Roderick on the Line

Ep. 227: "Fifth Knob"


  this episode of Roderick on the line is [TS]

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  [Music] [TS]

  hello hey John I Merlin how's it going [TS]

  good [TS]

  re well alright here's Andres do I can [TS]

  you subdue yeah yeah I got in the groove [TS]

  with them the kind of a kind of Public [TS]

  Radio discussion [TS]

  [Music] [TS]

  you got those before yeah you can do it [TS]

  i turn my volume down to my too low [TS]

  no good ok I were worried about [TS]

  overdriving why because i like to keep a [TS]

  certain tone of the show and I don't [TS]

  really have skills with the microphone [TS]

  now I see what is the tone you like to [TS]

  keep the show I like to stay in the [TS]

  moment huh [TS]

  that's my tuna uh-huh I'm yeah I'm here [TS]

  for whatever comes along you know [TS]

  whatever happens but yesterday the [TS]

  moment is right [TS]

  not a sound really quiet you do yeah why [TS]

  you worried about overdriving always [TS]

  felt like you know because you did you [TS]

  drive the boat because you're the [TS]

  subcommander [TS]

  yeah you always can set the levels [TS]

  however you like [TS]

  yeah that's true fixing host as they say [TS]

  any pics and post for all I know you've [TS]

  been putting some even putting some word [TS]

  filter on me all these years [TS]

  alright like that are you put the wall [TS]

  pedal on me you could've been fucking [TS]

  with me this entire time [TS]

  no no I make sure you always sound very [TS]

  dignified so you you have a dignified [TS]

  performance and then I try to keep your [TS]

  I don't cut out the snorts or anything [TS]

  cause I think that's part of the show [TS]

  you have said you said a mouthful [TS]

  mhm keep the snorts snorts snorts are [TS]

  part of the show [TS]

  that's our motto my curses i do listen [TS]

  to the show and so I here when I say [TS]

  things wrong [TS]

  I here when i accidentally refer to [TS]

  Ghostbusters as back to the future and [TS]

  then I realize that's on the record [TS]

  forever [TS]

  yeah yeah if I was worried about the [TS]

  permanent record boy I'd have another [TS]

  thing that woke me up in the middle of [TS]

  the night [TS]

  yeah last night I had a dream where I [TS]

  was you know I was being chased and [TS]

  running chasing dream and I hid inside [TS]

  the torpedo tube [TS]

  the submarine i was in a summary and I [TS]

  ran in and I climbed into the torpedo [TS]

  tube to hide and then you can guess what [TS]

  happened [TS]

  oh now the villain the chaser sealed me [TS]

  in the torpedo tube [TS]

  oh no you don't like that knows terrible [TS]

  huh did you awake with a start [TS]

  yes yes I what with the terrible feeling [TS]

  that I was trapped in a torpedo tube and [TS]

  then unlike you know in most cases in a [TS]

  situation like that I roll over and I [TS]

  say happy thoughts [TS]

  puppy's eyes name but in this case I was [TS]

  so intrigued that I rolled over was like [TS]

  all right let's play this out [TS]

  yeah and and and then the Utopia to was [TS]

  flooded which was also awful [TS]

  this is a lot of your bad stuff you [TS]

  don't like I don't wanna you know [TS]

  trigger you but I don't know you don't [TS]

  like the idea of being closed in [TS]

  somewhere [TS]

  no because again on a submarine to begin [TS]

  with probably not your best day I [TS]

  wouldn't have been a good submariner [TS]

  yeah I would not want to be a torpedo [TS]

  tube and the only thing that could make [TS]

  a small confined Darkspace worse is if [TS]

  it'd been flooded with water and I [TS]

  ground in it just like drowning in a [TS]

  thing I mean no wait a minute I've got a [TS]

  thing about drowning in a group torpedo [TS]

  tube is that be relatively quick and [TS]

  painless you hope you hope it's really [TS]

  suffocating think that that then I can I [TS]

  going to fear the most [TS]

  okay look like a lack of oxygen that's [TS]

  right yeah i mean shoot me all day long [TS]

  knife me acid hot lava throw me from a [TS]

  tall building hit me with a car [TS]

  bludgeon me to death all those things [TS]

  yeah I'll take in stride with as you say [TS]

  dignity [TS]

  you sound like you're really prepared [TS]

  from but don't suffocate me [TS]

  yeah come on [TS]

  a little fucking class submarines are an [TS]

  interesting thing also because if you [TS]

  think about the stuff you're exposed to [TS]

  as a kid at least for me I feel like [TS]

  submarines maybe like quicksand gorilla [TS]

  suits like submarines were thing for a [TS]

  while like you even think of how infra [TS]

  red october or think about one thing [TS]

  only one people even like way before [TS]

  that though the submarines that we had [TS]

  access to there was always that element [TS]

  some element of claustrophobia but it [TS]

  was also it was just it was really cool [TS]

  and it was until I saw something like [TS]

  dust boot will get a real feeling of [TS]

  like oh no this year you don't because [TS]

  like if you think about the scenes on [TS]

  the on the Russian sub I mean is that [TS]

  main room is pretty it's pretty roomy I [TS]

  mean you can walk around you don't have [TS]

  to bend over there's chairs and and it [TS]

  seems very accommodating you're talking [TS]

  about run for Red October where I say oh [TS]

  yeah what you said but I mean hunt for [TS]

  red october yeah they've got like a [TS]

  dining room table in there nobody even [TS]

  like even the like that was a mega sub [TS]

  right right but I mean it's it doesn't [TS]

  have that sense of like if you ever [TS]

  really on a boat [TS]

  i mean it's it's such a a model of [TS]

  economy is a model of a modern major [TS]

  major major economical but pulling every [TS]

  single cubic inch has to be utilized [TS]

  efficiently all the time and it seems [TS]

  like they very much [TS]

  err on the side of smaller rather than [TS]

  bigger and you're you know always up [TS]

  against somebody else there's not lots [TS]

  of places where two people can walk by [TS]

  each other without having to change [TS]

  their their posture and position you [TS]

  know I mean I did not know we were going [TS]

  to talk about boat design today [TS]

  yeah but that's that's a perfect example [TS]

  of how this show just goes where the day [TS]

  takes us is that right you feel like you [TS]

  feel like you never really know what's [TS]

  waiting for you here [TS]

  what could what could happen I mean I'm [TS]

  i am about to i ampregnant with an [TS]

  operation petticoat reference how right [TS]

  and i'm just sitting here on top of this [TS]

  operation petticoat reference so excited [TS]

  by it because what was the [TS]

  last personal ones last time i got to [TS]

  make 11 will the next time be where [TS]

  could i ever make an operation petticoat [TS]

  reference and have the person i made it [TS]

  to bail [TS]

  alright is it set them daddy with Jack [TS]

  the show was at the movie with Jack [TS]

  Lemmon uh you are thinking thinking uh [TS]

  no no I'm thinking everything looks so [TS]

  you i'm thinking mr. Roberts probably [TS]

  one of the worst things i'm doing right [TS]

  now is and I can't believe this never [TS]

  occurred to me till now is I think in my [TS]

  head I can inflate operation petticoat [TS]

  with petticoat junction and it didn't [TS]

  realize until just now right [TS]

  see that is a very common thing that has [TS]

  happened to me before also but where [TS]

  there's two things there's Petticoat [TS]

  Junction the film with Cary Grant [TS]

  there's Petticoat Junction the [TS]

  television show with jamie lee curtis a [TS]

  young Jamie Lee Curtis oh my god I i [TS]

  think i think oh my gosh okay [TS]

  oh right she thing we know we're full [TS]

  points to John that when you had me you [TS]

  had me good [TS]

  even so where's this whole rat king of [TS]

  multiple sisters and like country [TS]

  bumpkins that's kind of an ugly [TS]

  old-fashioned term pumpkins but like [TS]

  wasn't a petticoat junction was more in [TS]

  that mold of like roll like the CBS [TS]

  rural TV shows right [TS]

  oh you're talking about yeah right like [TS]

  like Dukes of Hazzard well you know you [TS]

  take something like an Andy Griffith [TS]

  Show and you've got things like in that [TS]

  I think that was the source of the [TS]

  spin-off Gomer Pyle USMC right arm and [TS]

  you've got things like you got your [TS]

  green acres your Beverly Hillbillies you [TS]

  get your beverly hillbillies [TS]

  I think and then and so all I remember [TS]

  about this so first of all remember [TS]

  those those shows were on a lot there in [TS]

  reruns a lot i remember reading in my [TS]

  studies that there is basically [TS]

  something happened with at CBS in the [TS]

  early seventies they decided to [TS]

  basically sweep the decks and say we we [TS]

  are losing the urban demo [TS]

  something along these lines are you [TS]

  think this is the time of like you know [TS]

  it's the sixties early seventies let's [TS]

  create my stuff happening [TS]

  yeah and we have all these shows that [TS]

  are completely out of touch with the [TS]

  youth the rabbit used culture [TS]

  yeah they're corny corny yeah yeah and [TS]

  so and that's and so at least in the [TS]

  conventional wisdom that the history of [TS]

  this is that when CBS launched all those [TS]

  the great sitcoms like you know you [TS]

  think about that era of all the family [TS]

  later the jeffersons what else you got [TS]

  in there you got mod of course [TS]

  eventually one day at a time but that [TS]

  all started with sweeping the decks [TS]

  about you and your sweet sweet the shit [TS]

  out of my enjoy i enjoyed the rural [TS]

  shows when i was a kid [TS]

  well the funny thing is you know a lot [TS]

  of these shows that they had long run [TS]

  five six years I mean and then they were [TS]

  in syndication when we were kids as [TS]

  we've talked about before [TS]

  yeah but uh but where they were [TS]

  syndicated what vary by region and [TS]

  petticoat junction and green acres [TS]

  neither were in a syndication in the [TS]

  Seattle area or there's another [TS]

  possibility which is that my babysitter [TS]

  do not watch that channel babysitter [TS]

  controlled the when you're negligent [TS]

  babysitter's was the one who controls [TS]

  the channel changer control the channel [TS]

  changer I never well there wasn't the [TS]

  channel changer at the time you have to [TS]

  get up and walk all the way across this [TS]

  current I'll turn the knob but take the [TS]

  kids to but kids were not allowed to [TS]

  touch the TV and the babysitter so there [TS]

  should be another small consolations [TS]

  right well she ran a tight ship right i [TS]

  mean she but she was funny as the TV was [TS]

  all the way on the far side of the [TS]

  living room and it was just a regular [TS]

  style American style TV at the time [TS]

  which was about the size of what like a [TS]

  box of wine right it's not supportable [TS]

  know it was a bit of it wasn't a console [TS]

  didn't have a record player and also but [TS]

  it was a what would you what size would [TS]

  be it's like it's like when you order [TS]

  toilet paper from [TS]

  yes it comes in a box that was about the [TS]

  size of [TS]

  a television set for most important TV [TS]

  standard wasn't on the floor [TS]

  it was on a piece of furniture ok at the [TS]

  end that I think you would call a [TS]

  dresser maybe an arm but like if you [TS]

  wanted to move into the kids room when [TS]

  they're home sick from school that would [TS]

  be quite an undertaking [TS]

  yeah this is a very large TV it was made [TS]

  out of wood ok I I know what you mean [TS]

  yeah I see why you're avoiding console [TS]

  but I know exactly what you mean we [TS]

  might have some kind of cocoa fake [TS]

  columns and stuff like that [TS]

  Boober burger it was a color TV but it [TS]

  was not direct it wasn't dressed up [TS]

  it was it was a you know obviously like [TS]

  some of our listeners are thinking back [TS]

  to the largest TV they can recall and it [TS]

  was made a black plastic and this was [TS]

  not that this is made out of wood it was [TS]

  handcrafted by someone that had it [TS]

  didn't have didn't have tubes like an [TS]

  amp but it was a cathode-ray television [TS]

  with a very prominently curved screen a [TS]

  curved screen that's right that when you [TS]

  turn it on a little dot appeared and I [TS]

  want to hear that a really high-pitched [TS]

  noise [TS]

  yeah and then it sat for a second as it [TS]

  figured it was a collected itself and [TS]

  warmed itself up and got that picture [TS]

  anyway [TS]

  yeah we couldn't touch it but she would [TS]

  she would periodically throughout the [TS]

  day stand up from her card table put out [TS]

  her her more cigarette walk across to [TS]

  the television and change the channel [TS]

  and I don't know whether that was [TS]

  because Bob Barker was on she watched [TS]

  her stories during the middle of the day [TS]

  and then at a certain point I think on [TS]

  behalf of the kids when they got off the [TS]

  school she turned she got up turn the [TS]

  channel and then Hogan's Heroes himself [TS]

  how can get UHS your real I mean it was [TS]

  what there were three channels in PBS ok [TS]

  we didn't there was no nothing was going [TS]

  on even an independent station [TS]

  no no no customs which is what we always [TS]

  got black-and-white reruns and [TS]

  Flintstones and stuff like that in [TS]

  Alaska maybe well not even not even but [TS]

  she with the point the point is she was [TS]

  not she did not have any particular find [TS]

  this for the rural programs [TS]

  that's not what we watched and I and I [TS]

  always assumed it was because they [TS]

  weren't on they weren't on TV in seattle [TS]

  or Alaska those those particular shows [TS]

  Petticoat Junction the or I'm sorry [TS]

  operation petticoat now you got me doing [TS]

  it [TS]

  operation petticoat a sauna TV show to [TS]

  what the TV show is the one with jamie [TS]

  lee curtis and what was crazy about it [TS]

  was in the film in the film that was [TS]

  made much earlier like the film is from [TS]

  the seventies right fifties right yeah [TS]

  59 yeah it had Tony Curtis and I guess [TS]

  you were making a funny on the fact that [TS]

  they were family now and then Jamie Lee [TS]

  Curtis was cast like such as Lieutenant [TS]

  Barbara during for 23 episodes [TS]

  yeah yeah and so operation petticoat [TS]

  television show ya was like done as a [TS]

  kind of farce like Gilligan's Island [TS]

  style like knee slapper butBut in the [TS]

  one of those that wasn't a kind of like [TS]

  a sexy ABC kind of show [TS]

  yes exactly that's what i was getting at [TS]

  it was a little bit sex t4a for a kid [TS]

  who is I mean the whole idea of these [TS]

  guys a sailing around during the wool in [TS]

  a pink submarine [TS]

  yeah maybe racy pretty icy to to my [TS]

  little kid he is occasionally the [TS]

  implications for an adult are pretty [TS]

  different from just the whack-a-doodle [TS]

  of being a kid [TS]

  well but I think also there was some [TS]

  aspect of it like not only was the [TS]

  submarine pink but a but they were there [TS]

  was a they were they were ever there was [TS]

  an emergency right obviously you're [TS]

  being painted the submarine pink because [TS]

  you can I read you the short description [TS]

  on IMDb yellowthroat high jinks on the [TS]

  high seas when the u.s. submarine has to [TS]

  take on a collection of female nurses [TS]

  somehow or another the Sun was painted [TS]

  pink in the process there and anna and i [TS]

  think okay I think I think the way that [TS]

  it got painted pink in the in the [TS]

  process was it was like a primer right [TS]

  they had a private pink prior to [TS]

  painting in its battleship gray [TS]

  nia or i don't remember but anyway so it [TS]

  wasn't just the sub was pink it was also [TS]

  full of nurses yeah so in that sense it [TS]

  was like a mash it had a mass by but it [TS]

  only obviously only lasted for like a [TS]

  season and a half or something but I was [TS]

  it was it was right up there with [TS]

  Charlie's Angels [TS]

  yeah in terms of like it nothing ever [TS]

  happened that you never really got to me [TS]

  it was television but you get your your [TS]

  imagination could run while what you [TS]

  know what if i were a little bit older [TS]

  and I were honest pink submarine full of [TS]

  nurses kept him [TS]

  the problem was I was 10 and so even if [TS]

  i was a little bit older [TS]

  13 i still wouldn't have been allowed on [TS]

  a submarine [TS]

  yeah and feature john astin and also jim [TS]

  Varney the guy from you know the earnest [TS]

  guy [TS]

  Ernest you mean like Ernest goes to [TS]

  watch goes to camp and stuff like that [TS]

  yeah Jim Barton it i didn't know he had [TS]

  a he had a career but outside of Being [TS]

  Earnest anything about John asked don't [TS]

  change the subject here but the other [TS]

  weird thing is like you know a lot of [TS]

  times you know a success breeds success [TS]

  like one network will do a show [TS]

  obviously and then another network will [TS]

  do a very similar show so I mean it's [TS]

  kind of weird like when you're a little [TS]

  kid [TS]

  it's not like you and your bartels like [TS]

  I've never even heard of a bartels some [TS]

  people have CBS some people have [TS]

  walgreens it's also interesting like it [TS]

  regionally i think most stations that [TS]

  are buying reruns to fill the afternoon [TS]

  are not going to buy i'm guessing i'm [TS]

  not i can't say but I'll just say this [TS]

  to me [TS]

  you're either a monster's family or you [TS]

  were an Addams Family family and I [TS]

  didn't even see at the Adams family [TS]

  until I was probably in like what junior [TS]

  high I didn't notice because we always [TS]

  had monsters same-same absolutely same [TS]

  and I think anyone understands a better [TS]

  program who knows you who knows who can [TS]

  go back in time now and say what our [TS]

  lives would have been like if we've been [TS]

  watching The Addams Family instead of [TS]

  the monsters I don't want to think about [TS]

  moments together like magnets [TS]

  yeah because the monsters very very you [TS]

  know foundational yeah and the addams [TS]

  family as there's a lot of subtlety [TS]

  going on there [TS]

  you know they're very different [TS]

  different shows yeah gomez is like he's [TS]

  always smirking right yeah [TS]

  Herman's not smirking so what he could [TS]

  get his family came first I'm not gonna [TS]

  look it up [TS]

  I'm gonna stop staring because i was [TS]

  based on like those like New Yorker [TS]

  cartoons right yeah it's got em and [TS]

  families got a lot of class the monsters [TS]

  is because it is but its broader right [TS]

  its plan to the back of the room but I [TS]

  can't take it away i would like to point [TS]

  out John Astin's photo on wikipedia is [TS]

  taken from Petticoat Junction no kidding [TS]

  yeah so it's not even now it's not like [TS]

  oh it's not like a small moment in his [TS]

  life huh [TS]

  but I mean you would think he was Gomez [TS]

  you would think he would be that would [TS]

  be the picture that they would be you [TS]

  that we would know about but no it's [TS]

  like yeah maybe you can understand who [TS]

  decides what picture to use it is always [TS]

  been bewildering to me [TS]

  here's a question to you yeah have you [TS]

  looked at your Wikipedia page lately [TS]

  no do you know how it gets made [TS]

  not really i was sort of greenacres i do [TS]

  not have no interesting greenacres i [TS]

  don't i have never have not looked at my [TS]

  Wikipedia page in a long time and still [TS]

  haven't but it popped into my head the [TS]

  other day that it's out there [TS]

  yeah that it exists out there and that [TS]

  it's probably either wrong or poor it's [TS]

  in it's probably either i think it [TS]

  probably is impoverished you know what I [TS]

  mean I the first time I ever saw [TS]

  wikipedia page about me was written by a [TS]

  fan and it was in the early days of [TS]

  wikipedia where people could just coming [TS]

  maybe it's still too but they just wrote [TS]

  a bunch of stuff it was just like [TS]

  paragraphs and paragraphs long written [TS]

  in the style of like a magazine article [TS]

  that there was a time where where you [TS]

  know [TS]

  yeah i mean one thing obviously is if [TS]

  it's a very popular top god I don't know [TS]

  fuck all about this i don't know what [TS]

  I'm trying to comment on this but i do [TS]

  get the sense there's a lot more [TS]

  that the editing and sort of moderation [TS]

  has tightened up quite a lot so you [TS]

  don't get as much like weird abuse and [TS]

  stuff but you know if it's a topic that [TS]

  a lot of people care about and that [TS]

  there's a lot of interest in it there's [TS]

  a lot of expertise in mr. fantastic [TS]

  wikipedia pages out there it's all yeah [TS]

  you know and there but the thing is I [TS]

  think one thing is the people sort of [TS]

  adopted topics and sort of watch for [TS]

  changes and things [TS]

  yes IC IC right i think when i first was [TS]

  introduced to the concept of editing [TS]

  Wikipedia pages i was looking at the [TS]

  wikipedia page for the Starcaster [TS]

  fenders famously ill-advised competitor [TS]

  to the es-335 which I owned a copy of of [TS]

  which I owned a copy [TS]

  wow the Starcaster how you've seen me [TS]

  play my starcaster must look it up [TS]

  starcaster very unusual guitar i was [TS]

  working i was part me i was working at [TS]

  Emerald City guitars in seattle accept [TS]

  any yes 335 and wanted to kind of give [TS]

  it a little bit of the funky angle of [TS]

  the fender like give me like a little [TS]

  bit much dangle yeah they stretched it [TS]

  was strangely and like a Stratocaster [TS]

  yeah but three is a 335 so i was working [TS]

  at Emerald City guitars and it and and I [TS]

  had within the year purchased a 1968 [TS]

  telecaster with a factory Bigsby tremolo [TS]

  and it was the most fancy expensive [TS]

  guitar that I had owned ever since my [TS]

  original 1968 eat es-335 was stolen out [TS]

  of my own living room while i was [TS]

  sleeping man that happened a long time [TS]

  before but so this was a fancy guitar [TS]

  was very fancy but whenever I would play [TS]

  shows with it i like to play with my [TS]

  guitar kind of loud sounds the fashion [TS]

  at the time and this telecaster was very [TS]

  it was very feedback II remember this [TS]

  journal telecasters were were like all [TS]

  the feedback telecasters at least in my [TS]

  had had a Telecaster and I think one of [TS]

  the perform [TS]

  its characteristics for better for worse [TS]

  was they were not as you would say loud [TS]

  guitar and we did get loud they were [TS]

  pretty [TS]

  I don't know the term for it but yeah I [TS]

  would feedback pretty bad and yet a [TS]

  single coil not super heavily won't pick [TS]

  up and then we'll get the distinctive 20 [TS]

  sound it's that distinctive 20 sound or [TS]

  are we playing with jingle bells don't [TS]

  know at least answer there no I think [TS]

  it's just breaks [TS]

  o people break a lot around here oh oh [TS]

  right right breaks I thought you were [TS]

  talking about like drum brakes was like [TS]

  that was a cool drum brake right and and [TS]

  so people did all kinds of things like [TS]

  they invented humbuckers that would fit [TS]

  inside the single space of a telecaster [TS]

  pick up people would take their [TS]

  telecaster pickups out and dip them in [TS]

  wax I'm really didn't see more I feel [TS]

  like I remember seymour duncan is being [TS]

  a big deal because they had was the [TS]

  quarter pounder but they cannot put some [TS]

  pickup that where you could put enough [TS]

  was just seymour duncan but you could if [TS]

  you with the right amount of routing [TS]

  routing what you call it you know router [TS]

  making at all where you could get a [TS]

  humbucker a double pick up into the [TS]

  space of a single coil area right but it [TS]

  was tapped it was stacked it was on top [TS]

  of each other rather than side-by-side [TS]

  yeah and right and then of course there [TS]

  was the mother bucker which was a hammer [TS]

  invention which was three [TS]

  it was three pick three single-coil [TS]

  pickups together the motherfuckers that [TS]

  in gillette blade situation you get [TS]

  benefit from having those extras [TS]

  I well you know people aren't aren't [TS]

  still using them so i think it was just [TS]

  a thing that looked pretty hot i [TS]

  remember seeing it in a hammer guitar [TS]

  and thinking that looks pretty hot but [TS]

  for some reason to pick up version of [TS]

  rick nielsen having five neck guitar and [TS]

  Rick Nielson also famously played Hamer [TS]

  sledgehammers I bet he had one nice pull [TS]

  but uh but so now nobody plays that loud [TS]

  you can play the guitar you want i think [TS]

  but then every time I stepped on my [TS]

  distortion box this thing would just [TS]

  start squealing like what [TS]

  hey and it's been especially if you're [TS]

  on the detail pick up yeah and I at that [TS]

  point in time never used anything but [TS]

  the bridge pickup because i didn't [TS]

  understand what the neck pickup did I [TS]

  never touched the controls of a guitar [TS]

  or of the amp i just turned everything [TS]

  up all the way and then the only way I [TS]

  had really of expressing myself as an [TS]

  instrumentalist was stepping on the [TS]

  distortion pedal because i had no had no [TS]

  feel of any kind I couldn't you know I [TS]

  couldn't do anything with the guitar [TS]

  except the most brute like bet behavior [TS]

  yeah just like blank and this guitar was [TS]

  too crazy was like a scimitars it was [TS]

  beautiful [TS]

  I'm working I'm working at the guitar [TS]

  store one day and a guy comes in this [TS]

  used to happen all the time in the [TS]

  guitar store somebody a man woman comes [TS]

  in with a guitar case and you can see [TS]

  the case through the glass door when [TS]

  they're still on the sidewalk and you're [TS]

  like oh here comes a live one [TS]

  mhm because you see the case you know it [TS]

  is something and then you look at the [TS]

  person and you know that person does not [TS]

  belong with that guitar kings and so you [TS]

  adopt that cool kind of guide the guitar [TS]

  shopping you lean your elbow on the [TS]

  counter and you're like hey welcome to [TS]

  emerald city guitars how are you make [TS]

  them in all hey I found this guitar my [TS]

  grandfather's bed season for you know or [TS]

  my son went off to Vietnam and never [TS]

  came back and we have this guitar ever [TS]

  since or any kind of story like that [TS]

  you're like let's take a look at what [TS]

  kind of like a is this worth anything [TS]

  that yeah right i don't know what to do [TS]

  with that are bringing it down to the [TS]

  good i saw your ad in the penny nickel [TS]

  all right come on in and you know and [TS]

  you see the case and then you get that [TS]

  smell there's a certain smell that those [TS]

  old guitars had that if you're not into [TS]

  the smell of like it's sort of a little [TS]

  bit more bolly a little bit like sitting [TS]

  in the closet for all these years those [TS]

  cases were made out of tweed we flip it [TS]

  open and then inside is this guitar and [TS]

  sometimes it can be you know every once [TS]

  in awhile it is [TS]

  like a 54 stratocaster or a 57 les paul [TS]

  custom at which point everybody gasps [TS]

  and then the owner of the store like [TS]

  magically appears and gently puts his [TS]

  hand on everyone to him even if there [TS]

  are four of us working in the store he [TS]

  somehow manages to gently put his hand [TS]

  on all four of us and just push us away [TS]

  just like the monopoly man it is he's [TS]

  not just you know it's a risk guitar [TS]

  sources just like rock-and-roll dad you [TS]

  know he's got a shark tooth necklace or [TS]

  what everybody's like everybody go [TS]

  you know like I got this time the lean [TS]

  time to clean a minute we all step back [TS]

  and he's like hi thanks for coming in [TS]

  and then it's sort of like progresses [TS]

  into a different it takes a different [TS]

  form but a lot of times it will be the [TS]

  the guitar case would open and it would [TS]

  be a very interesting and cool guitar [TS]

  but not necessarily one that would bring [TS]

  the owner Jay down from his tower you [TS]

  know something like a mosrite or a oral [TS]

  later you know later fender I mean [TS]

  nowadays all that stuff is is is [TS]

  unobtainium right but but then it was [TS]

  like oh yeah guitar you know that's a I [TS]

  mean I bought that 68 Telecaster twelve [TS]

  hundred dollars and it seems like whoa [TS]

  1,200 bucks what kind of house are you [TS]

  spending twelve hundred dollars on [TS]

  guitar right you know you know you get [TS]

  perfectly good guitar for six hundred [TS]

  dollars and and people who are listening [TS]

  this program who are not in the guitar [TS]

  trades or even who are won't realize [TS]

  that well the people that are will [TS]

  realize but those guitars don't exist [TS]

  like that anymore nobody comes into a [TS]

  guitar store with a with something under [TS]

  their arm like that because the first [TS]

  thing everybody does google it and now [TS]

  he sure they're stupid 1999 fender [TS]

  squier is were heard of seventeen [TS]

  hundred dollars [TS]

  and so but at the time there was no [TS]

  resource like that was just like oh no [TS]

  it from this thing go boom and so one [TS]

  day a guy comes in the open this guitar [TS]

  case and it's this fender starcaster [TS]

  which none of us at the store had ever [TS]

  heard of obviously Jay had but the rest [TS]

  of us like younger guys never seen this [TS]

  thing before [TS]

  what the hell is it and a it was this [TS]

  ill-fated guitar fender tried to do this [TS]

  thing it was the nineteen seventies not [TS]

  the not the top era for fender or for [TS]

  anybody in America we couldn't make cars [TS]

  or guitar string the 72 started making [TS]

  them in 76 and they were done by 79 [TS]

  right well i mean i'm sure there was a [TS]

  light ale but the 76 to 80 20 * casters [TS]

  that's what it says they only made him [TS]

  for three years [TS]

  pretty pretty sure i'll say this its I [TS]

  mean like obviously for guitar person [TS]

  you know this but it's not the way you [TS]

  would like eyeball a strat this is not [TS]

  like a classic right no yeah it was and [TS]

  this was I think still at a time when [TS]

  Fender guitars of that era were derided [TS]

  ok so until until very recently like a [TS]

  77 stratocaster would spit on the floor [TS]

  maybe like clip 277 stratocaster that we [TS]

  call them record them call them what [TS]

  were they for bolt necks there was there [TS]

  was there was some menus now the three [TS]

  bolts [TS]

  well I forget it's been so long since i [TS]

  didn't since i did any kind of work like [TS]

  this but it was it was widely understood [TS]

  that those guitars were not very good [TS]

  now 77 stratocaster is worth a ton of [TS]

  money not no one even remembers a time [TS]

  when those were considered garbage [TS]

  because they're 40 years old and then [TS]

  you [TS]

  and they're not making they're not [TS]

  making any more new 40 year old guitars [TS]

  right right there the end of their [TS]

  precious and when you could no longer [TS]

  afford to 65 stratocaster and you could [TS]

  only afford a 72 stratocaster and then [TS]

  pretty soon he couldn't afford those so [TS]

  you so 79 stratocaster and now you know [TS]

  why I doubt you can afford that but this [TS]

  was from that era so a lot of people in [TS]

  the guitar shop [TS]

  we're like how what a strange curiosity [TS]

  it's kind of like a fender coronado to [TS]

  which is to say a guitar that I don't [TS]

  really care about and everybody's always [TS]

  walked away and and I'm left there with [TS]

  this thing like my god I'm so attracted [TS]

  to it and my the one that came into the [TS]

  store that day was root beer brown which [TS]

  again most people were most people in [TS]

  the guitar trades were like yeah not [TS]

  interested in a rootbeer colored guitar [TS]

  either especially not this like thing [TS]

  this thing this ugly thing that looks [TS]

  like i'm just looking like just just [TS]

  based on sort of aesthetics you're not [TS]

  sure like who's this for [TS]

  I mean Brants to be kind of a like a [TS]

  chet atkins kind of guitar like like if [TS]

  you're you know a successful local [TS]

  country musician you might want this but [TS]

  then it's got humbuckers right right [TS]

  yeah and it's but it's like who would [TS]

  this before in 1976 I mean you're gonna [TS]

  get a less fall if you can probably [TS]

  right well who-who fender imagined it [TS]

  was for was in the in the mid-seventies [TS]

  you got all these chick Korea's out [TS]

  there [TS]

  ok you got all these trainee Lopez's the [TS]

  you later later period training Lopez's [TS]

  you've got everybody's trying to do all [TS]

  these Jerry guard to see is everybody's [TS]

  trying to do something new with the [TS]

  guitar and there's a lot of jazz [TS]

  happening a lot of jazz guitar going on [TS]

  everybody's jazzy [TS]

  and they're jazzing it up and the 335i [TS]

  mean that's it that's a pretty valid [TS]

  question what is a 335 for it's the [TS]

  classic busy Tommy king [TS]

  yeah the blues brews but that doesn't [TS]

  like that's a bonafide classic that [TS]

  right oh yeah i mean a 59 335 is worth [TS]

  the in the multiple good costume or just [TS]

  what a gorgeous guitar beautiful thing [TS]

  so but fender never had one like that [TS]

  they tried to do this coronado thing [TS]

  back in the sixties notice not eat our [TS]

  John no no it's terrible and the [TS]

  Coronado's were made out of fiber port I [TS]

  mean they're not they were never [TS]

  intended them to be good but like Gibson [TS]

  always had a always cornered the market [TS]

  on the f whole semi hollow body detox [TS]

  right [TS]

  Gibson just cornered the market vendor [TS]

  never even tried but then in the [TS]

  seventies they were like hey man they're [TS]

  like a bad [TS]

  what if we did but if we did a [TS]

  hollow-body guitar and somebody at a [TS]

  inventor was like that's great idea you [TS]

  know because by then the company's been [TS]

  sold and Leo fender was living in a [TS]

  living in a in a Ford f-150 and so they [TS]

  did and they made it only for a couple [TS]

  years nobody bought it because as you [TS]

  say who wants it [TS]

  it did all the other thing that it had [TS]

  was a master volume knob on the guitar [TS]

  so you could set your different volumes [TS]

  of the pickups individually and then [TS]

  have faster that it's got a fist the [TS]

  wheel a fifth wheel [TS]

  Wow um oh my god you know what I have an [TS]

  ad an original ad from nineteen [TS]

  seventies guitar magazine hanging in my [TS]

  bathroom for the Starcaster and I'm I'm [TS]

  sorely tempted to jump up and go get it [TS]

  because it does have an alligator the [TS]

  the add you know there's there's no [TS]

  alligator but it does have it does have [TS]

  some copywriting that's very much of the [TS]

  moment of its moment i'm gonna get hang [TS]

  on a second ok key play some [TS]

  interstitial music sure this episode [TS]

  erotic on the line is brought to you by [TS]

  braintree code for easy mobile payments [TS]

  you can learn more right now by visiting [TS]

  braintree payments dot-com / supertrain [TS]

  maybe you're working on the next Boober [TS]

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  them become what they are today [TS]

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  you added to your app which is a few [TS]

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  to accept Apple pay android pay paypal [TS]

  venmo credit cards even Bitcoin and if [TS]

  some other way to pay comes along [TS]

  braintree will support that to here's [TS]

  the thing brain trinket country gives [TS]

  you a full stack payment solution that [TS]

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  with brain trees best-in-class mobile [TS]

  checkout experience please go and look [TS]

  at this for yourself you gotta go to [TS]

  braintree payments dot-com / supertrain [TS]

  our thanks to braintree for supporting a [TS]

  rock on the line and all the great shows [TS]

  right there still oh yeah okay here's [TS]

  what it says this is this one guitar was [TS]

  brand new Fender ushers in a new age in [TS]

  sound pure sound with minimum feedback [TS]

  more sound with a solid wood center [TS]

  block from maximum sustained two [TS]

  humbucking pickups now this is a thing [TS]

  that that's not really that that big of [TS]

  a selling point right by this point in [TS]

  time if you want if you're buying a [TS]

  guitar you know that it's gonna have to [TS]

  i'm backing pickups generally now that's [TS]

  not necessarily true offender but here [TS]

  we go [TS]

  crews from metallic to mellow and [TS]

  anywhere in between [TS]

  drive hard or lay back at the touch of a [TS]

  finger tip and now we're going to move [TS]

  on to the five knobs which is the real [TS]

  innovation no guitar ever had five mob [TS]

  Merlin nobody ever thought you could [TS]

  probably even out of this knob no no who [TS]

  would have no idea roger McGuinn would [TS]

  dream of assets knob who dared who you [TS]

  know but that's right [TS]

  who dares wins am i right who who's then [TS]

  they were like what we put a gift Bob [TS]

  but dual controls it says dual controls [TS]

  I have no idea what that I don't know [TS]

  what dual means in that context i'm [TS]

  guessing that means you can have this [TS]

  picked up with that pickup [TS]

  yeah right okay that's right that's what [TS]

  it means dual controls 5 stars2 steer by [TS]

  to individual pick up tone controls [TS]

  program like every guitar and thinks [TS]

  that click to and then to individual [TS]

  pick up volume controls / and like every [TS]

  window neck included that in print and [TS]

  then the last one and matt and this is [TS]

  so to individual pick up I'm controls [TS]

  period and then the next sentence begins [TS]

  with a capital and and master volume [TS]

  control and that's the thing that that's [TS]

  the thing that they were going to try [TS]

  and use as the big selling point for [TS]

  that I love that five stars to steer by [TS]

  every time I go to the bathroom [TS]

  look at that and I say five stars to [TS]

  steer by mmm that feels like that feels [TS]

  like that should be somebody's motto you [TS]

  can find so much more stuff with five [TS]

  stars and four stars five stars five [TS]

  stars to steer by one thing is at the [TS]

  time I don't think I don't think five [TS]

  star rating even existed all I see are [TS]

  seeing stars i get em you know because [TS]

  because it a five-star general is only [TS]

  that only happens in war time rather [TS]

  than absolutely yay for wartime general [TS]

  yeah that's right a wartime concealer [TS]

  Tom Higgins not a wartime general you [TS]

  don't there's no five-star general right [TS]

  now because there's no general of the [TS]

  there's no general of the armies which [TS]

  is like big guys the five stars that's [TS]

  what you get you get a MacArthur you get [TS]

  a patent you get out of 5 stars on that [TS]

  was never for all right if I call [TS]

  multiplicity get five stars [TS]

  no I don't think so for didn't I don't [TS]

  think you got but no I think it was [TS]

  eisenhower and and macarthur mhm [TS]

  I mean you know every once awhile they [TS]

  keep 12 a car because he was you know [TS]

  he'd been around a long time but I think [TS]

  I think Washington also get doesn't [TS]

  Washington get like some kind of the [TS]

  secret bonus star about George [TS]

  Washington yeah i think back then every [TS]

  time they give you a new rank they just [TS]

  gave you like a bag of gold all that you [TS]

  come from your sleeve [TS]

  I feel like I read which I think we [TS]

  talked about this one so I feel like he [TS]

  was posthumously given something along [TS]

  the lines of no matter how many stars [TS]

  anybody ever gets Washington always has [TS]

  one more [TS]

  how interesting because he's the OG I [TS]

  thought you were going to say it was [TS]

  like the posthumous the weather Mormons [TS]

  baptize their ancestors ok could be [TS]

  could be similar [TS]

  yeah you know that you know that you [TS]

  know that that is a that's kind of a a [TS]

  one of the one of the deals [TS]

  yes the yeah you know we talked about [TS]

  know it's it's it's it's fascinating so [TS]

  they got 5 stars2 22 guide by the and i [TS]

  found is very seventies looking and it [TS]

  has the guitar turning into an alligator [TS]

  oh you you were referring to one that [TS]

  you were even then looking at the [TS]

  hard-charging sharp to starcaster first [TS]

  heard emerging from the spectral depths [TS]

  of creation in 1976 starcaster have been [TS]

  is the great grey-green greasy limpopo [TS]

  what whatever that is and what Leslie [TS]

  climbs the charts its attack is [TS]

  heightened by a unique semi hollow body [TS]

  and job-hopping vocal range which is [TS]

  which makes it a prize trophy among and [TS]

  a musicologist uh-huh and musicologist [TS]

  yeah [TS]

  did you know that john astin is [TS]

  currently teaching acting at johns [TS]

  hopkins university on asking is alive [TS]

  he's not only a lot but currently [TS]

  teaching acting that's fantastic [TS]

  yeah he's trying to reestablish the the [TS]

  acting school at Johns Hopkins good for [TS]

  him [TS]

  johns hopkins you know now is thought of [TS]

  primarily as science school but but as a [TS]

  long and storied history in the arts so [TS]

  Jay was that his name he comes down from [TS]

  his tower oj anyway came down and I was [TS]

  like I love this guitar I want this [TS]

  guitar and he said oh I don't know ma'am [TS]

  that's pretty cool guitar because Jay [TS]

  was a wheeler-dealer he always wheelie [TS]

  wheeler-dealer and even those of us the [TS]

  work for him because he was only [TS]

  planning business that's telling you [TS]

  yeah exactly yeah yeah it's just like if [TS]

  you work at the car lot [TS]

  it's not like you get the honda civic [TS]

  for free you gotta turn and start [TS]

  negotiating with the with the salesman [TS]

  one [TS]

  double up so James like I don't know i [TS]

  don't mean it's pretty nice guitar and I [TS]

  was like wow I mean it's root beer brown [TS]

  and no one has one and it's ridiculous [TS]

  looking and he was like yeah i know but [TS]

  like I could probably get eighteen [TS]

  hundred dollars for that he would have [TS]

  said that that would have been [TS]

  outrageous amount of money but I said [TS]

  what if I trade you that telecaster for [TS]

  it and he I think recognize that that [TS]

  was a good deal and he said sold as you [TS]

  can so move a telecaster oh yeah and [TS]

  that telecaster now 68 Telecaster with [TS]

  the the factory Bigsby that's worth a [TS]

  ton of money a lot more than the [TS]

  Starcaster probably anyway I played for [TS]

  a long time the Starcaster it was like [TS]

  one of my that was one of my signature [TS]

  guitars and then Chris wala of death cab [TS]

  for cutie liked it so much that his [TS]

  bandmates bought him one as a present [TS]

  since he was playing his but a lot more [TS]

  prominently that I was and then at a [TS]

  certain moment there [TS]

  wikipedia arrived upon the scene and [TS]

  everybody was on there be no filling out [TS]

  people's wikipedia pages and you know [TS]

  mine was had all this baloney on it like [TS]

  grew up in the you know he used to live [TS]

  at 1,800 stanford in a land Anchorage [TS]

  Alaska I was like what is that doing [TS]

  there but it was written by a fan you [TS]

  know and and I didn't understand how [TS]

  things work but then i went to the [TS]

  Starcaster page one day because i wanted [TS]

  to know about star casters as much as I [TS]

  could find and down at the bottom of the [TS]

  page it said prominent starcaster users [TS]

  and I was like prominent starcaster [TS]

  users who are these people and it was it [TS]

  was Chris wala and then some [TS]

  oh and jonny greenwood Chris wall and [TS]

  Johnny Green will hit starcaster and [TS]

  then like a couple of other guys and I [TS]

  said you know i'm i'm a prominent [TS]

  starcaster usually there aren't that [TS]

  many of us [TS]

  sure and so I had just had just gotten I [TS]

  just dropped the concept that you could [TS]

  change a Wikipedia page [TS]

  and so I satin figured it out and pushed [TS]

  on the Edit thing and went down and got [TS]

  figured out the HTML the XHTML Yeah [TS]

  right right and and ipad my name [TS]

  no kidding right there big biggest day [TS]

  prominent starcaster user and then I [TS]

  went back two days later it was gone [TS]

  yeah I was like fuck I'm prominence [TS]

  doncaster user yeah like I got a record [TS]

  I you know my current record is number [TS]

  four on the cmj huh [TS]

  but if i put it back put my name back [TS]

  there and get the warning that week [TS]

  later it was gone and I was like you [TS]

  know [TS]

  alright I surrender I don't know who's [TS]

  making these decisions [TS]

  somebody's like why and I assumed it was [TS]

  one of two things either they were like [TS]

  who made that it oh the guy and right [TS]

  even if it's true even if even if Dwight [TS]

  David Eisenhower goes on and says I was [TS]

  general of the army [TS]

  they're going to say you can edit your [TS]

  own Wikipedia page sorry right right or [TS]

  it was somebody that was like who's this [TS]

  guy and then they went and looked at my [TS]

  Wikipedia page where somebody was [TS]

  talking about you know that i played [TS]

  wiffle ball in in elementary school and [TS]

  they were like this guy's just he's just [TS]

  some wiffle ball guy he's not a [TS]

  prominent starcaster user I don't know [TS]

  what this is a long time ago but but [TS]

  that ended that was the beginning and [TS]

  the end of me making any kind of [TS]

  wikipedia entry because I realized that [TS]

  I was not at some level i was getting i [TS]

  was somebody was stepping on my neck and [TS]

  I didn't want to play that game in the [TS]

  screwgy the screwgy we I mean like you [TS]

  know I think one of my time here said [TS]

  derived from screwed [TS]

  I think I made I made to edits ever you [TS]

  have you are you looking through a file [TS]

  yeah you do and see what I've changed [TS]

  I've made to edits Oh both in the fall [TS]

  2008 what were their looks like i [TS]

  corrected the release date of protect [TS]

  your neck by wu-tang clan [TS]

  they had it at 1950 30 and I i changed [TS]

  it to 1993 yeah um and then on the on [TS]

  the page for brilliant corners by [TS]

  felonious monk it looks like i linked to [TS]

  the the page for Orion keep news from [TS]

  the personnel area see if they'll see if [TS]

  the state up is still there yeah look at [TS]

  that look at you [TS]

  yeah like a Wikipedia wouldn't be the [TS]

  same without you actually agree yeah [TS]

  producer producer of the million corners [TS]

  well i-i-i sometimes I got onto this [TS]

  quora alright let's talk about this [TS]

  have I told you about this no I haven't [TS]

  heard about core i-i-i feel like I will [TS]

  go to court and because i don't have an [TS]

  account it wasn't allowed to see the [TS]

  answers for things and I don't know that [TS]

  still a thing but i haven't gone back [TS]

  very much [TS]

  well i don't i don't know how so I have [TS]

  no I have no idea how Korra ended up in [TS]

  my life right one day I got an email [TS]

  huh that suggested that i was a [TS]

  long-standing member and it said hey [TS]

  here's some core articles that might [TS]

  interest you and it was all about tanks [TS]

  wow like the history of Tanks a tank [TS]

  battles tank warfare people asking [TS]

  questions like what would happen if I [TS]

  opened a pepsi and then put a mouthful [TS]

  of pop rocks but I was in a tank [TS]

  mm or if you took one m1 Abrams and [TS]

  pitted against like 40 Sherman tanks who [TS]

  would win like always kind of questions [TS]

  that you only get on Quora and I was [TS]

  like why am I getting this email but I [TS]

  was interested i did i really wasn't [TS]

  this is there a chance that you had [TS]

  signed up and forgot about it [TS]

  no because I wouldn't have it wouldn't [TS]

  have signed up for thing that had that [TS]

  said like what are your what are your [TS]

  major interests and offered me 80 [TS]

  options and I and all i clicked was [TS]

  tanks like that's not a thing even if I [TS]

  was still drinking [TS]

  that's not a thing I would [TS]

  and it felt a little bit like somebody [TS]

  signing me up on a mailing list where [TS]

  I'm getting weird junk mail all the time [TS]

  telling her like yeah like subscribed [TS]

  somebody subscribe me to like tank [TS]

  drivers digest or something [TS]

  yeah but whether where I was coming in [TS]

  the real mail but it was in my email I [TS]

  don't know why it happened but then I [TS]

  got really interested in it and then I [TS]

  sort of drove into Korra but i didn't i [TS]

  did go in one time in and fill out a [TS]

  form that had all of my interests and I [TS]

  was like you know history and politics [TS]

  and lots of tears burn talking with your [TS]

  lips pursed like this with the web or [TS]

  should I want to know about everything [TS]

  and the emails and stuff that kept [TS]

  coming we're just all about tanks but [TS]

  never this is never interesting [TS]

  yeah it never changed how long i just [TS]

  saw how long ago was this [TS]

  it's been two years now that and [TS]

  gradually over time it has expanded to [TS]

  include special forces ops and other [TS]

  like just I mean it's basically the [TS]

  quora topic list of an eleven-year-old [TS]

  right like what would happen what would [TS]

  happen if if the USS enterprise and [TS]

  forty marine recon operatives all had [TS]

  all had to choose a rabbit down a hole [TS]

  who would win and it was just like wow I [TS]

  NSI read and read and read them because [TS]

  yeah out if this is coming in my email [TS]

  inbox like i'm not i'm not going to stop [TS]

  it I'm who am I to stand with work [TS]

  history and yell stop but it was too [TS]

  gettin somethin right to tickle your [TS]

  interest bone but but but one of the [TS]

  things that I wonder is if if i had [TS]

  started getting emails from Cora on any [TS]

  topic would i have had pretty much the [TS]

  same reaction like huh that's [TS]

  interesting i'm getting all these weird [TS]

  emails now from Cora about [TS]

  farming um but it's really interesting [TS]

  I mean I think anything that anything [TS]

  that came in that form was like this is [TS]

  a very specific thing every time you get [TS]

  one of these emails are going to be like [TS]

  answers to 10 questions and and you can [TS]

  get in and get out like it's just me but [TS]

  it's like you know if you think about [TS]

  the way you do like a medium got a cold [TS]

  reading where there's a certain set of [TS]

  things that you can observe or say to [TS]

  somebody that's very likely to get their [TS]

  interest the delt they'll find the [TS]

  meaning and what it is but tank seems [TS]

  pretty on the nose [TS]

  well but not necessarily right like I [TS]

  don't know if you don't know if you [TS]

  listen to the the food safety podcast [TS]

  they did with non Schaffner i think i [TS]

  did but i was surprised that i had a lot [TS]

  of questions about food safety i had the [TS]

  same experience right when you did that [TS]

  podcast and you get on there and you're [TS]

  like no wait a minute let's get this how [TS]

  many aspects of my life the food safety [TS]

  touched and I finally I but you know you [TS]

  get specific in like you're in a room [TS]

  with somebody like that you like that [TS]

  you know what actually I do have [TS]

  questions like tell me the deal with [TS]

  ground beef know what is the deal with [TS]

  ground beef how much ecoli is actually [TS]

  meant well apparently according to [TS]

  according to our friends on that show [TS]

  you gotta be careful because you can get [TS]

  United beefs oh yeah oh yeah they were [TS]

  coming in general they they ended up [TS]

  saying yeah every bit of food out there [TS]

  is poisonous you just have to decide how [TS]

  much how much risk you're willing to [TS]

  take and your brain a little bit but it [TS]

  was like I was on there to talk about [TS]

  that you know sous-vide cooking for one [TS]

  thing like we're cooking a water bath [TS]

  where there's this whole different model [TS]

  i eat in the bath all the time you're [TS]

  saying you cooking number [TS]

  oh sorry it's a different slightly [TS]

  different thing but there's no idea of [TS]

  where they called kinetics the way the [TS]

  kinetics work which I don't really [TS]

  understand but like by the time we were [TS]

  like half an hour into that show my mind [TS]

  felt bent because i realize how little I [TS]

  actually understood about this and here [TS]

  we are two people who actually did [TS]

  understand it and right in there they're [TS]

  very articulate about entertaining and [TS]

  the depth that big [TS]

  icic what you're saying but it wasn't [TS]

  like you had a profile up on corner and [TS]

  there's no profile of me in existence [TS]

  that ever mentions a tank because even [TS]

  if I even as a military history buff [TS]

  even as a super military hardware nerd [TS]

  tanks are absolutely at the bottom of [TS]

  what I'm interested in [TS]

  I'm interested in airplanes i'm [TS]

  interested in boats i'm interested in [TS]

  strategy i'm interested in i'm [TS]

  interested in guns i'm interested in [TS]

  uniforms before I am interested in tanks [TS]

  ok and they and all that stuff is way [TS]

  way below my interest in like I mean I'm [TS]

  more interested in bows and arrows five [TS]

  there it was and I was getting into it [TS]

  and so that there's another thing i [TS]

  signed up for a UH an email from a guy [TS]

  in England called worldwide words [TS]

  oh yeah already talked about this and [TS]

  it's just one of those etymology [TS]

  podcasts where you're like this is [TS]

  interesting where did that word come [TS]

  from and and and so what I realized is [TS]

  that what these things are doing for me [TS]

  is I don't actually have that many [TS]

  doorways into the internet like Laura [TS]

  yes okay yes I know what you mean and [TS]

  it's different than five or ten years [TS]

  ago where there's like it seems like [TS]

  there's an increasingly smaller number [TS]

  of apertures to get you into something [TS]

  yeah yeah well I mean I sit and look at [TS]

  my phone all day but when you really [TS]

  look at what I'm doing I'm only looking [TS]

  at five places on the internet i'm [TS]

  looking at i'm looking at Twitter i'm [TS]

  looking at my email i'm looking at a [TS]

  couple of games i play regularly i [TS]

  occasionally and begrudgingly go to [TS]

  facebook i go to instagram i do a little [TS]

  snap chatting right but all of that is a [TS]

  lot of it is broadcasting and looking at [TS]

  what my friends are doing but I'm not [TS]

  like it like there was a time when I [TS]

  would go to likelike seven different [TS]

  news sites every day Yeah Yeah right and [TS]

  I and I only get to news sites via [TS]

  Twitter I mean I use Twitter primarily [TS]

  now as a as a link aggregator but like [TS]

  you you you would send me things like [TS]

  here's wolfrum app Alfre wrong reform [TS]

  real fur [TS]

  very cognizant and it'll tell you it'll [TS]

  tell you like what the mean deviation of [TS]

  the number of bugs in your food is what [TS]

  I don't even remember what the hell that [TS]

  site did but but I was always looking [TS]

  like when I would go to medium it just [TS]

  seemed like oh here's a bunch of blogs i [TS]

  don't want to read other people's blogs [TS]

  like I didn't have a way I still don't [TS]

  have a way to really like suck the [TS]

  marrow out of the internet and so [TS]

  worldwide words was always a thing that [TS]

  would get me going and I'd say well now [TS]

  wait a minute how does how did the War [TS]

  of the Roses pertain to the two how that [TS]

  were suddenly fell into the parlance and [TS]

  then I was off to the races right [TS]

  wikipedia things a wikipedia is the [TS]

  other major major place that I spend [TS]

  time and lately I've been buying a lot [TS]

  of filson jackets on ebay but let's [TS]

  leave that aside because that's [TS]

  embarrassing that counts that's an [TS]

  aperture I don't like it though I don't [TS]

  like it I don't want to be on ebay I'm [TS]

  embarrassed to be there [TS]

  I've become one of those people that [TS]

  goes on ebay and and is the first bid on [TS]

  like 90 things a bit like 20 bucks [TS]

  the idea is to be the last one right [TS]

  yeah I go on in like twenty bucks and [TS]

  then and and I think it's just because [TS]

  I'm lonely and I want to get emails from [TS]

  ebay telling me I've been outbid [TS]

  yeah so I'm going to box 20 bucks for [TS]

  everything and I guess I'm hoping that [TS]

  one of these things will be like people [TS]

  won't go on ebay that day or something [TS]

  and no one will see it and I'll get it [TS]

  for twenty dollars that never happens [TS]

  do you like that you like that part of [TS]

  ebay do you like the the bidding part of [TS]

  it is that so exciting to you [TS]

  you mean like leasing someone two-bit no [TS]

  I don't like it at all because they're [TS]

  just want you want the thing you're not [TS]

  there for that game [TS]

  no I want the thing and i'm always [TS]

  infuriated when I did a hundred and [TS]

  fifty dollars on something and then the [TS]

  person wins it [TS]

  451 dollars it makes me mad because [TS]

  hundred fifty dollars and a hundred $51 [TS]

  is not that different but I wasn't [TS]

  prepared to bit [TS]

  280 and I'm not prepared to download one [TS]

  of those like last-minute building [TS]

  programs [TS]

  everyone's always something really [TS]

  matters to me i will remember when the [TS]

  thing ends and I will I will go to my [TS]

  computer at that moment and I'll sit on [TS]

  my little tuffet and i'll wait until the [TS]

  last seconds and then all right get into [TS]

  this combat with what I imagine is [TS]

  someone else but it's probably just [TS]

  bought yeah and and I i almost always [TS]

  lose and then I'm mad i stomp around i [TS]

  lost a thing of the day they're not [TS]

  stopping around for a long time blame [TS]

  you but and that also is an aperture [TS]

  into the internet because I'll see [TS]

  things that I don't recognize and i will [TS]

  say oh that's cool and then I'll google [TS]

  what they are and then I'm going on then [TS]

  I go down that rabbit hole but but the [TS]

  that the tank thing has been a it's been [TS]

  very interesting because it's like I it [TS]

  brings me in to the web and news does [TS]

  not I am NOT interested in news because [TS]

  for a long long time I felt like news is [TS]

  garbage and now especially news is [TS]

  garbage there i like to go to feature [TS]

  articles i like a feature article but i [TS]

  do not want to know I do not want news [TS]

  aggregated for me I don't like it it's [TS]

  not it's not good for the soul but i [TS]

  don't have an aggregator that that that [TS]

  especially works for me i haven't [TS]

  programmed something because how can you [TS]

  how can you go on and say like I want to [TS]

  read the most fascinating articles about [TS]

  everything [TS]

  yeah it's difficult to automate [TS]

  serendipity yeah yeah yeah yeah how do [TS]

  you how do you get how do you find a way [TS]

  I thought about this a fair amount and I [TS]

  mean I think about in the meeting at the [TS]

  very beginning of when I was on the [TS]

  internet but like when things were [TS]

  getting really interesting by jose 96 97 [TS]

  and yahoo was where you would go to find [TS]

  stuff talk to accuse about this about [TS]

  how back then you know you did not have [TS]

  even if you want to something like all [TS]

  TV star like a good search engine it was [TS]

  still not as reliable as going somewhere [TS]

  curated like yahoo because unlike a [TS]

  search engine and people call Yahoo [TS]

  search engine it had search [TS]

  functionality but yeah I was [TS]

  the directory and was kind of for a long [TS]

  time it was the internet for us [TS]

  consumers it was the you know canonical [TS]

  directory of stuff and it was curated [TS]

  and so what what what what i would do [TS]

  that this is a an interesting skill that [TS]

  kind of still sticks with me to this day [TS]

  whether this [TS]

  whether this [TS]

  categories on wikipedia or whatever it's [TS]

  not going to find something simple like [TS]

  I'll go and find it i want to find [TS]

  something in general and so i'll go to [TS]

  an area i'll find something that's [TS]

  similar to what i think i might want to [TS]

  know about and now look at stuff kind of [TS]

  around that time getting given category [TS]

  and this is why for example like i said [TS]

  this is why wikipedia categories are one [TS]

  of my favorite things whether I don't [TS]

  know what those are well it's difficult [TS]

  on your phone because you won't see this [TS]

  in the mobile view unless you turn off [TS]

  mobile view but the bottom of the page [TS]

  you'll see categories and you'll see [TS]

  what [TS]

  so you'll either see things like the [TS]

  look if there's a portal for this thing [TS]

  like if you're going in and you're [TS]

  reading about a duration of the [TS]

  Eucharist or whatever you'll see that's [TS]

  part of this giant collection called [TS]

  Catholicism and that might i'm not this [TS]

  is in front of me right now but you [TS]

  might see only his other kinds of things [TS]

  that are you know sacred or sacraments [TS]

  or whatever but it's a great way to like [TS]

  not just I'm not sure exactly how to put [TS]

  this instead of searching horizontally [TS]

  your sort of searching vertically so you [TS]

  can go and see like prominence [TS]

  starcaster users not as a section of [TS]

  pros but as like a programmatic like [TS]

  when you click here you will get to a [TS]

  page with all of these things and they [TS]

  might even like I say there might even [TS]

  be like a portal about it it's all about [TS]

  this particular topic so that it uses so [TS]

  I guess what I'm trying to say is that [TS]

  like as a survival tactic to find stuff [TS]

  on the internet or locate what you [TS]

  thought you wanted on the internet at [TS]

  first you have to be a little bit of a [TS]

  detective where you had to go in and [TS]

  evaluate what your options were and then [TS]

  find things that were around it and now [TS]

  today if you know exactly what you want [TS]

  that's not difficult to find exactly [TS]

  what you want but it's more like you [TS]

  know tell me the things I don't know and [TS]

  also where'd you find those discovery [TS]

  mechanism time you learn about the [TS]

  apertures that you never would have [TS]

  known about Roland someone knocking on [TS]

  my door which never happened [TS]

  no dear and so let's go over and find [TS]

  out what's going on all right [TS]

  John's gonna go over and down it's a [TS]

  little bit mr. Rogers here constant [TS]

  addresses visitor [TS]

  hello oh hi [TS]

  it's sort of the phone [TS]

  yeah it's a form of phone it's okay go [TS]

  ahead [TS]

  yeah there has been none but if I do I [TS]

  will let you know I do have your number [TS]

  mm-hmm that's not the point [TS]

  the plot thickens so the other day I [TS]

  need to cut that out [TS]

  no no not at all ok the other the other [TS]

  day I'm sitting here in my house [TS]

  yeah and oh yeah your home right now i'm [TS]

  at my house okay [TS]

  the and also a two things to technology [TS]

  related things today I'm going after [TS]

  this podcast to my office to get the [TS]

  internet restored their fine good [TS]

  also i'm thinking about leaving AT&T but [TS]

  we can talk about that separately does [TS]

  that it does that interest you at all i [TS]

  was getting a seltzer [TS]

  yes and in fact haha I'm glad to see [TS]

  that we have now we've just abandon all [TS]

  pretense that we're not just going to [TS]

  the refrigerator during the show [TS]

  well someone's got to get my bucket you [TS]

  know there's all kinds of things I gotta [TS]

  do okay so hang on a minute let me let [TS]

  me let me a traceback yourself so is [TS]

  somebody who has a question about phone [TS]

  and activity you're thinking about [TS]

  leaving AT&T and second that's third and [TS]

  then second and you're going to get your [TS]

  internet fixed at the office right so [TS]

  I'm going to go back to the office i'm [TS]

  not going to be here with the dishwasher [TS]

  running behind me while I'm podcasting [TS]

  ok cool but anyway so she's like all of [TS]

  us might might potentially get a lot [TS]

  more useful if you got the internet [TS]

  again [TS]

  exactamundo my friend and the problem [TS]

  with getting the internet restored there [TS]

  was that the internet people were like [TS]

  well great well we'll come you know week [TS]

  from next wednesday anytime between 9am [TS]

  and 7pm sound like cereal go sit in this [TS]

  room with no internet for a while [TS]

  yeah go sit in your office with no [TS]

  internet and make you know do some make [TS]

  work all day while we decide when to [TS]

  come and I was like it doesn't work that [TS]

  I want the internet was down there we [TS]

  can't do it without you there and I'm [TS]

  like yes you can you put it in when I [TS]

  wasn't there anyway I finally thought [TS]

  I'm going down there that you can use [TS]

  logic on those people [TS]

  I'm going down there right after i get [TS]

  off the phone with you and I'm gonna sit [TS]

  there all day in my office waiting for [TS]

  them and then i'm going to get the [TS]

  internet and lot of my problems will be [TS]

  solved from then on [TS]

  also i'm thinking about leaving 18 [TS]

  people will get back to that there's a [TS]

  knock on my door about a week ago which [TS]

  never happens [TS]

  I don't like it when it happens what are [TS]

  you doing here how did you get inside my [TS]

  gate my fence is falling down by the way [TS]

  that's number four [TS]

  so I open the door and there are two [TS]

  people standing on a man and woman [TS]

  standing on the porch and they have a [TS]

  very distinctive look with distinctive [TS]

  to me which is that look of women are [TS]

  these people my age are they older or [TS]

  younger than me i can't tell because [TS]

  they're from a different culture they [TS]

  are white people but she is wearing a [TS]

  washington state cougars sweatshirt and [TS]

  as you know i went to the university of [TS]

  washington i'm a husky okay and they're [TS]

  Cougars there from the Agricultural [TS]

  College from across the state and right [TS]

  away they just they seem like they're [TS]

  sort of suburban people there Suburbans [TS]

  and it's like are we the same age I [TS]

  cannot tell because you seem older than [TS]

  me because you are like a married couple [TS]

  who are living a life you're living a [TS]

  college sweatshirt that's that's going [TS]

  to tell exactly right you're wearing a [TS]

  college pitcher but you are clearly [TS]

  living a life of adulthood where you [TS]

  became adults earlier than I did [TS]

  sure like I became an adult somewhere [TS]

  around the 41 42 ok [TS]

  arguably they became adults you can just [TS]

  see it on and they became adults when [TS]

  they were 21 [TS]

  yeah and so they're standing on my porch [TS]

  and I'm like Hello [TS]

  normally when there's a knock on the [TS]

  door at my house first of all it's not [TS]

  white people and so just the fact that [TS]

  they're white people is a unusual second [TS]

  cougar sweatshirt which is very it's [TS]

  just jen [TS]

  really just sort of unusual and they [TS]

  look like adults and I'm like hello how [TS]

  may I help you how many serve you today [TS]

  and she leans in conspiratorial II and [TS]

  she says the house across the street by [TS]

  which she means the house where Gary [TS]

  lives in the house where Skeeter used to [TS]

  live before he died of cirrhosis right [TS]

  she said we just bought that house [TS]

  that's auction [TS]

  well and I was like what and she said [TS]

  yeah it was foreclosed two foreclosed [TS]

  upon two years ago and they've been [TS]

  living there ever since and we just [TS]

  bought a like a police auction basically [TS]

  Wow and I said who the how and she was [TS]

  like so like what's the deal with the [TS]

  house across the street huh [TS]

  okay and I looked across the street and [TS]

  I've told you I think that they can [TS]

  within the last year built a fence which [TS]

  they forgot to put a gate him right they [TS]

  built a fence because they were worried [TS]

  neighborhood kids were breaking into [TS]

  their house and stealing stuff when in [TS]

  fact the neighborhood kids were not they [TS]

  were either pawning that stuff and [TS]

  forgetting they were bonding it or their [TS]

  friends were stealing it [TS]

  you know there's no way you had concerns [TS]

  for a long time about the the foot [TS]

  traffic in and out of the house while [TS]

  that lady was maybe a deckhand a bedroom [TS]

  or something no yeah i was like sketch [TS]

  sketch Rama but instead of instead of [TS]

  starting the bleeding in terms of like [TS]

  don't let these people come by they [TS]

  built a huge huge fence across the [TS]

  entire front of their house and they [TS]

  forgot to put a gate in it [TS]

  I mean they put it like a big gate for [TS]

  the car that immediately sag to the [TS]

  point that it couldn't be opened but [TS]

  they didn't put a human gait and so no [TS]

  one could get in or out [TS]

  they didn't realize this until the day [TS]

  that the fence was finished and then it [TS]

  was like it was like wait a minute we [TS]

  can't get in around so they so they had [TS]

  someone come and then put a gate isn't a [TS]

  pretty significant design flaw that a [TS]

  fence person would be thinking about [TS]

  well the person that built the fence [TS]

  I happen to know was not a fence person [TS]

  he was a guy who came by one day in a [TS]

  truck that said [TS]

  we'll haul junk okay and he was there to [TS]

  haul some junk out of her place and [TS]

  while he was there they got into a [TS]

  conversation she was like I need offense [TS]

  and he said I'll build your friend mr. [TS]

  chain-link fence [TS]

  no it's a fence made out of boards it's [TS]

  a cedar fence [TS]

  Wow but not inexpensively done one you [TS]

  know one where guy who hauls Trump was [TS]

  target i can get all those parts define [TS]

  make a pretty good deal for you made a [TS]

  good deal and then once he was there and [TS]

  then I you know I would come by and [TS]

  saying you're making good progress on [TS]

  the fence and then he would turn his [TS]

  attention to my house and say you know I [TS]

  could I could build your windmill and I [TS]

  said you know not i'm not not interested [TS]

  in having windmill on my property but I [TS]

  don't think you're the guy if I'm gonna [TS]

  build a windmill it's going to be up [TS]

  it's going to be a licensed and bonded [TS]

  windmill builder but let's leave that [TS]

  aside so after they put up the fence and [TS]

  after a jury-rigged a gate into it then [TS]

  all of a sudden much signs showed up on [TS]

  the fence that said security cameras in [TS]

  effect [TS]

  beware of dog like you know that don't [TS]

  don't be don't be aware of dog beware of [TS]

  owner don't beware of owner beware of [TS]

  chemtrails like signs saber-rattling [TS]

  yeah [TS]

  do not do not enter no trespassing on [TS]

  private property no parking like a lot [TS]

  of signs they just went to the store and [TS]

  they got every sign that said no on him [TS]

  and they stapled them up all over this [TS]

  fence and let me tell you it really [TS]

  raises the the whole look and feel of [TS]

  the neighborhood I'm like just shy of [TS]

  like a radiation simple right [TS]

  yeah they didn't go that far they didn't [TS]

  say you know there's there's nothing in [TS]

  a foreign language there's nothing has [TS]

  octomom on it but you know like it's [TS]

  only because they didn't have those [TS]

  signs at the at the loews so the woman [TS]

  in this in the Cougar sweatshirt is [TS]

  standing on my porch and she's gesturing [TS]

  over should you know gesturing with a [TS]

  thumb over her shoulder like what the [TS]

  hey we just bought this house [TS]

  what can you tell me about it [TS]

  and I said well let's just say that the [TS]

  signs are more suggestive of like a [TS]

  general on the other side of the fence [TS]

  there's a general mood and the signs are [TS]

  more suggestive of the mood than they [TS]

  are of any actual surveillance dogs guns [TS]

  or anything else Gary is very [TS]

  unpredictable but also also very [TS]

  predictable in that you can predict that [TS]

  every night at one o'clock in the [TS]

  morning you'll be standing in the middle [TS]

  of the street yelling at the moon and [TS]

  he's mad at the moon because the moon [TS]

  took his kids but otherwise I mean I [TS]

  don't know what to tell you [TS]

  so that was big news because I've gone [TS]

  on the internet this is another portal [TS]

  to the Internet [TS]

  I've got on the internet and I've done a [TS]

  property record search and I knew that [TS]

  the house was in foreclosure but it had [TS]

  been in foreclosure a long time and in [TS]

  washington state at least your house can [TS]

  be foreclosed upon and you can continue [TS]

  to live there for a long time and [TS]

  surprised on and so I was like well you [TS]

  know it's just [TS]

  times are changing over there I don't [TS]

  want I don't want her to lose the house [TS]

  but I also don't want Gary living in the [TS]

  front yard and his fan anymore [TS]

  yeah nothing against Kerry I just don't [TS]

  you know if somebody in this [TS]

  neighborhood is going to yell at the [TS]

  mood about how it took his kids I wanted [TS]

  to be me [TS]

  yeah yeah anyway so now the home is [TS]

  owned but can I mean you know it's a [TS]

  long time to kind of have to put up with [TS]

  that [TS]

  yeah and I mean once I became once i [TS]

  became good pals with Gary and [TS]

  understood his travails my sympathy for [TS]

  him kept me from a calling the police [TS]

  it kept me from threatening to call the [TS]

  police because I I'm not a person that [TS]

  wants to threaten to call the police [TS]

  yeah because it's not something that you [TS]

  need to threaten if you're all the way [TS]

  to the point of calling the police then [TS]

  column you and I've been around [TS]

  block on this police thing oh yeah i [TS]

  think it's it seems like there's am at [TS]

  least if you're kind of raised in the [TS]

  suburbs impulse of treating the police [TS]

  sort of like your dad you know it might [TS]

  don't call the police on let's well that [TS]

  there's this sense of like well yeah but [TS]

  like there's something suspicious here [TS]

  or something i'm not comfortable with [TS]

  and I need them to go like check it out [TS]

  for me yeah right order and even my like [TS]

  it's something suspicious and I'm not [TS]

  comfortable with it all go check it out [TS]

  you might know something where it's like [TS]

  these people need to be arrested or [TS]

  somebody looked clear and present danger [TS]

  right then you call the police and you [TS]

  say without you know in no uncertain [TS]

  terms police [TS]

  here's the problem right get my and you [TS]

  know when my next door neighbor was out [TS]

  in the street firing his pistol in the [TS]

  air i didn't call the police because I [TS]

  find him to be a reasonable man [TS]

  accepting his daughter had snuck out [TS]

  alright yeah some guy it snuck into his [TS]

  daughter's room that is ok jumped out [TS]

  the window and onto the roof and down [TS]

  into the street and that seem reasonable [TS]

  to me of course your fire pistol and his [TS]

  reasons he had his reasons and I trust [TS]

  him [TS]

  generally I don't trust Gary but after i [TS]

  realized Gary was you know was [TS]

  predictable in his in his moods then I [TS]

  was like at you know I have more [TS]

  problems with the rooster then I do with [TS]

  Gary because Gary's yelling things at [TS]

  one thirty in the morning which is kind [TS]

  of the middle of my day whereas the [TS]

  route starts at dawn [TS]

  yeah she's but now I'm concerned I'm [TS]

  concerned that she's losing her house I [TS]

  think she has family upstate we don't [TS]

  say upstate here but that's that's the [TS]

  the best definition of it [TS]

  write-ups upstate is not a thing we say [TS]

  in Washington we don't say the five [TS]

  either [TS]

  oh that's definitely thing and we don't [TS]

  say the pot you don't say it in San [TS]

  Francisco either because the be [TS]

  described like yeah thats its creeping [TS]

  into the culture here but I five doesn't [TS]

  mean anything to you guys slow but [TS]

  people might say that 280 and it's [TS]

  considered Bay Area thinkin to to leave [TS]

  off the definite article that the answer [TS]

  is considered a very la thing to look at [TS]

  the definite article in front of a [TS]

  number for highway the 1005 [TS]

  matter with those big ham but now now [TS]

  I'm I've been deputized basically by the [TS]

  cougar lady not of my own accord but she [TS]

  gave me the number [TS]

  her number and she said if anything goes [TS]

  on over there we be sure to give me a [TS]

  call [TS]

  interesting okay i see ok the stories [TS]

  all coming together and I was like boom [TS]

  all right well if anything goes on over [TS]

  there [TS]

  you're definitely on the list of people [TS]

  i'm gonna call now [TS]

  yeah there was you know there was always [TS]

  a list of people i was going to call the [TS]

  fire department the Environmental [TS]

  Protection Agency anyway so she just [TS]

  appeared on the porch and answer the [TS]

  door and this is but this is going to [TS]

  shock and and appalled you i think but [TS]

  I'm in my underwear [TS]

  ok and i'm wearing a I'm wearing [TS]

  headphones and I'm and I have a [TS]

  microphone yeah my own John you should [TS]

  be comfortable [TS]

  that's right i have actually you know [TS]

  the microphone i use is called Abby [TS]

  caster so this is the one you have to [TS]

  put on your chest [TS]

  yeah I've got my be castor it's not [TS]

  currently on my chest but it's on my [TS]

  dining room table I've got my laptop so [TS]

  i pick up the laptop the be castor the [TS]

  headphones the underwear i go to the [TS]

  front door and I opened and I'm just [TS]

  standing there in all my glory didn't [TS]

  check that didn't come across the audio [TS]

  but it really doesn't really add [TS]

  something to the picture [TS]

  well and you know and you her eyes got [TS]

  wide and she said are you on the phone [TS]

  said you know you heard it [TS]

  you were right here with me anyway she [TS]

  said yeah cheek sorry deputize me I [TS]

  don't know if I made it clear but i want [TS]

  you if there's any activity over there [TS]

  and she kind of gave up like an i [TS]

  gesture to the effect of if they're [TS]

  moving out or if they're like stealing [TS]

  the copper plumbing or something as [TS]

  they're leaving OIC I say what you want [TS]

  to give me a call because I don't want [TS]

  it to be one of those situations where [TS]

  there's no wall bourgogne got it ok I [TS]

  see its own how you wanted this role [TS]

  John no no she didn't but but i think i [TS]

  think having had a conversation with her [TS]

  now she considers me an ally because and [TS]

  I said to them when they were on my [TS]

  porch because it's because her husband [TS]

  was fairly quiet and I said you guys do [TS]

  this a lot you buy houses at auction and [TS]

  around and they're like oh yeah it's [TS]

  kind of our it's our thing I want my [TS]

  husband's a contractor and icicic and so [TS]

  this was another this was another [TS]

  indicator that they were grown-ups in [TS]

  that what they do as a couple is not go [TS]

  golfing it isn't a you know they don't [TS]

  go to Thailand they don't they don't [TS]

  race cars there thing is let's go buy [TS]

  houses at auction fix them up and sell [TS]

  got it and I was like what a very [TS]

  interesting like husband-wife thing you [TS]

  know like they do this together [TS]

  it's almost a kind of entrepreneurship [TS]

  absolutely but it's also absolutely has [TS]

  to be a hobby they have to like to go to [TS]

  auctions yeah they have to know what [TS]

  their you know buying a house is no [TS]

  small thing they have to know what [TS]

  they're getting into [TS]

  I'm betting that she handles the [TS]

  financials I say either so let that [TS]

  happen sometimes with people who sell [TS]

  real estate together [TS]

  mm no I mean when you got a couple that [TS]

  does real estate that kind of break up [TS]

  the the works that they have a project [TS]

  together but they also have their own [TS]

  important roles right so she's doing all [TS]

  the financial stuff which is probably no [TS]

  small potato and then she's the one that [TS]

  knocks on the door and she's the one [TS]

  that says hi neighbor here's the deal [TS]

  here's our new plant we're going to be [TS]

  working on the house across the street [TS]

  and we're trying to do a nice job and [TS]

  get and he just standing there he's [TS]

  looking at his boots the whole time [TS]

  chef one and he's thinking to himself I [TS]

  wonder how I wonder how cheaply I can [TS]

  redo the bathroom with book learning [TS]

  college sweatshirts he had on what you [TS]

  would call contractor close [TS]

  ok which I think of as like a clean [TS]

  heart kind of thing [TS]

  well but he's the supervisor right let's [TS]

  shoot he's the owner/operator of a plant [TS]

  plaid shirt yeah he's though he's [TS]

  licensed and bonded he doesn't need two [TS]

  keys not wearing a tool belt anymore but [TS]

  when the work is getting done he's not [TS]

  above swinging a hammer [TS]

  you know because he's sweet small [TS]

  independent contractor but but he [TS]

  definitely he definitely is like on the [TS]

  up-and-up with the city in the county [TS]

  he's not he's not he's not doing it [TS]

  under the under the table he's a [TS]

  straight shooter got it cut and I'm i [TS]

  didn't see their car but one hundred [TS]

  percent i bet it is a dodge ram truck [TS]

  with and I think it's the 2500 if you [TS]

  see a dodge ram 1500 that could be just [TS]

  a regular person is that you look like [TS]

  an f-150 [TS]

  yeah so you're talking about okay i see [TS]

  interesting because f-150 is like that's [TS]

  a consumer pickup truck with all due [TS]

  respect [TS]

  yeah that's a half-time happen to have [TS]

  done okay okay and if you see somebody [TS]

  in a dodge 1 1500 you think oh they went [TS]

  to the day when truck shop at the condé [TS]

  truck yeah they chose the during the [TS]

  time just sayin like that's a definite [TS]

  go to costco kind of truck or put you in [TS]

  a canoe in the backcountry [TS]

  yeah but can you in the back or you're [TS]

  just somebody that wants a pickup truck [TS]

  because that's the that's the look [TS]

  you're going for [TS]

  or you figure yet you figure you're [TS]

  gonna have to haul your bicycles or [TS]

  maybe your it's a real truck then you're [TS]

  doing real work but you chose a ton [TS]

  pickup and that seems to me like [TS]

  features Chevy if you chose bored of you [TS]

  chosen dodge that's just aesthetic ok [TS]

  now at dodge 2500 diesel truck that was [TS]

  like extra tires [TS]

  no that's not one of those that's just [TS]

  the 2500 is like you're you are going to [TS]

  use this truck [TS]

  it's a working truck you're working [TS]

  person and you chosen the Dodge because [TS]

  it can it communicates to you [TS]

  less lip agility and more like I'm going [TS]

  to work here and this is the this is but [TS]

  this is a truck didn't look at that [TS]

  thing [TS]

  Oh work that's a Pilatus it's like a [TS]

  bulldog it sold out now if you see [TS]

  someone driving a dodge 3500 who it is [TS]

  almost ninety nine percent sure that [TS]

  that person is an asshole [TS]

  ok [TS]

  but up that ok [TS]

  what haha how did you how did you get to [TS]

  that I think I'll because you can just [TS]

  tell experience bears this out okay that [TS]

  that is the truck of choice for people [TS]

  who for people who like burn coal now [TS]

  this one does [TS]

  you can get this with the flared fenders [TS]

  right the ship the extra wheel and it's [TS]

  my understanding the extra wheel on [TS]

  there is because you're carrying things [TS]

  that are so heavy you would literally [TS]

  pop your tires because of the heaviness [TS]

  or towing if you're towing a big big big [TS]

  trailer more ground surface [TS]

  yeah you're gonna be horse trailer or [TS]

  something here you know you're gonna [TS]

  want the extra the Dooleys as they're [TS]

  called Julie's huh and almost almost [TS]

  universally those are now diesel-powered [TS]

  their big cummins diesel engines and [TS]

  they're there they're super macho and if [TS]

  you're pulling a horse trailer [TS]

  let's let me say this if you're driving [TS]

  at 3,500 dodge 3500 and you are pulling [TS]

  a horse trailer i will give you one [TS]

  opportunity to prove you're not an [TS]

  asshole [TS]

  ok but but that's the only dispensation [TS]

  i will offer everyone else is an asshole [TS]

  and if you ever see a 32-bit you ever [TS]

  see somebody burning coal which is to [TS]

  say that they have modified their diesel [TS]

  motor so that it creates intentionally [TS]

  creates big clouds of black smoke as a [TS]

  as a fuck you two environmentalist your [TS]

  your 1% driving a dodge 3500 and you [TS]

  don't see that you don't see the coal [TS]

  burning so much in the 1500 no no no why [TS]

  would what a 15-minute you just bought a [TS]

  truck you just bought a truck you're [TS]

  driving around in a truck dodge truck [TS]

  around we don't have two trucks like you [TS]

  can take care of that [TS]

  that's your truck engine it's your it's [TS]

  your car yeah when you're driving out in [TS]

  America i'm not talking about here on [TS]

  the coasts where people are you know [TS]

  living in their ivory towers and sipping [TS]

  wine out of [TS]

  little classes and lifting their pinkies [TS]

  and stuff when they drink coffee [TS]

  I'm talking about out in america in the [TS]

  united states of america places like the [TS]

  Dakotas or the Nebraska's you will find [TS]

  that every every every single person is [TS]

  driving a truck now there are no cars in [TS]

  those places they've eliminated all cars [TS]

  everyone is driving a truck and the [TS]

  trucks are just there in an arms race to [TS]

  see who can be the biggest asshole like [TS]

  and the truck is the way of [TS]

  communicating that the truck if that is [TS]

  the case then just having a truck is [TS]

  table stakes like you yeah we're not [TS]

  gonna get to really participate in the s [TS]

  operate unless you have one is time [TS]

  agreeing because i don't have the [TS]

  experience with it but I'm just trying [TS]

  to understand [TS]

  yeah if you're just driving a truck yeah [TS]

  your steps just normal you're just the [TS]

  normal and if you're driving a [TS]

  three-quarter ton truck [TS]

  it's like yeah i live in Nebraska i'm [TS]

  doing stuff I got able to move around [TS]

  who even if i'm a college professor i [TS]

  probably have hay bales to move around [TS]

  because because uh that's what my [TS]

  students it on at the University of [TS]

  Nebraska ok right and if you've ever [TS]

  been to University braska lecture hall [TS]

  it's just hay bales kind of stacked up [TS]

  in a like a grandstand that seems good [TS]

  use of the environment [TS]

  what's that was the mascot of the [TS]

  Nebraska team is not the Cornhuskers is [TS]

  it [TS]

  yeah is it the other husking corn total [TS]

  hay bales to to build corn bales for the [TS]

  university [TS]

  oh it's a whole biome yeah and since [TS]

  we're gonna learn about corn you sit on [TS]

  corn your hall corn you teach corn you [TS]

  use corn to the thicken saw score all [TS]

  the way down you put corn in your truck [TS]

  but not it not if you're driving a [TS]

  diesel mhm but you because it was the [TS]

  ethanol ethanol is a gasoline product [TS]

  made out of corn [TS]

  ok I think if it's made out of corn it's [TS]

  technically called court ball [TS]

  corn dogs and Simpson that's respect and [TS]

  corn appalled was that was that great [TS]

  city in Greece who and there was also a [TS]

  book of the bible i think you have [TS]

  played on a brilliant corners by the [TS]

  loneliest monk brother really corn rolls [TS]

  that the history of Nebraska and channel [TS]

  yeah but probably it's very nice [TS]

  probably taught at the university when [TS]

  they teach the history it's probably [TS]

  time to buy a corn corn corn is does the [TS]

  medium well so university of nebraska is [TS]

  the intellectual school of Nebraska [TS]

  Nebraska State College dog doesn't it's [TS]

  where they really that's the real Aggie [TS]

  school and that's where they teach you [TS]

  how to burn coal that's where they're [TS]

  really in their corn there there there [TS]

  in their corns and they all have corns [TS]

  on their feet uh-huh [TS]

  it's really really really corny like [TS]

  sympathy weight when somebody gets [TS]

  pregnant he just gets there so much corn [TS]

  that cause corns corn is what's [TS]

  happening a sympathy weight yeah it's [TS]

  like sympathy weight it's like shaving [TS]

  your head when your friend is going [TS]

  through chemo that's a nice thing to do [TS]

  not see in my head I feel like I [TS]

  associate Iowa with corn [TS]

  mm but you know I because I think a lot [TS]

  of what I I'm not to say what i learned [TS]

  i think a lot of what I retained about [TS]

  America came from maps on placemats [TS]

  where there was one item associated with [TS]

  every state i think corn was on iowa [TS]

  right and what was the brassica I was it [TS]

  was a Dodge truck know and now sort of [TS]

  Florida you get you get an orange may be [TS]

  right out [TS]

  continue get an apple apple do they stop [TS]

  by three [TS]

  okay yeah what the pine trees being [TS]

  maybe Oregon [TS]

  oh IC IC but you know if you need and [TS]

  that's a lot night let's be honest a [TS]

  little bit reductive to bring it down to [TS]

  a single item [TS]

  yeah i think there are more pine trees [TS]

  in Washington Oregon but you're right [TS]

  Oregon have gets the country as their [TS]

  emblem I think back then organs should [TS]

  be like a handmade wooden wouldn't [TS]

  wallet [TS]

  nowadays right nowadays a handmade [TS]

  wooden wallet or somebody in a [TS]

  Shakespearean costume standing on one [TS]

  toe [TS]

  the flute from Nebraska at the time I [TS]

  think what on that place math would have [TS]

  been a would have been like indicated by [TS]

  some jello with little fruit bits in it [TS]

  hmm i miss that i miss that but if you [TS]

  think about corn-fed beef was corn-fed [TS]

  beef coming from [TS]

  ok so that's more about beef and corn [TS]

  well but you can't have beef without the [TS]

  corn the corn it's gotta come from [TS]

  somewhere [TS]

  yep and I don't think it isn't like [TS]

  you're just taking your heard you say hi [TS]

  a slap on the button sentimiento [TS]

  cornfield [TS]

  no he's not know you guys does not a [TS]

  corn maze for steer you got a husk that [TS]

  corn you gotta shut that corner got a [TS]

  tote that barge and lift that bale and [TS]

  you gotta bail the girls in your 2500 a [TS]

  little drunk and land in jail and yeah [TS]

  okay well even before there were 2,500 [TS]

  people were doing this with horse-drawn [TS]

  I don't know the answer on miss colorado [TS]

  what were you doing corn-fed beef comes [TS]

  from so i've been corn-fed beef is a [TS]

  real Nebraska thing they're real proud [TS]

  of it and I think they're not shipping [TS]

  let's just stay they're not shipping [TS]

  that corn from Iowa you know what I mean [TS]

  that's locally grown locally sourced ok [TS]

  oh it's farm-to-table corn right and [TS]

  we're gonna let me guess it's farm to [TS]

  form farm-to-table to farm-to-table farm [TS]

  that goes right to the steer you know [TS]

  it's just the form goes the corn goes [TS]

  through the steer through you and [TS]

  back-to-the-land hakuna matata but so [TS]

  now what days if you go so back in the [TS]

  day when you would go into a restaurant [TS]

  you get a corn-fed beef and anna and a [TS]

  wedge salad [TS]

  mhm it drink 14 gin martinis and then [TS]

  you'd sign the contract [TS]

  those days are gone my friend and now [TS]

  nowadays if you're going into a [TS]

  restaurant that's called The Walrus and [TS]

  the spaghetti squash you're going to [TS]

  find that call that you don't want to be [TS]

  fed by close one of those one of those [TS]

  logos that has like an X made out of [TS]

  like a fork and knife and it's got four [TS]

  letters in it like that kind of note [TS]

  that logo is called but like the the [TS]

  Portland logo [TS]

  yeah SQ ed [TS]

  or uh yeah that's kew order this is the [TS]

  whale and the squid the spaghetti squash [TS]

  what's going on [TS]

  yeah the work wale and then square in [TS]

  the spaghetti sauce if their spaghetti [TS]

  sauce I'm sorry spaghetti squash not [TS]

  spaghetti sauce that's a different place [TS]

  yeah have you ever have you ever made us [TS]

  spaghetti squash know I've seen photos i [TS]

  think it might have seen him in person [TS]

  but I'm i feel like the the inside kind [TS]

  of freaked me out [TS]

  yeah I tried at 1.2 i try to 1.2 say [TS]

  like yes okay I'm gonna be a person that [TS]

  eats spaghetti squash okay and I tried [TS]

  it and sure it it's a food it's an [TS]

  edible food but it isn't spaghetti and [TS]

  so let's stop pretending [TS]

  yeah it's sort of like carob spaghetti [TS]

  squash is the carib of start just care [TS]

  of the lines like fake chocolate shake [TS]

  doclet they used to get in the nineteen [TS]

  seventies you go over to a hippie house [TS]

  and they say what you like a cookie [TS]

  well yes I always wanna cookie it's a [TS]

  chocolate chip cookie dough i'll take [TS]

  always take a chocolate chip cookie and [TS]

  then you need it's like that's not [TS]

  chocolate [TS]

  that's some kind of that's a that's [TS]

  a--that's a prank as a chocolate-chip [TS]

  style cookie product [TS]

  yeah it's a bitter that's a bitter root [TS]

  you put in there yeah but so nowadays [TS]

  you don't want corn in your beef and I [TS]

  think there was something called corn [TS]

  finishing where you let you let a cow [TS]

  just wander around eat grass and then [TS]

  right at the end you put in a stockyard [TS]

  you'd beat corn like get all the corner [TS]

  only handle one little amuse-bouche [TS]

  before the end [TS]

  mm and so it is so that's how it gets [TS]

  all the fat the marbled fatkins just [TS]

  eating sugar corn but nowadays you don't [TS]

  want that you want to count to live in a [TS]

  bucolic environment you wanted to eat [TS]

  alfalfa until it's very last moment yep [TS]

  you want the counter have a name you [TS]

  want there to be a little girl in [TS]

  pigtails that takes little flowers and a [TS]

  basket outside its got like an [TS]

  associate's degree the cow [TS]

  yeah yeah from the egg school no yes [TS]

  indeed yeah absolutely absolutely yeah [TS]

  his tracks 200 really really macho my [TS]

  goodness 3500 right it's just if you see [TS]

  a truck with a confederate flag in the [TS]

  back window ninety-nine percent of the [TS]

  time [TS]

  well now wait a minute i think of dodge [TS]

  ram 3500 as very much being in Nebraska [TS]

  South Dakota truck maybe as far as [TS]

  Missouri but I think when you get down [TS]

  into the South like I think of an [TS]

  Alabama truckers being a Chevrolet okay [TS]

  and like an eagle you know it's hard to [TS]

  be like the f250 right is the standard [TS]

  truck but i'm going to say that f 250 is [TS]

  somewhere do it you know they're they're [TS]

  doing farming in in ohio they're doing [TS]

  farming in Michigan law just add this is [TS]

  just a random data point but as he as [TS]

  you probably know like my neighborhood [TS]

  if there are people who are trades [TS]

  people there are a lot of those the sort [TS]

  of folks who live in my neighborhood and [TS]

  there are a lot of white pickup trucks [TS]

  and i'm going to say the preponderance [TS]

  is forwards and Toyotas now this is [TS]

  Captain Sisko right but it's a lot of [TS]

  what we're going to scroll forward 150 [TS]

  arm sort of paradigm sighs trucks and [TS]

  boy lot of them have the crap beat out [TS]

  of him these are these are people who do [TS]

  all kinds of different stuff its stated [TS]

  these are not costco trucks they are [TS]

  really really using these and I think in [TS]

  some cases it's like what they could [TS]

  afford and what they'll use rubber [TS]

  because that's kind of vibe in the [TS]

  neighborhood so I think that's true that [TS]

  is the the the for the reason the Fords [TS]

  are the best selling trucks are always [TS]

  were [TS]

  is that they're just used by everybody [TS]

  it's not a thing that you're driving [TS]

  around with a camouflage baseball hat [TS]

  and I've been a piece of school in your [TS]

  mouth it's a thing where you're going to [TS]

  need you need a truck to get the kind of [TS]

  stuff it doesn't like little step and [TS]

  it's not like you mean it doesn't that [TS]

  sort of tricked-out like I'm here to [TS]

  make a statement about being a truck [TS]

  it's got a shop back on the side and the [TS]

  the lock the door lock has been pinged [TS]

  out and it's been replaced with a [TS]

  padlock know she'll be the ignition is [TS]

  probably gone and you start with a [TS]

  screwdriver [TS]

  are you doing driving far that you [TS]

  started with a screwdriver no that's the [TS]

  thing [TS]

  um are you feeling good about your role [TS]

  with this this new of potential neighbor [TS]

  contractor of years ago [TS]

  do you feel like are you feeling we do i [TS]

  put this way will you know when it's [TS]

  time to give her a call [TS]

  well so what I'm guessing is that when [TS]

  they finally go because i'm i'm on good [TS]

  terms with her I don't know if I've ever [TS]

  mention her name i think i have [TS]

  intensified Octavia but you have you [TS]

  been [TS]

  it's something historically if memory [TS]

  serves like you have been friendly with [TS]

  her you have been kind of worried about [TS]

  her you sort of checked in on her and [TS]

  just generally wish for goodwill for her [TS]

  yea even more than friendly with their I [TS]

  feel like I'm her friend and she has [TS]

  only very occasionally called me on the [TS]

  phone and one time she broached sheep [TS]

  she tried to bridge [TS]

  she tried to build a bridge over my [TS]

  River Kwai who which was she came to me [TS]

  and asked me for a loan to build the [TS]

  fence this fence that I'm the Spence [TS]

  that have to stare at all day and she [TS]

  said you know I need to build this fence [TS]

  it's halfway built which it was [TS]

  and the guy the junk hauling guy once [TS]

  another fifteen hundred dollars to [TS]

  finish the fence and I need to get the [TS]

  fence finished because the neighborhood [TS]

  kids are coming in the window and [TS]

  they're stealing the woofers and [TS]

  tweeters on my speaker right and I said [TS]

  jamaica good fences make good neighbors [TS]

  this is not a good fence and one other [TS]

  thing that makes good neighbors is not [TS]

  asking neighbors for loans particularly [TS]

  to finish shit fences and she was like [TS]

  right and I said yep i know that you [TS]

  probably felt that you were in a [TS]

  situation where you needed to do that in [TS]

  order to finish this offense but I'm [TS]

  opposed to the fence and also I you know [TS]

  it would be a guy would be giving you [TS]

  the money to finish a thing that I think [TS]

  is idiotic right so but but other than [TS]

  that we have always been very tight and [TS]

  she's never really called me because she [TS]

  she's never called me to say like [TS]

  there's something suspicious she [TS]

  generally called me to say have you seen [TS]

  my cat [TS]

  and her cat lives on my front porch no [TS]

  kidding [TS]

  yeah which is another thing her cat [TS]

  lives on my front porch but her cat [TS]

  won't let me pet him and so what that [TS]

  means is every night at 2am my ride home [TS]

  with my keys jangling and some box in my [TS]

  arms I am newly startled by this cat [TS]

  leaping out of the dark shadows on my [TS]

  porch and we're running away from me and [TS]

  45 years I've said kitty k-k-kitty it's [TS]

  just me hi kitty and the cat gives me [TS]

  nothing [TS]

  yes but he's living on my porch that's [TS]

  where he wants to be my porch is really [TS]

  disappointing John yeah and when he's [TS]

  the one when i had the possum that SAT [TS]

  there licking his paws [TS]

  oh come on this just can't have [TS]

  culpability [TS]

  yeah like you're not doing shit around [TS]

  here it's sickening so she'll call me [TS]

  sometimes she's like I haven't seen my [TS]

  cat couple days and I I never say this [TS]

  to her but I feel the same way like hey [TS]

  lady if you're give your cat got taken [TS]

  up a tree by a couple of Records i'm not [TS]

  going to shed a tear for him [TS]

  ya gotta figure shot though but I do [TS]

  feel like when they move it's going to [TS]

  happen in the middle of the night [TS]

  yeah and I don't think anybody in there [TS]

  is going to take I don't think they're [TS]

  gonna be like I was that one time when I [TS]

  was living in the apartment with the rat [TS]

  where I took all the light bulbs [TS]

  hahaha oh that's just that's just bratty [TS]

  that's just being that's just churlish [TS]

  am I don't think they're going to do [TS]

  that because there's not that much [TS]

  market for secondhand light [TS]

  [Music] [TS]