Roderick on the Line

Ep. 108: "Jim Here"


  this episode of rock on the line is [TS]

  sponsored by Squarespace the all-in-one [TS]

  platform that makes it fast and easy to [TS]

  create your own professional website [TS]

  portfolio or online store for a free [TS]

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  starts with your website [TS]

  [Music] [TS]

  hello hi John hi I'm Merlin how's it [TS]

  going up [TS]

  well I I'm trying something new semester [TS]

  with one hand what are you doing at some [TS]

  point Jim here just I said to John on [TS]

  the robot are are you ready to record [TS]

  and he said Jim here I had some so i was [TS]

  i was cleaning out an old guitar case [TS]

  yesterday and i found my old rat pedal [TS]

  which had been missing and then I found [TS]

  this bag of starbucks basically like [TS]

  little nescafe tubes [TS]

  did you ever experience nescafe yeah you [TS]

  know I'm just trying to put it all [TS]

  together is this is sort of like the [TS]

  things you can like European sugar [TS]

  holders is that kind of shaped like a [TS]

  tube like that [TS]

  yeah it's a little paper tube it in [TS]

  Europe you'll often be in situations [TS]

  where the only coffee that you have [TS]

  available is nescafe which is just [TS]

  instant like poor poor the little [TS]

  grounds for some grounds and pour some [TS]

  hot water over and your coffee appears [TS]

  and when i first discovered them I [TS]

  thought they were revelation i didn't [TS]

  realize of course that it's just sank or [TS]

  or you know it's just flavor crystals or [TS]

  whatever America has had instant coffee [TS]

  for years decided but growing up I [TS]

  didn't have coffee until I moved to [TS]

  Seattle and so I never experienced [TS]

  coffee that comes in cans mean that's [TS]

  the coffee that the adults drink when I [TS]

  was growing up but I never had it it was [TS]

  only it was only espresso like that was [TS]

  my introduction so when I first we say [TS]

  it again you mean the same way that we [TS]

  would have liked the internet Nestle's [TS]

  Quik like you take a spoon you put into [TS]

  the canister and done some hot water on [TS]

  top of it [TS]

  yeah right like I mean I don't even know [TS]

  what soldiers is I don't know is is the [TS]

  would you put folders into a modern [TS]

  coffee maker [TS]

  you would wouldn't you it's just my [TS]

  ground coffee I'm you know I don't know [TS]

  what it's been a really [TS]

  long time and for some reason like my [TS]

  got 25 cars on this one is the next can [TS]

  I remember the nescafe commercials and I [TS]

  remember the day we show the commercials [TS]

  they had a cool like little little mugs [TS]

  look at globe with a handle on it i just [TS]

  like to say to listeners I would kill [TS]

  for one of those today and the other one [TS]

  was when I had one of my first freelance [TS]

  jobs and it was just discovering coffee [TS]

  i would work late at night at this real [TS]

  estate office and I would put it [TS]

  basically would make hot chocolate and [TS]

  then dumped coffee instant coffee into [TS]

  it i right right right and I didn't know [TS]

  any better [TS]

  well so i'm also my chakra tea that you [TS]

  know it was a covered up the nastiness [TS]

  of the caffeine in coffee tastes Right [TS]

  giant buzz the first couple of times [TS]

  that I did european rock touring where I [TS]

  was where I would show up at a venue and [TS]

  there would be like one there be a box [TS]

  that had the equivalent of 50 cups of [TS]

  coffee in it but it was all in little [TS]

  little tubes little paper tubes [TS]

  wow I was like this is genius and i [TS]

  would grab the whole box and stuff it in [TS]

  my bag i'll be like I have coffee now [TS]

  forever [TS]

  no one can ever tell me there's no [TS]

  coffee with the very least you never [TS]

  have to worry that there won't be coffee [TS]

  right i'm in his coffee now I'm going to [TS]

  carry one of these in my wallet at all [TS]

  times it's like that it's like 2-4 [TS]

  coffee you know it's a good kind of [TS]

  coffee caffeine condom and and so anyway [TS]

  so I'm emptying out this guitar case and [TS]

  I find this bag of starbucks branded [TS]

  paper tube nescafe grounds and only [TS]

  guided by voices song by general haha [TS]

  and I'm like I don't remember I don't [TS]

  remember seeing these before I don't [TS]

  remember secret secret of these in my [TS]

  guitar bag but i absolutely this is at [TS]

  finding these is absolutely consistent [TS]

  with the the kind of hoarder coffee [TS]

  order mentality have exhibited before [TS]

  which is in any situation where I'm in a [TS]

  backstage environment or a [TS]

  like a a gift bag situation where a lot [TS]

  of gift bags now that you get it events [TS]

  will have a pound of coffee in them [TS]

  really in the northwest at least like if [TS]

  you go to if you go to a conference in [TS]

  portland and you're one of the speaker's [TS]

  they'll give you a gift bag and it [TS]

  always has a pound of stumptown coffee [TS]

  all you get in fegan infinity scarf as [TS]

  sleater-kinney CD and as such a coffee [TS]

  yeah exactly and so I i definitely will [TS]

  wait around in situations like that for [TS]

  to see like the three or four gift bags [TS]

  that don't get claimed sure and then i [TS]

  will go NAB the coffee out of here is [TS]

  the vernacular of the poor kid at [TS]

  lunchtime in the elementary school i'll [TS]

  have it i'll have it that's right now I [TS]

  like I use a hamburger of it i used to [TS]

  do that in elementary school I can [TS]

  totally see beyond the i'll have a guy [TS]

  could be like getting that bun that bun [TS]

  and anything to eat the pickles it's [TS]

  completely consistent with me that I [TS]

  would have been in a situation where [TS]

  they would have where I would have seen [TS]

  this bag of coffee envelopes and I would [TS]

  have looked for you know taking a look [TS]

  to the left take a look to the right [TS]

  realize that like this is my backstage [TS]

  these coffee envelopes are here for me [TS]

  and then I would have stuffed them in my [TS]

  guitar case without even knowing without [TS]

  even remembering having done it like I [TS]

  ever had one so anyway you like it like [TS]

  a squirrel like a squirrel write a [TS]

  letter Raven I've got my little bottles [TS]

  but they're all coffee [TS]

  uh-huh anyway so I found this in this [TS]

  guitar case and I and I SAT there and [TS]

  i'm looking at the guitar and I'm like [TS]

  when did I play this thing last live [TS]

  it's a weird guitar I would it would [TS]

  ideally would be like a primary tour [TS]

  guitar [TS]

  no this isn't a guitar that like I [TS]

  grabbed without thinking is a local gig [TS]

  or or I could have traveled with it but [TS]

  to an event where my expectation was [TS]

  that I was going to do something like [TS]

  fun and dumb rather than that i was [TS]

  going to seriously like use this guitar [TS]

  to play some tunes like 10 screws [TS]

  yeah but I I didn't bring it on the [TS]

  cruise it it was a so anyway that's the [TS]

  that's problem number two I can't [TS]

  remember where I was there it was so [TS]

  long ago that I that I that I can i have [TS]

  it please [TS]

  he's starbucks to suck at starbuck tubes [TS]

  and then updates on [TS]

  no I don't think so they're not they're [TS]

  not sitting here right in front of me [TS]

  but I but they've been sitting in a [TS]

  guitar case for at least a year that any [TS]

  day they got to be amazing so anyway I [TS]

  took him downstairs and I just made one [TS]

  and here's how i did it i took it I took [TS]

  a starbucks to bend and I had to really [TS]

  resist the impulse to use two of them [TS]

  but i just took one the the recommended [TS]

  serving size [TS]

  I poured it into a beer stein filled it [TS]

  with tap water and stuck it in the [TS]

  microwave for two minutes and now this [TS]

  brew is sitting in front of me here i [TS]

  have yet to taste okay i'm standing by [TS]

  i'm i'm on tenterhooks I can't wait to [TS]

  hear the third so it's kind of it's [TS]

  strangely granular John is addressing [TS]

  this time we go it's like a weird cuts [TS]

  very muddy here we go [TS]

  it's nice and one that does have a kind [TS]

  of chocolatey smell it smells like [TS]

  international coffee mmm I like it all [TS]

  right here we go [TS]

  oh this episode of rock on the wine is [TS]

  sponsored by our very good friends over [TS]

  at Squarespace you know Squarespace they [TS]

  are the only one platform that makes it [TS]

  fast and easy to create your own [TS]

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  it's simple enough for a podcaster to [TS]

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  Roderick on the wine to go there now get [TS]

  a free trial plus ten percent off any [TS]

  package you choose by using the special [TS]

  offer code supertrain when you checkout [TS]

  it helps us very much if you go and [TS]

  visit the sites can help you out very [TS]

  much if you sign up for a site [TS]

  John I want to send our thanks to [TS]

  squarespace for supporting rock around [TS]

  the line we could not do it without them [TS]

  so the verdict is a thumbs down [TS]

  oh it's terrible what is the flavor I'm [TS]

  okay first of all you really taste the [TS]

  tap water [TS]

  oh and then there's a there's almost [TS]

  like a burnt meat that you like it feels [TS]

  like it's just like the crusty and of a [TS]

  prime rib [TS]

  I guess that would go on under other on [TS]

  the tasting colored it's like me when [TS]

  i'm albert [TS]

  it's like burnt meat that's one of the [TS]

  flavors but also there's the chocolate [TS]

  smell and then tap water a mouth feel [TS]

  and then burnt meat [TS]

  yeah really can't get away from like [TS]

  them the the burning meat is coffee [TS]

  though it couldn't be the stein right is [TS]

  this time clean no no my styles are all [TS]

  are all perfectly prepared for coffee [TS]

  preparation showroom shine [TS]

  yeah he's here Wow and then yeah then [TS]

  there's something there's something [TS]

  dirty about the finish like it's kind of [TS]

  like Mercedes exhaust m-might wake up [TS]

  like a bus station seat [TS]

  yeah like a little bit of a diesel [TS]

  components hmm [TS]

  wow are you would have to be really and [TS]

  it's our to you have to be really really [TS]

  really in need of some coffee but it's [TS]

  often em you okay well do things first [TS]

  of all like how does it compare to his [TS]

  first thing is that when soon as you [TS]

  mentioned this I [TS]

  really really really want a coffee and [TS]

  there's no way i can make a coffee right [TS]

  now without making a ton of noise so I'm [TS]

  not doing that but then after you didn't [TS]

  enjoy it you said it tasted like a [TS]

  German car [TS]

  I'm not isn't have a coffee now isn't [TS]

  that funny thing turns out power of [TS]

  suggestion turns out the other thing is [TS]

  that how does that on the continuum of [TS]

  bad coffee how does it stand alongside [TS]

  things like gas station outside of town [TS]

  last third of the pot coffee has a stand [TS]

  next to like days in like in your motel [TS]

  room coffee mmm conference conference [TS]

  conference at a hotel coffee so the so [TS]

  it seems to me that coffee that has been [TS]

  sitting all day and brewing all day and [TS]

  gets that kind of burned taste the [TS]

  burned-over brood taste is throughout [TS]

  the coffee experience right it becomes a [TS]

  thicker like more a it fit it feels that [TS]

  the coffee itself feels like the taste [TS]

  is opaque it is it is throughout whereas [TS]

  this the burned coffee flavor is a taste [TS]

  that is floating on the top of a kind of [TS]

  watery base [TS]

  oh so that it's not it doesn't have the [TS]

  full like sour you get the full majesty [TS]

  of the canyon tank that you would at the [TS]

  bottom of the tank that's right the [TS]

  Kenyan tank leave the the the proximity [TS]

  to a restroom that's being used by [TS]

  truckers the the hot cases on the other [TS]

  side with some JoJo's in it like all of [TS]

  that you've you taste in the truck stop [TS]

  mhm now a days in like in your room [TS]

  coffee does that was disgusting little [TS]

  coffee makers and lots of other people [TS]

  have used oh yeah those not a horrible [TS]

  thought that has a battery of the same [TS]

  kind of watery quality [TS]

  yeah but they go to great lengths to [TS]

  take the burn out of it and I feel like [TS]

  the burn element has been injected into [TS]

  these starbucks pouches in order to give [TS]

  you this [TS]

  the in order to maybe try and conjure [TS]

  the sensation of [TS]

  um like dark roast right that's what it [TS]

  feels like it feels like somebody in a [TS]

  laboratory has figured out what dark [TS]

  roast tastes like and then they put it [TS]

  and then they made it into a powder and [TS]

  they think what you know fuck it [TS]

  they're having coffee out of a to what [TS]

  do they know exactly they said they [TS]

  probably had starbucks in there and [TS]

  they're slightly burnt tasting coffee [TS]

  before no this is this is gonna be fine [TS]

  yeah this is really and and then to top [TS]

  it all off the the crystals to leave [TS]

  just a slightly granular ill it's really [TS]

  it's really mesmerizingly bad we can [TS]

  have another i'm definitely going to [TS]

  keep him around i'll probably serve them [TS]

  to guests you know when somebody comes [TS]

  and wants to talk to me about pretty [TS]

  good better sharp stick in the eye [TS]

  always say you know like better than [TS]

  nothing right [TS]

  the guy that comes to the dorm is like [TS]

  have you ever considered replacing your [TS]

  windows make this a really good cover [TS]

  cotton haha let's sit and talk about [TS]

  this [TS]

  are you cooking meats or did you know I [TS]

  had never occurred to me to replace my [TS]

  windows until now until you showed up I [TS]

  mean obviously 25 people have come and [TS]

  ask me the same question over the last [TS]

  10 years [TS]

  you're not going to believe this but I [TS]

  was just sitting here preparing a coffee [TS]

  for myself and thinking about how I need [TS]

  new windows up still come to our door [TS]

  for anything [TS]

  isn't it amazing that that still happens [TS]

  at all i just assume it's a burglar [TS]

  well and the thing is that sometimes you [TS]

  get a you get people coming door to door [TS]

  when you live in a neighborhood as I do [TS]

  you can come in door to door work where [TS]

  you get a sense like oh this is somebody [TS]

  who belongs in sales this is somebody [TS]

  who would be a good salesperson if they [TS]

  just had the Glengarry leads but what [TS]

  they've got is they showed up somewhere [TS]

  to that they answered an ad in the [TS]

  newspaper showed up to a seminar learn [TS]

  to sell windows door-to-door went to the [TS]

  days and drank the coffee [TS]

  that's right hand on the starter kit did [TS]

  the day-long thing and now they're out [TS]

  here and there selling windows and the [TS]

  only reason that you that you that that [TS]

  would be your life the only reason you [TS]

  would you would [TS]

  b of 45 year old guy standing on my [TS]

  porch not taking no for an answer is [TS]

  that you fallen on hard times something [TS]

  some twists in the road [TS]

  yeah resulted in you needing to decide [TS]

  this late in life that door-to-door [TS]

  sales are going to be your friend nobody [TS]

  nobody gets the results in their job oh [TS]

  when they're 70 go be a middle-aged [TS]

  window salesman [TS]

  yeah right like this is a guy who's [TS]

  probably living in his car haha yeah but [TS]

  you know what he's not he still presents [TS]

  well so I always sit and look at them [TS]

  and I'm like what's the problem is it [TS]

  alcoholism is it like what is the what [TS]

  is the failing is it gambling debts [TS]

  recent divorce or like Boeing you know [TS]

  layoffs but I don't think about you know [TS]

  like sales [TS]

  yeah can I get a freebie though yeah [TS]

  windows the clear choice is that that's [TS]

  gotta be somebody slogan alright it's [TS]

  pretty great huh [TS]

  windows the clear choice that would [TS]

  that's a great title for our seminar but [TS]

  right that is good [TS]

  ah i have I do feel dude are you a [TS]

  member of Junior Achievement right [TS]

  no that was totally opaque to me the [TS]

  junior achievement Future Farmers of [TS]

  America they're all these groups that [TS]

  really seemed like cults to me i really [TS]

  do your team had a cool logo in there na [TS]

  it's a day and was very stylized because [TS]

  that one of them was a triangle if [TS]

  memory serves [TS]

  well the thing about junior achievement [TS]

  that I liked was that it attracted the [TS]

  brassy girls and you know I'm know about [TS]

  your new Rix's that's right i like a [TS]

  brassy girl and so in high school I got [TS]

  roped into junior achievement at one [TS]

  point and you know i think there was a [TS]

  time in my junior year when I really was [TS]

  trying to decide what my course of [TS]

  action was going to be I guess that's [TS]

  not uncommon that's what your junior is [TS]

  for going to transcend if you spend a [TS]

  lot of time on alone and orange flight [TS]

  suit there's going to be things you need [TS]

  to figure out and even in even as a [TS]

  junior I was like well [TS]

  what my course of action is is to be the [TS]

  retired director of the CIA what are you [TS]

  talking about like how do you get there [TS]

  it's too late for me to go to Yale which [TS]

  would be a shoo-in but like how am I [TS]

  supposed to and there were voices [TS]

  whispering in my ear that business [TS]

  business business you know that's what [TS]

  they think that's the cult that they [TS]

  really try and put into kids business [TS]

  business business except for the weird [TS]

  things that cause like they were those [TS]

  phrases that you were here and I would [TS]

  even hear them and use them and not even [TS]

  really know what they meant the to the [TS]

  kind of minor business and marketing and [TS]

  we have class on your marketing and it's [TS]

  kind of about advertising [TS]

  yeah but but if you here's the weird [TS]

  part was like you're in my yeah right [TS]

  obviously I don't even know [TS]

  did you know what the phrase public [TS]

  relations meant when you were in junior [TS]

  high I thought it meant like like [TS]

  meeting people [TS]

  well I i did i had a better idea because [TS]

  people used to say to me this is one of [TS]

  those things that adults would say to me [TS]

  when I was 13 14 years old like oh you [TS]

  should go into public relations because [TS]

  you're good with people [TS]

  yeah and i would say what is that it may [TS]

  be like oh like you could be IBM's [TS]

  public relations sky [TS]

  my mom used to say I think my mom didn't [TS]

  know what it meant either and she was [TS]

  taking know if I want real estate really [TS]

  like to be in public relations because i [TS]

  like working with people [TS]

  yeah and I mean is an ideal not begging [TS]

  for articles about you that's really [TS]

  what public relations is haha patent [TS]

  idea but it was that it was like being [TS]

  the president's press secretary that you [TS]

  stood at the podium and reporters [TS]

  shouted questions at you I and you were [TS]

  like I'm the public relations man and [TS]

  let me answer that question be a jolly [TS]

  garrulous fellow full autonomy well and [TS]

  that was what people that was when [TS]

  adults said you should go into public [TS]

  relations that's what they imagined that [TS]

  I would be great i would be the great [TS]

  spokesperson for a company it was like [TS]

  let me answer your question that was it [TS]

  means that means that means that means [TS]

  you're like you get your greasy link [TS]

  beggar right well now the average the [TS]

  industry's changed but every monday i [TS]

  get 40 emails from all the publicist [TS]

  that have me [TS]

  their list they're just like hi friend [TS]

  this is like really sweet about this [TS]

  paper don't book group but I so I join [TS]

  junior achievement and i sat in the [TS]

  meetings and at one point and at it and [TS]

  the adult supervisors were trying to get [TS]

  us to walk us through the entire process [TS]

  of starting a business and we had to [TS]

  choose what our product was going to be [TS]

  and it's not like it's and we saw and we [TS]

  decided it was chocolate we're going to [TS]

  we're going to make sure we're gonna [TS]

  make what was it like chocolate brittle [TS]

  and nut bars and like a white chocolate [TS]

  figured prominently in it [TS]

  oh and so so much like the real world he [TS]

  just decided what product you're gonna [TS]

  say that's right and then you decide [TS]

  that me i'm a window man is the clear [TS]

  choice and then we then we went into [TS]

  manufacturing so we bought bulk nuts and [TS]

  chocolate and we actually in junior [TS]

  achievement class cooked them down and [TS]

  made them into bark what charade package [TS]

  them up and then then began the real [TS]

  process of basically selling them to our [TS]

  friends telling them to our friends [TS]

  parents and it was a total it was a [TS]

  total like Girl Scout scam where junior [TS]

  achievement just became door-to-door [TS]

  sales or you would stayed stand out in [TS]

  front of the costco at eight o'clock at [TS]

  night with your junior achievement the [TS]

  podium it has it [TS]

  yeah your best in your little folding [TS]

  table and you like buy some chocolate to [TS]

  support Junior Achievement that's is [TS]

  super interesting to me because we did [TS]

  the same thing in key club which is not [TS]

  but it's haha i was in the key club [TS]

  member of a key club now and key club [TS]

  was like junior kiwanis to your kiwanis [TS]

  right kiwanis one of the many many clubs [TS]

  I joined because there was a girl that I [TS]

  liked it and and we the government [TS]

  teacher grassy no she she was worried [TS]

  about offending your clothes [TS]

  she shoes in there and i went and and [TS]

  that mr. Sherwood who taught Americanism [TS]

  vs communism was also the sponsor of the [TS]

  key club right and and he the entire and [TS]

  all I remember of any of this means [TS]

  anything anything all i remember was the [TS]

  cookies and the cookies was he brought [TS]

  into use on the anti-communist well yeah [TS]

  installing says kiwanis like like after [TS]

  communism but that was an actual class [TS]

  until nineteen until the year I took it [TS]

  in 1984 it was still called comparative [TS]

  government colon Americanism vs [TS]

  communism was not great it's very smart [TS]

  because of course it's not capital [TS]

  capitalism person communism Americanism [TS]

  think like that that's really a word but [TS]

  mr. Sherwood brought in this is so great [TS]

  he brought in time so I don't know why [TS]

  remembering this he brought in his [TS]

  wife's world famous recipe for cookies [TS]

  and can i tell you what the chief [TS]

  selling point cook his offer and they [TS]

  never go bad [TS]

  Wow cookies that never go bad ok the [TS]

  biggest client doesn't think of all the [TS]

  food that you've had think of all the [TS]

  coffee you have drunk out of your guitar [TS]

  case [TS]

  think about how many things on your list [TS]

  of favorite foods are there because they [TS]

  never go bad and these were we made them [TS]

  like to the last teaspoon we made these [TS]

  exactly right and they're the worst [TS]

  thing I've ever had in my mouth [TS]

  inclusive and then we had to go out and [TS]

  sell them so what I'm trying to say to [TS]

  you John as I think these are all cults [TS]

  they're all moneymakers it's like going [TS]

  in some flowers at the airport [TS]

  well you know I want to live in a world [TS]

  Merlin where the Air Force has to have a [TS]

  bake sale to buy a bomber and the bumper [TS]

  sticker industry needs larger cars to [TS]

  fit all the bumper stickers a paragraph [TS]

  the problem the problem obviously is [TS]

  that adults have no imagination adults [TS]

  in schools there they have no sense of [TS]

  what businesses between danger maybe [TS]

  during the communism and not Americanism [TS]

  and they are cooking up these like I [TS]

  mean there was nothing that pushed me [TS]

  away from business faster than the idea [TS]

  that if I went to business school I [TS]

  would just end up outside of Thunderbird [TS]

  business schools selfie fucking white [TS]

  chocolate bark what you want a nutbar [TS]

  and I have an MBA and i'm so nuts but I [TS]

  market yet nutbar [TS]

  but you know it's all a scam because i [TS]

  think by the way just gonna say that mr. [TS]

  Sherwood who is his name will cut out of [TS]

  this mr. was awesome he was great he [TS]

  wrote me my recommendation letter for [TS]

  college he was fantastic and also a huge [TS]

  double dipper he was a retired I think [TS]

  lieutenant colonel [TS]

  I think he's been in Korea maybe World [TS]

  War Two and a full-time job as a teacher [TS]

  si si so he's getting his full [TS]

  retirement that's Americanism and he's [TS]

  working as a teacher from imparting to [TS]

  the next generation all of the hard-won [TS]

  lessons that he learned running up the [TS]

  hill in John and fairness he's combining [TS]

  elements of Americanism with elements of [TS]

  communism [TS]

  that's a pretty good gig he is in a [TS]

  position to help us reflect connect and [TS]

  his wife has a killer recipe for cookies [TS]

  that don't go bad [TS]

  well I said so I'm thinking about this a [TS]

  lot all scams every one of these is a [TS]

  scam [TS]

  well they're they're deep least 30 [TS]

  please cami and all businesses game [TS]

  business business PR and marketing sales [TS]

  sales i would like that i would like to [TS]

  see most people contrast sales marketing [TS]

  sales marketing PR publicity sales [TS]

  marketing PR publicity second part [TS]

  they're all part of the same wing of a [TS]

  cover corporate like flowchart right [TS]

  sales marketing PR publicity they're all [TS]

  marketing bleeds into product but their [TS]

  own well but I mean that's all under the [TS]

  VP of Sales isn't like there's a [TS]

  marketing right you got social cloud [TS]

  platform cookies but think about it I on [TS]

  buddy i don't know if you noticed but [TS]

  this year the the girl scouts were out [TS]

  of control [TS]

  I it's about it I you know I wanna be [TS]

  supportive [TS]

  I want to be supportive of the young [TS]

  ladies but no you like to support the [TS]

  girls like to support the girls if you [TS]

  let you know you ever you have a girl [TS]

  you've got to decide if she's the clear [TS]

  choice a big burger brownie it's very [TS]

  frustrating to me that all at once at [TS]

  the same time like the entire city if [TS]

  you go to this neighborhood your house [TS]

  the place we went to goodwill that time [TS]

  was portal on every corner there's like [TS]

  the encampment of Girl Scouts there [TS]

  they could have their rifles stacked in [TS]

  a pyramid and their first standing [TS]

  around it sound like the wire [TS]

  it's a lot like Baltimore and don't give [TS]

  me the money the you I know now what I [TS]

  don't know man [TS]

  hey it's troubling to me though that [TS]

  like this obviously this is the owner [TS]

  this is like how they pay for girl [TS]

  scouts it's just weird to me that they [TS]

  do it by selling sugar was here it's odd [TS]

  well and and I'm thinking I'm thinking [TS]

  this was what terrified me about sales [TS]

  when I was young was the like the [TS]

  palpable desperation in the eyes of [TS]

  everyone that ever talk to know you'll [TS]

  need this one he know you know that that [TS]

  feeling of like every like every sale is [TS]

  every sale it's it's it's a [TS]

  make-or-break situation like the last [TS]

  year you're only as good as your last [TS]

  sale or you're only as good as your next [TS]

  sale and watching people in sales and [TS]

  and I mean I actually the last time i [TS]

  was in san francisco i talk i talked [TS]

  about this on the on Roderick on the [TS]

  line with you i think i might have [TS]

  talked about it on you look nice today [TS]

  ok then releasing that exception but but [TS]

  uh but I went into a that preppy clothes [TS]

  airer that I was very excited to finally [TS]

  visit and I went in there and I bought [TS]

  two suits and all right i do you [TS]

  remember this yeah about two suits and [TS]

  it's taken me several months to unpack [TS]

  the entire experience for because i have [TS]

  a tailor now here in Seattle who has [TS]

  taught me an enormous amount about how [TS]

  close it [TS]

  how close are meant to fit men's clothes [TS]

  and in in so doing he has like kind of [TS]

  the scales have fallen from my eyes he [TS]

  has taught me what to look for in close [TS]

  and I've realized that a lot of the [TS]

  clothes that I thought [TS]

  fits a lot of the clothes that I thought [TS]

  fit me that I owned did not fit me [TS]

  interesting it's kinda like your [TS]

  Palestinian mechanic like you've got an [TS]

  insider's view now you you understand [TS]

  the industry now a little bit a little [TS]

  bit and and and the problem with the [TS]

  with the way clothes fit if you put them [TS]

  on and you're like oh it fits me here if [TS]

  it's me hear it fits me hear it [TS]

  fence and my tailor looks at the same [TS]

  suit is like oh boy this thing not only [TS]

  doesn't it fit but it's too its it fits [TS]

  so poorly that it's too hard to fix like [TS]

  you can't just shorten the student once [TS]

  you got here so this is the thing [TS]

  Wow one of the suits that i bought at [TS]

  the San Francisco clothier that I was [TS]

  very excited about turns out does not [TS]

  fit me at all and in reflecting upon it [TS]

  when the when the little tailor came out [TS]

  from behind the curtain to fit this [TS]

  garment to me because alterations were [TS]

  made to this garment alterations that [TS]

  you know that added a considerable [TS]

  expense to the purchase price were made [TS]

  to this garment when he came out from [TS]

  behind the curtain a look a dark look [TS]

  across his face and the salesman who is [TS]

  also the owner of the store and the son [TS]

  of the founder had a very fast talking [TS]

  like chummy car salesman kind of pattern [TS]

  and he looked at the taylor over my [TS]

  shoulder and I'm looking in the mirror [TS]

  at myself in this suit thinking to [TS]

  myself boy don't I look sharp and what [TS]

  I'm looking at is this is the kind of [TS]

  suit i want is the kind of this is the [TS]

  color of soot that I've wanted for a [TS]

  long time [TS]

  this is the kind of suit that I've [TS]

  wanted for a long time and the aspects [TS]

  of it that aren't fitting [TS]

  the salesman is saying like oh we got [TS]

  Taylor out here and we'll get this taken [TS]

  care of you know this is no problem [TS]

  we'll just get him to but up poop too [TS]

  huh [TS]

  and so I'm looking in the mirror and I'm [TS]

  pretty proud of myself and I'm imagining [TS]

  all he's just going to take up the [TS]

  sleeping she's convinced she's going to [TS]

  shorten the collar it's gonna be and I [TS]

  see this dark look go across the [TS]

  tailor's face which i did not recognize [TS]

  at the time because i was in the [TS]

  excitement of the moment and because the [TS]

  salesman was patterning in my ear I see [TS]

  a dark look and then I hear the salesman [TS]

  say over my other shoulder he says [TS]

  Ricardo we're trying to sell some suits [TS]

  here [TS]

  Wow [TS]

  and then he goes back to talking to me [TS]

  and what he's saying what now I have [TS]

  unpacked that moment [TS]

  ricardo came out from the back saw that [TS]

  the suit did not fit me at all and the [TS]

  salesman saw the look and preempted any [TS]

  comment from Ricardo by saying we're [TS]

  trying to sell some suits here and so [TS]

  required thanks the obvious now how the [TS]

  wow so Ricardo just like didn't even [TS]

  visibly shrug and he went about what I [TS]

  imagined from a tailor's perspective is [TS]

  this deal with the devil where his he's [TS]

  employed by this guy and he is being [TS]

  asked to make suits that don't fit [TS]

  he's being asked to do tailoring on [TS]

  suits that are like it's by him in his [TS]

  profession an abomination [TS]

  he turned into a monster is basically [TS]

  yeah he's basically serving his master [TS]

  he sees like the guy who gets called in [TS]

  once a month to trim andy warhol's wig [TS]

  haha that's a good look for you bossa [TS]

  well and I'm sure like I'm sure at the [TS]

  end of the day or when he goes into the [TS]

  the darkest room in the tailor's guild [TS]

  and sits down before the the tribunal [TS]

  like he has to go into the confession [TS]

  booth and say i have made size 46 Long's [TS]

  i have sold 46 longs to a 44 long [TS]

  and there was nothing I could do and [TS]

  they have said no you do not get into [TS]

  heaven but like it's an apology type [TS]

  situation we just empty out the box and [TS]

  like just you've got to make this thing [TS]

  fit together even though it was never [TS]

  meant to work well yeah and so and so [TS]

  what what has happened is it's taken me [TS]

  this long so sad for Ricardo well I do [TS]

  too but I feel so bad for myself then I [TS]

  put on the suit now and now that I have [TS]

  now that I've been shown how as soon as [TS]

  I meant to fit i go-oh to get this suit [TS]

  to fit i am going to have to have my [TS]

  tailor remake it basically at great [TS]

  expense or i can say this is a loss and [TS]

  it was a you know it was a very [TS]

  expensive learning experience but I [TS]

  continue to get email blasts from this [TS]

  to this company and close the air blasts [TS]

  i get i'm on their mailing list and they [TS]

  sent me these like come on in for a [TS]

  special fitting fifty percent off all [TS]

  men shirts and when i first started [TS]

  getting these email blasts I was like [TS]

  you know what I'm not going to put a [TS]

  google filter on these and consign them [TS]

  all to the garbage dump [TS]

  I'm gonna I'm gonna look at these [TS]

  because I had such a nice experience at [TS]

  that Taylor and maybe i'll keep maybe [TS]

  this is the beginning of a relationship [TS]

  maybe i'm going to buy ties from this [TS]

  guy for 40 years maybe every time i hear [TS]

  daughters for your daughter's wedding [TS]

  you go there to get a tox you get a text [TS]

  that's right this is this heartbreaking [TS]

  job this is gonna be my place the the [TS]

  family-owned little clothing earlier [TS]

  report in California this is my this is [TS]

  my like airport airplane mechanic and as [TS]

  the as the week's have progressed two [TS]

  months and I've realized that this guy [TS]

  in his salesman a frenzy to get me out [TS]

  the door that day in a suit and his [TS]

  willingness to sell me a suit that [TS]

  didn't fit he knew it didn't fit and he [TS]

  and he enlisted his tailor in a [TS]

  conspiracy [TS]

  to not reveal to me that it didn't fit [TS]

  these emails that i get from this [TS]

  company have gone from little-little [TS]

  missives of joy little imaginings of [TS]

  myself being an old man wandering around [TS]

  the house in my smoking jacket made by [TS]

  this company now they are little [TS]

  reminders of horror and I am and I want [TS]

  to and I feel like now that this guy [TS]

  probably was on cocaine and I want [TS]

  nothing to do with this store i would if [TS]

  they if they start maybe ricardas maybe [TS]

  he's got the goods on Ricardo and maybe [TS]

  Ricardo's father worked for his father [TS]

  something but like that he's not allowed [TS]

  to work anywhere else I think Ricardo [TS]

  probably worked for his father Carl is [TS]

  an old man that's in a good boss is [TS]

  right that's right and and he you know [TS]

  he lives back there behind the curtain [TS]

  probably in a refrigerator box that has [TS]

  a window cut out in it with what the [TS]

  fuck the thoughtful it and this guy is [TS]

  like this guy holds the papers on his [TS]

  kids or something [TS]

  yes and and you know and now and it's [TS]

  all because of that salesman moment [TS]

  where this guy was thinking this guy was [TS]

  thinking I'm gonna sell this suit today [TS]

  trying to sell some suits here and he [TS]

  was not practicing what I'm sure his [TS]

  father practiced which is like hey let [TS]

  me make you a customer for life and all [TS]

  he had to do was say you know what that [TS]

  suit doesn't fit you we don't have one [TS]

  in your size sorry i don't think you [TS]

  should buy it and I would be like you [TS]

  sir are a man of integrity and instead [TS]

  you know i'm basically I'm i have [TS]

  committed myself to a lifetime at war [TS]

  with this bit with this person and I [TS]

  want to shame this guy with him out it [TS]

  but you know what he gave you what you [TS]

  wanted he saw you coming he saw you [TS]

  coming he knew he knew when you came [TS]

  into that story you were looking for [TS]

  some old-world fucking suits [TS]

  and we're looking to do to be a dad that [TS]

  he saw that companies like tourists in [TS]

  town i'm gonna give this guy the [TS]

  business myself on that 46 that's right [TS]

  here comes the room here's the here's [TS]

  the the guy from the sticks who doesn't [TS]

  wear a suit he doesn't know how suit [TS]

  supposed to fit kick kick back through [TS]

  cart get anything box cattle Ricardo [TS]

  iono hey any rings the bell Ricardo's [TS]

  like Oh Papa something oh he comes out [TS]

  just like oh please don't make me get [TS]

  this suit to this guy and so anyway I [TS]

  mean now you have somebody showing you [TS]

  the truth you got somebody who's [TS]

  teaching you know you feel like you [TS]

  trust this guy the right your-your-your [TS]

  Seattle tail your trust [TS]

  well the Seattle Taylor I trust [TS]

  implicitly because he says things like [TS]

  you know this is going to cost a hundred [TS]

  bucks to to do and you know i mean i [TS]

  will do it if you tell me too but I [TS]

  don't see the I don't see how you can [TS]

  see again like a good mechanic that's [TS]

  what I was like about our mechanic was [TS]

  he always tell us like this is this is [TS]

  in your not going to drive out here [TS]

  without fixing this this is broken [TS]

  this is a thing that you're definitely [TS]

  need to take care of in the next year [TS]

  better to do it now and here's a bunch [TS]

  of stuff that you could do or don't do [TS]

  and I and that has given that guy so [TS]

  much credibility with me over the years [TS]

  yeah you know I mean and my new mechanic [TS]

  is like that now my old mechanic was a [TS]

  guy that that i took my stuff to for [TS]

  years and years and years and the [TS]

  falling out that he and i had was he [TS]

  said your your truck needs a new brake [TS]

  job that needs an entire brake job it's [TS]

  you know 1,200 bucks and I was like well [TS]

  in all honesty like do you think it's [TS]

  worth it gives a likely lifetime [TS]

  yeah this is that this is one of those [TS]

  questions friend-to-friend do you think [TS]

  it's worth it to do this work and he uh [TS]

  you know and like a cold light shone on [TS]

  him and he shrugged his shoulders and [TS]

  said it's up to you [TS]

  hmm and I was like after all the work [TS]

  that I've had done here [TS]

  you you're gonna you're gonna just fade [TS]

  you're going to suddenly turn into not a [TS]

  human [TS]

  uh-huh you're just like a you're just a [TS]

  fixer bot now and it's entirely up to me [TS]

  and you're not gonna give me any advice [TS]

  and be known what he was saying was well [TS]

  I want the 1,200 bucks so I'm not going [TS]

  to tell you not to do it right up but [TS]

  I'm not going to sit here and argue [TS]

  against you paying me for work that is [TS]

  like good money after bad and I guess [TS]

  it's that good money after bad thing [TS]

  where that's where somebody really shows [TS]

  me their integrity at least it can [TS]

  introduce these other axes to it yeah [TS]

  absolutely i think i don't have one [TS]

  piece of automotive advice which is if [TS]

  if carry the mechanic tells you you're [TS]

  really really really need to replace the [TS]

  timing belt in the next month and then [TS]

  over the next year your wife literally [TS]

  bags you three different times to fix [TS]

  the timing belt and Jerry reminds you [TS]

  that if the timing belt breaks it's [TS]

  going to be extremely it's going to be [TS]

  like an order of magnitude more costly [TS]

  to fix that if we just do this one [TS]

  simple fucking thing Merlin if that [TS]

  happens go ahead and just get the timing [TS]

  belt fixed [TS]

  yeah there's a lot more expensive after [TS]

  it breaks what ho what i end up doing is [TS]

  wandering around the parking lot of a [TS]

  fred meyer holding a broken timing belt [TS]

  and saying hey I'm from out of town my [TS]

  wife and kids in the car around the [TS]

  corner and I just need five dollars [TS]

  it's one o'clock in the morning but I [TS]

  just need five dollars to get this [TS]

  timing belt replaced by window comes [TS]

  with a free nutbar [TS]

  I do idea when I was down when i was at [TS]

  the conference on world affairs and now [TS]

  in Colorado a switch time was that John [TS]

  the most recent ok the the gal that [TS]

  student who was assigned as my student [TS]

  ambassador who was supposed to drive [TS]

  around town and like be helpful i said [TS]

  to her on the first day like what would [TS]

  be majoring in and she said business and [TS]

  I said so what are you doing [TS]

  at this what were you doing at this [TS]

  conference on world affairs why are you [TS]

  engaged in that and then I said wait [TS]

  don't don't tell me let me guess you're [TS]

  majoring in business because it was [TS]

  because advice was given to you that [TS]

  that was a practical and and the [TS]

  practical major a major for successful [TS]

  people and she was like yeah and I said [TS]

  but your heart really lies in the arts [TS]

  and she said yeah and I said and so [TS]

  you're dabbling in the conference on [TS]

  world affairs because you want to be [TS]

  involved you want to engage with people [TS]

  who are like doing interesting [TS]

  thoughtful work she was like yeah but [TS]

  you're still you're still like putting [TS]

  in the hours on your business degree [TS]

  because you don't want to disappoint [TS]

  your parents she was like yeah I was [TS]

  like but eventually you feel like you're [TS]

  going to try and use your business [TS]

  degree in the arts in some way doing art [TS]

  business and she was like how do you [TS]

  know all this is this your cart was like [TS]

  o.o young lady [TS]

  yeah oh you poor poor darlin how do you [TS]

  think she'll turn out well she seemed [TS]

  like a great moment as an individual she [TS]

  seemed great because she seemed like it [TS]

  absolutely a terrible fit in business [TS]

  and the business understanding whatever [TS]

  that constitutes whatever business [TS]

  understanding they are they managed to [TS]

  actually impart to you in business [TS]

  school which I imagine is at the level [TS]

  of like like white chocolate bark key [TS]

  look it's not going to it's not going to [TS]

  hurt her as she moves into wanting to [TS]

  work in the arts and she's 21 and [TS]

  already has this knowledge of herself so [TS]

  it's not like she's going to spend 15 [TS]

  years in hvac sales before before she [TS]

  realizes that what you really want to do [TS]

  is write a novel like she's already [TS]

  transitioning [TS]

  there's there's more stuff is more [TS]

  reasons to discover stuff like that [TS]

  sooner [TS]

  used to be I think that's absolutely [TS]

  right and you see your friends come out [TS]

  of I mean John I i I'm sorry to keep [TS]

  returning I think I used that is a [TS]

  drinking game he mention college but my [TS]

  entire college career i mean a year of [TS]

  college in 1986 including but so that's [TS]

  like six years of college now it [TS]

  well yeah exactly exactly i mean its [TS]

  in-state tuition at one of the best [TS]

  public schools in America was such that [TS]

  that's the new new college the new [TS]

  school yeah new college was like the top [TS]

  among the they call it the public IVs [TS]

  and yeah but it was out the door like [TS]

  including any Navy including tuition all [TS]

  that it's it was under six grand a year [TS]

  wow when I think that include housing [TS]

  maybe not books and stuff like that but [TS]

  you know exist planet [TS]

  yeah well this is the joke with my lady [TS]

  when I met my lady [TS]

  you know i was working in menlo park [TS]

  she's working at Stanford and we would [TS]

  joke we would laugh haha good laugh to [TS]

  Stanford and Stanford undergrad constant [TS]

  forty thousand dollars a year then yeah [TS]

  yeah and and what I mean like oh my gosh [TS]

  can you even imagine and now class [TS]

  people in college now what it costs for [TS]

  your college it's it's I mean that ain't [TS]

  that unusual anymore [TS]

  yeah and so can you imagine coming out I [TS]

  mean knowing the meager things i [TS]

  accidentally picked up in college even [TS]

  taking all that into account [TS]

  I can't imagine being 22 23 years old [TS]

  and having over a hundred thousand [TS]

  dollars in debt my crazy entering [TS]

  entering this fucking job market with [TS]

  your business degree and $100,000 in [TS]

  debt [TS]

  well particularly plenty of chances to [TS]

  figure out the name for you lady [TS]

  particularly sense i would say i would [TS]

  say conservatively 60-percent of what's [TS]

  being taught in colleges now is trade [TS]

  school education like if you have a [TS]

  degree in computer science and I don't I [TS]

  i know that there are a lot of our [TS]

  listeners who have multiple degrees in [TS]

  computer science but let me just say and [TS]

  I and I appreciate you all and love i [TS]

  love our fans [TS]

  you're about the documents let me you [TS]

  don't know that are you the computer [TS]

  science is a trade trade and future [TS]

  sciences a trade its a math gets a bunch [TS]

  of math classes what and what point did [TS]

  we decide that now learning to program [TS]

  it's a lot of math at what point do we [TS]

  decide that math was like the computer [TS]

  i'm talking not about math but computer [TS]

  man say the last paragraph in your dad's [TS]

  voice when we listened computer map just [TS]

  different from math if somebody is [TS]

  sitting with matt somebody's sitting in [TS]

  a room where the light is streaming in [TS]

  and there's a shelf of bookcases and [TS]

  they're staring out the window and then [TS]

  thinking about math then yes that's an [TS]

  art I agree that that isn't that that [TS]

  those that kind of maths and I and I [TS]

  would put an s at the end Jack as an [TS]

  english-style yeah English Maths oxford [TS]

  maths those are those belong in the [TS]

  college of arts and sciences but if you [TS]

  are wasting their money on computer math [TS]

  computer baths you could get that at the [TS]

  itt technical school [TS]

  oh my god and that's where that should [TS]

  be taught computer math work on the [TS]

  street like beat it [TS]

  well because more and more every time I [TS]

  talk to a computer person they are [TS]

  saying oh now i'm using XDA html5 and [TS]

  these languages now are sorry easy to [TS]

  use because all you have to do is say to [TS]

  the computer computer make an appt what [TS]

  slight safeword get at it you put a [TS]

  couple of Colin's backslashes and then [TS]

  the math is done for you by the machine [TS]

  the thing is that i don't understand the [TS]

  episodes you definitely put out i don't [TS]

  understand it [TS]

  most of his big touring colleges now and [TS]

  business the entire business trade [TS]

  school it's a trace great school [TS]

  it's a trade school the entire of you [TS]

  know like if it unless you unless your [TS]

  education involves a certain number of [TS]

  hours sitting in a window sitting in a [TS]

  room staring out the window then you [TS]

  don't need to be in college college is [TS]

  basically a building of windows may just [TS]

  be stared out of and every once in a [TS]

  while you talk to somebody in a tweet [TS]

  jacket and heat and he asked and in [TS]

  answer to your questions he asks you [TS]

  more questions [TS]

  look to your left and look to your right [TS]

  one of those will fail out of trade [TS]

  school maths if you have you asked a [TS]

  professor a question and he gives you an [TS]

  answer that is not phrased as a question [TS]

  you know you belong in trade school I [TS]

  think I blacked out at some point I so [TS]

  you're saying it's not a good deal i'm [TS]

  saying that college that what we've done [TS]

  as a as a country is at a certain point [TS]

  fifty sixty years ago we decided that [TS]

  College was the symbol of upward [TS]

  mobility that that my parents didn't go [TS]

  to college and i'm going to go to [TS]

  college or I didn't go to college and [TS]

  i'm going to put my son through college [TS]

  and that's how we know that America is [TS]

  growing and that we are providing [TS]

  opportunity to find you just get your [TS]

  ticket punched for an office job that's [TS]

  all it is too [TS]

  that's pretty much other is right that's [TS]

  saying and so so when and we have [TS]

  increased on we have increased [TS]

  dramatically on the technical side the [TS]

  amount of technical knowledge that's [TS]

  required to have a basic job now but [TS]

  getting of our colons and stuff you [TS]

  gotta know about call he had nowhere to [TS]

  put the back HTML you gotta know about a [TS]

  bit ly and that and you got it know [TS]

  about you know you gotta put stuff in a [TS]

  cloud but all of that is the equivalence [TS]

  you know it is it's basically the quote [TS]

  the equivalent of of knowing how to [TS]

  operate a steam engine [TS]

  you know it's not true operating esteem [TS]

  it was very difficult [TS]

  oh my goodness it was very difficult and [TS]

  now the steam the steam that is powering [TS]

  the steam engine is bits and then its [TS]

  cloud its class basically clouds your [TS]

  platform or social yet full circle [TS]

  kunisada cloud I I feel bad for that gal [TS]

  that's tough boy having hear all that [TS]

  advice but you know that occurs to me is [TS]

  like if you think about like almost [TS]

  everybody we know just fell ass [TS]

  backwards into something and who knows [TS]

  right it's just equus right moment snap [TS]

  together like magnets [TS]

  who knows why anything turns out the way [TS]

  it does the college could just be by [TS]

  virtue of the fact that college mostly [TS]

  kept you out of trouble for really [TS]

  difficult years is a good thing for a [TS]

  lot of people don't know it's difficult [TS]

  it's difficult to control for all the [TS]

  different ways the college leads to [TS]

  success but you have to include things [TS]

  like networking you have to include I [TS]

  mean but that's the thing that is though [TS]

  I in retrospect it's like so much of [TS]

  what actually got me jobs had absolutely [TS]

  nothing to do with liberal arts and [TS]

  everything to do with all the other shit [TS]

  i picked up and learning how to put up [TS]

  with bullshit [TS]

  well this is what I'm saying like there [TS]

  has been a there has been a college [TS]

  inflation to the point that I mean [TS]

  honestly Marlon there was a time there [TS]

  was time before world war two where [TS]

  we're a very small percentage of people [TS]

  went to college and the GI Bill i [TS]

  basically it's it's basically the Jews [TS]

  but stop you right there [TS]

  no way no way i am on a roll [TS]