Roderick on the Line

Ep. 52: "The Choad Building"


  hello hey John [TS]

  hi Merlin that's going to product back I [TS]

  for some reason my headphones are a lot [TS]

  louder today [TS]

  you sound louder I sounds but I can't [TS]

  hear myself in my headphones so I don't [TS]

  sound any different [TS]

  wow we should we get I don't know no [TS]

  notes i like it it's um it's bold it's [TS]

  bold as love Who am I can I can modulate [TS]

  my voice no no don't do god don't do [TS]

  that okay you sound like Twiggy from the [TS]

  original Buck Rogers biddy biddy [TS]

  speaking of penises [TS]

  I just done a minute ago yeah saw Jimi [TS]

  Hendrix's penis as well as a plaster [TS]

  cast know em do you are do you know [TS]

  Cynthia plaster caster are you familiar [TS]

  with her work [TS]

  I just visited her entirely flash-based [TS]

  site and and looked at its really it's [TS]

  quite a thing I'm not seen it myself but [TS]

  my understanding is that that Jimmy's [TS]

  penis curves to the side or something [TS]

  that has a well flash technology [TS]

  notwithstanding it was just a straight [TS]

  on like side shot [TS]

  OIC it was I don't use this word [TS]

  incorrectly but i think it might be [TS]

  regarded as a chode showed that it is [TS]

  not in the the technical term like a [TS]

  fireplug because it's its considerable [TS]

  yeah it's a long long scale penis but [TS]

  it's it's real big around i don't know i [TS]

  might be the plastic they could get at [TS]

  the time of my but my impression is that [TS]

  a child is shaped like a like a safety [TS]

  cone [TS]

  oh really it tapers that's that but you [TS]

  know what [TS]

  haha i use that word to refer to so many [TS]

  things in my in my short life [TS]

  yeah that's maybe its original meaning [TS]

  is lost a terrific wear what would it [TS]

  was the way that it was explained to me [TS]

  a time when these words were achieving a [TS]

  lot of cultural cachet [TS]

  and I'm just gonna tell you what i was [TS]

  told because there's a lot of these [TS]

  kinds of things you hear and sticks in [TS]

  your head even though it doesn't make [TS]

  sense i was told that it's a penis [TS]

  that's bigger around than it is long oh [TS]

  right ok I see what you're saying which [TS]

  which sounds like a child's block or [TS]

  something I mean you know something [TS]

  cylindrical i guess but yeah like a like [TS]

  a like a wheel of cheese just like a [TS]

  Japanese man haha you have a Japanese [TS]

  chod that's a good word there's a lot of [TS]

  words like that I I don't make sure that [TS]

  i'm using correctly that's a great word [TS]

  that sounds great yeah although it's not [TS]

  a word I mean it showed is not a word [TS]

  that you would say use when you were [TS]

  meeting to your local candidate for [TS]

  lieutenant governor [TS]

  no i mean like yeah you wouldn't like [TS]

  shake somebody's hand and then find a [TS]

  way to slip children with the [TS]

  conversation do you think he'd be [TS]

  familiar with the term depends i know [TS]

  what I what state probably right i bet i [TS]

  bet he would I better which I think the [TS]

  problem is that somebody in the room [TS]

  without you I bet you could I bet you [TS]

  get a lot of like snickers in the room [TS]

  or either that or you're the guy that's [TS]

  standing right behind the lieutenant [TS]

  governor whose job it is to like move [TS]

  him from conversation the conversation [TS]

  all right with his handler his handler [TS]

  his handler would lean forward and say [TS]

  that's not what showed me answer and [TS]

  then that and then you would have a [TS]

  chance to correct yourself because they [TS]

  attack gubernatorial candidate would [TS]

  already be talking to three old ladies [TS]

  this press conference is over i could [TS]

  really benefit from having a handler [TS]

  oh my god oh I i sink into my chair in [TS]

  frustrated exhaustion at the thought [TS]

  that I don't have a handler [TS]

  yeah I've tried I've sought out handlers [TS]

  it sounds like you have on some level [TS]

  sideout handlers but i haven't funny but [TS]

  you can handle me [TS]

  well you know that the I my feeling [TS]

  about you and and some of my friends who [TS]

  have been successful enough to attempt [TS]

  to hire someone to help them [TS]

  who is that i have never heard of I've [TS]

  never heard a story about that but that [TS]

  that didn't sound scary where the person [TS]

  did not get what what it what it took to [TS]

  handle you [TS]

  you know but that the upper the person [TS]

  whomever of all my friends whoever they [TS]

  hire to handle them they end up having [TS]

  to handle the person that they hired to [TS]

  handle them handling the handler you're [TS]

  handling the handler and the handler is [TS]

  not the handlers just passing that [TS]

  handling through back to you with all [TS]

  the good parts filtered out and yes [TS]

  you're just like this isn't I'm handling [TS]

  now I'm handling myself for more poorly [TS]

  and i'm also having to handle this jerk [TS]

  this is a big top is big series of [TS]

  topics but yes I totally agree i have i [TS]

  have attempted to find handlers [TS]

  professionally you know and personally [TS]

  and it's just been very hard for what [TS]

  you're the reason you describe which is [TS]

  first of all you have to want to be [TS]

  handled and you have to be open to the [TS]

  changes required to make a handler [TS]

  effective and even if you've got all the [TS]

  money in the world if you if you don't [TS]

  want to be handled [TS]

  you're not gonna have a good handler and [TS]

  unless you're like a roger waters like [TS]

  Pink Floyd situation where you know like [TS]

  the titular pink you and you are see [TS]

  such a basket case you know the election [TS]

  don't you think shane macgowan probably [TS]

  has a cat has a handler [TS]

  oh yeah but shane macgowan handler has a [TS]

  fire hose and like a series of like very [TS]

  large tongs have a tiger with anyone [TS]

  wakes him up with the hose and then just [TS]

  whip them into the shower you left [TS]

  yesterday I i decided i don't know why i [TS]

  had I'm i honestly don't know why i [TS]

  haven't done this in the last four years [TS]

  i started looking online at office space [TS]

  for myself away from my home and I was [TS]

  going through all the different [TS]

  neighborhoods of the city and think [TS]

  you're imagining myself getting up in [TS]

  the morning and commuting over to this [TS]

  other neighborhood where I would go sit [TS]

  in a in a room with a window and the and [TS]

  the whole point of me being there would [TS]

  be that i would write [TS]

  and I was trying to trying to picture [TS]

  like okay do I want to be in a space [TS]

  where it's a kind of creative office [TS]

  space where there are other creative [TS]

  people like painters and and you know [TS]

  and dance choreographers and and and [TS]

  have a have a space in a place like that [TS]

  where I can come out and stand kind of [TS]

  leaning in the doorway of my uh my [TS]

  office with a cup of coffee in my hand [TS]

  waiting for somebody with clay [TS]

  undershirt consider laughs so like the [TS]

  school in same where you put your head [TS]

  on the door in there the lady stretching [TS]

  yeah it's hard and there be someone in a [TS]

  beret painting [TS]

  yeah and i would say what's a metaphor [TS]

  for what's the word for when a penis is [TS]

  a wider around it is long and then [TS]

  though the lady stretching would look up [TS]

  and go chod and I don't chod thank you [TS]

  and then go back to writing do I want to [TS]

  space like that or do I want a space [TS]

  where I'm like up in a garret and nobody [TS]

  can nobody can get to me and I Anna [TS]

  about it but like somewhere underneath [TS]

  me there's a there are people using saws [TS]

  so there's that sound like what kind of [TS]

  you know like all right window or do I [TS]

  want to actually go downtown where [TS]

  literal chodes are working in the [TS]

  insurance and mortgage industry and rent [TS]

  office space in a in a bit chilled [TS]

  building in the building where where I [TS]

  walked you know where late in the [TS]

  morning I'm like crowding through the [TS]

  front door with guys who are who have [TS]

  like guys and overcoats they're holding [TS]

  folded up newspapers and measuring guys [TS]

  that have suspenders on under the suit [TS]

  jacket but they call them braces and [TS]

  dont like there's a lady at asking maybe [TS]

  security guard and they say good morning [TS]

  mr. chod as a security guard morning mr. [TS]

  toad [TS]

  good morning mr. toad and then I take [TS]

  the elevator up to the side like you [TS]

  Willis and good morning to you shall we [TS]

  pick our usual winter one dollar [TS]

  haha nice mr. Roderick mr. Valentine [TS]

  surprise that's what I and then go and [TS]

  like to maybe be like the secret guy [TS]

  working in one of those cubicles that is [TS]

  actually working that's actually writing [TS]

  articles about or whatever it is and [TS]

  then do whatever it is that I do [TS]

  whatever it is that I do whatever [TS]

  writing it is i think i'm i'm gonna do [TS]

  but so I was toying with all these ideas [TS]

  and I honestly couldn't decide there was [TS]

  a part of me that as antisocial as i am [TS]

  a part of me that the only the whole [TS]

  reason I be doing this is to be putting [TS]

  myself out into the actual world like I [TS]

  don't need it's not that I just need [TS]

  some physical distance from this room [TS]

  here full of a this room full of real [TS]

  dolls with that I have here in my [TS]

  upstairs [TS]

  I I actually kinda need to be out in the [TS]

  world where I'm getting coffee and there [TS]

  are other ppl bear this is it yeah i'm [TS]

  so glad you brought this up this is a [TS]

  huge challenge I face this in many many [TS]

  times with many different things and [TS]

  your ear it sounds like you're on the [TS]

  horns of a dilemma because just by how [TS]

  very yeah you don't be able to get off [TS]

  those horns believe it you've got on the [TS]

  one hand you're i'm going to get to a [TS]

  bigger point here but I think what [TS]

  you're saying in some ways is do I want [TS]

  obviously what you're looking for here [TS]

  is a second place your place you need a [TS]

  place that's not the room with the [TS]

  regular leather chair doesn't mean that [TS]

  you can't bring the chair with you [TS]

  although I would just personally I would [TS]

  just have it removed permanently but but [TS]

  you know on the one hand you realize you [TS]

  need to change you need someplace else [TS]

  to get your work done [TS]

  there's the work that you do and so the [TS]

  question becomes and think about those [TS]

  different things that you're describing [TS]

  on the one here saying do I want to be [TS]

  surrounded with these creative people [TS]

  they're probably a little fruity and [TS]

  that will drive my creativity do I want [TS]

  to go somewhere there's more in keeping [TS]

  with my theoretically blue-collar [TS]

  background somewhere where you would be [TS]

  around people throwing fish or doing [TS]

  magic tricks for standing very still [TS]

  looking like a statue [TS]

  I imagine imagine that scene in the [TS]

  billy joel music video allentown weather [TS]

  guys a moving big trenches all [TS]

  and then you pan up and there's like a [TS]

  there's a office manager up above on a [TS]

  railing he's wearing a tie in his pants [TS]

  are pulled up kind of pretty high [TS]

  uh-huh i would have the office next to [TS]

  that guy ok but you would be begin now [TS]

  and the one in the in the first scenario [TS]

  you would be surrounded by the sort of [TS]

  creative people who probably are [TS]

  let's be honest I'm probably making very [TS]

  much but last-chance people mhm mhm [TS]

  that's not real welder and and then on [TS]

  the other hand you're saying do I want [TS]

  to be somewhere where I'm really doing [TS]

  capital w work because I'm surrounded by [TS]

  people who are going to come on the [TS]

  fruit if I'm not you know writing [TS]

  writing responses to people from [TS]

  Aerosmith right and and then on the [TS]

  other hand you're saying do I want to be [TS]

  somewhere where I can do my work in [TS]

  peace [TS]

  maybe something somewhere with a [TS]

  clawfoot bathtub but you know ya know [TS]

  that another part of the problem [TS]

  solution we mul you just added a whole [TS]

  new wrinkle all right there because [TS]

  here's the thing the big point is what [TS]

  is it that you're running away from are [TS]

  running toward what is the barrier [TS]

  you're trying to do for a living and is [TS]

  which of these barriers do you want to [TS]

  get rid of because you might just need a [TS]

  bathroom somewhere if you're gonna [TS]

  record I mean you get a nice kind of you [TS]

  know natural reverb in a room like that [TS]

  but you might just want to have a big [TS]

  bathroom at someone's house or talking [TS]

  their house like in there may be there [TS]

  for you could house-sit for somebody's [TS]

  bigger bathroom set for somebody so I'm [TS]

  wondering though how i would put that [TS]

  into craigslist like wanted this I want [TS]

  to rent your bathroom huh all day wanted [TS]

  i want to write you one all day I want [TS]

  to rent your bathroom large bathroom all [TS]

  day was largely a clawfoot bathtub [TS]

  clawfoot bathtub you don't you need to [TS]

  be cool with strange sounds coming from [TS]

  the bathroom all day and they can't use [TS]

  it right that's part of it is it's your [TS]

  space you're in there [TS]

  yeah we're in there at the crack of noon [TS]

  and you need that space for however long [TS]

  it takes to finish your work [TS]

  well the thing is it would be helpful if [TS]

  that bathroom also had a little [TS]

  kitchenette image oh you should do what [TS]

  i do i just such that link to the coffee [TS]

  dingus that i use here in my office my [TS]

  mouth my office is kind of like a dorm [TS]

  and I'm not by any means saying that you [TS]

  should do anything like the literal [TS]

  personal holocaust that is my office but [TS]

  I've got a little hot water maker here [TS]

  really nice little hot you know makes [TS]

  hot water very quickly [TS]

  yeah i got my sodastream machine I've [TS]

  got a microwave from target and I've got [TS]

  a pretty good-sized dorm fridge no [TS]

  freezer and that's pretty much [TS]

  everything I need to do basic stuff i [TS]

  think that the point when I bring a hot [TS]

  plate i need to hang it up but that's [TS]

  what you need you need space for that [TS]

  you need you need a master bath maybe so [TS]

  my ideal situation is a master bathroom [TS]

  with a kitchenette situated over a [TS]

  Philly cheesesteak sandwich company in [TS]

  an industrial area it that's very that [TS]

  has been kind of colonized by artist so [TS]

  maybe it's still a little transitional [TS]

  write your novel transitional you got [TS]

  your shirtless men with wrenches and [TS]

  ladies stretching yeah so they're ladies [TS]

  stretching over here there are guys like [TS]

  stripping and repainting furniture over [TS]

  here and then across the street [TS]

  this is the furniture they're stripping [TS]

  is a correct they are stripping it was [TS]

  she's she is stretching ok she and that [TS]

  you know just because the woman [TS]

  stretches doesn't mean that she's going [TS]

  to dance on a pole know and then they [TS]

  are stripping furniture they are not [TS]

  personally stripper and and there's a [TS]

  coffee shop across the street where well [TS]

  obviously you've got to have the right [TS]

  tools at hand to do the kind of work [TS]

  that you do you have to have a place to [TS]

  put your tools you have to have a [TS]

  workspace and you have to be surrounded [TS]

  by things that inspire you know maybe [TS]

  window which like a window do i would [TS]

  like the window i need a window who did [TS]

  light because I should I really you can [TS]

  push her not a bathroom you're gonna [TS]

  want a window [TS]

  well but but the but the problem is and [TS]

  I think we hit on this earlier I don't [TS]

  know what I do [TS]

  yeah I am i that i said this to somebody [TS]

  the other day the e here [TS]

  the solution is not your situation is [TS]

  not such that you need to quit your [TS]

  present job in order to pursue your [TS]

  fantasy job [TS]

  because you don't even know your fantasy [TS]

  job is you need to start doing your [TS]

  fantasy job until you're having so much [TS]

  fun and success at that your that you [TS]

  have to quit your real job because your [TS]

  fantasy job has taken over and I and now [TS]

  i'm going to do to podcast at three [TS]

  because you pretty much summed it up but [TS]

  my problem is I'm trying to get myself [TS]

  out of the house to get myself into a [TS]

  workplace so that i can begin to work [TS]

  for the first time in many years [TS]

  who and I and I honestly a part of me [TS]

  both thrills and also despairs at the [TS]

  prospect of sitting down at a desk in a [TS]

  new space that I'm now paying money for [TS]

  and staring out my this window that I [TS]

  that we have just we've agreed i need [TS]

  and saying now what now what do I do now [TS]

  you have to now I turn the computer on [TS]

  there's a certain amount of pressure on [TS]

  you at that point because you have to [TS]

  figure out what your work is your [TS]

  payment that's good that might drive you [TS]

  in some ways but you might even need a [TS]

  transitional free space to go to figure [TS]

  out what it is that you do that could be [TS]

  something where you could have a home [TS]

  maybe you could do something in your [TS]

  barn you could have a transitional space [TS]

  where you going to set up a fridge and [TS]

  maybe have some ladies come out and [TS]

  stretch but you can have an area where [TS]

  you know what I'm saying before you walk [TS]

  across Europe you might want to buy a [TS]

  map [TS]

  yeah but that's the thing when i walked [TS]

  across Europe I did not buy a map first [TS]

  that's true write that down ok and and [TS]

  that wasn't going to watch you're not [TS]

  okay i mean bag notwithstanding that [TS]

  turned out pretty ok yeah that was the [TS]

  bag and the boots both were wrong [TS]

  mm you should have thought more I should [TS]

  have thought long and hard about what [TS]

  you do it differently now [TS]

  I mean if you were that the job today [TS]

  you you could talk to the John of then [TS]

  and give him some tips on material i [TS]

  would say that it's a change the bag [TS]

  change the boots you know I got off the [TS]

  airplane in London and I walked over to [TS]

  the look the little newsagent there at [TS]

  Heathrow and I started looking through [TS]

  his rack of roadmaps trying to figure [TS]

  out what route i was going to spend the [TS]

  next six months six months walking dead [TS]

  but and basically pick the roadmap that [TS]

  was cheapest okay haha and and you know [TS]

  walk out walk out out of his new jet the [TS]

  newsagent shop walked out the pneumatic [TS]

  doors in across the parking lot and then [TS]

  continue to walk in the same direction [TS]

  for six months and and and and bought [TS]

  maps along the way that by that same [TS]

  method just like I would rather I would [TS]

  arrive at the end of one of the map i [TS]

  was i was on the walk until I found a [TS]

  new man he's walking here under mat and [TS]

  I walk around on a map and then I i I'd [TS]

  walk into the nearest place that's old [TS]

  maps and and by-and-by the cheapest map [TS]

  that keep going and that part of it [TS]

  I honestly if i added to do over again I [TS]

  wouldn't tell my i wouldn't tell my [TS]

  young self to do anything any [TS]

  differently because I i don't i don't [TS]

  know how also which is obviously that [TS]

  when you're thrust into a situation is [TS]

  you know it's the same person obviously [TS]

  if you change grown mature you learn [TS]

  more about your work since then but you [TS]

  know you sent me the kind of person who [TS]

  wins I've seen this when you yelled at [TS]

  me to call my mom what about that guys [TS]

  busted a sports car you're someone who [TS]

  and we're gonna talk about that but when [TS]

  you get thrust that's what it's for [TS]

  let me get thrust we get through when [TS]

  you are thrust into a situation you [TS]

  thrive you really are you're like that [TS]

  you're like that marine who has all of [TS]

  those skills you're like that CIA [TS]

  operative who has this the skills just [TS]

  waiting all the time and it's when you [TS]

  it's when you're not in the shit that [TS]

  you're my stress really going well I [TS]

  have one a party what inspired this is I [TS]

  have a friend who works in a corporate [TS]

  office and she is a she is now in a [TS]

  position where she is [TS]

  her boss has just quit and her boss is [TS]

  your baby mama this is the lady I know [TS]

  and and her bosses just quit and her [TS]

  boss was one of these like guys who work [TS]

  there for 15 years and had had weaseled [TS]

  his way into a vice-presidency at this [TS]

  company but but really he's just a frat [TS]

  boy [TS]

  and and I think they gave him the [TS]

  vice-presidency kind of out of a feeling [TS]

  of obligation after he'd been there so [TS]

  long so he quit and went to work [TS]

  somewhere else set up at a at a pet [TS]

  grooming place and right now there's a [TS]

  vacancy in the corporate structure of [TS]

  this company [TS]

  there is no vice president of marketing [TS]

  oh and my uh my friend is I think [TS]

  ideally positioned within the company to [TS]

  assume this job and it isn't maybe that [TS]

  she will be promoted to vice president [TS]

  of marketing but she certainly can be [TS]

  the director of marketing is that is a [TS]

  power vacuum there's a power vacuum and [TS]

  although she isn't incredibly talented [TS]

  and she does not think of herself as [TS]

  someone who is ambitious in there in a [TS]

  corporate way you know she doesn't when [TS]

  she wakes up in the morning she doesn't [TS]

  have she doesn't start sharpening her [TS]

  fingernails to go gash the necks of her [TS]

  competitors you know that's not how she [TS]

  imagines herself although i think she [TS]

  has the competitive skills to to succeed [TS]

  in that world just need to unleash it [TS]

  but in sitting and talking to her about [TS]

  her her work situation or job situation [TS]

  i get very excited because i don't have [TS]

  I do not have the opportunity to [TS]

  exercise those yeah those traits that [TS]

  would succeed in a corporate life and I [TS]

  and I have them you know i would i would [TS]

  love to be in a boardroom situation [TS]

  where other guys were competing to have [TS]

  their plans implemented and i was using [TS]

  all that I know about Machiavelli and [TS]

  the art of war and all this shit that I [TS]

  read over the years and you know and [TS]

  thought about not with any I any [TS]

  intention of ever becoming a corporate [TS]

  person because i wanted to understand [TS]

  how they thought and I and I'd like to [TS]

  read other people's books you know I [TS]

  like to read books that are that are [TS]

  part of the Canon of like special areas [TS]

  right huh where it's like oh you're not [TS]

  gonna be interested in this book this is [TS]

  a book for Hydra hydrologic engineers [TS]

  and I'm like that's actually the kind of [TS]

  book i'm very interested in uh huh [TS]

  what are you guys saying to each other [TS]

  that you don't want other people to know [TS]

  anyway so I'm sitting and talking to her [TS]

  about her her corporate life and I'm [TS]

  kidding y'all you know getting like I'm [TS]

  like listen [TS]

  yeah I felt like I felt like that scene [TS]

  in The Godfather I was like listen the [TS]

  person that person that's that invites [TS]

  you to that meeting right that's the one [TS]

  that wants your head you know the it [TS]

  will what you need to be on the lookout [TS]

  for is the person that agrees with you [TS]

  and then doesn't come to the first [TS]

  meeting that he scheduled because they [TS]

  were too busy [TS]

  that's the person who's going to be [TS]

  trying to for your product Italians a [TS]

  pimp [TS]

  he shall known that it was Barzini all [TS]

  along it was Barzini hola and and she [TS]

  take that council and and understand [TS]

  what that could mean for her me what [TS]

  happened sharp sharp claws yet but boy [TS]

  just even knowing that [TS]

  yeah i think i think it I think it [TS]

  excites her know that I think the [TS]

  challenge of a lot of people our age is [TS]

  that we taught ourselves that are we [TS]

  said to ourselves over and over as a as [TS]

  a culture Generation X did this said to [TS]

  ourselves [TS]

  oh the real things in life that matter [TS]

  to us are our friends and our and music [TS]

  and these things you know we we [TS]

  convinced ourselves that our jobs were [TS]

  just these dumb things that we did that [TS]

  didn't matter because we because we were [TS]

  the ones that really enjoyed life and [TS]

  now we're not gonna be duped by the [TS]

  system that tells you leave the things [TS]

  behind it and become this kind of person [TS]

  yeah i just have to go to my job eight [TS]

  hours a day but I really what i really [TS]

  come alive when it's Miller time and [TS]

  then and then when we become [TS]

  forty-year-olds and we realized wait a [TS]

  minute I'm style whether or not I was [TS]

  duped i'm still spending 40 hours a week [TS]

  in this place and if I don't take the [TS]

  job that I'm doing seriously and if I [TS]

  don't understand the actual culture not [TS]

  the not the fantasy culture of of work [TS]

  but the actual culture of work [TS]

  then I'm then i'm going to top out and [TS]

  then I'm gonna be the one I'm gonna be [TS]

  the 50-year old or 60 year old that's [TS]

  doing a job that 26 year-olds are doing [TS]

  better and you know and I didn't I [TS]

  didn't plan for this [TS]

  you know I just suddenly you wake up and [TS]

  you're living up to your potential [TS]

  exactly and so so i could see the light [TS]

  in her eyes like yeah actually i'm going [TS]

  to go in and I'm going to start i'm [TS]

  gonna start making a list of my enemies [TS]

  and i'm going to start keeping a bucket [TS]

  where I put the hearts of my foes when [TS]

  they come into my office and transform [TS]

  every executive need to photobucket you [TS]

  know what you just have a bucket next [TS]

  year decks and every once awhile your [TS]

  float comes in and tries to the toy [TS]

  store for you just ripped your heart out [TS]

  and stick it in the bucket and the thing [TS]

  is if you to be a really it seems I've [TS]

  never finished the book but it seems to [TS]

  me that you're going to be the Prince [TS]

  you have to not and again with the art [TS]

  of war right and the other for summarize [TS]

  don't do what you think they're what [TS]

  they think you're gonna do you know a [TS]

  lot of ways I mean that's a wall street [TS]

  level summary of it but in all these [TS]

  though the part of the beauty part of [TS]

  somebody who is a smart intelligent lady [TS]

  who is obviously not sharp nails is that [TS]

  is the perfect person to to get into the [TS]

  power vacuum Zach and people they will [TS]

  never know it's coming [TS]

  yeah which one would you have expected a [TS]

  enough support spoiler alert a pagoda [TS]

  last person I would have considered if [TS]

  we go to a different scene like it let [TS]

  millions of dollars the smart one [TS]

  yeah it was always this mark fault i'm [TS]

  saying well the thing is at and and i [TS]

  think the instinct that a lot of people [TS]

  have in that situation is there's a [TS]

  power vacuum i should go to the I should [TS]

  go to my higher ups and ask them if it's [TS]

  cool if I fill in this power vacuum [TS]

  oh and you know oh my what I said to my [TS]

  friend is listen if you do something [TS]

  like that then that's not your power [TS]

  that you will be you will not be using [TS]

  your power or or or growing your power [TS]

  you will be using their power and you're [TS]

  just a proxy that's like getting [TS]

  somebody to sign a form that you climbed [TS]

  a mountain [TS]

  yeah you need to walk into that power [TS]

  back human and and fill it and what some [TS]

  and by the time the higher-ups notice [TS]

  you're already doing the job and then [TS]

  they're like oh we could do a you know [TS]

  we could go search for somebody to fill [TS]

  this role or we could just [TS]

  well this is a big part of being a [TS]

  weasel and and I think the Machiavellian [TS]

  thingy [TS]

  this is it's a lot about how to become a [TS]

  week on a good part about being a weasel [TS]

  I've learned as a weasel is to make [TS]

  things seem like someone else's idea and [TS]

  this has been this is when I've been [TS]

  effective which is pretty much never [TS]

  it's this is work great because what you [TS]

  have to do is a pair of silky almost [TS]

  greasy pal thank you John i enjoy [TS]

  visiting with you value our friendship [TS]

  but this is the thing when she goes in [TS]

  there [TS]

  first of all she's she could be a [TS]

  sleeper cell nobody's ever suspected [TS]

  that she would come in and what the what [TS]

  the pet grooming guys is she the shots [TS]

  right she's a nice girl she did not she [TS]

  did not seem like the one that was going [TS]

  to start kicking doors down exactly now [TS]

  if you want to fill the power vacuum you [TS]

  have to do things or cause things to [TS]

  happen that Mickey seem like not only [TS]

  the right person to stick into that [TS]

  Dyson but you've got to appear like the [TS]

  only person in the whole world who could [TS]

  take that thing and then you got to make [TS]

  those shows at the top and click it was [TS]

  their idea in the first place right and [TS]

  my bullets mind let's help i think the [TS]

  big the big challenge in a situation [TS]

  like that is the chose that are at your [TS]

  level that can't do that job but also [TS]

  don't want you to succeed at it and so [TS]

  they just become petulant about about [TS]

  taking orders from you or about taking [TS]

  even suggested especially if your lady [TS]

  and those are the ones that you know I I [TS]

  was advising her that she needs to she [TS]

  needs to start scheduling these meetings [TS]

  that are above her pay grade that are [TS]

  her meetings and then she needs to go [TS]

  around and make a coalition throughout [TS]

  the office like stopping every one of [TS]

  these guys is desks and say hey I'm [TS]

  looking forward to this meeting on [TS]

  monday and i really hope that that you [TS]

  that you'll be there because I I think [TS]

  you're your ideas in this are you know [TS]

  are invaluable and we really need to [TS]

  hear from you before we move forward [TS]

  because you're the [TS]

  kind of the gatekeeper for this segment [TS]

  or whatever and just do that thing just [TS]

  sit and like you're just strokin them [TS]

  with one hand and they and they and they [TS]

  feel the pressure of your knife point on [TS]

  under there ribs but they're not exactly [TS]

  sure whether it's a knife or a or just [TS]

  trying to give them a strong hug and [TS]

  they and they just think to themselves [TS]

  like you give them the out where they're [TS]

  like yeah I I gotta go to that meeting [TS]

  because I if I don't then they're not [TS]

  gonna that I'm whatever to you give them [TS]

  that but at the same time they feel a [TS]

  little bit they feel will endanger like [TS]

  I i I'd better go to that movie [TS]

  John I i if I could say I this is the [TS]

  most excited I've heard you about sound [TS]

  about anything in like the last 10 years [TS]

  this is this and this sounds like this [TS]

  could be i had one yeah this could be [TS]

  your duck it seems to me that you guys [TS]

  know this was your duck and it seems to [TS]

  me [TS]

  yeah I either side of your guy would be [TS]

  i think i would be mrs. this is a this [TS]

  is a silly ass thing on the surface of [TS]

  it but i think i would be a great [TS]

  corporate a boardroom person because I [TS]

  see the because ultimately ago a company [TS]

  operates according to a dynamic business [TS]

  dynamic but it's a human dynamic and I [TS]

  see through those things you know i have [TS]

  i have a x-ray vision about [TS]

  interpersonal stuff like that so and and [TS]

  also you're also you're an outsider all [TS]

  those guys are mired in that particular [TS]

  kind of malignant culture you come in [TS]

  from the outside and not only you're not [TS]

  going to taking that bullshit you don't [TS]

  even acknowledge the bullshit is there [TS]

  you just drive right past it well and I [TS]

  like to fertilize the garden watch it [TS]

  grow [TS]

  i also don't mind well wallowing in a [TS]

  bucket of blood and somewhere between [TS]

  fertilizing a garden and watching it [TS]

  grow and you know sitting in a bathtub [TS]

  knowing on the the shinbones of my [TS]

  enemies [TS]

  that's a bad is it that's basically a [TS]

  CEO that's what a CEO does who and I [TS]

  don't know what I keep waiting for [TS]

  there's a tech startup that is being run [TS]

  by a bunch of college monkeys who don't [TS]

  know how to talk to each other and have [TS]

  never looked another human in the eye [TS]

  except while they were searching their [TS]

  mother's face [TS]

  that she would put her boob in their [TS]

  mouth and these guys for whatever reason [TS]

  they get in contact with me or they get [TS]

  put in contact with me like hey we need [TS]

  somebody to go talk to other people for [TS]

  us because we're here busy making this [TS]

  3d digital printer that specializes in [TS]

  in reproducing Cynthia plaster casters [TS]

  Jimi Hendrix penis which let's be honest [TS]

  there are practitioners their core [TS]

  competency might be penis penis plaster [TS]

  but but needless look at it this way [TS]

  you're you're one of those college [TS]

  monkeys and you somehow fallen [TS]

  ass-backwards into a bunch of venture [TS]

  capital money [TS]

  well those guys this venture capital [TS]

  guys want to see their 10x right there [TS]

  is a gamble [TS]

  i'm thinking maybe you're contacted by [TS]

  the Monkees your contact by the zoo [TS]

  master [TS]

  oh I think the people you guys pick up a [TS]

  red phone it rings in your bathtub you [TS]

  pick it up and say John we need you say [TS]

  i know i've already known [TS]

  right right why you went there to find a [TS]

  private corporate to bring literally out [TS]

  by your house right next to the airport [TS]

  if you step inside they say would you [TS]

  would you like pina colada you say no [TS]

  thanks [TS]

  and then you are you land somewhere and [TS]

  you walk in and let's be honest you can [TS]

  be dressed really differently from them [TS]

  you're going to look very different from [TS]

  them and they're going to know the [TS]

  things are changing and maybe maybe [TS]

  maybe seems a little like your palate [TS]

  first [TS]

  yeah but you're empowered to be in power [TS]

  you don't need you don't need a contract [TS]

  you don't you don't need a mission [TS]

  statement you all because i have a [TS]

  seminar I was somewhat are tucked into [TS]

  my exceptionally wide leather belt [TS]

  that's what Mike my quarters are you [TS]

  wearing a robe I there maybe I'm not [TS]

  going to give away all my secrets [TS]

  depends on the skull but you know [TS]

  they're like this guy seems like a [TS]

  friend this guy seems like our dead but [TS]

  he has a sim attar he says of this shit [TS]

  it seems like a real straight shooter [TS]

  and the open his briefcase when there's [TS]

  a blunderbuss [TS]

  can you imagine the eyes around the [TS]

  table they have what we in the business [TS]

  call all hands meeting bring everybody [TS]

  into the big room and Craft services [TS]

  there they got fuckin artisanal coffee [TS]

  and malaysian a bad throw rocks it with [TS]

  a large leather belt with a sim attar [TS]

  and it's surprisingly costly briefcase [TS]

  that rattles when he walks he is missing [TS]

  a front tooth allowing introduce you to [TS]

  John John's gonna be running the company [TS]

  from here on out it's crowded and you [TS]

  know this is the thing I'm and you can [TS]

  actually get your forest gumps you got [TS]

  your bigs you got other Tom Hanks movies [TS]

  you got you know the being there thing [TS]

  where you've got this person who's [TS]

  wandering around and everybody's [TS]

  guessing all these things about what [TS]

  they're doing right that you're guessing [TS]

  that you know a big right you're [TS]

  guessing the tom hanks who is a child [TS]

  inside of a grown-up body is trying to [TS]

  undermine everybody there's guessing [TS]

  right you know what I mean they're [TS]

  guessing that that chance the gardener [TS]

  is is you know wants to be president [TS]

  wants to do is watch TV I think it's the [TS]

  same thing here [TS]

  exactly except in Reverse which is you [TS]

  come in you look a little bit like you [TS]

  had a rough patch and they don't know if [TS]

  that's a matar Israel but they're sure [TS]

  it's fucking to find out right and then [TS]

  it turns out might underestimate you [TS]

  John i actually have a head for business [TS]

  that no one could have foreseen the john [TS]

  III think your work is is presenting [TS]

  itself i mean you can still use still [TS]

  dick around and make things on Twitter [TS]

  and yeah I hope you still consider doing [TS]

  the show after you've got that office or [TS]

  maybe after year at the top of the child [TS]

  building you might be the head showed em [TS]

  well the thing is I'm gonna at first [TS]

  thing I'm gonna do the moving company [TS]

  out of the job building but the other [TS]

  lists are you ready and come after [TS]

  you've done this a couple times you know [TS]

  you get a couple under your belt you can [TS]

  come pick with those bits that you've [TS]

  written like maybe on a subway for her [TS]

  to come in and you've got John's not 11 [TS]

  and 14 how many point being I think 14 [TS]

  points the patient has 14 points i am a [TS]

  limit our agenda and you come and you [TS]

  spread it out you can with your finger [TS]

  flick off a little bit of green pepper [TS]

  and you show him how it's gonna go [TS]

  yeah listen first thing we're out of the [TS]

  child building we're spending too much [TS]

  money here and we're surrounded by joke [TS]

  you're pulling operations you tell us [TS]

  when we gotta move we gotta move some of [TS]

  these deck chairs around things are [TS]

  things are going to change now when you [TS]

  come in in that situation I think [TS]

  obviously if you're introduced here's [TS]

  the thing is one of the project manager [TS]

  and yes you know i'ma pussy you have [TS]

  some called a project mandate which is [TS]

  when somebody powerful signs off on a [TS]

  project and says you see this home a [TS]

  pussy over here [TS]

  this guy is allowed to speak for me oh [TS]

  yeah right this is the power i'm talking [TS]

  about its the sprocket mean it has it [TS]

  has its uses but it's not a piece of [TS]

  paper that makes it useful [TS]

  it's the it's the powerful person who [TS]

  people not just as in a position to fire [TS]

  you but could potentially ruin you when [TS]

  I person they've only seen pictures of [TS]

  in the in the lobby of the building [TS]

  comes in and says this is fucking John [TS]

  sit down like a gentleman and listen [TS]

  it's the threat of the summit are coming [TS]

  down on their exposed nothing as he saw [TS]

  you walk in with that and he was fine [TS]

  with it like you're not you're not [TS]

  you're not allowed to eat a burrito at [TS]

  your desk but a man literally in a [TS]

  bathroom with scimitars came in [TS]

  introduce you you didn't say your last [TS]

  name [TS]

  yeah all you need to know this is john [TS]

  shut the fuck up but when you come in [TS]

  are you going to be so a lot of people [TS]

  we have these cultural I you know I have [TS]

  you know as you know I have some friends [TS]

  that work at they make contacts and [TS]

  tekken makes right hand and sometimes as [TS]

  the company grows this happens but [TS]

  you're just having happened [TS]

  I want this is just as an outsider I see [TS]

  this catastrophic thing happen where [TS]

  they go the cultures all fucked up [TS]

  let's bring in some fucktard from [TS]

  somewhere else and they'll fix the [TS]

  culture you know what I mean which is [TS]

  you know I guess it's some sense of [TS]

  fighting fire with fire but it never [TS]

  works [TS]

  yeah you you need a you need somebody [TS]

  who is an agent of change isn't just [TS]

  going to come in there and hand out [TS]

  copies of starbucks book you want you [TS]

  want to and it literally happened [TS]

  yeah and also leave me I I know and I've [TS]

  read enough of those things where I just [TS]

  go uh-oh you're doing it wrong [TS]

  it allows the shitty ones in the middle [TS]

  of the middle ones at least pretend to [TS]

  listen for a week right [TS]

  but the really great ones i think on day [TS]

  one you know things like fucking George [TS]

  Patton walking in you he's not going to [TS]

  sit around and go I'm just here to [TS]

  listen right so go into you go in under [TS]

  the radar or do you walk in with the CEO [TS]

  that they've never met [TS]

  could you know what actually you can [TS]

  bring someone who looks like the CEO i [TS]

  think i'll be equally effective but i [TS]

  can when you can read an actor reenactor [TS]

  and I've got a scimitar just in the [TS]

  center of this back and saved by the [TS]

  bell [TS]

  shut up no you know that the the obvious [TS]

  thing about businesses that I mean all [TS]

  these people started a business and then [TS]

  got to got it to the point where they're [TS]

  in confidence now is the is the only [TS]

  thing in their confidence is the only [TS]

  blood that runs through these veins [TS]

  anymore [TS]

  you have no fucking idea how they make [TS]

  money anymore where they know what maybe [TS]

  that's the problem with these monkeys [TS]

  they probably never made money they've [TS]

  gotten checks from their mom and now [TS]

  they got checks from somebody on sand [TS]

  hill road and they've never had somebody [TS]

  come in to get that tea out of your [TS]

  mouth sit down and make a fucking 3d [TS]

  printer you know what i mean and so [TS]

  they're they're dicking around the [TS]

  riding on slides to throwing balls [TS]

  around three and Craft services but you [TS]

  know I've been dealing with those people [TS]

  i'm in and in another form for 25 years [TS]

  which is what is rock that is rock and [TS]

  roll [TS]

  yeah I've been dealing with people they [TS]

  can't look at another human being not [TS]

  challenging ready on day one my whole [TS]

  life and and dealing with people where [TS]

  it's just like okay there's seven people [TS]

  in the room with seven different agendas [TS]

  and noone and and everybody is acting [TS]

  like we all agree and the and the the [TS]

  second there's a power vacuum this is [TS]

  good it's going to turn into a lord of [TS]

  the flies and really there's only one [TS]

  person in the room that matters [TS]

  there's only one person in the room that [TS]

  whoever anybody should be paying any [TS]

  attention to and that's the guy with the [TS]

  idea the Senate are but well no not that [TS]

  it in those situations is not the guy [TS]

  with the scimitars there's usually a guy [TS]

  that has the song [TS]

  ok that's the guy that had the ideal [TS]

  like you said in the studio this is this [TS]

  is the guy this is the guy he says okay [TS]

  why don't you take another hour to get [TS]

  your solo where you want to be and then [TS]

  we're done with that [TS]

  yeah yeah yeah and that you know and and [TS]

  and and the fact that the drummer is the [TS]

  loudest guy in the room where the [TS]

  drummer is the guy with all the opinions [TS]

  you know somebody needs to take the [TS]

  drummer for a walk [TS]

  somebody needs somebody needed [TS]

  somebody's to say hey you know what I'm [TS]

  thinking about having my car detailed do [TS]

  you want to come out and take a look at [TS]

  her [TS]

  heard of so bag me to do you want to see [TS]

  ya let me show you my office [TS]

  let me show you my office is nice right [TS]

  and suddenly the problem resolved [TS]

  themselves [TS]

  hey look what i have in my briefcase oh [TS]

  it's a blunderbuss you know what a lot [TS]

  of people in modern forensics you know [TS]

  they're used to dealing with all of the [TS]

  all the various kinds of munitions that [TS]

  you see on the street today I'll [TS]

  splatter patterns you had a sawed-off [TS]

  blood plus it would know you know the [TS]

  thing is you can make a blunderbuss with [TS]

  the with the with a and stuff you buy it [TS]

  up exactly the kind of thing that people [TS]

  need to learn i did i did not know that [TS]

  I think about this you think about back [TS]

  in school [TS]

  your public school and you get a walk [TS]

  into class and there's a sub and like [TS]

  there's usually two kinds of substitute [TS]

  teachers just as soon as you said that I [TS]

  got excited it was like a hoe substitute [TS]

  today haha oh forget about it forget [TS]

  about you come in there and it's in my [TS]

  experience some of the time it will be [TS]

  someone extremely old who mostly reason [TS]

  to come back as he or really young like [TS]

  a young teacher at the site that is [TS]

  super dumb and and and wants to stick to [TS]

  the lesson plan she's got the lesson [TS]

  plan [TS]

  she's read some books that but then [TS]

  think about the time that you walked in [TS]

  and the substitute teacher was a [TS]

  forty-year-old that creep at a mustache [TS]

  it doesn't it's not good i was thinking [TS]

  I've been in so many situations where [TS]

  you know I I'm whatever the opposite of [TS]

  a handful is I was always happy to not [TS]

  cause trouble by and large least for the [TS]

  first you know 10 years but I you know [TS]

  the thing is the class gets a little out [TS]

  of control you know that lady that lady [TS]

  with the handbook and that you've been [TS]

  watching some some to Betamax tapes [TS]

  about how to become a teacher and she [TS]

  comes in there and it's immediately Lord [TS]

  of the Flies everything's totally out of [TS]

  control but you know what happens it [TS]

  gets so bad she picks up the black phone [TS]

  and in walks Frank careful [TS]

  knoxville principal the vice-principal [TS]

  the Dean of boys in walk somebody who is [TS]

  a known hard-ass maybe somebody was [TS]

  waiting on a tennis racket and swings in [TS]

  a cafeteria [TS]

  I'm saying oh it's only you I because [TS]

  the first thing that guy does when he [TS]

  walked in as he grabs me [TS]

  me and says come on we're going down to [TS]

  the office I'm gonna hurl [TS]

  yeah let's go for a walk let me show you [TS]

  what's in my briefcase well you know if [TS]

  you cut off the head you know I'm saying [TS]

  but I'm all I'm saying is like you know [TS]

  what if you didn't even need the [TS]

  principal in that instance if you walked [TS]

  in there was a man with a seminar [TS]

  standing there and he's already he's [TS]

  already [TS]

  I don't know are you mad or disappointed [TS]

  or are you just what when you're the [TS]

  substitute teacher i was going to say [TS]

  was that the principal comes in and [TS]

  suddenly everybody stands erect because [TS]

  they know that this is not someone to [TS]

  trifle with this is not a substitute [TS]

  principal yeah this is the guy who holds [TS]

  your hand yeah in every classroom when [TS]

  you walk in the door and I and I know [TS]

  this for many years were going to school [TS]

  you walk in the door of a classroom on [TS]

  the first day of school and you scan [TS]

  those those chairs and you think which [TS]

  chairs mine and there are a lot of kids [TS]

  that grab that first row chairs is that [TS]

  one of their because they're duggars and [TS]

  they want to set up from and then [TS]

  they're the they're the guys with the [TS]

  mullets and the baseball hats on [TS]

  backwards that are better grabbing that [TS]

  last row of chairs who because they're [TS]

  the guys that are in the back then [TS]

  they're all the people that just fill in [TS]

  just take a chair doesn't matter even [TS]

  though this is a decision you be sitting [TS]

  in this chair for the whole school year [TS]

  we'll just walk in and grab a chair [TS]

  whatever don't even think about it but I [TS]

  was always looking for the power desk [TS]

  and the power desk is toward the back [TS]

  but not all the way in the back and it [TS]

  is basically it's close to the windows [TS]

  with her and it is in a position you're [TS]

  in a position where you can control the [TS]

  temperature of the classroom [TS]

  it is basically the opposite pole from [TS]

  the teacher's desk need to find the desk [TS]

  in the classroom that is the opposite [TS]

  pole of the teacher's desk and it [TS]

  doesn't mean it's on the exact opposite [TS]

  side of the room because it could be on [TS]

  teachers side of the benefits going to [TS]

  very heavily by classroom and invited by [TS]

  setup it is the power pole that i would [TS]

  try to find because because my goal in [TS]

  every classroom was to be the opposite [TS]

  pole of the teacher [TS]

  to be the name that negative terminal to [TS]

  their positive to me like the same [TS]

  student and i would i would buy metadesk [TS]

  and I would sit there and the first few [TS]

  days of school I would it would just I [TS]

  would just be so quiet and calm because [TS]

  I wanted everyone in the class to just [TS]

  get into a groove you really start to [TS]

  develop relationships with the teacher I [TS]

  was just so patient because they knew my [TS]

  time would come and what it did then no [TS]

  one no one ever sees it you know and a [TS]

  lot of kids that they came up in school [TS]

  with me do whatever i SAT like there [TS]

  would be people that's that immediately [TS]

  chose the seats kind of in that vicinity [TS]

  because they wanted to be part of the [TS]

  fun and student kids that's that as far [TS]

  as they could because they didn't wanna [TS]

  didn't even want to get in reflected [TS]

  trouble they want to be in that shampoo [TS]

  splashdown [TS]

  damn you even one they didn't want any [TS]

  didn't want the Smashing aider or [TS]

  whatever the hell that Gallagher hammer [TS]

  is didn't want any water mount on them [TS]

  uh-huh and as a substitute teacher if i [TS]

  were to be a substitute teacher in high [TS]

  school I would walk into that class and [TS]

  I would scream at room as the students [TS]

  were sitting down and i was looking you [TS]

  know they were still kind of making [TS]

  noise and talk to each other and looking [TS]

  at me with sidelong glances I would be [TS]

  sitting up at the blackboard trying to [TS]

  identify that opposite pole because you [TS]

  can see it take shape in a classroom of [TS]

  kids as they as they come in and sit [TS]

  down you can see where that power pole [TS]

  is by who the kids are and how they're [TS]

  how they see themselves and how they you [TS]

  know what how how they look at you how [TS]

  they look at each other and i would i'd [TS]

  try and zoom in on where that power [TS]

  poles because that's the that's the only [TS]

  chair that matters in a classroom that [TS]

  you are that you are trying to teach for [TS]

  one day [TS]

  you know what I mean like if you are you [TS]

  in some ways looking for the younger and [TS]

  less experienced version of yourself [TS]

  well but but you can even in that poll [TS]

  you know what you know what that seat is [TS]

  you've been in that seat [TS]

  yeah but about but that the opposite the [TS]

  teachers opposite in every classroom [TS]

  kind of difference that it's not always [TS]

  the comedian or the the shit disturber [TS]

  it's you know they're there are there [TS]

  there can be a lot of variations on this [TS]

  there's that there could be the [TS]

  disgruntled girl that's never but it's [TS]

  nothing is ever right you know that can [TS]

  be your opposite it just depends on it [TS]

  just depends like it and you can feel it [TS]

  it's really it is if it's a matter of [TS]

  feeling the room and if you walk into a [TS]

  boardroom if you walk into any kind of [TS]

  room where there are 25 people and that [TS]

  where the 25 people know each other and [TS]

  you are new with you look for that pole [TS]

  you look for the the center of gravity [TS]

  that exists in the room and that's you [TS]

  know that and that's the part that's [TS]

  kind of the axis that you have to focus [TS]

  on you can't just start talking to the [TS]

  front row because if you're giving your [TS]

  you start giving your presentation like [TS]

  hey everybody how's it going love to see [TS]

  all your bright and smiling faces and [TS]

  you're talking to the front row you're [TS]

  gonna hear a sound from the back of the [TS]

  room that you don't like there's gonna [TS]

  be like up and then your then you've [TS]

  lost it [TS]

  the room is you know it's it's it's over [TS]

  so anyway that as a substitute teacher [TS]

  as a guy walking into a corporate [TS]

  boardroom who as I do every time I walk [TS]

  into a room where it's unfamiliar you [TS]

  know I'm scanning people as they walk in [TS]

  and watching you know who's the who is [TS]

  my who's my opposite pole here who's the [TS]

  one who thinks the room belongs to Ben [TS]

  and and even you're way ahead of me [TS]

  because I mean it seems to me that the [TS]

  skills that you've accrued from being [TS]

  such a problem make you uniquely capable [TS]

  at going into a situation like that and [TS]

  you know it just seems to me that given [TS]

  that you are empowered by that guy from [TS]

  safe from the city by the Bell you could [TS]

  potentially come in and cut off [TS]

  someone's left hand if you find the pole [TS]

  if you come into the corporate boardroom [TS]

  and you find one guy who looks like a [TS]

  little bit full of beans [TS]

  yeah maybe just a finger maybe take off [TS]

  a pinky me just like Al Capone with a [TS]

  baseball bat right just walk over and go [TS]

  hey great to see III [TS]

  I couldn't help but notice that you made [TS]

  a fart sound a second ago and whack ohh [TS]

  thats one finger you get nine left [TS]

  oh right oh well I mean that time you [TS]

  could always take more than that off it [TS]

  isn't done but there's not enough [TS]

  capriciousness and leadership there [TS]

  should be I mean the whole idea of [TS]

  decimation i think a lot of people don't [TS]

  understand what that word means and then [TS]

  you can correct me if I'm wrong as ever [TS]

  but my understanding of destination was [TS]

  the Romans would come in and say okay [TS]

  you know who tried who tried to put [TS]

  feces and the soldiers well and i'm [TS]

  going to say not me [TS]

  and so they did kill one out of every 10 [TS]

  people and say let me ask you that [TS]

  question again that's my understanding [TS]

  of decimation was we make an example out [TS]

  of one of you and then one-tenth of you [TS]

  and then we just keep winning that down [TS]

  until somebody's willing to tell us what [TS]

  we want to know [TS]

  yeah there's always you can always take [TS]

  one tenth away and you get ever closer [TS]

  2012 not that much always get there [TS]

  oh no although if you're talking about [TS]

  an army of 100,000 man it says there's a [TS]

  lot of blood in the river [TS]

  yeah what's nobody said it wasn't any [TS]

  time consuming and then run wasn't app [TS]

  anyway you know everybody is so scared [TS]

  about getting sued now people are scared [TS]

  about getting sued so higher higher and [TS]

  his lawyer that's right hire an actor [TS]

  let them to him [TS]

  people are afraid of getting sued who [TS]

  are never in their lives ever ever ever [TS]

  going to get sued [TS]

  you know I I was backing into a parking [TS]

  spot [TS]

  not very long ago in front of us of a [TS]

  hair salon hair and nail salon and it [TS]

  was a tight parking spot and as I was [TS]

  backing into the parking spot the UH I i [TS]

  did not make it all the way in and this [TS]

  is embarrassing for me to say it wasn't [TS]

  it was an awkward spot offered Lee [TS]

  situated it was not it was not a parking [TS]

  lot parking concept problem but I had to [TS]

  I had to pull out in and start again and [TS]

  in the course of doing this the people [TS]

  in the salon but the customers and the [TS]

  salon people the worker people the sala [TS]

  nieces [TS]

  they took an interest in this and they [TS]

  got up out of their chairs and all came [TS]

  out onto the sidewalk because the car in [TS]

  the back belong to one of the people at [TS]

  the salon and as I'm backing into this [TS]

  spot a second time one of the one of the [TS]

  people says if you hit my car I'm gonna [TS]

  sue you and this is I mean I'm talking [TS]

  about like a bit if I had touched it [TS]

  would've been like a little bump [TS]

  I mean a little bump and it was a it was [TS]

  a fascinating study in for me in the way [TS]

  that people think the world works [TS]

  you know and after I got out of the car [TS]

  and they worse kind of still standing on [TS]

  the sidewalk watching now my car be [TS]

  parked i said i would like you to call [TS]

  the police now so that we can begin this [TS]

  lawsuit process and of course you know [TS]

  there was a lot of shit talking back and [TS]

  forth between me and these 11 girls [TS]

  because that's out there that's how do [TS]

  something yeah but this idea that that a [TS]

  lot that the threat of a lawsuit has [TS]

  filtered down in our culture to the [TS]

  point that this person is this car that [TS]

  i was about to bump into was in 1994 [TS]

  Ford black s-10 pickup or whatever it [TS]

  was not a thing [TS]

  it was nothing like I felt like opening [TS]

  my wall and throwing the money for that [TS]

  truck was worth at her and demanding the [TS]

  key right [TS]

  um but this idea that you know it and [TS]

  she did it like straight it was straight [TS]

  face it like that out that the threat of [TS]

  a lawsuit has become is the new I'm [TS]

  gonna call the police [TS]

  yeah I'm gonna call my mom and you and [TS]

  you you scale that up to a world where [TS]

  lawsuits actually do happen in in in [TS]

  companies where people actually do sue [TS]

  for discrimination or they do sue [TS]

  for wrongful termination or they do sue [TS]

  for sexual harassment and you apply that [TS]

  that the fact that it that the the [TS]

  thread is more real [TS]

  but but that we all carry around in the [TS]

  back of our minds the possibility that a [TS]

  lawsuit is a thing that could be that we [TS]

  could be hit with at any moment and it [TS]

  it creates this inhibiting fear I think [TS]

  nationwide and maybe even now around the [TS]

  world and inhibiting fear of just doing [TS]

  what you need and what needs to get done [TS]

  at end and being who you are and the [TS]

  reality about a lawsuit is that fuck you [TS]

  really you're gonna you know like the [TS]

  the number of lawsuits that it is it is [TS]

  the it is a rare occasion when you can [TS]

  get when you can get an actual lawsuit [TS]

  off the ground and roll one you know [TS]

  what I mean it like that spending like [TS]

  $50,000 you gotta have the money you [TS]

  gotta have a few you gotta have us that [TS]

  you've got to have a case that makes [TS]

  sense to everybody you have to have a [TS]

  real burr in your saddle you know and [TS]

  and yet I talk to people all the time [TS]

  whether like well yeah I'd love to do [TS]

  that but you know we'd probably get sued [TS]

  it's like you know what you kind of take [TS]

  the risk sometime sometimes that [TS]

  yeah it is conceivable that you like [TS]

  that you might get sued but but that is [TS]

  a risk you need to take sometimes you [TS]

  need to take the risk that you're gonna [TS]

  get some remaining a little bit of the [TS]

  altercation you had with with the fellow [TS]

  at the bar who was not aware that punch [TS]

  in the nose was something that really [TS]

  could happen exactly right the kind of [TS]

  person who threatens to say what did he [TS]

  say to you this is there are [TS]

  consequences [TS]

  yeah right i mean that that it strikes [TS]

  me that I you know I have friends who [TS]

  are lawyers and friends who are not [TS]

  acquaintances it seems to me that by and [TS]

  large the people who I never here [TS]

  threatening to sue someone is a lawyer [TS]

  because they understand what it means it [TS]

  up and it gets on the one hand it's sort [TS]

  of like threatening to go to medical [TS]

  school like if you get my [TS]

  car I'm gonna go to medical school like [TS]

  i'm gonna go spend a lot of time and [TS]

  money for something that might work out [TS]

  okay and i'm going to stop everything [TS]

  but if you've ever been sued or have [TS]

  actually sue somebody it seems like [TS]

  about the most draining process in the [TS]

  world [TS]

  yeah so that's the thing as with people [TS]

  who threaten make the violence as with [TS]

  people who accuse other people being [TS]

  hypocrites and as with people who are [TS]

  constantly doing lawsuits I think [TS]

  they're mainly scared of the thing that [TS]

  they're threatening you with and assume [TS]

  that that will work on you [TS]

  yeah and so often does I mean you know [TS]

  how many business situations do you know [TS]

  where where everybody in the company [TS]

  knows like this one person is the [TS]

  problem [TS]

  okay there's one person in this [TS]

  situation is just a problem this person [TS]

  needs to go and yet that should be like [TS]

  point number three it's no John that is [TS]

  so he just so many people you going to [TS]

  talk to these places there is one person [TS]

  that is just killing the place [TS]

  yeah this guy needs to go but we can't [TS]

  get rid of him why can't you get rid of [TS]

  him [TS]

  well because he had he might suit he's [TS]

  got diabetes [TS]

  yeah a mess with us yeah it's [TS]

  discrimination discrimination or he just [TS]

  might sue you know like you or or we [TS]

  just don't have it all he doesn't even [TS]

  need a reason just the whole idea that [TS]

  we might this guy who obviously is a nut [TS]

  job and that's why we need to get rid of [TS]

  them [TS]

  this is very nutjob eNOS that makes us [TS]

  think that he's just the kind of nutjob [TS]

  might see us right and when we have in [TS]

  our corporate a it a boilerplate all the [TS]

  reasons that you need to to a mass in [TS]

  order to properly fire somebody and so [TS]

  we have to even though that you know [TS]

  this is our this is our internal policy [TS]

  like we have to follow it to the letter [TS]

  and we have to spend him and my mom [TS]

  talks about this 30 years ago [TS]

  there's like what there's one guy in the [TS]

  in the place that needs to go but he but [TS]

  but we ended up paying him for another [TS]

  year until we could come around to his [TS]

  performance review again where we had [TS]

  documented his you know because he would [TS]

  always improve right before it's like [TS]

  trying to catch a dog shitting on the [TS]

  run it's like you you have to like you [TS]

  see you have to spend all of your time [TS]

  like walking on eggshells and saying I [TS]

  hope we finally catch this guy doing the [TS]

  thing that we know we can the music [TS]

  double yeah right and in some cases you [TS]

  know you just have to fire the guy and [TS]

  he and you know he's not gonna sue or if [TS]

  he does he's gonna lose and what you're [TS]

  so you're saying it's not like we are [TS]

  saying is like yes suing will happen and [TS]

  if you're at the show corporation they [TS]

  probably have the resources to deal with [TS]

  that kind of thing you certainly don't [TS]

  want to invite things like nuisance [TS]

  lawsuits obviously I but at the same [TS]

  time you're saying that that leads to a [TS]

  certain kind of what cultural [TS]

  apprehensive pneus that makes us less [TS]

  effective we become pussy certainly we [TS]

  know what happens in a company and earn [TS]

  any organization as you stop believing [TS]

  in yourself you stop believing that you [TS]

  doing the Lord's work because i am [TS]

  because you see every day how you're [TS]

  being hamstrung by this you know by [TS]

  someone who is intentionally disruptive [TS]

  and you need to you need to get think [TS]

  that you need to get the cancer out and [TS]

  as my dad used to say that's what [TS]

  lawyers before I mean that's why we're [TS]

  that's why they get the can throw get [TS]

  the cancer out [TS]

  oh I was I had lunch with Ken Jennings [TS]

  the Jeopardy you get dressed up like [TS]

  doctors [TS]

  yeah we have a good time we go around [TS]

  and knock on people's doors just as [TS]

  doctors they aren't you yeah I already [TS]

  give them exams actually die from that [TS]

  bored me but in the as we were doing we [TS]

  were having a good time and I realized [TS]

  we had this brilliant idea which was a [TS]

  company that hires celebrities to [TS]

  deliver subpoenas haha right you get [TS]

  celebrities on the level of ken jennings [TS]

  where a lot of people have seen Ken [TS]

  Jennings they know who he is Ken [TS]

  Jennings comes to your office he goes [TS]

  hey is you know is Mark Miller here and [TS]

  the Secretary's like aren't you can [TS]

  Jennings and he's like that's right here [TS]

  to see Mark Miller and she's like let me [TS]

  get him [TS]

  she's like bart miller in Genesis here [TS]

  the guy comes running out he's like oh [TS]

  my god can gentleman ken jennings hands [TS]

  in the little blue folder flat even [TS]

  served ah oh yeah no one's ever gonna [TS]

  see that coming [TS]

  celebrity process service [TS]

  uh-huh right let me become part of the [TS]

  problem that's what that's not a bad [TS]

  idea i mean that seems like that could [TS]

  be a short afternoon of work and you [TS]

  know I mean you just go up you do a [TS]

  thing and you're done you can sign some [TS]

  autographs you know why you're there and [TS]

  so let's have a lot of downtime who and [TS]

  that mean actually projects and i think [TS]

  i think what happens with a lot of [TS]

  celebrities as the bait that they start [TS]

  to feel they start to feel like what's [TS]

  the what's their place in the world [TS]

  what's the point [TS]

  like are they doing good are they part [TS]

  of the are they part of the world [TS]

  anymore they just living in there so you [TS]

  know they're solid gold bathtub i'm [TS]

  projecting boop about what it must be [TS]

  like to be a celebrity but you know if [TS]

  they were out there in the world meeting [TS]

  people serving subpoenas I think it [TS]

  would get given frame their life in a [TS]

  good way [TS]

  anyway that's the kind of thing that you [TS]

  could probably put together you know you [TS]

  know a lot of people who are down on [TS]

  their luck then people would recognize [TS]

  that's right a lot of recognizable [TS]

  people who are between three projects we [TS]

  weren't you in that one band i love i [TS]

  love writing an interactive president of [TS]

  the slap [TS]

  you're just going to defend but he [TS]

  didn't used to host the late-night talk [TS]

  show that's left are you the guy from [TS]

  that commercial you've been served [TS]

  I really think that somewhere out there [TS]

  there is a corporate job because you you [TS]

  know my uncle my uncle a lumberjack know [TS]

  this is michael jackson's uncle Cal [TS]

  uncle Cal was a he started working he [TS]

  was a [TS]

  was a [TS]

  player and he started he grew up here in [TS]

  Washington his father was a dive at ten [TS]

  that would drive around and like by [TS]

  strawberry fields and and put together [TS]

  this Empire kind of you know [TS]

  agricultural Empire and my uncle Cal [TS]

  started working in the lumber business [TS]

  in the in the fifties and sixties when [TS]

  when in the northwest cutting down trees [TS]

  was still seen as environmental work you [TS]

  know when you're metal work of a kind my [TS]

  dear my environment the the process of [TS]

  turning my dad into an environmentalist [TS]

  was and this is a thing that people are [TS]

  generation at have a hard time grasping [TS]

  was that my dad's generation believed [TS]

  that that to be an environmentalist [TS]

  meant that you went out in the forest [TS]

  breathing deep of the mountain air and [TS]

  chopped the fuck down some trees because [TS]

  that was all that was the hardy kind of [TS]

  outdoorsy man that that made America [TS]

  strong of the idea of conserving trees [TS]

  or not chopping down a tree had never [TS]

  occurred to them like chopping down a [TS]

  tree was the thing that that a that a [TS]

  true woodsman did and uncle Cal started [TS]

  in the lumber business in Washington [TS]

  State and he ended up being vice [TS]

  president of warehouser at a time when [TS]

  the president of where hauser was George [TS]

  where Hauser and this is that this is [TS]

  during the era when companies that did [TS]

  not have a CEO they had a president they [TS]

  had one vice president and then they [TS]

  then everyone else that seems like [TS]

  halcyon days now [TS]

  comparison with a sense you gotta [TS]

  president you got advice but one vice [TS]

  president president one vice president [TS]

  and then get the Wreckers instructions [TS]

  managers now you look at a company it's [TS]

  like CEO CEO CFO COO cpo with chief [TS]

  petty officer and then executive vice [TS]

  president executive vice president and [TS]

  then 17 vice-president get executives [TS]

  you got seniors you got advice you got [TS]

  junior it's like who are these people [TS]

  that are the your you are a senior vice [TS]

  president [TS]

  you have five people working for a [TS]

  second wait up archive humanity like one [TS]

  of those people telling so annoying but [TS]

  anyway so how r has a warehouse uncle [TS]

  Cal vice-president warehouser and then [TS]

  he became president of macmillan bloedel [TS]

  Canada's largest timber company who and [TS]

  he was president of macmillan bledel for [TS]

  many many years and then he entered this [TS]

  world which is the world that I aspire [TS]

  to be a member of an ultimately king of [TS]

  which is this world of people who used [TS]

  to be generals of the army people who [TS]

  are retired senators the President of [TS]

  Princeton University former head of the [TS]

  CIA professor emeritus professor [TS]

  emeritus my uncle Cal became a guy who [TS]

  was on the board of directors and first [TS]

  he was on the board of directors of see [TS]

  first bank and then he was on the board [TS]

  of directors of bank of america and then [TS]

  he was on the board of directors of and [TS]

  then it just it went it became like a [TS]

  spore situation where all of a sudden [TS]

  what my uncle Cal did was be on the [TS]

  board of directors of a couple of [TS]

  companies and he would you be so you [TS]

  would be so good at that of 20 companies [TS]

  and and every one of them you know I [TS]

  don't know how much a that a person on [TS]

  board of directors gets paid now but [TS]

  back in the eighties and nineties he was [TS]

  getting paid a lot of money a lot more [TS]

  than the people actually worked there [TS]

  yeah that's right and he would describe [TS]

  it he told us and the thing is he was a [TS]

  Republican and up and a person who [TS]

  believed in business and he would tell [TS]

  these stories and he would not realize [TS]

  how ironic they were because he because [TS]

  it he was living in a world where this [TS]

  seemed perfectly legitimate but he would [TS]

  get he would wake up in the morning he [TS]

  would drive down to the airport he would [TS]

  get on a Learjet where he was the only [TS]

  passenger and he would fly to California [TS]

  where they would and then our car would [TS]

  pick him up the airport and take them to [TS]

  this board meeting where they would [TS]

  spend an hour and a half [TS]

  debating whether or not to raise the [TS]

  minimum wage at their company from 425 [TS]

  an hour to [TS]

  440 an hour and they would decide that [TS]

  they couldn't afford it and then if they [TS]

  raise the minimum wage from for 25 to 40 [TS]

  would jeopardize the company's bottom [TS]

  line and so they would vote it down and [TS]

  then an hour later he would be driven [TS]

  back to the airport to Learjet where he [TS]

  was the only passenger and flown home so [TS]

  that he could have dinner at at home and [TS]

  the irony never occurred to him and when [TS]

  and when i pointed out that that not [TS]

  just a bit obvious because I'm just [TS]

  realized that that perhaps for example [TS]

  if he taken a train or a personal car [TS]

  instead of a one-man Learjet they might [TS]

  be able to bump it up ten or fifteen [TS]

  cents [TS]

  well that the that basically the cost of [TS]

  that a wage increase was born completely [TS]

  who abide by the decision tonight but it [TS]

  was contained in B in the aviation [TS]

  gasoline costs of all the Learjets of [TS]

  the board members that came to that [TS]

  meeting like it they think it's like a [TS]

  preston sturges movie like I said that [TS]

  it's amazing that that would not occur [TS]

  to him they squandered that that pay [TS]

  raise and a thousand more like it in the [TS]

  in the just in the in the nuts and bolts [TS]

  process of doing business that way [TS]

  American business and the fact is that [TS]

  that is a board meeting that they could [TS]

  have had over speakerphone that is the [TS]

  board meeting but they could have had [TS]

  via registered letter like it was there [TS]

  is no reason that those people had to be [TS]

  in the room together to to debate and [TS]

  make that decision because basically [TS]

  they're all made up their minds before [TS]

  they arrive that seems like a foregone [TS]

  conclusion and you know and to have the [TS]

  Learjet standing by to take somebody to [TS]

  fly I mean that their jet had probably [TS]

  either was standing by or had fly up to [TS]

  get him one and add gas is not a cheap [TS]

  thing anyway when I pointed it out to [TS]

  him his reaction was the same as when I [TS]

  as every time basically pointed anything [TS]

  out to him which was just like well [TS]

  that's how business is done and you [TS]

  don't [TS]

  like you don't eat you don't understand [TS]

  that it is necessary [TS]

  um and and it and all that such a [TS]

  typical reaction basically it all it all [TS]

  works out in the wash because you know [TS]

  because that because that gasoline and [TS]

  that fight was tax deductible so [TS]

  ultimately we don't pay for it because [TS]

  it's free because we because we deducted [TS]

  from our taxes and that's free because [TS]

  of course taxes are terrible and you [TS]

  know and as a as a twenty-three-year-old [TS]

  idealist sitting in his admittedly [TS]

  palatial living room which I enjoyed [TS]

  being in very much and enjoyed the fact [TS]

  that there's usually someone in a white [TS]

  shirt handing me some food on a tray i [TS]

  had I I was you know I was loath to look [TS]

  to wash it you're inside the machine but [TS]

  but but it you know it it resonated in [TS]

  my head and have my whole life that the [TS]

  that that is where the the pay raise [TS]

  goes it goes right up the smoke stack of [TS]

  the cost of doing business know-how my [TS]

  god Kiki imagine how many companies [TS]

  could benefit from really really really [TS]

  hearing that right now you know i'm not [TS]

  you know that may be part of the problem [TS]

  also is so you're telling me he's on [TS]

  like the not the board of advisors but [TS]

  like the the board of directors board of [TS]

  directors for directors and so he's not [TS]

  the only one flew in for that meeting [TS]

  other between 15 and that's that's a lot [TS]

  of money lending jobs to quote Mel [TS]

  Brooks here's the thing what if let's [TS]

  say for the sake of argument [TS]

  what if instead there's a company in the [TS]

  Pacific Northwest that is tired of [TS]

  spending all of that money to bring 15 [TS]

  people in for a foregone conclusion [TS]

  what if instead you can hire one man who [TS]

  literally literally walk to the office [TS]

  in a bathrobe and kind of that call [TS]

  I'm gonna I'm gonna cut you know what we [TS]

  can videoconference yeah I'm gonna walk [TS]

  in Mahama play the guitar down and open [TS]

  the briefcase [TS]

  yes I'm gonna say here's the call CI [TS]

  this is the thing though and this is why [TS]

  i say you might to start out you might [TS]

  want to restrict yourself to think that [TS]

  you could walk to because or you know at [TS]

  least take a cookie too because yes [TS]

  first of all you're immediately a profit [TS]

  Center rather than a cost Center [TS]

  I met that's exactly the kind of you [TS]

  know logic you're going to have to bring [TS]

  these people you know maybe in a way [TS]

  that is not gonna be comfortable at [TS]

  first I think doing it over a conference [TS]

  call my man can make you look a little [TS]

  weird you know it but if you want if [TS]

  you're in the room if you're in the room [TS]

  with them with the scimitars I think [TS]

  people are going to set up their seat a [TS]

  little bit what if I what if it was a 3d [TS]

  projection of me though haha that you [TS]

  had some college monkeys built for you [TS]

  I'm saying I'm saying what if I'm an [TS]

  actor or ken jennings blacks walks in to [TS]

  a board room sets down as small like the [TS]

  size of a box of crackers a smart device [TS]

  everybody looks up and he said yeah he [TS]

  sets down a little black box outside [TS]

  with box of crackers and he says lights [TS]

  please [TS]

  amendment Wow and now show why appear in [TS]

  a row [TS]

  this is slightly larger than life sucks [TS]

  quotes that you're outside [TS]

  yeah you're looking at a little like a [TS]

  12 1.2 scale and and and and i want the [TS]

  room and i started i started looking [TS]

  everybody that it's not something that [TS]

  projecting like Princess Leia you're [TS]

  moving around the room around the room [TS]

  and I'm looking everybody in the eyes [TS]

  but they can't quite look into my eyes [TS]

  because your eyes aren't that because my [TS]

  eyes are black is black workers so they [TS]

  get that the 3d stuff can also enhance [TS]

  so not only do you get to have the [TS]

  convenience of working from your home or [TS]

  new office but but they're enhancements [TS]

  to the 3d yeah I look like Wes Borland [TS]

  from i have but i'm totally black eye [TS]

  balls and amplifies the message and [TS]

  amplifies my voice so that is coming out [TS]

  of their speakers in the bottom of every [TS]

  1c drops and have a register [TS]

  well listen raise the minimum wage [TS]

  twenty cents she bent over Kenny just [TS]

  like a cracker box out there [TS]

  what's it but the back of his briefcase [TS]

  thank you gentlemen you've been served [TS]

  I think you're going to help a lot [TS]

  here's the thing okay so this might be [TS]

  this might bring you right back to [TS]

  fixing this whole whole what is your [TS]

  work where is your office situation [TS]

  because there may be a problem inside of [TS]

  the problem I've been telling you for a [TS]

  long time I I think you should keep [TS]

  doing music stuff you know if you enjoy [TS]

  it and it makes you some money that's [TS]

  terrific but I'd like to think these [TS]

  conversations can hopefully help you [TS]

  realize what you're capable of and what [TS]

  I'm saying here is not only would you [TS]

  you might want to get an office in or [TS]

  transitional office in a transitional [TS]

  bathroom to get you moving in the right [TS]

  direction but here's the thing [TS]

  yes maybe just to get some practice and [TS]

  get a few hearts under your belt you [TS]

  might want to help your friend who [TS]

  sounds like let's be honest she could [TS]

  you together could be a super team [TS]

  inside of that company right especially [TS]

  if you're in there maybe you're hiding [TS]

  under her desk feeding her lines but [TS]

  first [TS]

  that's good you're going to learn more [TS]

  about the corporate culture because now [TS]

  you have new black eyes to bring into [TS]

  there and see that happening so maybe [TS]

  the real endgame here is not for you to [TS]

  go in and help a company but to start a [TS]

  company that whether they like it or not [TS]

  helps other companies [TS]

  oh so I'm just saying now Ken Jennings [TS]

  sounds like he's got time to kill so he [TS]

  made a lot of day off that jeopardy is [TS]

  that right well but it's one of those [TS]

  things where you can you make a lot of [TS]

  dough at something he didn't make like a [TS]

  quick your game show job kinda down i [TS]

  know he's here but he made was now he [TS]

  made the dough that enables him now to [TS]

  write books for a living [TS]

  ok book so kind of cereal crossword [TS]

  puzzle books are like you will so he [TS]

  wrote a book about a about crazy people [TS]

  who are who are really into questions i [TS]

  like the twist so we're just going to [TS]

  talk about being the guy who was on [TS]

  Jeopardy took any turned it was like [TS]

  look at look at it was like that book [TS]

  about scrabble people except about quiz [TS]

  show people and now his most recent book [TS]

  is about maps and geography cheese it as [TS]

  you may recall one of my that is one of [TS]

  my secret that is that is that is a [TS]

  maybe even a wall inside your wheelhouse [TS]

  it really is it's like a shelf is it's [TS]

  like us it's like the opposite of a safe [TS]

  word [TS]

  he started talking about writing this [TS]

  book about maps and and I was like [TS]

  Danger Danger Danger [TS]

  my might might start talking for hours [TS]

  about maps [TS]

  he's probably got enough to look at that [TS]

  I've just seen photos of him i remember [TS]

  seeing him on television but I saw that [TS]

  photo you put up whatever a day or two [TS]

  ago and he looks first of all you do [TS]

  kind of recognized him from something [TS]

  right [TS]

  he's got a name that does let's be [TS]

  honest a little bit forgettable but he [TS]

  looks really really friendly [TS]

  he was an enormously yeah he's easily is [TS]

  what you would call a gentleman he's [TS]

  like a classic could it be like your [TS]

  conciliatory could he be your Tom Hagen [TS]

  well this is the thing I owed can and I [TS]

  are just getting to know each other who [TS]

  and I said you want to slow that map [TS]

  thing might not just a little bit i see [TS]

  i see in him the the possibility he's [TS]

  very friendly and to the point of not [TS]

  friendly strong word is very nice to a [TS]

  point about a little bit of a little bit [TS]

  of Mayberry side but I said you could [TS]

  you could really use that [TS]

  yeah right and I son you personally [TS]

  personally [TS]

  hi how do i do p 0 say I'm gonna get my [TS]

  daily I look over here get my daily [TS]

  haircut from the stuttering man I well [TS]

  you know long as I was having my [TS]

  fingernails waxed he surrounded himself [TS]

  with friendly but incompetent people he [TS]

  turned out great [TS]

  he did well was you know he had the [TS]

  advantage of William the south which I [TS]

  do not have that's true but can I see in [TS]

  him that but this is the thing I'm [TS]

  always looking at people and seeing the [TS]

  darkness in them because that's what is [TS]

  primarily what I'm looking for and I see [TS]

  in can the potential that he could be a [TS]

  consigliere but that's the pigment Tom [TS]

  Hayden was not a little more time [TS]

  consigliere [TS]

  yeah and did you know I don't know if [TS]

  candidates or not I don't know if he is [TS]

  prepared I don't know if he wants that [TS]

  much blood on his smock but there's the [TS]

  thing is there's no Jennings and team [TS]

  the whole point of this is you're going [TS]

  to be surrounded by people who are going [TS]

  to either amplify or or or squelch or [TS]

  ameliorate the various parts of your [TS]

  black eye personality true right you're [TS]

  going to need the I think I mean [TS]

  certainly let's look at it this way you [TS]

  know if the people who live there [TS]

  operations the people who are in [TS]

  accounts receivable and payable the [TS]

  people who are throwing a fucking ball [TS]

  they're making 3d machines like they [TS]

  don't all have the same job they [TS]

  certainly don't all have the same [TS]

  personality right that the person who [TS]

  works in the way they call it the other [TS]

  cases the KP the PX the person who works [TS]

  at the epic kb are you and where do you [TS]

  work at the case i want to hit the KP [TS]

  it's not it's not something i'm happy [TS]

  about you that's different from zero and [TS]

  and the thing is he can is going to make [TS]

  candidate Ken isn't an extra I think it [TS]

  would be an extraordinary general he [TS]

  would but you know but he may want to [TS]

  well tell you what he and i'll talk [TS]

  about this okay [TS]

  as the as the as the work progresses at [TS]

  first I might just at just ask him as a [TS]

  favor to serve some people with some [TS]

  papers and also maybe show up at a [TS]

  couple of board meeting is it a little [TS]

  bit of dual spec work that you don't [TS]

  enjoy it especially I don't see those [TS]

  see how he likes it see how about went [TS]

  over and it's like without you get [TS]

  married you don't get married just [TS]

  checking out that was fun for me it was [TS]

  this one for you [TS]

  alright well let's let's do it again and [TS]

  then you know like 15 years from now Ken [TS]

  Jennings walks into a boardroom [TS]

  everybody hits the dirt [TS]

  everybody's everybody's crawling under [TS]

  the table and not me not me it's got the [TS]

  body not be and then and Ken doesn't [TS]

  even have to have the box anymore he [TS]

  just wants it then the traditional box [TS]

  then pretty soon he got robbed the lady [TS]

  walking in to a boardroom put the box on [TS]

  the table and Ken Jennings in 3d shapes [TS]

  everything [TS]

  carrying a briefcase [TS]