TS]

  week that's tricky right i think it's [TS]

  it's terrible the way many professions [TS]

  treat creative employees like it's just [TS]

  a faucet [TS]

  yeah exactly like they're like they're [TS]

  in there in the you know they're in a [TS]

  factory cranking out widgets all day and [TS]

  widgets are a beautiful ideas right that [TS]

  are new in the world [TS]

  it's like okay well but that's not how [TS]

  it works and what well i think is is so [TS]

  interesting is how many creative fields [TS]

  have a very natural ebb and flow to them [TS]

  again if you talk to anybody who works [TS]

  in TV and movie writing it that is a [TS]

  prime example like why do like why do TV [TS]

  seasons exist one of the huge reasons is [TS]

  you can't have a script writing team [TS]

  just working all year right that it is [TS]

  like they just can't do it and if you if [TS]

  you make them do it you get terrible TV [TS]

  at the end of it because it's like [TS]

  you're gonna burn out your writers if [TS]

  you ask them to write every day for the [TS]

  whole rest of the year i think it's i [TS]

  find it interesting that like lots of [TS]

  creative areas have this kind of ebb and [TS]

  flow like it's a very it's a very [TS]

  natural thing and [TS]

  it is something that i am aware can i am [TS]

  the most fortunate person in the world [TS]

  in this position but but let's say like [TS]

  I am aware that let's just say like a [TS]

  lot of people who work on youtube that [TS]

  YouTube does not have any kind of ebb [TS]

  and flow to it [TS]

  everything about the way you tube is [TS]

  setup is almost like an employer who [TS]

  constantly wants new things produced all [TS]

  the time and as I i think that for [TS]

  individual creators that's that's not [TS]

  necessarily a great thing over the long [TS]

  run and I think that's also why I do i [TS]

  do know some some channels that sort of [TS]

  like rotate out teams of people who are [TS]

  producing content for them small BF [TS]

  because it's the same thing like you [TS]

  you're gonna burn out people if you're [TS]

  asking them to just work all of the time [TS]

  and this is a thing that you see on [TS]

  youtube sometimes where where various [TS]

  creators will have to put up a video of [TS]

  like I'm really sorry but like it's just [TS]

  been has been too much for to know that [TS]

  it's like they kind of are forced to [TS]

  take a break because they push [TS]

  themselves like too far and too fast and [TS]

  like that that is very much the thing [TS]

  that I'm like I'm totally trying to [TS]

  avoid is like I never want to do that I [TS]

  want to do stuff at a sustainable pace [TS]

  but that means i can't possibly treat it [TS]

  like stuff's going to come out at the [TS]

  exact right time every time I get it [TS]

  just I think creative work fundamentally [TS]

  doesn't work like that and I attacked I [TS]

  do not view employers who who treated [TS]

  that way in a in a very favorable light [TS]

  I think that's the that's the wrong way [TS]

  to look at this kind of work when i [TS]

  started my youtube channel i was [TS]

  treating it very much like all of my [TS]

  other work then that I would have a [TS]

  schedule that I would here too and it [TS]

  was basically weekly i have since just [TS]

  decided to myself that I'm going not [TS]

  going to do it that way and that i'm [TS]

  going to maybe be a little bit more like [TS]

  you and i am i'm treating this as a [TS]

  project but I don't want to just be [TS]

  pumping out content i want to make [TS]

  things when I have an inspiration to do [TS]

  so [TS]

  so that's what I'm doing now with my [TS]

  with my youtube channel so like I've as [TS]

  i have seen that and I something that [TS]

  I'm trying to be comfortable with [TS]

  because I'm not comfortable with it just [TS]

  because of my working routines let me [TS]

  tell us on the mic even if you are very [TS]

  different working routines see you're [TS]

  working routines are much more like mine [TS]

  it is still a deeply uncomfortable thing [TS]

  to not have regular output that is that [TS]

  is one of the trade-offs for this is you [TS]

  still feel that like I'm still always [TS]

  aware that there is an audience there [TS]

  that wants a thing [TS]

  yep it's always it's always going to be [TS]

  uncomfortable but obviously I think it's [TS]

  a I think it's a very good decision to [TS]

  not build in the regular schedule don't [TS]

  need another one [TS]

  yeah you you don't need another one and [TS]

  I mean just in general for anybody who's [TS]

  doing the YouTube stuff like this is [TS]

  this is one case where I like a deeply [TS]

  disagree with YouTube standard advice to [TS]

  new creators were like make sure you [TS]

  have a schedule and teacher audience [TS]

  that you uploaded every tuesday at five [TS]

  o'clock right as like I so I say who [TS]

  strongly disagree with that as as a [TS]

  piece of advice like I don't think it's [TS]

  a good idea to upload a video just [TS]

  because this is the time where you're [TS]

  supposed to upload a video i i i really [TS]

  really deeply disagree with that and I'm [TS]

  glad to hear that you are also going to [TS]

  go down the path of not feeling like [TS]

  every sunday at eight is going to be a [TS]

  new episode of my curly show i also want [TS]

  to offer a couple of pieces of advice [TS]

  for people who work in a creative filled [TS]

  as part of an organization if you are [TS]

  feeling like this level of burnout [TS]

  there's one thing you should could try [TS]

  and do pay attention to the people that [TS]

  you are delivering your work too and try [TS]

  and notice from them what they consider [TS]

  to be the base level of acceptance and [TS]

  sometimes try and work just to that like [TS]

  have have a real sense for what you know [TS]

  if you're turning in something you don't [TS]

  think is very good and they seemed okay [TS]

  with it [TS]

  just pay attention to what that looks [TS]

  like [TS]

  because later when you need to just turn [TS]

  something out who you there might have a [TS]

  better understanding for what might fly [TS]

  who because a lot of times people that [TS]

  are creative are turning in work to [TS]

  people that are not created by nature [TS]

  blue so you might find depending on [TS]

  where you work that people are impressed [TS]

  by something you don't find impressive [TS]

  and it maybe you can just target that [TS]

  that is great advice [TS]

  that's great advice if your boss is a [TS]

  creative person you might be fucked [TS]

  I think this or you might be more [TS]

  creative than them huh that is possible [TS]

  yeah definitely talk about that is great [TS]

  advice for any kind of job anyways like [TS]

  be aware of what the acceptable level is [TS]

  like that that's your actual target i [TS]

  would say that maybe if you're if you [TS]

  are creative and you work for creative [TS]

  person they may understand more [TS]

  yeah that is possible and that they made [TS]

  that they're more likely to get it and [TS]

  then that you might be able to have some [TS]

  open conversations with them when you're [TS]

  in this type of situation [TS]

  another thing that i would just [TS]

  recommend is that one of the ways to [TS]

  break out a burnout is to change things [TS]

  up is to like refocus your mind and if [TS]

  you have a project work you can just [TS]

  turn something different but that's not [TS]

  how it works but what you could do is [TS]

  maybe start a new side project or hobby [TS]

  that helps get your creative juices [TS]

  flowing into something that's less high [TS]

  stakes then the work that you supposed [TS]

  to be working on and that you can work [TS]

  at a time when you're not supposed to be [TS]

  working and it might help you kind of [TS]

  get back into the creative mode again [TS]

  for some lessons [TS]

  there's some things that I learned from [TS]

  trying to be creative inside of an [TS]

  organization that didn't care for [TS]

  creativity [TS]

  alright so have you been doing anything [TS]

  specifically to help you kind of [TS]

  breakthrough into making videos again or [TS]

  is it now i don't know like we done but [TS]

  no we're not done like [TS]

  but what I what I have what I have done [TS]

  and what I always is find is like the [TS]

  the break glass in case of emergency [TS]

  creativity stuff is bringing out the old [TS]

  paper and a pen my favorite I thought [TS]

  you might like that [TS]

  BSO in in the past week or so I feel [TS]

  like okay I'm going into the office I've [TS]

  been trying to do work but the bounce [TS]

  rate is just unacceptably high and [TS]

  trying to do a bunch of different things [TS]

  blah blah blah but the thing that works [TS]

  for me in the end is essentially giving [TS]

  my brain no options in the world except [TS]

  to do the thing that I wanted to do I [TS]

  feel like this is a key thing about [TS]

  productivity and think trying to [TS]

  accomplish anything [TS]

  it's not about motivation it's not about [TS]

  knuckling down working hard [TS]

  it's about tricking your brain and [TS]

  constraining options and so what I have [TS]

  been doing is I have been going to a a [TS]

  different and new cafe with just a just [TS]

  a pad of a legal paper and a pen and [TS]

  literally nothing else except headphones [TS]

  connected to a song i can loop on my [TS]

  watch [TS]

  ok brain-e with me we're going to sit [TS]

  here and we're going to sit here and we [TS]

  cannot leave until you have done two [TS]

  hours of writing like I don't care what [TS]

  you right brain [TS]

  I don't care at all but we're not [TS]

  leaving until this happens as I guess [TS]

  what [TS]

  under these circumstances where there's [TS]

  literally nothing else in the world to [TS]

  do eventually something will come out [TS]

  and say okay I'm just gonna start [TS]

  writing a stream-of-consciousness here [TS]

  and like this is this all we need to do [TS]

  we're just gonna get the hand moving and [TS]

  that's it [TS]

  and this is this is always my like last [TS]

  resort trick into trying to boot myself [TS]

  back into having a a better actually [TS]

  writing rate so this is the thing I've [TS]

  been working on for a little while [TS]

  and it's pulling me out of it and it is [TS]

  just this is my ultimate kind of last [TS]

  trick is to give the brain no options [TS]

  you have to do the thing brain but [TS]

  that's all there is [TS]

  however there's a thing that like the [TS]

  listener might ask which is why don't [TS]

  you just do this right from the start [TS]

  and I think a key the key thing about [TS]

  creative work is being aware like when [TS]

  do you need to step back for a little [TS]

  while and when i was first to wear like [TS]

  my my bounce rate was just way too high [TS]

  and i wasn't getting any quality writing [TS]

  work done at all [TS]

  ok this this is a time not to push it [TS]

  like don't don't push it too hard when [TS]

  you're not going to get anything out [TS]

  like it feels like you can break [TS]

  something here when it's just not going [TS]

  to happen and so what I did and when I [TS]

  was kind of alluding to last episode is [TS]

  this thing where i have spent a very [TS]

  significant part of January essentially [TS]

  breaking down the entirety of how do i [TS]

  work what are my systems around work how [TS]

  do i use task management how do i [TS]

  organized notes breaking down absolutely [TS]

  everything to nothing and starting over [TS]

  and spending a lot of the the time that [TS]

  I would normally be writing thinking [TS]

  very intentionally about how do i work [TS]

  what am i working towards doing a very [TS]

  intense seasonal review and trying to [TS]

  think of how to structure a 20-17 that [TS]

  is a great 2017 and also sustainable so [TS]

  that's what I've been that's what i've [TS]

  been doing and I would love to talk [TS]

  about that more but we've been talking [TS]

  for a very long time like that we can [TS]

  leave this episode on a cliffhanger [TS]

  is that what this is i think it might be [TS]

  is unprecedented [TS]

  next time on cortex [TS]