Roderick on the Line

Ep. 202: "The Anchorman"


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  [Music] [TS]

  hello hi John Boop sinuses are a wreck [TS]

  what happened to your sinus you know [TS]

  what happened to my sinuses are using [TS]

  them for something that they're not [TS]

  authorized for it depends who's doing [TS]

  the authorizing the great mr robert [TS]

  evans was saying was easy i'm just for [TS]

  what their intended fishing this weekend [TS]

  you bet your ass I was [TS]

  yeah you traveled and then I was on far [TS]

  too twice so I'm just you know thank my [TS]

  lucky stars that so far huh [TS]

  I'm not sick oh my god too far to banana [TS]

  and two nights in a hotel [TS]

  yeah I don't think always in witness [TS]

  protection for a couple nights could [TS]

  have been the work you did the type i [TS]

  don't suppose you touch the TV remote [TS]

  without a bag o is going good [TS]

  I you know I feel like today is it is [TS]

  one of those jam updates [TS]

  oh yeah the whole way in it was just [TS]

  everything was a jamup don't know I'm [TS]

  sorry I you're early [TS]

  well yeah but I mean it wasn't like none [TS]

  of it was a terrible Jam up but i just [TS]

  had that vibe of like everything is [TS]

  going to be a channel i hate the gym I [TS]

  know exactly what you're talking about [TS]

  it's like you have an idea about how [TS]

  this should go [TS]

  mm and but-but-but-but like a great [TS]

  u-haul truck existence has put a [TS]

  governor on your life you're not allowed [TS]

  to go quite at the propulsive velocity [TS]

  that you need to make this thing go [TS]

  mhm that's exactly right there it's [TS]

  right isn't that kind of the feeling [TS]

  it's like you're thinking like that you [TS]

  know what I've gotten enough I've broken [TS]

  inertia enough to get in motion and now [TS]

  i just need to keep moving just keep [TS]

  moving and that's I their jamup days [TS]

  where I'm the jam up [TS]

  I don't think that's the problem today [TS]

  is that right yeah the gym up days where [TS]

  I'm the jam up or like where my keys [TS]

  where my classes what is going on [TS]

  stub stub your toe let's get a spider in [TS]

  your mouth [TS]

  oh no we're like what the Bible [TS]

  been awakened a like 10 minutes to get a [TS]

  spider Mountain already stubbed my toe [TS]

  what why am i bleeding why is there [TS]

  blood on it should not let this really [TS]

  this is a channel this is the jam up but [TS]

  today was one of these jamup swear i'm [TS]

  on a two-lane road or mm sorry for late [TS]

  road two lanes in each direction the two [TS]

  cars driving side-by-side 40 miles an [TS]

  hour on a 45 mile an hour round thanks a [TS]

  million Romulus and Remus and helps [TS]

  anybody and everybody behind is trying [TS]

  to pick which one of these people is [TS]

  like the oblivious like dope [TS]

  that's just driving that never look in [TS]

  their rearview mirror and it's just [TS]

  going to be going 40 miles an hour the [TS]

  rest of the day no matter what which one [TS]

  of these people is like the [TS]

  inconsiderate but knowledgeable person [TS]

  who's driving 40 miles an hour because [TS]

  they're looking at their phone or [TS]

  they've got you know and then there at [TS]

  at some point they're going to become [TS]

  aware and then potentially could speed [TS]

  up or get out of the way you know [TS]

  because one of them one of those people [TS]

  this is an interesting thought [TS]

  experiment because because one of those [TS]

  people with this is a Heisenberg type [TS]

  situation we don't know which it is but [TS]

  for now we are in this experiment all we [TS]

  know is that one of those people is a is [TS]

  is is dangerous in a way in that they [TS]

  are inept or they're being a little [TS]

  ignorant but then eventually the [TS]

  fullness of time will learn that one of [TS]

  those people is a truly truly horrible [TS]

  monster [TS]

  mhm because they think they're helping [TS]

  they think there's ice called plan [TS]

  traffic cop that that's what's happening [TS]

  in this situation and so you know [TS]

  there's it stacks up right 56 people now [TS]

  behind these two cars and every person [TS]

  you can see them and i'm i'm hanging [TS]

  back right because I'm like look I have [TS]

  no dog in this race [TS]

  uh-huh I'm just puttering along a fit if [TS]

  I if I get to if I'm just going 40 all [TS]

  the way into the office i'm still going [TS]

  to be on time everything's fine so I'm [TS]

  hanging back I'm looking and I'm scoping [TS]

  around five or six cars pile up behind [TS]

  this little 22 person cluster fucked [TS]

  and they're so here's i'll give you all [TS]

  the evidence [TS]

  yeah because it's very confusing [TS]

  evidence for for a group of drivers the [TS]

  right-hand car is a lipstick colored [TS]

  toyota tercel call it a two thousand one [TS]

  to sell but it's like peach lipstick all [TS]

  right okay got that in your mind [TS]

  yeah which is that right later left lane [TS]

  that's right line ok left lane is a taxi [TS]

  but it's a minivan taxi and the entire [TS]

  back window is covered with stickers of [TS]

  various taxi authorization I mean the [TS]

  guy can you can't even see who's in it [TS]

  because it's get there's a bunch of jim [TS]

  jam on the back of the window so which [TS]

  one are you going to stack up behind [TS]

  which one do you think is the like just [TS]

  the slow-moving dangling never your [TS]

  River mirrors or which one is the one [TS]

  that's like I'm just checking my phone [TS]

  and then I'm gonna step on it when i see [TS]

  that i have created a problem and [TS]

  they're side by side long enough that [TS]

  you can immediately in this thought [TS]

  experiment pick out who's who [TS]

  all we've been going three we've gone [TS]

  three miles out here now with these two [TS]

  just you know just side-by-side by [TS]

  sometime [TS]

  uh-huh uh-huh and so what happens behind [TS]

  them go go ahead and when I was gonna [TS]

  say was and disclosure I feel a little [TS]

  bit like I'm going up against a sicilian [TS]

  when death is on the line because I [TS]

  think this might be a little bit of it [TS]

  turns out or double turns out see my [TS]

  feeling just from what you described [TS]

  before you got to the part about the gym [TS]

  on the taxi window is I was pretty sure [TS]

  that the lipstick was the mirror [TS]

  dingaling maybe have maybe had his or [TS]

  her reasons and then a second whoever's [TS]

  to be in the left lane is clearly the [TS]

  dick because the dick chooses the left [TS]

  lane plays traffic cop but now this is [TS]

  where you go up against a sicilian is [TS]

  now thinking wow that's interesting [TS]

  because that person's a livelihood is on [TS]

  the line but how quickly they get from [TS]

  here to there [TS]

  but I'm gonna triple turns out and say [TS]

  i'm gonna guess the taxi person was the [TS]

  dangling the true the trooper jingling [TS]

  the true like like a lift up the blight [TS]

  on society oblivious rather than [TS]

  checking the phone around [TS]

  yeah what like what will full dumb [TS]

  fuckery like I'm this is my legs like [TS]

  the people on public transit who act [TS]

  like seats were reserved for them [TS]

  mm like people who don't know how to be [TS]

  around other people people who don't [TS]

  have to wait in a line people who think [TS]

  that wherever they go they have a four [TS]

  foot diameter bubble that should give [TS]

  them that's the universe that's a [TS]

  contained universe it'sit's their own [TS]

  personal public cosmology [TS]

  yeah well so what happens is the the [TS]

  other traffic that's now like you know [TS]

  eddying behind this log jam [TS]

  they all make kind of the they make the [TS]

  first determination like you initially [TS]

  did which is lipstick color tercel has [TS]

  got to be some kind of oblivious mom [TS]

  some sort of somebody that's just never [TS]

  going to know that's not aware of their [TS]

  surroundings [TS]

  the government also be let's be a little [TS]

  bit harder and that's that's not a [TS]

  recent car even maybe that's somebody [TS]

  who's worried they're gonna be running [TS]

  out of gas think maybe they took the [TS]

  accidentally took the wrong vitamins and [TS]

  now they're all hopped up on goofballs [TS]

  and it's it's a clean car and it's [TS]

  moving very reliably and steadily [TS]

  there's no weaving of did you get a [TS]

  sense of the age the lipstick driver [TS]

  I don't want to be a gist can't see [TS]

  anything ok that reads a little bit as [TS]

  retiree can't see anything in either [TS]

  direction so it's yours so everybody's [TS]

  trying to make this decision themselves [TS]

  and it's gonna be taught in colleges for [TS]

  years by the way every single person [TS]

  lines up behind the cab because they [TS]

  figured that's where the whole can open [TS]

  the hole is going to open behind the cab [TS]

  right the cabin figured out the cab's [TS]

  gonna get a call the cab is gonna step [TS]

  on the gas [TS]

  the cab is where the where the opening [TS]

  is going to happen and as happens so [TS]

  often in these situations just the [TS]

  mirror pressure i don't even I'm not [TS]

  even sure the cabbie looked behind [TS]

  but just the pressure of six people [TS]

  piling up behind you sometimes will have [TS]

  the effect of pushing the obstruction [TS]

  just pushing the pushing the lemmiwinks [TS]

  see I said drafting i was writing your [TS]

  cutter your cutter by corrupting the [TS]

  Italian right behind a truck in a draft [TS]

  if I understand what you're saying here [TS]

  is that I don't know the laws of [TS]

  thermodynamics but i think what you're [TS]

  saying is that you get enough cars [TS]

  behind it produces a forward draft that [TS]

  should let that person know it's this [TS]

  time to set the step aside [TS]

  that's why we call her push draft draft [TS]

  ok so that the cab starts to move and [TS]

  you can feel everyone behind rejoice [TS]

  like here we go [TS]

  we made the right call a cab starting to [TS]

  move be this whole thing is going to [TS]

  open up I'm gonna be on 55 miles an hour [TS]

  here in the in in you know they've got [TS]

  their to get there [TS]

  gmt watches and they're setting the [TS]

  bezel and it's coming right [TS]

  they had another 30 seconds to wait this [TS]

  long jam and then and I'm and as they go [TS]

  by the lipstick car they're all going to [TS]

  look down into the car and whatever [TS]

  their suspicion is will be confirmed [TS]

  about that person is either be an old [TS]

  lady or it's going to be you know some [TS]

  college student with the with it [TS]

  anti-reflection sunglasses or whatever [TS]

  it's going to be like the cab pulls [TS]

  ahead pulls ahead a brown like a ford [TS]

  probe is first in line slots into the [TS]

  space the cab moves ahead and now almost [TS]

  the probe is ready to make the move [TS]

  here's the lipstick cars holding very [TS]

  constant speed it's very exciting how [TS]

  reliably that lipstick her cell is [TS]

  maintaining 40 miles an hour exactly the [TS]

  cab finally clears the line where the [TS]

  probe can pop over the probe pops over [TS]

  and immediately stops accelerating so [TS]

  the [TS]

  the probe was and it was a revenge pass [TS]

  the probe clear the gap and then pulled [TS]

  up and now the probe is going the same [TS]

  speed as the cab and they are neck and [TS]

  neck and with the with the lipstick are [TS]

  now behind the pro oh my goodness I've [TS]

  never seen in nearly slowing their ranks [TS]

  at this point [TS]

  yeah the probe was like pushing pushing [TS]

  pushing like let me through let me [TS]

  through let me through and then got [TS]

  through and as soon as the probe had the [TS]

  open space the wide-open American space [TS]

  in front of his headlights he was [TS]

  satisfied he'd gotten gotten all he [TS]

  needed [TS]

  oh I've seen this I've seen this happen [TS]

  it was and then oh my goodness you at [TS]

  the now 67 cars that had that had been [TS]

  patiently waiting to the thread that [TS]

  needle [TS]

  Wow can you man can you imagine so I was [TS]

  super glad to be hanging back as a [TS]

  passive observer [TS]

  uh-huh but then the entire rest of the [TS]

  way in to town [TS]

  it was just one person after another was [TS]

  trading it was like there was a baton of [TS]

  stupid and they were just passing this [TS]

  baton of stupid back and forth and I [TS]

  just got into the office was like happy [TS]

  to be here [TS]

  happy to be here that was kind of [TS]

  satisfying I know one thing about a [TS]

  putana stupid is a dropping it doesn't [TS]

  mean you've lost or won it just means [TS]

  you're still stupid all right [TS]

  the race is not stopped because you [TS]

  dropped the baton that's the nature of [TS]

  the baton stupid race if you touch it [TS]

  that stupid is imparted to you and you [TS]

  can't get it's not just like it's not [TS]

  just like a magic cards thrown out of [TS]

  your sleeves and you're just trying to [TS]

  flip him away he can't get rid of those [TS]

  cards keeps producing fans John Roderick [TS]

  you gotta tell you what happened with [TS]

  the Heisenberg cat so what was what was [TS]

  it was it was a self-driving lipstick [TS]

  car [TS]

  oh no so by the time I got around the [TS]

  lipstick car [TS]

  I mean it was a 45 year old asian woman [TS]

  oh hmm i'll cut that out [TS]

  presented without comment yep yep it [TS]

  anyway glad you made it in art could be [TS]

  more push drafts you know what I've done [TS]

  that I've done the revenge pass and I'm [TS]

  not proud of it [TS]

  I used to be a small person and I would [TS]

  do a revenge pass [TS]

  yeah anymore if you're talking about [TS]

  right yeah I'm going down I'm going down [TS]

  i-75 somebody's not driving to my [TS]

  satisfaction or arm i go past them [TS]

  I get in front of them and then I go one [TS]

  mile an hour slower than we're going up [TS]

  that's terrible it's the worst what was [TS]

  like what what was I attempting to solve [TS]

  with that uh yeah I know I a guy did [TS]

  that to me the other day where I was I'm [TS]

  trying to thread a needle right or it's [TS]

  like somebody's in the somebody's [TS]

  somebody in the left lane decides to put [TS]

  on their turn signal just as they slam [TS]

  on their brakes to make a left turn you [TS]

  know it's one of those people that's [TS]

  just like all I just want you to I want [TS]

  your tires to go flat you just everybody [TS]

  behind you is trying to figure something [TS]

  out and then you're like I'm turning [TS]

  lifetime and so I am already in the [TS]

  right lane I'm not affected by this [TS]

  person but behind them is one of those [TS]

  dodge jacked up 26 hundreds with giant [TS]

  Colburn and pipes and the pie company [TS]

  the guy in the truck is bald with [TS]

  sunglasses on the back of his head I've [TS]

  seen I I said that guy and he's if he's [TS]

  not a member of the nra that his dad was [TS]

  and they weren't based on short pants [TS]

  Jones got short pants on for sure who [TS]

  and he didn't cheat able to teach and he [TS]

  does he's exactly has a go-to he's got [TS]

  he's got some he's got some glasses that [TS]

  you might have one pair on his nose [TS]

  covers eyes get another on the back of [TS]

  his neck he's got another pair croakies [TS]

  that's right right right and and you [TS]

  know like it don't tread on me flag [TS]

  somewhere that's right and he thinks [TS]

  that he's gonna just it's not not change [TS]

  his forward momentum at all except to [TS]

  just wait [TS]

  Eve over into the right lane real fast [TS]

  he's even though his truck is 45 feet [TS]

  long he's just weave over there real [TS]

  fast the weave back but i'm already in [TS]

  that space [TS]

  I'm not doing anything wrong I'm just [TS]

  traveling the constant speed but i'm in [TS]

  that space already and so he's gotta [TS]

  slam on his brakes but now it's my fault [TS]

  somehow you can see it in the way that [TS]

  you can see it in its head Bob as i go [TS]

  past him I'm not looking at me when I [TS]

  can see his I can see his little tantrum [TS]

  who because it didn't work out the way [TS]

  he planned that guy's whole life is a [TS]

  jama it's fucking jam up you can tell [TS]

  you can tell he he hasn't been satisfied [TS]

  with anything in your all the metamucil [TS]

  in the world [TS]

  mhm is not going to clean this guy so [TS]

  I'm driving along to my mind my own [TS]

  business and a minute later he comes by [TS]

  me why you know just haulin ass by me [TS]

  pulls over in front of me and slams on [TS]

  his brakes and he pulled over right in [TS]

  front of me so that I didn't so that I [TS]

  had to I had to break you know I didn't [TS]

  even have the option of like not [TS]

  affected by you you know go ahead and do [TS]

  your do dumb thing or like if I had if I [TS]

  had anticipated it right just as he [TS]

  pulled over in front of me I could [TS]

  weaved him like I could I could dodged [TS]

  him bobbed and weaved but I didn't I was [TS]

  just driving along just looking at the [TS]

  birds and so he got me with that I was I [TS]

  was punished [TS]

  I was punished for having been some you [TS]

  know some some dummy in his way [TS]

  yeah he had his life is probably filled [TS]

  with dummies that he is aware need to be [TS]

  fixed and then he's constantly [TS]

  discovering new dams I'm not sure we're [TS]

  doing anything entirely different except [TS]

  i think i think we're in the right out [TS]

  for sure [TS]

  well because we have a podcast we got a [TS]

  podcast we understand the importance to [TS]

  c @c this isn't such as this is the [TS]

  original Roderick online discussion but [TS]

  it is it is shot through everything that [TS]

  we do today is keep moving it out of the [TS]

  way like it's not a bit it so it is is [TS]

  literally a way of life and I mean I [TS]

  think a lot of people that like that [TS]

  it's catchy [TS]

  it's become America's favorite [TS]

  catchphrase [TS]

  but I think what people forget i want to [TS]

  point out two things that those just [TS]

  review a little bit if if you don't mind [TS]

  no no go back number one I want you to [TS]

  really remember it's keep moving and get [TS]

  out of the way and get out ok so if [TS]

  you're at the real novice level of this [TS]

  if you give you just understanding that [TS]

  you should keep moving or get out of the [TS]

  way is not bad but that you have not [TS]

  really reached the boss level yet like [TS]

  we're talking about what you need to be [TS]

  doing is you need to keep moving and get [TS]

  out of the way now here's the other [TS]

  thing I don't understand you're not [TS]

  being mean when you're keeping moving [TS]

  and keeping getting out of the way [TS]

  moving out of the way you're helping [TS]

  people you're helping people if we all [TS]

  found a way to do both of those things [TS]

  all the time everything will get better [TS]

  everybody would be helping everybody you [TS]

  know if every libertarian who nominally [TS]

  agrees with that statement in the way [TS]

  that they do everything they do if every [TS]

  libertarian would actually adopt keep [TS]

  moving and get out of the way I think [TS]

  they would have more credibility [TS]

  well they'd be moving for one and they'd [TS]

  be out of my way for another see it [TS]

  helps everybody i do feel like you know [TS]

  what we talked a lot about about how we [TS]

  are trying to help people on this [TS]

  program but we're really trying to do is [TS]

  empower people to help people [TS]

  uh-oh you're right we're training the [TS]

  trainers we are that's exactly right we [TS]

  are helping people help people and one [TS]

  of the ways one of the prime ways is [TS]

  well the prime way obviously is hashtag [TS]

  supertrain but one of the prime ways is [TS]

  teaching people to teach people to keep [TS]

  moving economical it's kinda like the [TS]

  world's least financially successful [TS]

  pyramid scheme [TS]

  no that's Alcoholics Anonymous this [TS]

  episode of rock on the line is brought [TS]

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  remember going to get that first fifty [TS]

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  people [TS]

  braintree payments calm / supertrain our [TS]

  thanks to braintree for supporting [TS]

  Roderick analyze what up the front money [TS]

  make money stuffing envelopes ask me how [TS]

  hi John problem would keep moving and [TS]

  get out of the way has a teaching [TS]

  strategy is that you want to this was [TS]

  the most frustrating that you want it [TS]

  you want other people to learn by [TS]

  example you want to show them hey look [TS]

  here I go [TS]

  I'm out of your way and still moving [TS]

  uh-huh the prop people refuse to learn [TS]

  right they they are not if they are [TS]

  already in the way then they are [TS]

  presumably not watching to see a better [TS]

  way and so this is why I feel like it [TS]

  should be part of the driver's exam it [TS]

  should be part of the the ongoing [TS]

  education of everybody because it gets [TS]

  to something really important and it has [TS]

  something to do with what you described [TS]

  earlier about having a jam up and push [TS]

  draft little bit a little bit of Baton [TS]

  stupid thrown in which is there are [TS]

  people who are constantly seeking [TS]

  redress for something that happened in [TS]

  the past and that is being acted out and [TS]

  how they drive 40 fucking miles per hour [TS]

  in the passing lane it's not the fast [TS]

  lane you guys the passing lane me [TS]

  hang out there don't eat your lunch no [TS]

  you're not don't fast no don't snap your [TS]

  chat you move keep moving right but i [TS]

  think i think this is the thing and and [TS]

  if any of these people behaved and some [TS]

  of them probably do behave this way but [TS]

  if they behaved in the execrable way [TS]

  that they are behaving in their [TS]

  automobile on johns road if they behave [TS]

  that way in line at target poo imagine [TS]

  would get eaten alive with me i hope so [TS]

  but it out my goodness their bones would [TS]

  be spit out into the parking [TS]

  oh I feel like this is I mean back to [TS]

  the UFOs I don't wanna I don't want to [TS]

  recapitulate every single one of our [TS]

  projects i think if we only do it every [TS]

  few episodes people will get comfortable [TS]

  with it and it won't seem as jarring and [TS]

  will be in that sweet spot between I [TS]

  rolling and oh my god [TS]

  but so you know don't you that Hillary [TS]

  Clinton has promised if elected she may [TS]

  have said when elected but let's say if [TS]

  elected Hillary is going to get to the [TS]

  bottom of area 51 understanding i don't [TS]

  remember the exact quote but it's my [TS]

  understanding that in addressing the UFO [TS]

  people she not only she didn't do her [TS]

  usual yes I enjoy earth sports haha name [TS]

  of game she actually used like an info [TS]

  community like term of art isn't right [TS]

  she didn't say who photo she's there [TS]

  like a new word for like the the [TS]

  chemtrail insiders with the first what's [TS]

  the new term well let's not talk about [TS]

  it here [TS]

  alright but you don't say I guess I'm [TS]

  trying to say is if i remember correctly [TS]

  when asked about this she did not [TS]

  hesitate she answered it is alarmingly [TS]

  in an alarmingly forthright way and [TS]

  actually threw in a little bit of inside [TS]

  language she used the anko Truffaut [TS]

  people let me go one better i think [TS]

  Hillary started talking about it without [TS]

  being asked [TS]

  ah prompted the discussion that wasn't [TS]

  even a chuckle no no she's she was not a [TS]

  she was not up mollifying some kook with [TS]

  by using their inside language she was [TS]

  shouting herself as an info person like [TS]

  an info truther [TS]

  she's a new folder and she said when [TS]

  elected I will and then just you know [TS]

  went down a list of of dog whistles for [TS]

  proof of people and you know all across [TS]

  America there was an earthquake [TS]

  we're all these people came up about you [TS]

  know they turn their shortwave radios [TS]

  off and ran up into the light and said [TS]

  finally [TS]

  but she's she's dead serious and and it [TS]

  caused me to reflect on the fact that [TS]

  her husband was president for eight [TS]

  years you would think oh she cared about [TS]

  it this much that they would have had [TS]

  the opportunity but if you're married to [TS]

  Bill Clinton and you got to keep it [TS]

  civil [TS]

  you're gonna want to have just a whole [TS]

  bunch of things you don't talk about and [TS]

  you would be thinking how wonderful [TS]

  would be to have something you could [TS]

  talk about with your husband the [TS]

  President that wasn't about him [TS]

  Duncan somebody and maybe maybe she [TS]

  brings up a dinner one night maybe [TS]

  things were getting a little chilly [TS]

  she's like so what's the deal with that [TS]

  thing and he wants to mollify her by [TS]

  saying oh yes well you know I can't say [TS]

  too much obviously cuz i'm the president [TS]

  stuff right right yes we're going with [TS]

  this like she must you must you must [TS]

  have had some briefings things have [TS]

  happened he got he got awaken them in [TS]

  the middle of night because something [TS]

  was happening in Arizona or whatever [TS]

  raise had some briefings you know he's [TS]

  had some briefing he's been down to see [TS]

  what his name bing-bong what's-his-name [TS]

  clip he's seen as he seems liebler know [TS]

  but pc where Clark has kept if he wanted [TS]

  to know the answers about bleep blorp is [TS]

  really have a good click clock it's [TS]

  bleep blop up if good if you very much [TS]

  for the chemtrails I used to remember [TS]

  things better [TS]

  the thing is it's not just clip clop I'm [TS]

  sure there's a good floor up to [TS]

  so let's let's talk about him bleep [TS]

  blorp he's the tall hi-c this is like [TS]

  this is how like the woman is the first [TS]

  Rolling Stone me right there are gonna [TS]

  take you straight to glee club because [TS]

  he is what he is is it well here's the [TS]

  thing click what is a for gaseous rape [TS]

  and character you do not want to meet [TS]

  him first you wanna meet this little guy [TS]

  who looks like something by for your kid [TS]

  six flags [TS]

  hello please the president you should we [TS]

  pop is just the he's the bartender right [TS]

  not the floor is the one in the back [TS]

  room [TS]

  yeah but my sense of what Hilary is [TS]

  saying he's he's the Eldridge character [TS]

  that is contained in a very special [TS]

  special facility that one thing is an [TS]

  alien nomenclature right gleep is the is [TS]

  the patronymic i think that the phylum [TS]

  what is that [TS]

  well they're offering them they're all [TS]

  gleep it's like in its like in Korea you [TS]

  know they're all they're all Kimbo [TS]

  things all the way down yeah but then [TS]

  they're less than their their last name [TS]

  is a person I got it I got it [TS]

  i but i but my sense of what hillary was [TS]

  saying is that her husband former [TS]

  President Clinton wasn't that interested [TS]

  and so they gave him the briefing but [TS]

  you know president gets a lot of [TS]

  briefings they're like all mr. president [TS]

  you know come into this room we're gonna [TS]

  talk for a minute about gleep glop & [TS]

  gleep glorp the president's like yes [TS]

  well interesting thanks for the heads up [TS]

  he basically appears interested in [TS]

  things for a living that's a president's [TS]

  job and and he was more he was more [TS]

  interested at that point in time in [TS]

  juicing the economy with his vaguely [TS]

  neoliberal policies [TS]

  yeah and he was not interested in [TS]

  getting to the bottom of the one world [TS]

  government that lives beneath the polar [TS]

  ice caps right and that I think you can [TS]

  just tell [TS]

  right thats a press conference didn't [TS]

  want to have yeah you just tell by [TS]

  looking at the guy is this guy [TS]

  interested in getting to the bottom of [TS]

  the one world government controlled by [TS]

  ufos no but his wife is and she was [TS]

  biding her time potentially by [TS]

  dinnertime this whole time to get into [TS]

  that hot seat and i think if you look at [TS]

  the other candidates for president all [TS]

  of them include if we go all the way [TS]

  back a year from a year ago [TS]

  look at all those candidates for [TS]

  president and then you then you apply [TS]

  the transparency of who is going to get [TS]

  to the bottom [TS]

  who's going to go to area 51 go down the [TS]

  forty four flights of elevator into [TS]

  into the kingdom salt cavern and [TS]

  actually face-to-face talk with clip [TS]

  clop yeah and click Laura talked to clip [TS]

  clop get a drink tom anyclip you [TS]

  interact with click it talk bleep blop [TS]

  get a drink go through the curtains and [TS]

  then gleep glorp to be wrong [TS]

  yeah he pretends to be your father and [TS]

  he talked to you in a lot of following [TS]

  flower like a contact that you can [TS]

  understand but this is why Ted Cruz was [TS]

  so I don't want to go with the obvious [TS]

  here but then he's obviously an alien [TS]

  meet back just just from the [TS]

  perspiration III but this is you know a [TS]

  lady doth protest too much like he's not [TS]

  gonna wanna I'm not gonna help me with [TS]

  the top because that's you know little [TS]

  on the nose because whatever equipment [TS]

  goes ah bleep clunk I finally met the [TS]

  finally here right and then then fix a [TS]

  little hose into him and sucks all the [TS]

  meat out of that he's just a bag of skin [TS]

  so I'm very excited about this as a as a [TS]

  UFO truther [TS]

  yeah because you know are our chances [TS]

  have improved at least about about about [TS]

  somebody Oh pre-opening project blue [TS]

  book and saying this can't all have been [TS]

  swamp gas [TS]

  let's read let's get to the bottom of [TS]

  this again we've got into the it's like [TS]

  the Kennedy assassination we've got to [TS]

  the bottom of it already for that having [TS]

  a car John I'm gonna I'm gonna pause [TS]

  pause here let's take let's let's take [TS]

  this whole discussion how everything [TS]

  later but well that right there for the [TS]

  hell of it because this is too sensitive [TS]

  this is too sensitive stuff but i'm [TS]

  laying the groundwork with you okay are [TS]

  able to talk about this later because my [TS]

  sense is that when this all goes down [TS]

  yeah and when the UFOs say ok the the [TS]

  jig is up right we've been we've been a [TS]

  we've been designing frozen dolls for a [TS]

  long time right we've been making a lot [TS]

  of movies about UFOs because the roofers [TS]

  control Hollywood children like ice and [TS]

  singing look at big eyes on the ball [TS]

  I just keep getting bigger don't [TS]

  very pretty very pretty big eyes very [TS]

  pretty when that what all of this is [TS]

  laying the groundwork right for the big [TS]

  reveal [TS]

  one day it's gonna be like oh and [TS]

  they're not gonna do it like oh it's [TS]

  been here all along haha [TS]

  we're just kidding it's gonna be the big [TS]

  reveal is gonna be like we never knew [TS]

  about them before but here they finally [TS]

  are like they did finally arrived maybe [TS]

  they've been here poking farmers in the [TS]

  butt a little bit huh [TS]

  but we weren't the government was we [TS]

  weren't aware of it [TS]

  remember all those times that the Air [TS]

  Force was like we saw something on the [TS]

  radar but it could we did we never found [TS]

  it so it couldn't have existed the air [TS]

  force was duped to the UFOs are finally [TS]

  here and it's going to be a big surprise [TS]

  all the kids are going to welcome them [TS]

  because they're gonna look like frozen [TS]

  dolls [TS]

  yeah but so when this happens right how [TS]

  how do you picture it happening what's [TS]

  the first what happens that first moment [TS]

  when you're like what their the aliens [TS]

  are real but what's what's what's your [TS]

  first you wake up that day you wake up [TS]

  tuesday morning what happens what's the [TS]

  first thing that happens I so you you're [TS]

  saying but let me let me get this clear [TS]

  and we're gonna cut all this out anyway [TS]

  but for example to go hey you know what [TS]

  guess what [TS]

  it turns out there is a certain kind of [TS]

  moisture on Mars that shows us that it [TS]

  is far from impossible that there's some [TS]

  kind of life there but like you know [TS]

  what you feed them a little bit at a [TS]

  time little bit at a time little bit at [TS]

  a time right and we say life on Mars [TS]

  like oh no it's not gonna be a biped [TS]

  right it's not it's going to be [TS]

  something put closer to like what we [TS]

  think of on earth as bacteria probably [TS]

  right sorts of its own [TS]

  it's a mold but yeah that's the kind of [TS]

  thing you talk about historically you [TS]

  dribble that out a little bit [TS]

  notwithstanding but probes you are you [TS]

  dribble that out a little bit you're [TS]

  seeing on this day incontrovertibly like [TS]

  nobody is [TS]

  nobody in the White House is denying [TS]

  that we definitely got an alien [TS]

  let's call it let's call it that the [TS]

  they don't necessarily need to be [TS]

  bipedal but let's say that there's let [TS]

  it's the day that intelligent life is [TS]

  revealed incontrovertibly I mean I mean [TS]

  for most people think they are here and [TS]

  they are queer by any definition now [TS]

  part 3 begins we gotta get used to it [TS]

  get used to get used to it [TS]

  how's that revealed to you on that day [TS]

  if it's jam up i think it begins [TS]

  it's got to be a little bit planet of [TS]

  the apes like that thing gets discovered [TS]

  in isolation and it allows them to have [TS]

  plausible deniability for all the things [TS]

  they've been covering up for hundreds of [TS]

  years [TS]

  so you're saying that they find an [TS]

  obelisk that might be an obelisk or or [TS]

  it might be like lots of little kids toy [TS]

  they find something that doesn't prove [TS]

  it [TS]

  you're saying there's an [TS]

  incontrovertible you're saying tucker [TS]

  carlson can actually talk to an alien on [TS]

  the TV [TS]

  yeah my suspicion is that the way it has [TS]

  to happen is the way that it happens [TS]

  fairly often in movies because the way [TS]

  the way it happens in movies right now [TS]

  these movies are produced by Koufos who [TS]

  are walking around in they live style [TS]

  face masks in Hollywood interacting with [TS]

  rowdy roddy roddy piper yeah and they [TS]

  come on over [TS]

  Rowdy Roddy Piper's in a movie really i [TS]

  mean let's really think about that for a [TS]

  minute you know you know his executive [TS]

  producing a you know a lot of those [TS]

  films like John Carpenter movies writ [TS]

  large have to find out for years years [TS]

  there's an executive producing credit [TS]

  that has been left off of life gleep [TS]

  glop let's just say what it is but he [TS]

  probably used the pseudonym like like [TS]

  you know making Keith what happens in a [TS]

  lot of those films everybody wakes up [TS]

  one morning and there's a giant [TS]

  spaceship hovering over every major city [TS]

  mm right because it's not you don't want [TS]

  a giant spaceship just hovering over st. [TS]

  louis missouri real you mean you're [TS]

  talking about like an Independence Day [TS]

  or district nine there's like a giant [TS]

  flying saucer-like looming over on [TS]

  metropolis [TS]

  yeah and it and even this is the thing [TS]

  it's usually a giant flying saucer in [TS]

  those films and I think that's probably [TS]

  and I think that's that [TS]

  how [TS]

  would be foes sort of overselling a [TS]

  little bit because really if it was just [TS]

  now forget is it was just like a [TS]

  four-passenger one was a tiny little [TS]

  spaceship he'll still have the same it's [TS]

  much more plausible if we learn that six [TS]

  percent of what we previously thought [TS]

  were mosquitoes are actually alien [TS]

  vessels right that makes so much more [TS]

  sense where they would come in go here [TS]

  so that we can get away with what you're [TS]

  talking about basically like you know [TS]

  taking a battleship into the middle of [TS]

  Manhattan like it's gonna do that notion [TS]

  that seems like eating anybody's gonna [TS]

  know even or especially especially [TS]

  photos they're gonna know that that's [TS]

  going to put people off the beer a [TS]

  little bit I at if we can revisit story [TS]

  I told a long time ago where during [TS]

  certain part of my life I believed that [TS]

  if the UFOs wanted to camouflage [TS]

  themselves huh [TS]

  they would do it by turning their [TS]

  spaceships into 727 yeah of course there [TS]

  aren't any 727 anymore but is that scene [TS]

  where they just showed up at the airport [TS]

  right yeah i mean a certain number of [TS]

  trained spotters would be like wait a [TS]

  minute what the hell where the 727 is [TS]

  coming from but in baked with Pan Am on [TS]

  the tail big we are definitely on [TS]

  planning [TS]

  hello fellow earth pilots I mean pilots [TS]

  but if they were 737 right here there's [TS]

  737 everywhere [TS]

  look up look out your window right now [TS]

  you'll see a 732 from here billion [TS]

  chemtrails so if there was you bet your [TS]

  booty they are but if a 737 let's say [TS]

  there's 737 on approach to every major [TS]

  airport in the country and it just stops [TS]

  moving forward and just goes into a [TS]

  hover right that would send a powerful [TS]

  message to everybody because you know [TS]

  all everywhere you went you could look [TS]

  up and there would be a 737 just not [TS]

  moving that would that would be powerful [TS]

  evidence of something and that would be [TS]

  a great way to say ding dong [TS]

  who's at the door oh hello it's [TS]

  clip-clop yeah here with some tasty [TS]

  earth drinks [TS]

  hmm so the next thing that happens [TS]

  because everybody's looking up at the [TS]

  and make it look like a four loko that's [TS]

  hard to get right shirt or the old-style [TS]

  four lokos [TS]

  that's one reason yeah you can even get [TS]

  these anymore because makes people [TS]

  insane and they'd be like oh my god [TS]

  that's so cool i love the aliens [TS]

  well but they have everyone's looking up [TS]

  that 737 is a very familiar shape so the [TS]

  only thing that's weird right now is [TS]

  that they aren't moving [TS]

  yeah and I'm not saying every 737 lots [TS]

  of them are still taking off and landing [TS]

  it's just this one it's just one outside [TS]

  of every Airport just hovering so [TS]

  unclear what's going on but this is [TS]

  priming the pump all around the world [TS]

  this is happening in in mumbai it's [TS]

  happening in a bottle bad who everywhere [TS]

  huh [TS]

  then they then they come on the airwaves [TS]

  okay all right right and that not [TS]

  everybody has terrestrial to happen [TS]

  pretty quickly because I my concern here [TS]

  i'm keeping mom about this [TS]

  my concern is if if they if the 737 they [TS]

  start hanging in midair and there's time [TS]

  to speculate there's gonna be a lot of [TS]

  lunatics you don't understand those are [TS]

  probably UFOs going to move the kind of [TS]

  crazy theories if you got to get the [TS]

  press pretty quick [TS]

  the club's gotta get on the horn and [TS]

  start talking about hell i bring you [TS]

  cancer treatment or something [TS]

  well what's going you know at first it [TS]

  is the the Air Force ends up their Jets [TS]

  but they realize that their Jets are not [TS]

  very useful because the 737 are immobile [TS]

  right so they're flying around them in [TS]

  sin f-16s but that's a ballsy are our [TS]

  earth planes can't hover right that's [TS]

  part of the problem Sophie starts going [TS]

  700 miles an hour we're good to go right [TS]

  but if they're if they're just hanging [TS]

  out over you know richmond virginia we [TS]

  don't want to be buzzin and strengthen [TS]

  sure so they send helicopters or Ospreys [TS]

  or whatever they're currently carrier [TS]

  john abbott harriers going to reuse a [TS]

  lot of gas really alright yeah they send [TS]

  up some you know some Apaches let's say [TS]

  some Cobra mmm [TS]

  and the helicopters flying around but [TS]

  there's no this is the thing about an [TS]

  immobile 737 it's no threat to anybody [TS]

  there's no weaponry on it yeah it's [TS]

  maybe it's full of people so you're can [TS]

  communicate with it writes and they [TS]

  don't want to just flat-out attack [TS]

  because you could have much babies on [TS]

  their yeah you can shoot it down it's a [TS]

  it's a it's an airliner alright alright [TS]

  so the helicopters flying around trying [TS]

  to look in the windows they can't it's [TS]

  like what the hell but you know you [TS]

  can't take an aggressive stance and all [TS]

  the conspiracy theories your you bet [TS]

  they're they're online saying what they [TS]

  think it is it's a it's a that cross [TS]

  temporal reality Muslim seem could be [TS]

  Muslims him so you let your advice to [TS]

  for a day and then they come on the air [TS]

  and and what happens when they come on [TS]

  the air they're broadcasting you know [TS]

  it's on the internet but it's also on [TS]

  televisions all around the world and [TS]

  it's the alien spokesperson who is me [TS]

  the emissary the emissary they've [TS]

  contacted me see greetings earth [TS]

  hello you might be familiar with my [TS]

  podcast hello earth [TS]

  I am a friendly fellow earthling who my [TS]

  voice is being simultaneously translated [TS]

  into all the languages of the world and [TS]

  so is the cliq not weird so I appear to [TS]

  be speaking to you in Farsi or you know [TS]

  in tagalog who but yeah but I am just a [TS]

  you know i'm just an American and the [TS]

  reason they chose me is just that I was [TS]

  the obvious choice they're monitoring [TS]

  all human beings and they pick the one [TS]

  that would be best at this job and so [TS]

  I'm here to put a human face on this [TS]

  experience now I'm not here to advocate [TS]

  for them or be it or put a human face on [TS]

  the UFOs because I'm as curious as you [TS]

  but I'm here to moderate the experience [TS]

  i am the let's call me the anchorman [TS]

  over and and in future generations like [TS]

  a thousand years from now that's how [TS]

  he'll be remembered right all heezy the [TS]

  original anchorman the anchorman [TS]

  well they want it there will you be the [TS]

  anchor man it's like Madonna [TS]

  OIC goddamn on him yeah the anchorman [TS]

  yeah increment and actually this is a [TS]

  fucking tremendous screenplay and I went [TS]

  out for you right now I'm i got some [TS]

  notes for it yeah let's get going [TS]

  the anchorman the Act the anchorman and [TS]

  I'm just having the experience in real [TS]

  time along with everybody else like [TS]

  let's lay out what we know so far i'm on [TS]

  TV so that right there is pretty [TS]

  exceptional yeah this is this is an [TS]

  unusual day and it's not in the usual [TS]

  sense of reality show [TS]

  so the fact that most people have no [TS]

  idea who you are one somewhere yeah i [TS]

  mean it already seems weird that I'm on [TS]

  your that i'm not i'm speaking Tagalog [TS]

  yeah and there are 737 hovering above [TS]

  all major cities so i'm going to jump [TS]

  ahead and say this is a this is a this [TS]

  is a phenomenon that I bet has to do [TS]

  with UFOs and then as it unfolds i would [TS]

  just be walking everybody through it and [TS]

  at that point I'd be throwing in some [TS]

  keep moving and get out of the way [TS]

  science on people [TS]

  ok right because they won't let us teach [TS]

  it in the dmv's but this would be the [TS]

  moment this would be the moment that I [TS]

  could also be interjecting some life [TS]

  science into the whole experience for [TS]

  people so it's like we're going to be [TS]

  dealing with the new whole new reality [TS]

  planes hovering in the air dogs and cats [TS]

  sleeping together and one great way to [TS]

  do that would be to learn this simple [TS]

  tool we keep moving and get out of the [TS]

  way [TS]

  mhm [TS]

  so you really only need a couple things [TS]

  to change or happen [TS]

  I mean you know uh primarily what 3 i'm [TS]

  aware of we need for a UFO that's such [TS]

  an ugly word [TS]

  I know but we need for UFOs to exist we [TS]

  need for them to contact in groom you [TS]

  and then we need for them to come to [TS]

  earth in cold Plains and hover and then [TS]

  introduce you that this is this is the [TS]

  the route to keeping Galloway I feel [TS]

  like this is a better way to get the [TS]

  word out than to just you know populate [TS]

  podcast with it because there's a lot [TS]

  more people i mean people are listening [TS]

  to podcast more but there are a lot more [TS]

  people in various places that are [TS]

  searching the skies [TS]

  yeah you have to be on cereal for people [TS]

  to hear at huh yeah right right so or [TS]

  you know for this podcast would have to [TS]

  be about a murder [TS]

  oh sure King we could make this podcast [TS]

  about a murder [TS]

  there's a variety of ways we can do that [TS]

  but no I do feel like something I mean [TS]

  they're already communicating with me [TS]

  and they've already chosen me right so [TS]

  that and they're already here so all [TS]

  they need to do is do the next step [TS]

  which they're planning on doing which is [TS]

  what the big reveal when hillary [TS]

  clinton's president she's gonna go down [TS]

  in the elevator [TS]

  she's gonna meet clean floor he's going [TS]

  to say all right we're ready to first [TS]

  let me clip clop semi-gloss clip clop [TS]

  but she's gonna say show me your [TS]

  credentials he's gonna hand her a fizzy [TS]

  drink [TS]

  she's like right near the bartender so [TS]

  when she when she first meets clip-clop [TS]

  she's gonna go [TS]

  hey guys quit fucking around show me the [TS]

  real deal [TS]

  well maybe not i mean the first alien [TS]

  you meet your gonna be pretty impressed [TS]

  you're be like of course you're the [TS]

  president right because no one ever [TS]

  thinks oh no the first person you meet [TS]

  at the door is the doorman night and I [TS]

  was like she gets she goes down that [TS]

  that Air Force generals are all standing [TS]

  around there like this is clip-clop and [TS]

  she's like Hello nice to you know and [TS]

  hands are her diplomatic badges or [TS]

  whatever and flip-flops like would you [TS]

  like a a sex on the beach and monkey [TS]

  justy opens with its it's not a cure for [TS]

  cancer that's a little bit on the nose [TS]

  instead it is a refreshing drink maybe [TS]

  it's like the nicest actor she's ever [TS]

  had right and she looks around [TS]

  confused and the generals are like haha [TS]

  yeah no try it serious i have yet but [TS]

  but this is amazing right glee clubs on [TS]

  the other side of the curtain but I see [TS]

  all this I still this happening and when [TS]

  it does when it does and they look back [TS]

  and they go where the order the [TS]

  anchorman come from [TS]

  then there then all of this is all this [TS]

  is in the public record right they're [TS]

  gonna say the anchorman was talking [TS]

  about this a long time before it [TS]

  happened on his reward winning on his [TS]

  his phony award-winning that the [TS]

  Australian phonies [TS]

  yeah the phonies right yeah the final [TS]

  award winning pot gunrunner from the [TS]

  line [TS]

  yeah I don't know there's something you [TS]

  know I don't like to be a conspiracy [TS]

  theorist because you know what we who [TS]

  who really can run a conspiracy but [TS]

  there's another an alternate version of [TS]

  history in my mind you think about this [TS]

  you think about the what we currently [TS]

  called the first lady but let's call it [TS]

  the the first person i was the well [TS]

  technically be the second person but but [TS]

  the first person of the white house uh [TS]

  usually has a mission this is something [TS]

  you go back to ladybird wanted to clean [TS]

  up litter and beautify the highways [TS]

  michelle obama wants kids to move more [TS]

  and like get in shape [TS]

  Barbara Bush know what Barbara Bush [TS]

  Laura Bush was a former teacher she's [TS]

  all about literacy I can't tell USA [TS]

  today I don't remember [TS]

  Hillary Clinton having a thing but I [TS]

  want maybe she did that it doesn't [TS]

  really matter for the sake of this [TS]

  conversation here's what i'm trying to [TS]

  say she was in John she was in a [TS]

  situation for eight years where she had [TS]

  a lot of time she had a lot of stuff she [TS]

  could do [TS]

  she can't just say might have had a [TS]

  little pet project that wasn't quite so [TS]

  public so i'm not saying that you're not [TS]

  the anchorman because i think you could [TS]

  vary you probably will still be the [TS]

  anchor man but what if we're just in the [TS]

  second or third chapter of a much bigger [TS]

  story [TS]

  what if she's been working on this since [TS]

  1993 I think she probably have I think [TS]

  she has I think she's been laying the [TS]

  groundwork she's been getting to know [TS]

  people [TS]

  she's been figured out who she can trust [TS]

  because you know inside of any group i [TS]

  mean god this is certainly true in your [TS]

  band you can't trust anybody [TS]

  there's always gonna be somebody who got [TS]

  their own agenda like somebody's going [TS]

  to be the cigar-chomping [TS]

  general who wants to blow things up [TS]

  somebody else's the stupid liberal who [TS]

  doesn't know where I you know shoes with [TS]

  the with the toes on them right you [TS]

  gotta have those characters she's been [TS]

  working those channels all the way she [TS]

  might have been meeting with glee club [TS]

  for years now and click club now that [TS]

  she's the provisional emissary I think [TS]

  you become not just the emissary you be [TS]

  the anchor man becomes the public face [TS]

  well that's the best that's what I've [TS]

  always been saying I mean that maybe [TS]

  even contacting lots of people people [TS]

  they go oh come on no no you don't think [TS]

  so i might want to keep it closed system [TS]

  and I don't think Hillary's been I don't [TS]

  think I think that yes so you you're in [TS]

  with most of that except for working [TS]

  directly with clip clop i think that the [TS]

  groundwork she was laying in 93 that it [TS]

  contact with UFOs was her presidential [TS]

  fitness plan right maybe start getting [TS]

  onto it a little bitches all how about [TS]

  you get a single-payer card for [TS]

  insurance uh everybody freaks out pays [TS]

  attention to that don't look over here [TS]

  don't look over here don't look over [TS]

  here don't look over here at the cards [TS]

  that are pouring out of my sleeves he [TS]

  can't get rid of the cards and and what [TS]

  so what happens is though that we live [TS]

  in the an electoral democracy when [TS]

  Clinton leaves office as not like [TS]

  Hillary's still has the key to area 51 [TS]

  they take the key back [TS]

  she's been on the outside in like it [TS]

  isn't like she eventually got a job [TS]

  being the person who deals with heads of [TS]

  state of every country on Earth [TS]

  oh wait a minute she did well okay but [TS]

  that job is again the click the [TS]

  keyholder yes like like like thick the [TS]

  keymaster is just as a gatekeeper and [TS]

  the keymaster as far as we know the [TS]

  keymaster in the individual right hands [TS]

  and zool is click left no zool is Jules [TS]

  on the other side of bleep blorp we keep [TS]

  talking about Lee my singing actually [TS]

  there's a third UFO called zool that's [TS]

  that's that's less than a guess is he's [TS]

  on the other side of the floor because [TS]

  that's the thing you get into glee club [TS]

  like oh he's the big shot but now he's [TS]

  just [TS]

  you're so not results mean zoo is like [TS]

  meeting a memory when it would be so [TS]

  weird if you meet so you going to get a [TS]

  drink like the best cleanup takes your [TS]

  sweet ass daiquiri you go your show your [TS]

  diplomatic protection plan your glass [TS]

  mask and go behind the curtain me clear [TS]

  / and then driving cattle into hit looks [TS]

  like part of them out then there's a [TS]

  light coming from your refrigerator you [TS]

  open the door there's a staircase and [TS]

  you go up and meet for you it's casual [TS]

  okay the point is yes clearly Quinn has [TS]

  been the secretary of state but obama [TS]

  holds the key out he's lucky master [TS]

  George Bush had no idea that zool was [TS]

  even there they call me they probably [TS]

  tried to tell him so many times it's [TS]

  like the thing we're trying to get home [TS]

  and go into witness protection and he [TS]

  even after hours he still can't say [TS]

  Homer Thompson it's like that they SAT [TS]

  him down he's like a little kid become a [TS]

  bowl of cereal and a ball [TS]

  maybe some yarn to play with whatever [TS]

  like me mr. president like we really we [TS]

  really I can't tell you in very specific [TS]

  terms but once you listen super [TS]

  carefully to what I'm trying to tell you [TS]

  right now he knows it never was [TS]

  interested but change anymore lucky [TS]

  charms [TS]

  Jenny would go down there and he would [TS]

  gobble up whole cars sit down the heart [TS]

  crazy floor and maybe sharing the cows [TS]

  in there sort of if you know amorphis [TS]

  form so let's so in the Obama [TS]

  administration and he was like a [TS]

  jumpsuit when he goes down there is he [TS]

  in a suit who and when she goes down to [TS]

  talk with clip clop clip clop what you [TS]

  think this does he like did you have to [TS]

  wear anything special or do you have to [TS]

  do any special preparations I mean isn't [TS]

  a little presumptuous to assume that [TS]

  they can like breathe the same area at [TS]

  the same food i mean i understand we [TS]

  like daiquiris but like how would you [TS]

  prepare yourself as the vice president [TS]

  economy clock [TS]

  well this is I mean bleep blop you're [TS]

  gonna meet at the bar gleep glorp it [TS]

  sits on gleep glorp to breathe our air [TS]

  you know what I mean he's here on our [TS]

  planet right he is operating on such a [TS]

  different level that's like turning a [TS]

  dial for him that's like that's like [TS]

  switching from HBO showtime for him i [TS]

  will breathe your air except can't talk [TS]

  because he's an elder trigger well or [TS]

  heat maybe he's wearing like a up like a [TS]

  plastic raincoat like a [TS]

  the like the the replicant in Blade [TS]

  Runner except the plastic raincoat [TS]

  contains his gaseous form is gaseous [TS]

  form haha man right so changed but the [TS]

  thing about Cheney is here's what here's [TS]

  what we know about training he's [TS]

  ruthless who he's toothless boom but [TS]

  he's a he's a he's ultimately a dumb [TS]

  right he's no Hillary Clinton uh-huh and [TS]

  so he's there chatting it up eating [TS]

  eating whole cows with the floor [TS]

  thinking that's the end of the road and [TS]

  i'm pretty sure the air force general [TS]

  that you thinking it's more like it's [TS]

  more like hey this is cool I get to see [TS]

  Hamilton that kind of thing like he got [TS]

  a little special that day [TS]

  well that and and there this is the [TS]

  thing this is what is so hilarious about [TS]

  a clear corp is that he's having the [TS]

  time of his life negotiating with Air [TS]

  Force generals and dick cheney and [TS]

  saying like oh yeah totally [TS]

  we should totally do that and they're [TS]

  like all right well here's what we want [TS]

  to do you think it's like talking to a [TS]

  child is extremely serious about a [TS]

  pillow for oh that's so great we can do [TS]

  that [TS]

  yeah really good idea they're like we [TS]

  want to invade Iraq and get there you [TS]

  know and and use alien war technology to [TS]

  make war upon all these people and [TS]

  they're like sure the war was like yeah [TS]

  of course [TS]

  how about if we give you guys some [TS]

  stealth technology and they're like all [TS]

  stealth technology we've won but they're [TS]

  just dealing with the gaseous uh like [TS]

  guy at the front desk so clip it just [TS]

  kind of stringing them along like [TS]

  totally retreating like kids and saying [TS]

  like oh god what an impoverished [TS]

  imagination you have to think that the [TS]

  first thing when you when you meet a [TS]

  gaseous form inside of a raincoat who's [TS]

  account with you the first thing you [TS]

  think is do you have like do you have [TS]

  like our Lost Ark weapons [TS]

  this must be that must seem he must [TS]

  shake whatever if he had a head he would [TS]

  shake it [TS]

  gleep glorp is an idiot and write like [TS]

  us [TS]

  zool has put gleep glorp alcohol k as [TS]

  just like you for the first 50 years [TS]

  that were interacting these people [TS]

  they're not gonna be able to handle [TS]

  anything [TS]

  so I'm gonna put my like my totally [TS]

  idiotic brother-in-law out there at the [TS]

  front desk was an ad hoc receipt type [TS]

  situation yeah they're not going to get [TS]

  through this guy to me [TS]

  not for a while until i get somebody [TS]

  that's you know like look at Cheney [TS]

  right make sure Cheney if you if you [TS]

  study his body language and the way he [TS]

  talks he almost perfectly resembles [TS]

  vincent d'onofrio 'he's character in men [TS]

  in black one you put that guy in some [TS]

  overalls and put them on a porch [TS]

  I think it's gonna be indistinguishable [TS]

  right the same sort of has definitely a [TS]

  guy ticket Cheney is a guy who has a [TS]

  boat in a trailer right he's got some [TS]

  he's got some kind of farm that isn't [TS]

  doing as well as it did for his father [TS]

  right [TS]

  he's a cockroach inside of like a human [TS]

  skin inside of like I instead of vice [TS]

  president costume right yeah okay so [TS]

  what is kinda like a Dalek I get it okay [TS]

  we've been in touch ever since [TS]

  Eisenhower there's been some you know [TS]

  somebody in our government is [TS]

  interacting with the UFOs yeah but [TS]

  they're just giving they're just like [TS]

  hand you the little the little chewed on [TS]

  bones of their technology and and it [TS]

  enables the Air Force to feel like that [TS]

  it you know like Oh were we developed a [TS]

  the f-22 Raptor using alien technology [TS]

  yeah teehee we did this out like an [TS]

  amazing thing [TS]

  yeah but really it's just the stuff on [TS]

  the it's all the plans on the on the [TS]

  Jolly Rancher labels know what I mean [TS]

  like you had a friend i have a friend [TS]

  who his family's costa rica on vacation [TS]

  every year and his grandfather who [TS]

  mainly funded the vacation hehe like do [TS]

  you like the fact that he was kind of a [TS]

  big deal and when they went to Costa [TS]

  Rica he would bring hundreds and [TS]

  hundreds of ballpoint pens and give them [TS]

  to children who in 1982 were genuinely [TS]

  amazed by ballpoint pens he could get [TS]

  but you get anything you want with [TS]

  there's a whole ballpoint pen economy i [TS]

  don't know where they are today the pens [TS]

  with the children [TS]

  what I'm saying is something he go to [TS]

  the first union bank still much pens [TS]

  show up given to these kids and he got [TS]

  pretty much anything he wanted [TS]

  they were happy he was happy there was [TS]

  never a discussion about exactly how [TS]

  sophisticated of an instant [TS]

  it was involved here you get thirsty man [TS]

  a cop is gonna think it's the greatest [TS]

  technology in the world am i right [TS]

  well no I mean if you get thirsty backup [TS]

  it's just woke up [TS]

  yes good point you should check it in [TS]

  water that would be better technology [TS]

  yeah if you get if you get thirsty man [TS]

  drinking fountain that's kind of mean to [TS]

  just give me up yeah it's like you go [TS]

  this episode of rock on the line is [TS]

  brought to you by Squarespace the [TS]

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  on the line [TS]

  our thanks to squarespace for supporting [TS]

  Roderick online and all the great ships [TS]

  as I how do you like it buddy [TS]

  hey here I are you hungry here here's [TS]

  the plate there's a bread maker of [TS]

  ingredients for years the if you could [TS]

  be an ingredient you would be on group [TS]

  there's a breadmaker really everything [TS]

  our outreach we're going today we're [TS]

  gonna introduce you to sous-vide cooking [TS]

  we have no watch her power but all but [TS]

  you can cook it a hundred twenty degrees [TS]

  and it's perfectly into Syria at the [TS]

  there is no food here at all your movies [TS]

  say experiments on now I you know [TS]

  thinking about Zulus you coming I'm [TS]

  sorry we've covered so much gonna do a [TS]

  quick couple quick follow-ups yeah go [TS]

  ahead [TS]

  ok so a glop glop & zool I and I [TS]

  understand it's difficult to use [TS]

  language to describe this especially you [TS]

  know all of our earth terms for things [TS]

  but are they of the same for example are [TS]

  they from the same rough place like [TS]

  let's call [TS]

  let's call [TS]

  planet are they from the same planet and [TS]

  if so or even are they the same kinds of [TS]

  creatures or are they see i'm imagining [TS]

  that the three of them are from [TS]

  completely different places and are [TS]

  completely different kinds of creatures [TS]

  right I think we're not talking about [TS]

  the pandas and red pandas here even [TS]

  though they look pretty different [TS]

  they're both we still call panels i [TS]

  think where I think we're talking about [TS]

  like a salami versus the concept of God [TS]

  yeah we don't call them panels because [TS]

  we're from her you call them panels [TS]

  which is any confusing to me that but [TS]

  keep talking on earth language until uh [TS]

  until we forget about this is the day [TS]

  I'm going to reveal something to honor i [TS]

  am not a podcast I mean podcast I feel [TS]

  like all you had to do was really was [TS]

  watch the movie the masters of the [TS]

  universe or whatever it was with the [TS]

  raccoon in the and the and the tree [TS]

  oh yeah message any worse we are with [TS]

  the code or where Hodor Hodor Hodor you [TS]

  get the different parks and rec right [TS]

  mother's a lot of that to realize that [TS]

  every other planet that isn't earth is [TS]

  already populated by every kind of race [TS]

  of alien alright so raccoons and talking [TS]

  trees and and green a karate girls are [TS]

  all wandering around together so there's [TS]

  no reason to think that the images all [TS]

  strikingly bipedal that's true well that [TS]

  may be one of those things like the [TS]

  three-minute pop song that is just in [TS]

  the the the davinci like sort of i'll [TS]

  equip over Norwich flips over the [TS]

  Constitution this whole thing on their [TS]

  Buckley club and we learn that bipedal [TS]

  is like it's not just to think so we're [TS]

  not being not humans for not being earth [TS]

  'used write it with a bias it's actually [TS]

  no it actually is by peels are the best [TS]

  it just turns out that that's the best [TS]

  way to get around what if what if what [TS]

  if the evolution goes from like your [TS]

  fish swimming around to develop four [TS]

  legs to develop two legs to become a [TS]

  unit peed would that mean like lowly [TS]

  worm is the height of evolution for us [TS]

  we [TS]

  worm no the worm is got a shoe he has an [TS]

  apple car he definitely seems the [TS]

  happiest person in a very happy story he [TS]

  is by most by most measurements heavily [TS]

  disabled but he's able to paint is Apple [TS]

  house because he has a house that looks [TS]

  like an apple he's gotta pack are like [TS]

  many people having five years [TS]

  jaunty hat got a cool like a booty call [TS]

  that a what-you-call-it the Australian [TS]

  Austrian kind of like a viking hat yai [TS]

  yodelayheehoo 0 hat yeah right but then [TS]

  over here you go mr. frumble those a pic [TS]

  the can't drive in which i think is a [TS]

  little bit biggest I you know but the [TS]

  pig seem very happy in those stories to [TS]

  enlarge love getting hot look it's a hot [TS]

  dog or some ham will just go go over [TS]

  some ham from another Pig nobody in a [TS]

  Richard Scarry universe is having a bad [TS]

  time I mean everybody know their place [TS]

  they know what their job is because they [TS]

  have it they have jobs i am a fox that [TS]

  cleans chimneys and that's ok if you've [TS]

  ever been to a little german town [TS]

  somewhere I wasn't here I mean right and [TS]

  all good little German town somewhere in [TS]

  the third give all the you're involved [TS]

  who chose city you will find that that [TS]

  is how little Germantown's operate [TS]

  there's a little butcher and it's like [TS]

  it's like a rotary club got one of each [TS]

  occupation like over here this is the [TS]

  this is the the printmaker this is the [TS]

  this is the pornographer yeah [TS]

  the Fox is the house painter ok the worm [TS]

  is the yodeler [TS]

  ok you know like that that's how little [TS]

  Germantown's working on the walk around [TS]

  you you have a little basket pastic and [TS]

  you put your shop and you buy one pair [TS]

  of orthopaedic Sox the heavenly shen [TS]

  zhen it isn't like literally millions of [TS]

  people are making iphones it's in know [TS]

  there's a lot of segmentation in how [TS]

  every single person in Germany has a job [TS]

  which was his father's job and his [TS]

  father's job before him or her her [TS]

  father's job because before this [TS]

  generation [TS]

  no let me introduce him as he passed [TS]

  down like a pocket watch her addiction [TS]

  yeah that's right it's just like and [TS]

  it's right there in your name it's like [TS]

  yes Mr Shorten scheisse harmony your the [TS]

  the shine [TS]

  muller and write that means that you [TS]

  turned pigs in the week [TS]

  yeah you're you-you-you well are you or [TS]

  mold one [TS]

  ok I can't tell which is what which with [TS]

  Mueller means no it probably means you [TS]

  can multiply that [TS]

  yeah and if you really really wanted it [TS]

  do do it now I didn't realize i wanted [TS]

  to use isn't it funny how that works [TS]

  there's a name for that is my german [TS]

  name for that I had a very interesting [TS]

  experience the other day which made me [TS]

  which gave me new insight i think into [TS]

  this whole question that we're talking [TS]

  about the the ufl question well and I [TS]

  mean yeah let's call beautiful question [TS]

  is that some people can understand [TS]

  for better for worse at but it's also [TS]

  the Masters of the Universe question a [TS]

  little bit you know like McDonald's [TS]

  Marvel's Masters of the Universe [TS]

  Marvel's masters of the universe huh [TS]

  I the the sort of the United Nations [TS]

  idea of UFOs commanded that earth people [TS]

  are are just waiting we're just being [TS]

  sort of cultivated so that one day we [TS]

  are ready to join the United Nations of [TS]

  of universe inhabitants [TS]

  oh we're like the turkey of the universe [TS]

  so far mean it right there like he use [TS]

  gonna like kind of wait and see how it [TS]

  goes when I cannot get on the first [TS]

  ballot right not on the first ballot [TS]

  right you and you want to be in and [TS]

  other thing is all of our movies depict [TS]

  the united nations of the universe as [TS]

  mostly human beings with some blue [TS]

  people walking around looking like a [TS]

  star wars Senate because we're trying to [TS]

  we're trying to get it [TS]

  we're trying to get what it's gonna be [TS]

  like but in future UFO moviez we're [TS]

  going to find more and more that like [TS]

  the humans are the weird ones and most [TS]

  of the most everybody else there looks [TS]

  like a rhinoceros [TS]

  yeah but at overtime right we're getting [TS]

  accustomed to the idea but the other day [TS]

  I was walking on a through a park and I [TS]

  saw a group of people now I'm not sure [TS]

  are you familiar with the gutter punk [TS]

  subculture I think so this is the the [TS]

  young and [TS]

  willfully homeless Gus Van Sant kids [TS]

  right right and and they have this isn't [TS]

  about my kind of a private idaho and [TS]

  culture they do well it is yes but [TS]

  gutter punks within even that culture [TS]

  are a very specific brand of my own [TS]

  private idaho those okay um where they [TS]

  have they have a clear aesthetic and [TS]

  four for all of their like they're [TS]

  outside earnest like you can if you see [TS]

  to gutter punks coming through the Rye [TS]

  Luke you're going to recognize them as a [TS]

  member of the same tribe [TS]

  yeah and that tribe overlaps with you [TS]

  know with the normal sort of I i find it [TS]

  to be even less punk than it is it's [TS]

  closer to like tribal like nine inch [TS]

  nails e style you know it is like just [TS]

  classic hardcore whatever but it's it's [TS]

  it's own tribe and it's a little more [TS]

  like dark and gothy no I mean it's like [TS]

  tribal scarification and tattooing and [TS]

  and like elongated earlobes get the sink [TS]

  stoppers him stuff that that that within [TS]

  like hardcore community wouldn't exactly [TS]

  be what everybody was rocking over there [TS]

  but but one of the defining things about [TS]

  their about their aesthetic is that they [TS]

  mend their own clothes they wear just [TS]

  sort of the each one have sort of one [TS]

  outfit that they that they mend over and [TS]

  over and you have to wonder some of that [TS]

  stuff seems pretty mended you know what [TS]

  I mean like they like if you're a young [TS]

  gutter Punk and you come on the scene [TS]

  you've already got a kind of like a [TS]

  scarecrow outfit i agree before you [TS]

  before you've really well [TS]

  wormholes in the fucking somebody gave [TS]

  them a nice pair of slacks fit well and [TS]

  not accepted [TS]

  well where they start mending them right [TS]

  away you know a premium but you know [TS]

  their most of mostly wearing sort of [TS]

  clothes that are based in in black [TS]

  colors but then you put a layer of dirt [TS]

  and grime on it and it all kind of takes [TS]

  on this sort of grey blue like blue-gray [TS]

  black color [TS]

  I mean there's a certain color of [TS]

  garment that if I saw it if I saw swatch [TS]

  of it i would say gutter Punk because [TS]

  it's because it's a I a patina you [TS]

  cannot get any other way [TS]

  hmm anyway I have a long long long [TS]

  history and involvement with gutter [TS]

  punks my I had a good friend whose name [TS]

  was grant and he decided at the age of [TS]

  about twenty one that he wanted to be [TS]

  known as grant Funk Railroad that's not [TS]

  even funny the first time I've ever told [TS]

  you about Graham well right now I don't [TS]

  think you have that was a beautiful guy [TS]

  and the gutter Punk how much how much [TS]

  time did you really spend on that one [TS]

  Grand Funk Railroad I'm sure that what [TS]

  happened was like a lot of God upon [TS]

  culture it came up at some point when he [TS]

  was wasted [TS]

  he was high and then the a minute stock [TS]

  Grand Funk Railroad God and people would [TS]

  refer to him by that name Grand Funk [TS]

  Railroad ray row grant was and this was [TS]

  at a time when I was you know it's never [TS]

  certainly never gutter Punk but also [TS]

  never really like a confirmed street kid [TS]

  because I always you can't take at a [TS]

  certain at a certain point of education [TS]

  even self-education you cannot take that [TS]

  education back [TS]

  yeah as a different and i used to say [TS]

  you can't choose to join the proletarian [TS]

  right although if you don't have your [TS]

  number in your pocket that you could [TS]

  call to make it all get better within a [TS]

  couple days you know you're not really [TS]

  in the front area [TS]

  yeah you can't you yeah that's right you [TS]

  cannot you can you know I mean like you [TS]

  can choose [TS]

  use to not eat today but that's really [TS]

  different from the legacy of having [TS]

  missed a lot of meals as a kid a very [TS]

  different thing [TS]

  yeah you can choose to not eat for a [TS]

  month but it's it's the it's the mother [TS]

  teresa Gandhi problem right they they [TS]

  went they went all that way to ward the [TS]

  identification of themselves with people [TS]

  who truly are suffering but they both [TS]

  came from they both went to college they [TS]

  didn't do it now exclusively look cool [TS]

  though [TS]

  no no they had the best of intentions [TS]

  and a lot of people helped out a lot of [TS]

  people I see I see it all the time [TS]

  people who are who you know when they [TS]

  fix that a wag more bark bark less [TS]

  bumper sticker on the back of their [TS]

  subaru they mean they they mean it [TS]

  I'm not kidding right huh they're not [TS]

  just judging know they're helping but so [TS]

  these so gutter punks and I we traded in [TS]

  the same marketplace for a while and [TS]

  grant was actually a very close friend [TS]

  and we sort of crashed together often [TS]

  crashed upon one another fairly [TS]

  regularly when we were too wasted to [TS]

  move on down the road and grant you know [TS]

  smelled terrible but i did too and but [TS]

  he had a certain he was he was prepared [TS]

  to go further down the drain [TS]

  he's committed he's more committed i was [TS]

  at a party with him one time and he he [TS]

  stuck a fork into a into a burner on an [TS]

  electric stove because we were using the [TS]

  burner too hot knife hash and he stuck a [TS]

  fork into it because we're also you know [TS]

  heating up this hot knife to like a hot [TS]

  knife some drugs that nothing and he [TS]

  stuck a fork into it and we're like you [TS]

  know it's not called hot forkin room [TS]

  called knife and he took the fork [TS]

  well after it was red-hot and he just [TS]

  pressed it into his arm [TS]

  uh-huh i was like what are you doing [TS]

  something you can learn from watching [TS]

  Quincy yeah don't do that but you know [TS]

  that's that's where the line between [TS]

  months crazy man what are you doing [TS]

  look what he was you know he was the gym [TS]

  I it was legit what he was legit you [TS]

  defending this kind of behavior are you [TS]

  but I mean at the time it was like [TS]

  that's a pretty good party trick because [TS]

  you're gonna have earned fork on your [TS]

  arm rest of your life [TS]

  yeah that's that's true and you did that [TS]

  just now just for our benefit which is [TS]

  that like I gotta give it up to that I'm [TS]

  not gonna try it i don't have no desire [TS]

  to like I'm and just I'm not that [TS]

  attracted to things that make less of a [TS]

  statement than a t-shirt I would never [TS]

  wear well that's what that's not like [TS]

  what it was was he committed to what [TS]

  he's doing that knows can sign it [TS]

  I've been here if you if you I mean [TS]

  there are people who have put less [TS]

  thought that into tattoos so got to skip [TS]

  that one [TS]

  so anyway anyone is your point is he's [TS]

  committed to the gutter Punk lifestyle [TS]

  and ethos well i don't know i'm not even [TS]

  sure that gutter punks would describe [TS]

  and he doesn't understand what this [TS]

  means i'm so that they would describe [TS]

  anything about themselves as being a an [TS]

  ethos certainly not who or even a [TS]

  lifestyle i think i think if you if you [TS]

  posed this question to any gutter Punk [TS]

  they would just dismiss the whole line [TS]

  of questioning outright but here's the [TS]

  thing i'm walking through a park and I [TS]

  come upon a very large group of gutter [TS]

  punks there's probably 20 plus gutter [TS]

  punks of all sizes and shapes and [TS]

  genders and races right it's a it's [TS]

  truly a tribe of gutter punks in likes [TS]

  it too [TS]

  mhm and generally you see about four of [TS]

  them at a time right one of them will [TS]

  have a 1 will have a german shepherd [TS]

  puppy on a on a chain here and you know [TS]

  one of them will have a like one of [TS]

  their aesthetics is to take the little [TS]

  the little metal cap little metal top of [TS]

  a bit lighter and they take those and [TS]

  and sort of the crunch them into the [TS]

  brim of their baseball hats are onto [TS]

  their Levi's jacket zoo so it makes it [TS]

  kind of little it's a it has the effect [TS]

  of [TS]

  kind of studs and leather jacket studs [TS]

  but it's but they didn't even have to [TS]

  pay for the studs they just ripped this [TS]

  stuff off of lighters that that are you [TS]

  know used old liners are there people [TS]

  use every part of the later they use [TS]

  every part of the lighter that's exactly [TS]

  right now you know and so usually see [TS]

  about between two and four of them [TS]

  traveling together and there are as many [TS]

  female gutter punks is there are males I [TS]

  mean it's a very like it it really is [TS]

  it's almost like oregon country fair but [TS]

  turned into a dystopian future pump [TS]

  thing but here's there's 20 25 of them [TS]

  all together and I walk up on this group [TS]

  very curious like why what is this the [TS]

  gathering like why are you all here and [TS]

  they're there but they're playing music [TS]

  and as I get closer I realized they are [TS]

  playing full-on like hillbilly mountain [TS]

  music there's a guy with a tiny tiny [TS]

  tiny little like piccolo banjo they're [TS]

  producing full-on hillbilly not music [TS]

  they are then they are rocking it [TS]

  uh-huh right there's somebody playing I [TS]

  should you not a tub base [TS]

  Wow like a broomstick and a washtub and [TS]

  I like the wood boom one string bass and [TS]

  one coming right there's like that [TS]

  there's someone playing what we once [TS]

  upon a time called the Jew harp which is [TS]

  now a job who wanna hear your boring [TS]

  boring boring I went home [TS]

  oh there's armonica they're like two [TS]

  guitars there's a full-size banjo [TS]

  there's this piccolo banjo there's like [TS]

  a violin and flute and they're all the [TS]

  instruments are all our gutter pumped to [TS]

  write they're all like either handmade [TS]

  or found and patch to the and the and [TS]

  you know it look a little bit like Dexys [TS]

  Midnight Runners they looked exactly [TS]

  like Texas minute that's all i can see [TS]

  if you had if you took Dexys Midnight [TS]

  Runners from 1982 who and you put them [TS]

  and you chew them up and spit them into [TS]

  a hole in the ground like kimchi and [TS]

  left it there until now you know you get [TS]

  yellow trial and then you gently move [TS]

  the dirt aside and inside its got a fox [TS]

  is this whole [TS]

  is this banjo group of gutter punks and [TS]

  the music they're making is great it's [TS]

  like I mean like mountain hillbillies [TS]

  are not that far away from gutter punks [TS]

  anyway and it's it's come full circle [TS]

  right it's like this could be 1918 and [TS]

  here they are and they're singing and [TS]

  playing with a lot of like joy and [TS]

  there's a you know there are several [TS]

  gutter punks that are part of obviously [TS]

  part of the camp train that aren't [TS]

  playing music with them currently but [TS]

  are sitting around kind of looking like [TS]

  sort of sneering and looking like you [TS]

  know at and regarding me with a look [TS]

  like oh do you like this [TS]

  oh is that something that you like which [TS]

  is kind of a like a classic punk rock [TS]

  move right like where you pull your [TS]

  shirt down and show your boobs and then [TS]

  when somebody looks at you like oh do [TS]

  you like that [TS]

  is that something that you like they're [TS]

  like oh man really working against the [TS]

  grain super shaved now I stopped to [TS]

  listen to this band i'm super shamed by [TS]

  their friends for liking it because [TS]

  those that are we are we entertaining [TS]

  you are we like to clown to you not to [TS]

  eat its but i'm really in entertained [TS]

  and the thing that is most entertaining [TS]

  is that this band requires that these [TS]

  gutter pumps have done a thing which is [TS]

  antithetical to gutter Punk ism which is [TS]

  that they have coordinated with one [TS]

  another a little bit organized they got [TS]

  organized they learned a bunch of songs [TS]

  together they are all playing music [TS]

  together and yet they are clearly true [TS]

  gutter punks right i mean they are you [TS]

  can tell by looking at them that they're [TS]

  not posers [TS]

  this is a real tribe of totally real [TS]

  deep deep deep in it never going to be [TS]

  part of the normal world gutter punks [TS]

  and yet they're making banjo music [TS]

  that's actually good and I was like this [TS]

  is fucking UFOs [TS]

  oh right axis now is an analogy is the [TS]

  is which part of an analogy [TS]

  I don't know this is what so you're [TS]

  saying you're saying Dexys Midnight [TS]

  Runners gutter Punk committed committed [TS]

  kimchi people they might actually [TS]

  literally be UFOs I'm saying that the [TS]

  that the band diagrams are starting to [TS]

  overlap things on this is one of the [TS]

  signs know what strain it does not [TS]

  strain credulity have to tell you that [TS]

  as as RA okay so here's the thing you do [TS]

  a ido Pepsi challenge is this person [TS]

  info which one of these peoples info [TS]

  right i mean i think i think you know [TS]

  five times out of 7 i'm I picked the [TS]

  gutter punks [TS]

  well line up against the wall right [TS]

  here's your here's your straight-laced [TS]

  banker mr. business yeah man here's your [TS]

  here's your housewife who's taking a [TS]

  little bit of mothers little helper [TS]

  every day and then using hypocrites [TS]

  here's a cover your good or pumpkin [TS]

  Louie alternative lifestyle plate and a [TS]

  lighter in my head which one's the roof [TS]

  oh right everybody's gonna say the [TS]

  businessman or the housewife [TS]

  no one's going to say the gutter Punk [TS]

  yeah because too obvious through but in [TS]

  fact that this was that this was I think [TS]

  a little bit of a sign and write a [TS]

  little bit of a glimpse behind the [TS]

  matrix because how many people know [TS]

  enough about gutter punk subculture to [TS]

  walk up on a thing like that and say [TS]

  wait a minute this is weird [TS]

  the gathering of the gutter punks I'm [TS]

  see my concern not only scripture story [TS]

  here but my my thing is like I feel like [TS]

  and maybe this is just the entire [TS]

  entitlement of being my age and having [TS]

  been been through you know a couple [TS]

  rodeos i feel like i can look at the [TS]

  gutter punks and oh yeah you know that's [TS]

  stupid but I get that I get what they're [TS]

  going for their hey man there's a lot of [TS]

  housewives out there that I would find a [TS]

  lot more inscrutable maybe we are we all [TS]

  we all get the UFO we deserve [TS]

  well that's exactly right like a beard [TS]

  if you are living in the suburbs and [TS]

  there's a housewife that's behaving [TS]

  abnormally mhm [TS]

  that's not that unusual right because [TS]

  people playing people who complain about [TS]

  the food that was brought to a potluck [TS]

  at an elementary school [TS]

  I'm much more likely to think that might [TS]

  be a new phone well no that's the thing [TS]

  though every housewife in the suburbs is [TS]

  unusual in her own way [TS]

  I'll anna karenina yeah exactly so the [TS]

  woman that's that's complaining about [TS]

  the food at a potluck she's just [TS]

  behaving she's behaving consistent with [TS]

  the overarching scheme of a housewife [TS]

  who is drinking a little bit of white [TS]

  wine in the morning right but if you saw [TS]

  for suburban housewives walking down the [TS]

  street all carrying field hockey sticks [TS]

  who over their shoulders John are like [TS]

  if you saw for housewives playing field [TS]

  hockey you would know that that was [TS]

  maybe a little bit unusual shape sure [TS]

  that's what that is the equivalent of [TS]

  seeing 25 gutter punks playing banjos [TS]

  okay yeah i get i get i can sigh i can [TS]

  tell you that the thing I really get i [TS]

  can get how that must have been a really [TS]

  crazy experience except very subtle [TS]

  right because at first blush you're like [TS]

  oh there's a bunch of gutter punks and [TS]

  they're being a pain in the ass yeah but [TS]

  then to to see them like passionately [TS]

  playing music well on home-built [TS]

  instruments it was just it either either [TS]

  that subculture is expanding because [TS]

  because a fake gutter Punk in that [TS]

  situation would not have cut it right [TS]

  that that the core of that group was was [TS]

  was definitely down seem like a Steve I [TS]

  shut up or something right or some more [TS]

  like a vest some crusty kid who's who [TS]

  you know who is just running away from [TS]

  home who write like wouldn't wouldn't be [TS]

  part of this game [TS]

  these guys are going to the bottom of [TS]

  the ocean together but like yeah so [TS]

  anyway it just seemed to be one of those [TS]

  signs of like stuff's going to start to [TS]

  come unraveled everyone so while you're [TS]

  going to put put a credit card into one [TS]

  of those parking meter things and it's [TS]

  going to say today you're parking is [TS]

  free em USA what that never happens [TS]

  right and there's a reason it never [TS]

  happens because these computers now our [TS]

  program to be pure evil but all of a [TS]

  sudden the parking meter is just pumping [TS]

  out like free tickets [TS]

  oh when you stand there you watching the [TS]

  next person has to pay you like that was [TS]

  just for me [TS]

  little things little things are going to [TS]

  start going right [TS]

  ok and so that what does that indicate [TS]

  well that's just I mean little things go [TS]

  wrong all the time [TS]

  oh yeah that's a jamup day but when [TS]

  things little things start going right [TS]

  oh when the check engine light goes off [TS]

  oh right right right when the when the [TS]

  when the closet door that's always stuck [TS]

  stops ticking interesting it's like [TS]

  who's laying the groundwork for what [TS]

  here huh [TS]

  see what I'm saying i think i do I think [TS]

  they do when the gutter part punk start [TS]

  organizing and contributing to society [TS]

  and the form of music truth like in a [TS]

  way they're violating their credo but [TS]

  it's still consistent with their queen [TS]

  no I don't understand how it's possible [TS]

  it's like bending light who is a juggalo [TS]

  thing for you what well you know you [TS]

  remember you have to change of heart [TS]

  about the Juggalos oh I see what you're [TS]

  saying you know if you use some of your [TS]

  dive deep on a culture [TS]

  i'm suing google them and then but in [TS]

  this case is out of your personal [TS]

  experience you seen people jamming the [TS]

  tops of lighters into their have to go [TS]

  to keep that with a bandana and dogs not [TS]

  that cute actually talks prescreened [TS]

  just crunchy GOG uh the thing about [TS]

  juggalos is that liberals so I do not [TS]

  fit right there must be some a gutter [TS]

  Punk juggalo overlap but i don't think [TS]

  there's much [TS]

  ok ok gotta Punk's state keeping [TS]

  themselves [TS]

  I i'm still waiting for the juggalo [TS]

  risin and I know that they most [TS]

  definitely feel chosen by the who folds [TS]

  but I think that's another one of these [TS]

  dick cheney eaten cows with bleep blorp [TS]

  I think you're right sit for example [TS]

  let's say you decided you want to get a [TS]

  personal assistant you probably would [TS]

  not go on Twitter and say hey does [TS]

  anybody want to be my personal assistant [TS]

  well you might not okay I do it all the [TS]

  time [TS]

  ok ok because the body is getting a lot [TS]

  of vetting to do and it's not going to [TS]

  be the most qualified people because [TS]

  what kind of super qualified person sits [TS]

  on Twitter looking for a job and just [TS]

  answer something randomly you would want [TS]

  to do something a little more strategic [TS]

  so the UFOs would not necessarily want [TS]

  to go to the people who are [TS]

  we regard themselves you don't say it's [TS]

  a little bit on the nose yeah they're [TS]

  not they're not walking up on people [TS]

  that have a heaven and like a green [TS]

  alien on a t-shirt on a really long [TS]

  baggy t-shirt I hope not i just really [TS]

  really really yeah i really hope not or [TS]

  like alien part Simpson or something i [TS]

  really hope not but they might sidle up [TS]

  so one of those let's say let's say [TS]

  you're a juggalo who's got an alien face [TS]

  on a long t-shirt [TS]

  mhm everyone's well you gotta go to the [TS]

  dentist right because your mom is gonna [TS]

  say you gotta go to the dentist your er [TS]

  slaughter insurance might as well use it [TS]

  right you're not a gutter punk who never [TS]

  goes to the dentist to stay back [TS]

  you're a you're a juggalo who sometimes [TS]

  makes it back to Grandma's house and [TS]

  drink a lot of pop gonna get taken care [TS]

  of you probably haven't seen your mom in [TS]

  a long time but you do see your grandma [TS]

  she understands and she's going to take [TS]

  you to the she's going to take you to [TS]

  the dentist so you get in the elevator [TS]

  at the dentist's office and you're [TS]

  riding up a dentist's office on the [TS]

  fourth floor because now the buildings [TS]

  in your town or taller than five stories [TS]

  tall right on the second floor elevator [TS]

  stops the door opens the guy gets in [TS]

  he's going up to and in the space of [TS]

  going up two floors you juggalo in the [TS]

  in the glow-in-the-dark alien smoking a [TS]

  bong t-shirt yeah have a conversation [TS]

  with this guy [TS]

  you get off on the fourth floor to go to [TS]

  the dentist's office he stays on to go [TS]

  to the fifth floor and completely but in [TS]

  the course of those two stories that you [TS]

  travel together he gives you some [TS]

  information about UFOs that indicates to [TS]

  you that you have been tapped [TS]

  ok right that's how it's going to happen [TS]

  that's how it's going to happen to a [TS]

  juggalo oh all I see what you're saying [TS]

  and he's only thinking what could be [TS]

  like a matrix kind of scenario like an [TS]

  agent smith type is gonna sign up right [TS]

  and then they're going to go back to [TS]

  their tribe they're gathering they're [TS]

  gonna say dudes dudes I had an [TS]

  experience right and that's going to [TS]

  galvanize a certain little quadrant the [TS]

  Juggalos are going to go you know [TS]

  they're going to go into the the next [TS]

  day with new knowledge new information [TS]

  so that when the anchorman comes [TS]

  they are prime didn't know their job [TS]

  who in the big in the system right [TS]

  whoo-hoo [TS]

  when the anchorman starts appearing on [TS]

  the television monitors at the at the [TS]

  toad in the hole [TS]

  they're ready they know they know what [TS]

  this is about [TS]

  stay tuned for a very special [TS]

  announcement up here comes here comes [TS]

  the anchorman [TS]

  dude Shh anchorman i love the name so [TS]

  much I don't understand why are using it [TS]

  but i really like it because he could be [TS]

  the anchor man like in a relay like [TS]

  you're the way the first guy that does [TS]

  not drop the baton of stupid anchorman [TS]

  you're the last one you got you got to [TS]

  do that last quarter mile what I'm not [TS]

  claiming is that the UFOs are giving me [TS]

  any privileged information who they are [TS]

  just picking me to sit in the chair and [TS]

  have the experience of experiencing the [TS]

  who posed for the first time with [TS]

  everybody as a kind of proxy [TS]

  uh-huh so that I'm seeing it just as [TS]

  everyone else is seeing it but I'm on TV [TS]

  saying look this is what we're seeing [TS]

  am i right are we seeing this yes I am [TS]

  worried are you worried this is gonna [TS]

  seem perfidious or disloyal to your [TS]

  countrymen [TS]

  well this is this is what this is the [TS]

  trust this is why they picked me right [TS]

  as the trust that I'm able to in inspire [TS]

  where other people are like is this guy [TS]

  just feeding us a lot of ball is he just [TS]

  brought some brainwash juggalo like my [TS]

  way out why a phony award-winning [TS]

  podcaster and Roderick yeah why should [TS]

  we listen to this guy he's just telling [TS]

  us what the aliens want us to hear seems [TS]

  Gibby Carson Daly yeah exactly that's [TS]

  exactly right you don't make a lot of [TS]

  people going to say a lot literally [TS]

  that's what people are going to say when [TS]

  a constant your part you're part of the [TS]

  you know Carson Daly is already a Borg [TS]

  right Jimmy Kimmel right like they [TS]

  they're already paired in with the alien [TS]

  masters want them to say why not just [TS]

  use one of them [TS]

  yeah I mean it's interesting so obvious [TS]

  that's the key right [TS]

  in order fresh fresh spin on the brand [TS]

  yeah in order for people to truly trust [TS]

  the messenger The Messenger has to be [TS]

  outside The Messenger has to be able to [TS]

  criticize the message interesting right [TS]

  so so they don't see you as a dupe or or [TS]

  a mobile or Schmo no i'm not a Schmo or [TS]

  ammo or dope or adult I'm like I would [TS]

  be so happy if UFOs do something weird [TS]

  before right if the if stuff starts [TS]

  going going a little bit sideways or [TS]

  inexplicable yeah i would be there [TS]

  saying well now wait a minute this is a [TS]

  little bit inexplicably tell me you you [TS]

  might be comically clip on a shit I [TS]

  would be calling the glee clubs are I [TS]

  mean then the thing is they're way ahead [TS]

  of me [TS]

  alright they know i'm gonna be calling [TS]

  them on this shit but I but you know the [TS]

  end and the hole is that does the boot [TS]

  fear the aunt does the boot for the and [TS]

  Frank the whole game would be this is [TS]

  what the amazing thing about the game [TS]

  the whole game would be my aware enough [TS]

  I at what level am i aware of of my [TS]

  culpability at what level am i aware i'm [TS]

  being too right and I would always be [TS]

  searching for the next layer of being [TS]

  duped like I always already think about [TS]

  how many people join the army knowing [TS]

  exactly what happens to people who join [TS]

  the army but why we have an army we well [TS]

  I don't want to put too fine a point on [TS]

  it but you know sometimes we have wars [TS]

  and you're gonna have to go die and you [TS]

  sign up for that that that's your job [TS]

  now you also probably get a college [TS]

  education and medical care for life but [TS]

  let's set that aside for now you're [TS]

  saying you going to this [TS]

  yeah yeah open open wide eyes shut [TS]

  hardheart open you go into this and [TS]

  you're already right you're right you're [TS]

  ready to go into this great guns you're [TS]

  gonna you're gonna ride this thing as [TS]

  long as it goes but you can keep your [TS]

  eyes open [TS]

  well that's I mean this is what [TS]

  qualifies me for the job right because [TS]

  we already spend all day every day going [TS]

  I know I'm being duped a thousand [TS]

  different ways how like I accept accept [TS]

  refined sugar i accept the fact that [TS]

  they are playing a weezer in the grocery [TS]

  store now I accept the fact that i [TS]

  cannot drive a car without putting a [TS]

  seatbelt on because the car will lecture [TS]

  me [TS]

  through a series of bongs who I I accept [TS]

  all these things i know that i'm being [TS]

  mind-controlled yeah yeah but i'm also [TS]

  looking for the next layer of mind [TS]

  control and the one after that [TS]

  hmm that's the job that's the job gang I [TS]

  think I'm finally getting its the same [TS]

  reason when they call me up for jury [TS]

  duty and I go the I really don't want [TS]

  jury duty and go really tell us more [TS]

  I say ah i just i kinda don't trust the [TS]

  system i can't anything no offense you [TS]

  guys you know but I add the system seems [TS]

  weird the two jury things i've sat on I [TS]

  tried really hard but I still didn't [TS]

  feel great about how it turned out and [TS]

  you know it's it's it's difficult and [TS]

  they all look at each other and their [TS]

  fucking licking their chops because you [TS]

  know what I just identify myself either [TS]

  identify myself as the ultimate juror [TS]

  that both sides would love because I've [TS]

  shown that I fret and I think about it [TS]

  and I don't have a hard-on for either [TS]

  side [TS]

  that's right right and that's that's [TS]

  kind of you at the UFOs that's right [TS]

  they start to attorneys three aliens [TS]

  they want somebody who's who's up there [TS]

  saying what everybody's thinking right [TS]

  and that's how people learn to trust [TS]

  this the spokesman and but then the game [TS]

  for me would be like I know that's what [TS]

  they're doing to you know and I'm saying [TS]

  that out loud [TS]

  ladies and gentlemen I share your [TS]

  concerns I is I've talked to bleep blorp [TS]

  about this i have I i believe me I [TS]

  understand [TS]

  ladies and gentlemen let's ask ourselves [TS]

  this question is dual the last 1i think [TS]

  that's where the fucking school yeah [TS]

  like good look let me handle that let me [TS]

  worry about that but is even the last I [TS]

  don't think zoo is I think zool is [TS]

  probably the guy behind the desk at the [TS]

  US Embassy in New share [TS]

  it's all I can do not to think about [TS]

  what is the nature of the fourth Ruffo [TS]

  if you've gone past the daiquiri kept [TS]

  giving some unisom hold now full count [TS]

  with Janie and the electric chain is [TS]

  still sitting there on the couch you've [TS]

  met less than a gaseous form inside of a [TS]

  space raincoat you go into the [TS]

  refrigerator and up the stairs as their [TS]

  school [TS]

  mhm right and then what [TS]

  then what you cross the streams [TS]

  obviously at that moment you get you get [TS]

  a get a team of three female [TS]

  Ghostbusters and you cross the stream [TS]

  easy text the question comes what are [TS]

  you okay with that are you okay with not [TS]

  knowing what exists behind that fourth [TS]

  door it sounds like you're okay with [TS]

  that and you're maybe even now you're [TS]

  curious who can know what's behind the [TS]

  fourth door entry clinton hillary [TS]

  clinton who she's the one that knows the [TS]

  contingency plan if anything happens to [TS]

  you god forbid is there [TS]

  do you have a contingency plan in mind [TS]

  for who could be your second in this [TS]

  that's not i don't think that's you [TS]

  think they have to just blow just cancel [TS]

  the whole thing Johnson china is not [TS]

  available [TS]

  me and various earth-death I mean death [TS]

  i think but i think the first they're [TS]

  gonna put me through one of those [TS]

  airport scanner and this is where they [TS]

  fix that's what they fix your help [TS]

  yeah they fix my help you the first [TS]

  three times you said this I thought it [TS]

  was a very very funny pit and I was 32 [TS]

  realize it's not a bit [TS]

  no it's not a better at all they're [TS]

  getting on the first thing first thing [TS]

  they're gonna do is they're going to [TS]

  repair the ligaments in my ACL like your [TS]

  space and tommy john surgery they're [TS]

  gonna do they're gonna they're gonna [TS]

  they're gonna clean me out you're gonna [TS]

  take off all the skin tags no RX about [TS]

  your heads not gonna be allergic to [TS]

  itself anymore [TS]

  that's right my little broken finger is [TS]

  going to be able to straighten itself [TS]

  out all the while about your teeth are [TS]

  gonna fix your teeth absolutely going to [TS]

  fix my teeth that's what I'm really way [TS]

  that's so nice to just corn on the cob [TS]

  again huh [TS]

  they're going to take all the little [TS]

  cancerous cells that haven't started to [TS]

  metastasis eyes yet yeah they're going [TS]

  to just take them out that's this is [TS]

  nothing for them I was like well yeah [TS]

  it's like running a helmet over a [TS]

  sweater to them this is nothing that i'm [TS]

  i'm going to be like I'm gonna be like [TS]

  washed rice after this they're just [TS]

  going to comb out all the impurities and [TS]

  then I mean maybe after the anchorman [TS]

  has you know there's gonna be a certain [TS]

  point which my brain can't handle it [TS]

  anymore [TS]

  yeah and then they're going to retire me [TS]

  22 availed somewhere you think they put [TS]

  you did they put you down with UFOs I [TS]

  made by this point I mean you're going [TS]

  to live for [TS]

  let's be honest about 700 years yeah [TS]

  because we've well as we discover with [TS]

  sign [TS]

  chance even if we fix all the things [TS]

  that's still a statistical probability [TS]

  is very very difficult to live beyond a [TS]

  certain amount of years in your case i'm [TS]

  gonna say they're probably give you the [TS]

  undercoating and not charge you for it [TS]

  also may be all things so you don't get [TS]

  featured skin tags it comes right from [TS]

  the factory the undercoating comes right [TS]

  they know diseases we haven't even heard [TS]

  of yet they're gonna fix you're gonna be [TS]

  good to go but something's gonna happen [TS]

  heat death of the universe but 700 years [TS]

  from now you're gonna need to retire [TS]

  let's call it a month usually and 700 [TS]

  years yeah what is it the seven 6969 [TS]

  night he went over 29 but I feel like [TS]

  seven is good for me [TS]

  yeah but you know I was talking to my [TS]

  mom the other day and it's been very hot [TS]

  up here in the northwest [TS]

  I was gone for the weekend and I came [TS]

  back I was like a mom would you do this [TS]

  weekend she said well I mostly read and [TS]

  I said immediately [TS]

  wow that sounds like a great weekend and [TS]

  she was like it really was and then I [TS]

  heard us as though listening from [TS]

  outside i was like huh that's [TS]

  interesting [TS]

  my mom spent the entire weekend reading [TS]

  and I immediately identified that and [TS]

  and identified with that as like a great [TS]

  weekend and internet like stop to [TS]

  process it you just go like that sounds [TS]

  really wow you just you just read all [TS]

  around [TS]

  Wow but there are a lot of people that [TS]

  would not think that was a great weekend [TS]

  and there are a lot of people that would [TS]

  think that was a horrible weekend and [TS]

  there are a lot of people that wouldn't [TS]

  be able to process those words was [TS]

  considered a weekend [TS]

  why would you what you know you know you [TS]

  know let's say I'm let's say the [TS]

  anchorman is 700 years old man will you [TS]

  eventually start referring to yourself [TS]

  in the third person regularly [TS]

  well we'll see website with the [TS]

  anchorman start referring to himself in [TS]

  the third person will see what the [TS]

  anchorman besides because the anchorman [TS]

  is an independent thinker and i was [TS]

  going to decide for himself [TS]

  you have no idea how much wisdom you're [TS]

  gonna keep that you have to worry about [TS]

  stupid shit anymore well you obviously [TS]

  there's still tons of stupid chick you [TS]

  discover new kinds of stupid shit you [TS]

  didn't know about but you're not going [TS]

  to think about skin tags and eczema you [TS]

  guys think about that finger in your [TS]

  teeth [TS]

  all that stuff is gone and i'm assuming [TS]

  there's also beer [TS]

  now you can you can you can now you're [TS]

  now you are truly living what we thought [TS]

  you know back in the 1960s Peter Drucker [TS]

  we're gonna have this creative culture [TS]

  in the life of the mind haha this is [TS]

  living that the anchorman the anchorman [TS]

  right and the anchorman it is a job [TS]

  being the anchorman so that they're [TS]

  obviously they're filling my CC [TS]

  seriously everything's a job John it [TS]

  doesn't have to be a bad it's not a [TS]

  death sentence to have a job but nobody [TS]

  pays is what I'm saying oh so that like [TS]

  my bitcoin indicator is likened ding [TS]

  ding ding or whatever the definitely [TS]

  paying space dollars [TS]

  well they would but what are bitcoins if [TS]

  not space dollars i'm getting sick haha [TS]