◼ ► Like when paper when we're not recalling these people ever hear my voice from a recording this is how I talk then [TS]
◼ ► There's only one or two there that are mysterious to us as to who we write them. So we should crack on. [TS]
◼ ► Yes I guess I guess we should OK you meet others I'll do the first one I don't think so that man thinks about some [TS]
◼ ► The very study that actually referenced last time that University of Utah study plus a bunch of other ones that people [TS]
◼ ► sent to me all confirm the same thing that basically listening to an audiobook on average is not super distracting. [TS]
◼ ► Apparently if you're Brady It is distracting because his wife says oh so with always these things you have to listen to [TS]
◼ ► but at least a distinctly speaking the average person is not in a great deal of danger if they're listening to an [TS]
◼ ► Did you read the whole thing like at the end of it say the study was brought to you by audible dot com. [TS]
◼ ► but I'm still going to put down my my guess as the theory that the no social obligation allows people to tune stuff out [TS]
◼ ► It is that that is just me totally guessing I have nothing to back that up except my gut feeling [TS]
◼ ► but you apparently are not allowed to listen to podcasts and audiobooks in the carburetor on the stove. [TS]
◼ ► but like I said my wife who was complaining about my driving say now OK so it's just a terrible driver that's that's [TS]
◼ ► and so I think it is pod cast as freight. Yes like it is free. Next item up quick little thing. [TS]
◼ ► We also asked last time is there any doctors in the audience to describe for us the knee reflex phenomenon which you [TS]
◼ ► There's something here in doctor's office when you were twenty five the first time you had the. [TS]
◼ ► Yes that's right you do if you do love as hard as nails thing you say it enough times people [TS]
◼ ► but I will loop it in many many times that people kind of that I have I have a feeling that that is definitely the case [TS]
◼ ► that this is not people that's what I don't get to hear about you being artisanal any doctors in the audience. [TS]
◼ ► Many doctors on Twitter many doctors via e-mail it is a neurological test they're doing so there is not the reflex that [TS]
◼ ► But apparently this is like was it the porridge in the three little bears it has to be just right. [TS]
◼ ► or if you have too much of a renew reflex they can indicate different neurological problems. [TS]
◼ ► but the thing would still work because we eat the way you could change it there if you could predict you could try [TS]
◼ ► and predict when you think you're going to get hit early so I think that might be obvious to the doctor if you. [TS]
◼ ► Start ticking before he actually hits you I think know better than I But if you time it so that you start you kick [TS]
◼ ► after the hit like you know I like racing drivers like just trying to get it just right on the changes a lot. [TS]
◼ ► but if nothing changes I think there's a but. But yes the only way it turns out that if it if you kick them. [TS]
◼ ► I mean look at the note that I have here so if you get if you kick too much it's a problem with your brain if you kick [TS]
◼ ► not enough it's a problem with your spine and the reflex stuff and many people pointed out the thing with reflexes. [TS]
◼ ► Also related to smashing coffee cups last time that is interesting is that it doesn't actually go to your brain which [TS]
◼ ► of course is why reflexes can be so automatic most of the time it's some if you throw something [TS]
◼ ► and back to prevent yourself from getting injured. So anyway reflexes super fast and that's the doctor one of four. [TS]
◼ ► Speaking of doctors in the audience Yes Can I just bring something up that wasn't in a notes so I just need to look for [TS]
◼ ► and legislators listening to hello internet had responded to something Gray said and some throw oil on them. [TS]
◼ ► and you know I know I know you should trust nothing on Reddit from someone saying Oh no lawmakers don't listen [TS]
◼ ► when I was here that this is how I would stand quite often with this thing to have the Internet in the cafeteria. [TS]
◼ ► and I can't find the original the original message which was on the original message of Cook's going to school [TS]
◼ ► but as I'm scrolling to try invited there's only there's only two things I'm scrolling past pictures of dogs [TS]
◼ ► and I had to work read it well enough to find the original. I'm following I think I can pull it up here. [TS]
◼ ► OK I've got it here let me let me reset Grace found that you read you read what this person wrote [TS]
◼ ► Well my message not to join the bandwagon of people complaining about Apple is going to go i Message been horrifically [TS]
◼ ► buggy for me on the phone on my computer it's very frustrating. I get the blank big lag big lag. [TS]
◼ ► No because under sitting here with a beach ball now my whole system's beach ball and I could've found it by now [TS]
◼ ► and summarize at the same time I couldn't even I couldn't even read the thing from the Dr I prepared to try to [TS]
◼ ► summarize this person said that they're working that the two of us in the Congress and I listen to the show [TS]
◼ ► and I said I thought you'd like to know that everything from Lulu to monkey copyright has been heard in a cafeteria. [TS]
◼ ► You make jokes about things but you do have listeners in places more than you could imagine etc Now if it was. [TS]
◼ ► and stuff I was like oh like probably like Stouffer's or maybe they're you know they work in the cafeteria [TS]
◼ ► and then this person replied basically saying that they're a congressperson like I'm like a member of the Congress. [TS]
◼ ► It is it is on the right it's I don't know how much you can trust us. Exactly so this is why I don't know what to do. [TS]
◼ ► Look it seems quite genuine but then I'm thinking red it's full of people who have silly delays and taken for sinus [TS]
◼ ► and you're a member of the Congress if you send a picture of yourself on the floor of Congress holding your i Phone [TS]
◼ ► or congresswoman who is listening to how the Internet and that would be that would be a little bit exciting. [TS]
◼ ► but you know this is a this is the fun of the Internet though you never know what's real what's not real what's you [TS]
◼ ► know it's like the whole internet is filled with just pranksters to maybe you know maybe it's not [TS]
◼ ► and then that will happen is we will going to find it and then will be convinced it's been photo shopped [TS]
◼ ► You can tell from the pixels if it's been Photo Shopped you say minutes like do you think it's possible as a member of [TS]
◼ ► I mean are you asking is it is it possible of course it's possible of course it's like technically possible that isn't [TS]
◼ ► Yes Well it is but you know what I mean I really within the realm of possibility it's possible that the. [TS]
◼ ► Listen to how it went today that it's he has it on his i Phone so that overcast sentiment announcements the instant [TS]
◼ ► though the new show is there and he listens right away. That's entirely possible I don't think it's very likely. [TS]
◼ ► You you have just these grandiose vision of how far your work in all its forms reaches I think this is very interesting. [TS]
◼ ► I assure you I don't I think you have celebrity issues that's I assure you I do I show you that no celebrities [TS]
◼ ► Can we move on now to the White House followup slaking of the president so it can if you can click the link that is in [TS]
◼ ► Someone on the Reddit pointed out with something I did not know that the resolute desk is not the only White House task [TS]
◼ ► but I was interested to discover that there are six desks that have been used by presidents in the Oval Office [TS]
◼ ► I mean he has a list of all the different desks and yes the resolute desk is the one that's used most recently [TS]
◼ ► and the C. and O. Desk was used at least I was just used by George H.W. Bush. Nobody's used it since then. [TS]
◼ ► Desk but as the resolute desk there's the Wilson desk at the Johnson desk and there is the Teddy Roosevelt desk [TS]
◼ ► Yeah I have to say I do I said of the last forecast that I like you know I like my White House trivia since sort of [TS]
◼ ► but I have a lot I have a lot of Wikipedia rabbit holes to go down over the next few weeks before I can. [TS]
◼ ► and like a lot of the Oval Office fire the first of office constructed in one nine hundred nine rebuilt after one [TS]
◼ ► and demolished one nine hundred thirty three current oval office completed in one nine hundred thirty four. [TS]
◼ ► See that picture of the Theodore Roosevelt desk in the Taft Oval Office. Yes Gosh that Oval Office doesn't. [TS]
◼ ► It's pretty crappy doesn't it looks it looks like a very powerful grandma's office I think is the way I would describe [TS]
◼ ► or something you know it looks very grandmotherly builder doesn't just drawers everywhere doesn't keep in those drawers [TS]
◼ ► that's I would like to know. Yes we put these pod cast play next episode Hello into them. Yes that's exactly right. [TS]
◼ ► That's leisure to realize of course. Anyway we'll put that link in the show and so other people. [TS]
◼ ► Just to put themselves out of their misery of listening to this say I have one final point about this. [TS]
◼ ► Yeah which I was relieved to see this because I thought Oh if I ever do find myself as president I can just get my own [TS]
◼ ► desk right then and there can be the great desk that future presidents will all want to use because it's awesome [TS]
◼ ► but I don't have to use you know the traditional president's desk it looks like if you want to you can just you can [TS]
◼ ► Bush did so what would the greatest health that you know could have any special features that the others don't have. [TS]
◼ ► Can you describe what the gray desk would be like your dream your fantasy desk What's your fantasy desk look like. [TS]
◼ ► I know now that I don't want any drawers of the desk I'm sitting at right now doesn't have any drawers [TS]
◼ ► when he drives for. Where do you put like pens and and have. Clips paper what papers do I have to clip in this office. [TS]
◼ ► Where do you put your own i Phones that I have a like a electronics drawer that my wife and I have in the bedroom [TS]
◼ ► Like if I'm the president do I need to keep my old i Phone five I need to have this juncture [TS]
◼ ► or in my office at all times now of course not. Where do you put your ISP a case I don't I don't have any U.S.B. [TS]
◼ ► Where do you put your local post where you can ask me just about every office supply you can possibly look into my [TS]
◼ ► driveway before you double a chase where do you put I don't know you text implying I have neither posted notes [TS]
◼ ► What are you doing with three decks of playing cards in your office within arm's reach none the less. [TS]
◼ ► What is the circumstance where you're sitting there thinking you know what I need not one not two [TS]
◼ ► but three decks of playing cards and I need them so acceptable and I have to stand up to get them into number five [TS]
◼ ► OK so say no draws in the fantasy desk so it's just basically a plank of wood between two like Trestles. [TS]
◼ ► Yes I think sitting at the desk I'm sitting at right now is just flat surface. No drawers it goes down. [TS]
◼ ► I would also want to be able to be a standing desk which is something I'm looking into for my current office now that I [TS]
◼ ► and that is something I would like to get at some point so I could I could have I could have the very first [TS]
◼ ► Now be good little treadmill underneath that I don't think you really buy into this kind of traditional fin thickness [TS]
◼ ► but this is everything becomes traditional telling you future presidents that they would say was a standing desk with a [TS]
◼ ► treadmill is awesome and they'd start using it and then in a hundred years it be traditional. [TS]
◼ ► and things like that I like that thing where you can put your secret maps you know where do I keep my secret maps now I [TS]
◼ ► don't even know that it's somewhere in the house I guess you probably don't even have secret maps other than that I [TS]
◼ ► I don't think I don't think I have going to the design suggestion of your fantasy desk it involves microphone placement [TS]
◼ ► you know that could be but I need something coming down from the ceiling maybe for the net for that [TS]
◼ ► and then to the next place. Anyway if you became president would we keep doing the podcast. [TS]
◼ ► Like you know that the Orson there it's all it's all about opportunity cost you know everything is in relation to every [TS]
◼ ► Would you still be willing to do the podcast with me if I was present Yeah I would be also had even more fun because [TS]
◼ ► Yes Then you could ask me about things that I've broken in though in the Oval Office to hear if you wanted to ask the [TS]
◼ ► and I think if he became president he probably does snuff me if I became I mean again I would certainly just resign [TS]
◼ ► immediately if I found myself as present for some reason I forget this is a terrible job anyway [TS]
◼ ► when I saw McDonald's in the show next to the one you want describe what this is because this screams to me Brady Haran. [TS]
◼ ► It's this website called Hack of the many men in this link to the secret McDonald's menu and you click on it [TS]
◼ ► and it's just got this list of things you can buy McDonald's that you don't know about life because and things [TS]
◼ ► and they also a lot of them seem like sort of extreme things that you would do that you'd see on like you know those [TS]
◼ ► But I really I think some of them aren't real I would like to issue a child's listeners So what what what I'm looking [TS]
◼ ► at right now is a picture of something called the mic at ten thirty five which apparently is a brunch sandwich item [TS]
◼ ► that McDonald's makes during their brief changeover window from the breakfast menu to the lunch menu [TS]
◼ ► and it basically looks like an Egg McMuffin that is also with two additional patties of beef [TS]
◼ ► and cheese in between every layer and I say it's the most difficult to kind of on the secret menu. [TS]
◼ ► Yes and it looks both revolting and delicious. Take my initial reaction was that horrifying and then I found it. [TS]
◼ ► but just as as moments ago we have called for Congressman to send us photographs of them listening to hello internet on [TS]
◼ ► Yeah I was well I would love on Twitter if people can send us if they are able to acquire if it is real if they are [TS]
◼ ► able to acquire a mic. Ten thirty five and send us a picture of them eating it and listening to hello internet. [TS]
◼ ► I think some of these are just because it was one he called them a gang bang which I didn't think could be Rio [TS]
◼ ► and then I clicked on it and it basically says although you know this one and this one and put them together. [TS]
◼ ► Yeah that's just different there but there are there are restaurants that genuinely do the secret menu thing [TS]
◼ ► but the sizes are it's the small is a tall I can't I can't I can't do this because it's tall. [TS]
◼ ► but in America you can get a disgustingly large trend which is even bigger than the venti like thirty eight fluid [TS]
◼ ► but Starbucks has a secret item which is called the short which is about half the size of the TAL which makes the name [TS]
◼ ► But if you know that they have a smaller one that is called the short and then there's the tall [TS]
◼ ► and then there's the granddaddy invent venti that makes a lot more sense. That makes way more sense. [TS]
◼ ► and said Oh no no this guy he did the secret handshake you know and he winked at me come out the back. [TS]
◼ ► but so I would not disbelieve the notion that a person could get a make ten thirty five and I want to see. [TS]
◼ ► I'm excited to tell you today that we have a new sponsor a company that I rely on hover dot com hover is the best way [TS]
◼ ► They take all of the hassle out of registering domain names within five minutes you can pick a name get it registered [TS]
◼ ► have the whole thing up and running their website and the whole process is just clean and simple. [TS]
◼ ► I've tried a lot of domain name registers most of them aren't terrible and horrible to work with [TS]
◼ ► and there are companies that you don't even want to do business with. Cover is just the best by miles. [TS]
◼ ► when you go to register your domain name they don't try to up sell you on a whole bunch of other services that you don't [TS]
◼ ► need which is something I definitely see with other companies who try to sell you a whole bunch of bells [TS]
◼ ► and whistles that are just irrelevant with hover is I know you just getting a domain name. That's the end of it. [TS]
◼ ► The second thing that I love is that the stuff that should just come with the Web site. Like who is privacy. [TS]
◼ ► when you go to buy one you have to put in a whole bunch of information that's required by law including your name [TS]
◼ ► Now if say you don't want your name in your address public on the whole internet for anybody who looks at that website [TS]
◼ ► So how much do I like hover I like them enough to have a thirty four domain names registered there. [TS]
◼ ► but every time I get some crazy idea for some web site like save the Union Jack dot com which we mentioned on a [TS]
◼ ► and e-mail support which is what I have used on the occasions I've had to ask them questions and it's been very good. [TS]
◼ ► and they like to do things with the promo codes that you use so if you're going to register a domain name go to hover [TS]
◼ ► But and this is the promo code they're making me say you have to use freebooting at checkout. Yes that's right. [TS]
◼ ► The promo code to get ten percent off is free booting. It's not another word that I might want it to be. [TS]
◼ ► But you know that that's over now that's done. So rebooting is what it's going to be ten percent off at hover. [TS]
◼ ► And don't forget to use the promo code freebooting. So speaking of coffee. Yeah we have to follow up on a few. [TS]
◼ ► This was no this was this was I blame myself for this and I will explain myself if the opportunity arises [TS]
◼ ► but it all centered around the fact you were microwaving your coffee in the morning when things went wrong. [TS]
◼ ► and wished you the best with your injury more people will want to know what the heck you were doing. [TS]
◼ ► Microwaving coffee. Like someone who loves coffee as much as you purport. Why would you microwave coffee. [TS]
◼ ► That seems a very sort of uncouth way to make your coffee and I have to say I probably would have asked you about it [TS]
◼ ► but I part of the thing was I didn't actually process that you were microwaving the whole coffee I just ashamed that [TS]
◼ ► was how you boil your water or something like that but it seems you actually microwaving the whole coffee [TS]
◼ ► I don't understand why this is such a shock but I bet I got a boy did I hear about it from people about the coffee [TS]
◼ ► Do you want to hear something even something interesting in my entire life I've never had a cup of coffee. [TS]
◼ ► Well I've never had a coffee in my life really and even I think it's crazy that you microwave your coffee. [TS]
◼ ► You've never had a cup of coffee. None not ever know I have a one up or how how is this how is this come to pass. [TS]
◼ ► OK but if you've tasted it and I've touched it to my tongue just to be sure that the taste is as bad as the smell [TS]
◼ ► and I just you know I I really like if someone is in my car with a coffee I quite dislike that [TS]
◼ ► Yeah I do know I can I think you have some kind of biological aversion to coffee then because you almost everyone I [TS]
◼ ► Which even coffee people will agree on the coffee smells better than it is but you don't think it's all good at all. [TS]
◼ ► Well not unlike the smell I get but what I do I do appreciate that people love it and I love [TS]
◼ ► and I like that people take it really seriously and get connoisseur about it and I really respect that and I can [TS]
◼ ► I wish I liked coffee because I love the idea of having a coffee in the morning and but I just dislike it too much [TS]
◼ ► but I feel like this is really sad for you but your whole morning experience is greatly diminished. [TS]
◼ ► but just like someone told me that that flowers smell terrible to them just all flowers I would think oh that's that's [TS]
◼ ► If we let you go through your life missing out on all these cool things I'll go without my coffee. [TS]
◼ ► And one thing I know is that a good cup of coffee is not made in the microwave. Let's back up here. [TS]
◼ ► There was some confusion with the way I was telling the story where Sylvia should begin the beginning how I came across [TS]
◼ ► OK This story starts with the woman who would become my wife who's now my wife who is a total drug pusher [TS]
◼ ► and coffee bean industries because she pushes coffee on absolutely everyone she comes in contact who doesn't already [TS]
◼ ► I don't really drink coffee and this is this is before I was in the professional world working as a teacher [TS]
◼ ► and you know any of this is just an idiot you know hanging out in life not really doing anything in particular [TS]
◼ ► and she was starting her Oh you need do you need to get on coffee thing here and I was opposed to it I like the smell. [TS]
◼ ► but she used what is the gateway drug for very many people to getting into coffee which is Starbucks Frappuccino those [TS]
◼ ► which are basically ice cream shakes there's a Starbucks that is in the Luxor Hotel which was where we were staying the [TS]
◼ ► And from this is my of my wife kind of got me hooked on those and then eventually transitioned me into coffee [TS]
◼ ► and I'm I'm in a new phase now I want to like lattes for a while I did drink instant coffee [TS]
◼ ► when I was a teacher which people find absolutely horrifying. But you gotta do what you gotta do. [TS]
◼ ► You need coffee all day long and need it right away and you can't possibly have like roasting stuff in a school. [TS]
◼ ► But yes I drank lattes and now I am drinking actual coffee coffee though. If we go into our kitchen. [TS]
◼ ► or five pieces of equipment that are related to coffee production that are there. So we have a drip coffee pot. [TS]
◼ ► My wife also has one of those machines that has the little capsules that you put the capsule in [TS]
◼ ► I can remember people will now. They always make me think I have forseen Robocop too. I believe not. [TS]
◼ ► and every time I see the little coffee capsule something about it reminds me of the new drug that everybody is buying [TS]
◼ ► Anyway to add to your moving list because we have a whole lot like all this coffee paraphernalia [TS]
◼ ► She introduces each piece very slowly because she knows I need to adapt over long periods of time when joking [TS]
◼ ► when you said you're going to start at the very beginning right at the end of editing as well [TS]
◼ ► but don't you think you'll be laughing I'm sure all these filthy connoisseurs of the gang know you stole it was the [TS]
◼ ► But yes so now a lot of times I make coffee I find myself in the position that we have these this like vacuum container [TS]
◼ ► for the beans and then I put it through the burr grinder and particularly the burr grinder because it's really loud [TS]
◼ ► and I feel like first thing in like at six in the morning I'm trying to make a cup of coffee I can't deal with the burr [TS]
◼ ► grinder that early but apparently now I have to use it for making coffee and the coffee machine [TS]
◼ ► when the hen story occurred last time this is where people do get slightly horrified that we've got I've gone through [TS]
◼ ► and then I was coming to a pot of coffee that was sitting there that I need to heat up because it had just been sitting [TS]
◼ ► there for a while so you could've just said I was really hating nice coffee in the microwave. [TS]
◼ ► You probably didn't need the lox or part of the story that all of us all of the story it was absolutely necessary [TS]
◼ ► and if I don't I love the data here I think do you think that will cut out all of us who doesn't think What if I want [TS]
◼ ► to I want people to know how hard you went. Story I don't want people to think and you just glossed over mystical. [TS]
◼ ► I also feel that the length of that story was proportional to the number of emails I received horrify people worried [TS]
◼ ► There's another other point to this which is that for me coffee is a very important part of my work flow [TS]
◼ ► I have resisted becoming a very fussy coffee person I don't want to get too fussy about the coffees because I feel I [TS]
◼ ► and so I have a threshold which is basically Starbucks filtered coffee I need to be able to drink that [TS]
◼ ► and I can't get fussy to the point where I become one of these people who won't drink Starbucks filter coffee. [TS]
◼ ► So I intentionally kind of don't get super into coffee even though people might think I would be the kind of person who [TS]
◼ ► and I'll bet you're all about kind of you know redundancies and safety and mechanisms and things [TS]
◼ ► and making yourself dependant on a drug seems to go against the C G P guy I know who would know who would never want [TS]
◼ ► and you know you know what you're like you know you don't want to blow ya mind and on one platform [TS]
◼ ► or one thing in this and one thing and here you are just making yourself a slave to this drink. You can't work there. [TS]
◼ ► Yes this is true I agree that is that the inferi me but everybody has vices. This is this is my vice. [TS]
◼ ► but I totally acknowledge that in a perfect world I wouldn't be drinking coffee but I just really like it [TS]
◼ ► and I just think it also makes the whole work routine just kind of nicer in a way that that's hard to quantify. [TS]
◼ ► and a day of mourning where something goes wrong with the coffee production is really bad I mean luckily by the time [TS]
◼ ► that that coffee story occurred from last time I had already ingested you know one cup of coffee so things were great [TS]
◼ ► but it would have really been a disastrous day if that was opposed to my first cup of coffee [TS]
◼ ► and then I had to go to the hospital without any. I probably would've stopped at Starbucks on my way. [TS]
◼ ► Actually I'm pretty sure I would have done that I would've stopped at Starbucks on the way it was [TS]
◼ ► and hold a Starbucks in one hand as I tell the doctor that I burn my other hand with coffee that's all I would have [TS]
◼ ► When you tell the doctor what happened you know I just sort of superheating thing what did they say by the way they [TS]
◼ ► or you really should be more careful now they do just seem totally nonplussed like this happens all the time you know I [TS]
◼ ► mean this is the way it does is the way it is with doctors that we've been there a couple times before with relatively [TS]
◼ ► or whatever you know the year my third and is not yet lunch but that's what that was like for doctors to do anyway. [TS]
◼ ► Coffee in need to be able to drink it anywhere in the world I don't want to get too fussy about it. [TS]
◼ ► But unfortunately I do recognize how good good coffee can be which is something I kind of tried to avoid for a while [TS]
◼ ► We were Kona coffee can definitely taste the difference especially now I don't drink coffee with sugar in it [TS]
◼ ► and I think we are getting a little too close to being a coffee snob because to have the good stuff. Yeah yeah. [TS]
◼ ► when a follow up item involves you telling the story of how your wife introduced you to coffee you know we're in [TS]
◼ ► and now we have to you know we have to do if we have to eventually get the You Tube thing which you teased last time [TS]
◼ ► and so now we have to like rush through stuff because we're chained to that because of you saying we're going to do it [TS]
◼ ► We tell people we were going to review black marijuana episode and then we just didn't we didn't want to have to. [TS]
◼ ► People were angry people didn't like it I didn't get I didn't hear a lot of anger on that one. [TS]
◼ ► When people are expecting something so it will skip over that little skip over one what this next thing very minor OK [TS]
◼ ► Yeah I have a plane crash corner you can see plane crash cause I am doing plane crash corner. That's my thing. [TS]
◼ ► Come up with the one point I found something for plane crash corner and I want to bring it up. [TS]
◼ ► Yes I thought you'd be excited and disappointed OK fine we won't do plane crash corner now. [TS]
◼ ► Come on give me what you find. No I know I know I thought you'd be really happy and you're not really happy. [TS]
◼ ► Although I did say we were going to do a plane crash going this way because we went so hard last week that I felt bad [TS]
◼ ► You made my wife all nervous you know we have we have some flights coming up shouldn't listen to the plane crash corner. [TS]
◼ ► If you're a bad part of me feels a little bit warm that your wife was listening to plane crash going to it's like I'm [TS]
◼ ► sharing the love. Yeah she listens to the podcast. She was listening to it literally right before I was recording this. [TS]
◼ ► Oh you should listen to part of the podcast we talked about that she's like you know and then I fly [TS]
◼ ► Yes she gets she feels the opposite the too far apart and she gets on my case keeps going to going to make an episode. [TS]
◼ ► She's really she really wants them so she can talk to you any time she wants she can she can do a hello internet live [TS]
◼ ► but she also as we were just discussing before I go on the microphone now she often finds herself sympathizing with [TS]
◼ ► or has sympathy for listening to you sometimes deal with me in particularly like oh yeah I know where it is really [TS]
◼ ► Gray's plane crash going to have any no no this is this is this is just follow the plane crash corner is still yours. [TS]
◼ ► My plane crash corner this is probably the only time we might see this park has for a hundred years [TS]
◼ ► and now where you've been holding this back tell you this is like a little Christmas present. [TS]
◼ ► Yeah it kind of is not really it this is the kind of plane crash corner that I would send you [TS]
◼ ► and we can fix this now it will come to my computer but like in about five minutes to sum up for I K. [TS]
◼ ► Well I've got to push if you have sent me a posher Yes this is my plane crash corner is this pie chart which seems to [TS]
◼ ► and the thing I think is really interesting about this is the two Malaysian Airline flights which you have spoken about [TS]
◼ ► Those two flights made up forty four percent of all of the plane crash fatalities in all of twenty four teams. [TS]
◼ ► Well that just justifies the amount of time I gave Mom plane crash going to does it I'm not sure that it does. [TS]
◼ ► However I don't even want to do it this way you can you're doing it so I don't know what you're talking about [TS]
◼ ► but I'm I'm bringing it up because I feel like this is this pie chart is a nice a nice reminder [TS]
◼ ► and visual reminder of how unsafe airline travel actually is that by the way that thing just came through on my [TS]
◼ ► If we don't have to pay you a professional I want you know people should know how this podcast unfolds there's not [TS]
◼ ► Also know if we have any if we have any problems with the perception of this park as it is it is too professional if [TS]
◼ ► when you really struggle like we have to insert all these problems falsely Otherwise we are just too damn professional. [TS]
◼ ► but the rest of it is because it's a bit like eleven hundred twelve hundred feet Televisa over the course of twenty [TS]
◼ ► when people listen to this podcast I will have been on three long haul flights so it's not like I'm you know cowering [TS]
◼ ► and reassure myself for the flights that I have planned in the future is a right thing travel relatively safe. [TS]
◼ ► Yet if I if one of those planes crashes and I don't come out the other side. Right. We used to put this podcast up. [TS]
◼ ► Oh yeah yeah you know well I mean now that you've said this I'm not sure I want you to do I mean enough of this up in [TS]
◼ ► What's our policy on the podcast if one of us dies when you mean what would he mean with what are we discussing here. [TS]
◼ ► Your listeners aren't aware we're recording is what like two days after we put up the other one. [TS]
◼ ► Yes all over the world so we need to have like an agreement in place if one of us does what happens with the podcast [TS]
◼ ► Now another of Korea hijack I could I could put out a last recording because you've got such a cult following [TS]
◼ ► but that could actually be worth something couldn't grace your Grace tragic last recording to have a cult following. [TS]
◼ ► OK look if you sell it you have to give my share of the proceeds to my wife if I died and I care and if my wife [TS]
◼ ► and I think that's pushing it a bit I think if you've both gone I can probably get the praise AIDS I think about your [TS]
◼ ► OK I guess I did like the sound your parents because I like may say I'll give them your half right. [TS]
◼ ► Right but it never really occurred to me but if you had if you die between or between the packets must go up or not. [TS]
◼ ► You don't want me to put up is that what you tell me is that what you're saying you don't want your final word Actually [TS]
◼ ► and now that we're discussing it seem have the very fact that we're discussing it is the reason that it should go up. [TS]
◼ ► Like how creepy will this be. People be so creeped out. What do you think that's a good that's not a good thing. [TS]
◼ ► and I think yeah let's not let's not let's not talk about the fact that you're going to die at some point for the [TS]
◼ ► people because you know this is this moment right now we're alive the recording it won't be someday someone might be [TS]
◼ ► listening. P.-P. Future people and we are going to put it up if you die on the plane. That's fine it's all good. [TS]
◼ ► and has over three thousand courses on topics like web development photography visual design business [TS]
◼ ► and of course software trading on things like XO Wordpress Photoshop you name it Linda. Probably got up. [TS]
◼ ► Now you can sign on for a free ten day trial today. Go to Lynda dot com slash hello internet. [TS]
◼ ► My first experience with Linda was actually sitting next to a friend at an ad agency in London [TS]
◼ ► I think that's one of the really useful things about Linda you might not hear so often that ability just to get those [TS]
◼ ► Lynda dot com slash hello internet and go for a binge on knowledge taking as much as you can [TS]
◼ ► and if you like them I think there's a chance you will you can of course then sign on for longer. [TS]
◼ ► Since we recorded right here you will have released the latest Internet animated by a friend of ski jump [TS]
◼ ► and I've never said the reason I bring this up is for people who have never seen these things as animated Codell ski's [TS]
◼ ► very clever and he takes one or two little sections of the pod cast and creates these animations to them [TS]
◼ ► and I think five of them are already on our You Tube channel on the hello internet You Tube channel [TS]
◼ ► and now there will be a six one which is his longest comes and I had a bumper two minutes and it is the longest [TS]
◼ ► They're definitely worth a look because Haiti certainly puts things in a new context and and they're good fun. [TS]
◼ ► People talk about the podcast it's always the same that people say Oh I listen to podcasts I really like it [TS]
◼ ► It's very I mean we have the joke that we dominate the two dudes talking category that does not actually exist [TS]
◼ ► but it is very hard to say to another person why they might want to listen to this pod cast because it doesn't it [TS]
◼ ► when people try to introduce somebody else to the pod cast of those dusky animations are probably the best way to do it [TS]
◼ ► and think like oh I like this little animation maybe I'll listen to the whole thing so I think there's like there like [TS]
◼ ► a nice little movie trailer you know maybe maybe for movie that's boring or and in a different kind of tone [TS]
◼ ► You're so you're saying it's more like oh it's a way of tricking people into listening by promising them that's one [TS]
◼ ► and he makes us look mildly funny which is quite an achievement. So yeah now you know we're not funny at all. [TS]
◼ ► We've been talking about our own mortality for the last twenty years basically So the last two days for me have [TS]
◼ ► I thought I'd tell people a bit about what happens just because not only because nothing else to talk about [TS]
◼ ► Now it's going to come across as a bit of a humble brag at times just before you all start giving me hash tag humble [TS]
◼ ► Well anyway we released a small number of tickets for this event we've been talking about for a month [TS]
◼ ► or two now where people can come and watch Star Wars. Bristow's who is me and David Prowse who played in Star Wars. [TS]
◼ ► I bid and won in an auction on the rights to watch Star Wars with David Prowse at a charity event a few months back. [TS]
◼ ► And it was supposed to just be for me and a handful of friends that I spoke to there and I spoke to David [TS]
◼ ► and said Can we turn it into this hello internet thing they both agreed because it was a chance to raise more money for [TS]
◼ ► but it was still going to be a very small event and it still is going to be a very small event [TS]
◼ ► and this is what has caused problems because for a while I was going to say for reasons unknown not for reasons unknown. [TS]
◼ ► It turns out I didn't realize just how many people wanted to come until a couple of days ago. [TS]
◼ ► So basically at midday on a Tuesday we released an e-mail address a secret e-mail address to our patriotic supporters [TS]
◼ ► and the idea was then the next day on the Wednesday we would release another secret e-mail address to everyone to get [TS]
◼ ► the other half of the tickets. We thought and I still think it was probably the best way we could do it. [TS]
◼ ► So midday you posted the email address on the Patriot because you know you have the control over that and within. [TS]
◼ ► But people obviously had the email already written with all the things they had to write that was the impressive part [TS]
◼ ► People were preparing in advance for this and as soon as I had the address I press the button so I had their name [TS]
◼ ► So there were people who had like on the Tuesday there were people who had a mild you know instantaneously within five [TS]
◼ ► He sent me a message saying no e-mails yet and then not ten seconds later you sent saying we're sold out. [TS]
◼ ► It felt like we were selling W W D C ticket there's something rotten apple puts up the tickets [TS]
◼ ► Yeah but anyway it just seemed it seemed a crazy short amount of time I mean we were released. [TS]
◼ ► and we did to the point where we even got like official the official you know nuclear clock out to make sure it went up [TS]
◼ ► but you can have a go in the public you know for the other half an hour and they went even quicker. [TS]
◼ ► Like if you think if you think those first ones went quickly should I say the second one it was like everyone piled on [TS]
◼ ► and say we've allocated over the we've allocated more tickets than we were supposed to already so. [TS]
◼ ► If I had been handling this thing I would have handled it more by the book but you are Mister Softee [TS]
◼ ► and we have we have distributed more tickets and we were thinking originally Doug was not soft. [TS]
◼ ► I was well yeah well I didn't follow rules I just want everyone to know that I had that I had a strict rule that I did [TS]
◼ ► have a strict rule in my head my rule was just softer than your oh so it's not like I've done anyone favors [TS]
◼ ► and I did follow the row and if you missed that you missed out because you know. There was no favoritism. [TS]
◼ ► We had a couple of friends and people we know who wanted tickets and they you know they were treated the same [TS]
◼ ► and so there was no there was no like unfairness but I just I just I want to allocate a few more tickets than you did. [TS]
◼ ► So yeah the reason I'm saying you're Mister Softee is we had a notion of how many tickets we were going to have [TS]
◼ ► and then you felt really bad because there were a bunch of people with puppy dog eyes in your mind staring at you [TS]
◼ ► and why they say they will move to the line as to how many tickets which are which in reality only only meant if your [TS]
◼ ► but it is also partly why the thing you want to talk about now just fair to say that we vastly underestimated the [TS]
◼ ► demand for the event I think and so where were they. We're recording this. It's Wednesday right. [TS]
◼ ► So the second round of take it from our perspective just went out today even though you dear listener are hearing this [TS]
◼ ► well into the future. So yes we are trying to figure out something to do to maybe make the event slightly bigger. [TS]
◼ ► Very slight So we have pretty much the problem is the room we're watching Star Wars India has like a maximum [TS]
◼ ► and we're pretty much we're nearly there you know we have we can squeeze a few more people in we think so how many [TS]
◼ ► tickets have you allocated at this point just people know we're actually talking about here. [TS]
◼ ► I have allocated thirty OK to get this right but it actually went just over thirty because what I did was black. [TS]
◼ ► First but ended up being fifteen and fifteen right because Mr Softee because I'm Mr Softee right. [TS]
◼ ► If if I had allocated if fourteen had gone and the next e-mail came in from someone saying Can I have two or three. [TS]
◼ ► OK so so so what we're thinking of is trying to see if we can because so many people wanted to come [TS]
◼ ► or something with the zoo so we can have some more but the idea was always for it to be quite small intimate as well. [TS]
◼ ► Yes And and in fairness to David Prowse like you know he had just agreed to me and a few friends. [TS]
◼ ► or anything no no that's that's not what's going to happen with you know a handful more tickets at most if we can. [TS]
◼ ► but so now we know at this moment we don't do that you know we're going to do we're not going to do that e-mail thing [TS]
◼ ► against because that was really pro life now it was that was cool for me to watch it all my life I got my wife to come [TS]
◼ ► into that mid day because she just happened to be walking past an office and I said What is this. [TS]
◼ ► And like when she came and stood next to me and I put the e-mail address on the blog and she [TS]
◼ ► Mail page and I went and it was incredibly impressed by them. She didn't know she was not impressed. [TS]
◼ ► She saw it was like she said it was really cruel as well because you know I know exactly what that's like. [TS]
◼ ► and eight telephones trying to like you know buy tickets for the Glastonbury Music Festival in the sort of fifteen [TS]
◼ ► and I feel really bad for people who missed out and that's just unfortunate that has had to happen. [TS]
◼ ► Yes well you feel very badly about this but how I feel is that there is a market failure here. [TS]
◼ ► And so what we have is very high demand for a very small event that is also very difficult to price correctly. [TS]
◼ ► Yeah this to me screams auction right. This is like what an auction is made for. I don't know what the price should be. [TS]
◼ ► And you obviously have way more people who want to show up than can possibly show up the best way to deal with this is [TS]
◼ ► and because I would about like some you know I already had university students e-mailing me saying it was too expensive [TS]
◼ ► We don't I don't say which I don't think was very expensive by the way because you know just buying David Prowse [TS]
◼ ► autograph gets near that on the signs. Well this is also that we are doing this for a charity event. [TS]
◼ ► but then the poor Penguins would be looking at you with their big puppy dog eyes chewing on chewing on a fish bone [TS]
◼ ► and then I'm going to complain I would have to do send you photos of sad looking parents if you gave away all the [TS]
◼ ► There's going to be an option for the for the remaining tickets if you are just I think we're not at this one we're not [TS]
◼ ► one hundred percent sure that's what the case is a case like check that description things might have changed [TS]
◼ ► but the very least I would like to set this up as an option here because I think then that this is only a few tickets [TS]
◼ ► left and then this also gives us the opportunity to raise more money for the zoo instead of less money for the zoo and. [TS]
◼ ► You're like a crazy person who super loves Darth Vader. Hello Internet and penguins and you're rich. [TS]
◼ ► Like you can you know maybe spend a whole bunch of money on this event and be really happy. [TS]
◼ ► Yes yes we did have you were telling me we actually had people trying to come from abroad is I think some of the [TS]
◼ ► That's crazy but there were people like I think there was Korea and the United States and Canada [TS]
◼ ► and I was like look because I don't know where they're from but I was looking at their phone numbers [TS]
◼ ► and then getting an e-mail saying well you're not coming because you can't have a ticket to the very first come first [TS]
◼ ► But this is this is what auctions are not as good for you I mean I think you get irritated because you have sometimes [TS]
◼ ► asked me questions for solutions to various problems that are along the line I'm always like auction auctions always [TS]
◼ ► And you know I'm always surprised the places that sell tickets don't do that way more often of having some portion of [TS]
◼ ► when this that's what I show on the site you know I'm not I'm not opposed to auctioning things [TS]
◼ ► and anyway it has caused me more distress initiative over the last couple days and you have pain. [TS]
◼ ► You have been a slab of granite for me to cry on. As usual I think I have been exactly as comforting as a slab. [TS]
◼ ► You know tears are rolling down the surface of my cold skin. But I'm just thinking sounds like an auction. [TS]
◼ ► That's what this sounds like so if you do the mile you will get an e-mail about how we're going to take it [TS]
◼ ► and even if you didn't know the mouth I guess you can still go on the auction because we can't keep the auction secret [TS]
◼ ► and look forward to seeing people there on May the ninth not May the fourth I know you may the fourth a Star Wars Day [TS]
◼ ► and so you don't need to aim I mean so he should have done it before I'm not a fan of the May the fourth thing I think [TS]
◼ ► Yeah I mean no disrespect was the prequels but this was. That's an interesting choice of words to go for there. [TS]
◼ ► May the fourth is disrespectful to the Star Wars movie making a pun about something especially as the night May the [TS]
◼ ► Force be with you know which is this you know iconic important thing is a good film made a fool to do this week that's [TS]
◼ ► Yeah I'm not a fan of the puns Anyway good luck in the auction people speaking of magnificent cultural milestones I do [TS]
◼ ► love my Segway like a Segway anything. Yeah yeah you put something in the show next about that great T.V. [TS]
◼ ► Tell me this thing about the why why do you put the wire in the show Next I put the wire in the show notes. [TS]
◼ ► Maybe one day we should do we should do a discussion on each of the series or something which is I think. [TS]
◼ ► Well you know I was never going to like series five because that's going to get so newspaper [TS]
◼ ► when they do something about something you're an expert in all those series for was in a school zone [TS]
◼ ► but we can assign people what five foot five series of the wife of homework to do if we can tell people to watch cereal [TS]
◼ ► I actually on my Twitter just today I had two tweets in a row from people who said the exact same thing with me that I [TS]
◼ ► Crazy these lives of just stopped with exactly right if we ever do the why we should do it a season at a time that we [TS]
◼ ► would do all five seasons in is where that would be a good way to just gradually erode our listener base rather than do [TS]
◼ ► but very much like the hello internet pod cast I think the wire is a hard show for people to get into theirs [TS]
◼ ► and one of the things that kept me from watching it for years is that it is broadly a police drama in a sense might be [TS]
◼ ► and whenever I heard that my brain automatically categorized it was stuff like Law and Order [TS]
◼ ► and a whole bunch of other shows I just zero interest in the original don't know what it was good before I started [TS]
◼ ► Jerry all back and I can't speak to its quality but it sounds like you're quite a fan of the original stuff was good. [TS]
◼ ► but one of the things for modern audiences in particular that is difficult about The Wire is I mean it was you know [TS]
◼ ► But first of all like old style sitcoms that shot in a four three ratio as opposed to a one nine hundred six ratio. [TS]
◼ ► and it was also standard definition there was no high definition version but so just recently H.B.O. [TS]
◼ ► Has released a high definition wide screen version of The Wire the widescreen I was very suspicious [TS]
◼ ► when I first heard about this because David Simon the Creator is sort of in the Tory asleep picky about the way things [TS]
◼ ► and high definition because if you ever see like behind the scenes footage of people making a movie they shoot much [TS]
◼ ► much bigger than is actually ever cropped down to even in cinematic films you can see they usually like like what you [TS]
◼ ► and so they're actually filming the whole image. But they're going to crop it down to just a smaller section. Yeah. [TS]
◼ ► So they finally went back to the original footage of the wire and we're using the wider shots. [TS]
◼ ► and people were furious because they just tons of shots where you could just see the crew standing off on the side [TS]
◼ ► and so I was kind of worried that the new wire release would be like that and I was pretty much just assume. [TS]
◼ ► but then David Simon wrote this interesting blog post talking about how he was somewhat involved in this [TS]
◼ ► and how he was he had someone who was working with him who was going through all the shots in the wire [TS]
◼ ► and it's it is a very interesting article to read from someone who has created a kind of seminal piece of media talking [TS]
◼ ► and The widescreen chance and some things are obviously much worse but it is like the world's most cautious. [TS]
◼ ► and he views it as like an alternate version that might be good for getting people into the series who might otherwise [TS]
◼ ► not. I did say it is necessary myself it doesn't bother me especially H.-T. S.-T. and I care about. [TS]
◼ ► Yes it's I was aware when I watched it the first time when I felt terribly sick at a family reunion a few years ago [TS]
◼ ► and had nothing else to do that the first few episodes I felt like I did have a bit more resistance to it [TS]
◼ ► and if it wasn't for the fact that I had nothing else to watch I'm not sure I would have continued onward. [TS]
◼ ► Thing makes it easier for people so if you are one of the people like I used to be who has heard everyone in the world [TS]
◼ ► Widescreen version might be a good place to start and to to try that show out as we've all really like it [TS]
◼ ► This episode is brought to you by Squarespace Squarespace is the easiest way to create a beautiful website blog [TS]
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◼ ► Really kick the tires on the whole service and you'll like them when you decide to sign up for a square space. [TS]
◼ ► As always we want to thank Squarespace for their support of this show Squarespace build it beautiful. [TS]
◼ ► Last episode we talked about something we didn't have time to talk about which you dubbed You Tube I can say this very [TS]
◼ ► For all the people who think that's me swearing no one is that if that's me swearing that's me swearing I know we say [TS]
◼ ► and as an ass on the list of words I do say so I have a I have a question for you about this list [TS]
◼ ► and not done to derail it here but not so that occurred to me so you don't say these words. [TS]
◼ ► Yeah and I totally respect that. Could you write the words. Would that be breaking the streak. [TS]
◼ ► but let's say you know on the Reddit or you know on the Internet like you do you're getting into some huge argument [TS]
◼ ► and you want to call someone. Working right. Yeah like you don't read it sometimes. Yeah but like they did. [TS]
◼ ► Would you feel comfortable writing those words I mean if the person really deeply deserved it I would not do that [TS]
◼ ► but OK would you think that you were breaking your streak though is that why you wouldn't do it [TS]
◼ ► and I think you could take it both ways that it does maybe it breaks the street maybe it doesn't [TS]
◼ ► Maybe I just wouldn't I wouldn't right not to be thought I think I think you'll be getting the base out there. [TS]
◼ ► Now right now i wasn't it wasn't like we're going to have you know which cheating if we're recording this quite soon [TS]
◼ ► but it's still been a while since last summer record that that one out actually produce the stuff. [TS]
◼ ► Yeah again this is just like a very minor thing. However it's not like it's been built out let's just crack on cam. [TS]
◼ ► I find that there are many things in You Tube which feel unfinished might be the kindest way to put it. [TS]
◼ ► when I'm using it it's a bit like some someone was just trying to check that like a good enough tick box [TS]
◼ ► and they got there and just left it and like when I make the bed versus when my wife next to bed sounds very likely. [TS]
◼ ► and for a couple things I'm working on I've decided OK I'm going to go all in on a new You Tube feature because this is [TS]
◼ ► obviously the thing that they want people to use but this is the thing that has struck me as remarkably half. [TS]
◼ ► Fast and it is what You Tube is calling cards I just remembered that you told me to go and look at it and I haven't. [TS]
◼ ► but like I say in this thing that I WANT ME TO DO I haven't even a clue what is clicked on it. [TS]
◼ ► OK just like you explaining it to everyone else on many of the generalist nature of everyone else first on You Tube at [TS]
◼ ► the moment the future many people may be familiar with our annotations and so the way this works is this is [TS]
◼ ► Aside from this video they want you to sign up for an email list they want you to go check out somebody else's video [TS]
◼ ► and It's a hyperlink at the link and we're going to we're going to talk about how rubbish that system is. [TS]
◼ ► Well I mean it is a terrible What do you want to complain I don't have anything about that in particular well I just [TS]
◼ ► and years ago on the Internet it's like do you know this is what made me think about a manned. [TS]
◼ ► Well why don't you just broke into my office. She actually she literally destroy I literally just opened the door. [TS]
◼ ► You can use a lock picking kit you just left the door unhinge as she walked in. That's interesting. [TS]
◼ ► She broke into not going to kick around a bit over selling it. She so cute. Granny you are such a softie. [TS]
◼ ► You know she's cute she's super cute. I can honestly say she's the cutest Wow I've ever seen. [TS]
◼ ► She's so popular at the park as well because she hasn't got a personality like she's really brave and friendly [TS]
◼ ► and everyone loves if she's like a celebrity like like people I've never met I walk up to them in the park [TS]
◼ ► or do you run up to them and oh look it's Audrey and they'll start talking to a lot and I know you are [TS]
◼ ► and I haven't even given how many times her youtube videos have been watched I think it is fair to say that she might [TS]
◼ ► And I'll see if I can make it make a noise making noise mental snuff we know it to the microphone go on which is now [TS]
◼ ► Like nothing ever happened like nothing ever happened yeah the really smooth at a point there. [TS]
◼ ► Yeah the problem with the annotations is I don't want to go to like metier and to be in a house here and bore people [TS]
◼ ► and this is not got nothing to do with an ad or a sponsorship but this is made me realize and more than ever [TS]
◼ ► and they're back in for like you know designing things in betting videos and putting pictures in [TS]
◼ ► and changing your layout and designing things is like a pleasure to you and it looks good and it's smooth [TS]
◼ ► and it makes me realize how come square space which is clearly a smaller company than You Tube [TS]
◼ ► and Google can make this really nice easy thing to use and the mighty mighty you chib when it makes its back end. [TS]
◼ ► Popping on I run a Taishan stuff gives us this clunky thing where we're having to imprecisely drag things [TS]
◼ ► If you watch a lot of videos You Tube video something you'll notice which I feel a need to point out right now is that [TS]
◼ ► when people use annotations you can usually make the annotation a little color so it's clear that you can click on this [TS]
◼ ► and I just want to clarify for people is on my video is on every You Tube video you will ever go to the boxes always [TS]
◼ ► look it looks like some child trying to outline whatever it is you can click if it's clear that it was what it was to [TS]
◼ ► and the reason it is it is so hard to precisely place those rectangles you just you wouldn't believe how hard it is to [TS]
◼ ► draw a rectangle that's exactly where you want to pixel perfection as always just is just not even worth it. [TS]
◼ ► You can now I'll spend two minutes trying to make this to exactly the right size or whatever. [TS]
◼ ► I put it around the box because of going and controlling the moment it pops up on the screen [TS]
◼ ► and comes off that's all right they are either that or take forever etc It is it is rather. [TS]
◼ ► but at the very least people who use You Tube A lot are used to this idea of you click on the screen. [TS]
◼ ► But here is the thing that's been going on now for a few years is that annotations don't work on mobile devices. [TS]
◼ ► and more people are watching obviously on mobile devices that's really going through the roof. Yes. [TS]
◼ ► but it is fair to say that the growth in mobile watching since I started youtube four years ago is monstrous. [TS]
◼ ► I love how you say mobile American Mobile Mobile not mobile because when these words I think I've forgotten how I say. [TS]
◼ ► Now as I mentioned before anyway so I think it's going to the right if they can click on the screen problem [TS]
◼ ► Who knows why and you know I'm happy to presume there's some technical reason why it's a huge pain in the butt [TS]
◼ ► but over a long time it was just all quiet on the Western Front of what's going to happen if they're going to be [TS]
◼ ► and then I don't know in the past few months maybe You Tube has started to roll out this feature called cards. [TS]
◼ ► Because the annotation system hasn't been updated since one thousand nine hundred five and the cards thing is new. [TS]
◼ ► What is I have no idea what it is actually DO YOU LIKE if you have your i Phone on you or anything. [TS]
◼ ► You don't have you back on your phone your professional You Tube or you don't see how things look on the thing. [TS]
◼ ► You are so infuriating sometimes I don't even think you mean to be infuriating but you really are. [TS]
◼ ► OK So describe this for everybody then you know wait for you to put on have you describe if you are then watching a You [TS]
◼ ► but I haven't tested on Android I have no idea you haven't tested all Android you call yourself a professional You Tube [TS]
◼ ► What were you going forward that was my that was my pompous lecture a telling off voice that he used of me before I [TS]
◼ ► Yeah OK so you're watching a video on You Tube on the app and what happens now is that there's no annotations [TS]
◼ ► and what you can do is if you tap on it it brings up a little picture of here is where the link goes. [TS]
◼ ► I want to say you know if you missed part one tap on the thing you can watch part one first instead of watching part [TS]
◼ ► I thought OK you do want us to use cards I'm going to use cards just like they're just annotations with a slightly [TS]
◼ ► different mechanism and his name sort of but you really need to have looked at this thing this is frustrating. [TS]
◼ ► when you're on the computer open open up open up You Tube on your computer there which I think I was trying to think [TS]
◼ ► but you didn't come into my brain because I have if you say hey do you have a web browser on your computer I know what [TS]
◼ ► and then they have not been to explore here. The good of a human. It's Mike's not even making an explorer for Mac. [TS]
◼ ► Anymore I don't think they do I think so which one are calling up your first look at things we do do to do the second [TS]
◼ ► Yeah I'm going to spend that billionth of a cent there it is. OK I see it actually looks nicer than an annotation. [TS]
◼ ► So when you when you look at the video because I put this right at the start it kind of rolls across the top [TS]
◼ ► and I circle so if you click on that for us it opens up this little window and then you can click again [TS]
◼ ► and it'll take you to lower the Rings part one so I can either click on the video we were trying to find only a weighty [TS]
◼ ► and collect all the ad revenue as the whole pocket for I think these are nicer than annotations. OK so probably. [TS]
◼ ► and I want to be really clear I am not against cards because the annotation stuff is quite frankly in twenty fifteen [TS]
◼ ► We look awful so they are trying to make you thing these cards look nicer and achieve the same functionality. [TS]
◼ ► But here is here is the thing where I start to get really frustrated with the half assed this of it. [TS]
◼ ► and it looks like the information thing like you see in like an airport is a circle with a letter I understated [TS]
◼ ► and it's not OK. You notice where it is on the screen top right corner. OK what normally goes in the top right corner. [TS]
◼ ► when I write it normal normally for four channels that's where they put the little branding box slash subscriber [TS]
◼ ► and if you know you watch like destines video he has a little smarter every day logo and it's in the top right. [TS]
◼ ► And it acts as a watermark and it also acts as a button the people can press to subscribe to the channel. Yeah. [TS]
◼ ► So now if you put a card on a video it goes in the exact same place that branding box would go under or over [TS]
◼ ► or instead a no no in place of raw so you have to choose between either the branding box or the little I [TS]
◼ ► and this to me seems like the half acid ness because it's like OK You Tube this four corners of the screen you have the [TS]
◼ ► or they're not going to touch their sacred caliber of advertising down the bottom of the bottom middle goes for the ad. [TS]
◼ ► Yeah. Bottom left is the channel wide suggested suggested videos. So you sometimes see that pop up. [TS]
◼ ► It still leave the You Tube to corners to pick from. I think top left makes the most sense for where the I should go. [TS]
◼ ► and then you get taken away to Russian brides or whatever so they may have a purpose or a goal [TS]
◼ ► but for some reason they decided to to have an overlap on where the branding part supposed to go. [TS]
◼ ► Now this is really irritating because the branding boxing was sold to us as oh hey we want you guys to stop manually [TS]
◼ ► and we're bringing across this whole solution of now like we have this branding box you don't have to do that it'll [TS]
◼ ► just pop up automatically inital nicely rescale based on the size of the video that people are watching so it was this [TS]
◼ ► like solution that was brought on board and so I stopped more manually watermarking a bunch of my videos [TS]
◼ ► but now if I want to have anything anywhere in the video that people want to click it doesn't even matter if that card [TS]
◼ ► is not supposed to appear until the last ten seconds of the video that little white I will be there the whole time. [TS]
◼ ► Also this cut you don't you can control this card in terms of have different cards come up at different times. [TS]
◼ ► It's as if that wasn't half assed enough if you watch is the exact same video on your i Pad They put the little guy in [TS]
◼ ► So it's not consistent between devices and then the other thing that drives me crazy is on your computer. [TS]
◼ ► The little guy is in a circle. On your i Pad or on your i Phone They put the little guy on a pile of squares. [TS]
◼ ► We have a whole different icon which is kind of vaguely falsely Fredy for people to click and like OK how like how men. [TS]
◼ ► They couldn't coordinate between the two of them which freaking corner it's supposed to go in [TS]
◼ ► and so I'm trying to think in the future like when you tell people oh hey click on the whatever. [TS]
◼ ► There's no answer to the question. I can't say click on the i in the upper left hand corner. [TS]
◼ ► and I can say the reverse on the computer because it's going to be in the opposite direction on on your i Pad [TS]
◼ ► but this to me just like screams half assed sadness that somebody just like through this together. [TS]
◼ ► Because we just couldn't be bothered to coordinate between the mobile team and the desktop team and then it's. [TS]
◼ ► Like it doesn't sound like it's a huge problem but it's really nice if you can tell people where to click. [TS]
◼ ► But you don't have to say OK there is no way to say click on the left or click on the right right. [TS]
◼ ► You can even say click on the circle because there's a square on the other thing right so the other thing is they can [TS]
◼ ► and then tomorrow they could implement a sot wide change where they change it to a question mark or something. [TS]
◼ ► and it's like if you watch if you watch old youtube videos you know the descriptions used to be on the side of the video [TS]
◼ ► and so like I call the old blog brothers videos they tell you to click on the link it's in the description [TS]
◼ ► and they're always pointing to one side of the screen which then you know just look silly now because they move where [TS]
◼ ► and that's a problem if you want to make videos that last a long time where people are going to click on a thing you [TS]
◼ ► just end up looking dumb because you're talking about a thing that doesn't quite exist or don't do that then. [TS]
◼ ► It has its limitations and I don't agree it's a bit half baked but even if it wasn't half baked [TS]
◼ ► and it was implemented beautifully you still couldn't trust just like just what the world brothers' example you go [TS]
◼ ► and you know people say click the Subscribe button I point down to where the subscribe button used today [TS]
◼ ► and it's not there anymore like you eat anything that is not part of the video you're making on the screen. [TS]
◼ ► I guess my point is if you can't make the freaking I go in the same spot on two different platforms you're starting out [TS]
◼ ► Yes if I say you couldn't the only thing that could be better is that they put it in the bottom left on i Phones [TS]
◼ ► So the other thing that irritates me about this and it's going to be a little bit trickier to describe [TS]
◼ ► And so OK so they say I want to link to my website for my e-mail list like I did in the last video [TS]
◼ ► and Then I give it a title and then I have to put the little text that says oh like Click here for the actual card. [TS]
◼ ► I spent a whole afternoon trying to play around with this because those three fields appear in different places under [TS]
◼ ► Sometimes on the computer it seems to pop up that it says click here is what appears on the top of the screen instead [TS]
◼ ► and I I just I'm like I'm not an idiot. I do this for a living. There's no way to make this look. [TS]
◼ ► I Pad So like there's no correct listing of descriptions you can possibly And again this is just like half assed edness [TS]
◼ ► and if you're looking at like the lower the Rings video right now if you click on that I will show you all of the cards [TS]
◼ ► that exist for this video. Oh hang on first of all going to give you another billionth of a cent. Thank you. [TS]
◼ ► I came in on they are going to be quick on the eye you'll see this video I have two cards at the very top one is Lord [TS]
◼ ► Of The Rings part one. Yeah and the bottom one is to get the wallpaper. Yeah like that's going to happen. [TS]
◼ ► But so if you're watching at the end of the video and you want to click on that wallpaper link. [TS]
◼ ► So like a three step process and the annotations used to be like Click on this link or click on my face and boom done. [TS]
◼ ► and it's a we it's a weird thing on the i Phone as well that if you click on the I it shows you every single link [TS]
◼ ► and then tap on that it's just it's it's weird it's it's this is a thing that I had was with a couple of You Tube [TS]
◼ ► but here's the thing Jim I have a Palm Pilot back in the day Brady not to be the Palm Pilot It's not that there's a [TS]
◼ ► and I had one of the holsters on my belt from Palm Island. Wow Did you have a big bunch of keys on your belt. [TS]
◼ ► This was in college by the way let me tell you the ladies they were driven crazy by my partner [TS]
◼ ► The guys who made the operating system that they had a dude whose job was to count taps how many taps did it take to do [TS]
◼ ► a task and his whole job was to try to eliminate the number of taps it took to do something like send an email [TS]
◼ ► or whatever it is I swear You Tube employs an antique tap counter because there's so many things that they change [TS]
◼ ► Yeah there's one thing I can do now in about five clicks which they bring in a new system and I counted it [TS]
◼ ► and I sent them an email. It was something like oh it'll take twenty five clicks on the new system it is infuriating. [TS]
◼ ► I mean the one one thing that I can talk about is that they just change the way like if you want to upload captions to [TS]
◼ ► Like English language captions I've I've you know I've already written a script for my video I can upload that script [TS]
◼ ► to youtube. It used to just be like a three click process but now it's a five quick process. [TS]
◼ ► Plus there's some bizarre reason I can figure out you have to wait for like a minute it says OK you know we're [TS]
◼ ► Every time you change something it shouldn't be more clicks and more time to get the same thing done. [TS]
◼ ► and I don't I I don't know what to say I feel a bit like I feel it's only for the listeners I feel like I can imagine [TS]
◼ ► but I am sometimes baffled by some of the decisions they made I mean when we were at one time and we got to see [TS]
◼ ► and you know well you know asking our opinions on things just they know it's really it's not like we're in there to [TS]
◼ ► call the shots and yeah and we would raise a few things with them but you seem really obvious and market was like. [TS]
◼ ► Funny how if you can you know see this is in signs like this is can you not say this is a problem and it's like [TS]
◼ ► I've spoken to a bunch of people who work in youtube every one of them individually is very nice [TS]
◼ ► Yeah yeah but but like systemically The group does something that none of the individuals might want to have happen [TS]
◼ ► and I have like I have a remarkably long list about things that I hate about these new cards [TS]
◼ ► You can just change the link this is all of these little things about it that just scream haphazardness [TS]
◼ ► but I have a more of a more to to brought this out now which is ones one the second you know why using them if you [TS]
◼ ► when I'm well I don't know if you should be using them I use them because I like to link to stuff in my videos [TS]
◼ ► Here's with my my regular My regular viewers have noticed that the number of annotations that I put in my videos has [TS]
◼ ► dropped off and that's for a couple of reasons but one of which is it just seems to me really obvious that the anatase. [TS]
◼ ► and so I always feel like as soon as I get like the tiniest whiff that a system is not going to be continued. [TS]
◼ ► And so at this stage I basically use annotations at the end of my videos mostly and kind of Nowhere else. [TS]
◼ ► And then when the cards come on board I feel like well I'm happy to go and work with this new system [TS]
◼ ► So if I have to use a thing that people can click on their i Phones I think that's a real deal breaker at this point [TS]
◼ ► So I put these cards in so that right now at the end of my video there is an annotation that people can click [TS]
◼ ► but there is also a card at that point which a person can tap and then scroll and then find the right place [TS]
◼ ► and then tap on the wrong thing and then tap on the actual link and then get to the place where they need to go. [TS]
◼ ► At this moment I have a ton of videos with cards that just look ridiculously stupid because I did something in the [TS]
◼ ► But so there's tons of cards a pop up my videos either to say Click Me and there's no indication about what it is [TS]
◼ ► and it's just I feel so stupid I hate that stuff it is hard to prioritize going back to fixing it. [TS]
◼ ► Yeah but I have I have it I have a slightly other example of half ass or e YES YOU CAN STOP ME about here [TS]
◼ ► and one of the things that has driven me crazy for years is why can't you be as good as Netflix for watching videos [TS]
◼ ► Like crash course which has courses that go in order is a crash course is doing world history you want to watch those [TS]
◼ ► or wheezy waiter who makes daily blogs his videos he uploads every day he has enormous number of videos you could have [TS]
◼ ► or periodic videos where they do all the elements in the periodic table in order while you do all the elements in order [TS]
◼ ► and then Boron I don't think it's going to be like oh I missed a development in the plot here right. [TS]
◼ ► Yeah where did this clown come from right where with with with the waiter it's helpful to watch him every day. [TS]
◼ ► and here's part one that doesn't exist anywhere. And secondly why can't it be like on Netflix where. [TS]
◼ ► and then it will just play the next one I don't understand why isn't there a place on youtube where I can go [TS]
◼ ► and you can pick up where you left off. Oh you were in the middle of Crash Course world history. [TS]
◼ ► and I think anybody who's ever tried to watch a video on You Tube that says you know Part one [TS]
◼ ► and then you can see in the sidebar it says Part two Part seven Part six. When we get to get to part two. [TS]
◼ ► Like this shouldn't be a problem the creator should be able to tell You Tube Here is the sequence of videos [TS]
◼ ► and yeah I said to this guy you know why this is the case why don't you tell me why this is the case. [TS]
◼ ► and I the control to shepherd the view is where we want to shepherd them next they're about shepherding them where they [TS]
◼ ► I know you're right you know this is what I found out you know this is something you you know this is what you say all [TS]
◼ ► and I are trying to push the viewer to what we think they should watch next using our annotations and cards [TS]
◼ ► and suck you in to suck you into the black hole of crappiness. Well I do know what you're saying there. [TS]
◼ ► In some sense I think You Tube is bad at both of these because if you're watching videos on a channel it will recommend [TS]
◼ ► Yeah but I know you're bad at both of these things you could optimize for money better but you don't. [TS]
◼ ► I mean this is why I happen to be lucky that the kind of videos I make are are like tailor made for You Tube's [TS]
◼ ► They're all said to be great videos and it doesn't matter at all what order you watch them and for the most part. [TS]
◼ ► Yeah like that's it's it works for me but I find it just infuriating and it's why I mean there are many reasons [TS]
◼ ► and I remember particularly like I'm just trying to fight this system so hard to watch stuff in order. [TS]
◼ ► I mean of course you know I don't need to tell you there are things like playlist and stuff like that [TS]
◼ ► I have tried to maintain a playlist of my videos in chronological order for people who do want to watch them in order [TS]
◼ ► And someone like wheezy waiter I think is Larry is because I'm actually on Twitter a while back I was like this like [TS]
◼ ► something somebody must've made a playlist somewhere of all the wheezy waiter videos in order [TS]
◼ ► and it turns out he's uploaded so many videos that he broke in the the limit of how many videos I have in a place I [TS]
◼ ► and so then you know even even if you care about this stuff there's all these arbitrary limits that are going to just [TS]
◼ ► be frustrating and the playlists won't remember where you were you know how I'm going to scroll back [TS]
◼ ► but it is also frustrated they're not even they're not even optimizing for the money it seems like clearly in the [TS]
◼ ► sidebar. So just let me watch things in order to remember where I was but they won't they won't ever do it. [TS]
◼ ► Give any half assed complaints about You Tube I've just been blathering on about stuff most people don't care about you [TS]
◼ ► want to hype up this topic it's irresponsibility may get off on now no no I wish I was. I was hype. [TS]
◼ ► but you really have gone off on one I don't know why I if I worry about how interesting this is to people who just [TS]
◼ ► and you know have you know two guys who make You Tube videos for a living because I went to them to people to talk [TS]
◼ ► So yeah I'm really there are lots of things that I'm yeshivish just like difficult to do it in [TS]
◼ ► but like you know I have like I can put annotations on my videos in Safari that I can in Chrome So I like I do all this [TS]
◼ ► work uploading a video and then I switch over to crime to put the annotations on at the end and [TS]
◼ ► It's funny I just realized it may very well be the case that it just doesn't work in Safari because I do everything in [TS]
◼ ► Chrome as well because I feel like it gives me a better shot at things working well. You click the far right. [TS]
◼ ► but there are reasons why the reasons there are reasons why you know I have Safari and crime open constantly [TS]
◼ ► and so I do need to have you know you have the whole fun of dealing with the million Google plus accounts. [TS]
◼ ► There are there are lots of things there are lots of things that frustrate me about using each other [TS]
◼ ► Oh I should go in you something like Vimeo and that not not because it's a viable option for me [TS]
◼ ► but just so that I can see how the others do it so before I swag a fugitive I can say the others do it better. [TS]
◼ ► but it certainly it's certainly not a pleasurable experience but I have used you know a little bit a while ago. [TS]
◼ ► And remember thinking that even years ago of him you know with all this is just nicer to me I was just the reverse. [TS]
◼ ► You pay them you know to use it so it is in their best interest to make sure that that from the creator's perspective [TS]
◼ ► I also wonder why you can't look nicer than life in the US but then I remember that that's just a taste thing [TS]
◼ ► Shirts that young people wear of the way that they design things and I think that that's rubbish. [TS]
◼ ► They probably like the garish ness and messiness of the cheaper as I would like it to be more stripped back [TS]
◼ ► It could even be even the logo I mean the logo says it all doesn't it's like you know it's not it's iconic [TS]
◼ ► but it's not classy. Yeah you shouldn't have words in your logo just like you shouldn't have words on your flag. [TS]
◼ ► But I find it really hard talking about You Tube on the podcast like it's almost like any topic can come up with [TS]
◼ ► or expect or not and like all these things pop into my head and my brain starts going off like popcorn [TS]
◼ ► and I want to say this and I want to say that and I get all excited and have all these ideas [TS]
◼ ► and then we start talking about You Tube which should be the thing I have the most probably is the thing I have the [TS]
◼ ► most knowledge about and I should have a passion about it. I live on it every day you know I live on. [TS]
◼ ► and the soon as we start talking about it any podcast I just feel you can probably tell what it's really like nothing [TS]
◼ ► when it's just you know at the pub I don't find it so hard on the podcast when I've got in the back of my head [TS]