Roderick on the Line

Ep. 177: "When Fleece Became Flannel"


  this episode of Roderick on the line is [TS]

  sponsored by cards against humanity this [TS]

  month they invited sincere engineer to [TS]

  help me say hi to john [TS]

  Roger I gotta lie [TS]

  hello [TS]

  I John mm-hmm [TS]

  hi Merlin how's it going it's going well [TS]

  it's going well [TS]

  sounds good sounds good you sound like a [TS]

  man restored [TS]

  it's pouring down rain here and has been [TS]

  for days and that is very good you know [TS]

  it's really thats whatever but you know [TS]

  what's really interesting is it's [TS]

  raining here a ho [TS]

  yeah when it rains the San Francisco man [TS]

  that's a smart that's far that everybody [TS]

  is gonna smell haha [TS]

  it washes washes them all down into the [TS]

  sea does one day a real rain is gonna [TS]

  come here at this time of year when the [TS]

  rain comes the cold also coming in the [TS]

  rain and the cold arrive together and it [TS]

  scares the living daylights out of all [TS]

  the people who arrived at any point in [TS]

  the last nine months I don't become [TS]

  suddenly yeah and all the people that [TS]

  are like I moved there in march and [TS]

  seattle's amazing [TS]

  yeah and they just they spent the whole [TS]

  summer thinking that Seattle was amazing [TS]

  and then the cold icy death grip hand of [TS]

  winter arrives just arrives wanna get [TS]

  soda pig in a poke me an enemy that [TS]

  having Tallahassee they brought me there [TS]

  like all come we want you to get this [TS]

  job in Tallahassee come visit and as it [TS]

  turned out they brought me there in the [TS]

  midst of a festival called springtime [TS]

  tallahassee and is the one week a year [TS]

  when it's really nice and tallahassee up [TS]

  exactly right [TS]

  you go you go you go in there stairs and [TS]

  flowers and you know children are making [TS]

  daisy chains and running around the [TS]

  Maypole and then like a week later it's [TS]

  like 95 degrees right and 95 degrees and [TS]

  and and the like the witches are [TS]

  building little stick figures out in the [TS]

  for the swamps right they start early [TS]

  their Halloween starts earlier every [TS]

  year John it's already starting 2016 [TS]

  Helen so that's already in stores as i [TS]

  was driving in as i was driving in a you [TS]

  know I went past the methadone clinic [TS]

  and everybody there is running for cover [TS]

  and then all the people [TS]

  that have built camps like all the camps [TS]

  in the in the medians and up and kind of [TS]

  under the freeway and stuff you can just [TS]

  see the blue tarps come out and people [TS]

  are like holy shit [TS]

  ah my tent weeks that's sucks [TS]

  oh my god it sucks to be wet it's brutal [TS]

  and and then all of the Amazon all the [TS]

  like young guys in the j.crew suits and [TS]

  all the tight jeans people and all the [TS]

  Macklemore haircut people who are making [TS]

  a hundred eighty thousand dollars a year [TS]

  are like no amount of thousands of [TS]

  dollars a year can compensate me for [TS]

  this feeling which is that my bones are [TS]

  cold [TS]

  uh-huh and and then I go me haha [TS]

  because my bones have no feelings oh is [TS]

  that right not at all you seem like a [TS]

  man's bones would have maybe even [TS]

  sensitivity sometimes yeah maybe you're [TS]

  right i know probably not find that [TS]

  funny should bring this up because this [TS]

  is actually this is not by topic for the [TS]

  show but my lady and I are both actively [TS]

  looking for new of rain gear [TS]

  oh yeah I got a marmot jacket to [TS]

  replacement old marmot jacket and I told [TS]

  you this a few weeks ago and it looks [TS]

  it's virtually identical to the marmot [TS]

  jacket I've been wearing forever [TS]

  it's got one critical piece missing [TS]

  which is does not have the front outside [TS]

  pocket into which one could put and I [TS]

  thought oh what is why did they take [TS]

  that way you know i'm guessing cost [TS]

  yeah but you know that that's a shame [TS]

  but like in Russia as this is super [TS]

  interesting [TS]

  she's looking also first ring here it's [TS]

  like to be warm so now I've taken upon [TS]

  myself as a good husband to try and find [TS]

  her some some cure that will be warm now [TS]

  filson the filson where that's a [TS]

  commitment when you get filson you're [TS]

  getting the whole lifestyle right i [TS]

  don't own a single fill something right [TS]

  now [TS]

  yeah but thing about Phil's and stuff [TS]

  let's be honest film stuff is a [TS]

  commitment to being wet it's not it is [TS]

  like buying hip-waders right you want [TS]

  you want like you real now you're gonna [TS]

  find someplace where you could really [TS]

  get in the water [TS]

  yeah but you're gonna be I mean it's wax [TS]

  cotton and wool it's the old style of [TS]

  dealing with the rain which is like i am [TS]

  going to be [TS]

  wet in the rain and I'm gonna be smelly [TS]

  in the rain but i'm not going to die [TS]

  like a sheepdog [TS]

  yeah i'm not going to die in the rain [TS]

  because i have this somewhat like [TS]

  impenetrable material on but i am not [TS]

  i'm not trying to do this like Healy [TS]

  handsome thing where I step out of my [TS]

  rain gear and I'm just dry and it's a [TS]

  it's much more of a like I'm going to [TS]

  live in the in the rain [TS]

  that's interesting is my lady actually [TS]

  has a healing Hanson I think it's a [TS]

  yachting I'm you can't use the word [TS]

  yachting without sounding like an [TS]

  asshole but I it's down to like I think [TS]

  it actually has like a little bored hole [TS]

  we can put a rope through and stuff yeah [TS]

  sure [TS]

  and that boy is that ever you can just [TS]

  shoot water that thing all day long as [TS]

  laugh at you [TS]

  so here it's so all of the Alaskan [TS]

  fisherman they before they go up to [TS]

  their new season they all go around and [TS]

  they get a new season's worth of healy [TS]

  Hanson stuff and it's like a suit you [TS]

  know and it's impervious it's truly I [TS]

  mean if Alaska fishermen choose it then [TS]

  you can be guaranteed that there isn't a [TS]

  better thing maybe we should fill in [TS]

  some blanks for people who are in places [TS]

  that have rain but we're talking about [TS]

  it sounds seems to me like we're talking [TS]

  about a distinction with Wilson you've [TS]

  got some old-world technologies in [TS]

  please try some some basically medieval [TS]

  starways of waxing a sheep or something [TS]

  so you can put it on [TS]

  whereas in the other camp over here [TS]

  interesting with my right hand you've [TS]

  got more of what I will call technicals [TS]

  you've got things like you've got modern [TS]

  modern fabrics modern materials and [TS]

  methods to have a light maybe it's not [TS]

  working [TS]

  it might have working that's right [TS]

  working isn't a big part of having [TS]

  technical is working well you know [TS]

  wicking that's it then you get into your [TS]

  polypropylenes I feel like there are the [TS]

  people who say who so so it's a as your [TS]

  as the lightness of the fabric the light [TS]

  not just light-colored but like light [TS]

  could like the less you feel the garment [TS]

  be made it maybe it's waterproofness is [TS]

  there but its hardiness goes away so [TS]

  like when I [TS]

  in seattle in the northwest if you see a [TS]

  alignment up on a phone pole in the dead [TS]

  of winter changing some transformer [TS]

  uh-huh in Seattle [TS]

  there's a very good chance he's gonna be [TS]

  wearing filson because it's not just [TS]

  that he wants to be protected against [TS]

  the elements but he's also doing hard [TS]

  work up a phone pole in the window right [TS]

  it's like almost like I was I've been a [TS]

  fan of the carhartt product line in the [TS]

  past that like those like a logging [TS]

  pants those pants with like that the [TS]

  extra me and I'm like you can't kill [TS]

  those things you can climb up all day [TS]

  long it would make a scratch and and [TS]

  feels the same except that except the [TS]

  car it's like the carhartt pants was [TS]

  then additionally dipped in hot wax and [TS]

  allow to cool and really appealing he [TS]

  had some amazing it's amazing when you [TS]

  see lineman in them you realize like oh [TS]

  this is a guy who could pick any he [TS]

  needs his clothes to be like a like a [TS]

  suit of armor another it's another tool [TS]

  yeah and it's these are not expensive [TS]

  items but are not inexpensive items but [TS]

  he has chosen them because it's [TS]

  necessary and and Healy Hanson it's not [TS]

  something you would want to ski in right [TS]

  it's not something that you would want a [TS]

  mountain bike in or or do any kind of [TS]

  like we kind of things it's stuff that I [TS]

  mean when you are honored on a fishing [TS]

  boat in Alaska the weather becomes the [TS]

  weather becomes sentient it is [TS]

  absolutely trying to kill you it is [TS]

  trying to it is trying to drown you on [TS]

  your feet like as you stand the weather [TS]

  is trying to cause you to suffocate in [TS]

  water business and so the Healey Hanson [TS]

  stuff is for that and and also your [TS]

  you're like pulling monsters out of an [TS]

  iron Gracie which is only not frozen [TS]

  because its ocean it's too mad to be [TS]

  frozen [TS]

  you're pulling monsters out of the [TS]

  depths of this and killing them with [TS]

  hooks and so that's so it's a different [TS]

  kind of gear then if you're like [TS]

  snowboarding right right and so as you [TS]

  get up but if you're snowboarding you [TS]

  don't want to be covered with all this [TS]

  weird [TS]

  like bulletproof fabric you just kind of [TS]

  want to stay warm and dry [TS]

  that's a series of trade off so it's a [TS]

  continuum like columbia sportswear [TS]

  company which is a company from up here [TS]

  that stuff will keep you warm and dry [TS]

  I'm looking at one right now that looks [TS]

  like it's right in my wheelhouse and [TS]

  this is the looking at the columbia is [TS]

  this jacket but the thing is it's it's [TS]

  it's very wide purporting to this review [TS]

  on the site i enjoy cool tools they say [TS]

  that it is it's good it's very warm but [TS]

  like you can even wear for too long as [TS]

  you can so warm and look it's very good [TS]

  at repelling water and it's got a hood [TS]

  but you really look like you work at [TS]

  uber yeah you know that look [TS]

  oh yeah I do and and that's the that is [TS]

  the modern trade off now in the old days [TS]

  eddie bauer was the was the company that [TS]

  made stuff that was like it was burly [TS]

  enough but also you could you could wear [TS]

  it in town [TS]

  uh-huh or you know you could wear it up [TS]

  on the mountain you can wear it in town [TS]

  you didn't look like a dork but eddie [TS]

  bauer went any powers went the wrong way [TS]

  they sold their soul to the man and then [TS]

  everything like the the other day we [TS]

  were trying i was driving with the [TS]

  friend who's in town it was Halloween [TS]

  and we a couple of people are trying to [TS]

  get across the street you know we in the [TS]

  northwest if somebody stands on the edge [TS]

  of the sidewalk and looks at you you are [TS]

  obligated to stop and let them cross the [TS]

  street that is this the cultural norm [TS]

  here and may even be the law although [TS]

  the cops never stopped for you you stand [TS]

  on the sidewalk and stare right at them [TS]

  and they'll just look at look straight [TS]

  ahead and keep driving shark eyes but [TS]

  the rest of us are expected to stop for [TS]

  our fellow citizens and these two you [TS]

  know they're probably early sixties [TS]

  they're both wearing Outdoor Research [TS]

  hats which are kind of a strange hybrid [TS]

  of like an Australian bush hat except [TS]

  it's made out of cortex and it has it [TS]

  has strings you know it's like a chin [TS]

  rope sure i caii thought that a dad hat [TS]

  it's a little bit of a dad [TS]

  but but but mom and dad are both wearing [TS]

  these hats and they're wearing the [TS]

  requisite like purple fleece some cortex [TS]

  some you know the like cargo pants by a [TS]

  company called cool which is K uhl cool [TS]

  with them i think there's even a whom [TS]

  lot in there where their logo has a [TS]

  mountain in the background [TS]

  enough already and and they've got some [TS]

  kind of Solomon adventure shoe and just [TS]

  making up words no no and I'm and I'm [TS]

  looking at across the street tonight and [TS]

  i turn my but my lady friend and I'm [TS]

  like is that a halloween costume [TS]

  I mean they are so Northwest I'm coming [TS]

  as everyone in the Pacific Northwest [TS]

  yeah it's like it's it's ludicrous the [TS]

  only thing they need right now our ski [TS]

  poles that they're using to go on a [TS]

  brisk walk right maybe like carrying [TS]

  carrying a coffee a locally sourced [TS]

  coffee and riding a hoverboard [TS]

  mm that's the those who haven't yet you [TS]

  can hover boards around now that's the [TS]

  young people think these these people [TS]

  are like they are ready to go up Mount [TS]

  Baker right now except they're not [TS]

  anywhere near Mount Baker City replay [TS]

  people look like you could its you could [TS]

  i've also many it's difficult to tell [TS]

  are they going out for half and half are [TS]

  they on their way to climb Mount Tam or [TS]

  are potentially going to a wine tasting [TS]

  that's where there's a certain kind of [TS]

  fleece upscale fleece that people wear [TS]

  to all of those things [TS]

  yeah and-and-and for me the moment that [TS]

  the moment that like fleece became [TS]

  flannel right when police became flannel [TS]

  there was a there was a sea change in [TS]

  all of our lives like there was flannel [TS]

  for long long time and you know flannel [TS]

  and like moleskine and then there was [TS]

  police and once there was police certain [TS]

  certain large segment of the population [TS]

  up here just never thought about clothes [TS]

  again [TS]

  and interesting yes [TS]

  yeah you know it's funny uh-uh I don't [TS]

  know I'm again that we always get the [TS]

  word wrong is it inertia but there's [TS]

  something happened something comes along [TS]

  and there's different trends and all the [TS]

  sudden there's a thing there goes oh [TS]

  yeah that's for me the boot boot came [TS]

  along and suddenly like I guess every [TS]

  young woman who want to look like she [TS]

  just woke up I was wearing boots in [TS]

  boosting your yoga pants and put the [TS]

  other pants [TS]

  I mean yoga pants yoga pants look I'm [TS]

  pro yoga pants don't get me yeah well [TS]

  you know you never know when you just [TS]

  might need to do some yoga sure it goes [TS]

  somewhere maybe you got a hot Sam you go [TS]

  to an orange julius uh-huh well the [TS]

  thing about yoga pants like that [TS]

  somewhere along the line the technology [TS]

  of pants changed so that they were they [TS]

  were but lifting pants have wondered [TS]

  about that it has a brassiere like [TS]

  quality yes yes and then I what I [TS]

  accomplished that if I were you up and I [TS]

  don't know I honestly don't know i think [TS]

  if i put on yoga pants that it would be [TS]

  bad it would be bad luck to see you in [TS]

  yoga pants but there was there was a [TS]

  time when I was when I was in my teens [TS]

  even where there were not that many [TS]

  pants that made your butt look good it [TS]

  was and you have to have a certain kind [TS]

  of but you use definitely to certain [TS]

  kind of but you're right there didn't [TS]

  used to be used to be you could have [TS]

  like formal so you can have a formal [TS]

  slack [TS]

  mmm you can have whatever looks good no [TS]

  no you couldn't know absolutely no no [TS]

  absolutely not that's why you got to [TS]

  have the flap that goes over the back [TS]

  with events that's right ok i'm using [TS]

  basically every closed word that I know [TS]

  at this point and then you got you got [TS]

  your doctor stockies you know maybe with [TS]

  the pleated front of I know your family [TS]

  pleaded from even before dockers existed [TS]

  right i mean i'm thinking about nineteen [TS]

  eighty-four whatever if you wanted to [TS]

  grab your butt look good [TS]

  what did you do I mean you could wear [TS]

  Levi's if you have Levi's but but not [TS]

  everybody has a Levi's but oh no oh no I [TS]

  think jonathan richman his whole song [TS]

  about this [TS]

  oh well I mean it's about genes but i [TS]

  think by extension it's about butts is [TS]

  that you know we don't all have the kind [TS]

  of but that one would want to show off [TS]

  and i think a Levi's style pants [TS]

  generally is a little bit more hanging [TS]

  we're talking at this point 84 you're [TS]

  really talking about the the twilight of [TS]

  the Jordache and take over the [TS]

  Vanderbilt gloria vanderbilt years [TS]

  yeah sure live live in Britannia all [TS]

  that stuff is about some high-waisted [TS]

  jeans talking about a high waisted jean [TS]

  it's a dark rinse and it's very but [TS]

  centric and I think we're seeing the [TS]

  twilight of the but pan at that point [TS]

  but I always felt like those highways to [TS]

  gloria vanderbilt jeans were like if [TS]

  you're if you have a pair but if your [TS]

  butt looks like a pair huh [TS]

  then something I'm sorry just to clarify [TS]

  because the audio single pair up i'm [TS]

  sorry/not pair PA ir going up there the [TS]

  bear fruit PE AR care if you're like [TS]

  adults chin you got like a little bit of [TS]

  up [TS]

  yeah yeah okay right now I mean that if [TS]

  it looks like a Bartlett pear let's say [TS]

  right Barlow pair then you can wear [TS]

  gloria vanderbilt jeans you look [TS]

  fantastic little blue pair huh a denim [TS]

  pair right one who doesn't want that but [TS]

  if you have any kind of lumpy butt or [TS]

  square but or whatever maybe get a plum [TS]

  but or like a plum but now you can buy [TS]

  you might have some kind of a [TS]

  little-little who is a melon I don't [TS]

  mean in the sense of like you know you [TS]

  no pickup truck sighs I'm talking about [TS]

  more like you've just gotta like a [TS]

  misshapen cantaloupe [TS]

  yeah regularly and with bumps and lumps [TS]

  and stuff for your god I mean you don't [TS]

  want your butt to look like it's in a [TS]

  bag right so but then then one day and [TS]

  that would happen in the late nineties [TS]

  be seven for all mankind jeans arrived [TS]

  which had some crazy technology which [TS]

  are was all constructed in denim they [TS]

  didn't there wasn't any it's not like [TS]

  there was a wire underpinning but all of [TS]

  a sudden seven for all mankind jeans [TS]

  arrived and everyone could wear our [TS]

  mentor i'm talking about women now [TS]

  everyone could wear them and they look [TS]

  great on everybody was just like what [TS]

  happened why didn't we know how to do [TS]

  this before they just ran their sewing [TS]

  machines through this denim in a [TS]

  slightly different way and now that they [TS]

  look amazing on everything that's insane [TS]

  it's like how he discovered flat iron [TS]

  steak you start you can start cutting [TS]

  the steer a different angle you get a [TS]

  Dutch angle [TS]

  and then you're able to find an entire [TS]

  state nobody ever discovered before your [TS]

  I've never heard of seven for all [TS]

  mankind i'm looking at it now you're [TS]

  telling me they came up with some kind [TS]

  of technology that will enable you to [TS]

  depending on a bias you're doing some [TS]

  kind of verticality the kids a special [TS]

  lift and gravitas [TS]

  let's that's right that's right and then [TS]

  yoga pants came out employing what i can [TS]

  only imagine is the same technology [TS]

  except in like stretchy sweat pants [TS]

  material that then they I'm sure do [TS]

  wicking they will play with the shit out [TS]

  of you [TS]

  I guess their primary performance [TS]

  characteristic probably waking and yoga [TS]

  pants look amazing on everybody and all [TS]

  of a sudden it just made me feel like [TS]

  all of all in all through my teen years [TS]

  and twenties we didn't have this [TS]

  technology and now we do and I think the [TS]

  world has been improved huh [TS]

  okay less less less stress even if [TS]

  you're not wearing it all the time you [TS]

  know it's out there it's like well says [TS]

  and so today I that's where is that I [TS]

  didn't it didn't take it took me a [TS]

  second [TS]

  oh yes just exactly like ninjas I walked [TS]

  out of the house today i'm wearing [TS]

  skinny jeans i'm a man in middle age [TS]

  wearing these skinny jeans that are [TS]

  basically leggings let's let's call a [TS]

  spade a spade [TS]

  i I just it's just like a cut the [TS]

  stirrups off the bottom of Paris stirrup [TS]

  pants and I'm walking around in them and [TS]

  and I presume I look cool and I think [TS]

  everybody agrees they look very cool [TS]

  this is not this is not a thing that [TS]

  would have been possible before [TS]

  yeah right it's a kind of it's a kind of [TS]

  technology that I have hardly embraced [TS]

  can't believe how different genes can [TS]

  feel your pants really just pants in [TS]

  general and because first of all I mean [TS]

  is this basic problem of my gosh where [TS]

  to begin but there's a whole problem of [TS]

  when you're doing a lot of like you know [TS]

  when you've got children making pants in [TS]

  Asia is going to be some variations so [TS]

  like I learned a long time ago you [TS]

  should actually try on a couple [TS]

  different pairs even if it's just jeans [TS]

  wow I've never done that that's it's not [TS]

  a bad idea I've had some lady friends [TS]

  that would never consider just certainly [TS]

  not just buying them off the rack you [TS]

  try them on your mattress several pairs [TS]

  line but the less expensive fancier [TS]

  clothes get the more likely are they are [TS]

  to be like well made and consistently [TS]

  made and to be true to size but let go [TS]

  go look [TS]

  sighs your pants now and not those pants [TS]

  but your other pants you look at your [TS]

  501 we talked about this [TS]

  it might be hom Mexico it might be a cho [TS]

  and in China you there's all kinds of [TS]

  places where the HR jeans at this point [TS]

  hmm you know and so the thing is you try [TS]

  that on and the variations i mean i can [TS]

  get pretty sloppy you can get you can [TS]

  get some serious fruit but without even [TS]

  intending well yeah I made a decision [TS]

  not very long ago that i did not want to [TS]

  buy anything anymore that was a cho in [TS]

  China [TS]

  Wow and it wasn't because i'm against [TS]

  China it was just a decision that i [TS]

  needed to i needed to just set some [TS]

  limits on things right you need you need [TS]

  to you need to define the space and [TS]

  friends want to make these big sweeping [TS]

  changes but like you can actually be [TS]

  very profound to make a change even as [TS]

  small as nature in China [TS]

  yeah you just youyou you you defense off [TS]

  the garden to keep the deer out and so [TS]

  for me it was just like there's a lot of [TS]

  stuff being made in China right now and [TS]

  so if I just decide not to buy any of it [TS]

  that protects me from too much just that [TS]

  I mean it it it makes the first decision [TS]

  for me it's already made nothing made in [TS]

  china so thing shows up I look at it is [TS]

  made in china no thank you [TS]

  and it's just a way of sorting and then [TS]

  and then I had to make some decisions [TS]

  right because there's a lot of stuff [TS]

  that says made in Hong Kong or made in [TS]

  Macau uh-huh [TS]

  now would you say that those were made [TS]

  in China have to have to google it [TS]

  are those are or no so what about the [TS]

  one with the PRC or you got isn't there [TS]

  to get the People's Republic oh you're [TS]

  talk about Taiwan is that I want and [TS]

  then you could have done that is that [TS]

  technically part of China well and I [TS]

  mean depending on who you ask if you ask [TS]

  someone in china right they're going to [TS]

  say that Taiwan is part of China but if [TS]

  you have someone in taiwan they're going [TS]

  to say no right no one is not part of [TS]

  China it is its own but it's not exactly [TS]

  the kind of thing that factor in your [TS]

  decision you're scratching your head [TS]

  wondering where this is HL well the [TS]

  thing is I feel like it [TS]

  in in my in my sort of worldview right i [TS]

  support taiwan because they have decided [TS]

  that they're not part of China and I [TS]

  support them [TS]

  china deciding that Taiwan is still part [TS]

  of China if they just are currently [TS]

  administered by a by a rogue government [TS]

  I don't support that because you simply [TS]

  because i think China is big enough and [TS]

  Taiwan can be its own thing it should be [TS]

  its own thing it's something I in fact I [TS]

  have a good friend whose families from [TS]

  taiwan and he is feel strongly about it [TS]

  and so I support my friend now [TS]

  Macau and Hong Kong both were their own [TS]

  colonies right hong kong was a colony of [TS]

  the United Kingdom and Macau is a colony [TS]

  of Portugal and they were like they were [TS]

  like city city states where they you [TS]

  know I think macau was big in the opium [TS]

  trade and you know gambling they were [TS]

  like sin city's hong kong was more of an [TS]

  administrative city after a while the [TS]

  brits used it to administer their [TS]

  long-term far-flung Empire huh [TS]

  but then times changed and in in the [TS]

  late nineties are the whenever's the [TS]

  nineties both of those things so this is [TS]

  what's crazy to me they were basically [TS]

  least like it's one of those 99-year [TS]

  leases where you sign a 99-year lease [TS]

  and you're like when I'm gonna be dead [TS]

  before this lease expires [TS]

  what is what even is a 99-year lease [TS]

  well that's one of those things like a [TS]

  Steve Jobs a dollar a year that kind of [TS]

  thing [TS]

  well i got i know a guy here i used to [TS]

  live in a building like an old warehouse [TS]

  here where the guy who owned it didn't [TS]

  really own it he had a 99-year lease and [TS]

  he was he was saving area I mean he was [TS]

  he fixed up the building just enough [TS]

  that it could inhabit people and then it [TS]

  was just like a rent generator for him [TS]

  he couldn't I don't think we develop the [TS]

  property and he could maybe subs [TS]

  LOL his lease i'm not really sure 99 [TS]

  year lease I mean he's going to be dead [TS]

  long time before that but he has this [TS]

  99-year lease on the thing so anyway the [TS]

  Great Britain and Portugal had these [TS]

  leases of these cities and one day they [TS]

  came up they come came up in China was [TS]

  like we don't renew your lease or [TS]

  whatever and the last vestige of that [TS]

  brand of colonialism and so both cities [TS]

  hong kong and macau returned to the [TS]

  return to China and they're like a [TS]

  special administration area one of those [TS]

  things so you pick up a shirt and it [TS]

  says made in Macau and you go out at [TS]

  least it's not made in china and then [TS]

  you go wait a minute that's just that [TS]

  some label trickery [TS]

  uh huh yeah you look at your phone and [TS]

  it will say you know so worried like an [TS]

  apple devices will frequently say [TS]

  something like designing California [TS]

  movie babilona yeah kinda made a stoner [TS]

  assembled assembled in austin mhm [TS]

  assembled in austin i don't know why but [TS]

  they they used to say it used to say you [TS]

  know everything you tell it's made in [TS]

  America thinking well it's but there's [TS]

  real switcheroo because there's some [TS]

  parts that come from here and there gets [TS]

  made in china and then it comes back [TS]

  here and I don't think they polish it [TS]

  here or something to put in the box i'm [TS]

  not sure [TS]

  yeah it's funny when you buy when you [TS]

  buy i just got my lady and I felt for [TS]

  her birthday and you'll see it's when it [TS]

  ships out of shells n so it's called the [TS]

  segment goes to Hong Kong and then make [TS]

  the big jump to ontario california but [TS]

  yeah you'll see that it's coming is [TS]

  coming right out of China [TS]

  I don't know what's amazing i think [TS]

  about Hong Kong and Macau is that they [TS]

  both are they both somehow have kept one [TS]

  foot in the capitalist world cow was [TS]

  Blake's they still gamble there it's [TS]

  like a James Bond town everything is a [TS]

  popular pastime in my neighborhood [TS]

  oh right the plan mahjongg there's [TS]

  mahjong there's mahjong fronts and there [TS]

  are places that are nominally you know [TS]

  bodega style convenience type stores [TS]

  that's basically it's just six [TS]

  elderly Chinese guys staring at Aquino [TS]

  screen when you say when you say mahjong [TS]

  front do you mean like people get a new [TS]

  set of teeth but they're made out of [TS]

  mahjong tiles [TS]

  yes it's not a chinese bridge not to be [TS]

  confused with contract bridge [TS]

  according to Hoyle now just totally [TS]

  different thing now [TS]

  no but that's a that's a I think [TS]

  gambling i think gambling is a big [TS]

  cultural thing in am I I can't say that [TS]

  for all of China China's a very big [TS]

  country but there are a lot of Chinese [TS]

  old especially older chinese guys and my [TS]

  neighborhood really are any camera and [TS]

  the young folks do they play a lot of [TS]

  cards if I just cards on the street all [TS]

  the time [TS]

  I mean this might be happening in other [TS]

  neighborhoods I can only speak from my [TS]

  own but so I don't know anything about [TS]

  macau I don't think I know anything [TS]

  about the cow [TS]

  yeah yeah watching that documentary [TS]

  about the Indonesian genocide I think [TS]

  they were a Portuguese what Protectorate [TS]

  colony calling all the colony [TS]

  yeah account look at that yeah you know [TS]

  the Portuguese had a strange man strange [TS]

  little Empire they were big ship people [TS]

  right [TS]

  they had a lot of ships yeah my [TS]

  experience in Portugal which is I mean [TS]

  not the world's most extensive [TS]

  experience but I've spent a good goodly [TS]

  amount of time in Portugal more than I [TS]

  ever expected I would do and you know [TS]

  the I think the tendency for us here in [TS]

  the United States is to think that [TS]

  Portugal is I don't know some flange of [TS]

  Spain yes like it's like spain jr but [TS]

  when you get to Portugal you realize [TS]

  that they really are different from the [TS]

  Spanish they look different they act [TS]

  different they are they are different [TS]

  and it's because they like hug this wild [TS]

  Atlantic coast and they just look [TS]

  they're more rugged mm-hmm [TS]

  and what if you ever want to know [TS]

  there's a difference just ask a [TS]

  Portuguese person who I'll see that's [TS]

  the thing if you ask a Spanish person [TS]

  they're going to say that there's no [TS]

  difference but if you ask a Portuguese [TS]

  person it's kind of like Portugal is the [TS]

  taiwan of of Spain cowboy and well you [TS]

  know in Rhode Island where my ladies [TS]

  from there are a lot of Portuguese [TS]

  people and I mean it really confuses the [TS]

  culture that's where they're very i hope [TS]

  this isn't too ping pong but they're [TS]

  very they're garrulous like very [TS]

  outgoing are very emotional people and [TS]

  it's [TS]

  it's kind of a fun vibe yeah wait for [TS]

  these food and I'm not so crazy they [TS]

  don't want a greasy fish there [TS]

  yeah and it's sort of like the Basques [TS]

  the Basque love a greasy fish it because [TS]

  it keeps their keep their pelts really [TS]

  soft anything told knows that that's [TS]

  that's good right [TS]

  I just recently met a person of Basque [TS]

  extraction and it caused me to think [TS]

  about you know a new friend and they [TS]

  caused me to [TS]

  I've also spent some time in basque [TS]

  country and i and i love it there and [TS]

  but i but then i was like wait a minute [TS]

  what the Basques do in World War two [TS]

  I have a pretty good sense of what [TS]

  everybody did during World War Two and I [TS]

  I treat people from European countries [TS]

  differently based on what my [TS]

  preconceived notion of what their [TS]

  grandfather did in World War two is [TS]

  right i kind of like oh hello nice to [TS]

  meet you [TS]

  I know what your grandfather did in [TS]

  World War two don't try and Buffalo me [TS]

  mr. i know what your grand like a [TS]

  terrible or movie had fun with work to [TS]

  you know it's one of those things where [TS]

  it's like you go into somebody's house [TS]

  and that you know what what people's [TS]

  grandfather's in Bavaria did in World [TS]

  War two is very different than what [TS]

  people grandfather's in the amber too [TS]

  much so much to say about this i'm [TS]

  looking at the page about Basque so [TS]

  baskets kinda like it's a little bit [TS]

  Spain little bit France little bit [TS]

  country little bit rock and roll yet so [TS]

  that it goes up into France it goes down [TS]

  into Spain and there you know and they [TS]

  kind of consider themselves as sort of a [TS]

  single tribe except you know the French [TS]

  Basques obviously her i'll say gracious [TS]

  loyal it was a Basque that's exactly [TS]

  right and he founded the Jesuits so the [TS]

  Basques you know very separate group of [TS]

  people their languages is to linguists [TS]

  it has no like analog in any other [TS]

  language in the world it is not an [TS]

  indo-european language it is a cookie [TS]

  why language that someone one day [TS]

  invented who lived up in the in the [TS]

  crazy Hills in northern Spain and I no [TS]

  one knows where it came from and no one [TS]

  it it doesn't behave like other [TS]

  languages [TS]

  it's a little bit you know it has it's [TS]

  one of those things where it's like [TS]

  well finish there's some there's some [TS]

  crazy aspect of finish like her go [TS]

  Hungarian languages which are similar to [TS]

  Japanese and really and nobody can [TS]

  understand how that's one reason I find [TS]

  Portuguese so interesting that up uh [TS]

  ruin my roommate for a while and [TS]

  military school was from portugal and [TS]

  when he would speak you know you hear on [TS]

  the phone talking to his family and he [TS]

  never spoke it you know there weren't a [TS]

  lot of Portuguese kids there but one out [TS]

  here I always said was so strange [TS]

  because it sounded to my twelve-year-old [TS]

  here [TS]

  it sounded almost exactly like a cross [TS]

  between spanish and german it had a lot [TS]

  of that group of the glottal kind of you [TS]

  know gotta roll filled up German but [TS]

  also the kind of like that little thing [TS]

  romance feel of spanish i feel like the [TS]

  gutter reality of Portuguese developed [TS]

  because they were shouting at each other [TS]

  across the deck of a ship that was in a [TS]

  storm [TS]

  I said that you know that i think they [TS]

  call it an adaptation with no answer key [TS]

  so call evolution [TS]

  Yeah right right right right yes because [TS]

  if you just if you you're not gonna be [TS]

  up there you know you know this is why [TS]

  the Italians never c never sailed is [TS]

  because it was too hard for them to yell [TS]

  over the wind it's not about selling a [TS]

  poem rights right that's why the [TS]

  Italians uh yeah they days whether it's [TS]

  like an unlocked [TS]

  they just stayed in Italy and they never [TS]

  got in boats because they didn't want it [TS]

  because their language which she was [TS]

  John about the you know what you know [TS]

  what it's shaped like a boat that shaped [TS]

  like a boot that's true i think that's a [TS]

  really good point but I but so the [TS]

  Basques that you know that their [TS]

  territory is very mountainous and if you [TS]

  were trying to invade and conquer those [TS]

  people you would fail which is why they [TS]

  did not they were not conquered they got [TS]

  two things go on their side they got a [TS]

  language were no it's like Stonehenge [TS]

  nobody knows where it came from and then [TS]

  you've also got the mountains united [TS]

  nations against any kind of a attack you [TS]

  can't get in can't get out and then when [TS]

  you get there it's hard to ask for [TS]

  directions because we like you know from [TS]

  here [TS]

  that's right you're not speaking the [TS]

  this and unintelligible language you can [TS]

  even learn it's like Navajo code talker [TS]

  you how many a pastor on united states [TS]

  well you know what i do i do know one [TS]

  thing about the Basques in the United [TS]

  States which is that they settled in [TS]

  idaho what the bellaire 57,000 793 [TS]

  according to wikipedia and but 193 well [TS]

  as we don't come [TS]

  but never like that accidentally [TS]

  somebody had to see where that came from [TS]

  I think that my friend who is a basket [TS]

  got in here unbeknownst to wikipedia and [TS]

  she doesn't she's not be encountered in [TS]

  that figure because she because there [TS]

  was an intermediary relationship where [TS]

  she lived in knowing John no one knows [TS]

  how to ask her [TS]

  probably well that's right what do you [TS]

  what do you say like I mean not [TS]

  everybody that comes into the country [TS]

  gets asked i I've gone through customs [TS]

  enough times to know that they don't ask [TS]

  if you're Basque well-known they might [TS]

  misunderstand think your last name is [TS]

  actually the city are from make a chalk [TS]

  mark on your tagged and put in [TS]

  quarantine I'll see exactly right and [TS]

  then all of a sudden you're walking [TS]

  around Corleone here but that's right [TS]

  that's right yeah so a but i'll but i [TS]

  love that part of the world and they eat [TS]

  a lot of greasy fish but that's [TS]

  delicious wonderful i did I used to [TS]

  think I was not a greasy fish guy but [TS]

  then i had had some sardines in other [TS]

  categories your bow [TS]

  yeah you know like like the the herring [TS]

  the herrings from the herring family and [TS]

  they're just laying out these gigantic [TS]

  Greece fish and like I hope you like [TS]

  these and I I was like Hello [TS]

  but then i am and i said i do like them [TS]

  I understand what you're doing up here [TS]

  in bilbao I get it now but that but what [TS]

  I didn't know was what their [TS]

  grandfathers did in World War two and so [TS]

  I started a little bit of i started [TS]

  rabbit holding as you do about Fresno no [TS]

  I rabbit hole about friends know this [TS]

  morning but I rabbit hold about the [TS]

  Basques in World War two the morning [TS]

  trying to figure out a fortune for [TS]

  carpenters gay [TS]

  what did you come up with I'm like maybe [TS]

  a third of the way in right it's one [TS]

  that's not super clear this and I feel [TS]

  like that's where I am with the Basques [TS]

  in world war two and a third of the way [TS]

  and okay i figured out you know because [TS]

  the thing is that there is that whole [TS]

  business right spain was we get the get [TS]

  the get the fascist right there just [TS]

  coming off the the big war in the [TS]

  thirties that's right but there [TS]

  ostensibly neutral in the war and a lot [TS]

  of Allied Pilots that got shot down over [TS]

  France did that the French underground [TS]

  would take them down hand them over to [TS]

  the Basques the Basques would get them [TS]

  across into Spain and then the [TS]

  neutrality of of Spain would allow those [TS]

  pilots to find their way back [TS]

  come even though the Spanish were pretty [TS]

  allied with the Nazis but there was [TS]

  enough of a you know they would they be [TS]

  maintained enough of a sort of like [TS]

  neutral posture that Allied Pilots could [TS]

  get over there and then I realized that [TS]

  neighboring the basque country is a is [TS]

  the hollandaise sauce County oh that [TS]

  Belgium know it's a burn burn bear you [TS]

  no bare knees are barren that's [TS]

  excellent [TS]

  well no it's it's this it's like the [TS]

  coming holidays is not from Dutch no [TS]

  that's what's amazing about its of me [TS]

  I'm branch that's and and that then this [TS]

  Bearnaise so I don't think the sauce is [TS]

  actually from Baron what about béchamel [TS]

  where's that from [TS]

  I'm sure they're all from France there [TS]

  there were no sausage before friends is [TS]

  that right [TS]

  there's all their idea before that [TS]

  people only had dry drying meets yeah it [TS]

  probably is probably boiled vegetables [TS]

  yeah they thought no thought of sauce [TS]

  they put it put everything in a pot [TS]

  boiled it through some salt and some [TS]

  dirt in that was one on Z and then the [TS]

  French were like what if we made an [TS]

  emulsification of mayonnaise and through [TS]

  like some tarragon in it and then the [TS]

  world was forever changed em but all [TS]

  those sauces i think i think they did [TS]

  they came from the north but they were [TS]

  called the they named it [TS]

  béarnaise because they don't know [TS]

  because it was they were doing somebody [TS]

  an honor right like oh you're from Baron [TS]

  we're going to name it béarnaise your [TS]

  name is sauce for you and there's a [TS]

  marshal of France but they're called the [TS]

  God sauces I stand corrected it's the [TS]

  mother sauces mother sauces sasa [TS]

  associate mommy air you've got the best [TS]

  email you got s spy spagnoli it's got it [TS]

  only ESP hele and I've ever heard that [TS]

  holidays to tomahto and veloute oh [TS]

  that's the mother sauces and so a new [TS]

  mommy Oh mommy I think that's the one on [TS]

  the back of the tongue that the Japanese [TS]

  discovered yeah we struggle at all with [TS]

  these distinctions with your daughter [TS]

  she characters my daughter is is really [TS]

  becoming a very profound cultural critic [TS]

  she has no idea what she's talking about [TS]

  your waiver of songs now no sauce is [TS]

  lots always challenging she must like a [TS]

  little bit of butter but not too much [TS]

  but when it comes to like she almost [TS]

  exactly always exactly gets japanese and [TS]

  chinese things confused she thinks anime [TS]

  is from China and she and she thinks [TS]

  that did you know the stuff we got from [TS]

  chinese restaurants Japanese oh IC uh [TS]

  the Marlins pretty I think she can hang [TS]

  with the fact that there are she's just [TS]

  learning about there being people from [TS]

  all around because she's grown up in a [TS]

  culture where there were kids of every [TS]

  kind of race ethnicity around her so she [TS]

  never she didn't understand that there [TS]

  was any difference between people just [TS]

  based on their color or she doesn't [TS]

  think that there is and but she does [TS]

  appreciate the people are speaking [TS]

  different languages right which he [TS]

  thinks is fascinating and she's just at [TS]

  the age where she's starting to kind of [TS]

  try and imitate them which you know what [TS]

  it's like [TS]

  well that's as do that are inside voice [TS]

  yeah that's fun that's fun to do but [TS]

  it's also an inside voice thing and the [TS]

  other day she was wearing she's wearing [TS]

  black pants and a black shirt and she [TS]

  was running around saying I'm a black [TS]

  girl I'm a black girl and it was like [TS]

  that's exactly what you are and yet [TS]

  that's not a thing that we can shout at [TS]

  the mall and so that you know we're [TS]

  right at the stage where I don't want to [TS]

  get into her little mind and start [TS]

  filling it with all of our adult human [TS]

  like anger and frustration and bullshit [TS]

  right now I totally that's part of the [TS]

  struggle [TS]

  yeah i think you mean alsace-lorraine I [TS]

  mean when we're in when we're in [TS]

  chinatown in their people speaking [TS]

  Chinese all around us and my [TS]

  four-year-old goes Jeong Jeong I go I I [TS]

  uh I don't want this I don't want to [TS]

  start right yet like stomping on your [TS]

  enthusiasm with our like intermediary [TS]

  problems you know I don't want to lean [TS]

  down and say say anything but I also [TS]

  don't want her to like you know the [TS]

  better their ninety-nine percent of the [TS]

  people in chinatown are going to give a [TS]

  shit and they're gonna think it's cute [TS]

  and funny but there's always gonna be [TS]

  somebody who has their up often since [TS]

  Apple it's on [TS]

  I did but it is also always fun to hear [TS]

  like if you asked anybody this is not [TS]

  something you would you would probably [TS]

  do it south by southwest or maybe you [TS]

  would do this XOXO but you can see that [TS]

  somebody like what is its what is a [TS]

  Vietnamese written language styling was [TS]

  German sound like or any of those you [TS]

  know you just imitate a Canadian person [TS]

  was fascinating though is to hear people [TS]

  in other countries doing what they think [TS]

  an American accent sounds like yeah and [TS]

  you realize like how how dominant uni [TS]

  and weird we sound well I've never told [TS]

  that story about the when i was at [TS]

  Gonzaga a good friend of mine had a [TS]

  roommate who was from Japan and who was [TS]

  learning English sort of in college and [TS]

  a bright guy na like a he was a great a [TS]

  great guy and ended up being a really [TS]

  good friend but when he first arrived he [TS]

  knew I think he knew more English than [TS]

  he was comfortable speaking but he did [TS]

  not really speak English and so after a [TS]

  while of a kind of hanging out and and [TS]

  introducing him to american beer and so [TS]

  forth [TS]

  one of us one of us said I think it was [TS]

  my friend Bob said when you are in japan [TS]

  and talking to Japanese friends how do [TS]

  you imitate Americans like what do [TS]

  Americans sound like and he was like [TS]

  what are you talking about was we had to [TS]

  explain like what it was and by way of [TS]

  explanation way we said you know when we [TS]

  imitate Japanese are like also chung [TS]

  talking or whatever right and he was he [TS]

  like you can see the light bulb go off [TS]

  and he was like all right I get it and [TS]

  he likes to do with his feet apart wide [TS]

  apart wide stance [TS]

  and he said I'm gonna bang bang bang [TS]

  bang and we were like oh and we all got [TS]

  really sad isn't exactly what you don't [TS]

  want to hear ya we slide back in our in [TS]

  our like Randy couches we're like a [TS]

  hamburger hamburger bang bang Chicago [TS]

  bank don't know that's the worst are we [TS]

  that bad [TS]

  oh no it's miserable uh ah so and I [TS]

  think that that's still true i think [TS]

  that in the majority of America the [TS]

  world were just hamburger hamburger bang [TS]

  bang [TS]

  I think you're probably right that you [TS]

  like 4s espagnole sauce [TS]

  oh my goodness i think this might be our [TS]

  our gravy so what happens in espagnole [TS]

  sauce [TS]

  alright let's look at this is all your [TS]

  ass but no way it's just look at this [TS]

  photo of of beef in this brown gravy [TS]

  with a side of like steak fries [TS]

  what am I doing here why am I sitting in [TS]

  this cold also sitting here looking at [TS]

  this [TS]

  your boys are freezing beef in brown [TS]

  gravy [TS]

  oh look at that went to importance last [TS]

  night oh good for you how to go went [TS]

  great i mean you know you go to morton's [TS]

  and and you basically like it's like [TS]

  you're stewing in Frank Sinatra right [TS]

  there's Frank Sinatra on the stereo and [TS]

  then they bring out a plate and it's [TS]

  basically like half of Frank Sinatra [TS]

  hosts fingers in my hair but it's an [TS]

  honor it's another Frank Sinatra he [TS]

  pissed on my fucking head and it wasn't [TS]

  on fucked my wife right on the bar you [TS]

  know that but should be frank yes I can [TS]

  if frank says I can sew in detail you [TS]

  want you had a big steak [TS]

  yeah a big stick it was good but you [TS]

  know i'm suffering a little bit of the [TS]

  consequences today because yeah [TS]

  basically I you know I hate a cat and [TS]

  now I'm i'm walking around it's like it [TS]

  was Halloween too and i haven't even [TS]

  eating sugar for a while and you know if [TS]

  you get anyone Eminem the cravings come [TS]

  back right and then you need to you need [TS]

  to go to the methadone clinic because [TS]

  just like oh my god I had some sugar and [TS]

  there's this giant bowl of reese's [TS]

  peanut butter cups and what can I did [TS]

  you know I'm trapped in the house all [TS]

  method for candy [TS]

  let's say hit rock bottom as a candy [TS]

  user like what do you think what kind of [TS]

  clinic would you go to what they give [TS]

  you [TS]

  splenda oh yeah i think they would just [TS]

  give you shitty candy they give you like [TS]

  licorice the but you know I i had an [TS]

  interesting conversation with my mom the [TS]

  other day where she said you used to it [TS]

  so you know you have to have talked [TS]

  about my shoebox full of money [TS]

  yeah but according to my mom i also had [TS]

  a giant bag of candy when people would [TS]

  want you know all the candy holidays [TS]

  which are kind of all the holidays [TS]

  except fourth of July they're all candy [TS]

  holidays and she said you would hoard [TS]

  your candy you wouldn't eat it and I was [TS]

  like that sounds like me she said but [TS]

  you would you kept this candy in a bag [TS]

  and you would bring neighborhood kids in [TS]

  you never take the candy bag out of the [TS]

  house you'd bring neighborhood kids in [TS]

  and you would give them a choice of [TS]

  their favorite candy out of the bag if [TS]

  they would blank like you would bribe [TS]

  and manipulate the neighborhood kids [TS]

  into doing what you wanted by promising [TS]

  them a selection from your candy horde [TS]

  and I was like what I sound I sound like [TS]

  a fucking diabolical monster child [TS]

  yeah you sound like a like a like a [TS]

  super billionaire and she was like [TS]

  that's right and so I have and so then [TS]

  it started to like memory started to [TS]

  flood back of my candy stash which was [TS]

  full of all the candy that I didn't [TS]

  actually person i mean i would eat all [TS]

  the fucking chocolate right away but [TS]

  then I had all the garbage candy the [TS]

  smarties and the licorice in that Mike [TS]

  and Ikes and all that stuff I didn't [TS]

  care about Necco wafers yeah like just [TS]

  shit candy that they give to people and [TS]

  I would just hoard it and then offer [TS]

  this offer these like beads two kids for [TS]

  their Manhattan islands [TS]

  oh yeah I shall require you to do a [TS]

  fancy dance for me [TS]

  that's right or like oh here's here's [TS]

  here nave here's the [TS]

  game here's the game today you are going [TS]

  to be a dog and i am going to be a dog [TS]

  killer and the kids would be like I [TS]

  don't want to be a dog again and I'd be [TS]

  like why don't you come in and have a [TS]

  Necco wafer and then maybe like okay and [TS]

  then be like that's right now [TS]

  now i'm going to sit on my throne and [TS]

  you sit here next to my throne and if [TS]

  anybody comes you attack so I that sub [TS]

  that makes me sound like a sicko from a [TS]

  young age that happened and then my mom [TS]

  confirmed that she thought I was a [TS]

  psycho that this was not a childlike [TS]

  behavior but she didn't somehow she [TS]

  didn't like getting a doctor or anything [TS]

  well not as far as i know not until [TS]

  later but you know I my daughter has [TS]

  what appears to be very little impulse [TS]

  control like when we go places where [TS]

  there's a buffet [TS]

  she just pieces in front of the buffet [TS]

  just trolling it hoping that someone [TS]

  will give her a shrimp you know and I'm [TS]

  like get away from the buffet you're [TS]

  freaking people out and she's like but [TS]

  all I could all the food and i'm like i [TS]

  see it you've already eaten enough food [TS]

  for 74 year olds today sheet a lot she [TS]

  just she did would never stop eating [TS]

  money if i put if I put a a trough of [TS]

  four-year-old kibble four-year-old child [TS]

  by purina right if I put it there in [TS]

  front of her room she would just you [TS]

  just forage all day she's fascinating my [TS]

  kid is not a big eater [TS]

  she's going straight she's a canon [TS]

  lawyer she's always looking for like [TS]

  what do I need to negotiate to get a [TS]

  little more TV a little bit more candy [TS]

  but she does not eat a lot of like [TS]

  normal food but your kindle elite like [TS]

  what kind of stuff like what if she had [TS]

  rather what she also just the just kid [TS]

  shit even macaroni Dogg hott Dogg's a [TS]

  grilled cheese sandwiches because school [TS]

  Betty she likes she likes something [TS]

  Betty White if my daughter you know we [TS]

  talked about i believe i've had this [TS]

  fantasy of somebody having a great [TS]

  machine in my house like I think if she [TS]

  could have you know some people have [TS]

  draft beer if she could have draft [TS]

  noodles [TS]

  I think she would just be pulling on [TS]

  glass noodles all the time I feel like I [TS]

  feel like that would be true of mine too [TS]

  and so but but she's trolling the buffet [TS]

  I don't know what she's looking for [TS]

  apes like what does she think is up [TS]

  there but she just want you know she's [TS]

  you know she gives the like the this [TS]

  poor street urchin eyeballs to all the [TS]

  adults walking by like no one has been [TS]

  using little look at the Kenzie and [TS]

  character gotta have more grills and and [TS]

  so people are like I mean I think we [TS]

  passed the point where any adult would [TS]

  feed a strange child from their hands [TS]

  right when they look around like where [TS]

  is this child's parent and why she [TS]

  trolling the buffet like so that's what [TS]

  I say to her like you're making people [TS]

  nervous [TS]

  come over here and sit with your family [TS]

  and she's just like as soon as soon as [TS]

  you're not watching her she's back over [TS]

  like like it like that sharks swimming [TS]

  in front of the a beach covered with [TS]

  bathers and I go I like what is that [TS]

  but she does not seem like somebody [TS]

  who's going to hoard candy in a bag in [TS]

  order to manipulate other kids and I [TS]

  can't tell whether that's an evolution [TS]

  of the family like a sort of John [TS]

  Syracuse's style and the way he looks at [TS]

  evolution right yeah just sort of like [TS]

  where people see a thing and then they [TS]

  they change the ball and evolve and [TS]

  evolution yes or whether it is where the [TS]

  weather it's a maladaptation and she's [TS]

  not going to be able to she's not going [TS]

  to learn how to leverage your your [TS]

  wealth into power over people who don't [TS]

  ask you talk too much about our bet you [TS]

  know that good kids are weird kids are [TS]

  super weird I it's hard to know what [TS]

  they're going to what they're going to [TS]

  connect with and like but the buffet i [TS]

  remember the buffet just being the stuff [TS]

  of fantasy to me when we got our first [TS]

  don't say Duff's and in Cincinnati was [TS]

  like three dollars me in like nineteen [TS]

  seventy six or seven dollars you it [TS]

  feels like it was three dollars for all [TS]

  all you was before they say all you care [TS]

  to eat they would say for [TS]

  all-you-can-eat buffet which really was [TS]

  more like some kind of a challenge oh [TS]

  yeah ours was called the royal fork and [TS]

  when you walked into the Royal for that [TS]

  sounds fancy it was it was it was there [TS]

  was a crown on top of the fork the Royal [TS]

  for you'd walk into the royal fork and [TS]

  you saw right away [TS]

  that there were like twenty four [TS]

  different kinds of jell-o salad and yeah [TS]

  all the macaroni and cheese you could [TS]

  eat all the chicken cutlets you could [TS]

  eat all the school Betty you could eat [TS]

  it wasn't it was an insane scene and [TS]

  then I can't imagine why the restaurant [TS]

  like that would go out of business but [TS]

  royal fork is no more i'm looking at [TS]

  some images here from a place that area [TS]

  became popular around the time I moved [TS]

  out of tallahassee but it's called china [TS]

  super buffet and there was this real [TS]

  trend in the mid to late night for [TS]

  example I think I told you the first [TS]

  time I ever ate sushi at least on a [TS]

  regular basis was at a buffet [TS]

  oh that's good sushi buffet sushi sigo [TS]

  you got lunch is eight dollars for [TS]

  all-you-can-eat sushi and a seminal role [TS]

  you know what's that Tom i Doan 27 [TS]

  Olympians eat their food and rolls I [TS]

  think that racism and white wife beating [TS]

  it but they uh but no but that's that [TS]

  was well there was this trend though in [TS]

  the mid to late nineties where there's [TS]

  like more and more buffets taking over [TS]

  and pushing out the more mom-and-pop [TS]

  version of whatever was coming there so [TS]

  when this place open you should see this [TS]

  place looks like a a barn it's just [TS]

  giant so they got all that i'm looking [TS]

  here at the steam tables full of like [TS]

  lots of you know vegetable heavy dishes [TS]

  with recent but they also have this [TS]

  entire bar of just uniformly [TS]

  golden-brown american food is always [TS]

  liked all-you-can-eat tater tots all you [TS]

  can eat french fries all ukita it's not [TS]

  going to publix you know when you go to [TS]

  that the hot section where it's like [TS]

  just all uniformly golden brown [TS]

  oh I know I know and people just would [TS]

  just go fucking crazy in this place I [TS]

  was behind a guy the salad bar last week [TS]

  and I I swear to god you do not want to [TS]

  see an old person in the salad bar they [TS]

  put a hurtin on a salad bar [TS]

  I think a lot for a lot of people to go [TS]

  the salad bar that's going to be three [TS]

  meals I've got a pal uh who insists that [TS]

  we go to sizzler not because the stakes [TS]

  are good but because the salad bar they [TS]

  got AI got hot bar [TS]

  yeah right you can go you two soups you [TS]

  get a variety of breads yep [TS]

  now you gotta pump chilly there today [TS]

  well the children maybe the chili is in [TS]

  a is in a [TS]

  serving tub because I don't sound like [TS]

  it like a like a fancy lad but sizzlers [TS]

  just a little bit of my bar [TS]

  yeah I keep saying this I can't even [TS]

  find ironically john and i want to [TS]

  change the cheese dad what did your did [TS]

  your tastebuds the stop in 1987 I mean [TS]

  they stopped evolving like sizzler [TS]

  no I can't go to sizzler but but she [TS]

  insists and we go to sister and my god I [TS]

  can't do this this is that they don't [TS]

  even have they don't even have steak in [TS]

  Malibu chicken anymore i couldn't even [TS]

  find a malibu chicken salad with chicken [TS]

  what I got in what you never had you [TS]

  never want to sizzler got steak in [TS]

  Malibu chicken think so sounds pretty [TS]

  good [TS]

  malibu chicken is basically just a [TS]

  chicken breast with the LA cheese on it [TS]

  slice a ham on it and then some Swiss [TS]

  cheese on the top [TS]

  oh it's like a poor man's that cordon [TS]

  bleu the poor man's quarter blue you get [TS]

  it get too used to get two breasts to [TS]

  Malibu chickens and anna and some kind [TS]

  of six ounce or eight ounce steak that [TS]

  that absolutely fell off the back of a [TS]

  truck right i mean it's like they say [TS]

  they don't say us a choice they say they [TS]

  say like choice takes a picture picture [TS]

  of a guy in government uniform shrugging [TS]

  if I'm right it's like choice takes [TS]

  that's that's different than saying that [TS]

  this steak is USDA choice probably fine [TS]

  it's just saying that you chose them [TS]

  how about ok like a laundry bin of [TS]

  states [TS]

  let's take him it came out of a out of a [TS]

  processing plant no no we don't mean [TS]

  USDA choice we just means we picked out [TS]

  for you mean scissors choice i don't [TS]

  think they might even be called sisters [TS]

  sisters choice that's as good as us atty [TS]

  a choice but yeah so I so the other day [TS]

  i was down i was being I was being [TS]

  basically like a guy press-ganged into [TS]

  going into a sizzler and I was standing [TS]

  out front like like digging my heels [TS]

  into the cement going no i do not want [TS]

  again to go to a sizzler i'm done and [TS]

  across the street from the sizzler is an [TS]

  Outback Steakhouse and I said let's just [TS]

  look look-look-look-look we're here [TS]

  let's just try something new you know me [TS]

  I like try something new [TS]

  let's just go across the street to the [TS]

  out [TS]

  back steakhouse will do a comparison [TS]

  it's consistent it is consistent and so [TS]

  we slept across the street to the to the [TS]

  outback steakhouse we go in and [TS]

  immediately were being upset [TS]

  also the bloomin onion we weren't even [TS]

  seated at the table this and sat there [TS]

  and just sort of you know got up sold [TS]

  half a dozen times the weight the waiter [TS]

  was pretty bad at his job but you know [TS]

  it was a better class of stake than the [TS]

  sizzler so i had to say you know okay [TS]

  you go to places like a ponderosa on [TS]

  your kid we didn't have those in [TS]

  Anchorage we didn't I don't even know [TS]

  what a golden corral is that sounds like [TS]

  a royal forward but that's not a real [TS]

  fucking golden corral i think is like [TS]

  that well here's the thing like when I [TS]

  was a kid he had your York steak house [TS]

  you never heard her well and they were [TS]

  places that did like a cafeteria-style [TS]

  line and you could get a six-dollar [TS]

  steak or whatever or whatever you can [TS]

  get you know that the ground beef patty [TS]

  burger with steak fries and you get a [TS]

  little just like you get the putting in [TS]

  the jello out of the case just like you [TS]

  know like you would any cafeteria [TS]

  it's just that would be you know it's [TS]

  like slightly nicer than disgusting and [TS]

  like you would go there but then I think [TS]

  something happened i want to say around [TS]

  the time i was in high school probably [TS]

  where they suddenly i guess i don't know [TS]

  i'm not sure what market force would [TS]

  have caused this but they started adding [TS]

  more and more buffet elements i think it [TS]

  started [TS]

  obviously with the state with the with [TS]

  salad bar then they start you start [TS]

  having your soups you got your breads [TS]

  you get more made a carving station and [TS]

  I think that feels very luxe to people [TS]

  when you go to las vegas & like people [TS]

  are dying for this stuff [TS]

  did I ever tell you that I was a member [TS]

  of a group called the cotillion club [TS]

  when I was in high school was that what [TS]

  was that about dancing it was about [TS]

  dancing always think italian club you [TS]

  were in continuum club seventh grade [TS]

  yeah don't know about yours [TS]

  well so you know sometime around [TS]

  I don't know 9th or 10th grade the kids [TS]

  all started whispering about cotillion [TS]

  were you or were you not going to get [TS]

  invited to tell you and I had never [TS]

  heard of continued and I didn't know [TS]

  what to expect but it was like [TS]

  a group of adults chose which kids were [TS]

  the right kids wear the fancy kids [TS]

  you're kidding to invite to cotillion [TS]

  club which was a special set of dance [TS]

  and this is in the eighties [TS]

  oh yeah special set of dances that only [TS]

  the chosen kids could attend and the [TS]

  grown-ups were like the moms and dads [TS]

  and i think that the that the the [TS]

  grown-ups chose one another to like the [TS]

  the moms and dads from from the last set [TS]

  you know picked then the the right moms [TS]

  and dads to choose the right kids for [TS]

  the next generation and so buzzed all [TS]

  the kids are whispering who's going to [TS]

  get into cotillion club and it was not a [TS]

  thing that I knew about and my mom was [TS]

  absolutely not one of the right moms and [TS]

  i was very definitely not one of the [TS]

  right kids man [TS]

  and so cotillion club comes around and [TS]

  and and you know it's like the kids are [TS]

  getting tapped like you know tap on the [TS]

  shoulder it's like skullenbones with [TS]

  dance moves [TS]

  do you want are you know yet you are [TS]

  invited to tell you do you accept your [TS]

  you know you accept or refuse to make [TS]

  your choice right and all the kids like [TS]

  oh my god I'm in cotillion [TS]

  Wow and so the selection of cotillion [TS]

  happened and I was not invited because [TS]

  the moms who made that decision i think [TS]

  there were some dads to mom's dance had [TS]

  determined that I was the bad elements i [TS]

  was the wrong i was the wrong tone [TS]

  because my parents were divorced my [TS]

  mother was a single mother who lived in [TS]

  an inappropriately big house considering [TS]

  she was a single mother so that was [TS]

  suspicious something was wrong because [TS]

  no single mother should be prospering [TS]

  and this suspicion i think in the [TS]

  neighborhood was that my mom was there [TS]

  to steal all their husbands or something [TS]

  whatever it was that they were afraid of [TS]

  single women at the time single [TS]

  professional women so I didn't get [TS]

  invited and also I was a bad kid let's [TS]

  be honest here but my friends who all [TS]

  were in continuing club rebelled [TS]

  you know you never saw this before and I [TS]

  didn't think my friends like me that [TS]

  much but they did like me enough and [TS]

  they went to their moms and they they [TS]

  staged a protest not a not an actual [TS]

  protest because these are middle-class [TS]

  kids there's an insurrection an [TS]

  insurrection and they said if you don't [TS]

  invite [TS]

  invite [TS]

  John to cotillion club then we none of [TS]

  us will go to tell and it was a [TS]

  completely false threat they all were [TS]

  gonna go to tell you whether I went or [TS]

  not but it was for that week or whenever [TS]

  it was there it was there stand for [TS]

  justice that was there that was their [TS]

  march on Selma was that they were going [TS]

  to stop this this tragedy that I hadn't [TS]

  been invited to continue so a week later [TS]

  than everyone else my invitation to [TS]

  cotillion arrived and you could just and [TS]

  you just knew the moms or so mad because [TS]

  i was i would I was gonna ruin it and [TS]

  obviously like there were very few if [TS]

  know people of color invited to [TS]

  cotillion and it was but you know this [TS]

  was before anybody felt like before any [TS]

  white people notice that there was a [TS]

  problem with that [TS]

  and so they had these dances down at the [TS]

  Hilton Hotel where members of the [TS]

  cotillion club from all the schools [TS]

  would congregate and it was basically [TS]

  like these are the right kids from the [TS]

  whole town [TS]

  these are the these are the chosen kids [TS]

  from something from the thirties yes [TS]

  absolutely but this is Anchorage in the [TS]

  eighties la even by the eighties like I [TS]

  think about when I was in like advanced [TS]

  english they had to come up with a funny [TS]

  name for it so they could they did one [TS]

  called accelerator whatever there was so [TS]

  much concerned about steering so much [TS]

  concern about like you know even then [TS]

  exhaling kids to some kind of area where [TS]

  like they didn't feel special like yeah [TS]

  I can't believe this existed but this [TS]

  was this was extra school it had nothing [TS]

  to do with the school this was a group [TS]

  that was funded and run by parents who [TS]

  wanted the best for their kids [TS]

  ok and it was absolutely like savannah [TS]

  in the thirties but the you know there [TS]

  was this super class hierarchy and [TS]

  Anchorage at the time because a lot of [TS]

  the people that settled Alaska in the [TS]

  fifties and sixties came from a the [TS]

  Northeast in you know at [TS]

  and move directly to Alaskan like they [TS]

  didn't move west they moved from new [TS]

  haven to Anchorage little bit a little [TS]

  bit of French plantation [TS]

  yeah so they brought their old culture [TS]

  which didn't continue to evolve and then [TS]

  that was you know they tried to him [TS]

  implanted in Anchorage and the end it [TS]

  was successful [TS]

  so that was the first time I ever saw [TS]

  carving station because you would go to [TS]

  cotillion and there was like a dinner / [TS]

  where there would be a giant ham and a [TS]

  giant roast beef under a metal thing and [TS]

  I person is in a chef's hat who would [TS]

  carve the meat for you and I'm standing [TS]

  there in my like already wearing like a [TS]

  a a double-knit suit because i was like [TS]

  buck you and I mean I went in to [TS]

  cotillion knowing that I was persona non [TS]

  grata with the chaperones and so I [TS]

  really played it up just you know just [TS]

  like polyester suits and bad attitude [TS]

  and show you this is not something where [TS]

  your friends want them to interrupt your [TS]

  friends wanted you in there but this was [TS]

  not something was on your radar you did [TS]

  not see someone who like I i need to [TS]

  become part of the in scene with italian [TS]

  club [TS]

  well I always imagined that my role in [TS]

  every situation was the UH was somewhere [TS]

  between a Pluto and hotter right like I [TS]

  was Bluto I was Bluto when it was time [TS]

  to start a food fight that you can pass [TS]

  but I was honor when it was time to [TS]

  stage a protest at be at the fraternity [TS]

  sorority meeting so I was the one that [TS]

  shouted Gator when it was time to get [TS]

  her I was the one that that wore a toga [TS]

  when it was time to wear toca i started [TS]

  the the conga line you know you had a [TS]

  hearing with Dean wormer you need to put [TS]

  on a time that's right put on a tie with [TS]

  and you go to the meeting with dean [TS]

  where you say Dean wormer you're [TS]

  absolutely right we're going to try and [TS]

  straighten this up you know so I could i [TS]

  I would talk to adults i actually had a [TS]

  mother I had actually a mother looked me [TS]

  in the eye and say you are such a [TS]

  bullshit are [TS]

  test and you know I was 15 right and I [TS]

  took it as the highest compliment that [TS]

  you know that this mom was driven to [TS]

  such frustration the and that she would [TS]

  swear a team you know I get with such a [TS]

  violation of her personal code right [TS]

  that I had driven her to call me [TS]

  abortion Gino she hissed at me like such [TS]

  a bullshit artist I was like haha so I [TS]

  was at cotillion but I absolutely felt I [TS]

  belonged there but I belonged there as [TS]

  the person who was trying to ruin it for [TS]

  everyone else [TS]

  oh I'm sorry make it super fun for [TS]

  everyone but in the process ruin it for [TS]

  all time all right [TS]

  yeah it looks like your your foot looks [TS]

  like it's a cake that turns into the [TS]

  Deathmobile that's exactly what that's [TS]

  exactly it [TS]

  and so every time and you know and I [TS]

  there over the course of a couple of [TS]

  years I was I was expelled from [TS]

  cotillion and then was allowed back into [TS]

  cotillion because I you know I wrote a [TS]

  wrote a letter of apology or something [TS]

  to somebody it was all just a big you [TS]

  know first and then there was College [TS]

  cotillion which was when you got back [TS]

  from college when you returned to [TS]

  anchorage a christmas break there would [TS]

  be a big dance for all the cotillion [TS]

  kids to stand around and talk about [TS]

  their fancy colleges and I went to that [TS]

  and I actually really destroyed that [TS]

  dance [TS]

  oh yeah there was there was like there [TS]

  was projectile vomiting there was [TS]

  actually no it was actually spiking the [TS]

  punch bowl real life real life spiking [TS]

  the punch bowl as though it was nineteen [TS]

  fifty that's a that's the eighties in [TS]

  Anchorage what was the if you can [TS]

  remember or gas was the endgame for [TS]

  cotillion club in terms of what the moms [TS]

  with a replicating some kind of an East [TS]

  Coast thing that they felt like they [TS]

  lost were they trying to make something [TS]

  new [TS]

  was it a feeder program into some kind [TS]

  of larger social world [TS]

  yeah it was it was the best and the [TS]

  brightest they wanted the best wanted [TS]

  the best kids by their estimation to [TS]

  understand the bomb they had with [TS]

  another and begin the process of [TS]

  creating an old boy network in the youth [TS]

  where you would like you were meeting [TS]

  one another at a time when you know you [TS]

  had some of you had already decided to [TS]

  be doctors and some had decided to be [TS]

  lawyers but the ones who are going to [TS]

  run real estate empires and owned the [TS]

  bank didn't quite know what they were [TS]

  gonna do yet you know they knew they [TS]

  were going to go into business or [TS]

  whatever but once you once you were all [TS]

  30 years down the road and you'd go into [TS]

  get a loan to start your own newspaper [TS]

  whatever again the obtained Club [TS]

  handshake [TS]

  now you sit down at the in the in the [TS]

  bank presidents office and you already [TS]

  knew each other you know each other from [TS]

  all the way back to cotillion club like [TS]

  it's a it was its how old boy networks [TS]

  get created in places where because what [TS]

  we didn't have up there was what you do [TS]

  have back east which is like family [TS]

  names so you weren't if somebody walked [TS]

  into your bank presidents office than [TS]

  and you were just like oh I'm a [TS]

  Roosevelt yeah that Vanderbilt or [TS]

  something yeah right so you know what [TS]

  that means but in Alaska that was still [TS]

  very new and actually as a Roderick you [TS]

  know my uncle had been mayor I was I've [TS]

  told you that story right where I was [TS]

  standing at some party and some adult [TS]

  walks up with this other kid my age some [TS]

  dopey looking kid and they're like I [TS]

  thought you two should meet both of your [TS]

  a you know like your uncle was mayor [TS]

  john and dopey kid here his is a his dad [TS]

  was governor and you know you guys [TS]

  should know each other and the dopey kid [TS]

  and i SAT and looked at each other like [TS]

  huh [TS]

  here there that's you there's me but [TS]

  that the idea was like how you guys are [TS]

  both part of political dynasties you [TS]

  should be so it's so weird if you knew [TS]

  each other then that would be like good [TS]

  somewhere down the line i think it's i [TS]

  think it's still goes on even as we [TS]

  would all kind of want to shun that or [TS]

  act like it doesn't exist anymore i [TS]

  think it's it still goes on it's just [TS]

  it's so coded now ms has so many levels [TS]

  to it of like seeming good intent [TS]

  in but I mean down to like I remember I [TS]

  remember first hearing some some friends [TS]

  of mine lives in New York the kids [TS]

  probably three or four years older than [TS]

  ours and it's woman whose you know clamp [TS]

  she's very prominent in the tech world [TS]

  and basically the floor first hearing [TS]

  the phrase feeder preschool which is to [TS]

  this day it just makes me shudder at [TS]

  some park slope shit right there he [TS]

  absolutely think that but well I think [TS]

  they might leave Manhattan my night [TS]

  people i'm not sure but in any case but [TS]

  like now I mean when I first heard that [TS]

  I was like you've got to be kidding me [TS]

  when your feet are school I think of [TS]

  that is an undergraduate program that [TS]

  tends to get certain kinds of candidates [TS]

  whether its medical or business or [TS]

  whatever tends to get them into like an [TS]

  Ivy League school it's a feeder school [TS]

  and I you know what I won't even accept [TS]

  that there are prep schools that are [TS]

  feeder schools for undergrad programs [TS]

  like that all makes sense in some kind [TS]

  of Catcher in the Rye way to me but like [TS]

  the idea of a feeder preschool that your [TS]

  three-year-old has to be going to the [TS]

  right school in order to get into the [TS]

  right elementary school [TS]

  it's completely bananas we applied to [TS]

  five free schools in san francisco and [TS]

  we got into one [TS]

  oh my god yeah and I mean you know they [TS]

  weren't like we're not talking like prep [TS]

  schools were talking fancy but I mean [TS]

  you know they cost money and stuff [TS]

  yeah but there are three schools there [TS]

  preschools the preschool near our house [TS]

  the montessori school near our house has [TS]

  a required five-day-a-week attendances [TS]

  fifteen hundred dollars a month [TS]

  yeah yeah well I hear this from my new [TS]

  york friends all the time like the [TS]

  reason that a lot of them don't bring [TS]

  their kids on the joco Cruz anymore is [TS]

  because they cannot afford to miss a [TS]

  week of grade school because if they if [TS]

  their attendance is bad [TS]

  by which I mean miss one week of school [TS]

  their attendance is that bad they won't [TS]

  get into the right junior high and I'm [TS]

  just like all of the you you should just [TS]

  take your kids out of school if those [TS]

  are the rules [TS]

  there's a part of that I have to say I'm [TS]

  of two minds is a part of that makes [TS]

  absolute sense to me and then a much [TS]

  larger part of that is so fucking [TS]

  bananas I can't even believe it [TS]

  especially eve even in elementary school [TS]

  you know i mean i understand that we [TS]

  don't want my kid missing school I I [TS]

  don't like her to be sick [TS]

  misc stuff because it's all cumulative [TS]

  especially with common core stuff like [TS]

  you really you need to know the stuff to [TS]

  know this stuff and you've got to be [TS]

  there and you've got to keep you know [TS]

  you lose momentum when you miss those [TS]

  days but the idea that like a just I [TS]

  don't know there's something about that [TS]

  that is really dispiriting to me [TS]

  especially given how many people I know [TS]

  who you know can manage to like make a [TS]

  living and live in this atrocious city [TS]

  and like how much time and energy it [TS]

  takes to be like the parent of somebody [TS]

  in that system and then like why [TS]

  obviously the extension that being like [TS]

  holy shit what about the kids you don't [TS]

  have that like who is like fighting for [TS]

  them to even get like a morsel it's [TS]

  insane to me well you know one thing we [TS]

  haven't talked about on this program is [TS]

  the biz the billionaire party that we [TS]

  went to [TS]

  oh yeah do you feel comfortable talking [TS]

  about the billionaire party I'm you know [TS]

  that's a big family type that here on my [TS]

  computer [TS]

  um I we could talk about that at some [TS]

  point [TS]

  yeah I mean we went to a party where [TS]

  Elon Musk was there I didn't see him you [TS]

  know what I heard he was there is a lot [TS]

  of that lot a lot of nice like nice [TS]

  people they're very very nice people but [TS]

  a lot of people in their forties early [TS]

  forties yeah who are also billionaires [TS]

  yeah 3 con club and they're all in there [TS]

  all ended up at a party together [TS]

  yeah if a bomb had gone off there would [TS]

  be no internet today where there would [TS]

  be no monetization even know how to turn [TS]

  it back on right there be like well the [TS]

  guy that the guy that turns on the [TS]

  internet on immunization yeah I got it [TS]

  turns on the internet every morning is [TS]

  but he died in the party bomb [TS]

  how are we gonna are we gonna make money [TS]

  off of this now [TS]

  mm um you know I we can talk about that [TS]

  I you mentioned last week which was a [TS]

  very interesting episode of this program [TS]

  after we finished talking [TS]

  well you did hinted during the program [TS]

  that it was big week for you in more [TS]

  than one way the story that you told [TS]

  last week about getting ninety-four [TS]

  percent of your home is back [TS]

  uh was certainly a big week but i was [TS]

  curious if you wanted to talk about the [TS]

  other thing that you mentioned but you [TS]

  could save for another show is it no [TS]

  will you die but I wouldn't what was I [TS]

  talking about uh you're making a [TS]

  down payment alright oh yes i will talk [TS]

  about it so we can table the [TS]

  billionaire's for now [TS]

  yeah I know you don't want to talk about [TS]

  the boat no you didn't i got a whole [TS]

  stack to think the thing about the [TS]

  billionaire's I know that you run into [TS]

  him at the supermarket and you have to [TS]

  be like no way they have a special [TS]

  billionaire [TS]

  hey Jim hey Tony and they're like oh [TS]

  yeah I heard your program we talk about [TS]

  the billionaire party know what first [TS]

  rule of billionaire party right right i [TS]

  did show additional text conversation in [TS]

  my what was she when you were with me [TS]

  too I bet I can get your dad's voice but [TS]

  I met a very nice man today named evan [TS]

  he says that he knows you from from [TS]

  something that you worked on a long to [TS]

  become like crap but that's you know [TS]

  yeah very nice man so what so why how he [TS]

  talked about this [TS]

  well yet happening yeah so the other day [TS]

  I went I was so a couple of weeks ago I [TS]

  was driving up to bellingham and my [TS]

  daughter's mother had to pick up some [TS]

  apologies i had to come up there and get [TS]

  ya get a double filson bag full of [TS]

  apologies and bring it back to Seattle [TS]

  make it a nicer place [TS]

  yeah it and so I'm driving up there and [TS]

  my daughter's mother points and yells [TS]

  were in Marysville Washington she points [TS]

  and yells off to the side of freeway and [TS]

  she goes GMC RV and I looked over and it [TS]

  sold an RV dealer and there are 85 rvs [TS]

  all of them that look like I mean [TS]

  gigantic houses on wheels and then right [TS]

  in the middle there's like it's like a [TS]

  broken tooth there's this tiny little [TS]

  thing and it's a GMC RV and so I make [TS]

  make a mental note of it and when we [TS]

  drive back from bellingham we drive past [TS]

  it again and we both look at it go bad [TS]

  is a GMC RV and it's sitting on an RV [TS]

  lot and so we go home we don't stop and [TS]

  a and after a couple of days I I i asked [TS]

  my daughter's mother why don't you call [TS]

  that dealership and see what the what [TS]

  the story is with the GMC RV [TS]

  maybe a little bit of an organization [TS]

  here of course just to explain that when [TS]

  you say GM cr-v a lot of people just [TS]

  gonna hear some letters [TS]

  yeah James Murphy we had a fairly [TS]

  detailed discussion about the GMC RV [TS]

  yeah they're on a past episode we talked [TS]

  about this at length and what a cherry [TS]

  bit of kit this thing that's right [TS]

  longtime listeners will know what we're [TS]

  talking about here and in fact I've told [TS]

  you before right that the GMC RV episode [TS]

  precipitated an email from a guy who [TS]

  said hey I loved that show [TS]

  longtime listener the program I also [TS]

  happen to be President of the Northwest [TS]

  gmcr V club and also the grandson of the [TS]

  guy mr. birch who helped design the GMC [TS]

  RV and one of them is called a birch [TS]

  haven one of the designs is called the [TS]

  purchase even named after my grandfather [TS]

  that's so much cooler than cotillion [TS]

  club it's very bizarre and and you know [TS]

  we we do this all the time on this [TS]

  program we talk about things and then [TS]

  all of a sudden the other day what a [TS]

  senior editor at The New York Times [TS]

  retweeted our program and said you guys [TS]

  have gotta listen to this episode it's [TS]

  just like wow that's cool but he seems [TS]

  like a gorgeous gorgeous nineteen [TS]

  seventies RV it's kind of like a [TS]

  Superman Superman i think is that how he [TS]

  describes the time it's it's it's real [TS]

  big your arm but it's not it's not [TS]

  Winnebago big not win a big okay it's [TS]

  like a big van you can you drive around [TS]

  town but it's but it's a it's got a bed [TS]

  in the back and a bathroom and a kitchen [TS]

  and couch and so far anyway so we we we [TS]

  call up to the dealer and the dealer [TS]

  says yeah we got this thing here we [TS]

  don't know anything about it and frankly [TS]

  we don't want to know anything about it [TS]

  we're in the market where were you know [TS]

  we're in the business of selling these [TS]

  $250,000 Winnebagos and this [TS]

  some guy came in and traded it in on a [TS]

  new Winnebago and it's sitting there and [TS]

  and it's thirteen thousand dollars and [TS]

  so you know what get to take it or don't [TS]

  we don't give a sh 0 [TS]

  and we were like well that is a that's [TS]

  not that's not that is not out of reach [TS]

  yeah it's a fairly reasonable price for [TS]

  these the really nice ones can be 50 or [TS]

  30 but you know 13,000 is right in the [TS]

  sort of low end of normal or low end of [TS]

  like this one is is a in good condition [TS]

  you know etc so eventually one day i say [TS]

  i'm just going to go up there [TS]

  marysville isn't close to seattle but [TS]

  it's you know close enough and I'm not [TS]

  doing anything I'm just gonna drive up [TS]

  there and see what see what's what [TS]

  so I Drive up and I go and look at it [TS]

  and it seems like you know the carpet [TS]

  was changed its now sort of a tease [TS]

  hotel lobby carpet there some things [TS]

  have been changed about it but also the [TS]

  the previous owners had done a lot of [TS]

  modifications that improved the vehicle [TS]

  and everyone in the subculture refers to [TS]

  them as coaches like our coach and yeah [TS]

  what condition is your coach and I'm [TS]

  sort of like a coach is one of those [TS]

  words I don't want to say don't say [TS]

  coach I think you will have probably [TS]

  eventually I was like me how was it was [TS]

  the interior like well they've taken it [TS]

  so they changed the shag carpet was gone [TS]

  and the original upholstery was gone and [TS]

  it had been reupholstered in a sort of [TS]

  color that I can only describe as a [TS]

  black berry smoothie which is very [TS]

  divisive certain people see it and [TS]

  they're like that like what like what [TS]

  it's like a used car lot waiting room [TS]

  kind of like like Industrial carpet [TS]

  no no it's it's that the carpet on the [TS]

  floor has yeah like little emblems [TS]

  little fleur de lys on it that are sort [TS]

  of like I don't know what you're [TS]

  thinking but the upholstery is great [TS]

  plush purple fabric i personally think [TS]

  it's hilarious and great other people in [TS]

  my clan think it is hideous but not not [TS]

  the best taste but you know to each his [TS]

  own [TS]

  how many of these you gonna come across [TS]

  that's right there aren't a whole lot of [TS]

  them although there is a secondary [TS]

  market for them but you know not be as [TS]

  John this is a great thing to have a [TS]

  hobby about so I'm sitting I'm sitting [TS]

  in this RV I'm talking to the salesman [TS]

  whose name is Todd with 1d Todd in 1d [TS]

  that [TS]

  fly and Todd on his business card has [TS]

  photograph of himself with a pair of [TS]

  oakley sunglasses perched on top of his [TS]

  head doesn't happen by accident but no [TS]

  it doesn't he was like right there's the [TS]

  picture of me I want on my business card [TS]

  but it turns out i really like todd todd [TS]

  is like extremely likeable he is a [TS]

  salesman and he selling but he's also a [TS]

  good guy like I just instinctively like [TS]

  Todd he probably has jet skied sure but [TS]

  I don't hold that against such as part [TS]

  of his culture that's right so stop are [TS]

  sitting there I'm like well time I mean [TS]

  what about this what about that he's [TS]

  like frankly uh uh the thing is as is i [TS]

  don't want to know about it and nobody [TS]

  here does so if you want to buy it if [TS]

  you don't don't ask any questions [TS]

  because the if you flip the switch and [TS]

  it goes on then you know it works if you [TS]

  flip the switch and it doesn't go on you [TS]

  can presume that read to you because to [TS]

  me that that that reads as primarily [TS]

  first a tactic that he might use for [TS]

  anything on the lot but then secondarily [TS]

  it reads as there's something that's [TS]

  gonna blow up yeah exactly both things [TS]

  like there's an F there's an axial [TS]

  that's going to go as soon as your off [TS]

  the lot both things seem true and so I [TS]

  thought about it some more and I and and [TS]

  then I called my friend Greg birch and I [TS]

  said hey why want somebody to go look at [TS]

  this with me do you have anybody in your [TS]

  uh rolodex and he was like let me call [TS]

  you back and then immediately texted me [TS]

  and said yeah there's a guy that lives [TS]

  up there who's a member of our club and [TS]

  he will come look at it with you [TS]

  that's so cool that's why you have an RV [TS]

  club [TS]

  yes so I show up at the thing and this [TS]

  man arrives and he's about 70 years old [TS]

  and he is wearing suspenders clip-on [TS]

  suspenders holding up his jeans like it [TS]

  so far and he's got great hair and he's [TS]

  a you know he's a heavyset guy [TS]

  and he used to work at Boeing which is I [TS]

  think true of every single GMC RV owner [TS]

  in the northwest and he walks up and he [TS]

  just starts spinning some knowledge and [TS]

  he walks around he's like oh I see [TS]

  they've upgraded the the grommets looks [TS]

  like they changed that nipple out for a [TS]

  stainless nipple [TS]

  oh and look at here and they've got that [TS]

  they they added the edit the the [TS]

  secondary boost boost the battery [TS]

  spinner and it's hot it's hot there well [TS]

  this guy's dunno todd has got no Todd [TS]

  doesn't give a shit Todd is off 750,000 [TS]

  Winnebagos ok and it's just me and the [TS]

  guy so this was probably a trade-in I [TS]

  was absolutely a trade ok and so a so [TS]

  the guy whose name is Tom which goes [TS]

  very well Todd a new twins named Tommy [TS]

  top Tom and Todd tom is like he's [TS]

  pulling up the carpet is looking in the [TS]

  he's looking in the the back he's [TS]

  fiddling with the front he's he's down [TS]

  he's like you know he's an old man and [TS]

  he's down on the ground looking [TS]

  underneath it and he pronounces that he [TS]

  thinks the coaches in great condition [TS]

  see I'm already calling our coach is [TS]

  like this is a number one coach and he [TS]

  loves the purple upholstery and so he [TS]

  gives it the because of the Bill of good [TS]

  health and I'm like I'm feeling stronger [TS]

  and stronger about this all the time as [TS]

  Tom I mean part of the first of all must [TS]

  be kind of fun for Tom to get to do that [TS]

  super fun that mean that that's good for [TS]

  everybody and thank god bless time for [TS]

  coming but also i'll bet you Tom in a [TS]

  heartbeat would call your attention to [TS]

  something bunkers all he absolutely [TS]

  would and he had that wheel should not [TS]

  move like that she had the expertise to [TS]

  say like to see I mean he knew some deep [TS]

  science on it and he said some [TS]

  interesting things he was like listen [TS]

  every RV leaks i'm sure this one leaks [TS]

  they all leak because they're enormous [TS]

  tubes that are subject to torque and [TS]

  torsion and tour she owned [TS]

  oh there's a lot of parts to move they [TS]

  move and they twist and they ski to [TS]

  shake a little bit shake [TS]

  and so eventually they're all going to [TS]

  leak and so don't be worried about leaks [TS]

  you have to fix leaks but it's just it's [TS]

  part of owning an RV if you want to do [TS]

  things like owning it and it's like it's [TS]

  like me a boner without having a fucking [TS]

  boat like there's gonna be money and [TS]

  time you put into this but you're not [TS]

  living on it you're not living on its [TS]

  not going to sink right right so so then [TS]

  I'm talking to go find Todd and I'm like [TS]

  so what are we going to do with this [TS]

  like kid here it is there [TS]

  I think I probably want it and Todd too [TS]

  to his credit says look when i say i [TS]

  don't care about this thing i'm serious [TS]

  i don't care about it and so frankly if [TS]

  you are very odd cells that [TS]

  yeah he's great he's making your dad's [TS]

  got something here is obviously an [TS]

  enthusiast for this kind of fairly rare [TS]

  vehicle he's like fucking I don't care [TS]

  yep so he says look if you offer me a [TS]

  thousand dollars right now i'll take [TS]

  what i was like really ok i'll buy [TS]

  prayed thousand dollars he was like [TS]

  great sold [TS]

  holy shit John and I said alright well [TS]

  that was the best that was the easiest [TS]

  negotiation I ever did and so so Todd [TS]

  says you want to try and get a loan for [TS]

  it and I was like yeah as a matter of [TS]

  fact I do and so we went we went through [TS]

  all this rigmarole with the banks and [TS]

  the bank came back and said this person [TS]

  is self-employed and that right there is [TS]

  a reason it reject him but also some [TS]

  years he makes this amount of money and [TS]

  some years he makes that amount of money [TS]

  and that is too much of a variation [TS]

  probably not even sure which graph to [TS]

  use yeah they put all my information [TS]

  into the into the Machine and machine [TS]

  spit out a giant ? leave club and it [TS]

  started to smoke and what I discovered [TS]

  was I my credit rating is 830 and Todd [TS]

  was like for the 830 credit rating you [TS]

  should be able to just you should be [TS]

  able to buy a plane airplane but then I [TS]

  brought my tax returns because they [TS]

  insisted because I'm self-employed right [TS]

  and then the tax returns really confuse [TS]

  them [TS]

  and they were like you what now [TS]

  different forms you made up that are [TS]

  written longhand yes I'm just like don't [TS]

  know this is basically this is this is [TS]

  super a normal and they're like this is [TS]

  not normal you're your income is as are [TS]

  incomprehensible to us we are a bank and [TS]

  so they rejected me for a car loan for [TS]

  eight thousand dollars and I was [TS]

  offended drivers i was i was mad and [TS]

  then I thought about it for a while and [TS]

  I was like oh and I could just go ahead [TS]

  and buy it i was like i could write a [TS]

  check i don't have to get a bank loan [TS]

  that was just something fun that I was [TS]

  gonna do get a get a loan for the fun of [TS]

  it let that put a bad taste in your [TS]

  mouth you get your getting a coach [TS]

  yeah so I went in and I was like here [TS]

  Todd i'll buy and he was like oh alright [TS]

  well get out of here then and so I fired [TS]

  it up and I drove it off the lot and I [TS]

  drove home [TS]

  I can't believe it yeah I'm so fucking [TS]

  excited to see this thing [TS]

  well but here's the beers the rub so i [TS]

  got it home and parked in my front yard [TS]

  and then I you know when you know you've [TS]

  really moved into the neighborhood [TS]

  yeah when I went to bed and they're [TS]

  checking i woke up the next morning I [TS]

  walked out and I was like oh shit i have [TS]

  become a guy with like an old shitty [TS]

  decrepid motor home in his yard [TS]

  you got a jimmy carter era RV coach in [TS]

  your yard hope this pre Jimmy Carter [TS]

  this is 75 this is a as afford this was [TS]

  you know for RV yeah this is a this is a [TS]

  gerald r ford era recreational vehicle [TS]

  John um and so it hadn't thought about [TS]

  that you won't fit your part right well [TS]

  there's been some talk about whether it [TS]

  would fit in the barn I don't think it [TS]

  will I would have to move all the [TS]

  vestments all the non-working vestments [TS]

  out of the barn to fit in minot you know [TS]

  my like how am I hashed up RV so you [TS]

  have problem right now is ever so now [TS]

  I'm like shifting into high gear here [TS]

  like I'd better join this RV enthusiasts [TS]

  club i had better oh and the other thing [TS]

  is I'm time between about it and I get a [TS]

  i get a tweet from this guy I [TS]

  Isaac Marion who is a an author who has [TS]

  written some popular books about zombies [TS]

  and one of them was made into a movie [TS]

  called where the zombie fella but it was [TS]

  like a love story with the zombie like a [TS]

  young good-looking zombie who falls in [TS]

  love with a girl or something that will [TS]

  occupy like twilight type thing yeah but [TS]

  with zombies and it's sure it's funny [TS]

  it's like a like a romantic comedy but [TS]

  like one of the people is dead [TS]

  nice and so Isaac Marion is a friend of [TS]

  mine on Twitter and a very nice man and [TS]

  he sends me a tweet he's like I own one [TS]

  of those and i was like you what I mean [TS]

  he's like a young handsome successful [TS]

  office very good-looking guy John yeah [TS]

  he's nice nice looking man and a very [TS]

  nice man smart smart author author smart [TS]

  huh [TS]

  he says yeah I used to live in it in [TS]

  ballard before the cops got wise to me [TS]

  and they made me stop live in it but I [TS]

  love my GMC RV and I was like Isaac you [TS]

  got to come up and see this RV with me [TS]

  so he did he got in my truck I want [TS]

  picked him up at a cafe we drove up [TS]

  looked at the RV was like oh this is [TS]

  amazing so that we honestly voice is an [TS]

  estimation of it he feel like it was a [TS]

  good buy [TS]

  also he has a small one there's [TS]

  agreement to sign I got the big one all [TS]

  to look at the schematic right now [TS]

  yeah so he's like out two rooms it's got [TS]

  yeah it's it's it's his bits as big as a [TS]

  it's as big as a house on small it's so [TS]

  cool [TS]

  so anyway so Isaac gives me the clean [TS]

  bill of health and I so now I'm in a [TS]

  position basically we're not only do i [TS]

  have to join this subculture fast and [TS]

  figure it out but also i feel like i'm [TS]

  going to start a subculture I feel like [TS]

  it's time for young people to start [TS]

  buying rvs in general and GMC rvs in [TS]

  particular this is not something for [TS]

  retirees John you're telling people who [TS]

  are there still full of them and vigor [TS]

  people who are still full of life it's [TS]

  time to go out and buy yourself a purple [TS]

  RV get a purple RV drive it down to Big [TS]

  Sur and get your picture in Sunset [TS]

  magazine like this is happening this is [TS]

  a new subculture and it's going to be [TS]

  like it's the new motorcycle gang for [TS]

  four people in their thirties and [TS]

  forties and fifties name of a little [TS]

  slower and sometimes maybe like to have [TS]

  a little now [TS]

  yeah he got a juicer on board in case [TS]

  you want some juice that's nice too [TS]

  fresh juice you know a jen that you wake [TS]

  up in the morning your gear right there [TS]

  Big Sur you got a fresh glass of juice [TS]

  cooking surface [TS]

  I'm telling you there's a whole lot [TS]

  there's a whole there's a refrigerator [TS]

  there's a lot of animals my god it's and [TS]

  it's got all these little like the the [TS]

  couch turns into a bump I want that I [TS]

  love stuff that turns into stuff and get [TS]

  a little things with doors you can put [TS]

  stuff in [TS]

  yep little things with doors little [TS]

  things that turn into other things just [TS]

  so fucking cool so it's got and it's got [TS]

  a its got one of those old the [TS]

  Oldsmobile 455 motors which are like [TS]

  it's got up there's a whole culture [TS]

  people that just care about that motor [TS]

  you can pull Todd's jetski if he had to [TS]

  absolutely I could you know I'm I mean I [TS]

  swear to you Gary is across the street [TS]

  going [TS]

  why does that guy get everything is [TS]

  looking at jobs it's just like oh my god [TS]

  i'm living in my ford van and he's you [TS]

  just unintentionally gave Gary the [TS]

  biggest fuck you in history of [TS]

  everything first plate as he doesn't [TS]

  remember that you've met before right [TS]

  he's living in a nice living in a van [TS]

  screaming about obama on his phone into [TS]

  his lady in the middle of the night [TS]

  yeah and then you pull up with like the [TS]

  sweetest right can you pull it into your [TS]

  yard you know that's what a fuck you [TS]

  poor Gary well the whole neighborhood [TS]

  now has to be like okay this is either a [TS]

  harbinger of of of like a new era where [TS]

  all of a sudden his yard is gonna fill [TS]

  up with junk cars but it only takes one [TS]

  yeah or he's doing something that the [TS]

  rest of us you know like here we he's [TS]

  our guru we need to follow him or on [TS]

  meth lab or meth lab right but you know [TS]

  eight thousand dollars you almost [TS]

  couldn't afford not to buy it I i was [TS]

  gonna guess I don't know how collectible [TS]

  these things are imagine they need a [TS]

  fair amount of maintenance and upkeep it [TS]

  yeah i was gonna just starting at 25 [TS]

  yeah so and I think you know you can fix [TS]

  them up so now I'm now i'm in this whole [TS]

  mode where it's like well I'm gonna fix [TS]

  this thing up [TS]

  I would kind of like to return it to [TS]

  era-appropriate finishes by which i mean [TS]

  like sheepdog shag carpet [TS]

  uh-huh in burnt umber or what I'm [TS]

  looking at as a real it's real over a [TS]

  overbearing kind of green pattern and [TS]

  economic Otto exactly there's a lot of [TS]

  paisley yeah you keep yourself bunk beds [TS]

  yes but my like God bunk beds bunk beds [TS]

  and a queen size bed in the back and the [TS]

  AMIA the little uh little dinette set [TS]

  also turns into a full-size bed you put [TS]

  66 people in there if there are six [TS]

  people that are in love with each other [TS]

  you know what was the seventies you [TS]

  gotta be you gotta be cuddling it's a [TS]

  little bit of a key party scene and now [TS]

  some tarps and that I think about the [TS]

  the key party aspect of it I feel like [TS]

  what if you get three GMC rvs in any one [TS]

  place there's going to be wife-swapping [TS]

  god oh my god i would just I want to see [TS]

  this thing just just pulled up to my [TS]

  house someday wasn't much can be driving [TS]

  that far apart again that's what it's [TS]

  meant for mean it really like this make [TS]

  it you think [TS]

  yeah i'm gonna go the first thing I'm [TS]

  gonna do is go through all the systems [TS]

  and make sure that mechanically it is [TS]

  ready to its only 50,000 miles on like [TS]

  mechanically I'm getting this was [TS]

  sitting somewhere for a long time oh [TS]

  yeah i was sitting in some guys barn [TS]

  probably somebody somebody had it and [TS]

  maybe it had something worth fixing died [TS]

  and another for 20-30 years became old [TS]

  and then there is so yeah i'm gonna i'm [TS]

  i'm preparing it to be my land yacht I'm [TS]

  gonna take it up and down the coast all [TS]

  the time and and it's gonna be my gonna [TS]

  be my new scene is gonna be my weekend [TS]

  thing [TS]

  oh this is you know what buddy I gotta [TS]

  tell you I think this is a good move i [TS]

  think it's a healthy move and I think [TS]

  it's a way to potentially channel a lot [TS]

  of your occupations no no pseudo [TS]

  distractions concerns and relative [TS]

  primitive gestures into one coach the [TS]

  thing I'm the only thing I'm worried [TS]

  about is that I just gave myself and i [TS]

  all-consuming leisure activity that I [TS]

  wasn't you know I wasn't sitting around [TS]

  like I don't have enough time for I have [TS]

  too much time and I'd like to burn [TS]

  something a diet time and money that i [TS]

  want to burn in a new leisure activity [TS]

  it's very much like getting a boat it's [TS]

  just a dance better than about yes [TS]

  priming boats boats ridonkulous [TS]

  expensive to keep up [TS]

  yeah and with this I mean especially if [TS]

  you're not doing too many might want to [TS]

  buy the nice triple-a is there some kind [TS]

  of super triple-a you can get there is i [TS]

  already have it [TS]

  oh yeah I got a nice trip away a long [TS]

  time ago because I because what I didn't [TS]

  want was to call triple-a and have them [TS]

  tell me something to help me tell me [TS]

  that they look no excuses like yeah I [TS]

  was just like I'm gonna get the biggest [TS]

  triple-a so that when i call you from [TS]

  somewhere out in the boonies you come [TS]

  without giving me a bunch of rigmarole [TS]

  doesn't take too many uses of that to [TS]

  really pay for itself [TS]

  oh it's an amazing service even though [TS]

  even though as we've said well as we've [TS]

  said before at least fifty percent of [TS]

  the time you call triple-a you get [TS]

  somebody who doesn't even know like they [TS]

  probably their mom times their shoes in [TS]

  the morning know someone who were very [TS]

  confusing and 1.8 basically became a [TS]

  proxy for going to the mechanic for me [TS]

  oh yeah to wear a circa nineteen [TS]

  eighty-nine I got the letter because you [TS]

  can get the letter from home [TS]

  what's the letter you get the ladder and [TS]

  triple-a says hey look you're you're [TS]

  overdoing it overdoing it like the week [TS]

  that we can't be doing this twice a [TS]

  month for you [TS]

  yeah right and and that and I know that [TS]

  too and the other day I was I the GMC RV [TS]

  because it had been sitting for a long [TS]

  time its battery wouldn't hold a charge [TS]

  so i went down to the autozone and i [TS]

  bought a hot new battery and and my [TS]

  family was like oh why don't you just [TS]

  call triple-a get them to come and and I [TS]

  was like because i'm saving up and you [TS]

  get to keep your powder dry and saving [TS]

  up my triple-a calls because i just [TS]

  bought a 40 year old RV it's couch i [TS]

  have 40 year old coach and when i call [TS]

  triple-a it's going to be serious right [TS]

  a bigger bigger bigger touchback [TS]

  I'm gonna be way way out somewhere [TS]

  I'm gonna need I'm gonna need some help [TS]

  on this special higher class like super [TS]

  secret black card version triple-a for [TS]

  people who have a coach we pay like 35 [TS]

  times as much but they will actually [TS]

  like to you to it to a sex depends on [TS]

  like what's available where you are in [TS]

  death valley your options might be kind [TS]

  of limited i actually have that black [TS]

  card RV motorcycle [TS]

  okay i know i officially believe you [TS]

  didn't know existed [TS]

  yep RV motorcycle where they'll pick up [TS]

  a motorcycle which is a certain kind of [TS]

  weird knowing where they need a flatbed [TS]

  and then they will also to an RV so I'm [TS]

  expecting that when i finally call [TS]

  triple-a i will have to hitchhike to a [TS]

  phone booth to get them on the phone [TS]

  because there won't be cell service and [TS]

  i'm going to say listen I know it's time [TS]

  that's how you know open the provisions [TS]

  like this it i'm at mile poor milepost [TS]

  4,000 on the and on UFO highway and I [TS]

  need anything really really really big [TS]

  talker huh i certainly think we could [TS]

  just give you a push nope don't think [TS]

  that's gonna work that was going to push [TS]

  we get the fuck you level triple-a that [TS]

  we've got this will give you a push if [TS]

  you had that I know they want to give [TS]

  you a point i think there's levels of [TS]

  time and liability involved in different [TS]

  things and I've on numerous occasions [TS]

  had them want to put just do you steer [TS]

  and we'll push that anyone hook you up [TS]

  whoa again really don't want to bring [TS]

  out the big roll away where they pushing [TS]

  you [TS]

  they get behind you with the big bumper [TS]

  and they they want to push you to wear [TS]

  to wherever you're goin wherever it [TS]

  needs to be driven [TS]

  well that doesn't sound safe at all yeah [TS]

  you want that's it's worth upgrading [TS]

  from that I guess a yep get the good [TS]

  triple-a em so about but the the number [TS]

  one thing about restoring an RV is that [TS]

  the danger is that you get in there and [TS]

  you start putting spice in the spice [TS]

  rack right but oh you don't lose your [TS]

  way [TS]

  yeah right you've got you can't occupy [TS]

  it until you've got it straightened out [TS]

  you know you can't just start going in [TS]

  there and putting throw pillows around [TS]

  if you're going to rip up the carpet [TS]

  right and so she also you do want to use [TS]

  it [TS]

  yeah thing you don't want this to just [TS]

  be a boat project we're just a rich guy [TS]

  with nothing better to do this is you [TS]

  want your family to be able to roll [TS]

  around in this that's right so so so the [TS]

  current challenges prioritizing fix it [TS]

  up projects so that we get the we get [TS]

  the main mechanical ones done [TS]

  immediately and then we get the we have [TS]

  a list of the other mechanical stuff [TS]

  that we need to get done and then we [TS]

  have like how how much like fabric [TS]

  cleaner and windex do we need to get in [TS]

  here and start enjoying it i look at [TS]

  that windshield you can just see [TS]

  everything can it's a big big windshield [TS]

  and it's one of the nice things about [TS]

  them is that so they just have huge [TS]

  windows I see this this i mean like this [TS]

  inside it's likely it's like you're [TS]

  living room [TS]

  yeah so it's it's so it feels very light [TS]

  and airy in there it's not it doesn't [TS]

  feel like a claustrophobic RV is stinky [TS]

  well how stinky is it stinky in the [TS]

  sense that at some point along the way [TS]

  an old person put some sort of fabric [TS]

  softener got a potpourri solution yeah [TS]

  potpourri and so you walk in there and [TS]

  you're like I don't know what the bad [TS]

  smells are in this place because it's [TS]

  all covered with potpourri they could it [TS]

  could be terrible [TS]

  it could smell like mold and cats and [TS]

  and end times in there but but i don't [TS]

  but you want to know what it is you're [TS]

  smelling and you're gonna be able to [TS]

  keep the varmints out of this probably [TS]

  right he's got good seals and everything [TS]

  yeah but I feel like keep environments [TS]

  out is also another thing like leaks [TS]

  where you just know that it's part of RV [TS]

  ownership that that mice are going to [TS]

  try and get into your RV coach life [TS]

  that's correct that's right coach life [TS]

  it's ok it's it's my it's my new life [TS]

  coach life is the good life [TS]

  it's getting ugly dress at all you get [TS]

  captain's hat it's very unclear to me [TS]

  how to dress in a seventies RVD dragon [TS]

  Commodore Schmidlapp kind of look for [TS]

  you [TS]

  mm you know i'm thinking a [TS]

  double-breasted navy blazer Atlee [TS]

  east ok I I you know I can't believe I [TS]

  just said this I said are you gonna get [TS]

  a captain's hat I you will probably [TS]

  choose captains hat from amongst the [TS]

  ones you have already [TS]

  the problem with the with my current [TS]

  captain's hat selection is that I have [TS]

  some shitty captain's hats [TS]

  let's setup great huh it's time to [TS]

  upgrade to get a good captain's hat that [TS]

  befits my status as the captain captain [TS]

  the coach food [TS]

  coach congratulations you're gonna love [TS]

  it [TS]

  you can wait your whole family's gonna [TS]

  let we're gonna drive around San [TS]

  Francisco together we're going to cause [TS]

  a lot of problems for people in this [TS]

  yep yep [TS]