Hello Internet

H.I. #27 Bumper Christmas Special


  Fail not work at all man. [TS]

  Let us start the show properly now we've dealt with more technical problems which is always the worst way to stop what [TS]

  seems to be coming in. [TS]

  Yes the trend though is super exciting for people listening to us to hear about our technical problems. [TS]

  Last time we mentioned patriotic as a way for people to support us we recorded quite possibly the worst advertisement [TS]

  ever recorded in podcast history. Yes that is that is entirely possible. [TS]

  We did it on the spot recording of an advertisement which sounded like a good idea in theory [TS]

  but maybe in practice turned out terribly. [TS]

  But in spite of our atrocious advertisement we have many people to thank for supporting us on the picture so I just [TS]

  wanted to say thank you to all of those people who have decided to chip in to help the show. [TS]

  And at this point our first list of peach on supporters should be at. [TS]

  Hello Internet dot com slash Petri on if you went for the higher tier [TS]

  and your name will be listed there as one of our official patrons So thank you very much like a hall of fame sort of [TS]

  you know it is like the most amazing Hall of Fame that there ever has been I think is the best way to describe Have you [TS]

  done it like it doesn't look like an on a board like has got like a woodpecker [TS]

  and it looks like the names of you can go to what we're recording this ahead of time so right now I have actually done [TS]

  nothing at all. Where it was a very have to pretend great right because we'll be listening to this in the future. [TS]

  Are we looking at the page now of gray and it looks fantastic. [TS]

  Yes that was that was super committee Brady So yes that will be up [TS]

  and again just want to thank the people who were supporting us [TS]

  but people be listening to us on Christmas morning possibly if they are incredibly dedicated fans because this is our [TS]

  Christmas show. [TS]

  Can you put podcasts up on Christmas morning like to the Apple elves work on Christmas Day to approve pod casts [TS]

  and things. [TS]

  Well I guess this is another one of these things that we are going to find out and it could be a Boxing Day edition. [TS]

  Yes exactly right. Fingers. Trust This is our Christmas show. Perhaps it isn't. [TS]

  Who knows anyone who listened to the last podcast. [TS]

  In fact even if I didn't listen to it I probably have a clue that I met later because that was the name of the podcast [TS]

  I went to I went to this charity thing at Bristol So David Prowse who played Darth Vader was there [TS]

  and I sat with him and oh lovely. Yes I did not tell the whole story. [TS]

  I held something back because I want to talk about it with you and I have since talked about it with you [TS]

  and I want to talk about it with a few other people and I'm now in a position to tell the whole story. Please do. [TS]

  Because David Prowse was there in support of the zoo's charitable endeavors [TS]

  and his contribution was he was donating an opportunity to watch the original Star Wars movie with him [TS]

  and twenty of your friends had a sort of V.I.P. Screening held at the zoo and then have a Q. [TS]

  and A with him afterwards and just hang out. So what style was with The Fighter and then hang out with him. [TS]

  Pretty cool process it was a pretty cool is a pretty cool for us now. Argo I was a bit excited by the whole night. [TS]

  And I was sitting with her and we were all dressed up in tuxes and I've had a few wines and everything was good [TS]

  and I had sort of add a bit and then when the auction came I suddenly had a rush of blood [TS]

  and I thought this is I'm going to go for this is your moment this is my moment I've always wanted to be like that cool [TS]

  guy that just subtly puts his hand up for the auction [TS]

  and let you know just does the know odd look from the auctioneer [TS]

  and it's like you know I feel like you feel like you're pretty important right. [TS]

  So that's what I did and I won the auction. Oh yeah. I won the auction so. [TS]

  So I've got this which is kind of funny in a way because our same style was a million times [TS]

  and I spent all night with David press say and I asked him anything I wanted. [TS]

  Anyway I don't think I don't think that auction was aimed. People who've never seen Star Wars. [TS]

  No I think that option was aimed at people who've seen it multiple times. [TS]

  But because I've sat next to David present his wife I kind of you know the novelty of getting to spend a lot of time [TS]

  with him maybe should never be able to me so much [TS]

  but I did enjoy his company so much that that actually enhanced the prop the prize in my eyes [TS]

  but I did I did I did on with an agenda. If I won and now that I have won it was time to deliver on that. [TS]

  And I've discussed it with you [TS]

  and I've discussed it with a few other important people including David press him self so I'm in a position to [TS]

  partially reveal the plan and that plan is we going to make available a selection of seats at the screening [TS]

  and you were going to come along. [TS]

  You know being a Star Wars fan and I'm going to be there and David presently [TS]

  and so we're going to say it's a chance for hello internet listeners who want to come and watch Star Wars with you [TS]

  and I and with Darth Vader himself come and hang out with us when we make these tickets or positions [TS]

  or seats available. However we do that. I don't know I don't know how we're going to do that. [TS]

  Yes yes we have not we have not figured out a lot of details yet we don't know yet. [TS]

  But whatever whatever we do however we raise any money from this. [TS]

  This isn't to go towards the hello internet private jet this is all the money from this is for South African penguins. [TS]

  I've spoken to the people of Bristol and they will also organize for us all to have a tour of the and look around [TS]

  and talk about some of the key animals especially the penguins. [TS]

  This whole charity thing is raising money for South African penguins. [TS]

  There's problems with South African penguins I think basically I don't know why this happens [TS]

  but it seems like the parents keep leaving their chicks to go foraging for food and when they don't come back. [TS]

  And there's always problems with these penguin chicks in the past two days got this big program where they sort of [TS]

  saving the chicks and saving the penguin colonies the trying to raise money for that. [TS]

  So we're going to raise more money for that. [TS]

  Yes I think we want to specify that the money is not going to us because we also decide it is probably the fairest [TS]

  thing to do is [TS]

  when we have decided the details we are going to first give that information to the patriotic supporters of the show. [TS]

  Yes we're not now we're not saying that it's going to be limited to patron supporters that is not the way it's going to [TS]

  work. We're just going to give them a head start on getting these tickets. [TS]

  However we decide that that's that's going to happen. [TS]

  Yeah I mean I guess I figure they're probably the biggest superfans anyway so there are people who might think that [TS]

  coming all the way to Bristol to watch Star Wars with us is a worthwhile endeavor. [TS]

  Yeah well I don't I was figuring maybe we put some of them on there [TS]

  and then some of them will talk about on the podcast or the Twitter or something. [TS]

  Yeah it's not that's not the only way to find out but it's a very good way to find out. Yes whatever's going to happen. [TS]

  Your best chance of getting a ticket and right away it's going to be being on the on the patron [TS]

  but that does not mean that that will be the only way to do it [TS]

  but that's why I want to emphasize that the ticket money the ticket the ticket sale themselves will be going to [TS]

  penguins. And who doesn't like penguins. [TS]

  Monsters Brady That's who doesn't like penguins I like penguins on the Penguins. [TS]

  I'm actually in some ways just hanging out with like a bunch of hello internet people in news is pretty cool anyway. [TS]

  But then getting to go [TS]

  and then watch Star Wars with Darth Vader afterwards that's been that's pretty clear I think that's really the selling [TS]

  point. We will happen to be there but Darth Vader will be there. [TS]

  Yeah so I'm not sure if you bring along a Darth Vader picture or something. [TS]

  David will sign it for you because he signs he's pretty used to Santa Fe to pictures [TS]

  and you can bring along your i Phone or your Kindle [TS]

  and I'm sure Gray will sign up for a death that we very have an interest in those I don't know what you bring in bring [TS]

  along a piece of plane wreckage and also that for you if you want to verify that I was someone who wrote me this [TS]

  and that of the i'd have police I have police on anything or tell us on the tape. [TS]

  No you did not tell me so I didn't see all of them in India. [TS]

  The chemistry hands brought along these test tubes for us to sign. [TS]

  That sounds difficult to sign but it was it was difficult isn't it. Knows just yet to shoot the hardest really people. [TS]

  I Phone Now if you want to come in so they come and see Star Wars and zoo animals with hello internet and beta [TS]

  or do you think anyone will actually listen on Christmas Day I don't know possibly people will listen on Christmas Day [TS]

  I bet some people listen on Christmas day. Would you listen to a podcast on Christmas day. [TS]

  Well it's I think I always find Christmas I was on Christmas Day kind of strange [TS]

  and partly because in in my family I think I sort of alluded to before Christmas Eve was usually actually the bigger [TS]

  day because of the Dutch connection in my family we usually opened the presents on Christmas Eve so we didn't open the [TS]

  presents on Christmas Day and that was always the big the big celebration was was that day. [TS]

  And then so for me Christmas morning was often a much smaller event. [TS]

  And I always remember having the strange feeling of like almost like twelve noon on Christmas day somehow Christmas is [TS]

  just over. [TS]

  It just doesn't feel like it's Christmas anymore and I still have that as an adult somehow that that Christmas. [TS]

  And remarkably soon on Christmas Day That feeling of oh it's Christmas time [TS]

  and so I think there would be if there are people like me there will be afternoon Christmas Day podcast listeners. [TS]

  So you've done the whole morning should bang [TS]

  and maybe you're just you know you're relaxing somewhere possibly away from your family for a few moments of respite. [TS]

  And so they might be listening to the show. [TS]

  Hello if you're listening to the soothing tones of seed you can grow in the Brady to get stiffed. [TS]

  Yes Possibly possibly. [TS]

  It's funny how like what you think Christmas is like unlike your childhood Christmas sort of gets locked in [TS]

  and of the other ways that people do Christmas like just you never really become comfortable with other people's ways [TS]

  but I'm the same as you actually feel for various family reasons Christmas Eve was always more exciting because that's [TS]

  when we saw you know the auntie and uncle who were the ones who we did fun presence within the fun cousins and stuff. [TS]

  Then Christmas Day We did other things and so Christmas Eve was just it was more exciting for me. [TS]

  But that aside since moving to the U.K. [TS]

  From Australia from the Southern Hemisphere like I cannot get used to the fact for example that people just watch so. [TS]

  much T.V. On Christmas Day in the U.K. Oh yeah like that's like the thing to do. [TS]

  There's all these special shows on and people will ate and then watch the show [TS]

  and then that show like Christmas day revolves around television in the U.K. [TS]

  And you know there are special movies that they released on the day like you know the latest Harry Potter film will [TS]

  premiere on Christmas Day and things like that and in Australia where it's sunny and you just go outside [TS]

  and go to the beach and play cricket. [TS]

  I think if I turned the television on in Australia on Christmas Day Well I would've got in trouble as a kid. [TS]

  But also people would just think you know like some kind of weirdo. [TS]

  I'm remembering now that when when I was younger my family for two out of the three Lord of the Rings movies we went [TS]

  and saw them on Christmas Day at the cinema. [TS]

  Yeah they came out on I think if I don't know if it was on Christmas Day [TS]

  or just slightly before Christmas Day But so yes there are a couple of watching Lord of the Rings on Christmas Day is [TS]

  in my family the other thing that's crazy to me that it seems so many people in the U.K. [TS]

  Is seeing their friends on Christmas Day like go to the pub or go out with their friends in the evening. [TS]

  But to me that Christmas day was like Christmas Day I was the one day of the year practically that I was banned from [TS]

  saying my friend. [TS]

  My my for my next door neighbors who I want to play cricket with you know every day of my life [TS]

  or you know go swimming with all my might so my school friends was like this was the one day of the year we were all [TS]

  kind of told no you're not allowed to play cricket with Stephen and Adam today right. [TS]

  They're going to see their family. [TS]

  You're going to see your family this is a family day right this is the one day of the year you can give your friends a [TS]

  rest and put your family first. But here in the U.K. [TS]

  Almost everyone I know like they do the family stuff during the day [TS]

  and then it's off to the pub with friends that you have just made it funny living in living in London. [TS]

  I've known many more immigrants I think than English people over my time so I don't necessarily have a good sense of [TS]

  what it is that English people do on their their Christmas day. [TS]

  OK now I'm a bit more I'm a bit more ingratiated into England than I So you are sure you are saying you've gone native [TS]

  is what you've done. [TS]

  I have gone a bit native look what we're talking about Christmas let me change the order of things a bit because things [TS]

  are getting Christmas Day And you know you promised to send me a picture of your Christmas tree. [TS]

  You have not done this. Yeah I'm sorry I'm sorry I have no one. [TS]

  Are you ashamed now I just honestly I just it hasn't crossed my mind I can message how life in the other room right now. [TS]

  If you want to picture the Christmas tree yeah I want to I want to nail during the show. [TS]

  You want right now I want to chew on it during the show. Let me message to Mrs Skinner on tour I want to see this tray. [TS]

  Well I was going to I was going to give you a hard time about that unless I tell you we we we [TS]

  when shows outrĂ© we like something we've done a couple times now going and cutting it down ourselves like choosing [TS]

  and then like executing in the forest. [TS]

  Have you have you ever done when I was growing up we always had a plastic tree we never had a real tree. [TS]

  Yeah and with my wife now she is the one who introduced the notion of real trees [TS]

  and one last time something he would never occur to me to do yet and we have not done the go into the forest [TS]

  and pick out a tree just like they do in the movies thing. [TS]

  It mainly because we're living in central London and so it is a little bit difficult to get out into the forest [TS]

  and so we always end up just going to a couple places that are nearby [TS]

  and picking up some pre-selected trees prio executed three executed trees yes that is that is what we do well next year [TS]

  you come out with us and you can come and you can come and help us choose a trade because it's so much fun. [TS]

  Sounds like a long day that sounds like a long day. It's my work it's really easy and really fun. [TS]

  It's really good but it's like a farm you know it's really fun [TS]

  and the one we went to the sea was really good because they put ribbons on the ones you're allowed to cut down [TS]

  and because you know some of them they're growing for future years [TS]

  and at this particular place every single one of them has like a name unlike they've given fun names [TS]

  and the name colors your choice in some ways as well as what the train looks like wait wait wait wait wait wait wait. [TS]

  A lot a lot. They've given the trees individual names. [TS]

  Yes Like this tree is called Tom Yes Well the one we ended up with was called Spencer. [TS]

  So we chose Spencer but there are all sorts of code names [TS]

  and some of the last thing someone has to name all the trees how I'm wondering a forest full of trees [TS]

  and a lot of names [TS]

  or it's not like it's not like a return of the Jed I taught for a set to stretches forever it's a bit more [TS]

  but even so I often go to Ikea [TS]

  and I marvel at all the names in Ikea I think it is exhausting coming up with names for all of these products. [TS]

  I'm a distant visioning like how many items are there in Ikea versus how many trees in this forest that you're going to. [TS]

  Yeah it would always say he would have had to come up with a few hundred names at least. [TS]

  Yeah I often think that about people that run dog sanctuary says well we're not going to give all the dogs names. [TS]

  I find they tend to recycle their names a lot. [TS]

  Yeah they must recycle the names they must recycle I've got the picture of the Christmas tree. [TS]

  So what do you think you're OK with this I have to say a lot. [TS]

  Yeah you've done well it's it's it's quite close to a style as well so I can't even begin to tell you how to set it. [TS]

  But I am without a life on this Christmas tree. [TS]

  Now I like a lot so it's got a nice balance [TS]

  but also a touch of randomness I think you've done well you do need it you do need a touch of randomness if it's too [TS]

  even it looks all wrong. [TS]

  Yeah but for some reason we have I don't know what this is I don't know what this is [TS]

  but we bought some Christmas tree lights [TS]

  and I'm going to get some Christmas tree lights that are in a string so I can arrange it. [TS]

  Have you gotten Christmas tree like they come in in a loop. [TS]

  Yes You know we have got one that's a string and one that's a loop. [TS]

  Yeah so some of our strands are these loops [TS]

  and I don't under I don't understand the reasoning for this I don't understand why this is the case [TS]

  and so I think I think we have two strands that are loops [TS]

  and two strands that are single strands like you know single strand in the way sanity deems it should be. [TS]

  Yeah and as a result of this I have had a heck of a time trying to balance the lights to my satisfaction [TS]

  and I find myself sitting on the couch looking at the tree [TS]

  and then just getting irritated because it doesn't look right so I go over and try to adjust it. [TS]

  But because of this the loop loop strand disparity I am not able to achieve satisfaction so I am unhappy with the [TS]

  distribution I mean in this light you send me it looks like the lots at the top of the tree are actually switched on I [TS]

  can't say them for I think this is because the lighting in the room. [TS]

  I think I can't completely judge on how well you've done the lots but from what I can say I find it quite pleasing. [TS]

  Yeah I did notice this is the top of the picture cut off or is there no star on the tray nothing on top. [TS]

  We have had some star difficulties this year. [TS]

  Do you want to share with the group that don't need to share every tiny detail of my fuzziness about everything is just [TS]

  not necessary. [TS]

  We can just leave it that that star acquisition was not satisfactory This year however you sent me a picture of your [TS]

  Christmas tree yet I again I'm going to say this and you can take it the wrong way [TS]

  but I take it the way I mean it pretty. Your decorations your stay. [TS]

  Our is never something that I would pick for myself but I think it looks absolutely great on your tree. [TS]

  Would you care to describe the star on your tree and your tree decorations. [TS]

  Well I find it weird that you call a star because clearly it's like an angel. [TS]

  Yeah the thing at the top of the tree no matter what it is is a star saying no no no no no this is your getting into my [TS]

  Christmas tree baggage here. [TS]

  Whatever it is at the top of the tree it's a star nine nine and I saw I saw a Christmas tree decoration. [TS]

  I think on Reddit presumably on Reddit which was somebody had a King Kong at the top of his Christmas tree that had an [TS]

  airplane in one hand and I forget the actor's name in the other hand. [TS]

  So even if there is a King Kong at the top of your tree it is still a star I refer to that as a star. [TS]

  Now am I wrong about this. Well I have I have childhood issues here. [TS]

  My my mom was the chief decorator of a Christmas tree and I was very she's a very particular woman [TS]

  and like sings how she likes them. So we were we were given only a minimal role in A Christmas tree decorating. [TS]

  We were allowed to put a few decorations on the strategic places and. [TS]

  If that wood around the back maybe we got away with it but otherwise they might end up getting moved [TS]

  and my mom had a real preference for a stop stop at the top of the tree you know. [TS]

  Appointee stuck in a Star of death [TS]

  and sorry she completely so I managed to just so scarred by this I can't even tell the story she had a very strong [TS]

  preference for an angel as the star. OK she liked putting an angel up there. [TS]

  OK I always wanted a star as a starter because I thought that's the more cliched one [TS]

  and that's what's on Christmas cards and that's the cliche right. [TS]

  And I guess when you're young you just want to fit in and you want everything to be the same as everything else [TS]

  and you want your Christmas tree to be the same as everything else and so I was a was and why can't we have style. [TS]

  Top of the tree one. [TS]

  We always have to have an angel because I thought you know an angel was a big square [TS]

  and you know I don't know I just didn't like a lot of the stuff. So anyway that my mom was one of the angel of light. [TS]

  Later on I think maybe she relented one or two years but generally not. [TS]

  So now that I am grown up [TS]

  and I have my own Christmas tree my my wife's away better decorated the manger again she takes the lead role [TS]

  and I'm pretty much on the bench and I get to put the decoration on and maybe get sidelined if I'm not doing well [TS]

  but the one thing I put my foot down on was I'm a grown up. [TS]

  I'm having a stylist out the top of my trade none of this stuff that was like That was May You know I've got my own [TS]

  house now I can have it on top of the trade so every year so far we have had a traditional style. [TS]

  This year my wife said Actually I prefer to enjoy and I deny I was Paul I'd probably done something wrong [TS]

  or I was in the doghouse so I wasn't in a position to anyone sorry to say she said we have an angel whether you want to [TS]

  know when I have been a star. [TS]

  So I'm yet again stuck with an angel on top of the tray when what I really really want is a stop. [TS]

  So when you saw that Angel is top of the tray [TS]

  and said Oh I like you stop your cut me date because I want to step up I haven't go [TS]

  and I'm very sorry very sorry that I'm sorry about that story. [TS]

  I you know I and I understand I understand you know that when that when you're grown up you want things your own way [TS]

  and sometimes you don't get it. And it's sad. Let's talk about Star Wars. Now that's not to say something off the bat. [TS]

  OK A lot of people seem to think that I forced you into doing something you didn't want to do by watching that trailer [TS]

  would you DID YOU DON'T YOU HAVE NEVER in your life done anything you don't want to do as far as I can tell [TS]

  and you sure as heck I've never done anything. I've asked you to do that you didn't want to do. [TS]

  So any suggestion or a warning that you want. [TS]

  You want to watch it you just like me when I come to you to make me buy tech technology products. [TS]

  You just what you wanted me to push you into it. I disagree with your assessment here. [TS]

  First of all it is correct that in our relationship you do sometimes as I refer to it ask me to bully you into [TS]

  particular situations I think that that is that is fair to say. [TS]

  But with the Star Wars trailer I can honestly say that did we not have a pod cast. [TS]

  There is no way you could have ever talked me into watching that trailer you know you didn't want to. [TS]

  I did it for the people Brady but I did it for not for you. [TS]

  I did it for our amazing audience when other people are upset. Now the people are upset. [TS]

  Why are people I haven't seen anybody if that were you talking about. [TS]

  I've seen lots of people saying gray shouldn't of done it [TS]

  and Brady shouldn't of made him do I feel like I feel bad now [TS]

  but I don't believe I just you know I just think you want to watch. [TS]

  You don't do things you don't want to do if it wasn't for the podcast. [TS]

  I never would have watched it but I watched it and how many times have you watched this [TS]

  and I watched it a bunch that was quite a bunch [TS]

  and gone through it a little bit slower like you know what's this of those Pod races in the back and [TS]

  and the other thing which is of course the joy is that I can then listen to other people talk about the Star Wars [TS]

  trailer so there was a there was a good episode of the incomparable which is a podcast I think you [TS]

  and I both listen to and I don't know how However you have it is like the trailer is a minute and a half [TS]

  and they talked about the trailer for an hour and a half or so I forget what the exact numbers are [TS]

  but something like that I love. [TS]

  You're like you're like a you like an alcoholic falling off the wagon let you watch that one in your life now is going [TS]

  to keep. [TS]

  Yeah yeah there was it was a time that was incomparable thing [TS]

  and then of course one of the favorites that we've mentioned a bunch of times. [TS]

  The red letter media guys did uplink it review the Star Wars trailers I had to watch that [TS]

  and I'm not saying that so that it did. The thing that I did not want to. [TS]

  Did open up to me a whole world of media that I could not have consumed otherwise so that what I'm not going to lie [TS]

  that was enjoyable but the question of what would I have done it on my own would you have been able to talk me into it. [TS]

  If the circumstance were different now you would not have been able to talk me into that I want to know what you think [TS]

  about something. [TS]

  So a lot of people sent us a an image [TS]

  or a little video which was the final shot of the Millennium Falcon stabilized yet oh I don't know people never seen [TS]

  stabilized footage. [TS]

  The most hilarious stuff I can possibly point to you is there is an entire sub Reddit dedicated to Star Trek stabilized [TS]

  and so what. [TS]

  Just to describe for people who might not be aware [TS]

  when you've seen any episode of Star Trek you know there's always oh the Shield had been hit Captain where you know [TS]

  we're down to forty percent and the camera always shakes and everybody flies about the room. [TS]

  I think these kinds of shots you can feed that stuff into a computer. [TS]

  Which will then figure out how the camera moved to basically undo that so you can look at the scene as though through a [TS]

  camera that had just remained stable and some of the Star Trek stabilized stuff is just hilarious. [TS]

  You cannot imagine how terrible the actors look when they are trying to fling themselves away from control panels [TS]

  or fall on the floor because obviously the room that they're in isn't moving at all [TS]

  and so that's that is the stabilized stuff so you take out the camera movement [TS]

  and it is Star Trek stabilizes it is hilarious and and very enjoyable. So somebody did that for the Millennium Falcon. [TS]

  And what it revealed was that the Millennium Falcon did not perform the maneuvers that we sort of thought it did [TS]

  when we were talking last time. [TS]

  It just basically does a dive and pulls up so the maneuver is much more simple than it looks when you watch the film. [TS]

  Yeah we were kind of thinking of it that the Millennium Falcon was spinning around and narrowly avoiding stuff [TS]

  and I think you called it was like a hornet. Yeah we thought it was too. [TS]

  Nimble and agile and a lot of people said no it was not a job it was just the camera that made it look at jobs. [TS]

  Yes So people were sending us this stabilized thing in response. So what are your thoughts on this. [TS]

  Well first of all my thoughts on that. [TS]

  Even [TS]

  when stabilized is still skimming pretty close to the sand for a big clunky I still think it's an fast agile maneuver [TS]

  that it shouldn't be doing that close to the ground and I know [TS]

  and I said in the last part costs that I know it went through the asteroid belt [TS]

  and everyone has said it led you know it led the attack on the Death Star [TS]

  and things like that I am aware of that looking like you don't know that it's not like I don't know that [TS]

  but I still want to think of a bit of an old clunker and you think of all your best memories of the Millennium Falcon. [TS]

  Most of them involve being broken on the ground or things going wrong or for worse. [TS]

  Rob Rob Rob That is my favorite memory of the Millennium Falcon. So let's say let's say that first. [TS]

  Secondly if it takes a whole bunch of geeks on the Internet to apply this stabilization to show that it's not doing [TS]

  something amazing that's not an indictment on you and me. [TS]

  That's an indictment on the filmmaker because the filmmakers job is to convey an impression [TS]

  and the impression was that that ship was doing something awesome [TS]

  and if you can unpick it to show that it wasn't well so what we're not going to be sitting there watching the film [TS]

  when it comes out with stabilisation goggles on so that we can know what's really going on. [TS]

  Yes we can only we can only eat what was served with him [TS]

  and I So I think this whole look you know it was the camera that doesn't cut it. Yeah I'm with you one hundred percent. [TS]

  And I kept thinking of this is this is cheating. [TS]

  That's what this is and there's a phrase it comes from Futurama and so one is you are technically correct. [TS]

  The best kind of correct. And so to me this is Jade. [TS]

  It's getting to be technically correct about the moves that the Millennium Falcon can do while visually conveying an [TS]

  entirely different feeling. [TS]

  I give the stabilization thing a kind of thumbs down in that if people have not seen it the special George Lucas [TS]

  edition of the trailer is hilarious is it is it is so good. What I love about it. [TS]

  You can tell it is made by someone who the Special Editions really got under their skin [TS]

  and we were talking about a little bit on insta messenger [TS]

  but there is a part that I wanted to highlight to you which was the rocks over the droid that block your field of view [TS]

  and those are not just any old rocks. Do you know where those are from in the Special Editions. [TS]

  Now I can't think I actually can't think of any watch that special edition. [TS]

  Try that one so I'll probably watch that special edition trailer half as many times I've watched it actually I think it [TS]

  is just hilarious. The final shot with the Millennium Falcon and a million typewriters gets me every time. [TS]

  If so in the very first Star Wars movies when Luke Skywalker gets knocked out by the same people. R.T.D. [TS]

  Two goes and hides in some rocks in the wall [TS]

  and in this special edition version for just completely not understandable reasons. [TS]

  When they penned to R two D two they added in a whole bunch of rocks on the screen so that he's really hidden behind [TS]

  these rocks that weren't there in the original movie [TS]

  and this is a perfect example of messing with something for no reason. Who needed those rocks there. [TS]

  Nobody And when you place them there you also introduce a problem of how how the heck did R.T.D. [TS]

  To get behind all of these. [TS]

  There's no way for him to enter [TS]

  and it's just a just a great example of just messing with things for absolutely no to no benefit at all just to messing [TS]

  with stuff so whoever put those rocks in front of the Droid. [TS]

  That was a brilliant brilliant move and I feel like really stick the knife in directly to George Lucas. So come on. [TS]

  Going to hurry up with this podcast might you know you tell me about this plan get review I want to go. [TS]

  Should've told me about I'm sorry I'm sorry it's long to we can't stop and just you know now [TS]

  and I watch only where we get stuck on the follow up so we gotta keep cracking on. [TS]

  Well I just wanted to point something out a video a number fall video of mine made quite a while ago that we've [TS]

  mentioned on the podcast before because you've said it was kind of an addition for the podcast [TS]

  and the notes to me it was it was your audition you did not know if it wasn't the first time [TS]

  or you to Peter one of my videos you told me a few times before [TS]

  but this was a this was a longer one I helped I helped you out under very different circumstances. [TS]

  Yeah so anyway the one we're talking about just passed last week passed a million views so I thought it was a good [TS]

  chance to bring it up just to get under your skin again because yes the video is titled numbers confuse Americans. [TS]

  Yeah and you hate that typo along with many other people to be fair. [TS]

  Listen to think OK that people if people want to video. [TS]

  The whole video is it's about two American ex-pats one of which is myself [TS]

  and we are talking about differences grays not in the video by the way before you all get excited it's an animated [TS]

  Grace I don't think you going to go there [TS]

  and see his face who knows what who did you have do the animations that I was picking up. [TS]

  Yes that's right of course of course. [TS]

  Yep you did a good job in those animation so you have to like the vest yet so the video is too American ex-pats [TS]

  and we're talking about things in Britain with the number system that confuses us [TS]

  and they're just some common thing that that if you if you ever live abroad you run into this kind of stuff like the [TS]

  phone numbers don't have the same rhythm that you're expecting from your home country this kind of stuff. [TS]

  But you titled the video numbers confuse American which is pretty much what you said about five seconds ago except with [TS]

  a whole lot of Qual of us attached. OK but the correct title of this video should be British numbers confuse Americans. [TS]

  Not numbers in the abstract. [TS]

  I don't implies that all Americans are baffled by the notion of numbering thing that Amber [TS]

  or how do we we can group these things together [TS]

  and can we assign them a number I don't know it's so confusing right that that's what your title then why would you [TS]

  have would you have allowed if I'd called it numbers that confuse Americans. Godhead is better but just barely. [TS]

  Listen the thing that really irritates me about this is that I should go back [TS]

  and find our our methods like you agreed at some points to change the title and then you just never did. [TS]

  That is true but it was I was going to I was going to change the title. [TS]

  If there is a reason I haven't you've gone back on your word as far as I'm concerned that's the only thing that yes I [TS]

  accept that there is a reason I haven't changed it [TS]

  and there is so many people have commented on that if I now changed it would it would make all the all the [TS]

  conversational comments redundant you were just looking for an excuse not to change it not knowing what to say I mean I [TS]

  could change it right now it would mean nothing to me. OK if it means it means a lot on the thing to you change it. [TS]

  Would it mean a lot to you I would really like you to change the title. [TS]

  Really I would I think that that that title is is inaccurate. All right. [TS]

  Inaccurate misleading a lot mildly slanderous towards an entire nation of people. [TS]

  Artistic I just think it's like you know headlines to sometimes leave out details [TS]

  and I know I know we're verging on there's a difference tween click [TS]

  and tempting headlines I want to know is there a difference maybe there's not [TS]

  but I just think you can put too many boring words in a title and it just becomes there [TS]

  and you just got to pick a few words. Numbers confusion Americans and go What's this about and that is what it's about. [TS]

  It is about times when numbers confuse American I think it's times that confused [TS]

  when they're you know talking to non American people but it's. [TS]

  A bit like you know if if if I had a video of American people tripping over like falling over you know steps [TS]

  and things [TS]

  and banging their heads I would call that Americans trip over I wouldn't you know that doesn't mean every American is [TS]

  tripping over every minute of the day everywhere they go. [TS]

  That just means that in this video I'm showing you cases when Americans have tripped over. [TS]

  Just like in this particular video I'm showing you cases where numbers confuse Americans. [TS]

  Now to me this title is over the line all the way all of the relevant information is missing. [TS]

  Your tripping analogy does not make and any any sense [TS]

  and in this case I was trying to put up my internet is being particularly slow for some reason. [TS]

  I'm trying to think about what my most why most misleading headline might be and that might be. [TS]

  This video will hurt headlines. Yeah definitely. [TS]

  But I would argue that that headline is necessary for what that video is trying to accomplish. [TS]

  I will let people watch it if they have not seen it. [TS]

  I'll put a link in the show notes [TS]

  and you decide people on the Read it if you think that that title is over the line well I don't think it is. [TS]

  Unlike Gray's title which I would say the writers will obviously agree is way over the line. [TS]

  Well that's because like many of them are Americans but. [TS]

  If I think the part of the part of the fun of the video is kind of the you know the parochial with the divisiveness [TS]

  between the two sides of the Atlantic so why not have a headline that plays to that [TS]

  and you know stare the hornet's nest because it's a bit like I mean you're very scathing you know in a nice way about [TS]

  certain aspects of the way the British use numbers like the numbering system on strings and things [TS]

  and that's just kind of the game of that video it's kind of a friendly banter dare I use the word banter [TS]

  and I some people really hate that [TS]

  but if you say so it sounds like I have to change it now I mean I fall in the fall [TS]

  but how how much you value your word I guess as well. They're not going to change it. How much you value your word. [TS]

  This episode of hello internet has been brought to you once again by the shaving geniuses at Harry's hair is provide [TS]

  the whole shaving experience online. [TS]

  Well I mean you can actually shave online of course [TS]

  but you can buy everything you need to do it from the Harry's website raises replacement blades creams gels [TS]

  moisturizers. Go and check it all out and all of it comes at a really great price. [TS]

  I've been using Harry's stuff myself and I've got nothing but good things to say about them. [TS]

  Now whose hair is all about trying to take on those big shaving companies which charge what a voice same like [TS]

  extortionate prices for razor blades. [TS]

  How he's got great stuff [TS]

  but at a fraction of the price in fact if it isn't the heavy stuff is better than those other guys because I don't know [TS]

  I just like the design of the way this stuff looks. [TS]

  It's a sort of seems a bit more mature and classy and when its face I need all the help I can get [TS]

  when it comes to big mature and classy. [TS]

  Go to Harry's dot com the Web site for all the information prices and place orders and when you check out [TS]

  and to the offer code H Y That's short for hello internet and you'll get a five dollar discount on your first purchase. [TS]

  You save money [TS]

  and no know your hello internet listeners that's Harry Stockholm code H.-I normally what you do if you haven't already [TS]

  got a razor from Harry says buy like a start a set and that comes with your first handle as well [TS]

  and you can choose between this one called the Truman and the Winston [TS]

  and I like the Winston because it's like this silver alum minium handles really weighty and nice really nice design. [TS]

  So there you go there's my recommendation. [TS]

  The Winston I'm not going to make a recommendation between jail [TS]

  and shaving foam that's that seems like a personal decision to me and then [TS]

  when you first place run out I think you get a couple to start with obviously you know two or three I think. [TS]

  But when it comes time to replace them you can buy replacement blades really cheaply buy them online [TS]

  and they're really well made. Too many really good product really good service. Brilliant stuff. [TS]

  Harry's give him a try. And thank you so much to them for making our podcast possible. We appreciate it. [TS]

  I think there's only so much time we can spend talking about i Phones and we have done it quite a bit [TS]

  but I thought I would let people and you know that I have a new i Phone I think this is very exciting news. [TS]

  So what iphone did you get. I got the IP I cannot tell you how much I agonized over this. [TS]

  Well I know because I was on the receiving end of a large number of text messages about this [TS]

  when you were in the store. Yeah but I didn't know I didn't know what you ended up going with. [TS]

  You were asking for my advice and I was trying to do the best that I could. [TS]

  Can't decide whether I followed my heart or my head I don't know which I followed but I followed one [TS]

  and it resulted in me getting an i Phone six. OK i Phone six. [TS]

  Yep and how do you feel about it after about a week or so now week or two of us I think I made a mistake. [TS]

  Oh really how very interesting now. Yeah a mistake in which direction. Too big too small too big too big you know. [TS]

  OK OK I listened it was funny because just in the buildup during the during the time [TS]

  when I was thinking about it I listened to quite a good episode of. [TS]

  Pretty sure it was a talk show with I don't know who John Gruber's guest was [TS]

  but they were talking about the i Phone six and they were both saying I am happy with my six [TS]

  but part of me wishes I've got a five that smaller fine and that pretty much persuaded me I was lucky [TS]

  and I am going to do I'm going to listen to the advice and you know take advantage of all this onslaught [TS]

  and get the five and at the last minute I talked myself out of it and you know I was considering all three [TS]

  and I was making the case for all three and I got the six and the various raise. Yes and it's too big. [TS]

  I can't really you know we've heard all before I can't reach the top. [TS]

  I never thought I would do this but I'm using the reachability trick where you double click the button [TS]

  and all the icons come down lower so you can reach them. I'm using that dozens of times per day. Oh God that's awful. [TS]

  I'm not a cop. [TS]

  I thought when I heard that that was a feature I'm like well you know I think I'd rather she me the phone [TS]

  or you know use two hands than do that but I have my way I like holding a phone and I don't want to change [TS]

  and the reachability is something I'm using I'm I'm not pleased I'm not that pleased with it [TS]

  but I just you know the thing is I bought two I bought one for my wife at the same time [TS]

  and she wanted the i Phone six [TS]

  and for the record let me say she's in love with the i Phone six she thinks it's the best thing ever [TS]

  and she was crazy that I don't like it. [TS]

  So in the interest of fairness she loves it [TS]

  but I would guess just based on that that this is similarly with my wife that your wife probably keeps it one in a [TS]

  handbag [TS]

  and two uses it one handed much less that much I can only imagine that's the case because you got small hands the [TS]

  neighbor she loves [TS]

  and I say I think my problem is I couldn't bear the thought of her having a more powerful than I actually think that's [TS]

  what it was. [TS]

  Just [TS]

  when I was simply not in a competitive jealous Conaway has no idea what I'm laughing because I could understand that [TS]

  and I just I think if she had of knowing that she had a high spec phone the maid is what is so wrong somehow and [TS]

  and as a result I've ended up with the wrong phone. [TS]

  OK so I have one more question for you because we're doing something that I want to take them imagining there are it's [TS]

  Christmas Day There are probably several people who have received i Phone six [TS]

  and only a quarter of the calls are you using the phone with the case. [TS]

  So yes I have I did get the leather case lie my very. [TS]

  He's strong advice because I complained a lot about the six on one of our earlier shows [TS]

  and you know this the same kinds of things and I can't remember when [TS]

  but at some point I decided I'm going to try it without the case [TS]

  and it only makes a difference of a couple millimeters on either side and on the bottom [TS]

  but I have one hundred percent found that this is the difference that makes a difference. [TS]

  And it changed my phone from kind of infuriatingly just too large to barely within acceptable tolerances in terms of [TS]

  size. I still think it's a little too big but I find it surprisingly more usable without a case. [TS]

  So if there's anybody out there who has an i Phone [TS]

  and they're they're getting driven crazy by the one handedness I really recommend trying it without the case. [TS]

  The case is not like it's well done. The problem the problem with the case is. [TS]

  I should have a problem going caseless is that they have made this completely smooth slippery stone that that is like [TS]

  trying to use it as a camera is much harder to hold it there is no place to kind of to grip it [TS]

  and I am much more concerned about dropping it [TS]

  and just using it around the house I find that if I if I'm not paying attention I do just drop it much more like I'm on [TS]

  the couch so I'm not really concerned about dropping it because going to drop on the carpet or whatever [TS]

  but I definitely outside I haven't dropped it [TS]

  but I have made this tradeoff that I think without the case it is much more usable one handed. [TS]

  But still it is only a few millimeters I swear if if Apple made a phone that was just like five millimeters shorter on [TS]

  the diagonal I think I would be totally fine with it but it's just a tiny bit too big. [TS]

  I'm just so brutal on my possessions [TS]

  and if I don't have a case I just know I'm going to scratch it really badly at the moment I can put it in my pocket [TS]

  and sort of have the glass always facing away from things that might scratch it like a wallet. [TS]

  And K.'s and coins and things like that. [TS]

  I know I don't want to I don't run a puppet regime I also think the fact that I need to take into account [TS]

  but I just I just don't take care of stuff there are a lot of hilarious videos of people putting the i Phone six [TS]

  through stress tests you have to realize that the surface of the phone is not glass is not as shareable as you think it [TS]

  is. [TS]

  And so there are some quite amazing like drop test there's a video of some guy who says the phone on fire it is not [TS]

  impervious but it is harder to damage than you think it is going to be if you drop it. [TS]

  I'm not worried about dropping out. I'm not worried about shattering. [TS]

  I just don't want to have a scratch on the screen. [TS]

  You know this is interesting because you know I'm very different this way I used to be like you. [TS]

  Brady and I used to be very fussy about my devices and not having scratches on them [TS]

  but you can decide not to be this person not to care if there are scratches I made this decision [TS]

  and I'm telling you it's a much better life. That's one thing that I don't know the five S. [TS]

  Has they started I had a five to four the sum recognition life changing. [TS]

  Oh yeah without a doubt that is one of the best features they've ever introduced in completely changes the way you use [TS]

  the phone. [TS]

  Yeah that makes getting into it so much quicker now [TS]

  but then makes the frustration not being able to reach the icons that much more frustrating because I think I can get [TS]

  to that frustrating point so many of us are on the right I think we got away with keeping the i Phone six reasonably [TS]

  short if this is a Christmas episode it probably is a good time to talk about the phone again so I don't know that one [TS]

  last one last quick thing you know about the the back gesture on the phone. Probably not. [TS]

  What's OK So we have an i thing about not having a case of before I forget is that if without the case the most [TS]

  but not all but I'd say eighty percent of apps. [TS]

  If there's any kind of back feature like on a podcast app you want to get from the pod cast back to the main list on [TS]

  the browser you want to go to the previous page. [TS]

  If you swipe with your thumb from off the screen on the left hand side kind of across the phone. [TS]

  That will do the back gesture. [TS]

  And so you don't need to hit the back button all the time [TS]

  and that is the one place where the rounded edge of the phone is quite nice [TS]

  and the case totally ruins that feel of sliding over the edge of the phone. [TS]

  I would still say that the rounded edges are not worth it for the nice feel of that back gesture [TS]

  but if you are frustrated with constantly reaching towards the top just be aware that the left to right. [TS]

  Swipe across the phone is back gesture and almost every single application critiquing. [TS]

  It's not Thankee he's pretty kinky is not that you see I think it just is how to use your phone. [TS]

  So hello internet was named like was that one of the top [TS]

  or the best of the favor of the something pod cast in the list of two thousand [TS]

  and fourteen the i Tunes Apple people I don't know what I'm talking about. [TS]

  So it's like you're not you're not on the specificity of a lot of these things I don't know what I'm talking about. [TS]

  But yes we we have been honored and is being selected as one of the best new podcasts of twenty fourteen by Apple. [TS]

  This means that at the top of the i Tunes store if you're in the podcast section there's a big banner for the best of [TS]

  twenty fourteen [TS]

  and we are listed on there with a bunch of other really great podcast so that is is quite an honor to be selected for [TS]

  that. How did this happen is just some administrative mistake or I have no idea how it happened. [TS]

  I just discovered it accidentally. [TS]

  Do we get a gold baton or a trophy or anything I don't know if they sent trophies [TS]

  but if they do I promise that it will go to you. [TS]

  If we if we ever win any awards for hello internet if we win Pulitzer Prizes Nobel Peace Prizes [TS]

  or any of these kinds of things if we win them you can keep them operating. That is my promise to you. [TS]

  You can't keep the money if it's a Nobel Prize. We split the money. [TS]

  Yeah but you know there's a golden button or some kind of statue of a stylized. [TS]

  Person holding an object or whatever these things are you can have them all [TS]

  and I'll be happy to let you have them all you know I'm sending my go but no way. [TS]

  At the start of January I did not know that where is your you to go [TS]

  but I'm going I am sending it to the Mathematical Sciences Research Institute in Berkeley California. [TS]

  The spiritual home of Number Five [TS]

  and they going to put it on the wall because more people say they are in a war it will bring more pleasure than in my [TS]

  dusty old office. Yes I imagine not very many people see it in your office. [TS]

  I don't even say it because it's not actually in my offices in sort of a secondary office of another office for all the [TS]

  stuff I kind of do it actually. [TS]

  It's not and so it's not as if things have their own hold off for now you'd like oh no you wouldn't [TS]

  but you would say you liked it. Like it you know you'd be polite about it. I might not be polite. [TS]

  Now I think you know I think I think it's your kind of dream I've never shown you that a picture of you sooner [TS]

  or later I will make it to your house now and I know you know the name. [TS]

  So yeah thank you Appalachians [TS]

  and they are very much have you know just like a huge rush of sort of people listening to the podcast as a result of [TS]

  you know I serve has been collapsing and. It's you know it's a funny thing. [TS]

  The the the world of pod cast analytics of knowing how many subscribers [TS]

  and how many listeners you have is much fuzzier than the You Tube world we are we are completely spoiled by You Tube [TS]

  and you drown in statistics [TS]

  and I think you have also discovered that they now have a realtime feature which is incredibly addictive to be able to [TS]

  see how videos are performing right now or if you link to things you can see if there's a spike in traffic. [TS]

  You Tube spoils us with data and I find the Podcast world the data is just terrible and vague [TS]

  and it's hard to know precisely how many listeners and how many subscribers. [TS]

  There are that I end up just not checking it very much. [TS]

  I know it I know at the moment that we tend to get between fifty and sixty thousand listens per show [TS]

  but I honestly I don't I don't check the numbers all the time because I just think I go I have no idea I mean no idea [TS]

  how precise this data is but that's that's I guess so [TS]

  but then people will listen on You Tube as well to the you know behind the other ones are they. [TS]

  Do you think of the same people listening again I have no idea. [TS]

  And also the way that our limited analytics work I know that almost certainly things are being undercounted because for [TS]

  boring reasons that people don't care about. [TS]

  Depending on how they listen to the show it may or may not count as a listen so that's why I just it's very strange [TS]

  and again we're just we're just spoiled from You Tube I love all of You Tube's data [TS]

  and it could be a little bit too addicting. Yeah so with a podcast who knows you know he knows he's listening. [TS]

  It could just be your parents. [TS]

  It could just be a couple people who are pretending to be lots of people on the right it is the way it could be. [TS]

  Well let me talk about something that's been in the news because you put a little tweet up before we came on air. [TS]

  If I can say why are you asking if there was anything people wanted to talk about. [TS]

  And lots of people wanted us to talk about the sorry hack. [TS]

  So I said to you on a you know message or do you do you want talk about it [TS]

  and you said something to me that I refused to believe. OK You did not know what it is or what that means to back up. [TS]

  I do often tweet out that we're recording the show and to see what people want to talk about. [TS]

  Almost every time I do this I regret it because I have the same experience which is whatever has kind of happened like [TS]

  today in the news people want to talk about [TS]

  and as we've mentioned on the show before I just I don't really follow the news [TS]

  and so almost always it is a list of things that I just I have no idea what any of this stuff is going for two weeks [TS]

  this isn't something that happened in the last twenty minutes this is like this is Bain one of the biggest news stories [TS]

  in the world for the last two. [TS]

  Next I would say well the problem is I have also been kind of isolation mode trying to get a video out you know even [TS]

  even my my normal my normal connection to the outside world for the past two weeks has been really clamped down because [TS]

  I was I was rushing to hit the headlines so the reason I'm surprised like I think it's great that you do that [TS]

  and all I really respect and I'm jealous of [TS]

  but the reason I'm surprised in this particular case is this is a story that just takes every gray box of something you [TS]

  would be interested in. Well why don't you tell me about it. [TS]

  I feel a bit silly telling you about it because it's a bit like it's a bit like it's such a big thing it's like I feel [TS]

  like everyone will be listening which is which is what happens in a podcast. [TS]

  Everyone's listening and like it's like a mix it's like explaining to someone you know. [TS]

  What nine eleven was or something it's like when you know it's just so famous that that's a big but maybe in two [TS]

  or three weeks it'll be a forgotten story and people can come sailing before. [TS]

  Before we take any steps further presumably is not actually a nine eleven style event because I would have heard about [TS]

  it. Yeah OK OK. [TS]

  And we talk about the news so much [TS]

  but I would say just in general I had this conversation people all the time that people forget how many quote important [TS]

  stories passed through their brain in a year. [TS]

  That's true there's always something that's supposed to happen and it always gets forgotten. A couple weeks later. [TS]

  That's true. [TS]

  There's never any point in the year where you don't go oh what's this or what's that [TS]

  and I have had conversations with people sometimes so I can't believe that you're not following the news about whatever. [TS]

  Yeah and sometimes it sounds really heartless depending on what the whatever is [TS]

  but my point is always the same like almost everything will be forgotten. [TS]

  It's three months max and that is almost always the case so there's always something going on. [TS]

  So I may be sounding incredibly callous Now depending on whatever the Sony has because I don't I don't. [TS]

  No but [TS]

  but it's I guess I want to just hammer home this point because as soon as you tune into this fact you can kind of see [TS]

  the news in a very different way [TS]

  and try to think about how many stories have have passed through your mind in the past year which all of which were [TS]

  presented as incredibly important in the moment. [TS]

  And easily eighty percent of them don't make any difference in a month's time [TS]

  or two months time they just don't matter. [TS]

  I mean probably it was probably also a poor choice for me to say to compare it to nine eleven in that way that I was [TS]

  making the comparison more in the context of I feel silly explaining something that feels famous at the moment [TS]

  and then Oh yeah if I miss a news story I could think of [TS]

  but I'm presuming that the others you meant it in terms of like the amount of coverage that it had Yeah yeah let me [TS]

  tell you what happened [TS]

  and I find it hard to believe that after a couple of sentences you're not going to say oh yes I know about Oka anyway. [TS]

  Well let's lay it on me let's find out. OK Here we go again. One's going to get nervous too I really hate surprises. [TS]

  Well I also feel I feel more nervous because I'm explaining something so that so famous at the moment that people are [TS]

  going to jump on me and say I've done it wrong. OK Because I know you do your best. [TS]

  Signy pictures have been making a film that's about to be released. Coding interview. [TS]

  OK it's a comedy film and the premise is I think two guys are given the opportunity to interview Kim Jong un [TS]

  or the current leader of North Korea comes on like they given that they're given access to him. [TS]

  So the CIA approach these these guys who get the impression a kind of dopey guys and that you know switched on [TS]

  and see this is an opportunity to assassinate him and then these guys go to North Korea and something in his shoes [TS]

  and maybe some assassination attempt takes place at Real Madrid so that was his film and it seems that the film. [TS]

  It was quite the imminent film was going to upset North Korea and then Sony Pictures [TS]

  and Sony itself was the victim of this incredible computer security breach. They got hacked. [TS]

  It's unbelievably Farrelly everything got released all the executive the miles that I've been sending to each other [TS]

  where they're kind of you know slagging off Hollywood stars [TS]

  and saying you know what I don't like about Angelina Jolie [TS]

  and all that all that stuff got accessed all financial details about how much actors on different films got paid [TS]

  compared to each other. Rough Cuts of films that haven't been released. [TS]

  Apparently a draft of the script of the next James Bond movie everything they wouldn't want to come out you can think [TS]

  of got taken and then released and distributed and it's become public knowledge [TS]

  and has gone everywhere like wildfire and the hackers have made it clear it's because of this. [TS]

  This film though all the speculation was that North Korea was behind it because they have a history of hacking this [TS]

  kind of hacking terrorism and so a lot of talk today do or did they get someone to do it for them and in the last day [TS]

  or two now the Americans the CIA are saying we're pretty sure it was North Korea that coming out [TS]

  and saying it was it was it was them on top of that. North Korea have praised the hack but have said it wasn't them. [TS]

  On top of that this film which was going to come out on Christmas [TS]

  or Boxing Day The hackers then started saying we're going to do more [TS]

  and we're warning you not to be in the cinema watching this film [TS]

  when it comes out in the end they even made allusions to nine eleven like they made threats. [TS]

  So all the cinemas got nervous [TS]

  and started saying well we're not going to show this film because we can't guarantee security and that sort of thing [TS]

  and then Sony have pulled the film [TS]

  and said OK we're not going to we're not going to release the film which a lot of people have really condemned as kind [TS]

  of cowing to terrorism and this terrible movie. [TS]

  For free speech and and that's that's launched a whole bunch of stories in itself. [TS]

  So there's all sorts of things going on with this story. [TS]

  The complacency of you know security at big corporations state sponsored hacking [TS]

  and then you know free speech issue so all the stuff's been going on. [TS]

  President's been talking about [TS]

  and stuff this isn't kind of a little fringe story this is been like one of the big stories in the world in the last [TS]

  couple of weeks and it because it is on so many things you find interesting. I thought you'd be all over it. [TS]

  Obviously not and I understand why but OK so here here is the situation I'm in. [TS]

  This is often the situation when news stories come up. [TS]

  I am familiar with the phrase the interview and pulled yet so I have I have seen headlines possibly on Reddit. [TS]

  Yep that's a movie called The interview was pulled. [TS]

  Yeah [TS]

  but that is that before you before you started telling me about stuff that was the full extent of my knowledge I couldn't [TS]

  have told you anything about what the movie was or any any of these other details. [TS]

  Yeah and this is often what I mean by even if you try not to follow the news stuff still makes it through. [TS]

  But but none of the details of this happened to make it through [TS]

  and as you refer to it as my bubble this time out of the interview that that does sound familiar and it being pulled [TS]

  but I didn't know any of the details about the hacking [TS]

  and so that does sound like quite a big story just going off on the details that you have told me it's. [TS]

  It's like a terrible decision on Sony's part. Yeah pull it if I feel like if I was the C.E.O. [TS]

  Of Sony I would release the movie for free on the internet with a lot of things I would suggest that I think I think [TS]

  overall the position has been that it was a bad decision [TS]

  but the irony that seems to be I think even I think maybe the president said I can understand concerns for movie [TS]

  theaters not wanting to show it if there's been threats I think that's a more difficult conversation to have. [TS]

  Yeah but you don't you don't give in to terrorists. Do you know what that you know that was my that was my reaction. [TS]

  Two as well and that remains that remains my instinctive reaction to my I feel like the only response is screw you. [TS]

  Otherwise what North Korea gets to dictate all movie plot lines from now on with Sony that Sony has to run everything [TS]

  by North Korea and that is the ONLY THAT is the only conclusion to this kind of kind of action [TS]

  and so you have to say all right you released a whole bunch of embarrassing stuff about us. [TS]

  That's terrible we wished it hadn't happened but you are not going to dictate our actions. [TS]

  That's kind of like all the you know you don't negotiate with terrorists philosophy is is exactly what you have a [TS]

  choice. [TS]

  You're going to let somebody control your actions or you're not and the only sane thing to do is go with the [TS]

  or not even if that means that there are there are costs you don't let other people dictate your actions so I do. [TS]

  I have read a couple of interesting responses taking a slightly different perspective that pointing out all the ways in [TS]

  which America has at least bent to the fear of terrorism. [TS]

  I mean anyone who has been to an airport in the two thousand [TS]

  and anyone who's ever been to an airport before the two thousands would notice a slight difference. [TS]

  That's not even remotely comparable. [TS]

  I think it is comparable it's all like we we won't we won't live in fear we were in that you affect our lifestyle. [TS]

  Oh my goodness how much how much has the fear of terrorism affected lifestyle in the last fifteen years. [TS]

  Unbelievably people happily was due goes to jump through all these ridiculous hoops at airports [TS]

  and all these other things that have happened since since you know nine eleven and things like that [TS]

  and people say nothing about all these laws that have passed and all these actions that have happened [TS]

  and things that have happened and it's like you know people are just swallow the pill and you pull a movie [TS]

  and suddenly you pull this like flippant comedy movie [TS]

  and suddenly it's like we must not give an inch to these people like. There is a slight contradiction. [TS]

  I do I do see what you're saying. [TS]

  I do see what you're saying I don't think that the airport comparison is an apt one mainly because to me that that that [TS]

  seems like a like a different a different kind of reaction because the terrorists did not say a pilot is like a merry [TS]

  Christmas episode everybody's talking about terrorism the terrorist did not say we want you to install the security [TS]

  features like this is this is the kind of action you take in reaction to how the world is it is not the same thing as a [TS]

  kind of direct command from somebody who's threatening you saying we want you to perform action X. [TS]

  and If you don't perform action X. There will be consequences. [TS]

  That's the kind of statement that I mean you just you can't you can't go along with that. [TS]

  So I don't think the airport security one is comparable [TS]

  but I can feel that there is an argument to be made somewhere here [TS]

  and I think actually that the triviality of the movie is kind of what makes it a much easier decision is to say you [TS]

  should just release this movie anyway. This is not a big. A big discussion about state secrets. I don't know. [TS]

  Yes Anyway it's a bad thing. [TS]

  They're bad people and I feel and a lot of people are not massively sympathetic to Sony [TS]

  and sort of say well you know they've got a track record for getting hacked with their Playstation problems [TS]

  and they lack some big corporate people need to learn to take these things seriously and maybe that's true [TS]

  but I I don't think and there's also been this how you do have a great story full of nuanced arguments. [TS]

  There's this other massive argument about whether or not the media is being too complicit in this and [TS]

  when all these like gossipy emails about from Sony executives about Hollywood stars like should the media just not [TS]

  report that stuff [TS]

  and give the oxygen to the to the what the terrorists want because this stuff getting hacked doesn't matter so much if [TS]

  the media don't then say what disturbs the public to mine. Let's tell these gossipy story. [TS]

  Or ease and compare salaries and have all these bitchy comments between people and what's that. [TS]

  What should the media do here because the media is like condemning the hacking [TS]

  but they're also saying we're now this does public you know afraid to report. We're obliged to report it. [TS]

  I say yeah yeah yeah. Well hey I feel like self respecting places would not do that. [TS]

  But obviously most of the news is as we discussed many times is not self respecting [TS]

  and they want things that are easy that will generate lots of views [TS]

  and this is just the easiest most of you grab this kind of thing to do and that is the nature of the beast [TS]

  and that is that that's obviously just what they're going to do [TS]

  and it makes total sense for them to rabble rousers with one hand [TS]

  and say oh isn't this terrible that's terrible hacking stay tuned to us about the latest details about all the [TS]

  terrorism threats from North Korea [TS]

  and oh by the way let's also talk about the salaries of all of these people isn't it great that we have access to all [TS]

  that information is no surprise. [TS]

  Not surprising at all to me that you would get both sides of this from an organization that is structured the way most [TS]

  news organizations are structured so that not only can I add one more thing. [TS]

  Sure and I will cut this if it turns out I'm completely wrong because I could be completely wrong [TS]

  and shouldn't stand podcast defiant but OK But anyway. [TS]

  I want to add one more thing [TS]

  and this it contains a spoiler for the film that won't be released so I don't know whether you're allowed to spoil [TS]

  things that won't be released anyway. [TS]

  I've seen this video doing the rounds on Reddit [TS]

  and elsewhere which purports to be a scene from the film the film which shows the sort of assassination death of the [TS]

  North Korean leader and I don't know if it's a dream sequence [TS]

  or he dies at the end of the film I don't know what it is [TS]

  but the saying is him in a helicopter being hit by a missile or something [TS]

  and then dying in the quite graphic quite graphic way [TS]

  and that is a really graphic death like it's really in your face you see him being blown up [TS]

  and it's like well that's that's full on. [TS]

  And it's when the film was released in another country that showed that simulated death of Barack Obama [TS]

  or something like that. I imagine a lot of people would be upset and that is is it does it is interesting. [TS]

  I do wonder what would happen if the shoe was on the other foot and I'm not saying the U.S. [TS]

  Would then go and hack into some other countries film companies stuff [TS]

  but it is it is like it's pretty that's pretty interesting stuff to be doing [TS]

  and I know there was a documentary in the U.K. [TS]

  Called the assassination of George Bush and this is not unprecedented but it is an interesting thing [TS]

  when you're starting to make films about the assassinations of currently living people and I'm all for free speech [TS]

  and I'm not saying pull the film [TS]

  and I want to see the film I really want to see the film now because of all this hype [TS]

  and I like some of the actors in it but it was interesting I watched and [TS]

  when I saw that saying I was like if your from [TS]

  or if you're from a really sort of conservative country that respects your late is a bit more than some of the some [TS]

  other countries. That's quite a thing to say. [TS]

  Well I think that's quite a thing so you know I maybe should have a look to me what you think sometime. [TS]

  No I have not done a Brady's paper cut for a while you know yeah [TS]

  and you know I think with the frequency with which I do Brady's Papercuts reflects maybe my mood has not been quite [TS]

  happy the last month or two. Oh yeah oh yeah. [TS]

  This wake up in coming up with loads if you grumpy with the holidays I think of a grumpiness maybe maybe because my [TS]

  sister and family have been in town and they and they had my lovely little nephew with them [TS]

  and I'm not used to having little little boys around an effect on the bright side I think it was him that I have come [TS]

  up with some type of way. [TS]

  OK I'm only going to give you one [TS]

  and save the other ones up if you would give me your best one I'm going to give you the most topical one the best one [TS]

  and I have abs. Lately no doubt. [TS]

  You won't know about this if you don't know about the signing Heck there's no chance you're going to know about the [TS]

  story. OK but you might not even know of this thing that exists but it it baffles me. OK It is called the B.B.C. [TS]

  Sports Personality of the year. Nor Greeley nor have you ever heard of this thing I have never heard of this thing. [TS]

  OK it gets worse. Better be good. [TS]

  Not so bored already we haven't even started talking about it this is this is a contest that grips this this is a night [TS]

  of the year that grips the nation like everyone is so into this and it's treated like such an important thing. [TS]

  But once a year the baby say has this big televised T.V. [TS]

  Show award ceremony like the Oscars where they crown the Sports Personality of the year from Britain. [TS]

  And you have to be British [TS]

  and they choose a short list of like ten people from all different sports so they'll be footballers [TS]

  and racing car drivers and cricketers [TS]

  and you know whoever has excelled that year are usually on the international stage. [TS]

  They poll they they have them together. [TS]

  The public vote on their favorite based on a criteria that is discernable to me it's called Sports Personality of the [TS]

  year. There's no weighting attributed to what you've accomplished compared to what someone else accomplished. [TS]

  There's a public vote and then at the end of the night they announce the winner and they give them this trophy [TS]

  and like and really important sports people win because Britain's Got some good sports people [TS]

  and they're always there and they get up on stage and they really emotional [TS]

  and they talk about it like it's one of the greatest accomplishments of their life like it's it's treated like a really [TS]

  big deal. [TS]

  Even by the people winning it like so this year was won by Lewis Hamilton who's a Formula One world champion which is [TS]

  like a. [TS]

  Big sweep of thing and then he wins this meaningless British popularity contest decided by a phone poll [TS]

  and I swear that gets more coverage than when he actually won the Formula One title. [TS]

  It's a huge thing everyone cares about it. It dates back to the sixty's or seventy's when the B.B.C. [TS]

  Was far more relevant and I guess it was the only thing it was the only T.V. Thing you could watch on T.V. [TS]

  and So it was the centre of one's universe and this was a big T.V. [TS]

  Event and for some reason this is old fashioned ridiculous contest just persists year after year [TS]

  and it just the whole country stops for not to see who wins this meaningless personality contest. [TS]

  Even the name Sports Personality of the year. What does that even mean. It annoys me. I can I can see that it does. [TS]

  Apples to oranges competition I'm not I just like some good size of the Formula One driver comes first [TS]

  and second place is a golf and third place is a woman runner I think it was it's like it's like. [TS]

  And I don't know if it is treated so importantly even by the people living it like they seem sincere [TS]

  when they say this means a lot to me like this is a really big deal thank you Can I ask you something pretty. [TS]

  Yeah I don't understand why this bothers you because other people don't get it because other people think it's [TS]

  important because other people think it has meaning and I want to I want to just sit them down [TS]

  and say listen this has no meaning. [TS]

  It's like it's like if it's like it's once a year the gray family got together in wherever they live North Carolina [TS]

  whatever and they your sat in a room and they all voted OK who's our favorite Pod caster of the year who was a member. [TS]

  Our family and then you want to act and then you made some speech like it meant something to you. [TS]

  It's like it's OK it's parochial and you're allowed to have parochial things and have pretty shiny things [TS]

  but then you can then he has to be some like if I can feel that this really bothers you. [TS]

  But this to me is also the perfect kind of thing that I just I cannot engage with this on any level. [TS]

  Nothing annoys me more than competitions and have nebulous judging criteria. Like if I'm watching a T.V. [TS]

  Show and they're judging something and they say OK you just beat that person [TS]

  and they can explain to me why that person the other person when you say this is this is a popularity contest. [TS]

  Yeah even the people voting. [TS]

  Like what are they supposed to be voting on it [TS]

  and actually said it sounds like if it's Sports Personality of the year it's basically Who do you like best. [TS]

  That's what this sounds like the place. But yeah but a lot based on what my how much people like them. [TS]

  That's why the people who win are really happy about it because it has been demonstrated to them that lots of people [TS]

  not only appreciate their accomplishment in sport but also like them as a person. Well that that makes me even madder. [TS]

  OK OK. [TS]

  I can I can offer no help here except to explain to you that you don't have to follow this this you don't have to [TS]

  participate or be aware of this popularity contest. Yeah now you just kind of kind of a kind of void. [TS]

  I just I never even knew this thing existed until ten minutes ago you also didn't know the Sony hack existed. [TS]

  So I'm not using you as my yardstick for being in touch with society [TS]

  but I am showing you Brady is what is possible in life. I don't want to go as far as I can just imagine some. [TS]

  Huge terrorist attack happening in London and half the population being wiped you not knowing it happened [TS]

  and going out to get milk and like where is it where is everyone. [TS]

  I'm sorry about the sports personality thing I just I can see it bothers you [TS]

  but it just it just strikes me as as one of those things that is interesting to the people who participate in it [TS]

  and not interesting to the people who don't [TS]

  and you cannot explain human interest such love sport so much I'm worried that people who are following this [TS]

  and look at the results are going to think that this means something and they can like they can all right. [TS]

  Athletes accomplishments based on this and I think you gotta let it go very well. [TS]

  Family and the next thing we're going to do in the home is equally completely arbitrary. [TS]

  Having said all that I'm about to break all the rules. Hello Internet. [TS]

  This special Christmas episode is brought to you in part by audible dot com a leading provider of spoken audio [TS]

  information and entertainment. Listen to audio books whenever and wherever you want. [TS]

  Given that it is the holiday season I have a recommendation for you Are you ready Patrick Stewart narrates a Christmas [TS]

  carol. [TS]

  I really don't need to say anything more it is just as amazing as you're probably thinking it is right now as almost [TS]

  anything narrated by Sir Patrick Stewart would be so if you are in the holiday spirit I highly recommend that you go [TS]

  check it out and you can get it for free if you go to audible dot com slash hello internet. [TS]

  You can listen to it for free and get a thirty day trial by going to audible dot com slash hello internet. [TS]

  If you want to listen to it audible has it with over one hundred fifty thousand titles [TS]

  and virtually every genre you'll always find what you're looking for. [TS]

  So once again we thank audible for their sponsorship of hello internet. [TS]

  About a week [TS]

  or two ago I was the one hundred fiftieth anniversary of a famous bridge in England that is very close to where I live. [TS]

  Clifton's. [TS]

  Suspension Bridge and I think he said something online about how much I love bridges and I really love bridges [TS]

  and someone made some comments on Twitter and said you should talk about bridges on the podcast [TS]

  and I was like Oh I'd love to I'd love to. [TS]

  And after all your talk about flags I thought maybe I should be about to talk about bridges. [TS]

  OK but I don't really I have nothing to say about bridges you know. [TS]

  Well that's going to be a problem if you talk of I had plenty of things to say about flags. [TS]

  Yeah though I just really like them and I want to talk about them [TS]

  but I haven't really got any sort of structured reason other than this anniversary of the Clifton Suspension Bridge [TS]

  and also I could see in the news that they're building a new bridge over the Thames in London which I thought would [TS]

  interest you. Oh I haven't heard about the new pedestrian bridge near Waterloo which is going to cost. [TS]

  I've read that it's going to cost like one hundred seventy five million pounds. This is because they're expensive. [TS]

  Well you want to make sure they don't fall down yeah I know that if it cost a lot to make sure it doesn't fall down [TS]

  that's fine. [TS]

  I feel you could do something that went four down for less than that [TS]

  but anyway I'm not you know the cheapness is not my primary concern in the construction of bridges. [TS]

  Yes You know you're not paying for any of it. Presumably I'm paying for it with taxes fine. [TS]

  You know why do we have to spend twice as much to make it ten percent safer that's fine that's fine. [TS]

  So what I thought we could do is you and I H. I gave you a bit of homework. [TS]

  I think I would today say this is a bit rushed but I said let's let's you [TS]

  and I each come up with our five favorite bridges which sounds a bit like a personality context [TS]

  and which Ok so I didn't know the reason for this. You did tell me to do this. [TS]

  Yeah [TS]

  and it's a completely manufactured excuse for us to talk about bridges you have to say this was not made clear to me [TS]

  before he just you told me I need to come up with with five bridges and you did not specify why [TS]

  and the criteria was just bridges of interest to me. [TS]

  Some way that would that's all it was [TS]

  and you had one thing on them you have to have used the bridge I had a very difficult time with this homework I have to [TS]

  admit my brain just I had a difficult time trying to latch on to this of thinking five bridges five bridges that I've [TS]

  been on I don't know I did come up with a list but it took way longer than something should have [TS]

  and I have a few items on this list that I'm not even sure you're going to count so that we can we can begin our [TS]

  conversation about bridges if I've been to a lot of bridges of interest from each of us that we've been on. [TS]

  OK how do you want to know first how we're going to YOU ARE THE ONE WHO YOU ARE THE ONE WHO IS time with his homework [TS]

  you have you have no structure at all. [TS]

  He's just there to talk about what you were not in before I know tell me your number five Bring I didn't I didn't [TS]

  arrange them in order I didn't know they had to be in preference I just have a list of five. Tell me one patrol event. [TS]

  OK. [TS]

  Well OK OK if I have to the one arbitrarily I'm going to pick is the I don't know the name off the top of my head [TS]

  but it's the main bridge in Cologne. [TS]

  I quite like that bridge and it has a nice little feature that people couples write their names on blocks [TS]

  and then there is this like a mesh in the bridge that people connect those little locks to apparently is the thing that [TS]

  is done around the world in many different locations in Japan a lot as well. [TS]

  I have well [TS]

  when I went to Cologne I had literally never heard of this before so this is the first place that I ever came across [TS]

  this and the cologne bridge is a satisfactorily industrial looking I quite like that [TS]

  and then plus the locks I like that feature as well. Nonis is that what you want to talk about. [TS]

  Does that do it for your greater good that's a good start. [TS]

  SCOTT OK story you talked a bit about the bridges kind of industrial looking Yeah yeah a little industrial not OK Brady. [TS]

  Why don't you tell me about a bridge I'm going to give you my number five [TS]

  and this home this is one that I'm reading this is one this. Specially for you. [TS]

  OK I want to have one from Venice because Venice is got brilliant bridges the reality show probably being the most [TS]

  famous the big one that goes over the main canal [TS]

  but probably the second most famous in the one I'm choosing especially if it is the Bridge of Sighs of the Bridge of [TS]

  Sighs. OK and that science is in not sizes in a bridge of great size. [TS]

  I assumed when you set it for me that that's what you mean it's the Bridge of Sighs. [TS]

  Do you know this great have you been have you been to Venice. I haven't it is a long time ago. [TS]

  This is a little bridge that just connects to buildings that goes over a little canal I think it connects the palace [TS]

  and what used to be the prison cells [TS]

  and Legend has it might not be entirely true that after you'd been tried in the palace you obviously were led over this [TS]

  sort of enclosed bridge to be taken away locked away or may be executed [TS]

  and you had one last look at the window of the bridge where you could see sort of the canal and the beauty of Venice [TS]

  and they say prisoners would sigh before. [TS]

  Then taken away to their doom was one final look at the beauty that I was leaving behind. [TS]

  Yeah this this this looks familiar and that sounds like a story I might have heard when I was in Venice. [TS]

  Yeah Addison often keep bridge it is a cute little bridge go on to give us another one. Number four for you. [TS]

  Oh the sounds of the church I look it up on the I don't have a number for these are just all I don't know what all [TS]

  right well I'm just used to portioning members to them for the sake of mine are in reverse order. [TS]

  All right now I have some questions a technicality here. Like you said we have to be on a bridge. [TS]

  Does it count if I've been under the bridge I think undercount Yes that yes that counts. OK Thank you. [TS]

  Because then I was going to come up short if under to what you've already been on four bridges in your life I know I [TS]

  was trying to come up with a list of five bridges that I could remember that were interesting in some way. [TS]

  OK so my next one then is the great belt bridge which is in Denmark. [TS]

  I don't know if you if you know the great belt bridge to sound familiar. It's I don't know I've been to Denmark and St. [TS]

  Some pretty impressive bridges but that one that name doesn't ring a bell. What's going on there. [TS]

  The great I'll have to put up a picture and I guess all of these are going to have pictures in [TS]

  and out a lot of thing you know this is the this is the breaches in the bridge bridges [TS]

  and yeah it's a case of the great belt bridge it is in Denmark [TS]

  and it is the According to Wikipedia is the third longest that it connects these different Danish islands [TS]

  and it is it is enormous. [TS]

  I never knew that his bridge existed until I happened to be on a ship that was going through one of theirs to sort of [TS]

  channel that it goes over. [TS]

  I didn't know that it was coming and then you can just I just saw it on the horizon it's like this thing is enormous [TS]

  and going under the bridge made it feel like it was a thousand times bigger than it actually is. [TS]

  So I thought that that was that that is an interesting [TS]

  and interesting is that a different bridge now is not always on that bridge just recently when I went [TS]

  and this isn't the bridge bridge by the way this isn't the bridge in the T.V. [TS]

  Show the bridge but we do which is Danish T.V. But this I went over this bridge to go and get my model of Pi printed. [TS]

  Oh did you. When I went from Copenhagen to the factory where we did the printing when trying to there we go. [TS]

  Good choice. So do you. No you couldn't piss and my Yeah Am I good at this. [TS]

  Yeah I think you're just so excited to talk about bridges that you're happy to get whatever you can get. [TS]

  Do you know exhausted by bridges are they not just great things just great accomplishments [TS]

  and interesting in so many ways do you not think that I like all markers of human domination over nature which would [TS]

  include bridges [TS]

  but I feel like you are definitely way more excited about this than I am so I would like to hear an expert. [TS]

  Number four I'm going to do the one that just had its birthday the Clifton Suspension Bridge. [TS]

  OK which basically looks like any other famous suspension bridge. [TS]

  Except you know a bit smaller than what most of them are these days but this was like a trailblazer. [TS]

  This was designed by. Isn't bad king timber now. [TS]

  He's like the famous engineer of England and did amazing things across the country [TS]

  and this is considered like his crowning achievement although it was not finished until after he died [TS]

  and it's a beautiful it's beautiful looking it's just it's just a classic classic looking bridge [TS]

  and that's very close to my house and I drive across almost every way [TS]

  and that makes me happy so it's a bit of a hometown hero for me so I'm going to Clifton Suspension Bridge [TS]

  and I want to talk anymore about it because I want to hear another one from you because yours are more exciting because [TS]

  I don't know what's on your list. Give me your number three. [TS]

  The next one I don't know if it'll count as well because the interesting thing is not the bridge itself [TS]

  but many years ago I went to Hong Kong and then I went to China and when I was leaving Hong Kong [TS]

  and going into China you have to pass through this bridge [TS]

  but they have turned the bridge into a big passport check zone. [TS]

  And it was a it was a very strange [TS]

  and very weird experience because it was so obviously a bridge that had been enclosed so it was a long long passageway [TS]

  and it was also just kind of a boring like airport interior on the inside but also with many passport checks. [TS]

  I don't remember what the heck it was but they were just like a lot of desks that you had to go to [TS]

  and people look at your passports and there were you know military looking guys with the dogs walking around [TS]

  and it was it was a strange strange bridge because it really did feel like an airport interior that extended from one [TS]

  sort of kind of a country into another part of that country. So it was it was a strange experience. [TS]

  But the bridge itself is not notable it is the things that the humans have done inside the bridge which is notable [TS]

  but look at this is an engineered bridge. Passports of border politics it sounds like a great fantasy this place. [TS]

  You musta loved it. Well it was interesting. [TS]

  This is also a long time ago where I was not quite the same person that I am today but. [TS]

  It was my experience on the bridge that always may be aware of how Hong Kong is a bit of a strange place which did [TS]

  eventually lead to a video and I was an expert. [TS]

  My Number three is the Hillary suspension bridge which is a bridge you walk over [TS]

  when you go to Mount Everest on the Nepal side as you go to Mount Everest you have to crisscross like ravines [TS]

  and Gorges all the time and you're always going over these suspension bridges that look a bit perilous [TS]

  and sort of you know oxes and cows are going over them and donkeys as well as you [TS]

  and it's you know you feel are you taking your life into your own hands that look terrified. [TS]

  Yeah because the most or you got a picture of it up that I would not cross that bridge. [TS]

  Well that's the that is that is a bridge that I would not cross. [TS]

  That's one of the better looking ones but it is very it is kind of the most famous and picturesque [TS]

  and it's the one that really starts your trip because you cross that bridge [TS]

  and then you go up this really really steep mountain climb [TS]

  and that takes most of the day to get up to a place called neck cheapest So that kind of even though it's the second [TS]

  day of the trek that that bridge from a really marks the start of your climb up to Everest base camp [TS]

  and that's named after Ed Hillary he's a real hero [TS]

  and it is very interesting looking at all the handrails the hand cables have got prayer flags and ribbons [TS]

  and scarves erect around them and they blow in the wind and it looks very spectacular [TS]

  and this bridge is basically one step above the. [TS]

  True bridge that is made of wooden planks in which one wooden plank in the movie always breaks as the characters try to [TS]

  walk across and that is this bridge is better than that in construction but just barely. [TS]

  It's interesting when you when you do this [TS]

  when you do that trek to Everest I'm just looking the first You Tube video that comes up of the Hillary suspension [TS]

  bridge I'm hoping it might actually be mine is mine. I made it I was made a little short video showing it. [TS]

  It's interesting when you do this tricky You see you go over you know it seems like a hundred. [TS]

  Just like like this and they usually made of metal and things like that [TS]

  and I feel I feel pretty safe you get used to them. [TS]

  But in almost all cases about five [TS]

  or six meters below sometimes collapsed sometimes still intact is that cliched wooden broken bridge that you said to me [TS]

  in the US and you look down and you think oh my goodness people used to actually go over there [TS]

  and it's usually rotting away and looks terrible when you're going over the more sturdy one above [TS]

  but you do see lots of cool pictures like that so yeah. [TS]

  Hilary suspension bridge you look to the other side first to make sure there's no cows or or donkeys [TS]

  or anything coming because you don't want to be on the bridge at the same time as those gusts they get right of way. [TS]

  This is again the kind of situation I would not want to put myself [TS]

  and I don't I don't want to ever be at a bridge I have to worry about livestock coming the other way I would love you [TS]

  would love it afterwards you would be so pleased to do that if I hadn't died yes I would love it afterwards that is [TS]

  true. [TS]

  But somebody is going to be the first person that the bridge breaks on you know nobody's going to be that guy ninety. [TS]

  What if you've got a lottery ticket every time you cross. Give us your number to bridge. [TS]

  OK so here's another one that I don't know if you can count it as a bridge if you go any that counted. No more bridges. [TS]

  I gave you one normal bridge I gave you the cologne bridge [TS]

  and most of the one of them saving it for the end which I would say is my favorite bridge is a real bridge. [TS]

  I go I have another one that I think it counts as a bridge although you might not [TS]

  and I would say that it is the Hoover Dam counts as a Brit now have you ever been to the Hoover Dam never have because [TS]

  the one one of the the one time I had a good chance to go there. [TS]

  They weren't letting buses go over because it was too soon after nine eleven [TS]

  and I was on a bus this is going to be a bit confusing for some people because at Hoover Dam they have now finally [TS]

  built an actual bridge that goes over Hoover dam so that the geography of this is a bit confusing but [TS]

  when people think of Hoover Dam They tend to think of something that's kind of level with the surrounding area [TS]

  but that's not. [TS]

  Really the case that Hoover Dam is already a fair bit down inside the gorge through which the river passes. [TS]

  So there is there was ground that is above it [TS]

  and probably since the creation of Hoover Dam they have desperately needed a through road for all the people who are [TS]

  driving by Hoover Dam [TS]

  but don't want to visit Hoover Dam like the thousands of tourists who are clogging up the actual road that goes across [TS]

  the dam. [TS]

  Yeah and so it just actually I think in the past five years [TS]

  or so they have finished the construction of an actual bridge that does go over Hoover Dam So that is not the bridges I [TS]

  am talking about because the first time I went to Hoover Dam That bridge was not there [TS]

  and the second time I went to Hoover Dam That bridge was under construction I can see pictures of it now it's like away [TS]

  from the dam and sort of ruins the look of it in person. [TS]

  It's actually much more impressive than it looks in pictures of these what I saw under construction I thought oh this [TS]

  is kind of cool looking [TS]

  but more importantly it is desperately necessary because both times I have been to Hoover Dam is just a traffic [TS]

  nightmare. I cannot imagine anybody who has to drive across that for non tourist reasons. They must lose their minds. [TS]

  I think it counts as a bridge would you give me that as a Brit I don't think I have a choice. [TS]

  Construction pictures of the Hoover Dam brilliant. [TS]

  They are they are [TS]

  and of anybody if you visit the Hoover Dam You know you can go deep down into the bowels of the Hoover Dam is there is [TS]

  a very interesting place and it has a kind of this architecture that I just love which is the Art Deco. [TS]

  We are humans building amazing things kind of architecture they have these very stylized I think what they call the [TS]

  Hoover Dam angels I'll put a picture of them in the show notes but it is it is just art deco look that I love [TS]

  and so Hoover Dam is done in that style and I really do quite like him. [TS]

  That's borderline for bridge [TS]

  but I'm going to give it to take out of the bridge because I've got nothing else for you [TS]

  and I for my number to you I'm getting into cliche territory here but that's just the way it is. [TS]

  My number two I'm going to go for the Golden Gate Bridge. Yes yes. [TS]

  What can you say it just is man it is what is so awesome. [TS]

  You look at her and it's like a celebrity walked in the room because it is a celebrity bridge [TS]

  and let you know whenever I say it when you're flying into San Francisco [TS]

  and you say it for the first time against the water you that color of a certain And you know you walk across. [TS]

  It's just it's super stuff and you know [TS]

  and because San Francisco has become a bit of a second home at the moment with a number of our stuff you know it's also [TS]

  I feel like I feel a bit of extra loyalty to it. [TS]

  But wherever I am or whatever I'm doing if I can say it I'll look at it. [TS]

  Glover I believe I may have this entirely wrong [TS]

  but I'm dredging up from my memory somewhere that the color of the Golden Gate Bridge is not the color it was intended [TS]

  to be. If I think of that. [TS]

  What if I think the name is an international orange or something or international red [TS]

  or somewhat well that's the name I think it's like it's like a warning color paint that it's some kind of standard [TS]

  but my understanding is like this was supposed to just be during the construction phase [TS]

  but this was not intended to be the the permanent color of the bridge that may be entirely wrong [TS]

  and maybe I'll cut it later if it is or maybe I just won't if I'm feeling lazy so I will leave it on the middle [TS]

  and I love stories of hope a stray you can offend me and I will Kapadia rabbit hole now where you there [TS]

  when I made all the You Tube was a walk across the Golden Gate Bridge. [TS]

  I have walked across the Golden Gate Bridge with a bunch of you two words [TS]

  but I'm not sure if you were talking about this particular is the last you can forget I don't know [TS]

  when you want to do [TS]

  and I just love walking across the Golden Gate Bridge so I was like this will go across the Golden Gate Bridge so we'll [TS]

  drive out there and it was they must have been there and you know via destine and grain [TS]

  and I was there for that I didn't realize that the reason we were walking across the bridge was because of you. [TS]

  Because after about halfway across I kind of been so the pressure because you know that wasn't great weather that day [TS]

  and everyone was kind of like some people in the same day in two [TS]

  and I kind of felt pressure that people enjoy it because I suggested it and then. [TS]

  So I was like oh we can turn back if you want to another people out we're not turning back [TS]

  and you're the one that said we should do it. So they became a bit of a why do we walk all the way across on up. [TS]

  Yes [TS]

  when we were there on that day I think I have a couple of pictures I really like of everybody who was at the new conference [TS]

  on that day going across the bridge [TS]

  and I was fond memories of San Francisco I would suggest one more thing because it's Christmas Day like Don't don't [TS]

  don't actually do it now that is a really good documentary called The Bridge which is very very sad. [TS]

  Completely fascinating and it's one of my favorite documentaries. It's all about the Golden Gate Bridge and suicide. [TS]

  And Merry Christmas. [TS]

  But but seriously like it is a it is a really really really significant and if you like filmmaking and documentaries [TS]

  and things I can't I really recommend. [TS]

  Yeah I guess if you found our conversation about terrorism too uplifting for your Christmas afternoon go ahead [TS]

  and watch that documents it is very good have you have seen it I have not ever. You should watch it. [TS]

  You should want to. I will put on my list. Do it seriously do it. [TS]

  I say I will I will I think you will I think you will I'm not saying you like it I think you take something from I will [TS]

  I'll put on my list. [TS]

  OK Is it my turn is it your turn it's your it's your number one although I know they're not in order. [TS]

  My personal favorite bridge is the golden jubilee bridges which are here in London. [TS]

  The Naming is always slightly confusing because there are two bridges that are kind of on top of each other. [TS]

  One is called the Hungerford Bridge which is a bridge that is just for trains that crosses the Thames at embankment [TS]

  and right on either side of the Hungerford Bridge. [TS]

  Are these two additional footpath only bridges that were built later [TS]

  and those are called the Golden Jubilee bridges built for the queen's golden jubilee. [TS]

  And I absolutely adore these bridges for various reasons I happened to be in that area a lot and every time. [TS]

  My walk across that bridge it just makes me happy. [TS]

  It's in a beautiful spot in the city and good views there yeah you have tremendous views of everything [TS]

  and that skyline in particular I feel like I have walked across that bridge so many times I have taken so many pictures [TS]

  from that bridge. I have more often than I really should just tweeted pictures from that bridge. [TS]

  It's hard to resist because it just makes me very happy [TS]

  and I have seen that skyline now change over I guess the ten eleven twelve eleven I have no idea the more than a decade [TS]

  that I have been here in London I have seen a whole bunch of buildings go up [TS]

  and I love I love seeing that kind of thing [TS]

  and so for me just just personally that is my favorite bridge in the world at this moment [TS]

  and every chance I get I walk across that if people come [TS]

  and visit me I often start if we're going to go for a walk you're like OK let's started embankment [TS]

  and oh look there's that bridge that we get across. [TS]

  Let's walk across it [TS]

  and take a look at all the things so that is my my current favorite out of your kind of London brag to her is that you [TS]

  know are just it's a nice way to see London. [TS]

  Yeah yeah a lot of assets and I mean this is an amazing part of the world and like to you know see Westminster [TS]

  and everything and so you know top that was your it was your mom's probably pretty predictable but [TS]

  but I have to say because it just it is just you know it's it's just it's another soap star and it's the same stuff [TS]

  and then there is the Sydney have a village. Oh of course of course we're going to have to go with the home team. [TS]

  Well I didn't say the Sydney Harbour Bridge till quite late in offered Australian because I didn't go to Sydney till [TS]

  I'm I I'm I've been in my twenty's. I'm not sure. [TS]

  Oh yeah and the first time I saw it with my own eyes it was like that's it [TS]

  and like you can glimpse it from different parts of the city and then you get out on the water [TS]

  and you see in all its glory [TS]

  but no matter where you see it from what angle whether it's you know I saw it on the front on [TS]

  and what it you know you catching a snippet of it between buildings and things like that [TS]

  or the for the for Panorama it's. [TS]

  Brilliant from every angle and I cannot stop looking at it [TS]

  and even even now that I've probably seen a million times I just cannot tear my eyes away from if I if I'm anywhere [TS]

  that has a view of it I have to look at it. [TS]

  A so much bigger than you think it's really industrial and chunky [TS]

  and it manages to manages to look really old from another era while at the same time looking really modern like an [TS]

  amazing piece of engineering [TS]

  and I think it's got it's got everything going for it it's in this incredible beautiful location. [TS]

  It's right in the heart of the city [TS]

  and that Golden Gate Bridge which feels like it's a bit you know pushed away from the heart of San Francisco sort of [TS]

  out in the outskirts of Sydney Harbour Bridge is like this big base in the middle in the middle of everything in the [TS]

  middle of the harbour. [TS]

  I've had some great you know a couple of lovely new years a right underneath the watching fireworks [TS]

  and I was there for the Olympics and it's a great. Said to pace for a celebration. [TS]

  Scott Scott everything Sydney Harbour Bridge really is in the sense of just pulling up on the maps here [TS]

  and it is right in the middle. It couldn't be any more and you know really it's it's got everything. [TS]

  I have not done the bridge climb because lots of people going to ask if I've done it [TS]

  and I was really going to ask because that was not that I know anything about it but [TS]

  when I type in Sydney Harbour Bridge Google immediately says the Sydney Harbour Bridge Climb. [TS]

  Question where and I when I don't let on that yeah I would do it one day [TS]

  but what is it you can you put on harnesses in your harness and you clip onto a rope [TS]

  and you can sort of climb over the span over the action. You know really. [TS]

  Yeah yeah not something that sounds like you day itself I mean you clipped in meekly. [TS]

  And so that sounds better than like you know the the the Mount Everest bridge the Indian returns bridge. [TS]

  Yeah I mean you know I clipped in on that one so I guess if I had to choose between the two it sounds like I would do [TS]

  something I would do the Sydney Harbour Bridge Climb before I would go across. [TS]

  And I think the Hillary bridge will collapse before the Sydney Harbour Bridge does [TS]

  but yes I would also I would also wager that I did have some honorable mentions but I'll save them for another day. [TS]

  Oh yeah the great great so we can continue that was our art was pretty good fun although I'm glad you enjoyed it [TS]

  and it is Christmas. Thank you for humoring me. [TS]

  This is my Christmas gift to you Brady who's talking to you about bridges. [TS]

  So it's time for our Middle Earth corner to use those things first. [TS]

  You released a very popular new video in the last few days as we record all about Lord Of The Rings sort of mythology I [TS]

  have to say. [TS]

  There is surely the geekiest nude iest video of yours that I can remember watching I really think some of them I don't [TS]

  like in terms of here's here's the mythology of something that's already fiction so here's the fiction within the [TS]

  fiction and it's like oh really like you. [TS]

  Good luck you know I learned I learned from I enjoyed it and so have many many other people. [TS]

  That's you know if there are like that. [TS]

  Yeah but it wasn't it was a bit like he is a made up thing and that he is a made up thing within the made up thing [TS]

  and it's like the sort of thing that would take really seriously on the war technically technically they have the [TS]

  angel's brothers of the Sisters of the phone. Your new voice is making me really uncomfortable. [TS]

  If you like of hitting a little too close to home is going to be what that is I don't want to begin there that may take [TS]

  as a compliment but well done on the video I get your bit like a C. Right. [TS]

  It may be the nerdy thing I've done because it is about a fictional universe though I was originally a bit like Onisim [TS]

  it is nerdy but then your nerd voice I think you just convinced me. [TS]

  You're obviously cashing in on the whole but maybe opportunist. [TS]

  Yeah yeah well it's more like this finally got my butt in gear on. Project I'm working on for a long time. [TS]

  I think in particular Henry Minute Physics has probably sick of hearing me mention this project as I mentioned it to [TS]

  him a couple times over the past little while that I was working on this thing [TS]

  and I think he was going to feel a bit like yeah I know I've been hearing about this lore the ring's project for a long [TS]

  time now and seeing a whole bunch of nothing. [TS]

  I was going through my old emails about this project because there are a couple people that I want to put in the [TS]

  Special thanks at the end of the video. [TS]

  One of which is Professor Marilyn who is a token professor who has a website where she talks about this stuff [TS]

  and I realize that I first sent her an email two years ago now where I compiled my initial notes for the very first [TS]

  draft of this video and I sent them to her and she she gave me the thumbs up so that I had it right [TS]

  and then I was trying to work on the video. [TS]

  You don't necessarily have an obviously been working on this for two years [TS]

  but it's I have many projects like this where they have been started and stopped and they have to be paused and then [TS]

  and then re brought back a few times. [TS]

  So this is a project that has been in existence in some form or another for two years but has been activated [TS]

  and then shelved a bunch of times which is also why I think Henry has heard about it from me several times. [TS]

  Sorry I'm just curious before. Before I ask you about your own thoughts on it. [TS]

  What did the professor think of the finished product as she watched the video and tell you what she thought of her. [TS]

  So actually I haven't heard back from her [TS]

  or the other person that I asked was someone who works at Ask Middle Earth dot tumblr dot com which is a very nice like [TS]

  bite sized Web site for frequently asked questions about Middle Earth stuff which people might want to check out. [TS]

  I know that that he he was looking at the final draft of my video and he was looking at the final draft of my script [TS]

  and said that there were there weren't any errors and I saw I saw that he posted on his tumbler [TS]

  and he liked it so that I was going to be pleased with any of anything we should know about behind the scenes one of [TS]

  the things that had been holding up his project for a very long time was I had done. [TS]

  A bunch of initial draft stick figures and unlike many of my other videos this has a lot of characters [TS]

  and kind of particular individuals. [TS]

  And with my with my very limited art abilities I was never able to find a satisfactory way to distinguish between all [TS]

  of the different groups of people and all of the different individuals [TS]

  and so the artwork was really something that was that was holding this project back for a long time [TS]

  and then since I started working with canoe it was one of the very first things I start to think of is like hey maybe I [TS]

  could have this guy help me out with the board of the Rings. [TS]

  And luckily I didn't drive him away with all of my crazy insistence on the facial expression of Queen lion in the last [TS]

  one and so he signed up for another round of lots of picky picky changes for me [TS]

  and we worked together on a bunch of different stuff and I think it came out really great. [TS]

  You know he sent me a bunch of different concepts for how the artwork could be [TS]

  and we kind of narrowed it down to to the way it looks in the end and I'm really thrilled with it. [TS]

  I could never have done this so just as a huge thanks. Huge thanks goes to him with helping me out on this video. [TS]

  So that's that's that's one of the things well done Conneaut. Yeah it looks it looks just great. [TS]

  Should I pay a what's going on here. Oh OK yes if some people saw me complaining on Twitter. [TS]

  So anybody who was a kind of Lord Of The Rings fan knows Tolkien was a big fan of names and so on. [TS]

  All this background stuff a lot of the Rings is a little difficult to get into because not only are there a huge number [TS]

  of characters but also token gives all of them four [TS]

  or five names Elvin names their actual names in their own languages. [TS]

  There's human translations for the names there's just a million names and there's this phenomenon [TS]

  when you read stuff that you just don't have any idea how it's supposed to be pronounced And so here was a problem that [TS]

  I ran into. I'm familiar with lots of these names and I'm reading them and I have an idea of in my head. [TS]

  How they are pronounced. [TS]

  But of course with things that you read [TS]

  and you never hear another person speak out loud because there are not many times in life [TS]

  when you run across someone else who wants to talk out loud with you about the mythology behind The Lord Of The Rings. [TS]

  You don't have a chance to compare pronunciation notes and so I don't know how this kind of slipped my mind [TS]

  but I did not realize until the morning I was I had to record it. [TS]

  This was the day that that the final Hobbit movie was released in the States [TS]

  and I was frantic in the morning like OK I have everything off that I just need to record the audio for this [TS]

  and I realized I don't have any idea how to pronounce some of these names him for real. [TS]

  I know in my head how I pronounce them but I have no idea if I'm going to do this right. [TS]

  And let's just put it this way the kinds of people who get into the talking mythology they are nerdy. [TS]

  A detail oriented people and so I was suddenly terrified that I was going to get all of these wrong [TS]

  but I had to I had to do something really quick and so on a lot of guidelines they have the I.P.A. [TS]

  Listing for how the name should be pronounced I.P.A. [TS]

  Meaning Well OK So anybody who's gone to the articles at the top where you look at some article it'll say like oh here [TS]

  here is the word [TS]

  and then they have a bunch of little symbols which are like funny shaped letters so it's like the upside down [TS]

  or the backwards or the bold eye it's like this string of little characters [TS]

  and I'm sure almost everybody's had this experience where you think oh I'm not quite sure how to pronounce this word [TS]

  and you click on those strange characters [TS]

  and then it takes you to this page that shows you how each of the letters is supposed to be pronounced so that they're [TS]

  like oh you know if you see a bold C It's supposed to be C. As in cat not C. As in scent. [TS]

  Right yeah that that sounds relatively easy [TS]

  but where it gets really hard is with the Val sounds How do you represent what the different valve sounds are supposed [TS]

  to be. [TS]

  So I found myself infuriated the morning that I was supposed to record the audio trying to work through some of the. [TS]

  The I.P.A. Stuff and it was brought to a head. A lot of problems that I have with the I.P.A. [TS]

  I think it is just totally useless. [TS]

  I don't think there is anybody who is not a professional linguist that this stuff actually helps with because you're [TS]

  looking at a word that you don't know how to pronounce [TS]

  and then you have to look at a bunch of symbols that most people are just not familiar with. [TS]

  So in your mind you don't have placeholders for these things you have to think oh I am looking for the finally written [TS]

  H. [TS]

  or This bizarre symbol over here this little line then you have to find it on the list [TS]

  and then on that list it shows you a bunch of other words to try to compare that sound to as if you were trying to do [TS]

  something long like what I was trying to do every will move it's our right this is a name that I wanted to check. [TS]

  You you cannot if you are not already familiar with it successfully use the I.P.A. [TS]

  To tell you how to pronounce this because there are just too many things that you're mentally juggling in your head [TS]

  and then like too many of the vowel things are just are not clear enough and so I just I hate the I.P.A. [TS]

  and It feels like this relic from a bygone era when people had to write dictionaries [TS]

  and there was there was no way of conveying audio information to other people and I was just in period. [TS]

  Why is there not a website where I can copy and paste the I.P.A. [TS]

  Symbols and a computer just spits out the sounds for me that doesn't exist. [TS]

  There's a couple things that were sort of close but just terrible [TS]

  when I tested them against actual words I know how to pronounce it just came out all wrong it's like look look I.P.A. [TS]

  People if you think this system is as consistent as you think it is I should be able to take these symbols [TS]

  and have a computer spit out the sounds but it doesn't seem like this is possible and I was complaining on Twitter [TS]

  and then what irritates me is people who are professional linguists writing back in the OR go to the I.P.A. [TS]

  Is incredibly useful [TS]

  and I am sure if you use this every day that it is a tool that can convey meaning to professionals. [TS]

  But I just think it is it is totally useless for people who don't use it all the time. I've never been in. [TS]

  What do you to successfully figure out how to pronounce a word that I don't already know how to pronounce. [TS]

  Now I will admit that my particular problem is what they call a corner case it does not affect very many people because [TS]

  how often is someone ever trying to find out the pronunciation of a word that doesn't either exist in their own [TS]

  language or an actual language spoken by other humans. I imagine not very often but this is what I'm trying to do. [TS]

  If I'm looking up something like is tare which is an elven word there is surprisingly like few cases I think where [TS]

  someone is ever going to be using the I.P.A. To try to figure out made up words. Well so is it like all of this aside. [TS]

  Yeah and as you know I was going to say I feel your pain but I'd be lying. [TS]

  Yeah I know you do lie but all of this is so odd. [TS]

  Who's the official arbiter of the pronunciation of these words anyway. [TS]

  Because the guy who made them up made them up I should say is dead. [TS]

  And like so how do we go to to find out how you stereo whatever that word like Mike is not just some arbitrary decision [TS]

  anyway how to pronounce a token did have a pronunciation guides. He'd say he wrote one one using lies. [TS]

  It's complicated it will be his guide there are tricky [TS]

  but there are also there are recordings of him actually speaking out loud the names of lots of the stuff I did lots of [TS]

  audio recordings of him but this is the thing if if I wasn't time constrained this would not be such an issue [TS]

  but I had to get this done on the day the movie was being released I figured as I let the clock was ticking [TS]

  and I did not have time to go chase down a whole bunch of stuff to try to find every token recording ever. [TS]

  Anyway that ended up just being a frustrating irritating morning [TS]

  but I also just fine like if people were telling me like lists of the IP stuff [TS]

  and the other problem with this is I'm fine. [TS]

  The things are confusing because well it's almost like [TS]

  when you get if you if you think about a dictionary too long the whole thing just seems insane because you're using [TS]

  words to define words [TS]

  and you can end up getting into these bizarre loops very like oh where these words define themselves like oh God how [TS]

  did this start somewhere and it doesn't start anywhere right they're all just interconnected and the I.P.A. [TS]

  Does the same thing with with human sounds are always writing. [TS]

  Oh it's it's like the sounds in this word wow do you know how I pronounce this word [TS]

  and they try to give you a whole bunch but you think it's so easy to fall off the path here [TS]

  but anyway I just feel like we're in a world now where we can have recordings of stuff let's just use those we don't we [TS]

  don't need to have this this strange system that has such prominence at the top of every Wiki Pedia article just have a [TS]

  just have a button I can click where the word is pronounced don't show me the I.P.A. [TS]

  Stuff it's a totally unhelpful to almost absolutely everybody is is my my problem with the I.P.A. [TS]

  Stuff anyway sorry about that. [TS]

  How do you go in the end it did many people leave comments saying that you got pronunciations wrong as pretty positive [TS]

  that you know of most of them. I'm pretty pleased I nailed most of them I got one slightly wrong. [TS]

  But it's it was it was OK. What woman. OK so I got I got it wrong. [TS]

  Ivana which I think in the video I reversed in the end sounds I think I said you know [TS]

  or I can't I can't quite remember which way I said it but you have [TS]

  and I think I might be saying it wrong right now I suddenly can't remember out now that reel in the video for me. [TS]

  Yeah well you know there's always there's always something there was a typo in the video. [TS]

  It's like there are always typos I can never avoid that [TS]

  but all things considered I was I was very worried about this video because I thought this was a this was a real [TS]

  exercise in leaving out information. [TS]

  I love the Lord Of The Rings stuff and you can go really deep on Lord Of The Rings in the background information and. [TS]

  I find that it is a world that has that perfect mixture of consistency but also mystery. [TS]

  I felt like that is a very difficult balance to get right [TS]

  but I think the token universe just just hits that really perfectly but [TS]

  when I was say I said in the beginning of the video millions of pages is obviously hyperbole [TS]

  and their words were correct I mean they go actually some really you know only has four hundred pages but yet but [TS]

  but like yes I just showed a picture of the sim really [TS]

  and because if people might be vaguely familiar with this book [TS]

  but it's like there's a legendarium there's the token letters. [TS]

  There's all of Christopher Tolkien's writings that there are thousands [TS]

  and thousands of pages of stuff talking about everything that has ever happened and I was I wasn't very manly [TS]

  but anyway so I was worried I was worried that I had to dramatically simplify a whole bunch of the stuff [TS]

  and so I thought I might have just made a video that is to an interesting for most people [TS]

  but actually irritates the hell out of the people who would like it the most as as token fanatics because I had to [TS]

  simplify a whole bunch of stuff and it just strikes me as a video that did not need to be made [TS]

  but that's what I that's what I love about it. [TS]

  Like there's no like it's not like I was sitting there thinking you know I just you know I hope a lot of the Rings OK [TS]

  but I just want to know what they believe behind all that. [TS]

  Well that's been the most fun things is that yeah we like doing lists of bridges. [TS]

  Yeah I don't think anyone will tune into I think [TS]

  and I hope they do of these two bridges because there's absolutely no reason for that you know I was making fun of you [TS]

  before for things that you're interested in [TS]

  but of course this is my version of of the bridge if I miss something I'm intensely interested in this stuff [TS]

  and I totally love it but it is it is not useful in any way [TS]

  and this is again just going to the arbitrariness of human interest. I cannot say why I'm so interested in it really. [TS]

  I can try to come up with reasons but you know ultimately you are interested in stuff [TS]

  or you aren't interested in stuff. [TS]

  But for the record token nerds I just want to I just want to get something on the record here. [TS]

  I am perfectly aware of the great contention over the origin of Orcs. [TS]

  I just had to go with one version of the story [TS]

  and I went with what I think is the simplest one for people who are unfamiliar with the sim really and [TS]

  and all of the other writings. [TS]

  But please no more emails about the actual relationship between milk or and the creation of life. [TS]

  I'm fully aware of this I just this was an exercise in simplification. [TS]

  So there I just want to want to get that on record. But you forgot to mention it. [TS]

  Tell you what you are complaining about your easy bridge homework. [TS]

  Yeah you sent me into Bristol on one of the busiest shopping days of the year at the height of the crowds to go [TS]

  and see the hobbit movie today so that we could talk about it. As you know I did my homework. [TS]

  Did I send you and I think I suggested that this would be something that we might want to do [TS]

  and I'm not sure this was homework homework in the same way that you you commanded that I come up with five bridges [TS]

  and told me nothing about it. [TS]

  No we have we have related to Lord Of The Rings stuff we have both just watched the final Hobbit movie which I did at [TS]

  the same time as we had in way yet we were or our we were in the same location [TS]

  but our movie watching experience was overlaps today to watch The Hobbit the battle of five armies. [TS]

  So we're going to talk about it now away you know we can talk about it now. [TS]

  I took some notes I assume you took some notes as well you know what I was really nobody [TS]

  and I took notes during the film on my i Phone and i was really impressed. [TS]

  Yeah I had generally surprised I did it on a like on an on an email like on an open email [TS]

  and then I don't think I saved it to dry off because I kept calling them so I haven't. [TS]

  Actually got them so I really like seven or eight really interesting notes and you know [TS]

  but you know what you know I'm waiting on I'm going to give you credit for trying. [TS]

  I just assumed that you would take no notes at all [TS]

  but I am quite pleased that you actually at least attempted to take me out. [TS]

  It gets worse I'll tell you a funny story about the end of the film afterwards as well. [TS]

  Let's talk about the film now and I'll have one last check of these nights out here [TS]

  but I'm pretty sure they're not you know I think all my time had us all right but I didn't take it [TS]

  and I do I do believe you. [TS]

  Where do we where do we start talking about this film we both we both obviously had seen the first two [TS]

  and I think we've both spoken in non glowing terms about the first two previously. Yes we have. [TS]

  I'm going to start this with before actually watching the movie. [TS]

  When I purchased tickets because I hate going to the movies I really hate everything about the movies. Yeah. [TS]

  Every once in a while I go to a movie for various reasons and it is not an enjoyable experience something like this [TS]

  or not. [TS]

  Really it's like it's like that but I don't do it much anymore the last year [TS]

  or two I really dial down because of the various reasons and [TS]

  but it's like a real it's a real special occasion for me going to the movies I really like it. [TS]

  Today was one of the first times it didn't feel like that at film and shorter. Well because it was a chore. [TS]

  Yeah why do you why do you hate it just because it involves like factors you can't control everything that in my [TS]

  control I can stop the movie I can't posits I can't murder anybody in the theater who's being irritating. [TS]

  Whereas you can't do that at home I can control the environment. [TS]

  Yeah but I think you haven't got a joy Norma screen I am perfectly willing to pass up the joining. [TS]

  I'm a scream for control without without any hesitation that is that is a trait I'm willing to make. [TS]

  OK so I dislike everything about the movie going experience and so [TS]

  when I was suggesting oh it is my thing to do for a Christmas show I thought OK well let me now I have to go look. [TS]

  We agreed I'm going to go buy tickets and when I was looking I was trying to find tickets for Lord Of The Rings [TS]

  and I discovered fortuitously that one of the theaters near by me has what I'm going to refer to as the airport lounge [TS]

  version of watching a movie. [TS]

  Yeah there's a few nice ones like that and I'm very familiar with this experience [TS]

  and have indulged in that many times now I was completely unaware of this never [TS]

  and this is the first I came across this. [TS]

  But basically for five pounds more on the ticket which considering the ticket I think would have been fifteen pounds [TS]

  anyway. You can get these big recliner seats. [TS]

  If you can have like a waiter who comes over and brings you popcorn [TS]

  when you press a button that your screen is much smaller but you're in a much smaller space [TS]

  and because it's more expensive that acts as a child filter. [TS]

  People with lots of children don't want to go into the more expensive area and I thought man this is just like [TS]

  when I was going to be stuck in Dulles Airport for many hours of uncomfortableness I was going into this movie [TS]

  expecting many hours of uncomfortableness [TS]

  and so I thought this is exactly the moment I am happy to pay a little bit more to make this experience as comfortable [TS]

  as possible and so I went into the kind of lounge area to watch a movie [TS]

  and it mitigated a very large number of my complaints about movies all of which center mostly around other people. [TS]

  So no I had I had a. That's our innovation. [TS]

  Yeah it was interesting to discover and I still don't like movies but having discovered the lounge. [TS]

  More amenable to going to movies in the future so that was one hundred percent worth it you know something also an [TS]

  interesting one and it gave me a little insight into maybe you know the life of the film critic and people like that. [TS]

  Lou this was one of the first times I could remember going to a film like for work reasons knowing that I was going to [TS]

  have to talk about it and it's inevitable you start thinking about what you're thinking [TS]

  and what you might say in the podcast and things like that and it really affects the way you watch the film [TS]

  but also it starts then you start thinking [TS]

  and then I started thinking about the fact that it was affecting my thinking [TS]

  and then I could talk right there on the pod cast and try to get all these layers like Inception [TS]

  and like I started like [TS]

  and then I could talk about the fact that I was talking about the fact that I was talking about the fact that I was [TS]

  talking about it. They kind of did my head in a bit and the film hadn't even started. Yes yes it's a different expense. [TS]

  I kept thinking about a while ago I read an article talking about Roger Ebert's work routine for reviewing movies [TS]

  and it just it was interesting he would talk about he always did things on hand written note pads [TS]

  and just made no attempt to organize stuff while he was watching the movie [TS]

  and so at the at the end of his movie experience there'd be a whole bunch of sheets just laying around him that he just [TS]

  torn off the pad as he kept writing stuff [TS]

  and you know presumably of course secretary later had to try to put it all in order and collect things together. [TS]

  But yes I was aware that immediately as well that they're watching a movie. [TS]

  Knowing that you're going to talk about it is a slightly different experience than just watching a movie. Regularly. [TS]

  Did you have low expectations I have to admit there was a chance I probably would not say in this film at the cinema. [TS]

  Thank you so burned by the previous to I love the Lord Of The Rings trilogy. Let me just put my cards on the table. [TS]

  Yeah. I've not read any books really read none of them really. I'm not I am not a fan you in any way. [TS]

  So you haven't you haven't read any of the mythology either them yes no I I don't I read those thousands of pages but. [TS]

  And if the book was just not in-depth enough for me so I can have a discussion with you about the differences between [TS]

  the three ages you know that's when I can have the cottage where you can have it just it is why pay is moderation. [TS]

  I really enjoyed the three Lord of the Rings films masterpieces I think. [TS]

  They're not without flaws and occasionally go a bit tedious [TS]

  but overall I really liked them I still really watch them sometimes on a winter's day I'll sit down and watch one [TS]

  or two of them you know. [TS]

  Thanks I think right and then I thought the first two films were real disappointments and we've discussed it before [TS]

  and to the point where I did not have high hopes attached to this one. Yeah there's my There's my son. [TS]

  There's my starting point for today. But let me let me let me do a similar thing. [TS]

  People may not be aware I'm a fan of Lord Of The Rings but I too I love the original Lord Of The Rings movies [TS]

  and I have watched all of the extended editions I used to have a D.V.D. [TS]

  Box set with all of the background like dozens [TS]

  and dozens of hours of the making of those movies I consumed all of that I just loved it [TS]

  and more importantly I think that those original three movies are a masterful example of how to take books [TS]

  and film them because you just you cannot just be completely faithful to a book when you make a movie. [TS]

  These are fundamentally different mediums [TS]

  and I just think I have never seen a better book to book to movie transition [TS]

  and the Lord Of The Rings movies so I can enjoy both of them I really like them. [TS]

  Obviously I did not like the other movies they are a perfect example of how not to do a book to movie transition. [TS]

  They're just terrified and that's the sign is the same. [TS]

  Mike I was even staying through the credits again of this one and I was looking [TS]

  and I was like yep there is Philip one of the main writers from the last one who have seen a million interviews with on [TS]

  the acts. [TS]

  Here's who seemed really competent then and you know she's working with Peter Jackson [TS]

  and is like I know all of the I know well enough to recognize all of the writers and the producers [TS]

  and I've seen interviews of these people and it's just mind boggling to me that it's all the same team. [TS]

  But yes I didn't like the first two Hobbit movies [TS]

  and so I was going into this one with things with exactly zero expectations whatsoever not even low expectations just [TS]

  nothing so there is my starting point. So you like the movie and you think what you think of it. [TS]

  You get thumbs up thumbs down thumbs down. Yeah. Dumbed down. Tedious. Yeah. [TS]

  Thankfully it didn't seem too long blocking to get in the same as long as the other ones. I didn't dislike her. [TS]

  I was just completely it was just like I was completely not engaged with it at all. [TS]

  I couldn't it was just repetitive and boring not like not like it didn't make me angry. [TS]

  I wasn't thinking this is really bad like in the first one [TS]

  when that singing dancing things going on in in the hobbit house I was like oh yes and what a joke this is terrible. [TS]

  It was never like that it was never like oh it was like watching a Twilight movie where you think this is the worst [TS]

  thing that has ever been committed to sell you Lowenthal virtues. Yeah it wasn't like that. Well it didn't offend me. [TS]

  That's just a complete I just think it just completely failed to engage me in it didn't I didn't care I didn't excite [TS]

  me [TS]

  and I wasn't impressed by the filmmaking like I was in The Lord Of The Rings just that all the things that the Lord Of [TS]

  The Rings did well this failed [TS]

  and the one my one complaint about the Lord Of The Rings films is that the battle scenes are a bit drag on a bit [TS]

  and are a bit too much and this film was just like one epic one of those battles. Yeah. [TS]

  So in a funny coincidence I have been rereading The Hobbit [TS]

  and I actually just finished reading The Hobbit this morning before going then to see the final movie [TS]

  and to be clear I am not complaining about differences that are from the book you have to do things differently. [TS]

  But the battle of the five armies in the book The Hobbit the entirety of it is maybe maybe two and a half pages. [TS]

  No it is the briefest thing that happens [TS]

  and I always think Tolkien Spoilers for The Hobbit people still can pull of the great move where he clearly doesn't [TS]

  like to write about battles in the actual books there are not many battles described in great detail [TS]

  and so in The Hobbit he describes the kind of set up here the armies. [TS]

  Here's where the Orcs are they are advancing this way humans are on one side the mountain Elves on the other side [TS]

  and the Eagles come in. [TS]

  But then Bilbo gets knocked out gets knocked unconscious [TS]

  and this somehow token the author to just skip the whole battle right. [TS]

  You turn the page and Bilbo wakes up when the battle is over [TS]

  and somebody then just quickly relays to him what happened. [TS]

  So the actual battle is like nothing at all [TS]

  and then this movie is four hours of a battle which again could be done well because a movie is a visual medium [TS]

  and I think that the last time I remember being blown away by special effects in a movie theater was the final Lord Of [TS]

  The Rings movie and the final battle in that movie that was the last time I remember really feeling much [TS]

  but it was pretty good it was like I'm not saying it was a great battle scene [TS]

  and watching it later in life I have found it a little bit long. [TS]

  But at the time [TS]

  when I saw that was like the last time I was really blown away by special effects because I would come on what I was [TS]

  watching this battle tonight. Yeah it's endless and inspected and I know I was imagining. [TS]

  Is he doing this because he's being loyal to the book and then if if he was which I now know he wasn't [TS]

  but if he was I was trying to imagine how the book wrote this [TS]

  and basically it would this is how the book would read it would be you know the more the whore from the north of the [TS]

  hall took his broad sword and he swore to God to his left. [TS]

  Kutiman Yes Want to go on to his right and then he swiped another guy to his left and then he fell over [TS]

  and then some giant based was just about to kill him. [TS]

  And just before the Big based hero more from the West suddenly appeared and shot him with an arrow. [TS]

  Whew that was really close. Yeah. [TS]

  Repeat this nineteen times and then and then a great horn sounded and everyone looked to their right [TS]

  and yet another army that you don't care about and know nothing about suddenly appeared on the crest of the mountain [TS]

  and came running down the mountain and come off a horse from the south swiped one to the left [TS]

  and swiped one to the right and then he fell over and he was just about to die again [TS]

  and you were sure he was going to die this time. [TS]

  And at the last possible moment Cindy the wizard from the east jumped in then and repeat that nineteen times [TS]

  and then another horn sounds and another army appears [TS]

  and is like goodness sake I don't even know who these armies are I don't know who these characters are I don't know who [TS]

  I am supposed to support the people who I thought were the good guys are suddenly going to be evil is this is the ring [TS]

  a big deal that I know the ring is famous but now all they care about is some stone [TS]

  and these other guys are after some necklace and I'm not I want to the gold [TS]

  and then there's some other battle going off somewhere else and some people are gone. [TS]

  I'm on a mission somewhere else and I don't know who they are [TS]

  and what they're looking for I don't know who I am I don't know who I want to [TS]

  when the only person I care about is the hub but because Ron the famous pretty good actor [TS]

  and he was an excellent choice for Bill but yeah he's a he's good so you know I hope he lives [TS]

  and I know he lives so there's no you know there's no tension there because the one person I care about I know he's [TS]

  going to live like goodness May That's why I would but also I didn't want to [TS]

  when the film was made as much like the first three films Peter Jackson felt like this kind of Cecille B. [TS]

  Demille guy to me it's like he had gone back to old school filmmaking and it felt like he was building big things [TS]

  and there were lots of people there and he was making this epic film and use lots of effects very well [TS]

  but it felt like a lot of it was real as well and this one felt a lot more. A lot more facts driven. [TS]

  Yeah if you know he's been drinkin. [TS]

  George Lucas Yeah and yeah like it's like you know that I'm not small expensive maybe [TS]

  but one of the nice things about Lord Of The Rings was so dirty it felt like they had dirt on their hands [TS]

  and they were real rocks and swords and this fella law fake in every way. [TS]

  Yeah yeah it's funny you mention that because I had the same the same feeling which again is like the Star Wars [TS]

  original prequels versus the later ones where I was I was really aware in lots of the big army scenes that it just [TS]

  looked so C.G.I. Which is really interesting because of course the original movie used tons of C.G.I. [TS]

  To fill and fill in these characters but they did a much better job of mixing actual live action with overhead C.G.I. [TS]

  Shots to make it feel much more real [TS]

  and here is like oh i'll let me watch these two computer armies fight each other is no no interest whatsoever [TS]

  but your description of the beginning of the movie right. So here's the story of my notes. [TS]

  I go into this movie and I have no expectations [TS]

  and I felt for I was going to say for the first half of the movie I felt like I was sitting there [TS]

  and I just had no reaction whatsoever to anything like that like I was this empty vessel through which light [TS]

  and sound was passing and I was just I was connected to absolutely nothing [TS]

  and so I have almost no notes from the beginning of it. [TS]

  They said I noticed a couple of things that I thought were interesting that like one this movie made no attempt to help [TS]

  anybody who just showed up at this point. [TS]

  They know who they're selling these tickets to it's people who watched the first two you know. [TS]

  Good luck to you if you don't know who these people are the first half of that I had just no reaction whatsoever. [TS]

  And I was thinking I can give this movie a kind of mess like it made no impression on me whatsoever. Yeah. [TS]

  But then but then about halfway through suddenly my notes start [TS]

  and my notes start with the line that Gandalf says about how the Orcs have this whole other second army they've been [TS]

  holding back that are about to arrive. I know it says a second front approaches. Question mark. [TS]

  Oh no I thought the movie was over. [TS]

  Yeah and this was exactly my feeling as like the movie suddenly turned for me where. [TS]

  I felt like it was wrapping up and I had already felt like I had been sitting there for a long time [TS]

  and I just had no reaction. [TS]

  And then there is there was just as much to continue sitting through with this second front of orcs that approach [TS]

  and what that was supposed to be imagining what that was supposed to be like a dramatic twist. [TS]

  Well so it wasn't supposed we supposed to go on on you [TS]

  but I was so disengaged maybe I was the same it was just like oh OK another battle. [TS]

  Yeah it was it was it was just I cannot believe that this is this is going to continue onward [TS]

  and yet they could have ended the movie right there and it would have made no difference to anything whatsoever [TS]

  and then I think which you picked up on. You mentioned it and I had a little common in my notes which was. [TS]

  I can not believe that they did something which was they had not not once not twice [TS]

  but thrice they had the same shot of hero on the ground big troll creature over the hero dramatically lifts hammer [TS]

  slash sword over its head to smash the hero on the ground and at the last second somebody off camera jumps on the orc [TS]

  or shoots it right you just expect it now. [TS]

  Yes well no drama because you know it's going to happen so OK I don't know if I have to tell you that here here was the [TS]

  thing. So they do it once OK you get one of these in a movie that's fine. [TS]

  You know OK they did it a second time and I thought Did they forget that they already did this shot in the movie. [TS]

  Right they forget like this is the second troll that I've seen doing this exact same thing where someone stops at the [TS]

  last moment. [TS]

  Now here's the thing the third time spoilers obviously people the third time it's torn open shield on the ground who I [TS]

  know perfectly well from the books is going to die [TS]

  and I had a brief moment where I thought I think Peter Jackson has just done something brilliant here we have seen him [TS]

  twice the hero come from off screen to save our main character but I know thorn is going to die [TS]

  and they're setting us up in this third shot and I thought man this is going to be a hell of a movie moment. [TS]

  If this character with his gigantic hammer just smashes Thornell can shield dead right because they've trained us to [TS]

  expect someone to jump in and it's going to be really shocking when they don't. Nope nope not at all. [TS]

  They just view the exact same shot three times and the thing that killed me was the slow down time each time. [TS]

  It's like how can you watch this movie [TS]

  and not keep track of this that I found that just like for a brief moment I really did think this is going to even if [TS]

  the rest of the movie is terrible. This isn't him. Anything set up that is going to work great. Now opportunity missed. [TS]

  We just have a hero save him again. [TS]

  And you know we've we've talked about this a little bit offline as well [TS]

  but this movie is again an example of action scenes that just don't engage you like action scenes that have no sense of [TS]

  danger. There was one part I made I made a note about as well. [TS]

  This is like again hundreds of of orcs and dwarves and elves and everybody's fighting. [TS]

  It just goes on and on forever with the shop where there's another wave of Orks that have just arrived [TS]

  and they kind of catch Bilbo off guard. Yeah and he bends down and picks up a handful of rocks. [TS]

  Now Bilbo is a tiny halfling. These Orcs are gigantic and tough creatures that are wearing armor. [TS]

  Yeah Bilbo one shots for her life of the orcs with stones that he's throwing from his hands. [TS]

  Yeah [TS]

  and this to me is exactly the kind they like don't filmmakers understand there's no sense of danger here are these are [TS]

  these creatures dangerous or can a tiny pebble thrown by what is basically a child completely kill [TS]

  or knock out five of them just immediately because and we're told these are like these guys are bred for fighting. [TS]

  Yeah and but then like you know you run into the front [TS]

  and every end always the lead guy the leader of the army who runs into one of these fronts [TS]

  and I lost I lost count of the number of times some some hero he leads the charge into a huge wall of the ambulance. [TS]

  They always go in with this old and take down fifteen or twenty of them before anyone knows what's going on. [TS]

  Like just to the guys in the front of these fronts. [TS]

  Like do they ever land a punch or a solo or like it's just it's like yes like stormtroopers isn't always missing [TS]

  and stuff I know but it's just slime but but there's there's a difference here where you can. [TS]

  This reasonably well and I think that the original Lord Of The Rings does a much better job with this. [TS]

  Where again spoilers to the Beach Boys forever I was going stop saying it but in the original [TS]

  or the rings they kind of draw a better distinction between goblins which are really small and numerous [TS]

  but they also kind of give you the impression that the goblins are maybe not the best at fighting cannon fodder. [TS]

  Yeah and so you can have just tons of them [TS]

  and you can much more easily accept that the goblins advantages in their numbers. [TS]

  Yeah right [TS]

  but then you have the irq which are built up as these of the ultra super soldiers in the first movie the irq kill one [TS]

  of the major characters. That's how you establish that there's actual there's an actual threat here. [TS]

  Yes there is something to be lost and when the work I show up it is always actually bad news [TS]

  and then the Orcs are kind of somewhere in the middle. [TS]

  But yeah this movie it's like oh are they really tough or are they not really tough it's just [TS]

  when you need thousands of them to die they just die. [TS]

  When you need them to be scary they're suddenly scary it doesn't it doesn't work like that movie you have to establish [TS]

  what's what the boundaries are. [TS]

  But I really did I felt back I laughed out loud in the theater when [TS]

  when Bilbo is just like pow pow pow one shotting these guys [TS]

  and they just they just fall over from a pebble that hits them against their clearly armored had the other saying that [TS]

  was really jokey like that in a video game he was when that guy jumped in the trolley to save his kids [TS]

  and rode down the oh yeah and yeah they just know [TS]

  and I was barred I was barred saving his fam I just felt that there was a tremendously cheesy scene where the kind of [TS]

  weasely the weasely guy asks ask the main character Bard you know what why are you fighting for this fight [TS]

  and the camera just rotate so that his family comes right into view and I bar doesn't even like say anything. [TS]

  Oh it is the weasely guy supposed to know the camera moved it just occurred here. [TS]

  And it's like oh well I guess we're doing it for my family. [TS]

  Yeah it's funny because again like the first half of the movie just left no impression [TS]

  and then I suddenly have a thousand notes about things that I could not stand in the second half because it was like it [TS]

  just crossed my threshold of too long. [TS]

  Suddenly an interesting gift suddenly I have you know like it didn't I don't know how long it was [TS]

  but it didn't it was too long but I will I will agree I don't know off the top my head the running time [TS]

  but I'm willing to bet that this was shorter than the others. [TS]

  I did feel it did feel shorter but still still just way way over the top and I know but I'm going to hate. [TS]

  I didn't I didn't like but I didn't hate the opening sequence with the dragon [TS]

  and I'm glad I kind of just dispense it was still too much but they dispensed of it reasonably quickly [TS]

  and I did like that and it made me like that guy who killed the dragon it made me like him [TS]

  and he became my second favorite character so yeah it was. [TS]

  There's some merit to that opening sequence before the opening title comes on the screen that was yes that was [TS]

  and this is this is a particular moment here as well this is another example of movies have to be different from books [TS]

  and so on. In the book that character barred It's guess and I was unreal when I say this. [TS]

  You've been reading this whole book about the Hobbits and the dragon [TS]

  and the dragon flies off to go exactly town talk [TS]

  and then introduces the character of Bard has barred killed the dragon [TS]

  and the chapter without ever mentioning him again in the space of maybe three pages. [TS]

  That's the kind of thing you can possibly do in a movie you can't be like oh the dragon flies off [TS]

  and this dude you've never heard of just kills him. Oh and then we're never going to mention him again. [TS]

  Frank you have to change things in the movie any you can get away with that in a book in a way that you just never ever [TS]

  could on film. So again I'm totally OK with him being like a big character that none of this exists in the book. [TS]

  That's perfectly fine. [TS]

  You have to you have to make changes but there are just so many so many bizarre changes [TS]

  and so many things that just go on. For ever. [TS]

  That I couldn't understand it also too many people like and and too many people I don't relate to. [TS]

  It's like like I don't want to harp on about Star Wars and I know it's good to have subplots and you know intrigue [TS]

  and even Star Wars has some plots but Star Wars does just simple wasn't it. [TS]

  There was a there was a young guy with floppy hair that was a bit like you and he wanted to win [TS]

  and there was a guy that was obviously bad in a black suit. He wanted to die right. [TS]

  And there was a pretty princess and you wondered who was going to kiss the princess because she was pretty right [TS]

  and that was it. And like everything else was just you know and then everything stems from that. [TS]

  But watching this film to me I was like. [TS]

  So there are like five or six guys who seem to be good but a couple of more they seem to be bad. [TS]

  Yeah and there's a few and that woman will form and for some reason loves that. [TS]

  Well if that was the one where she cries because he's dead get away I can I can I stop [TS]

  or you're going to have your play had to write down this dialogue word for word because it was so awful [TS]

  when her this whole love triangle does not exist in the book so this is just bizarre and I don't understand. [TS]

  She says if this is love why does it hurt so much and then the Elven King says to her because it was real [TS]

  and it's like oh my god I just felt nothing I felt nothing for anyone and it was so humorless [TS]

  and mun Freeman was trying to be funny occasionally I guess but the film was completely devoid of humor [TS]

  and that's not a frame and strength you know I use him he could bring you know and occasionally he tried. [TS]

  Yeah [TS]

  and the character in the books like Martin Freeman is excellently cast because he could pull off this kind of I'm a guy [TS]

  who's in a situation that is far beyond what I'm supposed to be doing. Yeah he is under you. Used in the movies. [TS]

  But there but there were a bunch of just weird moments where the movie did try to be funny [TS]

  and I thought it just it fell yeah fell flat and again it was this weird tone shift where is this movie serious movie. [TS]

  You can have funny moments in a serious movie but they were just things that became oh is this comical. [TS]

  Like they had a troll Siege Engine where this troll runs up to a wall and smashes it oh yeah [TS]

  but they have him then comically fall backwards unconscious it was it was one step away from having little birdies [TS]

  flying around his head in a circle on on screen [TS]

  when he falls over as like oh is this a dramatic scene where the wall has been breached and so I should care [TS]

  or is this a funny moment with a troll you can't mix you can't mix those two things together. [TS]

  They seem to try and give us the funny lines to Gandalf and I'm not convinced he's very good or funny. [TS]

  He's like Yeah I don't think he's very good. [TS]

  The original trilogy had given me and Haney and him leaving work and he will himself. [TS]

  There's no character in these films that pulled it off. [TS]

  Yeah I think he was on the edge [TS]

  but totally totally works I was just trying to look at some of my notes here of disliking things that irritate the crap [TS]

  out of me. [TS]

  Oh OK OK OK So the final the final fight between Thor and Okan shield [TS]

  and I can't member which which anyone throws on the ice Yeah yeah yeah on the ice. [TS]

  He's a character that is mentioned in a single line in The Hobbit which is like an incidental person that they turned [TS]

  into this enormous thing and it's him and his son and I can never remember which one is which [TS]

  but anyway so the final fight between the two of them about the Defiler [TS]

  or something oh yeah yeah it's so I know concealed and it's him and they're standing on this ice [TS]

  and they're fighting each other. OK For some reason who knows where maybe I blinked I wasn't paying attention. [TS]

  Suddenly our main villain is orc has this long rock at the end of a chain that he's swinging around and trying to hit. [TS]

  Thor no can shield when [TS]

  and it was just in this fight scene went on It felt like for five minutes of our orc trying to hit a thorn oak [TS]

  and shield and it reminds me a little bit of like when I saw Avatar which is a movie I did not like [TS]

  and I find myself rooting for the villains to just can we just finish this. [TS]

  Until I find myself in the theater if you like can you just can you just hit him already I know he's going to die. [TS]

  Just kill him. So this can end and then it's really irritating. [TS]

  You're using a mid range weapon for close melee fight like he's he's within feet of you [TS]

  and one of your arms is a giant sword and you're eight feet taller than him. Yeah just stab him. [TS]

  Just stab him right there. You're within range. [TS]

  The only reason you're using his big weapon is so that you can dramatically miss him as you slowly swing it around like [TS]

  this is you're using like a siege weapon in close combat this makes no sense at all. [TS]

  He's within range just ab [TS]

  and the other thing I kept thinking of there was like again this like we have no sense of the danger of anything is. [TS]

  In The Lord Of The Rings books there are not many descriptions of individual dwarves ever taking on trolls. [TS]

  They're always doing it as an army because that's the only thing that makes any sense because he's eight feet tall [TS]

  and he's fighting a dwarf and I was thinking I bet if you took a kid who's like six years old [TS]

  and tried to train him to be the best fighter in the world and put him in armor [TS]

  and then you you had me with a long sword versus this kid I bet I could kill that kid just because I'm WAY bigger. [TS]

  It doesn't matter how good you are at fighting if someone just massively bigger than you you're going to lose if it's [TS]

  coming down to to close combat it doesn't make any sense. [TS]

  They don't the only way you can get around that is that they like Dungeons [TS]

  and Dragons staff here is if you have amazing agility but [TS]

  when I think of dwarves do you think of really agile creatures is that one of their fundamental characteristics. [TS]

  Obviously not if it's like that it's like a Spider-Man phenomenon Spider-Man fights villains who are massively more [TS]

  strong than him [TS]

  but his primary ability is his agility to avoid blows like this is not the situation here with his with his dwarf [TS]

  versus this gigantic incredibly strong orc loses all sense of danger it just it just means it means nothing. [TS]

  We do it in James Bond movies [TS]

  when like Goldfinger straps bombs to a table with a slow moving laser that's going to cut him in ten minutes rather [TS]

  than just putting a bullet in his head. [TS]

  But here's the thing it all comes down to the movie's kind of establishing what they are and Bond movies. [TS]

  At least the older ones like like with the slow moving lasers. [TS]

  They don't establish themselves as super serious films right [TS]

  and they're getting you know they're kind of light hearted and they're kind of the kind of campy. [TS]

  And The Hobbit is just going so hard to convince you like this is a serious important movie that you can then have [TS]

  cartoon physics everywhere if it's a serious important movie. [TS]

  These things don't mix so two other two other quick things. [TS]

  Yeah maybe I missed something [TS]

  but this phone you can hear for the first half of the film he's like bad he's being you know he's he's going a bit [TS]

  loopy because of the evil and he's gone off the rails. [TS]

  Yeah and then halfway through he just seems to change his mind and I realize the error of his ways [TS]

  and says actually now I'm going to be a good guy now and we're all going to hug and be buddies. [TS]

  Was there some payoff to transformation that I missed that made him go from bad to good like I didn't get the [TS]

  redemption I didn't see that I didn't see the Emperor a lot. [TS]

  Moment where suddenly he realized the error of his ways [TS]

  and switch he does have this kind of little thing down in the vaults and then came back to him all right. [TS]

  I was worrying and import him pointless. Yeah there was no real transition like that. [TS]

  OK I was making sure I wasn't texting or something and Miss No you didn't miss anything but [TS]

  but my final note here time and unresolved things again a moment I kind of laughed out loud and felt bad [TS]

  but luckily there were very few people in the theater with me was after the fight that lasts for a thousand years. [TS]

  All of a sudden they're back in the Shire so Bilbo leaves and they they just flash forward [TS]

  and suddenly Oh Gandalf is dropping him off at the Shire and he's going home. I thought hey wait a minute. [TS]

  What on earth happened to the whole point of this entire battle because the men and the elves [TS]

  and the Dwarves had a disagreement over how the treasure was going to be a lot of hand writes right there [TS]

  when there was no there was no conclusion to this. Yeah right. They just say oh the battles over and boom. [TS]

  Bilbo's back in the Shire [TS]

  and there was there was no resolution to what was the actual point of the entire fight what is going to happen. [TS]

  Do that do right do the men of Lake Town do they get money to help them rebuild. Do the elves get their gems. [TS]

  What happens with the with the dwarves who show up how does this all work for an oaken she'll do you think is the king [TS]

  under the mountain is dead. What happens to his companions. [TS]

  I know the answer because I read the book but I could not believe that they spend so much time on all of the fights [TS]

  and adding all this unnecessary stuff [TS]

  and then they just they just skip what happens that sure is how it was that they haven't even thought about that yet [TS]

  but you're right there was no kind of [TS]

  but also a big unresolved thing is you know at the start of the Lord Of The Rings movies which presumably is thirty [TS]

  years later or something. OK yeah something like that. Mike presumably we still live in a middle. [TS]

  Earth where there exists a mountain that is full to the brim of like gold like this is an amazing special. [TS]

  This is an amazing place. [TS]

  This is like the center of the universe [TS]

  and in the low to the reduced Maisie's it's not has it has the go to Spain distributive though. [TS]

  Well yeah but you're on this earth anyway. Another thing that bothers me is the issue of legalists. [TS]

  Oh my God Well now I can. [TS]

  Obviously the age thing is a problem because he clearly looks so much older [TS]

  and I kept every time he was on screen I kept thinking Get this forty year old man off off camera because of this then [TS]

  he pops up in The Lord Of The Rings movies is this kind of fresh faced handsome guy stuff [TS]

  but he looked he looked old in the in the in the first Hobbit movie [TS]

  and I swear he he is really going through that transition of just being an older grown up person. [TS]

  Yeah and he just he just looks. He looks laughable on screen. Let's put that aside for a minute though. [TS]

  I'll put that to one side for a minute you know because you know the guy's getting older [TS]

  and they want to keep the same actor you know. OK Let's let's say that's a mountable. [TS]

  Yes except for the fact that he's not mentioned at all in the original Hobbit movies [TS]

  and there's no reason to have him there. But yeah what I'm getting I guess goes like Orlando Bloom. [TS]

  But anyway find some other attractive elf dude like you who were not were not short of attractive humans in the world [TS]

  you can find another one. [TS]

  Let's put that to one side I didn't even realize that but let's let's put that to one side and say you had to have him. [TS]

  The other big problem is not his appearance. It's his change in personality. [TS]

  Because he's he's not just going from an old man to a young man in appearance. [TS]

  He's going from this boring in the in the prequels he's in the hole that he's this sort of boring serious guy you know [TS]

  this amazing stuff and then in the Lord Of The Rings he's found an exciting and fresh faced and like he clearly hasn't. [TS]

  Saying all the stuff he's saying in the hall [TS]

  but because like in the hope he's saying he's saying stuff that would just turn you into this like you know this kind [TS]

  of sad guy I guess and then he suddenly got rebooted. [TS]

  He's got a completely different personality that doesn't marry with what he's seen these before. [TS]

  Yeah it makes it makes no sense whatsoever his character arc that he's supposed to be that like young sort of [TS]

  rebellious elf in The Lord Of The Rings and he's supposed to be different and he sees the world slumberous man in it [TS]

  and then he pops up again and one of the rigs these yes to hang out with he's eighteen years old and he lots of fun. [TS]

  After seeing hundreds and hundreds of his comrades die you know not that long ago and the horrors of war [TS]

  and now he can't wait to write off again. It's doesn't make it doesn't make any sense. [TS]

  Now Orlando Bloom which is like this is a terrible terrible decision to have him in. [TS]

  Well I'm sorry to anyone who's listened to listen to this it doesn't say in the film one does not know let's be honest [TS]

  nobody listening to this who hasn't seen it is nobody's nobody's listening to far. [TS]

  Who hasn't seen the movie that they want to catharsis is there anything else we need to say there's a lot we could say [TS]

  but I think oh man I will look at them [TS]

  and do a couple of a couple of strange points at one point do the worms pop out of the ground [TS]

  and one points to remember the scene where everybody will actually look at my OK so they're pretty cool. [TS]

  They don't exist in the books but whatever that's fine. [TS]

  And then what do they do they just disappeared right as far as I could tell they popped out of the ground once to look [TS]

  scary and then what I never saw them get killed [TS]

  and I think I have read the whole because that's where all the soldiers I never saw them do anything right they just [TS]

  they just there on screen to look cool just to be another piece of crap on the screen [TS]

  and then nothing happens with them you know that was that was terrible. [TS]

  Yeah this is just so so many things but that one was one like why does why does this exist here. [TS]

  I have I have no idea it's a good thing. Other minor point that I think many moo. We suffer from. [TS]

  There's no sense of place at all. How far these places from each other. Where the hell is anybody compare and contrast. [TS]

  I think it's the two towers I don't exactly remember which Lord Of The Rings movie [TS]

  but they do this thing which I love because they can just barely pull it off. [TS]

  Where at one moment a bunch of characters just literally puts a map on the table and the camera focuses on the map [TS]

  and people point to different spots on the map and describe what's going on. [TS]

  They say Oh Sam [TS]

  and forces are coming from over here we're coming from over this way this is F R And I always love that in the movie [TS]

  because it's it's sort of awkward [TS]

  but it's also we need this right now I need to have an understanding of where the hell all these places are. [TS]

  Yeah and this movie has has no understanding of where anything is which makes everything just even more meaningless. [TS]

  Let me ask you this. [TS]

  To what extent has Peter Jackson done a George Lucas here [TS]

  and tarnished Tanishq himself I mean he hasn't he hasn't gone as far [TS]

  but has he done that has he has he undermined himself he went. That's an interesting question. [TS]

  As that it's a very interesting question. [TS]

  So I think I said in this podcast before [TS]

  but I actually kind of hope that at some point in the future there is a redone version of The Lord Of The Rings movies [TS]

  where they update the special effects. [TS]

  I don't know how possible that is [TS]

  but there are some shots in that movie where I thought you know what I would be OK with like a like a special edition [TS]

  version of these movies where they go back and try to clean up a bunch of stuff because there is. [TS]

  I always thought those movies were made just when they were technically possible [TS]

  but I would have loved it if those movies were delayed like a couple years because of the technology. [TS]

  But the Hobbit movies would almost make me worry about the same team ever going back and doing anything. [TS]

  And again you know I find it bad. [TS]

  Saying I don't know why these are so different you know I don't even if you even if they didn't want to make it into [TS]

  three movies as we discovered last time that it was supposed to be two [TS]

  and let's say the studio was forcing them to make it into three It does not. [TS]

  Even then the decisions don't make any sense about how the movies turned out about making them so long [TS]

  and so padded with stuff so I don't I don't know why you may have been pressuring for three movies [TS]

  but I wouldn't pressure for three long movies. Yeah like they don't they don't care how long it is. [TS]

  They want three points of sale and you know you could you know cut it cut the movies down in half [TS]

  and I think you could make something better. [TS]

  One of the things that I always kind of wondered in the year for the first movies was Peter Jackson kind of came out of [TS]

  nowhere and I always wondered what the story was with how the heck did this guy get hired because I look at his I.M.D.B. [TS]

  Profile back in the day about what has he done before the Lord Of The Rings [TS]

  and it seemed like it was almost nothing like a couple of very small projects [TS]

  and I always I was never able to find out the answer [TS]

  but I how did this guy end up getting selected for this enormous expensive incredibly important project [TS]

  and then he amazingly did just just a phenomenal phenomenal job. [TS]

  And that always seemed like a mystery to me and now I have another mystery of how did the same person [TS]

  and the same team of people around him produce something so terrible. [TS]

  So I feel like Peter Jackson is is a bit of a mystery to me I don't understand I don't understand where he came from I [TS]

  don't understand how he got originally selected and I don't understand how far how far he has fallen. [TS]

  Which is quite far. What do you think you think he's redeemed himself or I am baffled. [TS]

  I'm a bit baffled because he did he didn't arrive with a lot of the Rings and maybe maybe the writing was on the road. [TS]

  Maybe the warning signs were there in the Lord Of The Rings and make more than those battles names that. [TS]

  Just creeping on a bit too long and they're a bit too much [TS]

  and maybe we should have it live like it's like the hints in return of the jet I like the shape of things to come here [TS]

  and it's and it's like it's almost like maybe he has this in common with George Lucas maybe he didn't. [TS]

  Maybe the things we liked. [TS]

  He doesn't know what was good about it and he picked the wrong thing but he doesn't get why it worked and then [TS]

  when you try to do it again he he accentuated the wrong things he thought he thought we all love those battle scenes in [TS]

  his first three and it was more we tolerated them because all the other stuff was so good. [TS]

  Say he he doubled down to use one of your favorite signings on the wrong thing [TS]

  but a nice you know he hasn't he hasn't done his and a lot of other brilliant stuff. [TS]

  You know I'd be pretty happy with a little rings on the say they say he's still done better than me. [TS]

  Yeah yeah fair enough [TS]

  and then I will I always be always be grateful to him for the original three movies to finish with what we've been [TS]

  talking it's been so somber. I feel like and we we've been complaining for a long time. [TS]

  This may be our longest show ever. [TS]

  This is our hour the battle of the five armies but not a Christmas special bumper Christmas special [TS]

  or incredibly boring long podcast we will let the viewers decide. I mean a lot of this is already is over anyway. [TS]

  Go on really well and I don't know. [TS]

  Anyway I just thought it as a slightly slightly fun thing there has been a discussion on my red hat that is related to [TS]

  the Lord Of The Rings which I have enjoyed quite a great deal which is listeners may know by now that my Reddit user [TS]

  name is mind of metal and wheels [TS]

  and this has always been a Lord Of The Rings reference this is not a I am a robot reference [TS]

  but is from one of my my favorite lines in the ratings which is a comment where Treebeard is describe. [TS]

  Being sound man and he said and he says Oh Simon has a mind of metal and wheels [TS]

  and tree beard intends this as an insult but I always thought as a kid like that's a great line. [TS]

  A mind of metal on wheels that's amazing and so are you that is my Reddit user name [TS]

  and a whole bunch of people only to realize this after I put a lot of the Rings video because I had to work that line [TS]

  in at some point in the video and I did and I think the light bulb went off for a bunch of people [TS]

  but oh that's why the Reddit name is this. [TS]

  But so anyway this led to a little discussion about there are five Wizards the five is tiring [TS]

  and there are five guys who participated in the random acts of intelligence show [TS]

  and I think we're kind of known as a little group now [TS]

  and so there was a big discussion about which which random acts of intelligence dude is which of the five Wizards. [TS]

  So this is maybe Henry destine and from Derek from very Taseer Yes it is it is the five of us [TS]

  and it is a fun little discussion. [TS]

  I thought about who is which and it doesn't it doesn't work perfectly the characteristics don't line up. [TS]

  Absolutely great. [TS]

  But so I guess I am sorry man in this situation people are in quotes like I mean I don't understand it [TS]

  but I know the characters vaguely and I've seen no video [TS]

  but people have been pretty unanimous in their classifications I don't think there's a love I going to be done here [TS]

  people seem to agree on this. Agree on that and so there there is there is one slightly contentious point. [TS]

  Even I mean through the five hundred. [TS]

  Yeah OK Well the thing though mention about me with being sour man I think is appropriate because I have very often [TS]

  thought that were I to be tempted by the ring I would fold just immediately. [TS]

  Well you don't like objects you don't like objects that is true. [TS]

  Right but I am I am totally just aware that one of the ways of the Rings The ring is supposed to work if evil is. [TS]

  By tempting you with the power to do good. [TS]

  Like wouldn't things just be great if you were in charge right and you [TS]

  and you know you could you could start making things go your way [TS]

  and you could sort out all these problems if only you had more power [TS]

  and I would just be completely susceptible to that argument I would not be able to resist in the slightest [TS]

  and I would go from a normal dude to all shall love me and despair in a month. [TS]

  OK So beings our man is about appropriate and so then the question is are there the two blue Wizards [TS]

  and the consensus seems to be that that is Henry and Derek are the two blue with Yes And the question is for you [TS]

  and destine who is Radagast and who is Gandalf. [TS]

  This is yeah I mean I know a bit about those two characters and I may invest in it [TS]

  and as most people seem to have put me down as this. [TS]

  Radagast and I get the impression that's because of my caveman my caveman thing I think I'm a bit. [TS]

  You know and that Radagast character in the film he looks kind of caveman like cousin [TS]

  and he's kind of rough around the edges and yeah I think it's the nature connection there. [TS]

  Yeah and and obviously destiny is you know quite wise and smart and clever [TS]

  and kind of Gandalf is the wise was one that seems quiet [TS]

  but that seems like a no brainer to me I can't see how I can see how maybe people want to marry up to estimate about a [TS]

  guest because destines a man of nature but I can't see how you would marry me up with Gandalf. [TS]

  Gandalf is wise and clever and does good stuff and everyone likes him and that's not that's not quite my. My skills. [TS]

  Yeah I was I'm glad that you coming and I don't want to I don't want to put you down you know and in any way [TS]

  but being it being a Gandalf is is is quite quite the thing [TS]

  and I've got to say if I have to vote I'm putting destine down as yes. [TS]

  As Gandalf there I don't think I'm worthy of any of being and he said [TS]

  but if I have to be in the way we had one I'll take him. Well I would I would say I do not. [TS]

  I refuse to accept the movie betrayal of Radagast as anything to do with the actual character of Radagast so I am not I [TS]

  disavow the movie Radagast and accept only the book version of threat against which is almost entirely unknown [TS]

  but just a wizard who is involved with nature [TS]

  and does not does not get involved in all of these affairs about battles so I don't see I don't want to get oh OK with [TS]

  that. I'm not I'm not an outdoorsman but I do like their nature. Oh I didn't tell you my story. Oh yeah I am. [TS]

  I'm just rubbish at everything in life and life I just can't manage myself [TS]

  and not for example I went away to a cottage in the country saw this week with my sister and friends and family [TS]

  and I drove all the way back home after this week away and I realized I'd left my coat [TS]

  and credit card back in the cottage when the mike had to go all the way back and get it. [TS]

  So anyway I went and saw the film today and then left and went walking around the shops and just wandered aimlessly [TS]

  and then went back to the car park and went to pay for my parking and couldn't find my wallet [TS]

  and my wallet had fallen out of my pocket in the cinema. So such an adventure I went back to this. [TS]

  I went back to the cinema and talked a lot and then I had to go back into the center and get my phone as a torch [TS]

  and I was crawling could remember where I sat so I was crawling around under all the seats looking for my wallet [TS]

  and I found that I was more excited. [TS]